lucid

Between July-August 2018

1st one I was driving a car towards my grandparents town. I’m sitting next to a woman talking something about lucidity when I ask my self if it’s not a dream already, I realize the feeling! I jump out of the car and start walking to a purple building close to the road. I see a blue colored butterfly while walking there, I want to explore some but I start to lose sensibility of my legs dream fade out until I wake up.

2nd one was a couple of days after, it was after an anxious dream where I have to find sort of Bus station in the old city where I used to live. I’m walking on a street next to a river. The street is at a higher level, around 20 m high. I can see the river shore from above. I’m afraid to fall down when all of the sudden came the idea if it’s a dream! i realize the feeling, I decide to jump down. Nice fall. When I reach the ground, I notice I’ve changed my shape to a sort of mixture between a Gorilla and a Yeti. I see I have white hairs. I run four legged for a while, it’s nice to feel it again I was running that way until I woke up

Night of August 30, 2018. Thursday.

Reading time: 57 sec. Readability score: 53.



Water induction brings about an association with fishing. However, in semi-lucidity, I focus on something else, and the potential fishing backstory fades along with my rod and tackle. It is a tree stump arising from the center of a lake. (It is the only feature above the surface.)

I start to conceptualize it as something important, but I am not sure of what relevance it is. I think it possibly represents old age. After a time, the water becomes lower.

Over time, I think about the tree becoming whole again, but I do not deliberately try to force the event. The water lowers to where the lake is gone. I become distracted by a shifting of awareness where I now see a bicycle rack as if a feature in an urban public park. The landscape slowly rotates around me.

---

Despite the implication of the stump being in the ground at the lake’s bottom, it stems from the Old Man of the Lake, a Crater Lake feature, which vertically floats. The bicycle rack blends the typical association of the liminal space barrier as a fence (otherwise dividing dream self and conscious self presence) with a more linear vestibular system correlation anticipated (in contrast to flight, rising, or falling), though no bicycle is present. Instead, I wake with the entire landscape slowly rotating around me (clockwise) like a bicycle wheel, in addition to water lowering waking symbolism (ultradian rhythm and decrease of melatonin).

---

Created Saturday 01 September 2018

Not quite as much as yesterday, but hey, given how tired I was, this isn't all too bad.

Scrap Group 1
In a supermarket with family. I buy a pecan pie for dessert later, and my bro gets some snack cakes for the rest. We then go to a multi-story megastore.

Driving around with my brother. I get aware. Rubbed my hands for a moment. I then tried gathering energy between my palms. Although I could feel something flowing, I couldn't actually see the results. Just then, a pretty brown haired woman appeared out of nowhere in the backseat. She snatched the invisible energy, then stared in awe as it quaked in her hands.

False awakening in bed. I have false memories (maybe?) of dreaming about my guide.

Sep 1 2018

The night started with some visualization of a dream I'm trying to incubate, which lasted probably 30 minutes to an hour. After that, I set my intentions to become lucid and headed to sleep.

My first dream of the night involved some kind of network TV teenage vampire drama plot, which took place in a neighborhood similar to mine from childhood. In the next dream, I was in a trench coat placing high-stakes bets using a 90's era cell phone. At the end of this dream, all of my cronies were in a room, facing forward in rows, and I was facing backward. We were all peeing on the ground (I think it was a power play).

Next, I'm in a huge convention center. I had just seen the newest Avengers movie (I haven't seen it IWL). I was ranting to others about how Thanos had all of the Avengers on his side and wasn't even fighting, but was just using the Avengers to fight. The convention center was huge (should've caught that, since disproportionate structures is one of my dreamsigns). We (a couple of DCs and I) were walking through the ground floor when we ran into

Spoiler for nudity:

three girls in fishnet shirts, whose nipples were poking through the fishnet. I or one of my DC friends picked the middle girl's girls up and examined them like a fine connoisseur, asking "These are same-size, no?". I remember they had a lot of moles and sort of looked cancerous? The girl on the left had red fishnet, but the other two had dark grey or black, and all of the fishnet was thick, like yarn or wool rather than thin like you would typically think.

The dream shifts and I'm walking with some old high school friends and acquaintances. We come across M, who's sitting on the floor in front of some people trying to take a picture. We tell her to get up and stop blocking the picture, and she says "This is a picture?" in a way that for some reason made me give out this awful dolphin-like laugh. I remember thinking in my non-lucid state, "stop that, you'll wake yourself up!". Sure enough I did.

After this dream sequence, I got up as my fiance left for work. I walked my dog so he wouldn't bother me for the rest of the session and drank a little apple juice. I MILDed with "I will become lucid in my next dream" and "The next time I see a person, I will look at my hands and realize I'm dreaming". The first dream had very low lucidity. It was sort of a western setting in a two or three story house. Outside I could see a desert/grassland with tall grass growing and mountains in the background, and the sky was really beautiful (should have RC'd here also, abnormal sky is a dreamsign). I walked around the house and looked out of the windows.

