It started with a normal dream of going to work, me and me dad and his friend got off of a train, it was some kind of futuristic train station, we were going to work Then went downstairs where the stairs were empty at times But I was always lucid somewhat When we got down there things were different it was like a scene from my old school life blended in That's when I started to dig down into my negative feelings, mostly of how I didn't get a girlfriend in school in high school etc. I started to hear and see alternate stories of the same things, I became my alternate selves, re living their bitterness, or that was my dream memories, and just got deeper and deeper until I accepted death wholly or something similar to that And then I was at home , or at least at some kind of level, with no hope and kind of consumed by hopelessness, I went out and the sky was covered in storm clouds, like multiple thick layers of cumulo nimbi only lighted by a light source high up in the sky, it was like a painting, it was beautiful, Then I was ready, for the unknown, usually I don't engage with scenes like that in a dream or so that's what I thought, but this time I didn't give a damn I knew there was something there, the place represented my mind my whole being I think I'm not sure, So then I said hello? Come on take me. My voice was weak but it echoed everywhere. And as I embraced the sky I rose up into the sky and started spinning slowly , and my whole body was overcome with this feeling of healing and comfort, and I heard an upbeat kind of ambient music and I started to have some kind of monologue about the death of the suffering, and how I set it off and someone named mark The sky cleaned up and it was a warm blue sky and I floated there, marinating in healing energy And then I heard my mom's voice, but it wasn't real because she is still sleeping side note: my feet need cold water, they heat up a lot and causes me to wake up, but some cold water calms my nerves down like nothing else in the world and then I sleep like a baby
Psych fragment At some point it's about Gus and Shawn at an airport working on a case. Then it's Jules being maybe shot and dead, but a few seconds later shows that she fell on yellow gems which were apparently zirconium which heals you, so she survived and Gus and Shawn came to help. I should really really reality check to the series I watch, shouldn't I?
2019, 12-11 Skyrim: The Slaver Trap Regular Dream - Video Game / Semi-lucid - Lucid Dream - Notes I am at a mall with my mother. The fact my mother is coming with me into a mall should have triggered a reality check... she NEVER does that. But it seems normal to me. We go into the mall and start looking around. I have the idea the place is just about to close so we don't have much time. We go into a clothing store and I look to see if there is anything I like that will fit me. Neither my mom nor I find anything in our sizes. We leave and go to a video game / music store. There are both new and used games. I try a demo of a Mario Cart game, but I'm not doing very well. I keep driving off of the road. I start thinking the controller might be broken, because no matter how steady I hold it the car veers off to the right. I leave that and look for my mom. I don't see her. Apparently the game store is open later than the rest of the mall, it is still opening and showing no signs of closing. I go to another demo station. This has a cordless VR headset. I look at the price and cringe, it is almost $2,000. But I can still try the demo! I put the headset on and find I am in Skyrim VR. The graphics look great! I realize there are no controllers, but I can see my hands. My hands are the controllers! I want this sooooo bad... so I get into the demo. I find I am in Windhelm just outside the Palace of the Kings. I have a quest marker near the main gates to Windhelm, so I hurry to there. Ambarys, the dark elf from the New Gnsis CornerClub is there waiting. What does he want? He's one of the most racist assholes in Windhelm, along with Rolff Stone-Head. When I approach him he says he was about to give up on me coming. I wonder if I could help him get over his racist tendencies. I have decided I need a way to do this that doesn’t involve a fus to the face. That is not very effective. With this in mind, as Ambarys and I leave Windhelm I start singing the song See Who I Am by Within Temptation. “Is it true what they say? Are we too blind to find a way? Fear of the unknown clouds our hearts today. Come into my world, see through my eyes. Try to understand, don't want to lose what we have…” Ambarys asks if I’m now a bard, too? I don’t answer, I just continue. “See who I am, break through the surface. Reach for my hand, let's show them that we can free our minds and find a way. The world is in our hands, this is not the end.” Light energy forms around us and flows through Ambarys. I don’t know what brought him to hate those different than him, but this should help more than a fus to the face. We soon arrive at an isolated part of the road from Windhelm to Kynesgrove. I tell Ambarys to keep hidden, I’ll go out there and be a traveler to hopefully draw the orc out. Ambarys says if the orc gets me there’s nothing he can do. I say if the orc gets me it will be the orc’s problem, not Ambarys’. It is late afternoon as I walk down the street as if I’m in no particular hurry to get anywhere. I hear someone call for help from behind a bush. I carefully approach and find a male orc leaning on a tree, holding his side. I ask if he is ok. He says a bandit attacked him and he needs help. I get a little closer and he jumps on me. I respond immediately with a fus. FUS-RO-DAH! The orc is launched into the air. He flies out across the road and slams into a tree. He struggles to get up. I tell him I know he is the one who has been kidnapping travelers and selling them as slaves, that ends now. He is pissed and says I won’t live to tell anyone. I ask where he has been taking the slaves he captures. He says he’ll never tell me. I use my telepathy and read it from his mind. I tell him he just did tell me. He pulls out an axe and comes at me. It is too easy to cut him down with my Alex Mercer blade. I return to Ambarys and ask if he has seen anyone else involved with the slaves. He says no, just the orc. And he only made the one deal with him, he’d never done anything like that before. He seems desperate to make me believe that. He says I have to tell the jarl that. I say my word might not mean a lot since I fus’d said jarl in the face for being rude. He looks shocked and asks what the jarl did… I shrug and say he fus’d me back. Then I start to wonder if I screwed up and will have to load a previous save. Fus’ing Ulfric in the face probably isn’t the best way to get his cooperation, but maybe solving the slave trade issue will make up for it. I tell Ambarys I won’t mention his involvement, but I can’t say that for anyone else. Tell everyone it had to look like he was in on the slave trade to keep from tipping that orc off. And the orc is in multiple pieces, he can’t argue. We are headed back when I wake up.
