lucid

Created Sunday 22 March 2020

Got a DILD and some scraps today.

Scrap Group 1
Something about going to a shopping center located atop a hill.

Vaguely recall playing Demon RL.

Dream 1 - Break Valley

Dreamlet to dream. The visuals were clear. I was laying supine outdoors, looking up at a bright blue, partially cloudy sky. Soon, I noticed the moon, only it was behaving erratically. That is, it was zooming in and out at rapid speeds. This brought instant awareness.

I fly towards moon, but it vanishes. So, I opt to just soar through the clouds. Noticed sensations and noises of this act were quite faint, with the sole exception of heavy moisture. After a few minutes dancing in the air, I dive down on land again. I find myself on grassy hill land, sparse on foliage but no shortage of other greenery. This sight made me unconsciously play Sky Santuary's theme from Sonic & Knuckles in the background. I let myself enjoy the view for a moment, when the surroundings took on blocky textures. Eh, whatevs. I won't let that bother me now.

Alright, sightseeing over. Time for some random mayhem! Using telekinesis, I lifted a tree about 30 yards away, then hurled towards a mossy mountains about a mile away. The tree pierced through, and seconds later, the entire hill crumbled down. Noticed there was an unsatisfying lack of sound. I repeated this several more times on different hills, if only to get some noise going. Got bored of the trite view around this point. So I forcefully warped the scene to take on more realistic visuals. Anyway, I asploded a mountain once more, only this time, I struck it with dozens of trees simultaneously.

Real life noises distracted me from the dream. I woke up seconds later.

Created Saturday 21 March 2020

Got a DILD and a fragment today.

Scrap Group 1
Driving through a highway during a cloudy day. Cut to my entering a parking garage. Suddenly, I was seized by mysterious figures. A top down view of the scene is shown, revealing I was attacked by two savage female vampires dressed in ancient rags. Rewind after I was killed. The scene repeats in first person view. But now, I simply ignored my assailants, treating them as mild annoyances even as they drained me.

Dream 1 - The Key to Enlightenment

The visuals were slightly blurred. I was in the living room at home. M was there, as was an unknown figure, a man who was a supposed acquaintance of ours.

We sat down to eat an overtly bright-colored frosted cake. Suddenly, a bunch of firefighters and emergency crew burst into the scene. They claimed there was some major hazard that needed to be dealt with, and as such, required everyone to evacuate immediately. As part of some kind of arrangement, this lady cop, light skinned, light brown hair, short, stout, and about my age, instructed me to go with her for a ride to a destination of my choosing.

Soon, the two of us departed within a police cruiser. Much of the surroundings looked unfamiliar to me. All homes had a good distance between them, and the roads had singular lanes on each sides of opposing traffic. For most of the ride, we remained uncomfortably silent, broken only by some occasional small talk. Minutes later, we arrive in a parking garage. I begin dismounting, when the policewoman showed sudden interest in me. Had mixed feelings on that, including flattery, but mostly just confusion. I stammered my thoughts before slinking away.

Cut to my walking through a dark hallway. This soon opens up into a vast, multi-story atrium. Dark wood balconies were divided into sections, each of which contained what appeared as small classrooms hosting 12 late teen students or fewer. Staff and students alike were dressed in professional wear. I looked around for a few minutes, when I suddenly had the urge to start floating around, doing so while seated in a meditative pose. I could glance the occasional double take and dumbfounded stares from the others. In any case, this act brought instant awareness.

As per my goals, I sought for a way to dilate time. As I looked around, I noticed another figure levitating figure above me. This individual was further distinct from his pitch black suit, albino skin, bald head, and youthful appearance (indeed, he seemed more like a tall and skinny middle school aged kid if anything). I approach him, to be immediately met with a query.

"You seek knowledge, yes?", asks the boy in a soothing, near-whispered tone. I nodded. The enigma then pulled out an object from his pocket, a large brazen key of antiquated design. He holds it out in the palm of his hand, and continues. "This is The Key to Enlightenment". I take it, feeling a strange combination of anticipation and worry. The child suddenly stares at me intently, then continues. "However, you must find The Entrance yourself." I nodded again, and set off quickly to do just that.