From this dream, I awoke into a false awakening. In the FA, I was trying to get back to bed to LD (didn't catch this). At some point I opened my dream eyes and saw a shallow, long, white plastic sink on the wall. It occured to me that I was dreaming because that doesn't exist in my room, but it didn't "click" until I got up and reached for the knob. At this point there was a shift in my consciousness that almost threw me off balance, like flipping a switch. I walked to a nearby mirror on the wall and experienced what people say -- the properties of my face were changing and twitching, especially my nose, jaws, and lips. I didn't say "clarity now!" like I usually do, and I really need to stabilize. I had some feeling throughout my dream body, but felt numb, so I started slapping my face and pulling on my lips, tongue, cheeks. I was incredibly focused on engaging my tactile senses. I tried to summon my dream totem associated with stabilizaiton, but for some reason I didn't have pockets. I decided I would summon a DC to help, so strangely I called out the name of an acquaintance from high school (I haven't even consciously thought of this person in years). At first I called aloud, and I could only get out the first name since my voice was garbled as it always is. So I used non-verbal commands! I looked towards the doorway and she appeared! It was awesome to see this work, as it's only worked for me in the past in a semi-lucid. I think I told her to give me a massage so that I could feel my body better. She had a serious face on and nodded agreeably. I was wearing a red t-shirt and a thin, dark blue jacket like the band kids used to wear. I started to take this off, and sat back on the bed as she approached, at which point I woke up.

The first thing I did upon waking was an RC (I've been trying to train myself to do these at each waking), but it wasn't a dream. I was really pissed at myself for not thinking of the ways I've stabilized in the past ("clarity now!", breathe in and focus on senses, pry eyes open, etc.), but I was happy to have an LD after about a week-long dry spell. I reflected on what I could have done better and visualized it, then MILDed again and went to sleep.

I had a chain of FAs/DILDs at this point*. In the first, I was in a lit version of my bedroom. I got up, became lucid, and walked around briefly before losing lucidity. In the next, I'm in a grocery store on a higher staircase. I see a lot of DCs around the corner of the opening, and I look at a clock that says "08:00". I become lucid, feeling off-balance like before, and walk around the display, looking at some bread before losing lucidity. In the next dream, I'm on the street of my childhood home looking at a large white column in the middle of NOG's yard (one of our neighbors). There's moss or dirt up to about shoulder level on the column. My sister and mom are behind me and commenting on the small car parked in middle of the yard, trying to make out the license plate. I become lucid and start looking at some huge leaves on some plants that appeared spontaneously. We're looking through the leaves, arguing whether the license plate is UWP 117 or 116. The dream fades slowly out and back in, then fades completely.

From here I had a series of longish NLs:
I have a collection of wood carvings/sculptures. One in particular is of Spyro, the others are small people. The house I'm in reminds me of a previous vacation house.
There is a mouse running around the backyard at my childhood home. It runs up to the door and allows me to pick it up. My parents' dog and mine both just sniff at it when it approaches. It's almost cartoon-like, but is very real. We all fall in love with the mouse. At some point my sister finds a "water snake" which looks like it's breaded with panko bread crumbs until she places it in a bucket full of water and cleans it off (now it looks like bread dough). There is a 1ft dark green toady that walks through our back porch in the midst of all this, as well as some small slugs. My mom is sad/angry, lashing out passive agressively (this is practically a dream sign).
The next dream is in an urban fantasy setting (by this I mean full-out fantasy that just happens to pass through some urban sections, not vampires and werewolves in modern clothing). I am tasked with delivering something. I have to walk around these long, curving, somewhat cyberpunk blue corridors in the middle of the city. I'm wearing peasant's clothes and have a sword. Whatever it is I'm delivering is in a brown sack (possibly the remains of something or someone?). I have to double-back at some point (this could be a dream sign, going down the same path twice). Eventually I arrive at the base, which is a fraternity or sorority house. I meet with the buyer/receiving party, and they say that it's not what they expected. Don't remember much after this and my pen ran out of ink, so the world will never really know.



Overall, it was a pretty good night! Summoned a DC and learned to use non-verbal commands. Will need to practice and visualize how to stabilize VTA (visual, tactile, and auditory) senses more.

*Because of their short nature and the fact that they were pretty much chained together, I'm going to count all of these short lucids as 1 in total, for a grand total of 2 LDs tonight.

Night of September 1, 2018. Saturday.

Dream #: 18,884-08. Reading time: 48 sec.



I enter a light sleep, with the flu. I am sitting on our couch in reality. I hear knocking (three knocks each time) in two areas of my head over time. I remain aware of my liminal state.

I am vaguely aware of the virtual division between the dream state and wakefulness, which forms as a sash window with no curtains. I am uncertain of the location. The room is mostly featureless. I get the impression of daylight through the window.

I think about vestibular system correlation (and imaginary proprioception) and its role in waking starts. I sense preconscious activity and see Mary Poppins cheerfully looking in through the window. As I remain uncertain if I am on the first or second (or higher) floor, I do not know if she is hovering or standing.

---

Vestibular personification is often associated with flight (when the discernment of my physical body is inviable or ambiguous). The instinctual anticipation of vestibular system correlation comes before the personification of it. In this case, I am aware of the process, though not deliberately creating the simulacrum’s identity.

---

The relevance is that Zsuzsanna and I lived in Maryborough when we first met, where the author of “Mary Poppins” was born.

