lucid

Bedtime: 11 pm, did meditation before bed, eat early so not that full stomach, daytime awareness decent. did some visualization of my previous lucid dreams
had problems falling asleep (needed like 1-1.5h till fall asleep) unusual but maybe fullmoon maybe because i did an hour nap at afternoon.

-"Nightmare" or better say unpleasant dream:
in a room. some bananas on the table/ground. a big black-yellow spider comes from them and runs and jumps around. switches the room. i lock the first so it cant go back. i run after it and in the next room. a hell lot of plants (bananaplants?) i dont find the spider. think about putting something yellow on the ground so the spider comes and wants to hide there? a couch with some friends sitting. i talk to them and see 2 or 3 spiders right behind a friend. tell her not to move and want to approach her. suddenly i feel a spider on my left foot. i scream and wake up.

--> not super nightmarish like awake with high heartbeat and all sweaty but i normally dont have this kind of dreams.

-FA: i look at the clock and see its 6am (need to get up at 7am) so i decide no try to get lucid because i want to sleep. wake up afterwards and see its 4:40... damn

-FA: i stand up and look at my hand. it is a little blurry but i think its because my eyes are tired. i look closer and count fingers. there are five. so i am "awake" NLD

-LD:
i am at a small store. i go some stairs down and see some muffins. i wonder if xy has baked them. i look at my hands but they look pretty normal. i do a noseplug but very little air comes thru. this time i not led up and think about how i could prove now if i am dreaming or not. i look outside at a stores sign. i look three times and everytime a completely different word is standing there. i smile and feel happy and tell J "wow i am still dreaming" and start flying slowly away. i levitate/fly thru the street and meet another friend. i fly on my back and ask her how she is. i keep flying some feet stop and remember i want to summon my roommate. i try the hand behind back technique but it seems that i have the wrong mindset i am not impatient and only feel my hand entangle in my jacket. i think shortly and decide that i sure will find him in the store i left because there where other friends of mine to. i go there and he is not there i call his name and in this moment he runs down some stairs and jumps on the street saing "Tadaaaa" everyone is happy to see him and wants something of him. i go to him and make him clear that i want to talk to him alone. he jumps on my back and i want to start flying (obviously i dont belief he can fly on his own ) i start and he falls down. i help him up and tell him to hold tighter. we try again and slowly i rise. i tell myself that its not more difficult to fly than alone but still we are pretty slowly but steady. i fly on a roof where we stop and sit down.i rub my hands. i ask him if he wants some candy and have a big smile on my face because i want to do the summon out of the pocket move. i put both hands in my pockets and get out some candy plus a used tissue and a tissuepack. i put them away again and we continue talking. i notice that somehow i have some sweets in my mouth too but i dont mind because tasting will ground and stabilize the dream. i tell him how much i like him and tell him that he appear in atleast one dream every night. i ask him if he might help me get lucid next time when he appears in my dreams and i am not lucid. he dont get it and tells me we can rent a cottage and spend some time together there. i say ya cool but i dont mean that. i explain again. he nods careful and i dont think he really get it. atleast its not the reaction i wanted to hear. a guy is coming a rooftop next to us and rant something. L is asking if it is okay if we are on this rooftop and i tell him who cares this is my dream and if someone has a problem with it will see what he get right? i ask loud and the guy says something like hell yea! while we talking i look onto the horizon and see an explosion or something but without sound and a shock wave expanding and coming to us. i dont want the conversation to be interrupted and so i stretch my arm in the direction and put some will into so the wave stops right infront of the riverside. my roommate didnt notice anything because it happened behind his back. he climbs of the roof and wants back to the other guys. i think about run after him but then i decide that i want to try out t he blink eye teleportation (i incubated this scenario or this goal before sleep) i want to teleport to my room because i know it pretty good and can visualize it easily so this is a good start i think. i close my eyes and imagine my room with the bed on the left side, my table, my cupboard... i feel a slight falling backwards, open my eyes and i am lying in my bad with a pillow on my head (Daytimeresidue: i woke up before because my other roommate´s alarm was ringing for his work so i put a pillow on my head and fall asleep again). Its not the feeling of a FA. i know that i teleported. i do a short noseplug and i can breath completely free. i stand up, notice that i have my sleeping cloth on but i dont care, its a dream . i dont know what to do because i didnt incubate anything after the teleportation (kind of didnt tought it would work that easy) i think about jump out of my window for some action but i decide to explore the apartment. i go into the kitchen and notice that it looks different than usual. its dark so i want to turn on the light but it dont works. i dont care and go into my roommates room. he is doing some random movements with his hand like ti shi. i accidentally suprise or scare him and he rants shortly. i ask him if he cant remember that we where together some minutes ago. my alarm starts ringing and i try to build it into the dream and say to him hey your alarm is ringing but wake up some seconds after.

