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I dreamt Jed and I were sitting on the couch, cuddling, and watching tv. I turned to look at him and I noticed there was a small spider on his earlobe just laying there. I shuddered in my dream but didn't say anything. I remember thinking that the spider was odd for just choosing to lay on his earlobe. As I turned back to the tv I woke up.

I'm going to try to explain this dream to the best of my abilities, but I don't remember all the details.
First, I need to tell you how i recalled this dream, as i feel like it might be pretty significant, or not significant at all...

So, I either had this dream last night or the night before, I can't remember because, i forgot about it. Like completely forgot about this dream.
Anyways, I just got a new dream-catcher, and I was trying to figure out where to put it, and if i should do something with my other one.

Basically, I found myself looking in to articles about dream-catchers. As i was reading one article; and glancing at my dream-catcher on my wall, the articles listed something with the word "spider."
And then i remembered the dream. Not necessarily that i had the dream, but like i remembered something happened with a spider very recently, then i remembered it was a giant spider(Like the size of a big dog), and that it was talking, Then, i remembered that spiders don't talk and are not huge, so i must have dreamed of this spider!
It was just so odd that reading about dream-catchers, and then seeing the word "spider," caused me to remember this strange dream.

So onto the dream.
Now, i don't remember much of the dream but basically, I was in my house, and i'm pretty sure my family or one of my family members was there as well.
I was in my house and this giant spider appeared.
Now, it wasn't a naturally big spider, It was big like the size of a big dog, maybe taller.
She had really long legs, which took up the majority of her height, and i'm not sure what type of spider she was. She was eiither a Daddy Longlegs, or a black widow. I'm more certain she was a daddy longlegs, because in the dream i considered a daddy longlegs, but i could be wrong?
Anyways, we were, or i was, freaked out that she was there, and debating whether to kill her.
As we thought it through, i was thinking to myself that if i didn't kill her and let her stay, she would protect me from other insects.
I'm not sure if she mentioned this throughout the dream or if it was just me thinking about it, but i know i had that feeling.
I also read that when spiders talk in your ream that you need to listen to their message carefully, but i don't remember what she said. Maybe she was saying that?
I just know that my instinct was that if i don't kill her, then she'll protect me from the other insects.
I don't know if we actually killed her or not, I don't think we did...

So, I just want to know, who could this spider really be? and, who are these "insects" i need protection from? Could they be people in my life, and she's a angelic being sending me a message that she's trying to protect me from these people?
Could the spider really be bad, and trying to manipulate me?

I looked into what the meaning of spider dreams are, and some of the interpretations make sense, in what i'm going through in life right now. But, i feel like this dream had more to it. Like the scenario was a message about something more specific?

I don't even know if all of this made sense, but i hope you guys understood it enough.

Also, i want to point out that this isn't the first dream about an animal i've had, but i'll explain that more if I tell you about my other dream.

I’m walking out on my deck
I start walking down the steps
But my eyes wouldn’t open completely
I see spider webs
I walk through one
Near the bottom I see whispy webs
Then I had a moment where I was out of my timeline
I thought about those floating webs that float through the air
Those thoughts became a reality
And they had landed on the steps and grass
I say i was out of time because they were suddenly just there
Then my eyes decided to close completely
I didn’t want to see if there were spiders 🕷
I ran across the grass towards the bottom of my garden
But I thought perhaps I had gotten off track?
I believed I was heading towards the Cherry tree
I managed to open my eyes a little
I see branches and twigs
I can’t stop myself from going into the tree
I feel nothing though
I’m so close, that it shocks me awake

I had this dream during an afternoon nap. I’m trying to work out what it could mean. I’m waking life I am petrified of spiders, even though I didn’t actually see one in my dream, just white floating webs landing on the stairs and grass.

It's been too long since I've updated this. Hoping to get a bit more on track this summer.