---

Created Friday 31 August 2018

Got three DILDs to note, along with a few fragments.

Dream 1 - Drool School

The visuals were mostly clear. I was in a crowded middle school classroom. Many of the students there were those I've only met in highschool. Similarly, my 12th grade math teacher was leading the class. Much as in previous dreams, some zany mishap caused me to be a student once again. The room was quite crowded with random furnishings, even a stretcher. But, besides the desks, us students were prohibited from using them.

Cut to the end of class. In the hallway, I pass the live-action versions of Wolverine and Storm as depicted in the first X-Men movie. I then thought to sneak to the lunchroom. It seemed a bunch of other people had the same idea, given the long queue just outside the cafeteria, so I just continued onwards.

Soon, in a narrow courtyard, I spotted a swimming class taking place. The teacher was a thin African-descended woman. Meanwhile, the students were already in their swim wear. Far as I could tell, the lesson included procedures on how to handle potential harassment.

Eventually, the courtyard opened up into an entire beach, the sand coarse and distinctly black in color. Powerful waves vividly reflected the blue sky above. Such a view instantly triggered lucidity. Just then, the waves became more violent, as if reacting to my awareness. I slowly backed away, just to find that the water has already flooded the place up to my hip. Still, I managed to avoid from getting submerged by the tides.

I waded back to the courtyard. Took a good moment to rub my hands thoroughly. After that, I set my efforts on my guide, E. I began shaping the water into her form (if scaled to much greater heights), but it wouldn't hold for long enough. I even tried adding sand in the mix, and also transforming a nearby pillar, but no luck.

Then, I noticed a distinct figure passing by, a woman in a white niqab and like-colored dress. I unveiled her cloak, and found this was a pretty, petite Caucasian woman, face narrow, eyes wide, and hair long and dark. Despite not being anyone I've ever seen, I could sense this was actually my guide. Indeed, after recovering from surprise, she flashed a familiar cheeky smile. We hugged, of course. I asked why she didn't quite look like herself. "Just a snag.", she claimed.

Things distorted. My sight projects into a distant 3rd person view. Ahead, I see my guide, now gigantic, nude, and appearing in her actual likeness (ie Asiatic and a bit plump), grinning down at my tiny form. She then, uh, licked me, covering my body in tepid drool. Couldn't keep from accidentally snorting her spit. I wake up gagging.


Scrap Group 1
At a waterpark with family. We leave at dusk. Mom is at the front seat, driving around like crazy.

At home upstairs. Various family members were gathered there. We look out at an ominous dusk sky. There were a bunch of people on our driveway, several laid out on the pavement. Figured some bad accident just occurred, and that someone probably even died. One victim was wrapped in a Superman blanket. Me and the others argue between ourselves. Later, a psychopomp (Death?) shows up to bickers with us as well.

Dream 2 - Guide Sightseeing

The visuals were a bit blurred. I was in a bathroom, shower running in a concealed tub nearby. Got aware quickly. I imagined my guide was the one at the shower. Good time as any for some "sightseeing". ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I shrunk down to about a foot high, then hovered and phased through the glass door. As the steam cleared, I saw that this was some random mustachioed guy, and well, I saw too much. Noped the hell outta there.

After phasing through the wall, I ended up in a similar shower as above. This time, I found E. I circled around her in plain view., then let her take hold of me. By the looks of it, she wasn't very happy to see me. The dream collapsed soon after.

Dream 3 - Guide in a Box

The visuals were mostly clear, if slightly dim. I falsely awakening in bed. I walk out to a large kitchen of an unknown site. Mom was there making coffee. Reckoned she was there to remind me that I'd agreed to help with her gardening. I went past her to a hallway, when I got the idea to float around. Doing as much triggered awareness.

I hovered down into a cramped living room, twilight peeking from a glass door. Took a very long moment to rub hands, then to ease my breaths. I spotted a large blue box containing an RC vehicle or drone. I held the box, then tried transforming it into my guide. It took a good half a minute of calm focus before I noticed a change, starting with a featureless human hologram. Before long, my guide had formed in my arms, her torso wrapped in a thin white sheet. She yawned and stretched before acknowledging me. "What d'ya need?", she asked sleepily. E gently scratched my chin and hair while waiting for a reply.

I then asked her... "MEOW!" Damned cat woke me up. Such is the risk of trying to LD so late in the morning.Given a choice, I'd chuck that little pest to the moon...

Created Thursday 30 August 2018

Got an LD loop to note. There's also a few fragments, although technically, they're actually several from yesterday morning that I forgot to record then.

Scrap Group 1
Watching and commenting on that JoJo's Bizarre Adventure fighting game with my bro.

In the bathroom, combing my hair. I noticed perfect squares and other unlikely shapes have been combed onto my scalp.

Dream 1 - Man on Fire

The visuals were mostly clear. I was walking around in a city's industrial area during a cloudy day. Eventually, I gained sudden awareness. Took about half a minute rubbing my hands. After that, I ran down the sidewalk, and, when gaining sufficient speeds, flew in the same direction, hovering inches above the pavement. I soon arrived near a metropolitan area. Just then, a violently explosive auto accident occurred nearby. The streets, the vehicles, and even myself were immediately engulfed in flames. Still, this didn't really bother me. I breathed towards an unfazed area of town, spreading a stream of the fire surrounding me in that area.