2019, 08-29 Regular Dream - Video Game - Lucid Dream - Notes Dark Tower of Skyrim: Between Two Worlds I am playing Skyrim VR. I am starting over yet again though I don’t know why. I am in the cart with Ralof, Ulfric, and Lokir. We go through the gate into Helgen. I see Elenwen and I know she and the Thalmor are responsible for my repeating this so many times. I call to her that their plan will fail! The tower will stand, the rose will be preserved, the gunslinger will finish his quest. And I don’t care how many times they make me repeat this timeline! Elenwen looks a bit alarmed, like I wasn’t supposed to realize I’ve been repeating this time period or that their target is the tower. We get off the cart, Lokir runs and gets killed, my name isn’t on the list but the captain says I should die anyway. Then Tullius starts his monologue. Elenwen interrupts and says she wants me executed first. I tell her that won’t do any good. Tullius gets angry and says he’s in charge here, and the traitor will be the first to… then Alduin arrives and torches the building behind Tullius. Everyone runs for cover. I yell after Elenwen that I will find her and I will fus her with a full FUS-RO-DAH! I am surprised when the fus works and Elenwen is blasted from her horse. Ulfric stares at me, then our path to the tower is cut off by Alduin’s flame. So Ulfric and I go into the inn. I hurry through the door into the inn and run into Ulfric, who has stopped. I see we are in the lobby of an apartment building or hotel. Ulfric is completely confused by the modern looking setting. I look for the door back to Helgen, but it is gone. The only door leads out onto a busy modern street. I am thinking this must be one of my mods, but it has started too soon! And Ulfric isn’t supposed to be here! I distract Ulfric from looking outside to the busy street teeming with cars, I tell him I will get him back to Skyrim. But I’m not even sure what is happening, though I don’t tell him that. I follow the sound of voices into a dining room that is filled with a black mist that makes it look like Silent Hill. Father Callahan is in the room holding up the scrimshaw turtle. At least dozens of people are looking at the turtle, enraptured. Many of them have purple auras, others have animal heads, and others have red pulsing holes in their foreheads. Vampires, Taheen, and Can-Toi. I quickly tell Ulfric not to look at the object Callahan is holding or he will be entranced as well. I resist an urge to turn my own gaze on the turtle that emits so much light. I say the vampires are about to attack, I have to help Callahan. He won’t die in this instance! As I approach Callahan the tapestry on the wall is torn down and the ugliest vampires I have ever seen enter the room. It looks like their fangs have grown wild, they have too many teeth to fit in their mouths! Callahan holds a glowing cross towards them and that keeps them at bay. This shift of focus allows a fat Taheen to lunge at Callahan and knock the turtle from his hand. Now several Can-Toi and Taheen move towards Callahan, their leader seems to be a malformed version of Big Bird. I am too far away to attack directly, but not too far away to fus. FUS-RO-DAH! I fus the enemies coming at Callahan, sending them flying across the room. The fus distracts Callahan, however, and the vampires make their move. They all get fus’d by Ulfric as they attack, throwing them against the far wall. Now everyone attacks. At first I am cutting down enemies with my Alex Mercer blade but then I see the dark clouds close around some of the enemies and I think that can be healed. I call up a crescent moon wand like in Sailor Moon and use a moon healing effect to fill the room with light energy. I telepathically tell those healed to get out since Callahan and Ulfric won’t be able to tell them apart from the other enemies. I don’t see details of what is going on, but I hear more fus’ing and quite a bit of gunfire. I know Callahan had a gun, did someone else join in? Soon all of the enemies are either dead or have fled. Now the fight is over, or I thought it was over. I hear a gunshot from out in the black fog and the shot hits Ulfric right between the eyes. Shit! That will break too many quests! It’s a good thing I’d placed a quicksave when I thought the fighting was done. At first I’m not sure how to load that save game, but somehow I make it happen. So this time I am able to throw up a Witchblade shield just in time to block the bullet that would have killed him. I look into the fog but I can’t see who fired the shot. I call out, asking who is out there. But then I feel I am almost out of time. I have to get Ulfric back to Skyrim. But how? I need to find a door… but a door to Skyrim? Is there such a door? But I’m about to wake up. Wake up? Is this a dream instead of a game? No time to consider. I open a portal to Windhelm and I go to push Ulfric through it, no time to explain what is happening. There is another gunshot and this time I can feel the bullet pass between Ulfric and me as I push him towards the portal, but I wake up before I get him through it.