Dream 1: I remember being really itchy during this dream, and I found that the reason why I was itchy was because a spider was crawling on me. ._____. The creepy thing was that I woke up and was still itching. Thankfully, no spiders to be seen. xD

Dream 2: This one was kinda cool. I was walking around with a bunch of my friends from school, on campus, including a TA from Film which I took a few semesters ago. One of the guys there asked me how my slipping was going, and I was really confused until we stepped off of the path. I then saw all the ICE that was all over campus, even though it was sunny and summer. The ice was pretty dirty and gross, and some of it was transparent-ish so that you could see some of the grass underneath. In order to walk on it, I tried flying, but I could only fly for short bursts at a time for some reason. Then, I had to land again, and there was the risk of slipping upon landing. So I settled for this awkward hop-slide method, where I alternated short flying and sliding on my butt. We were heading towards a large tree for some reason, at the edge of a field (said tree does not exist IRL).

Then there were these ducks we slid by, and they were all dead. o_o My campus has a lot of ducks, but they are usually, you know, not dead. One of them was cut open, and instead of blood and guts, it was filled with black beads. Weird stuff.

I was very close to being lucid, considering that I knew that I could fly, but I did not consciously recognize that I was in a dream.

HH

Had some semi lucid Hypnagogic imagery of a woman in a creepy mask with nothing but black pupils.

Creepy

Vague memory of the woman being in my room. She is shrouded in black smoke and almost resembles a spider. She is sticking a tube in my chest and feeding the black smoke through it. Or maybe it's more like spider silk sticking into me.


All other dreams almost reached the surface but were pushed away by a black cloud.

I have to search for certain artifacts in a fantasy world. Eventually I have to get an artifact by going through a giant spider web guarded by a white spider. I run away from it so much that the dream loses its plot and turns in to a dream about getting on trams and trains.

Morning of October 17, 2016. Monday.



The time seems to be early afternoon in all the outdoor scenes. In the first scene I am in our residence but I am not sure where it is implied to be. Our youngest son Oliver has a large terrarium that extends from floor to ceiling though it looks like an aviary. It is directly in the corner of the left side of the room, about two and a half feet square. He seems cheerful. Zsuzsanna is concerned about him seeing the turtle he had brought home the day before. I look in and notice that the turtle seems propped against the back of the cage on the right. It is on its right side and a bite had seemingly been taken out of it, shell and all, probably by another animal in the cage. I am not sure what to do with it but Oliver does not notice.

My attention falls on weird animals in the cage. There are a few spiders with black disk-like bodies, the bodies of which are almost as big as my fist, though their legs are nearly three feet long. The legs are thin and closely paired so that it looks like they have four legs instead of eight. One seems positioned head down, its legs on two different large branches so that I mostly view it from the top of its body. I look to the right side and notice that the cage, at least on that side, is designed more like the front of a jail cell with the bars sparse enough for any of the animals to easily leave the cage. The side facing me does not seem of this appearance. I comment on how they could get out, but it does not bother me that much.

In the second scene, the personified preconscious appears as an unknown male of about my age and is presently sitting in another area of the room, though does not yet attain a more dominant presence. I watch three mole crickets crawling about on a pillow. Two are their natural color but the smallest of the three, in the middle, is pure white. I reflect on the idea of them possibly crawling on a person in their sleep, but there is not that much concern. A mole cricket is a tertiary dream sign that symbolizes going deeper into sleep in real-time, two of them symbolizing Zsuzsanna and I but the white one in the middle representing moon induction (circadian rhythms factor) and shared dreaming on the spiritual level as analogous to the Blue Pearl event (inviolable telepathy between soulmates, specifically twin flames as Zsuzsanna and I are).

The personified preconscious points to an unrealistically large detached crab spider head facing us from the right side of a pillow across the room on a bed perpendicular to the bed I had been looking at near the center of the room. “Something should be done about that head on the pillow,” he says. Despite this incredibly obvious dream sign of him directly exposing his role as the personified preconscious, my dream self remains completely clueless and no lucidity is triggered.