Lost awareness. More unknown occurrences until the dream collapsed. DEILD attempt. Unwitting transition about three minutes later.

Dream 2 - Frigid Moon

The visuals were mostly clear. I was at the lot beside my house, heading towards my home's backyard, sun high in a scorching, cloudless afternoon. Again, I gained sudden awareness. I drewing a rapier out of nowhere, which I used to conjure and shatter crescent ice formations with each swipe I took. I then felt out the now dead grass and exposed dirt beneath me, now tepid in touch, as opposed to the sweltering air around me.

The dream collapsed soon after. Another DEILD attempt, which I also let slip.

Dream 3 - Cold Hotman vs. The Cannibal Witches

The visuals were a bit blurred. I falsely awaken in the floor of the master bedroom. Got aware within seconds.

Just then, various figures began gnawing on my limbs and chest. I tried imagining this was all just a misunderstanding on my part, that I was actually getting an atypical massage or something, and had nothing to be afraid of. But, on a closer look, I found these figures around me were actually terrible witches, impossibly ancient, wrinkled beings dressed in rags. Each of them tore deeply into my flesh with their foul teeth and clawed hands. As disturbing as this was, none of these injuries actually felt painful.

Reactively, I changed my skin into diamond. I then stood up, struggling to keep these creatures from pinning me back to the ground. Taking a deep breath, I called out for an inferno. Time stood still for a moment, while the background dimmed out of view. An orb of fire soon surrounded me, smaller gouts of flame arcing on its surface. Once time and the surroundings returned, I found that all but one of the witches were dead, burned down to charred skeletons. Meanwhile, the live hag's right leg had been incinerated completely.

I shoved the amputated crone away, causing her to stumble to the floor. Then, I wrenched a smoldering skull nearby. Recalling the contest, I encased the skull in an ice crystal, which I then chucked at the monstrous old woman. Upon contact, the creature exploded into fine dust.

Lost awareness. This scene partially looped back. Later, I argue with my sister over what stats those hags would have in Liberal Crime Squad. Various more unknown occurrences before the dream ended.

Date of Dream: WED 29 AUG - 2018





Dream No. 410 - Separated Sections

Dream 410 A - Everything Except My Request (Lucid Dream 25)
I can’t remember how the dream started. From where I can remember, I was in some unknown building and the corridors had lifts everywhere, ultimately freaking me out. I said to myself, “I’m not going in any of them without 18-Volt”. I then picked up my pace and tried to walk the heck out of that building. I noticed that the scene was fading on me and changing into a new scene.

For the second scene, I was in my brother’s room, just casually walking around when I suddenly got the intuition to look at my hands. When I looked down at my hands, I only had five fingers but they were clutched around a pen… The hand looked no different to real life but I ended up reciting the automatic response of “I am dreaming”. I then decided to do some more reality checks to make sure that I was actually lucid.

I decided to approach the kitchenette area where there was not one, not two, but multiple mirrors on the wall in this dream. On second thought though, I actually did want to go and look into the mirrors as I was worried about what I would look like and thought that the dream was going to make me look scary. Instead, I decided that I would count my toes, so I walked over to the couch and put my foot on there, counting six toes!

Once I knew I was lucid, the intention hit me and I started diligently calling for 18-Volt but the dream was not going to co-operate for him either. I was calling “18-Volt!” like a broken record while now walking around the entire house on a hunt. At first, there was nothing but because I was lucid, I did not give up. Eventually, something did appear but the dream was only trying to give me some green coloured animal, I forgot which animal it was though.

I shook my head in disbelief and sighed “no...” to the dream and so then the holographic animal disappeared and I continued on with “18 Volt!”, now heading out through the laundry and into the backyard. Half way down the slope of the backyard, the dream decides to try something else on me… My dad starts fading into the scene and again, this time I yell, “no!”, then muttering to myself “Oh my god, you give me everything but 18-Volt”.

Then I went into the garage and out the front door, completing the loop of the house after calling for 18-Volt about 100+ times. When I was walking out of the front driveway, I finally noticed 18-Volt holographically appearing lower down in the court but as that was happening, I was waking up… I wasn’t happy about it but my ability to talk in the dream was now ceased.

Dream 410 B - The Croatian Tongue
I don’t remember much about this dream. From where I can remember, I was standing just outside the back door to my house, on the skinny concrete strip, talking to 18-Volt; I was facing towards the house, he was facing towards the lawn. Without thinking, I ended up for the first time in a dream, saying something in Croatian, I have forgotten what I said though. Looking absolutely confused and baffled, he then asked me what the heck I was going on about. He said something along the lines of “What kind of gibberish is that?”.

Before I had time to think of a reply, and to my surprise, Dreamy WB appeared in her dark-rust coloured hair, year 12 hoodie and black leggings and shoes, floating beside 18-Volt and she told him while pointing to me that I was not speaking gibberish, but rather “In the Croatian language”. 18-Volt then looks and goes to Dreamy WB, “She’s Croatian?”. And when Dreamy WB nodded in confirmation, 18-Volt grew this look of sheer amazement on his face, then looking to me and saying “No way!”. As this was happening, the dream was fading out and I woke up.