It didn't take long for me to notice something unusual in the ceiling. Murals, each depicting natural symbols such as leaves. However, it so happened some of the art was actually gilded engravings. Furthermore, on closer scrutiny, within one such engraving was a cleverly hidden keyhole. I zoom in, but notice the opening is obviously not compatible with the key I'd in hand.

I only had a moment to ponder this, when explosions rocked the hall. Bright flashes erupted from the ground, incinerating anything it came in contact to ashes. I could hear repeated calls amidst screams of horror. "Sorcerers! Sorcerer!" But I wasn't in the fighting or curious mood. In fact, I feared losing any chance of finding this supposed Entrance. So I allowed others to take care of the problem, and phased out of the site...

I found myself in the garage again, only now, it was completely unlit. As I bumbled around mid-air, I come upon a locked maintenance door. Incidentally, there happened to be an unusually large doorlock. I tested the key out in it, and lo and behold, it fit! Opening it revealed a white void. I floated through, eager hope filling my thoughts. Unfortunately, such excitement made me unconscious. I don't recall how this ended, only that I woke up a half minute later.

Created Friday 20 March 2020

Been so long since I actually wrote up any dreams on the actual site. Guess now as is good as time as any. But anyway, I have much to write about today. Feels quite relieving, if I'm honest. Recall could be a bit better, but hey, it's still a far sight than what I've been getting these last two weeks or so...

Spoiler for Lotsa Spaghetti...er, words:

Scrap Group 1
In a mall. Jacob was there as well. Neon lights brightened the shop entrances and decorated much of the interior. Along our route, I mention trying to find a supposed buffet we went to before, though Jaboc was reluctant to eat so much. I got aware around that point. Even so, I opt to find the buffet, looking for over a minute until the dream fades.

Two short, uh, NSFW LDs.

Dream 1 - Ephermeral Eats, Still Construct

The visuals were a bit dim and blurred. I was in the lounge at home.

Things were notably different. Much of the furniture was missing, and the sofa there was brown, smaller, and generally unfamiliar. There was also a short, long wooden table. A spread of fried foods was set atop. I sat down, and tried a fried pastry of some sort. However, the food vanished as soon as I bit into it.

I then attempted to conjure TPD. She soon appeared in view, though flickered in and out of sight. It took a bit of concentration before she manifested entirely. The construct fell on the couch, her head across my lap. Rather than flaming hair, she possessed a crown as black as her cold exterior. TPD didn't say anything, just staring at me, waiting for input. I couldn't think of much else than repeat my previous dreams, and some yammering on future dream goals.

I went on for minutes before the dream faded. DEILD transition.

Dream 2 - Crisp Iceburg Lettuce

The visuals were bright, but stil blurred. I was in a white void. Soon, an SUV pulled up beside me. I opened the back door to find a bunch of groceries. Thinking of the TOTMs, I sift through the bags, until I find a head of lettuce (iceburg lettuce, if I'm correct). It was deceptively cold to keep in hand, freezing, in fact. I wasted no time chowing down. Although cold, it was actually really easy to bite into. Crisp, yet quite moist. Of taste, it was faintly earthy, not too bitter, more like drinking cucumber water rather than biting into a raw vegetable. It was really easy to go down, so much so that I at it all in three bites.

The dream faded shortly after. DEILD transition.

Dream 3 - Quick FPS Indulgence

The visuals were a bit blurred. I was running around in some kind of futuristic industrial site, blinking panels and exposed pipes lining chrome-covered surfaces. I also noticed both my donning a suit of power armor and a wielding a laser rifle.

Not long into this, I found myself under fire. A wild gunfight was taking place. Half a dozen or so other figures were zooming around, each armed and armored similar to myself. Figured this was a FPS scenario of some sort. No sense not indulging. I was rather incautious: where others took over, I merely struck out in the open, firing away at random. I acknowledged how improbably lucky I was not to get shot once.

This went on for a few minutes. Think I managed two kills (the other guys were quite hardy) before the dream collapsed. DEILD transition.

