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Today I had my revenge from my brain that is lately tricking me into illogical fears when in SP, and has led me to waste some good WILDs. So my brain tried to trick me again in an unconscious FA, but I turned the tables.

So I'm having a false awakening, ultra realistic, thought I had woken up. I was laid in my bed thinking. I start hearing my parents' voices from other rooms, but I think "my parents are on a business trip, how the hell can I hear them?" I kept doubting for a little, then I reality checked, and I realised I was dreaming!

I got up ran to the door and before opening it, I thought "how about a lightsaber?" so I reach my pocket and try to visualise it. Shit. Due to excitement of the moment, my dream starts to fade. So I lay on the floor with eyes closed trying to DEILD.

I made it! And it wasn't a reset, I found my dream from where I had left it and kept on with it! I opened the door, walked through the corridor and jumped out of the window. I couldn't fly, I just fell down but wasn't hurt or anything. Suddenly the dream starts to fade, but weirdly! I am suddenly projected on a bike, now 3rd person and I control myself by thought, like a dream-video game! So I realised there was little to do about it and started driving on the streets. Suddenly, the dream collapses.

This dream was really short because I was too excited and had poor dream control. But I fooled my brain back for being a dickhead, so I'm happy!

Zahidah, Mei Ling & Meriliyn were all wearing white lacy form hugging wedding dress. All of them looked really pretty.

I was walking with Zahidah before and saw a photo of a photo session that involved wearing a wedding dress and a veil that covered half the face from the top of the head to the nose. You couldn't see that person behind that veil. We saw a sample of the photo framed up behind a glass window of a photo shop.

The dream went through the havok of choosing a wedding theme and a dress for each of them, they were excited the whole time including me. I was mostly going around taking pictures of the whole thing and ended up being the last one to choose a dress.

The starting a the wedding was at an open space with the 4 grooms wearing white tux coming driving horse drawn chariots. The grooms were laughing and waving at everyone. Following behind them were more people on carriages and horse drawn trucks throwing flowers. They rode from one end to the other end of the field.

The girls came from the same place as the guys, all 4 of them wearing their wedding dressing and a parade of people behind. They did a really complex route and everyone cheered. The girls rode away turning behind showing off their long train lace, laughing and excited.

This whole time I was watching at the side line taking photos and trying to hold up my wedding gown still draped on my arm. I was slightly disappointed that I was not taking part, but I was still awed at the magnificence of the whole wedding parade.

So last night I went to be quite late for a college night (11:30ish) and woke up at 7:15ish, and whenever I do this I seem to have pretty crappy recall

On the plus side, it's been a lovely summers day today here in England! I've been sticking to my one fag a day, which is proving much nicer. I hated being addicted to smoking! I'm aware many people probably would say that if I'm having 1 fag a day then what is the point in not fully giving up, but I disagree personally! To me it's like a coffee :-)

I started my second year of college today, which was pretty good! I have a new, amazing philosophy teacher who has proved very helpful already, and I'm doing an extended project qualification on Buddhism which will be fun too!

Last night, my friend showed me a wonderful video on spirits and chakra, and it's changed my life. Generally, I'm a very happy guy at the moment - it feels strange being this happy after so long of being down!

Tonight, I'm going to set my alarm for 5 hours after I go to bed, as that's proved pretty successful for consistent lucids recently!

Much love to you all, stay happy and love everything!

Calum xx

I am standing in front of a super market. There I meet and clan of some sort. Their aim is to kill all the evil people in the world. I some how earn my way into this clan. Now I stand there with them in front of the store. We are all armed with massive shotguns. We locate a target and we are going to shoot him. I want the shot. But I don’t see how we are going to shoot someone in open air. I wait for the people around to leave. But one of the clan members goes ahead and shoots him. He reduced to a bloody pulp. We now run into the super market as fast as we can. We run aisle through aisle. I am exhilarated. I am enjoying our fast escape. I am the then greeted with a fruit stand. I jump over it but my feet catch the tip of it. Instead of flying face forward, I just float up a little and clear the fruit stand. I land on my feet and continue my run. I now see other members slide through a hole in one of the aisle. I also slide through it but not as ninja as the other members. Once through the hole I am in the clans living area. It is sick. I am instantly overwhelmed with euphoria. I am stoked to know that this is where I’ll be living for the time being. The are tables and tables of all the best foods, plenty of fun providing objects stolen from the store and very comfy beds. I go to one of the members and hug him very hard saying “Thank You Thank You Thank YOU!”