Dream Tasks
- Have Logan receive harsh penalties from Dreamy WB due to reckless social behaviours (Achieved? Partially)
- Have all members on the dream guide team obtain and apply knowledge on how to provide in-dream discipline to unruly parents (Achieved? No)

Challenges
- Start the dream off with Dreamy WB already present (Achieved? No)



Dream 410: Results (Competition #6)

410 A
Competition Night: 28
Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Lucid
Dream Guide: None
Emergency Team: None
Eligible For Competition Points: Yes

410 B
Competition Night: 28
Lucid or Non-Lucid?: Non-Lucid
Dream Guide: Dreamy WB & 18-Volt (On Trial)
Emergency Team: None
Eligible For Competition Points: Yes



Points For This Entry: 18.0
Calculation Details:
- First Lucid Of The Night (10.0)
- Was Introduced By DILD (5.0)
- WBTB Included (2.0)
- Non-Lucid Fragment (0.5)
- Have A Dream Guide Automatically Appear: Dreamy WB (0.5)

+ Previous Total: 118.5
Total Accumulated Points: 136.5




At the start of the night, I actually had an endless stream of nightmares; the only thing is that I can't recall any of the details. Due to this endless stream of nightmares, I woke up at 5:00 AM and didn't fall asleep until 7:00 AM; this was after I came back from the bathroom, looked at myself in the mirror and thought "if you don't get some more sleep, your mum won't even be able to recognise her own daughter"... I looked absolutely horrifying, especially around the eyes (I think I should have taken a selfie and posted it here on DV as proof!... Jokes).

Where the intention for 18-Volt in the lucid came in is that I all of sudden discover that the workplace I am doing work-experience at in December is actually conducting the interviews from the 10th of September! You might be thinking, what does 18-Volt and attending the real life interview have to do with each other? That's not the correlation though. It's the fact that I will be required to go to the 13th floor and as past dreams have suggested, I have a big phobia of elevators. Originally, Dreamy WB has been providing me with the in-dream therapy but lately the dream has been tampering with her and not allowing her to appear.

I could have ultimately put an intense amount of time into getting Dreamy WB back but there isn't much time until September the 10th. I feel that with this approach, the dream would only try to mess her up more and more and I would be wasting my time, rather than actually trying to get a reasoning with my phobia, allowing me to become somewhat competent. So instead of pursuing Dreamy WB at the moment, I have decided to go with 18-Volt. I like dream characters with a larger complexion when it comes to things like helping me face my fears as they can not only hug me, but also pick me up off the ground and hold me if need be, so I feel a higher sense of security with them, especially with a big, strong man. As September the 10th is very soon, I'm trying to make a very concerted effort to get as much exposure as possible, spending approximately 2 - 3 hours in the day, writing detailed letters or task plans in my exercise book. I stated that the minimum amount of times I would accept before September the 10th is twice (once each week) but these interviews can happen any time from then until the 27th of September, so if it is later, then I would prefer to have practice with 18-Volt at least 4 - 6 times as a minimum. I said that I would be competent to ride elevators in real life when I no longer have to touch 18-Volt (or Dreamy WB if she decides to come back on her own) and I feel okay when I wake up. Otherwise, if I don't have enough practice in-dream, then I'll be clambering to find a stair-well. Once the interview period is over (and hopefully 18-Volt's calmed me down enough), then I will be having a big crack-down on the Awareness Behind The Dream in-order to get Dreamy WB back.

A bit about Dream 410 B now. I find it impressive that as 18-Volt is expressing his confusion, Dreamy WB appears on his side to clarify it to him. Usually, when there is a new significant dream character, I often have a series of "getting to know you dreams" (I don't plan these ones, they just come) where we meet for the first time and then they end up interacting with me and then learning about me as well. In real life, I have written that if it was possible to have 18-Volt go and see Dreamy WB to get behind the scenes tutorials on how my dreams work and how I conduct myself; so that's maybe what manifested in her appearing to him to explain my "Croatian" situation. By the way, Dreamy WB was telling the truth; in real life, I am actually Croatian.

+ trying to find a private bathroom, for some "me time," my young kids are following me around like pranksters, not allowing me privacy. Find a bathroom in a bar/restaurant, work the sliding lock, but there are lots of openings in the walls about chest level, only partially closed. A group of people come and stand near me. A man comes too close for comfort and I rebuke him and reach out and push him away, saying he's too close

+ LD #242
[Went to bed about 1am, late, very tired. Bathroom trip around 5-6am. Decided to do MILD getting back into bed (didn't stay up). Long time falling asleep.] Outside, in a large open multi-levelled area with people mulling about on the different levels, I sudden realized I'm dreaming.
I do a quick nose pinch to verify with half a thought and yes I can breathe. I look around, I look at the people, feeling slightly unstable and wondering about the stability. I advance through the crowd, past various ladies, some of whom reach out to me, and find a nice girl. I ask her name, but I don't understand her response.

Spoiler for sexy time:

she gets naked and moves up my body putting her ahem right in my face, and makes the comment like "oh, so you like the smell!"