Dream 4 - Sky Hill Skiing

The visuals started almost pitch black. DEILD transition in bed. I roll to the side, and fell into a white void. I tried flying around, only to slide atop an unknown surface.

Soon, I found myself skiing down a snowy slope. I descended for over 1000ft, when the hill suddenly crested up at the edge. Somehow, I was launched straight to the clouds. I spun around, and even did some side-flips and back-flips for good measure. Then, from out of nowhere, I randomly acquired a laser pistol. I shrugged, and fired at the clouds surrounding me.

Things got really hazy. Don't recall how this dream ended. Tried DEILDing when I woke up, but I lost consciousness.


Scrap Group 2
At home. I was watching Jacob play some indie-developed game. It seemed to use graphics from various different sources, including the Demon roguelike. Yet somehow, the game could also create new graphics with assets that was fed to it on the spot, a feature I acknowledged at the time. It otherwise played as a ho-hum platformer RPG. Anyway, from the aforementioned roguelike, I noticed Reprobus was on screen. This got me to ramble on about the boss battle with him and Mordecai. DEILD after I woke up.

Dream 5 - Death to Reprobus

The visuals were a bit blurred and dim. I was walking down a dark hallway. Soon, the passage opened up into a rectangular stadium made of earth and stone. Despite its ancient type of construction, it looked impressively well maintained. Regardless, the site was abandoned.

I immediately recalled that frustrating Reprobus boss fight, my hatred towards the character, and furthermore, my disdain of the mythological figure that inspired him. And so, I conjured a being in his likeness. Unexpectedly, it'd appeared like some live-action furry, which only served to further fuel my ire further. It was around then that I noticed my having a hulking musculature, and my wielding an huge axe.

Obviously, I attacked, charging at the figure. In one swing, I chopped the creature in half through the hip. But I wouldn't stop there. I created many other clones of Reprobus, each making goading postures more obnoxious than the last. The nearest one had the displeasure of having his head lopped off. Before his body fell, I grabbed it, leaped several stories upwards, then chucked it into the dirt, whereupon it exploded into a gory mess. Similar carnage followed with each subsequent copies. My only disappointment was that none of these reprobates seemed to fight back.

Don't recall how this ended. I tried DEILDing again, but lost awareness once more.

Dream 6 - The Littlest Home Invader

The visuals were dim. I was at the front seat of a vehicle, which itself was parked near a small house isolated from civilization, starless night sky above. Cast-iron gates surrounded much of the structure plus its yard.

There was a pre-adolescent girl in the vehicle, light skinned, wavy brown hair, eyes very wide. In fact, she looked quite similar to my cousin Cassandra in her youth. Soon, the girl speaks about the denizens of the nearby house, none of it all too pleasant. She mentions how the people there became wealthy due to predatory lending schemes. Among their victims was the girl's own family. As part of payment, the girl had to give up something of hers, something that she highly regarded. Our reason for being there was plainly apparent: she planned to steal the item back.

It seems I had knowledge on security details about the dwelling. I identified the safest access point was in one of the gates to the backyard, the one closest to the main entrance. Unlike the other doors, which would trigger an alarm when unauthorized figures touched it, that gate would only sound an alarm if it were tampered with unsuccessfully. However, I warned her that only a skilled locksmith would be able to pull off such a task, not to mention that she'd somehow have to sneak past world class private security keeping an eye on the place. The girl looked terrified, yet I knew from the look of her eye that she wasn't going to back down.

Timeskip. Things appear from her viewpoint. The girl sneaks towards the designated gate. She tries picking the lock, but it was quite obvious she had no idea how to do that. Cue the alarms. Fittingly, the Tanker Alert Theme from Metal Gear Solid 2 sounded in the background, and continued throughout the rest of the dream. In any case, the girl flees into the thickets within the nearby forest.