In the next scene, we end up in a small dimly lit room which has the essence of liminal space (even though I am not near waking yet). He sits on a wooden chair while I seem to sit cross-legged on the floor. I am facing him as he talks about money but he seems sarcastic about a certain business I do not know the name of (although he had apparently said it a few times but my dream self remains unaware of some of what he says). He seems to mimic advertisements and promotional gimmicks. “Make lots of money,” he says, mocking the original supposed speaker and waving his arms around seemingly in frustration. “Have you heard of Amway?” I ask him after watching and listening to his routine for several minutes. He glares at me as if I am unbelievably stupid and had not heard a word he had said, as Amway is apparently what he had been talking about all that time. I feel embarrassed but try to explain that I had heard him, though my pretense is not very convincing.

In the next scene I find myself near an intersection having apparently mowed our front lawn recently. My (fictional) house is on the street that is perpendicular from where I am standing near a bus stop. I contemplate how I have to mow this whole area, but after a short time, I realize that it is not my responsibility and the city council will do it at a later date. Despite being near the bus stop, I am not interested in (subliminally) shifting consciousness. However, five young people get off. They do not regard me at this time.

Despite my cursory faux memory and brief acknowledgement of my dream house (which seems vaguely based on the Loomis Street house though the rest of the area is not as such), I soon go into the backyard of our present house, though the gate is on the wrong side; at the north end of the fence near the southwest corner of our house instead of the south end near the northwest corner of our shed. A young unfamiliar black woman, who seems to be a teacher, is there with Zsuzsanna. Zsuzsanna has seemingly been given something that was stealthily taken from the personified preconscious. It seems conspiratorial. There are apparently two batches of mail-order pills. I take the two packages from Zsuzsanna’s left hand. One of them is a C4 manila envelope (yellow) padded with bubble-wrap and the other is a white C8 envelope with lesser bubble wrap. I open the larger package to find that it contains several cylindrical prescription bottles of pills of some kind. (None of us take prescription pills in real life.) There is also a receipt. I look at it and read it closely. “These pills cost eighty-six dollars a fortnight,” I say, seeing the total price listed as $86.00 under $79.95 and the shipping and handling fee of $6.05. “It's eighty-six.”

I fail to recall that eighty-six is the number implemented when the personified preconscious gives up on my non-lucid dream self (having “eighty-sixed me”), thus no coalescence, implicit or not, at the waking stage. This is validated by the fact it comes in the mail, which represents communication between dream self and whole conscious self identity.

The preconscious essence flows into the five children (and I do not focus on the fact that we have five children although these children are unfamiliar) who had gotten off the bus earlier and so naturally they approach our home to impose upon us to try to get me to either wake or become lucid. Zsuzsanna and I are sitting on chairs outside of our fence, our backs to it, our youngest daughter and youngest son sitting between us (which is not something we had ever actually done). A boy somehow throws a large mattress fairly high into the air above our heads (probably subliminally associated with our youngest son now sleeping on the top bunk of a bunk bed), but it misses us in coming down, landing immediately to Zsuzsanna’s right. I get the impression that he had been trying to throw the mattress over our fence (beyond liminal space and out of the immediate level of consciousness). I still do not grasp such an obvious dream sign. “Are you trying to kill someone…such as a baby?” I yell angrily at the boy.

The entire orientation soon changes without a clue on my part. We are now all in our backyard on our side of the fence yet the five children (who must have teleported with us) are now leaving through the gate, the boy somehow carrying the mattress again (which does not at all resolve logically from a conscious viewpoint since he is seemingly carrying it on his right side as he would a textbook). I am so angry that I decide to follow them. As soon as I step outside of the gate, my consciousness shifts into the waking stage and I realize I had been had.

Aside from the reacquiring flying and falling dreams which I do not like to talk about there are my dreams with animals. These get forgotten very quickly because I do not give them too much meaning.