. The dream fades.

+ anemonies, almost lucid again, sitting, thinking of "me" time, I notice anemonies around me I'm trying to find a spot to sit without them, stand up move around behind stone I was sitting at to walk into corridor

+ outdoors, fight, gang following, pushing, dark

+ "ak mak" lodge, looking for place to stay, drive into parking lot, woman driving a small strange car with tank tracks instead of wheels with partial body damage around the parking lot ,I wonder if she knows her car is damaged. Walk inside to reception desk. Start taking to receptionist. Two men come up from my left, one of whom it turns out is Bill Murray, and he says to me (remarking on my hair), "Whoooaaa, buddy, getting pretty gray up there!" I give the swift rejoinder, "Look who's talking!!" (referring to his baldness), that shuts him up.

+ library study girl at reference desk. I know she's part of a study group club that frequents the library. She goes to the reference desk and requests a book of some sort.

+(f) chess game viewing board

+ sitting at desk in room at college studying hard. I look up out the window and there is a college girl standing right at the window with a low-cut top leaning forwards showing off her features. I am very attracted to her but feel a bit shy for looking at her. I then give her a good, solid look . Then some super hot friends of hers who are entirely topless also come to the window and prance and show off.

Spoiler for nudity comments:

They have some lovely b**bs and I appreciate the view. One in particular has pronounced, hard nipples standing up

. Inside the room is now full of people standing behind me. There is a guy, large, fat, stubble haired, jolly guy with food crumbs all around his face making some comment.

Created Wednesday 29 August 2018

Just a fragment and a very short DILD today.

Scrap Group 1
At a mall. I met up with a friend briefly. There was a library in the upper level of the place, which contained a shelf for tabletop RPG rulebooks. The moment I took a peak at one such book, a lady with glasses suddenly began chattering to me, blithering on about trivia. There was something interesting about all of this, but it was also kinda annoying.

Many dreamlets, some which became dreams. One was a false awakening in bed. I got up and walked out the door, where I quickly got aware. I then glanced back, to find a large roach creeping around the floor. So, I shot it with an energy beam. Despite the explosion, the vermin remained relatively intact, if belly-up.

I appear to be in a house and my brother shows up. He says he would like to see the new s9+ phone I got a few days ago. I show him and he and I began talking about it and it's features. Eventually I notice my brother get tired and started laying on the floor which is something he does often. I notice from the window that it was dim sunny outside. I become lucid once I started walking to the front door.

I open it and took a nice breath of fresh air. And began walking more while observing my environment. I notice the house was by itself with in a huge land of short trim grass and a few trails. I notice a playground connected to the left end of the house with a wire fence. I continue walking, looking up to the sky wondering about stuff. Then I decided I wanted to see my cousin as I could sense she was around and knew today was her birthday. I retrace my path back to the house and continue going a little bit to the opposite direction.

I then notice her with a group of other older people. She was sitting down seeming to be talking. I greet her and ask her how is she doing and that it's good to see you. We greeted each other and I lose my lucidity after the dream change to something else.

Backstory: I ordered a dybbuk box from ebay, and also some free holy oil from a church that claims to have a bible that leaks the oil by itself. I am now only waiting the oil in the mail. Also day after I messaged Jamie for real after several years. Still haven't gotten any response.

Keyboards

I was in a giant antique looking store. There big sections, and I walked through a few until I realized it was a musical instrument shop. I immediately went to the keyboard section. I walked up to a funny looking soundboard from a keyboard and somehow pulled the keyboard to me and it almost crushed me. It seemed to be a piano with a retractable keyboard....

Dream skips to outside and Jamie is with me, but can't remember if she was in the shop with me. She was starting to tell me she played keyboard or currently plays it... something like that. I say something about what I like to play on the keyboard. She responds to what I am saying but her words get jumbled up. I ask her to repeat what she said. She starts again but she can't speak properly. I am realizing she is having one of those dreams where you have trouble speaking like I used to get. Then she vanishes as if she had woken up. I wake up soon after.

Inside a house.

As I'm drifting off I briefly enter a dream where Jamie is walking past me, we are in a living room with dark lighting.

Dybbuk

First I'm standing in a house. The dream had been going on for quite some time but I can't recall the details. I'm in front of a couch where Jamie is sitting and she is smiling at me. My dad is next to her and has his arm around her... I'm thinking why would she allow such a thing to happen? I conclude she is perhaps unaware of what is happening and has her attention solely focused on me.

Dream speeds up. I'm alone in the basement living room now and a dybbuk box opens by itself on the floor and a black and white picture of a boy standing in front of a house flies out of the box and onto a wall. Then a ghost boy emerges from the wall.

I fall into sleep paralysis right away and can feel a dark presence. I can't move anything right then but I'm not worried and I know how to get out of it. I focus on the dark presence trying to enter into me by spinning the vibrations faster and again I see the picture against the wall of the boy. I am unsure of what I am trying to accomplish here so I begin praying to Jesus to get me out of this state. For a few seconds I can't seem to move any limbs but then I break free and wake up


Oil

Dream of getting the oil that I ordered for free. Instead of being in a vial, which is what I expected. It was in a large Jar. I pondered what to use it for. People said it heals the sick cancer even. Some said it had even restored marriages, relationships and friendships. I suddenly had an idea of what to use it for.