Timeskip again. Spectator mode. The girl could now be seen hurrying through the streets of an industrial urban area. She looked to be at the point of collapsing. Using what little strength she had left, she climbed over a chain link fence into a dark alleyway. The girl then ducks down under a nearby stairway. Seconds later, another figure surveys the area. A security personnel. This was a hard-faced 40 year old woman, light skinned, athletically built, hair tied beneath a cap. The guard searched thoroughly around the site for well over three minutes. It seemed she was about to go elsewhere, when suddenly, she spots the girl.

The suspense wakes me up.

Really bad headache last night, but had some semi-lucid dream as I fell asleep. Haven't been making note of dreams very much in the last few days on account of going through a phase of being too tired on waking and too many mornings having their routines disrupted.

Edit: Somehow nearly forgot an important detail here; While I was in bed trying to fall asleep I did try to incubate dreams about working on my paintings again, my thoughts on this passed fairly early on and I got distracted with other thoughts, getting somewhat vivid music and other sleep cues instead but I suppose the lucid dream did relate directly to the incubation intent. I thought I'd try working on the incubation anyway because of my headache, and it did help to distract me from it.

---

Lucid fragment (on falling asleep):

I didn't notice the transition from wakefulness to dream imagery but I was in a bigger version of our front room. It was day time, my paints and the table I keep them on were there and I remember the big window. I don't think the canvas I've been working on was there. I half realised I was dreaming and walked or ran forward into the room, towards the opposite wall, which is a corner where I keep a bunch of my stuff for painting, but in the dream context it's like there would be a door there or something, even though I couldn't see it yet; I carried out some hand checks as I moved even though I was already in a type of lucidity but the stability started to go pretty quickly and I lost my half-lucid state. Sort of faded away in terms of recall after that.

The only thing I remember after that is a gap of nothingness and then some dreams from the morning, that again I didn't turn into notes.

Go into ‘Nana’s house’, call for her but she seems to not be there, it’s dark, (it’s basically Kandy crescent house, but not fully,) I go around looking for something, but weird things start happening: in the dim light I can just see a chest of drawers come sliding down the hallway, and either it bumps into me or I kick it; I kick it and the drawers fly out. I call out “who’s there?”, “Nana?” and “stop it!” Soon I start to walk down hallway to leave, and more things happen, things just fly around, I might scream, I hear noises, and I might shout at them. I think I still ask about Nana; do I ask if she’s here, if she’s ok? I know I need to leave this house. Outside, I’m flying, and it soon occurs to me that I’m dreaming. I’m aware of this for a few seconds before I decide to actually stop what I’m doing and do what I want to do. Then I’m like, ok, be lucid, I’m lucid, and then I go down on the ground and I think of eating lettuce, a basic task of the month. I basically am on a mission now, I expect a fridge is where I’ll find lettuce so I find a house, actually I think I go back into the same house, but I am hoping it will look different to before, and it does. I go to the kitchen, open the fridge, on my way to there I'm sort of rushing, thinking I want to get it done fast before I lose focus and forget or wake up, but then the rushing means I’m not even experiencing everything I’m doing, so I force myself to slow down, and think about what I’m feeling and seeing as I open the fridge, hoping to kind of move at the same speed as my body, not letting it get ahead of me. I seem to remember seeing carrots, but don’t think I do anything with them. I decide to open a tub of margarine and scrape some up in my fingers, hoping I can smell and taste it strongly and be anchored more in the dream. I sniff it but can’t smell it, it barely has a scent. I give up, must somehow get the butter off my hands (I don’t remember, perhaps I just forget it’s there), and then look to find some lettuce; on the bottom shelf, on the left, see a lettuce, or a third of one, the bottom third, but it’s a lettuce nonetheless, I’m sure, not cabbage, and I pick it up and take a bite - suddenly outside again? - and I’m feeling pretty amazed and on top of the world because I just for the first time ever completed a task in the correct month and it feels good. I take another bite or two of the lettuce. It’s quite thin leaves, or the first was, but it still feels ok, not like rubbery or old. I don’t focus very much on the taste or texture. Then there’s something about Mum, and Adam? I think of other goals, there’s a person here and I try to think of a lucid goal involving them (though there might not really be any)? Expect I soon lose lucidity.
At like a little beach or lake, with my mother (maybe Jenn Husser from Claws) and others, I start to notice and get suspicious about part of the water, basically the part of the beach/shore next to a building the others are standing nearer to, so from where they are they can’t so much see it, but a few dogs are standing on the shore, maybe first just a couple and they’re barking, and also another person - Polly? nah maybe not - says something about it. I’m getting ahead of myself - I think first, I’m suspicious, but can’t prove anything to myself, and finally the other person points things out, points out the bones which confirm my suspicion that my mother/Jenn (if that’s who it is) killed her sister and this is where.
Ask Polly about other woman’s, my mother’s, sister, who died, if she knows anything about it; remember as I'm about to ask that it was Polly's sister who died; ask anyway, hoping I might still be right about that. Polly’s face changes a bit like she’s thinking about it and worried and then she quietly says ‘yes’, tells me about it? Or her telling me yes is enough for me. Then I go into the room, upstairs (?), and Polly comes too, and are we packing? Preparing to leave?