This was a very nice and aware lucid without worrys of waking up or instability. i needed this because the last 2 or 3 dreams i started to get a problem with thinking oh might this dream gets unstable or may i fall into the void and it always happens then... this time i was likE "this dream will last forever"
and teleportation is sooooo coool ! and the close eyes be somewhere else is very easy and fast way. its nice to see i dont have problems with closing my eyes in dream

Did three sessions of half an hour meditation and one shorter right before bed, had decent awareness thru out the day, got to bed with pretty full stomach. had not that good mood.
Bedtime: 22:20

Awake with this very long vivid semi-to lucid dream: 1:40
(shortened a little because way to detailed in my Paper DJ)
Standing on a Street with V. its dark package of someting falls down and starts jumping and spinning around like there is some pressure on it. we get a little wet from it on. i taste it and say to him: do you have this sometimes too that something dont tastes like expected or not at all? we hide behind a wall so someone doesnt see us? i push it with TK down the road into the water. one can still hear the sounds it makes. on the right side is an apartment. a woman wants to exit but before she reaches the door i do a handmove and lock the door so she cant open it. she uses her key and gets outside. some more people are coming. i push a kid via TK so he falls down. (no harm done just a little push ) i push also a girl on a bike but help her up with TK again... two other women are coming that dont seem to notice me. Via mindcontrol i force them to look one after another up to me so i can examine them in detail. i talk to V how funny it is do to this stuff. we go some feet away. there is a crowed and i let about 6 people levitate with TK. its a little bit difficult and 3 in the middle are sinking but after all all are in the air. V stands about 150 feet away. i aim for him and try a kamehameha (dragonball Z) and it works like a charm. i dont see the energy in my hand but when i push a bright energybeam goes of in his direction. first try i miss because its to high. he shots back and i jump to the side. i think i throw some firebeam aswell?. i throw another energybeam and this time i hit the ground right in front of him and a pretty big explosion happen. he gets thrown away and i think he´s dead... that was not my intention... i run to him and its a little bit like in a game where you can collect his Crystal/soul whatever and i run with it back to a point where i can revive him. time is running up in the upper side "of the screen". i revive him and tell him i am sorry and tell him i just wanted to try the kamehameha. he says no problem no harm done
Change of location
we are at a parking lot for trucks. there is a fence around. even if i dont see clearly water i kind of know that there is water. i hijack a speedboat (like in GTA, same feeling here) and V enters from the the jetty. we drive a bit (3rd person view of the boat) and i get into some metal mill (defecator?) and the boat explodes and we get dropped out. there is no water again and its a parking lot. i enter a trailer and pick up "accidentally" a baseball that get add into my "inventory" i wash my hands? i go out and search for a car or something and pick up a basketball same thing. i go to the end of the parking lot where some friends are standing. my awareness rises again and it dont feels like a game anymore. i ask them if they know where V is because he helps me to be grounded and stable in the dream. i dont find him so i spontaneously think about Sensei´s Blink eye teleportation and want to try it. i fix a location not far away in sight distance. i close my eyes, expect to be there feel a little bit like falling backwards open my eyes and am there. i do it again and teleport back to my friends. i try a more distant location. a petrolstation far away. i do it again but do it to fast and have not the feeling of falling back. i repeat with more calm and i feel like beeing there but my sight stays at my friends. i go back and they are cheer and i am super happy it works so easy. i see some friends coming and teleport right infront of them. i ask them if x and y are mad at me for leaving without saying something (previous dream) my awareness is dropping again and after some time i wake up


--> this was an awesome dream. made a lot of fun and was more aware for a earlnight lucid then the ones i had before. i am really happy about the blink eye teleportation because it felt so nice and smooth and without problems (i once did portals that was way more difficult). i think it is even very good that it was a little semilucid so i didnt overthink the whole thing like oh new tech. for sure it will be difficult hopfully i dont wake up when i close my eyes... i just did it and now that i did it it will be way easier in future because i know i did it once and it works!

at 2:50 finished writing the dream down... was way to awake afterwards... had problems falling asleep...

-another NLD: talk with my brother about his future. while talking transition from a room into a bus. i smell fire. run around the bus to see if there is danger. but no someone smokes...

-low level semilucid dream:
i am in a room with high dark stones in different heights. a guy is doing this:

(Daytime residue: watched a youtube video someone was doing this on a mountain)
i´m like wow i want to try this to. i do and i have a enlightenment that if i stretch one arm i feel more stable in the position. i climb up fast the highest of the stone pillars. (like at least 150feet) high and do it up there. i feel my stomach a little bit fussy because its damn high and on the bottom i see that the people are discussing something. i slip down the pillar like it was a pole and tell the guy what i did. i want to do it again and jump up from the bottom right to the top and do it again and have again this uncomfortable feeling. i jump from pillar to pillar all the way down. it feels great. the whole time i kind of know i am dreaming and i can do whatever i want. i reach the bottom and a woman is locked in a room. she tells me she is locked because she pulled out a knife (that was the discussion about before). she tells me i should be locked up to because she know what i do (referring that i am a lucid dreamer and jump that high) she starts screaming and yelling and people are coming. i try to silently move away because i dont want any attention

-another NLD: guy is stealing some money and tobacco from my backpack. i catch him. we keep going. i want to roll a joint... someone wants that i show him how. i see that the guy is again at my backpack taking my tobacco. i ask him if it is his and he twitches with his shoulders and says kind of yes. i say to him he can keep it.