1. Crocodiles in the living room.
In this dream I have thousands of crocodiles and alligators down in the living room. I run many times down to the kitchen to get things to my brother but once I slip and almost get eaten by the animals. I do not have a fear of alligators and their cousins, I do not live in a place here I could ever meet them. I remember joking about the situation to my friends through the phone and they too visited me in my dream - although I do not remember if it was at the first part or at the last part - and dodges the crocodiles skillfully to get to the floor we were on. But in the end it was me who needed to get food from the kitchen and run. That's when I slip. I almost died because of my friends.

2. Giant spider.
At the top of the stairs there is a little hall that divide the two upstairs rooms. In this dream my house is accurate, and since it was made by my father it has nothing that resembles the stereotypical house structure. That's how many rooms are in the top floor, two bedrooms and a hall dividing them. My brother and I need to go through from one room to another but the way is blocked by a giant spider that leaves little room to move in the square hall. But it is docile and I feel the abdomen brushing to my stomach as i squeeze through the spider. Disgusting.

My husband was seeing someone else. We were polyamorous but I was unhappy. He and a woman and some other friends went to comedy show without me. I was devastated.
Walking down street trying to get to apt 4 at night. Raining? My best friend from high school [C] was my roommate but moving back to Europe with a grant to write something. We never talked although we lived together.

I was at a class– Spelling? Woman with baby used buzzer instead if clapping for asking questions. My husband and his girlfriend were in class before me
I told his gf how unhappy I was after I talked to my husband and asked him if it had to be this way. No one cared about my feelings.

My dog was locked in a room. It had a glass window, like recording booth. I somehow got her out and she turned into a large grey spider. I wanted her to change back, so I held onto her. Someone else there saw her and recognized bug as a 'world burther.'

Thought I saw my husband in a red [unreadable] with a baby going, to a show in a crowd of people. I ran up and hugged him but it wasn't him.

A strange man told me to come to the show to watch out for my husband. I began thinking I might divorce him. I thought about asking my parents if I could move in with them. I thought about how I was a burden to my parents.

Driving down a winding road in a truck with some packages. Coming at me is a very large, brown, prehistoric looking spider. It’s in an 8 shape and the legs are on the front and back of its body, not the sides. It freaks me out so I swat at it but it won’t die. I learn that it’s called the Amazon spider (as in amazon.com) and hangs out in their warehouse. I get home (more like my mom’s house) and there’s a party. Donald Trump is there. I put on my shoes because I’m bored and decide to go outside to take a selfie with a giant crashed government airplane before they move it. Donald Trump bends down and starts tying my shoes for me. “Oh thank you. Could I get a picture with you?” He agrees and then hesitates. “Why do you want a picture with me? You’re only here to make fun of me.” “That’s not true! I live here. My room is right there!” I point. Really, I just wanted to share with friends and family that Donald Trump tied my shoes, because nobody would believe me otherwise. D comes just as things start falling apart. We hear that there is any army invading the other part of town and civilization starts to collapse. D has things to take care of in the house and someone asks me if I could help find certain seeds and I agree. I go to the other side of town and basically just follow this scientist around, holding items that they need to salvage before all hell breaks loose. We go into the back room of some industrial building and grab a bottle of rubbing alcohol and a toothbrush. I have to connect something to the tip of the toothbrush but I can’t because I’m shaking so bad. The political situation is worsening very quickly and I start becoming extremely upset that D and I separated. If he died while I’m gone I will never forgive myself. I would rather die with him than live without him. When we leave the room we find the building is on lockdown. All the offices are empty with the lights turned off but we hear men shouting orders in the other rooms. We quietly move through one room and hide behind a desk, looking through the glass of the door. I didn’t feel safe there and wished we were a few desks or even another room back, but we needed to see what was happening. One of the girls in the room ahead of us dropped a blue pencil and I knew that meant it was the daughter of my scientist friend. She was upset and went to save her daughter. By doing that, we learned that the invading army was a benevolent force and all of our families were safe. I was so relieved to see my husband’s face (but it wasn’t really his face). Everybody started cleaning up after all the chaos but D and I went to the gym and went swimming. I was practicing my dive, which required me to fatigue my deltoids by hanging on to the pool ladder before diving. I dove in, hit the bottom, and sprung back up in only a matter of seconds. A man said, “That was a great dive, sweetie!” D and I left to look for food. We wanted Mexican food but the best place in town was closed, so we looked around. We went to a hotel and someone we knew handed us some of our items (like area rugs) from the “drill” earlier but we just left them there.