2018, 03-15 The Vengeful One I am in a strange neighborhood. At first glance everything looks normal, but when I look closer I see that everything is actually a twisted version of normal. It’s hard to describe what causes it, but the atmosphere is creepy as if this place is haunted by a malevolent force. The place looks a little familiar but I can’t place when or where I have seen it before. I walk down the street until I see a woman come out of one of the houses. It is a woman with long dark hair and wearing a kimono. She runs right over to me and says she’s glad I finally made it. She says the demon is hiding in that house at the end of the street. I look and I see there is a large house at the end of the street that looks out of place in a neighborhood of average homes. It also looks even more rundown than the other homes, it definitely looks haunted. The woman says there’s a barrier around the house so she’s not sure how I will get inside to get rid of the demon. I tell her I’ll handle it. I even have a song already in my mind to use, The Vengeful One by Disturbed. I absently tell the woman she can sleep soundly in her bed tonight, for judgement falls upon the demon at first light. I go down the street towards the haunted house at the end. Everything seems surreal, the road leading to the house seems to somehow get longer as I try to approach the house. The house seems to be retreating. I wonder if the demon inside is already trying to avoid facing me. I walk faster, then I run, then I jump into the air and fly like they do in Dragonball. With me flying I am finally able to overtake the house and I land on the sidewalk in front of it. There does seem to be a barrier around the house. I call to the house for the demon to come out and face me. A strange growling voice from inside asks who dares to disturb him. I am still thinking of The Vengeful One by Disturbed so my answer is, “I'm the hand of God, I'm the dark messiah, I'm the vengeful one!” I tell the demon to come out and face me. When I get no answer I focus on sensing where the demon is. Somehow I suddenly know the demon’s name, though I do not remember it to record it here. I call the demon out by his name knowing he will have no choice but to emerge now. I see something happening around the house, and in the yard surrounding it. There is smoke coming from some of the black windows. That smoke solidifies into humanoid forms of pure darkness. Those things start coming towards me. Apparently the demon is sending his minions out before him. I find I have two guns holstered by my side, hidden under my Assassin robes. I pull the big revolvers out and I start firing at the dark figures as they come at me. This fits into the song, too. “When you die, you'll know why. For you cannot be saved, you remain enslaved. When you die you'll know why!” My guns make deafening cracks of thunder as I fire, each shot is a headshot somehow, it’s like the bullets are attracted to their targets. “When you die you'll know why. For you cannot be saved, you are too depraved! When you die you'll know why.” And as I blow away the last of the dark specters there is movement around the house, like a cloud of smoke rising off of it. The smoke all gathers at the front of the house and solidifies into another of the specters, but this one is much bigger and has huge black horns on his head and he is wreathed in fire. My first thought is, “Boss fight!” as if I was playing a video game. The demon snarls at me and breathes fire, growling that he is going to annihilate me. I fire my guns at the demon but the bullets disappear into his dark body with no effect. He laughs and says he doesn’t know who I am but my weapons are useless against him. I focus on the song Battery by Metallica and bolts of light energy lightning strike both of my guns. “I'm the hand of God! I'm the dark messiah! I'm the vengeful one!” I advance on the demon, choosing specific spots to fire now… certain parts of the demon that somehow appear more solid. I’m not sure how I am seeing those spots, but I am certain they are weak points. The bullets are charged with light energy and fly at the demon in streaks of light, exploding on impact. The demon just seems more pissed off. He bares down on me as if he thinks he can scare me, looming over me and bathing me in his dark shadow. I point both guns right at his head, right at his dark and empty eyes… and I fire. His head explodes, then his entire body becomes smoke and flows into a black orb that was behind the demon. “No, you don’t!” I yell as I fire bullets into the orb. At first it doesn’t seem to be doing anything but then I see swirls of light in the orb. Cracks of light form in the surface of the orb and then it shatters, the shards dissolve into light. I focus on the song Full Moonlight from the Devil Hunter soundtrack. An orb of energy forms in front of me and then ascends over the neighborhood, shedding a bright light on everything. The light energy seems to permeate the entire neighborhood and beyond, the light seems to wash the shadows and darkness away as it spreads. I am figuring this should make sure no new demon comes to take the old one’s place… As the song is coming to an end the orb of light disperses and bathes the neighborhood and the surrounding areas in sparkly golden sparks of light that settle on everything, finding their way into even the smallest crack and deepest shadow. I turn around and I see the woman from the house coming my way. I ask her if she is ok or if the demon harmed her. She says she is fine, the part of the demon in her was banished the last time I was here and healed her. I look around to see if there is anything else that needs to be done, but everything looks normal now. The neighborhood no longer looks twisted and creepy. The woman says she’s going to make cookies if I want to stick around. But I don’t get the chance to stick around, everything fades to black and I wake up.
2018, 03-04 Haunted House I am in a long hallway. I look around to see where I am. The hallway is dimly lighted and the walls are lined with disturbing paintings but no doors. The paintings all depict people and animals being tortured by monsters, so I do my best to ignore those as I proceed down the hall. As I proceed I notice the hallway seems to be getting distorted, twisting around me until I am walking on the wall instead of the floor. It is proving to be quite disorienting, but I see an opening at the end of the hallway and I make for that. I step through the opening and then immediately fall to my right, landing on the floor of the room. The orientation of the room has corrected itself from that of the hallway. I get to my feet and look around the huge room. The room is almost so large that I could be outside, illuminated by a dim glow. I see torches burning on the walls that appear impossibly far away. Behind me, a door slams shut, blocking access to the weird hallway. Then the door itself disappears and becomes part of a blank wall. I’m not really sure where to go now, so I start walking forward and into the vast room. I see someone up ahead, as I get closer I see it’s a woman with her back turned to me. She has long black hair hanging down her back and it sounds like she is crying. I ask her if she is ok and the crying abruptly stops. The woman slowly turns around and glares at me with hatred in her eyes. She looks like the woman off of The Grudge, her long hair whipping around her head as she turns. She is glaring at me with an incredibly evil look and then she snarls that it’s all my fault. I ask what is my fault? She just repeats that it’s all my fault and then she shrieks like a banshee. As if they’ve been summoned by her shriek a flock of strange birds swoops down attacking me. I focus on Damage Inc. and take them down with a large fireball. She shrieks like a banshee again and now zombies dig their way out of the floor and attack me. I use fire again, blasting the zombies away with fireballs. But I don’t aim any fireballs at the woman, she needs help. After the zombies are gone the woman seems even more pissed. She asks in a rage why I have to always ruin everything? I still don’t know what she is talking about, what I might have ruined. I focus on the song Touch My Heart from the Devil Hunter Yohko soundtrack. More of the birds are attacking, and I see zombies as well, but the song has surrounded me with a shield of light energy and when they try to pass through it they erupt into flames and are consumed. So I focus the energy of the song on the strange woman. Light energy erupts and surrounds the woman as she comes towards me, shrieking louder than ever. I can even hear her shriek threatening to drown out my music. I focus on making sure the music stays louder, but it is near deafening. The song comes to an end and the light energy flows into the woman, and she collapses to the ground. The light becomes momentarily blinding and then it fades… I am now standing in a rather normal looking hallway. It is not too long, and there are doors on both sides. The pictures hanging on the walls are the standard type, landscapes and other places, nothing disturbing or creepy. There is a woman on the floor not far from me. She looks hurt. I go over to her and ask if she is ok. She says she thinks so, but doesn’t sound certain. I focus healing energy through her in case she is hurt. I ask her what happened, she says she’s not sure. She says she saw something of a strange light but she’s not sure what happened. I look around to see if I can find any clues. I see nothing out of the ordinary. Then everything fades as I wake up.