Oil again

Dream I came home and my aunt had a package for me. It was the oil. She asked what it was for. I explained it to her and then I woke up
The only other dream i had was sex related and it was very intense.

Aug 26 2018

I went to bed at 1:15am and woke at 5:45am. The first dream I remember was an NL. I was in a store at their early morning closing time, and there were only 3 workers present. I was on the frozen aisle. One of them said they would help me once they're done buffing the floors. I waited outside with an umbrella near the open back door of a van (I think they were going to help me load something). After this, I wrote something else in my DJ about a WW bus where I was dying and had to plan my escape. Not sure whether WW stood for WWII or Weight Watchers, both seem equally appropriate.

Before sleeping again I got up and went to bathroom (I find it's easier to return to sleep when I walk around first). Tried to focus on HI and WILD, but no success yet. Ended up MILDing with mantra "I will be lucid in my next dream".

Next time I woke was 7:35am. I had just had a long NL with a huge cast of DCs (was a family reuinion/party). I was hanging out with one of the non-family guests who I didn't know. For some reason it seemed like my family would or should have been angry at me for doing this, but they weren't. The dream transformed slightly and instead of being in my childhood home, I was in someone else's large house (I think I remember this house from a work party my Mom brought me to as a kid). I was now in a hallway that seemed like a bathroom but was filled with people. The doorway connected to the living room. I was speaking to Uncle B, who greeted me but was unusually curt (he's my godfather and is always very warm and talkative IWL). Somehow this triggered me to become lucid.

I looked at my hands and said aloud "I'm dreaming!". I looked at my uncle who had become sort of an expressionless robot (not literally but he looked confused, blank stare, furrowed brows). For some reason I poked him in the chest jokingly. His body turned towards me and he started approaching me menacingly. I felt fear at first, but then a surge of confidence. I put my hand out in front of me and said "You can't hurt me, this is my dream!". His face instantly turned friendly and he leaned back and laughed. He smiled and said "That's right ZAD! Excellent!" and he reached out and hi-fived/shook my hand. I walked around the party for a bit looking at the other DCs. They were all ignoring us and carrying on their own conversations. I don't remember if I lost lucidity or the dream faded, but I awoke after. I had a huge grin on my face when I woke up, it was awesome to have such control of the situation! I've had hostile DCs before and usually they kick me out of my dream, so this was a win for me.

I went to sleep with the same method again, trying WILD then resorting to MILD. The next time I awoke was 8:59am. I remember being in my childhood home on the couch, trying to fall asleep next to my fiance. Earlier my dad had come in and thrown at me making a joke about a roach crawling on it. Within the dream, I was actually trying to WILD! I felt my dream body fall asleep just as my waking body does, and was moving my dream-dream arm (i.e. visualizing the sensation of moving my dream arm without actually moving my dream arm). I kept waking back up and couldn't fall asleep in the dream. I remember being afraid of roaches crawling across my face.

At some point I was able to WILD in my dream -- I latched on to some HI that placed me in the same exact room but without the couch or my fiance. I looked at my hands and became lucid! The room was dark and I felt like I was losing visibility in the dream, so I walked to the light switch unconsciously expecting it not to work. Sure enough, it didn't. I was losing lucidity so I dropped to floor and felt the coolness of the wood with my hands. I also tried to use mirrors to stabilize, but I don't remember even seeing my reflection. I should have transitioned to another dream, but I didn't. I "woke up" in the previous dream and lost lucidity. From this dream I tried to DEILD in the dream, and the HI was really close to completing each time, but never materialized. It would be black and white outlines, with the camera moving in a similar fashion to the opening scene of Ocarnia of Time where the camera follows Navi through the village.

I believe the other dream (me on the couch with fiance trying to fall asleep) continued for a while. At some point the lights turned on and we were watching TV. A tall man in a white shirt and red shorts walked in front of the TV and my fiance asked me for some type of food from the kitchen. I yelled out at him, calling him Rob and asking for the food, but he didn't respond. So again I got up from the couch and walked towards the kitchen. At this point I became aware, looked at my hands to confirm, and became lucid. I don't think I said "I'm dreaming" like I usually do, but it was incredibly vivid. I walked towards Rob who was in the kitchen. He had that same furrowed brow and broken robot look about his face (his eyes and mouth looked like they were scribbled in). I approached him since he was standing in the way of the fridge, and he started walking menacingly towards me. I felt confident from my previous encounter, so I simply said "Rob, you were going to get me some "X food", right?" He instantly turned friendly and apologetically let me know that there wasn't any of that here. That was fine since my fiance and the couch had disappeared. I felt his shirt to stabilize -- it was now one of mine, a casual tan button-down. Feeling the texture stabilized the dream. I walked away towards the living room and the layout had changed. The hallway was gone and the curtains took up the entire back wall now. There were also more windows now. I looked out them and when I looked once, they would show night, when I looked again, they would show morning or daylight.