I had a bunch of dreams last night. The most I have remembered in a while. I think it really helps that I told myself the night before that I needed to remember them so I could write them in my Dream Journal. None of them were particularly long or vivid. But I'm glad I remembered what I did.

Dream 1:

I was in my old childhood neighborhood. I saw a nearby house (one East of the school) had burned down. Then as I watched I saw a big truck some barreling down the street and smash in to the house next to it. It was quite shocking I hoped the people inside were okay since the truck took about a third of the house down.

Later I am in the house next to the two that had been destroyed. I am with a former roommate Bonna and a few freinds. I told them I had a really bad feeling about staying in this house. I was sure that this house was next to be destroyed. I finally convinced them to evacuate. It was then like a treehouse because we were climbing down a ladder. I'm pretty sure that I noticed a fire in the house as soon as were were down.

[This was inspired because I had looked up my old neighborhood on Google maps before bed.]

Dream 2:

I was walking down the street in a neighborhood near the church I went to growing up in LA. I suddenly realized that I could fly. I don't think I was lucid, yet some of my actions were similar to things I do while lucid. I flew slowly straight up in the air. I started to have trouble getting very high. I knew my trick for flying was to not push myself higher, but to make the scenery move around me. So I focused on the scenery getting lower and lower around me, and I saw that I was getting quite high. But then I found myself under some power lines. I've heard that this is a problem for some lucid dreamers, but I've only had this happen once before. I realized that I was very close to the energized lines. I could hear a buzz and feel my hair start to stand up on my head and arms.

[This was also inspired because I had looked up my old neighborhood on Google maps before bed.]

Dream 3:

I don't remember how this dream started but I found myself in a large room. I had no pants on. I think I was doing laundry. But then these guys started coming into the room to play video games. I think Kasey, Daniel, and David were there. I tried to get my pants on quickly before they noticed. I should have gotten lucid on this one.

Dream 4:

I was in a Japanese store buying what was called "noodles" but it looked more like a crumbly cake. The Japanese man who ran the store asked if I were traveling. I said, No, I was local.

Dream 5:

I went in this large kitchen. I was barefooted. I noticed something on the ground right in front of the fridge. As I looked closer I saw that someone had stepped on a tarantula. Its body had been squished, but it was still alive and trying to walk and pull it's mangled body with it. it was a horrible sight. There was a huge amount of white paste-like guts coming out the back of the spider. I wanted to kill it and put it out of its misery, but I had no shoes on and couldn't step on it. But I didn't know if I could have anyway.

[This was inspired by an incident that happened earlier that day where I found a big black widow and tried to kill it with a shovel. I only hit it's body the first time and had to give it a second whack. Hate when that happens.]

Dream 6:

I was trying to sleep. I realized that my bed was in a crowded mall or airport. I was in a smaller room that was just off the main area, but the head of my bed was right were the opening of the room connected. It gave me a weird feeling to have all these strangers walking within a few feet of my head. I thought of trying to move my bed further into the room so I wouldn't be as close. But then I started hearing what I thought was hypnagogic audio hallucinations. I could hear a man's voice clearly talking in my head. I remembered the times that I had been able to write down some of those weird things that were said in hallucinations in the past. I wanted to start writing down what I was hearing. I carefully found a pencil and paper without waking myself up completely. I started to write down what the man was still saying in my head. I no longer remember what was being said.