So there has been something that I've noticed about my dreams lately.. So far they have all had something to do with a cousin of mine who passed early January. He never speaks in my dreams but He always looks at me and smiles as if he was saying "I'm alright." I'm honestly 100% okay with this but soon I want to go lucid when this happens to see how that goes.. Maybe I'll find out that it's really him coming down to give me closure. Or maybe it's just my mind showing me what I want to see. Either way I'll be happy~

As i'm already poor at recalling dreams (i literally remember one a month, since before starting lucid dreaming) i really want to change that and acheive this, I am putting all my effort into it and have researched the matter for some while now.

I have gained a lot of valuable information not only through this site but through others including videos on YouTube and sites similar to this.

I have my dream journal at my bedside with a pen, I have dream written on my hand. I have notes on my phone that go off every hour that say dream. I'm doing everything in my power to conquer this feat.

I'm hoping that by using this website it will allow me to continue to think about lucid dreaming which will in-turn, help me to lucid dream.

I don't know if i'm doing it right in all honesty, but this morning, i woke up (keeping my eyes shut and staying in my usual sleeping position, as instructed) and all i could think about was dragging a dead baby out of a bin or something along them lines. Weird, i know. But meh, i was happy to have at least have something on my mind whilst awakening. So i wrote it down.

After waiting a few minutes i left my bed and trundled down stairs. Then i remembered even more, words can't describe how happy i was to have actually remembered something. But all i remember was a lot of weed (marijuana) on the floor, all ground up. I can't remember any emotions, but it's almost like i'd dropped a load and it was on the floor, maybe at the bottom of some stairs.

Thinking about this, who's to say i didn't just make it up? The dead baby thing? When i woke up just to give myself some sort of satisfaction that i'm making progress. Either way, i'm quite happy with this. going from probably 2% dream recall to having one straight after i started teaching myself to lucid dream. It makes me excited to continue and i hope i accomplish what i've set out to do.

Lucid Dream Dream Non Dream

non-dream non-lucid Lucid

Dream one: I was at church. I went outside and suddenly I was in some room(I think I had been heading to the church van but I had seen the others or something). My friends Scotty, Becca, Caleb, and my mom were there. Suddenly Caleb walked up to me and put his mouth either near on on my ear (yeaaah he kinda kissed me I guess) (not sure how that works out but ehhh whatever). Scotty had a O.O "holy crap" face, Becca had a :3 "d'awww" face, and my mom had a D:< "wth was that!!" face. I blushed really red and hid my face. The end of that dream...

Dream two: I was in a car all alone. I knew I had to get home. Somehow I was on the passenger side holding onto the steering wheel. I was afraid. Wait no, terrified. I got into the driver seat and gripped that wheel like I would die if I let go. I got lost and I turned on the GPS. It didn't help me. I couldn't call my mother for help. I was terrified and I thought I was going to die. I then woke up.

I think this dream shows my true terror of the thought of driving. I'm sure I'm overreacting.


Well, there you have it. Please comment.

Dream - Lucid

I was in an airport I think. I saw Chris walking by, and we met eyes. We both couldn't stop staring at one another. I didn't think he was going to want to talk to me or see me, but he came up to me and hugged me. I hugged him back. I felt the old, familiar feeling of my arms wrapping around him, but not all the way because he's big. I was so, so happy to be in that moment! It was a beautiful feeling.

More things happened, I walked somewhere with him and talked to some other people, but I can't remember any more details. The main thing I recall is the feeling of hugging him and the happiness it brought me.

~

I was sitting on the couch in my living room at my house in my hometown. I looked to my left towards the entrance to the room, and saw my friend Jase and some of his friends standing there. More of them started to come into the room. Jase was apparently having some sort of get together with his friends at my house. I felt a little irked, because he never asked me if it was ok for him to do that.