video This video was fun to make this time. The dreams were very visual and gave me lots to draw. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uL5JRXNMWbc Round 1 of dreams. I remembered a part with my sister and I, in a tree. And a part where I was with these people walking through some place I can't remember much about. But it was like there was a word in yellow at the end of each pathway. My memory of it gets a little clearer when I got into this city place. I talked to some guy, maybe asking him for money. Then someone was being fired and someone else got their job. It was a restaurant job. My friend and I were restaurant staff, walking around with glass pitchers of ice water to fill people's cups. A bunch of kids were calling another kid a mean name. I was thinking of telling the kid how he was a great person. Because other kids had such a negative view of him, he would have to develop his own internal sense of self confidence. And define himself instead of letting them define him. I ate a white dessert food in a kitchen. Some kids were saying how they don't eat or use the bathroom on the morning of cooking or eating competitions. My friend A K had a dessert food. I asked for a chunk. I needed a chunk of that dessert food to buy minutes for my phone so I could call him. I went into the kitchen to look up his number in my old phone. It showed an app. I had to select why I didn't install the app. I selected that it was too similar to other apps I already had. Round 2 of Dreams. In one part, I was moving windows around on a computer. At the end of the dreams, I was hearing my sister very emotionally crying and saying some words. Something like, "It was only two weeks. Why did we have to get into a dollar fight?" And something about "Why can't we be in Heaven for now?" Her emotion really affected me deeply. I was watching an electronic screen in the dream as I listened to her, and considered going to comfort her. But I was already listening. I woke up in my physical bed very confused, thinking she was next door. It took me a while to realize that my sister lives upstate and that was just a dream. Round 3 of dreams. I was in my garage moving something. There were some melodic song lyrics I was trying to keep in my mind for when I woke up. I "woke up" in a bright room. I had slept in a hot tub. I was trying to take down the song lyric and all these lights were on. I thought it was too much light to go to sleep again but I really wanted to record the dream. My Mom and Sister were talking in the next room, and I worried that it was making it difficult for me to concentrate on the dream. (It was a false awakening but I didn't know. ) I "woke up" again (in another False Awakening) and this time I was walking by some kids. I saw a really nice looking pink crystal on the ground and gave it to one of the kids. It was a flaky stone. Then I went down a kind of swirly pole thing on a jungle gym. As I walked around, I was relieved to know the last dream had been a false awakening. But, I didn't know this one was also a false awakening! L O L. In the next part I was in my car outside the local deli. A guy looked stuck or confused about where to go. He was with a little girl, maybe his daughter. I had some "dream telepathy" that he was deciding between going to the deli for healthy food or walking elsewhere to an unhealthy place. I called out to him, "Go to the healthy place!" He didn't acknowledge where the words came from but he headed for the deli. I was laying on my back and this older man was standing over me. I forgot exactly what happened but I realized it was a dream. Then I was in "the void" but seeing images flash before my eyes. images, and words. Like credits rolling after a movie. On a black back ground. I tried to pay attention to what I was seeing, knowing I was dreaming. Some cool images appeared. Words appeared, slow enough to try to memorize at first, then sped up. I just relaxed and let it go. I was sort of moving as I watched all this but not really. I have had this feeling before, like in this Spongebob scene I had in another dream, that is hard to explain. It is like I feel like I am moving my physical body but still seeing the dream? But not quite. I was back laying on my back with the older man there again. now he had 2 pairs of scissors. ("Scissor hands kills me, please, please, free me", and circumcision trauma, comes to mind. ) I knew it was a dream and tried to hold back his scissors. I felt he was overpowering me though. I looked in his eyes and started to say, "I love you, father." He wasn't my Dad. But those were the words that came to me. He stopped being an attacker, and became a friend. It seemed like he was really happy. Then that part ended. Right after it ended I was back in that void, same as a paragraph or two ago. Seeing more stuff. The dream was showing me these amazing childrens book covers with colored pencil drawings of cool dinosaur types of things. One was green with a dandelion type of thing on its head. It opened up its dandelion thing. Then the dream showed this other creature flying in the sky. This creature jumped up, went to rocket speed and caught the other flying creature in its dandelion head thing, I guess capturing or consuming it. It was awe inspiring. This was on this island thing. Maybe some more stuff happened on the island thing. But I remember this young girl throwing 3 plastic containers into the water off a tall dock. I asked her why she did that. She said it is all biodegradable basically. I doubted the plastic would dissolve and flew down to pick it up. One thing had purple jelly in it that was getting into the water. This creature swam up to us saying "I am the sugar substitute snail" L O L. I was feeling I might need to use the bathroom and record the dream soon since it had been so long. I thought if I asked the girl her name, it might help me come back to the dream later. I asked, "Young lady, what is your name?" She said Cheyenne or Sheyanne, however it is spelled. I mis heard the first two times and said, "Cyan?", and "Keyeanne?" She kept correcting me until I guessed, "Oh, Sheyanne?" and then I woke up in my physical bed. Round 4 of dreams. This one was quick. Just me at my desk, and hearing a voice say some very relevant things to my waking life. One was, "It is all about silencing the mind." And some other more personal advice I never would have gone out looking for had it not come to me in a dream. Round 5 of dreams. I forgot some earlier stuff but my memory starts with me in a bathroom. Then thinking of responding to a question that was posted. I became lucid somehow. I had some thoughts of morality within dreams. Then I was running down the main road in my town, as a human, but on all fours. I picked up this little case of Pokemon cards along the side of the road, and looked at them as I ran. Running in the dream felt cool and stabilizing. Most of the cards I just passed through, but this amazing 440 H P Raikou with all gold grid on the card caught my eye. I stopped and looked at it. One of the move slots said to wake up and write down the dream so far, then come back. So I figured I would do that. Maybe some other stuff happened. Not sure. Then I had a false awakening of using my voice recorder. only it was not working properly and I started to panic. As the voice recorder kept giving me problems, I panicked more and more. I got a horrible sinking feeling that I had lost it all. I was so relieved when I awoke in my physical bed for real. Notes. I thought these dreams were excellent. Really enjoyed them. I had a conversation with the "dream intelligence" as I fell asleep that I think led to some really top notch dreams. Basically telling my dreams how much I care about them and such.