Dream 7:

I was starting a hike with friends. I realized that I wasn't as prepared as I thought. I didn't have on my hiking boots. I had on sandals with a pair of socks. I tried to remember where we were hiking. This could work if we were hiking through water.

Dream 8:

I was sitting with my family. My dad (who passed away many years ago) was there talking to the family. I remember feeling happy about this, but at the time I didn't realize why.

Fell asleep: 12:10 A.M. (with 50mg trazodone)
Woke up: 9:25 A.M.

9 hours 4 minutes sleep last night
7 hours 10 minutes restful sleep
1 hours 53 minutes restless sleep
79 % restful sleep

Fragment1: Something about a spider and one being behind my pillow. When I woke up, I was paranoid for all of two seconds before exhaustion said eff it and I went back to sleep.

Fragment 2: Two people talking, just in time the big dude goes into the room where the other is and closes the door as an Alien movie type creature patrols by. We were there hacking into a database, and we thought it was all good until the other (me??) looks at a terminal and sees green text and numbers (like in Matrix) flashing and I warn the guy about it. Skip. We're transported on top of a mountain-island. The details are jumbled here, but we transport off of onto another island. It seems like the mountain-island was some hard place to get to, so maybe we shouldn't have left. On this island, we realize that we have to take down these orange creatures before we can keep going.

Inspiration: The RPG event going on in Hesokuri Wars (Osomatsu-san app).

Fragment 3: Mom is looking through my mismatched socks and finds the green/white tie-dyed one. She seems to be about to throw it away, so I quickly reach out for it and explain that I want to keep it. I start to mention that the other one has a hole in it, but my mind freezes as I recall that we already had this conversation.

Inspiration: We actually did already talk about the socks but she thought it was fine to keep the one.

Fragment 4: Looking in the fridge and being surprised to see that my blue flowery cup is in there and full of water. I wonder how long it's been in there and if it tastes okay.

Wakeup times:
1:50 A.M. for 10 minutes
3:20 A.M. for a minute
4:01 A.M. for 3 minutes
4:20 A.M. for a minute
6:40 for A.M. 4 minutes
7:57 A.M. for three minutes
8:10 A.M. for 2 minutes

I remember waking up once for the spider dream, once because my cat was sleeping on my back, and once because she was rustling a bag and I sat up and saw that it was stuck on her head... I know a woke 2-3 more times for dreams but was too tired to do much about it. I stayed up a bit late reading. @_@

There was this man, fitted in a old-fashioned tuxedo, with a very white face, white gloves, and slicked back black hair. The lower half of his body is a giant spider, the chitin as slick and shiny as the silk of his waistcoat.
He's on a hardwood scene, under a very bright spotlight that glitter off the joints of his spinnery legs. He's dancing, his four eyes closed as he listens to music I can't hear. It's eerie, graceful, the tips of his legs ticking on the wooden floor like rain on a roof.

Dream
Me and a friend (I think Daniel?) are in an old Egyptian-style tomb (like something Indiana Jones would be running around in). The place is booby trapped and has puzzles, there are 2 rooms nearby and 1 is much bigger. We go into the big room only to find that the only exit is out of reach and high above us. That's stupid... How would anyone get up there? We decide to go back and step into the small room this time. There's a pit in it that takes up most of the floor, we have to skirt the edges of the room. Scary.
At the other side of the room we doing something that activates a trap I think, but also a door is opening to our right which leads into the big room. I instantly realize that this is what we're supposed to do, I grab Daniel by the arm and we run into the big room. There's a line that's descended from the opening in the ceiling, and the platform beneath is rising. We have to sprint to jump on or we'll get trapped (or something.. probably?). We jump onto the rope and climb our way up. As we near the top, we reach onto the edges to pull ourselves up, 2 sides have metal bars on them to make climbing up easier. The reason they were there was because the material used to make the edges was some poor quality plaster style like something from the early 1900s. I notice the ledge cracking and had to switch to a ledge with a bar.. Phew, that could have ended badly. Though I felt I would have been fine if I had fallen. I climbed up and we're ecstatic to have made it the room we're in is white and pristine looking (still not noticing the scene change) we run to the room on the left and then back, then to the room on the right. I'm pretty sure we made a huge mess and I told Dan that we should come back and clean it up otherwise the guy in the room lifting weights might get mad. He might be a 'gatekeeper' or something. When we went back to the room I remember there being something to do with a spider though... It was an extremely poisonous transparent white spider that somehow managed to get on me and I freaked out and woke up. I then decided to thrash around and squash any potentially real spiders that may have been crawling on me