Chaos. Memorable moments. Lots of false awakenings, 3 LDs. No techniques used, just enough sleep after a short night before.

In the fourth sleep cycle (probably) I had a long dream of some action movie stuff. It wasn't lucid but there was an ever increasing underlying knowledge of being in a dream. When I was driving in a car in an obviously unrealistic setting (jumping across a large gap) it suddenly clicked and I felt lucidity setting in. I remembered to try rubbing my hands together to stabilize the dream and did so. Everything I was looking at got crystal clear and I got even more conscious, too. Maybe I was too aware because the dream ended shortly after. It was so short I'll not even count this as full lucid dream.

In the next sleep cycle I had another long non-lucid dream where I was at my old school. After some time I realized that it wasn't normal for cars driving around the school office and down the stairs (btw, what's going on with cars this night?!). I wasn't fully lucid up to now but as I went down the corridor my awareness increased. I went towards my former classroom and greeted some classmates on the way. All of them were very friendly which is rather rare amongst my DCs (when I'm lucid). In the classroom there were lots of people, a wild mix from different times of school, university and work. Most of them were no close friends or I didn't remember their names at all, so I looked out for more familiar faces. Turning around I found an old friend I've lost contact to since then. I went towards her and hugged her; she wouldn't let go for quite some time.
Then, I remembered that I planned to have some deeper conversations with DCs and - in this setting - I thought it would be a good idea to have a philosophy lesson next. The dream obeyed: one of my former philosophy teachers walked through the door (not the one I had expected but still). Sadly I never got to discuss anything there as I woke up.

I'm not sure how much time passed but eventually I found myself back in bed apparently awake but suspecting a false awakening. I did the nose pinch RC repeatedly but the results weren't clear, breathing was quite difficult. Then I noticed my mother standing in the room talking to me which was rather unlikely but no clear indication either. I needed to prove my dream state somehow and swung my arms forwards - they went right through her body. Now I could be sure and she disappeared.
I was walking towards my computer when everything changed all of a sudden. It's somewhat hard to describe but it felt as if I went through different dream settings one after the other at light speed. I couldn't notice any details as it changed too fast; they were just like three dimensional pictures raining on me or maybe I was travelling through these 'rooms'. Perhaps this is similar to what people experience when they talk about seeing their life flash before their eyes, I can't tell.
Anyway, I knew this would be a chance to dive deeper into my subconscious. After some moments my travel came to an end and I found myself standing on a deserted street. A female soldier was walking towards me in a resolute manner, holding something in her hand. I somehow knew what had to be done to go deeper: I had to die.
She got closer and I tried to remain as calm as possible as she stabbed me with the dagger in her hand. There was no pain, I simply sank to the ground. Suddenly I was back at my computer and it felt as if I was only playing a video game. But here I too got down onto the floor and died.
Then, I was back in bed. I RCed again, this time clearly indicating the false awakening, though moving my arm felt far too real. I was in a weird state of consciousness and so it was easy to let go and continue on my previous path. The surroundings changed and I was standing on top of a skyscraper. Once again I knew what to do: this time I had to jump down.
But I never got to do it as something else got in the way. With every step I took towards the abyss I felt more and more (sexually?) aroused. This has never happened before in a LD. It was an utterly primal feeling and in the end it got almost too intense. I woke up with my whole body tingling.