Then, I was sitting on the other side of the couch. Jase and his buddies were all in the living room. I remember Jase sitting on one of the chairs with someone else. Jase saw me and said
"Krista!" He then gave me a big hug.
On the other side of the couch sat my mom. I leaned over to her, pointed to Jase and whispered
"See that guy? He's my communist friend. He didn't ask if it was ok for him to do this."
My mom then started to talk to Jase and ask him questions. The one that I remember was
"Do you still keep up with your journal?" (journal=blog in this context). She said something about reading his journal.

Then, I saw something on the TV. It was some sort of indie political movie.
"Typical," I thought to myself.

Then, I looked at the coffee table, and there was a Scrabble board on it. It was totally full of letters; there were no empty spaces. I started to mess with the letters, taking some of them off the board, and then figured I should ask Jase if his friends and he were done with the game. I asked, and he said yes. As I asked, I noticed that I kept sniffling and my throat was sore. It was like I was coming down with a bad cold.

I then started to play with the letters on the coffee table. I was, for some reason, trying to spell the word "FULL". I couldn't find two L's. I thought I had at first, but realized I had two U's instead. I thought about using a blank tile in place of an L, but then thought that was silly, since I had all the letters right in front of me. I finally spelled it. The tiles looked something like this:

[F]
[ ] [ ] [U] [ ] [ ]
[L]
[L]

I then was in or playing some sort of video game where it was like I was in space trying to jump onto a swinging platform, and I kept falling because my timing was wrong. When I finally made it, I had to talk to some woman and show her a key. I showed it to her, and it looked like this ceramic knife my mom bought in waking life. She took the sheath off of the knife, which looked like a ceramic key now, and said that it was the wrong thing. She gave it back and I re-sheathed it.

I wrote this some time ago, but not in my offline DJ:

"I had a dream that made me sad when I woke up. I don't remember when I dreamed it, but I recently remembered it. It wasn't the dream itself that was sad, so it wasn't that my day was affected by something imagined. However, the emotions in the last moments of the dream did stay with me at the instance of wakefulness. In the time just after realising you're awake but before you realise where you are, I went from so unbelievably bliss full to hollow and empty feeling.

I don't know how the dream started or where it went to get to this final point - it's probably inconsequential and certainly nonsensical - but at the final point in my dream, I was happier than I can remember being for a long time. My dream was very simple, I think, but since I only remember the last moments I can only say conclusively that the idea was simple. In the dream I was seemingly as I am now apart from one single difference. You may see it as minor or you may see it as major. I was married, presumably, and holding the love of my life who was pregnant with our first child. I remember the sunlight on her face and her smiling. I just felt content, and wished things could stay like this for ever.

Then I woke up. Not like being torn away or fading out but instantly jerked into that semi-concious state, one moment there, the next here. I realised I was alone and wondered why. Then I realised I didn't know this woman and couldn't remember her face. How could I forget her? Finally, full conciousness hit and I remember life as it is. I realised that I had been dreaming. In the moment I remember being the saddest I have been in some time. I remember feeling hollow. Then I got on with my day, and forgot about it, mostly."

That was the most emotially intense dream fragment I've ever had. I don't know what made me remember it now, but when I do remember it, I feel sad. It sounds cheesy, but I can still see her face, when I remember this dream.

WAKING LIFE DREAMING LUCID
BOLD IF IT FEELS PARTICULARLY SIGNIFICANT

From 4/22/11

Visiting my aunt and family in a further west state. She is a counselor and her husband is leading a group session for all of her clients (only female clients?). Something happens and he can’t do it anymore. She first hints around at me doing it but I don’t get it, I think I’m under qualified. She then outright asks me and I’m torn. What a fascinating thing to do, and it would pay decently and I could potentially move back to the bay area sooner, further west of my aunt’s state. I am concerned about leaving my mom (who I’m helping in ways in RL) but I think she’ll be fine. I’m concerned about giving up my unemployment benefits, but it looks like my aunt will pay me very well so that isn’t an issue.

I ask my aunt about various things about the job, trying to get a good idea of what it is like and what the contract she’s thinking of is like. She is kind of resistant, but I subtly insist that we are clear so there aren’t any disagreements down the road.