-again nearly lucid dream:
i go by a street i know. i look at my watch 3 times. the watch is analog and shows tree slightly different times all around 6 am. i smile knowing i am dreaming but dont stop but move on. some NLD is following. again a woman whispers to a guy she wants to look after me because i am kind of special (again because i am a lucid dreamer)

Notes:
- I got triggered all because of my bear dream sign. I realize that sounds really spiritual and stuff but it's not; I only see bears in my dreams and I just know to recognise it now. They also come with a certain emotion, a fear of something far away that's coming for you.
- The RC was so pathetic... I think I'm going to stick with the "focusing" RC, where I observe the world and take in every detail.

[Plot 1 begins]
One of the cats and the dog were loose on the porch, and something told me to go get them. So I open up the porch door and see my dad out there. He looks off up into the hills behind me house and says, "There's a bear up there".

I swear, at that moment the sky got darker. I get the same kind of feeling from a dream bear that a Dementor from harry Potter would. Same deal, same fear that something is coming for you, and that it will get you.

At this moment, I step outside and grab the dog and the cat and bring them in. I close the door hurriedly, but the other cats had escaped while I was grabbing the others. I freak out; I know that the bear is close, and so I step out to get the cats when I realized, "Hey... could this be a dream?" I looked at my hands and got this really ridiculous FOV effect, and my fingers were all stuck together like a 90's video game. BUT I DIDN'T NOTICE. At this moment, I kinda forgot what I was doing in the dream and everything was ok. My dad and I were just hanging out on the porch.

[The dream fragments...]

I am having a dream and at one point I am sitting in a circle with some friends and family. There are a lot of people so I look up to see who all is here. Then right that instant I am on a beach at the ocean. The sun has probably set (not a lot of light left). My mom and dad are in front of me, and we are walking. I continue to look around to see who if the people are still around. No one is around except for maybe some people far off in the grassy sandy lot.

The next instant I am at a walmart. I am walking behind three people I know from high school. I know I am dreaming. I'm not sure if I just felt it, or if I knew because of the sudden transition. I didn't have any conscious thought as to how I knew I was dreaming.

I am walking behind these people and they are pushing a baby stroller. I do not notice a baby in the stroller. One boy is waving a baby bottle in the air and I make a half-hearted attempt to see if I can get the bottle to fly out of his hand. It doesn't. I notice that all of the visuals are realistic. Just like real life. However, I don't feel anything, including my body moving, and I don't remember hearing anything. All these thoughts are in my head and my dream begins to become shaky. It's about to collapse so I try to rub my hands together. The second I go to move my arm I wake up. I maybe even ended up moving my real waking life arm.

27.10.2015

Bank Robbery & Potentially Escaping to New Jersey (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

There was a grandiose robbery going on where it seemed more of a series of technical idiosyncrasies that caused it vs. a physical attack. I was an affiliate of someone that was helping me get some gold bars covered in black metal with the monetary value of them. Each one was close to 55k-100k, but I’m not sure about the actual value in terms of $, euro, etc.

Most of the environment is very bland with blue and gray, and the carpet for some areas were a mélange of fainted warm colors dominated by the cool color. I wasn’t able to recall the visage of the individual that was helping me hoard money, but based on how he escaped, he was of Asian descent. He had a short hairstyle, and seemed to be in his 30s.

The more I describe him, the more his visage looks like one with a rough visage. Yes, a slightly spiky hairstyle to him, and a bit of a slanted forehead from the 3/4s angle projected in my mind’s eye.

Anyway, it seems I’m lucid mostly during the end of the operation, and the ending looks like why where everyone is going their separate ways, and moving on to whatever quotidian lifestyle they want to enhance with the wealth that they’ve gathered.

The robbery itself doesn’t seem to be one that causes moments of consternation for most of the dream characters. I was apprehensive on wanting to give some gold for the Asian male that presumably helped me out. I believe I had at least a million dollars in gold, and was willing to give 100k-150k for the male. However, just as I was about to profess to him, he’s already going his own way, which probably implies he has just as much, or more than I do.

I put the gold bar encased with black metal back with the other stack, and now had to devise my own way of getting out. There were two dream characters near me; one to the left, and one to the right. The one to the right seemed like another affiliate because I queried, “Where’s the gun?” and they immediately used the side of their shoe to spin it across the floor to me.
As soon as they did that, they ran away as well, and all that’s left is a random elderly black female wearing a faded purple shirt and some cool colored pants. She’s just casually reading over some documents, and seems to be passive in terms of being aware that there has been an internal bank robbery going on, or she’s feigning her disposition to prevent retaliation from me, and any other individuals.