Unintentional WBTB of 2 hours after ~5 hours of sleep. Already expected this leading to a LD, didn't take long...
At first I had an annoying non-lucid dream in which I got more and more conscious over time. In the end I went kinda lucid while having breakfast with some family members in a gym, but I kept slipping in and out of the dream. As I was rather stressed out due to previous events I wanted to calm down and so I imagined the tea I was just drinking to have relaxing psychoactive properties. The effect hit me immediately and was way stronger than I had expected; I felt a huge shift in my awareness. I wonder what kind of chemicals my brain did release here.
Next, I was back in my bed and for some moments I can't say for sure what was real and what was not. When I felt our cat licking my left arm I realized I must already be dreaming because she couldn't be around. I got up and looked around, it was pitch dark so I decided to go outside. I wanted to leave trough the window/wall but - once again - things seemed solid, it even hurt a bit running against the wall... To convince myself of being in a dream (which I doubted after that) and to increase lucidity I RCed in the most mindful manner. It worked and I could successful jump out of the window. On the other side I somehow kept floating a metre above the ground. I just stayed up in the air and carefully flew around the garden outside. Looking down I realized how absurdly real my surroundings seemed once again, except that they were more colorful than in reality. I flew through some branches of a large tree and dove down onto the ground to pick some flowers. Then, I pondered what to do next - and felt the dream fading.

I had a LD , I just knew I was dreaming
I was in some kind of greenhouse, a blonde woman materialized before me (nothing lewd) and kept pestering me
I didn't really understand what she was saying cuz I couldnt fully stabilize the dream and focus , I for some reason didnt see most colours btw, but I knew she was proably insulting me or trying to distract me

I had a bit problems to get away from my body, I guess, my concentration wasn't great today. But after a few tries I managed.
Once I stood in dark bedroom, I have heard strange buzzing sound... So I followed it to the source. I got to bedroom of my older daughters... And over the second oldest sleeping body I saw something like black filaments, about 5cm wide, and moving a bit. The strange loud buzzing was emanating from them. I put my hands on them and pulled them with a bit difficulty away. The buzzing sound got louder at first and then it ceased... And filaments dissipated and I found myself back in my body.
Immediately I went out of body again and walked back to my daughter bed. There were no filaments anymore. I put my hands on and then into my daughter body, trying to pull her out of body, but I didn't manage that.
So, i went out of house through closed balcony doors(I wasn't able to open those doors, as usually..) I had fallen down from first floor height and walked without thinking about that concentrated on here and now...

Today i had many dreams. I also slept like 10 hours and in the last couple of hours i had a lucid dream (which broke a long dry spell). I'm going to write the lucid dream first and then if i have time i'll write notes on the other dreams.

I was dreaming that i was in Córdoba (the capital city of my province). I was in the neighborhood i was living in last year, and i was buying some dinner. I asked for cheese and the price was like 5x$5.80 or something (and 5 weren't even the units of cheese, but rather a marketing thing to make it hard to figure out what the actual price was XD). Then i saw some fresh pasta in the counter and i asked for some of that. I grabbed some with my hands to put it in a plastic bag XD and then the guy that was attending me started to mess around with it too, like grabbing a fork and tasting some (even though it had to get cooked). I was totally chill about it, but i said something pointing out that we were being savages about it, lol. Then i went out and started walking towards my house.