I started losing lucidity, so I turned around and faced the kitchen and curtains (there was no furniture in the living room now). I focused on my breathing. The visuals improved a hundredfold. All of the colors enhanced and felt like I was looking out of a kaleidoscope or a stained glass window -- especially with the curtains, which IWL are very bland. Although the visuals improved, there was a white bar blocking the bottom quarter of my field of vision. I tried to imagine that it was like eye black so I could peel it off, but I couldn't. So instead, I tried to take it out like contact lenses, and my eyes naturally rolled up. This almost caused me to lose lucidity, so I just accepted the white bars for now.

I approached the back-left window and opened it. I imagined that it was light and would slide right up. It did! But it was so light that it easily slid back down. I crawled up (and felt my legs here, something that rarely happens in LDs for me) and put my body through the window, continuously sliding the window up as I went through. I could see that there was an awning coming down from this window, and instead of being ground level, I was four or five stories up. It was a hotel, it reminded me of the Arlington in Hot Springs for some reason. The awning was more like a giant blue tarp, and one corner was tied to my window, the other corner being tied to the ground. I decided I would fly down. Unfortunately I unconsciously doubted myself and as I fell I started losing vision. I tried flapping and that helped a bit, but I ended up landing on my back. The dream almost completely faded, but I sort of DEILD'd (still within the outermost dream) myself back into it.

Now I was on a suburban street where I had landed. There were biggish houses lining the street, and a few houses in front on the right, I saw a man and a wife in a truck, possibly about to back out of the driveway or just arriving back. I manifested Animal Mother's gun from Full Metal Jacket (I think an M60) and started shooting at them. I could see the bullet holes in the cars and buildings, but I didn't hit them. Then I walked over to a group of teenagers on their phones outside a nice house. I pointed the gun at them and told them to get inside. I wanted to kidnap them and see if the police or someone would come to fight me. They sarcastically said "Oh no" and started walking into the house. From here the dream faded pretty quickly. I wrote all this down immediately with a huge grin on my face. I think this last lucid must have lasted at least 1 to 1.5 minutes, which is the longest I've had yet. Overall, awesome night!



*Note: The visuals overall in these lucids were the best I've had yet, but I forgot to enhance my sense of touch! I need to work this into my mantra or my memorized list of steps of things to do once I become lucid. So when I was holding the M60, I was really just positioning my hands as if I was. I actually couldn't feel or see it either, I just believed it was there. I don't think I actually pulled a trigger, I just made sounds with my mouth

**Other note: I think the dreams where I was on my couch was a type of false awakening, just not where I actually was IWL.

***Edit: Forgot to mention that in my last lucid, when I was walking through the living room the second time, I asked aloud "Subconscious, how do I make my dreams longer?", but got no response.

Non-dream stuff - a couple of non-lucid fragments and small DILD lucid.

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Dream fragment 1:
I was at a garden centre place and there was an old man that (in the dream) was a regular I came to talk to. Come to think of it he looked a bit like the kind of old man like the guy who delivers certain parcels to us. He was on a small step-ladder tending to some sort of plant colony on a pot. He was flipping a "plate" of dirt around, because of seeds or something. There were many terracotta plant pots displayed around this outside part of the garden centre, in a somewhat hectic manner, but that seems to be how it tends to be in waking life too.

Dream fragment 2:

I remember playing a game, like Path of Exile, and I remember seeing the screen. Some monsters from another game such as Monster Hunter appeared and I didn't make note of that fact. But then I got a lot of oddly lucky item drops, and the character (or my dream self?) said something odd and I remembered to do a RC as I've been getting used to doing every so often while I'm on the computer too.

I held up my hands with my palms facing me, partially blocking the screen and I realised I was dreaming because my right hand's fingers were missing segments. It felt like I became too excited, as with other times, and the dream quickly destabilised, but I also made particular note of being too aware of the waking world environment at the same time that the dream visual detail was getting lost. I tried spinning, and doing something with my hands, and also produced a chocolate bar (that I could no longer see) and tried eating that; it did taste somewhat of chocolate, though I'm not certain if it was dark or not, but the dream faded anyway.

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Notes:

• Before I went to sleep the last night, I remembered I haven't been setting an intention properly for dreaming lately.
• I initially set an intention that I might lucid dream and reminded myself that I could do it; then I realised that there was something wrong about the way I set my intention but did it again and it felt different.
• Despite not being able to see the chocolate bar, I know it was a Cadbury's chocolate bar, because I could still "see" the purple wrapper, even though I couldn't see.
• After waking up I did a RC and when I came to write this DJ entry I did a few more too. I tend to always RC in the morning.
• I may have lost some detail on the memory of the dreams overall because between looking after my partner's dad's yowly cat and needing to use the bathroom desperately, it was being a bit difficult to hang on to the memories.

I was taking a nap today after missing a lot of sleep this week on the job, when i dreamed I was looking from outside my house from the street towards my front door. There was a package there. I knew I had ordered something earlier in the week but did not expect it so soon. When I woke, I remembered the package, what it looked like and the amazon label on it. I was like, if I open my front door and there is a package there it means I astral projected out of my body and saw that package. Sure enough...it was in the exact same spot I saw it from the road in my dream..which I now know was not a dream but a pure out of body experience or remote viewing..cool stuff!!