2017, 11-03 Pull the Demon From Inside I remember dream. It started out that I was with Alicia at her house. We were looking through stuff they got at a yard sale. There are old purses, books, wallets, and other crap. I start looking through the wallets. Alicia and her mom want to know if any of them are in good enough shape to resell. I open one wallet and find lots of money was left in the wallet by accident. I figure it is not Alicia’s, not her mothers, so whoever finds it first gets to keep it. I take the money out of the wallet and slip it into my pocket. Alicia apparently she thinks I’m going to spend the night tonight. I am OK with that until she mentions that she has to get up at 4 o’clock the next morning. She and her mother are going on a trip, and they have to get a really early start. I tell her if she’s getting up at 4 o’clock in the morning I won’t be spending the night. She seems surprised and disappointed. She says I will have to take care of her pets. She hands me a little cage that has both a hamster and a gerbil in. They are both very cute. I go outside to find my car, but it is not there. I look around and find out someone has moved it and it is now parked on Alicia’s front lawn. I realize I forgot something, so I go back in the house to get it. When I go through the door the entire dream changes. I am now in a long narrow hallway. It is so dark, the shadows seem almost solid. This is not Alicia‘s house. I walk down the hall, not sure where to go. I pinch my nose and find I can still breathe. I am dreaming. The hall seems to go on forever. I finally reach a room at the end of it. There is a woman in the room. She turns and looks at me. It’s like there’s a shadow over her. She tells me welcome to the nightmare. I tell her it is a dream, but no nightmare. I tell her it is my waking existence that is the nightmare. She laughs, although there’s no mirth in it. It sounds weird. I remember what I am here to do. I have to use a song to get a demon out of this woman, it’s Asuka. I had been thinking about a song by Device called Penance, so I use it. “I can make the nightmare go away, I can pull the demon from inside. I can make the nightmare go away, and save you from this and endless night.” Asuka, stands there and listens. Her eyes turn weird. They turn a solid black as if they were empty holes that lead oblivion. When the song is over, she speaks again. She is not talking in her own voice. It is a weird gravely evil voice, and it says that if I think that is going to bring it out then I am a fool. But I don’t see any reason to sit here and argue with a demon. I have another song in mind. “I came here by day, I left here in darkness, and found you. Found you on the way. And now, it is silver and silent. It is silver and cold. You in somber resplendence I hold.” The song is called Silver and Cold, and it is by a band called AFI. That stands for A Fire Inside. The demon woman just looks mildly amused at this new song. I continue it. “Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one, your sins into me. As a rapturous voice escapes I will tremble a prayer, and I beg for forgiveness. Your sins into, your sins into me. Oh my beautiful one.” The demon just repeats that it’s not going to work, but it’s voice sound distant and Hollow. So I just continue the song. “Light, like a flood her with wings, I feel your hollow voice rushing into me as your longing to sing. So I, I will paint you in silver. I will wrap you in cold. I will lift up your voice as I fall. Your sins into me, oh my beautiful one.” It looks like there is a dark cloud trying to tear out of Asuka, it is holding on, but it it’s not going to hold on for long. “I’ll fall asleep for you, I only ask you turn away. I’ll fall asleep for you, I only ask you turn, as it leaves into me, my beautiful one. Your sins into me.” So now I absorb the whole dark cloud out of Asuka and into me. It feels bitterly cold, but beyond that I don’t notice any effect. Asuka seems worried that I pulled it into myself. I tell her that this will not be a problem, because my soul already belongs to Jesus. The light energy will purge it out. This song is What I’ve Done by Linkin Park. “Let mercy come, and wash away what I’ve done. I faced myself, to cross out what I’ve become. Erase myself, and let go of what I’ve done. I’m for given what I’ve done.”
2017, 10-30 The Exorcism of Asuka I am in a house that I do not recognize. I look around to try to figure out where I am. The house basically looks normal, except it is dark. The shadows are darker than they should be. I also don’t like the feeling I get while I’m here. Like something is watching me. I start looking around to figure out what is going on. I leave what looks like the living room and go into a kitchen. I still don’t recognize it. I hear a strange noise from behind me. A strange noise, weird clicking noise like I heard first on the movie called The Grudge. The sound is creepy, but I want to know what is making it. It sounds like it is in the living room where I just left. I go back into the living room. Now the shadows seem even darker. And some of them are moving. One of them moves and grows and takes shape. It takes the form of a woman crawling on the floor. She is the one making the Grudge noises. And she also seems to be able to turn her head at a completely unnatural angle. I am thinking that maybe she needs healing. I remember thinking that in the movie The Grudge only the ghost of the husband was evil, the others were corrupted by his evil. They got corrupted when he murdered them. So now would be a perfect time to purge that darkness out of her. As she gets closer to me, instead of running out of the room like a lot of people do, I focus on the song Touch My Heart from the Devil Hunter soundtrack. The music plays in the room, and pillar of light energy surrounds the Grudge woman. She seems to float off the ground as if the energy was lifting her. The light energy from this song also purges the shadows from every corner of the room. And I have a feeling that the light energy doesn’t stop there, it is cleaning out the entire area. As the song ends, the woman is set gently back down on the ground. For a minute she is still laying there, and I cannot see her face. I am hoping that she is OK. I go over to help her if she needs it, and when she looks at me I recognize her now. Now she looks like Asuka. She gets up off the floor looking rather confused. I ask her if she’s OK? She says yes, she is. She says she just… and hesitates here… tripped. I wonder if she has no recollection of acting like the Grudge woman. I ask her if she remembers that, or if she remembers my song. She says I just got there. She looks around and says the place looks dirty. I tell her it might need some more cleansing. She was going totally Grudge woman around here. She doesn’t seem to know what I’m talking about. I’m wondering if it is gone, or if it just retreated? I am thinking she might need another healing spell. Just to be sure. I focus on the song Full Moonlight this time. This is also from the Devil Hunter soundtrack. This song creates a glowing orb in the center of the room, it looks like the moon. Size of this orb expands and fills the room. It then continues to expand beyond that. It is not solid, so it has no effect on the physical objects or people in the room. Once the song is over I noticed that the room looks a lot better. It looks as if someone has just given it a really good cleaning. I ask Asuka if she’s feeling OK? She pauses for a bit, and then says she is. She says she’s feeling OK, just a little tired. I comment that she might need some rest after having that dark energy in her. She says that might be a good idea. She turns to go upstairs, and about the same time I wake up.