Dream fragment
Also another dream which I can't be bothered writing up completely... Basically my face got all fucked up and disfigured, it's the most grotesque thing I've ever seen in my life. It was REALLY bad. I look in the mirror and my face had like, scrunched up.. And it had become severely pockmarked and had acne EVERYWHERE. I touched my face and it felt all crusty, and then the pimples would just explode, profusely spewing puss onto the mirror. ... I remember thinking "what the... when, HOW did this happen?" and then proceeded to just pop and pop and pop. Trying to fix my face... God it was so disgusting.
It was a good dream up until that part, I had been working on some project with school mates and there had been cute girls and stuff.
I had to check the mirror this morning and make sure that I didn't have any acne or pockmarks . Now that I think about it, my dreams had terrible endings last night :/

Morning of February 14, 2016. Sunday.

Dream #: 17,954-05. Reading time (optimized): 2 min.



In my dream, my wife Zsuzsanna and I are in a shed that may be a distorted version of our present home’s shed. There is also an unknown male character.

A trapdoor spider about four times bigger than a real one is near the doorway. It bites Zsuzsanna on her right knee, but she is soon a young version of the Erin Walton character (played years ago by Mary Beth McDonough), which puzzles my dream self in a way that alters my level of awareness.

The man holds her as she cries and sits down and he gives her an injection near her right knee with a hypodermic needle (a very rare dream prop for me), which contains the cure. It seems she will recover. I look in the doorway, and there stands the four-times-bigger trapdoor spider. I eventually understand that the spider is Kali. “She is the mighty aspect of the goddess Durga. The name of Kali means black one and force of time. She is therefore called the Goddess of Time, Change, Power, Creation, Preservation, and Destruction.” (Kali often has four arms and two legs, which makes her an “insect,” not a “spider.”)

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Zsuzsanna used to play with trapdoor spiders without knowing they were venomous (yet luckily was never bitten). Secondly, I associate Erin Walton with the petting of a deer (relating to a documentary feature about her that I saw years ago as well as the Waltons episode “The Fawn”), which was like a very similar image in a photograph Zsuzsanna sent me before we met of her feeding a deer.

Zsuzsanna’s right knee was miraculously healed (even though doctors said it could never be) when we first met and shared meditations. Although there are other layers, two are interesting and fit perfectly. One is a ghost story related to Kali as a demonic living statue (though I no longer have that comic book). On Thursday, February 14th, 1974, I saw “The Waltons” episode “The Ghost Story.” “Strange things are occurring at the Walton home. The family uses a Ouija board to ask questions about the happenings. A small boy staying at the home is to leave to meet his father. Things happen to prevent this.” The original newspaper summary: “John-Boy obtains a ‘spirit board’ which is reputed to foretell the future and to put its interrogators in touch with the psychic world. When the board appears to be delivering mysterious messages, Grandma and Olivia insist that the children stop playing with it.”

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The trapdoor spider in my dream seems associated with a Ouija board (which is dependent on the use of hands and which is what a spider also represents in some dreams in a negative context), also representing Kali, also representing “messages” in the liminal stages of sleep which have various transpersonal sources. Because my 1971 dream features doorway waking symbolism using Kali, it seems a relevant marker. On one level, it serves as a personal confirmation against so-called psychics, “dream interpreters,” or ideas from questionable sources.

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