I was not made privy to the layout of the bank in particular, or maybe I just had a relapse in memory at the time, but the starting point was unfortunately having to utilize her as a shield. However, I didn’t force myself to do this to her, and merely just ducked under the desk she was sitting around. It was a thin black metal desk and chair, and her slightly grandiose weight was a useful way to cover.

Then what happened next completely changed the mood of the dream to where I could take advantage of the moment, and get off scotch-free, I guess. I was in the prone position, and I could barely see the top of someone’s head passing through the small hallway trying to navigate, and potentially shoot anyone that seems suspicious.

That individual looked like one of my managers I used to work, so let’s call him Jess for now (Hispanic one for future reference with black glasses). He seems to notice that someone is near the elderly female, and takes a shot or two, but is only able to make a few fractures to the wall she’s sitting nearby. I immediately declared to him,

“Jess
Jess…it’s me.”

I put my hands up, and his disposition went from earnest to one of enthusiasm. It was the typical long time, no see conversation with a subsequent handshake, and the dream completely influences me to make a complete 180 in my disposition.

Jess started telling me how he shifted his role from retail to more technological aspects, but I’m not able to pick out the exact job position he was talking about. He was wearing a light gray polo shirt and black dress pants, and puts his hands around his hips while his arms are in a sideways V position.

The conversation was short, and I feel that through him, I was able to casually leave the building without anyone feeling suspicious. As I’m walking out, I started to question if this was even a bank robbery at all. I noticed to my right that there’s a female with long curvy black hair that looks like a co-worker of mine. For some odd reason, I feel predisposed towards her as if we’ve been in a relationship with each other in this dream for some reason.

It felt as if those predisposed infatuations and attractions towards her were taking dominion of my preference to just tone my actions down completely. Somehow, the materialistic gain made me more giddy towards her, but I didn’t have the intention to shower her with items. She was wearing a dark navy blue polo shirt that I’m sure she buttoned up with faded blue denim jeans of some sort. I can tell she was wearing her thick black glasses, and I realized how she’s taller than me.

Just as I’m trying to be gregarious with her, as if it’s the only chance I would get, a random Asian Indian male interacts with me. He’s wearing a yellow shirt, light gray pants, and some brown sandals. He looks like he has a clean haircut going on, and looks like someone name Brian from New York that I used to know. He’s asking me if I want to move to New Jersey, and queries how much money I have. I didn’t question why he would suddenly query this after the event that just occurred, and things seemed like a blank canvas in terms of how I could react to this.

For the girl, that I’ll nickname Abbey, she was someone that I wanted to query if she wanted to move in with me to New Jersey. Then, the second dream character that is portrayed looks like my mother that suddenly has the accent of Consuela from Family Guy.

She’s like,

“No….you can’t do that…nooo. Noo.”

She starts to scratch me subtly, which is awkward with the music that was playing when I was thinking of Abbey awhile ago:

I started to move my arm away from her because it was awkward and irritating. My predisposed attractions towards Abbey started to augment, and before I could be gregarious with her, I was quickly thinking on the meaning of having to move to New Jersey when I could stay in Texas instead, and buy a decent house.

I felt that these predispositions would go in vain, and yet, it seemed that I was guided towards her. This mélange of unconscious guidance and emotions made me query why a certain individual in waking life was querying over what my hobbies her, and from a dream interpretation site that I take loosely, utilizing gold in a certain way means I should find a new hobby.

Or in other words, find a hobby that I would be able to synch with Abbey, however, I feel it could just be another co-worker that’s using middlemen to extract things I do for quotidian activities. I wanted to make the decision to move to New Jersey with her, but still was attached to Texas as I like the grandiose feel to it vs. the more compact and economical feel New Jersey had in my previous experiences.

Flustered with figuring out what to do, I figured that the first step was to touch her shoulder instead of trying to calculate everything to declare to her. And just as she’s turning around with a smile on her face, the dream starts getting blurry, and I believe someone wakes me up.

It’s going to be awkward going to work.

+ (f) longer dream poorly recalled, culminating in walking in a large open field in the country (with wife?) what was our property, at the finale: standing and observing a creek and the beginnings of a big bridge (we were building?), a huge chunk of concrete on the far bank and some temporary wooden frame

+ ski slope, no snow, met some skier, I work there? climbing up hills, streams of (chopped wood?) flowing down the hills trying to make progress against these, eventually make it to the top of the hill and file a report on my experience.

+ epic: return to former adult home

At the beginning: long sequence in the back yard of my old home, the new owners are away. I need to finish some yard work? I see my old [deceased] dog? At some point: wandering through the house itself, observing things, [inaccurate], interacting with new owners, putting up some sort of infrastructure.