All of these women who come to the meeting bring dogs. We put the dogs in a room, perhaps the garage, while the meeting occurs. A dog is left in the living room; a little black cute thing.

It looked like a combo of these two,
and all black.

It is about to go to the bathroom on the carpet. My aunt notices and I stop it by saying, “come on” in a happy and light tone and it immediately perks up and bounds playfully over. I’m happy to be with a dog that is so happy. Good, no mark on the carpet. Walking over to the garage, the dog stops again and this time pees and shits on the carpet and I can’t stop her. Well, crapola.

Nothing to do with the dream,
but during my image search
it uh popped out at me, lol.

1-2/4/11

Entry reads like that of a fragmented dream, but was written right after waking from it. In the dream I saw both good and bad outcomes in this experience, I guess my split personality, the nature of my love for her and her actions towards me, may be a factor.

3:22 am
Its weird, I was in a world with Georgia, and things just seemed... right. There was a oneness about it, I was trusting, as was she... Fragments... Down a path with her, path getting darker, bright light for a few hundred metres, then darkness (metaphor for my relationship with her?)... holding her, confronting her, one face is a devil that hates but another face is soothing and loving... The words I wanted to hear "I still love you" and the words I dread "Nothing between us".... I don't know, this one left me on the verge of tears but also happy. Mixed emotions messing me up right now...

10.02.2011

Meeting Dreamer (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I was in some sort of fighting tournament. The tournament was playoff based, with only one fight per round. All the DC I saw were random and appeared very strong. Also, there was a female DC.
It was my turn to fight and I entered the arena, I was a little afraid but I had to embrace. The battle ended pretty fast making me a victor. It was also my turn to fight again and I felt I did not rest from the previous fight. I was walking around the resting area a little worried. The resting area was made like a Colosseum. The walls and the floors were made of big squares of dark gray stones and some dirt. I had to fight a huge guy, but for some reason, I saw a book in the battle arena. I opened the book and realized it was that guy's Akashic Records. I started to mess up with them until he went bananas and defeated himself.

I exited the area waiting for quarter finals. I had to face this female DC and she told me, "Do not even thing in messing up my Akashic Records. I am a psychic and if you try, you will get confused and defeating you will be easy."

While I was planning what to do, I asked to myself, "What the hell I am doing in a battle arena? I do not fight! I am a spiritual person, not a fighter. I turned lucid and wondered where the that weird dream came from.

I exited the Colosseum and saw a dirt road. I decided to fly to make my dream stable. The sky was very blue, not even one cloud. I could feel the warmth from the sun on my face. I felt great. Dreamer came to my mind and the warm feeling arrived. I saw mountains on my way and flew faster, hopping to find Dreamer.

The mountains were very high but I could fly over them. I landed in a green and beautiful field. The field was surrounded by mountains and the sky was still very blue. The ground, was all dark green grass. I saw Dreamer meditating in the middle of the field. I flew towards her and I sat in front of her. I had a very intense warm feeling, bigger than ever and I was very happy. All I wanted to do was to stay with Dreamer. She opened her eyes and she hugged me. I felt joy. The dream started to fade and I really wanted to stay more time with Dreamer. I started to move my eyes and the dream quality increased.

Dreamer told me, "I am very happy to see you. I feel very connected with you. It is so great we are dreaming of each other all the time." I realized that due our time zone, she was not dreaming yet, so I figured she might have been thinking about me or a piece of her consciousness traveled to my dream. Dreamer did not act nor had the same energy as a regular DC.

Dreamer decided to lie down in the grass. I also did. We were looking at each other eyes. It was a continuous, permanent and without distraction eye contact. I knew I was going to ruin my REM, but I did not care. It was the perfect moment. Dreamer and I were looking into each other's eyes and after a while, the dream started to fade. I allowed it to end and woke up with a perfect image of Dreamer face, eyes and smile.

I am at high school, when I see my female friend approaching me, looking nervous and excited. After some small talk, she tells me that she thinks I'm hot. I laugh nervously, saying something along the lines of "okay." She giggles, embracing me as we make out. After about the third kiss, she seems to notice my inexperience with romance, ans says that I "just kissed her." She recommends that I go a bit more slowly, less kissing and more cuddling. At some point, the dream ends.