Updated 10-31-2017 at 07:21 PM by 27700 (Fix a typo)
2017, 10-09 Woman of Shadows I am in a house I don’t recognize. It looks like a haunted house of some kind. I also have the idea I need to find someone in there. I start exploring. Everything is creepy, there are strange noises all around me and I keep seeing shadows out of the corner of my eye that are moving but seem to disappear when I look right at them. I am also hearing strange whispering that I can’t quite understand. I’m not sure if the whispering isn’t loud enough or if it’s in a foreign language. I enter a living room with a couch and a flat screen television. The television has static on it with strange voices coming from it like some half received station. There is a couch there and I see a woman standing in shadow over near a doorway. She looks up at me and has a really strange looking grin on her face. In an instant she is then directly in front of me as if she’s trying to scare me. When I don’t scare she gets a scowl on her face and disappears with a loud shriek. I know who I think that was… it has been Asuka, but either she was taking Halloween too seriously or something was seriously wrong. I call out to her, telling her to come back and I will help her. I get no response so I keep searching. I go down a long hallway with mirrors that do not reflect me, instead they show weird creatures crawling on the floors, walls, and ceiling of the hallway. I can’t tell what they are. I form a little ball of light energy around my hand and then use the mirror to reach out and touch the spot where one of the creatures is. There is a shriek of pain and it disappears as if it was burned. I continue down the hall and the door at the end opens on its own. I go through and it slams closed behind me. Now I see cloaked images all around me, floating around in circles around me. I think it’s supposed to be disorienting, but I gather a sphere of light energy and they all disappear as if they were nothing more than shadows. There’s another hall, and there is strange writing on the walls in glowing paint. I don’t recognize the words or symbols though somehow I know it’s supposed to be a warning. I ignore that an continue, calling out to Asuka still. I enter an office at the end of this hall and Asuka is standing in the middle of the room… sort of. She looks more like a poorly received television signal or a glitched computer graphic. She doesn’t even seem to see me at all. She is looking around as if we were surrounded by something I can’t see. I go over to Asuka and take hold of her hand, now she notices me. I focus healing light energy through her and that makes the strange glitched effect go away. No she is standing here with me and really seeing me as if for the first time tonight. She says the demon’s name is Valek. When I look puzzled she says that’s the demon’s name, and having its name will give us power over it. Asuka points to a black spot on the floor in the middle of the room and says that’s where the corruption begins. I call out the name Valek and command the demon to show itself. The demon appears above the circle looking really pissed. Asuka says he’s angry, but I can already see that. The demon looks a little like a bull with fire coming from its nostrils and it is glaring at me. I tell the demon to be gone from here and never return. Valek says I do not belong here. I say the demon is the one that doesn’t belong here… and now this ends. I use the song Enter Sandman by Metallica to create a vortex of light energy around the demon and ends with a large explosion of light energy that banishes all shadows in the room and passes through the walls to cleanse what’s outside. I look over at Asuka and she smiles before I wake up.
Morning of October 7, 2017. Saturday. Dream #: 18,555-02. Reading time: 2 min 20 sec. Before my dream, in waking life, I repeated an affirmation, “I invite the infinite healing power of Universal Mind into all areas of our bodies” (alternating with “my body”). Consider how a car is an extension of the imaginary physicality of the dream state and how “power” becomes “powder” (which has occurred with previous dreams). Another alteration is how my dreaming experience transformed my headphones (used for affirmations) into an intoxicating clamshell. After entering the dream state, I allow my conscious awareness to fade for the affirmation to predominate. The affirmation seems to become a string attached to the front bumper of a Matchbox car. (I sometimes use an imaginary rope to pull myself into or out of the dream state.) The Matchbox car is a 1930s convertible. At times, I mentally cause it to become a full-sized automobile. I rapidly drive in an unknown big city while there is a focus on possibly being stopped for speeding. However, the police are always going in the opposite direction. Later, I shrink the car to its Matchbox size and carry it to a wharf. The wharf is at the side of a road where a ladder leads down to a small platform adjacent to a commercial building. An unknown black man is here as well as Zsuzsanna. An unfamiliar woman asks if she can borrow my Matchbox car to sail across the ocean. I cause it to become large enough for her to fit in it, but I place it on a raft. I realize it may not be stable enough, so I tell her I do not think it is a reliable way to travel. Curiously, my hand seems to be as big as the raft as I test its buoyancy and how much weight it can hold. I stand on the side of the road, and the man wants to borrow my car. I whistle for it, and it arrives as a Matchbox car from the other side of town but grows to full size. He gives me a roll of one-dollar notes. When he returns, I feel I should give him something. I hand him the handwritten affirmation (without realizing what it is) that had been in my wallet. I give him some other documents that feature unusual writing and symbols. I enter a cave with the essence of a room in a house. A tunnel, like a long hallway, leads to its entrance. I whistle for my Matchbox car and notice the end of the string near the mouth of my cave. I pull my Matchbox car into the cave using the string. I see an opening in the cave wall to the left of the entrance. I find several ancient artifacts and fossils. One is a ritual clamshell that generates an intoxicating “healing powder” that cavemen used. I slap the clamshell against my ears to become intoxicated, feeling bliss, and comfort. As I am sitting on the cave’s floor, a shadowy caveman figure approaches, though he is more like an ancient ape with a manlike essence. He briefly touches me on the shoulder and knee and has a positive presence. He is like a benevolent spirit or an ancient ghost who goes to another part of the cave. Steve Johnson (a classmate from years ago), and at least three other people, walk through the hallway into my cave. I tell them about the artifacts and “healing powder” and ask if they would like to improve their minds and bodies with it.