I'm walking towards the house and catch a glimpse of a nail sticking up out of the ground. I return and look closely and there's an entire irregular patch of 1" - 2" nails sticking (point-side up) up out of the ground, and say "you have to be careful here!"

I notice that there are large piles of our former things that we left here. Lots of little knick-knacks and many other items. I look for a box to pile all the stuff in to. It may just be a mess at our new place but the new owners will probably just toss all this stuff out so I should just take it with me. In a shed in the back yard all of our stuff is piled high. I take something from the pile in the middle of the shed and it is my sons old camping sleeping bag. I unpack it from its stuff sack and look at it: it is a dark-colored, mummy-style down sleeping bag. I think about writing an ad for it "almost new, very clean, only used once or twice." I wonder if it is too small for him now.

I'm facing the house yard to my back in the backyard and I take a few steps towards the house and [semi]get the urge to fly. I wonder if I'll be able to fly, and I try to take off and I do fly. I get a big smile on my face as I soar up over the roof of the house and observe the neighborhood from about 30 feet up in the air. As I'm taking off into the sky I think I see the former owners inside the house, along with former colleague GT [company "3"] who catches a glimpse of me as I take off.

From up in the air I see across the street is a middle-aged woman working in her front yard on concrete. I think about swooping down to her and engaging but decide quickly against it (she's not attractive). I fly around for a bit and return to my "current home" which is right next door to our former home [false].

I return then to the former home in order to continue retrieving our personal belongings from the shed in the back yard. I enter the property on the right side yard of the property. The new owner wife and husband are there. I meet the wife first, she's not very friendly, she approaches and says s.l. "after all this time, you're finally coming to meet us?" I ignore the jab and keep greeting them. Meet the husband. I get this idea and say to him, "when it gets hot in summer, we'll sit out on the veranda and drink tall mugs of beer." The wife says s.l. "you can do that on *your* property."

Workmen are hauling our former belongings out of the hut and piling them on the concrete in the side yard. I see some green and a purple yoga mats. I pull those aside since they are expensive. They're going to take all this stuff away.

I'm walking with the husband in the back yard towards the left side yard. I ask him "do you play racquet sports? Like tennis, racquetball?" He says "racquetball." I say "I haven't played racquetball in a long time. Do you play squash?" [No reply?].

My attention is grabbed by the structure that (I?) had begun constructing in the back yard. At some point there was a workman earlier who had come to work on it, and I see that he has completely finished it. Formerly open, he had closed the entire structure with dark square panels that go all the way up to "the roof" [in the back yard!?] closing it off. I say "whoa, he really finished that thing." I was very surprised since I didn't remember it looking that way the last time I looked at it. Other portions are still open. The new owners gets up and tried to look closely at it. I'm trying to point out a particular feature which is right there in front of his face: "to the right….to the left…it's RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR EYE!"

I turn and look back all over the back yard in the left far corner, seeing the entire back yard and the house. The hard is filled with this rough 2-level structure. I wonder what it's for, you could store things in there but it's not a strong structure, being built of what appear to be bamboo poles and filled in with straw. I say "You could store grass clippings here from mowing the lawn?"

Wake up and get concerned about the time. Indeed it's around 5pm now and I still need to get in a full work day, argh!

Oobe style Dild LD this morning at around 7am🌞 - as I don't need to be anywhere early this week I have enjoyed the extra morning time to Practice.

Suddenly I was aware that I am trying to read some text on a piece of paper in front of me. I am trying again and again to read it with no avail - "'I must be dreaming" I think and look around me - I am in my bed room and see my bed and what looks like a lump under the covers which I assume is me. I immediately try to levitate up and out of the roof but I just keep going forever so I decide to abort this plan...I see the hatch is open ( attic room )with light streaming in I dive down there and make my way into the living room where my bf is sitting watching the TV. I sit down in front of him and wave - he doesn't see me - I watch him for a while, he is laughing to himself and looks content but then his face starts to turn really sad and tears come down his cheeks ... then he starts to laugh again within all the tears. I am touched at his humanity 🐚 and throw a cushion at him to make him aware I am there - at this moment I awake inbed 🌸

When my dream body is back in bed I stay still for a while and ponder on the differnet feeling of how it felt tobe LDing and the starkness of WL - It seems to me during LD ones focus is very much in the front of ones head... hard to explain that feeling🌌

This is going to be a long entry!

First dream: Can't teach a fish how to swim

I'm swimming in a river contained in a cemented canal, on the insistance of my cousin. It's sunny and a little windy, but the water is really murky and the few reeds growing in the cement crack are gnarly and sickly. Luckily for me, the water around me is a litle lest disrty and I can see a little through it; my cousin wears a dark blue one piece bathing suit and is coated with grim, save fore her hair and face. She looks like she used to a few years back, when she wore her hairs shoulder lenght and parted in the middle, with blonde highlights. We reach a platform with metallic stairs, there is a group of men here, calling us and reaching out. I grab the railing of the stairs and pull myself out of the water, with a little help. The air is hot and dry; even the strong wind is hot and I can feel my skin dry in seconds. I walk up the stairs to get out of the canal, we're in the middle of a large, dirt and sand plain with nothing in sight but the canal. My cousin doesn't want to get out, and she find the current in the middle of the river and swims with is away from us.