Then i find myself in the avenue. It was by the time the shops closed and the sun was setting. There was a car chasing me and i had like a feeling this happened before and i was ran over by it. The car was going around the block. And this time i started running before "the last time" so i was ahead this time. I started running towards my house and then i turned left when i reached the end of the first block. I thought the car would appear in front of me in a few minutes, but then i realized that i could fly because this was a dream, and so as i was running i started floating and flying, and that way the car would never run over me. Even if the car flew, i imagined it would fly like cars in GTA San Andreas, highly erratic so it was all good. The view was nice too. The road was a dirt road; at my left there were buildings like apartments, and at my right there was just grass but ahead there was like a small plantation of trees and they were pretty tall. I remembered that it would be a good idea to use my senses so i get the dream to last longer. So since i was at about the altitude of a nearby balcony i floated towards it, held to the wall (which felt so real) and climbed it. Btw i was super vigilant while i was flying because in past dreams it happened that sometimes i lost power and started going down, so i was constantly aware if this would happen anytime while i was flying, but everything went smooth (if i went down it would be okay, because what actually 'disturbs' me more of falling is how long the fall is rather than hitting the ground, and i wasn't that high yet). When i stood in the balcony mini wall i noticed there was a lamp post nearby, and i could reach the lamp so i went ahead and touched it. The lamp was cold, even though it was lit. I thought that was funny and it was something more to keep confident that this was a dream. I didn't know what i wanted, but i wanted to do something, and i was getting bored there. So i started flying again, now towards the trees. I almost reached the top of the trees when i thought that i should have a new goal now, so i thought why not the moon (even though deep down i was thinking this might not be a good idea, since it would be a huge step for me). So i changed the direction of where i was flying to (the moon was in my back) and i started heading towards it. I saw it from afar and i thought it would be a long flight, perhaps not even worth it, but i wanted to do it for the challenge rather than being there (i also thought that space would be a problem because i would have to focus not only on flying but also on breathing... and that could be problematic) but i couldn't fly much higher than i was at that moment because i started spiraling down and shortly after i woke up. When i woke up i stayed still and i went back into dreaming shortly after. Like in 1 minute after i was back in a new dream, but i didnt even notice that it was already dreaming, i thought that i was just thinking this. I realized it has been a dream only when i woke up from it. In that dream i was in an abandoned house, with some old members of some fraternity. They wanted to threaten me, and philosophize about something. The one that was talking was a dark wizard, but as far as i was concerned he was as much human being as me so i never felt threatened or fearful of the situation.

Morning of March 8, 2020. Sunday.

Dream #: 19,438-01. Reading time: 54 sec.



In my transition from complete lucidity to liminality near the beginning of my dreaming experience, I think about the nature of imaginary physicality, though it does not correlate with the usual falling sensation anticipation.

As the rapid morphing of various random settings slows and stabilizes, I see a variation of the “Gunsmoke” Dodge City set, though its implication is ambiguous, as both people on horses and modern cars are present and in motion. I know that horses are more of an instinctual rendering when imaginary proprioception is an anticipated factor, whereas cars, although still signifying the physical body as sublimated while dreaming, indicate a partial level of cognizance. As a result, my liminal state integrates the ambiguity of both in an atypical form of sleep-wake mediation.

What results, as I am moving into my sleep cycle instead of out of it, is that all the cars unrealistically rotate, reminiscent of a tornado, ballerina’s pirouette, or helicopter rotor system (all of which are variations of mediating this process) as I allow my lucidity to lessen. There is no emotion as only one horse bucks at the impossible scene (only because I briefly anticipate it). The cars do not lift off the ground but rapidly rotate in place until their spinning makes them a seemingly transparent circular anomaly. After a few minutes, I allow the scene to fade.

---

First night of having two unrelated lucid dreams! I didn't use any specific technique, only had some deep meditation before bed.

After about six hours of sleep I had a long non-lucid dream taking place at my parents' house. It was rather uneventful and a bit annoying. When I finally went lucid I was just standing in the kitchen discussing something with my parents. I don't know what triggered lucidity and I didn't even need to RC as I was immediately sure (and I knew I was at my home in reality). As I had enough of that nonsense dream I turned around and walked away, straight through the closed door. I wondered if my parents would comment on me leaving like this but only my mother yelled: "Come back here!" Btw, she wouldn't talk to me like that irl.
Outside I looked around and inspected some of the neighbors' gardens. In front of me was a small, overgrown area with lots of bushes and other plants, to the left a larger lawn with only some flowerbeds at the edges. The overgrown garden seemed more interesting to me, so I went there. It was full of large blooming bushes, smaller flowers and lots of other green stuff. I remembered that I had planned to taste something in a LD, so I took a large white blossom from a bush taller than me with dark green leaves and slowly ate one petal after the other while walking around the garden. It looked similar to a rose blossom and tasted, well, somewhat flowery, but also delicate and slightly resinous and sweet. For quite some time the dream was stable and very vivid but eventually I thought of me sleeping irl and slowly woke up.