Updated 06-15-2020 at 06:50 PM by 1390
2017, 10-05 Mystery Raiders I am on a beach, though I’m not sure where I am. I walk along the beach for a short distance, but I don’t get a chance to think much about the situation before I hear gunshots not far away. The sounds are coming from the opposite direction from where I was heading, so I turn around and hurry in the opposite direction. The beach is mostly straight so soon I see some people up ahead on the beach. There is more gunfire, I see some people that seem to be attacking, a single man is taking cover behind some rocks and picking attackers off one by one, and there appears to be a body on the ground not far away from the man, also behind the large rock. There also seems to be a door standing there on the beach all by itself, a door that couldn’t possibly lead anywhere but I’m sure it does. The door is standing open, but all I can see through it is darkness. I go up in the hills off to my right to keep from being seen as I get closer to see what is going on. When I get up on a hill overlooking the fight below. I can now more clearly assess the situation. The man who has been shooting is MoSh. He is using a pair of ancient looking guns that make a sound that could be heard from miles away every time one fires. The dead man is Roland from the Dark Tower books… but he’s not dead, I can see he is breathing though he doesn’t look too good. He looks sick, maybe on the brink of death. The people… if they are people… attacking them are the strangest thing going on here. They are completely concealed within cloaks and look like overgrown Jawas from Star Wars movies. Also, they have what look like guns, but the guns make no sound when they fire. I can only tell one has fired when a chunk of the rock MoSh is taking cover behind explodes. Each shot MoSh makes takes out one of the strange attackers, but there seem to be so many of them. Each of the enemies also turns to a black dust when the body hits the ground, conveniently leaving nothing by which to discern what they are. Then I see more of them coming out the strange door. MoSh sees that, too, and is almost close enough to reach out and close the door... but not quite. He would be exposed for too long. Ok, so a distraction is in order. I move a bit farther away from the door and come down in a place that would make the attackers turn away from the door and MoSh. They don't seem to notice me at first. I call out to them, "Hey! Are all of you so craven that you can't even show your faces? Or are you so ugly that you're really doing us a favor by hiding?" That gets their attention. They turn towards me and aim their weapons at me. MoSh calls out that I don't want to get shot, do I? I call back that this is a dream, I'm not worried about getting shot. I form my left arm into an Alex Mercer shield as I see an enemy make a movement to fire. I hear no sound until I hear the sound of an impact on my shield that has a surprising amount of force behind it. And after the physical impact there is a wave of dark energy that flows over me... these guys play dirty! I stabilize the dark energy as I wonder exactly what these enemies are... dark energy wielding Jawas on steroids? I see MoSh is taking advantage of the distraction to reach the door and close it... but it won't close! I add a telekinetic push to the door to help MoSh out, but it still won't move. Shit... Roland probably opened the door, so he probably has to close it... I distract the enemies with a couple bolts of lightning through Metallica's Battery while MoSh gets back to cover and then I quickly join him. More enemies are coming out the door to take the place of the ones I hit with lightning, MoSh plugs two of them before they even set foot on the beach. They fall on top of each other and then turn to dust. MoSh says the door wouldn't budge. I say Roland probably opened it, he probably has to close it. MoSh says good luck with that... can I heal him? He motions to Roland's motionless body. I go over to Roland and look at him. The heat of a fever is coming off of him in waves. I reach for his right arm and I see that his right hand, while whole, is badly swollen and an angry red color. I take hold of the hand and focus healing energy through Roland. MoSh says I'd better hurry, he's almost out of ammo. Roland seems to wake up from a fever dream and he reaches for his guns, which are missing. He then seems to recognize me. He looks over at MoSh and says he'd half thought seeing MoSh had been a dream. I tell Roland he has to close the door since he opened it. Roland says the door was a trap, a fake. I say yes, but he still has to close it. He struggles to his feet and then drops immediately as he is being shot at. I tell Roland MoSh and I will cover him as he closes the door. This time when Roland moves from behind the rock towards the door I call more lightning and MoSh quickly shoots several more enemies. Roland closes the door, preventing more enemies from coming. MoSh and I make quick work of the few enemies remaining. The door closes with a resounding crash, and I barely have time to see it is emblazoned with the word "VOID" before it falls to the beach looking like just a large piece of driftwood. Roland asks if MoSh or I know who those strange things were. Humans don't turn to dust upon death... I tell him someone is setting traps around, but I don't know who or why yet. MoSh looks like he is about to say something but instead he disappears. I tell Roland to only open doors saying, "The Prisoner," "The Lady of Shadows," or "The Pusher." I know those to be real. Before he can say anything in reply I wake up.
2017, 09-21 The Dark Tower – Healing on the Beach I am on a beach that somehow looks familiar. It reminds me of the beach that I used to focus on in my bedtime meditations to trigger lucid dreams. I walk down the beach just enjoying the feel of the ocean breeze, the sound of the birds, and the sound of the water. I haven’t gone far before I notice there is a man walking down the beach in my direction as if he was drunk. He also looks like he might be a bum, he is filthy and his clothes are all ripped up. I am about to continue on my way when I see him collapse. I figure even if he is a drunk, he might be in trouble and need help. I head in his direction. I see him reaching clumsily for a gun at his side but his arm doesn’t seem to be able to grasp it. The effort seems to be the last energy he had left and he passes out. When I get closer to the man I see the reason he had been unable to draw his weapon. His right hand is wrapped in a dirty, blood drenched scrap of cloth. That doesn’t look good. I also see that there is the redness of infection making its way up his arm. I will help with that. While he is unconscious I carefully remove the filthy cloth and see that the hand is missing two fingers. No wonder it is bloody and infected. I focus healing energy through the man’s hand. Light energy surrounds the wounded hand and glows brightly for a bit and then is absorbed into the man’s body. The hand is now whole again. The red of infection is also gone from that spot. The man seems to recover some and he wakes up. He turns suddenly towards me and has his gun out in an instant but he doesn’t pull the trigger. The man knows me, and I recognize him. He calls me Raven and I recognize him as Roland Deschain from the Dark Tower books. He realizes with some shock that he’s holding his gun in his right hand. I tell him he was injured somehow but I healed his hand. He asks how I did that, am I a sorceress? I tell him I’m a healer, using the light energy to do good. I ask if he is injured anywhere else. He said a lobstrocity bit off a toe from his right foot and took a chunk of meat from his right calf… I carefully remove the ratty boot from his right foot and heal the missing toe and then the injury in his leg. Now Roland is feeling much better and he stands up. Roland wants to know how I found him here. I tell him my dream state takes me wherever I need to be. I look at one of his water skins and see it is empty, so I use the Harry Potter spell aguamente to fill it with fresh water. The other skin is nearly empty so I fill it as well. Roland says this is no dream. I say that for him it is real, but dreams are how I travel to the other worlds and for me this is a dream. Roland thanks me for filling his water skins and asks me if I happen to have any bullets on me, most of his took a wetting in the ocean. I don’t think I have any ammunition. Roland says he hopes I’m not hungry because he doesn’t have any food left. I am thinking to create some food for him but I don’t get a chance to do that before I wake.