I woke up and did a WBTB, reading stuff and nagging Eli for around twenty minutes

secon dream: Be careful of the curse that falls on young lovers/Starts so soft and sweet and turns them to hunters

I'm walking around town with my family, it's even late dusk or early evening, the street lamps are lit but still there is some sunlight, that grey light that stay around after the sun itself has desappear. It's a pretty town, with old stones houses in terraces and stone paved road; it's clean and pretty touristic, even with the aerial electric line crisscrossing the sky overhead. I lag a little behind and tell myself Eli should be here. He walks up to my side and I realise I'm dreaming.
I smile to him and he wraps his arm around my waist with a smile of his own. We walk a little and he asks me if I want to do anything in particular. I snuggle against him, drawning a blank, until suddently I remember one of my objective: finding my animal totem. I grab Eli hand and excitedly tell him that I want my animal totem. He let me drag him around town and we find a small place with a little gathering of animals under a street lamps. I walk to them and ask which one is my totem animal. A giant, soft gray wolf wearing another wolf skin of the same color like a coat, with the other wolf head half covering her own, comes to sit in front of me. She have light gold eyes and dark gray nose, and a very pink tongue. She's a little on the gangly side, and her paws look almost oversized.* Her head is larger that a average wolf, with more slanted eyes. She makes me thing of a fox in disguise, but I still think of her as a wolf. I ask her her name, and she remains silent, staring intendly at me. I pet her head and scratch gently her neck, asking her name again. She shakes her head, making the wolf fur on her back slips a little, and give me a gentle headbutt. I ask her a third time, and I hear inside my head a feminine voice, ringing like a silver bell, telling me "Name me!" I'm startled and let go of the dream.

*Eli think it looked like a puppy. A puppy the size of a small pony.

Third dream: Seven days to live

I'm controling a man in a zombie apocalypse. The air is gray and yellow, he is in a urban environement with broken up road and falled buildings. I feel the controller in my hand, and it's like I'm overing over his shoulder. I know through story exposition that this apocalypse come from an airborn virus, and that some people like the man I'm controling are unaffected by it. I use the bumpers to have him jump through windows and fight of the infected. They aren't very resistant, and their skin tear like paper under the blow, letting their muscles fall out with lymph rather that blood. In fact, there's very little blood, maybe a couple of small scratchs on my character, as a way to let the payer know that their life is slightly depleted. I make him jump inside a dirty white bus and I fuse with him, and I'm the charater as myself.
This bus is going to a safe place with people immune to the virus, but we're aren't sure that all of us are really immune, and the atmosphere is tense. We keep the doors and windows as closed as possible; only people that proved that they were immune are allowed to get out. The bus have being gutted and the chairs remplaced by diner chairs painted white, with a backrest shaped like a giant echec piece, a knight. At first it's full, but after a couple of stop some chairs are empty. I walk trought the bus and see my cousin again, pouting, and a very old friend being pissy about having to stay inside the bus. I get out and go to speak with the driver, who show me that the bus is being fitted on rails to be able to travel through a very steep fall and up, like a roller coaster. I get vertigo looking at the fall and go back inside the bus, wondering if sitting in front will make is worse or better. I decide to sit in the back and my pissy friend is less pissy, and let me sit next to him.

I don't remember exactly when this one was, but it was around early October 2015.

It's one of the lucid fragments I didn't bother to write down at the time.

I don't recall what I dreamed about before, unfortunately... I didn't write it down. Stupid, on my part.

However, right before I woke up, I gained awareness while standing on a cliff. I was surveying a landscape covered with sweeping grass, with the ocean in the distance. I could see the waves breaking on a pebbly shore as the grass rippled in the wind. The sun was rising over the ocean. I decided not to "do" anything but watch the sunrise and be satisfied by such a vivid, solid dream after a night full of dreaming, I mostly just remember very being pleased about it all, as if I had enjoyed my night. I still wish I had written those dreams down, but I know there was some flying involved.

I spent a while peacefully enjoying the ocean breeze while the sun slowly rose over the waves. The sunlight sparkled on the waves and tinged the grasses with a rosy golden glow. The sea wind was cool and salty, with a hint of fresh grass.

Eventually, my alarm clock went off and I had to get up for work.

This happened a while ago but i wanted to post it anyways. I was sleeping in my room when a thunderstorm broke out. For safety reasons I was moved to sleep in the living room a floor lower. I laid on a mattress and fell asleep fast. I was dreaming about me being in a forest at night with some friends walking around on the ground and climbing some trees, idk . The dream was very vivid and i still remember the feeling i had when i walked face first into a spider web.
I had just heard about lucid dreaming at this point and I knew the "hold your nose and breath"-method but also the one about looking at your hands. Suddenly in the dream my friends were nowhere and I was walking down a road still during nighttime. I felt an urge to look at my hand and I did so, only to realize that my hand had like 7 fingers all being kinda blurry and very long. It looked extremely weird and made me panic since it was my first LD. I started running kinda to escape the fear idk. After running for some seconds I woke up. Lying on the mattress in the living room. I was looking around to make sure I was safe and everything looked safe and sound. I was a bit out of breath and wanted to wake my girlfriend lying next to me for some reason. When laying my hand on her shoulder it was STILL looking just as weird as during the lucid dream. I paniced yet again feeling my heart pounding faster and harder. I woke up just after this and looked at my hand first thing, just to find it being normal again.
My first LD experience kinda scared me, but it still drew me in since the experience was so unique from anything i had ever experienced before. I am excited to learn more about this mystical universe

I tried some FILD before falling asleep.
A little after falling asleep I go lucid, surrounded by darkness. I'm unable to keep it up and "fall" into an awake state. I immediately begin falling asleep again but I'm still a bit aware, I feel myself becoming paralyzed. At first this is exciting, I haven't experienced this since childhood. As I lose more and more control I begin to fear a pang of fear, not sure I want to go into SP after all. I begin to try as hard as I can to turn on my stomach and as I do I feel my body lumber toward the left. As I turn I see my body flump over and I'm looking down at it in the dark room, slowly floating up. Thinking this is also a sort of bad idea, I push myself back into my body and fall into the darkness of sleep.

I'm in the shoe department of a department store with some skater dudes. As I follow them I get bored and try to do a handstand but accidentally hit someone in the head with my feet, a father passing by. I feel embarrassed that I did that. The skater kick me on the ground as punishment, I accept it. As they kick me in the face, I feel that it is becoming a bit excessive.

I'm in a large, fancy house. One side of it has large windows that show the street, it's in the city. It's night time and I go up to the second floor where a hall circles the first floor. There is a show on with William Shatner about UFO's. I decide to draw aliens with ink in a notebook, perhaps they will come to life? (??) I draw one from behind, his large black eyes visible from the sides of his head despite it.

Back on the first floor of the house, it's now late afternoon, golden sunlight. There are a bunch of my friends down there. (The house must be one of theirs?) A friend bring chocolate mousse cheesecake, it's really good. I ask a friend of mine I see there if we are going to reschedule our meeting up that we missed last week. She says Tuesday would be good. We can meet in the local McDonald's.

Out back there is a large, fenced backyard with lots of bird cages. I see one on the patio, it has a small delicate bird in it and I feed it. I begin to fly around the backyard, I guess I have a jetpack? I zoom around feeding the various birds in their cages, they are on multiple levels, suspended and resting on large trees. The last of the birds are a bunch of chickens in a coop up on a tree. I try to feed them, but not too much.

I go back to my friends, it's dark outside and they are now out in the yard. My friend complains he ran out of candy, I laugh nervously saying that happens sometimes. His girlfriend seems upset about it and my friend yells out at me for eating so much. I feel a sting of shame.

Out back I see two robots that look like they came from the Warhammer 40K universe. A few criminals, badass skater guys, take me hostage as they drive off in a convertible to escape the law. We drive down the sepia colored evening road, it's like LA. There are two demons with us that look like a few monsters from the Nickelodeon show "Aaahh!!! Real Monsters". They try to drive the guys insane, rubbing up against them as they whisper vile things. "I will be inside you soon...."

So the only thing I remembered last night was I was walking through a forest, and suddenly became lucid out of nowhere. Being thankful of this fact, I got on the ground and started to stabilize the dream by feeling the grass and dirt, and sifting through the individual grains between my fingers. I also began talking to some dream characters. After I settled down, I thought what would be cool to try, so I attempted to create a tiny hill by visualizing the ground slowly moving up. After failing the attempt I sort of felt defeated and tried to do something else and tried to move a tiny stick on the ground using telekinesis, but I also failed at this as well. Getting frustrated with not being able to do anything I tried to start flying because I remembered as a kid being able to do so, but I was completely surprised when I discovered I could not fly anymore either. I started to feel ashamed at myself and that's when I noticed that the forest started to become darker and the trees started disappearing until I was in a dark void.

I immediately began to fall through the void at a fast speed and I hit some kind of invisible ground in the void. I heard a voice that sounded like mine and it told me to stop trying to control the dream because I don't deserve to and I've made him angry by doing so. He said I was pathetic at trying and I'll never be given control. I then suddenly felt extreme panic and chaos and I heard screaming and I started to crouch down in a fetal position and started to cry as I felt more and more in desperation for whatever reason.

I then woke up and felt like crap for the entire day.

For some reason I can't remember any dreams from last night besides this lucid, not even a fragment.