2017, 06-22 Healing Rain I am in a beautiful garden. The sun is shining and it is a beautiful day out. I briefly think it was expected to be so very hot, but it’s not. I conclude that the garden with the trees and flowers and flowing stream is keeping the area cool somehow. Without giving that any more consideration I begin wandering through the garden. I see there is a woman in the garden with me. She is a pretty Japanese woman wearing a kimono and she is tending to some of the flowers. She looks over at me and acts surprised to see me. She says she wasn’t expecting company and doesn’t have any cookies. When I give her a puzzled look she says she is Asuka and this is a dream, I should do a reality check if I don’t believe her. So I pinch my nose and find I can still breathe… this is a dream! Once I’m lucid Asuka says she doesn’t know where MoSh is. I tell her my goal was to come here and heal her anyhow whether MoSh is around or not. She looks a bit puzzled and says she feels fine, but healing energy never causes any harm so go ahead. I focus on the song Voices from the Macross Plus soundtrack and light energy surrounds and flows through Asuka. I am wishing there was some way to keep her from getting infected with any unstable energy, and then I feel rather stupid for not thinking of it sooner. I reach into my white Assassin robes and pull out a Witchblade bracelet. I hand it to Asuka and tell her to keep it on, it will protect her. She takes it and slips it on her left wrist. She says it’s pretty. I say I can’t believe we hadn’t thought to give it to her sooner. Asuka goes towards the house and says I can meet up with MoSh when he gets into the dream. I look around outside the house but I don’t see MoSh. I go through the house and out in front and look around. I see MoSh outside on the sidewalk petting a dog. I call his name but he doesn’t seem to hear me. I head over towards him and tell him this is a dream. The dog is holding something that MoSh seems to be trying to get hold of. I can’t see what it is. I go over closer to MoSh and I hear him talking to the dog, telling the dog to drop it. The dog gets up and trots down the street. I am about to call to MoSh again but he heads down the street following the dog. I am about to follow him but I wake up before I get more than a few steps down the street.
2017, 06-14 A Song of Healing I am at a mall with my mother. It’s similar to a mall in my local area, but not exact. I know I have been to this mall before, however, in previous dreams. No thought that I might be dreaming occurs to me now. My mom and I are going into a clothing store and looking for some new clothes for me for work. I look around but I can’t find anything I like that will actually fit me. So we leave and head for the theater at the mall where there is a live performance of Harry Potter, and the author J.K. Rowling is even going to be in attendance for this presentation. We go to the theater and wait in line to go inside. Once inside I see J.K. Rowling surrounded by people asking for her autograph. I also see someone I don’t want to see… so instead of waiting to try to get J.K. Rowling’s autograph I pull my mom into the theater to get a good seat, or that’s the reason I give her for my hurry. In the theater there are already quite a few people seated so my mom and I pick a spot. I look around and see quite a few people with popcorn and I think that would be good, but the person after me knows my mom and might see her if she goes for popcorn so I say I don’t want any when she asks. People keep coming into the theater and I watch carefully to see if the man outside is coming in. I don’t see him. I look to the front of the theater and I see a different man looking at me. He clearly recognizes me. And somehow I know he works for the man who is looking for me. I look to my mom but she is gone. Another man comes over and says to remain calm. He says he’s a friend and will make sure I get out of here safely. He gives a dirty look at the man up front who is watching me. The man beside me looks under my seat and finds poison darts. He asks the man watching us what the poison would do to me. He says it would land me in the emergency room. I say it would be lethal if I drank all four of them. The man beside me says no, don’t talk like that. Another man, a fat man in an oversized t-shirt, comes over and takes one of the darts from the man beside me. He says he hasn’t tried this yet, and breaks the cartridge open and drinks some of the fluid inside. He looks like he’s getting high off of it. I look back at the man beside me and then I hear a woman a couple rows back let out a cry. I look just in time to see J.K. Rowling collapse in shock. I look to see what she saw and I see the man who drank the poison now has no nose, it looks like it melted off his face, but he looks higher than ever. The man beside me urges me to get out of here. I head out of the theater but on the way I lose track of him, and then I am in the hall of the mall alone. I head down the hall, looking for a bathroom. I open a door and find myself in someone’s house. A woman is there and she looks pissed at me. I think she is pissed because I just walked into her house, so I turn to leave but the door to the mall is gone. The woman starts yelling at me and demanding to know if I’m sleeping with him. I ask who. She says MoSh, of course! She says I’ve been fucking him, haven’t I?! I tell her MoSh wouldn’t want to get involved with me, I’m too old for him. Then I realize what is happening… this must be Asuka, I was going to heal her! I focus on the song Voices from the Macross Plus soundtrack. Light energy flows through Asuka and she calms down. She says she doesn’t know why she said what she did. I tell her it was unstable negative energies. I am about to say more but everything fades to black and I wake up.
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