I didn't feel right, so I knew I was dreaming. I was in the living room and was losing it, so I stared at something until it became clearer. The dream was very vivid. It was either early morning or evening, as it was almost dark outside. I looked out the window and it was a winter wonderland, with snow piled like 5 feet high. I tried to summon someone, first by yelling her name 3-4 times. Nothing. Then I remembered the hand behind back technique, so I reached my hand behind me and said, "___, take my hand!" and brought my hand around, but there was no one there. Frustrated, I gave up and went outside. It was quite beautiful out with all the snow. I was going to try my lucid task of going to a roller boogie but woke up in a false awakening and tried to write down my dream.

After quite a while of not remembering dreams I remembered this morning. I remember being in a room and thinking that something was due. I remember coming down a mountain. And I remember kinda hearing music with visuals of arrows going up. The atmosphere of the dream was kinda depressing or gloomy. I think I was fairly lucid this morning and stayed with the dream for quite a while. I got to sleep in. Yay...

*I had great increase in dream recall because I abstained from drinking or smoking just before bed. I've also been watching a lot of LOST and Heroes on Netflix so there are some parallels* Dream #1 Dream #2

I was in this apartment complex with Dr. Mohinder Sharesh (heroes). We were running from these men in black who wanted to capture me and study me for my abilities of teleportation, telekinesis and time travel. My brother, who also can time travel, was already a couple years into the future, and he and I were communicating with this magical paper that I could write on and my brother years in the future could read it, and vice versa. He had told me that there had been a terrible virus spread throughout the world and many people were dead. Dr. Sharesh and I began working on an antidote immediately to prepare for this disaster. I began collecting samples and test tubes from this fridge like container for chemicals. I had told him that we need to work fast to prepare. Just then I looked outside to three floors below, men in black were at that moment getting out of their cars. I closed both doors leading to the room we were in from the hallway outside so that we had a bit more time before the men in black had apprehended us. The next few moments played out like a movie...the men in black busted through the door leading to our floor, guns drawn and ready to shoot at any moment. I close my eyes tight just as the break down the doors to our room. The men found only Dr. Sheresh alone in the room as I had time traveled. *Camera pans to the magical paper with my writing saying "I'm coming to you" and my brother's response, "What?"*

The next thing I know I am in the same building, same floor, and I am in the hallway. The carpet was pulled up from the floor, and the walls beginning to crumble apart. I look around and realize that I had traveled years into the future. Just then, my brother comes running around the hall, with a big smile on his face, happy to see me. He takes my hands and says how happy he is to see me. He had a katana strapped to his back. He takes me into the same room I was in from the past, he sits on a couch, his back to the window. I look at him as we talk, and then I look past him to see the destruction of the city skyline. Towers and buildings were destroyed, reduced to nothing but shells of a once great society. I asked my brother if our parents had survived, his eyes welled up as he shook his head and began to cry. My brother then asked me what time I had come from, I looked him in the eye and said, "I think I came from the time when this all started, I think I came from where it began."

I remember being in some sort of school that was holding a big conference or event. There were a lot of people. I remember being somewhat lucid as I mocked certain situations while still adhering to the dream plot. I was in this large girls' bathroom, remembering that I could do pretty much anything, I challenged every other girl in there to fight me. They kind of looked at me weird and didn't do anything at first. I had said something to the effect of "What, you bitches afraid you all can't take me? Come on! I'll let you all at me at once." That peaked their interest as they all started to attack me. Fighting all of them at once was easy. I blocked every kick and punch with ease, landing blows to them as I did. They quickly surrendered and I left the bathroom. I saw floods of people rushing in every hallway.

The dream shifts and I am now looking out onto Lake Michigan witnessing one of the most beautiful sunsets I have ever seen. There are people playing in the lake as the golden orb of our star slowly lowered itself upon the water, a perfect reflection on the surface. I sat watching with school friends, old and new, in these bleacher style seats, almost like an amphitheater. I sat with a friend of mine to my left, a cute girl that I have come to sort of develop a crush on. Next to her on her left sits one of my old friends from high school. I was peaceful, taking in the beautiful scene before me. Then, the cute girl next to me rests her head on my shoulder, and I instinctively put my arm around her waist. The cute girl was also holding the hand of the girl next to her which was my high school friend, but being polyamorous, I wasn't hurt or angry at that situation. Then I had realized something, I had been in another dream just before that, a different dimension with a dire fate. I hopped up and began putting some pieces together. I said to the cute girl "Are you my constant? Are you here to simply comfort me and distract me from my task, so that I may stay in this world and forget the world before?" The girl just hung her head and looked at her feet. I sat right in front of her, put my face next to hers so I could whisper in her ear, "Are you my constant?" to which she said "I can't say". I just nodded my head thinking 'I knew it'. Then I asked, "do you like me, do you love me?" She didn't respond. I just got up, said I was getting lunch and left the scene.

I was back at the music building of my school, practicing my saxophone, and actually playing a scale I had been working on IRL. It was then that I remembered I was getting food.

I woke up