In the next sleep cycle I had a long dream once again, this time about travelling. I can't recall the details but at one point I looked into the sky and a strange shape was flying above me: two helicopters with an empty seat between them, held by a number of ropes. It looked exciting but also dangerous to fly like that over the landscapes. The next moment I was lucid and didn't care about the risk anymore, so I teleported into the seat somehow (no idea how exactly).
There I was flying with enormous speed above fields and villages, with a stunning view. I opened my arms wide and also stretched my legs, so that I felt the wind intensely. In the meantime the helicopters had transformed into two people flying alongside me (I think they had jetpacks but I didn't check) holding me by my arms. The wind under my feet was so strong it almost felt solid. We were going even faster than before, soon reaching the coastline and flying over the sea. Here, we went down to the water surface, so that the whole thing resembled a weird kind of waterskiing. A mother and her daughter were looking from the beach, saying: "That looks like lots of fun!" The water was crystal clear and I could see sandbanks and seaweeds beneath me. Just when I wondered if there were jellyfish as well, I woke up.

After several days of being sleep deprived this was my first night of getting enough sleep again. So, I wasn't completely surprised when I had a couple of false awakenings in the last sleep cycle. As far as I remember I recognized all of these sooner or later but every time I went lucid the dream would reset to waking up in bed (at my parents' house). There I was hardly able to move most times, with both the dream and my lucidity being somewhat unstable. After some repetitions this got quite frustating.
Annoyed I fought my way out of bed and crossed the room. All I wanted to do then was get outside, so I just walked on to the wall. Furniture got in the way, so I simply said 'everthing is immaterial' and went right through. I got outside but it was very dark and the dream started to collapse. Quickly I got down on my hands and knees, running my fingers through the grass.
At this point the dream reset again and I was suddenly on my bed, still on hands and knees and feeling the grass beneath me. Somehow my vision and sense of touch got out of sync here. Otherwise the stabilization technique worked, the dream felt stable and I was completely lucid at last. Sadly, my alarm went off at this point... But this led to a strange, intriguing situation: I was still in the dream, fully aware and hearing the ringing 'from reality'. I wondered if I could just ignore it and carry on but once again I couldn't move anymore, so I gave in and let myself wake up.

Went back to a half sleep after waking in the morning. Had a small moment of lucidity, the first one for quite some time. Made note of as much as I could before I had to get up to help with something.

---

Dream Fragment:

The only dream I can vaguely remember before my first awakening. Something about a character that walks around some snowy place, finds something and goes back to the past in a pretty stereotypical UFO. Lands at the same place and stumbles on the snow and becomes sort of blue? I expect him to meet himself again but he doesn't, instead meeting an old man. They talk.

They have a discussion about time travel and the past. The man is skeptical but then the other character says something that convinces him and the man states "it's 1976" and the other one says "I came from 2070" or a similar year. He tells the man about how in the future the knowledge of the past, after a certain point, is just unknown. He tries to convince the old man of this by stating facts about history, going back, up to the point where he simply didn't know anything else.

Dream:

As I fell back asleep slowly, the dream seemed to progress quickly. I was half aware of my real body at a few points and the clarity of the visuals varied quite a bit. I was with H somewhere.

There was this guy and his dad, they weren't very happy with each other. The son was dating a teacher, a woman, at his school. Then she found out that his dad was married and that mattered for some reason.

I remember walking outside, near these people. They sort of became part of the background of what was going on and I notice the area is by a large river, or sea. There are quays and the area looks like a port or dock. It's sunny and there are a few large white clouds in the distance.

Me and H, we walk towards a building closer to the dock area. I don't remember walking in, but we're inside. It's a large room, much darker than being outside but there are bits of sunlight here and there, but I don't notice where they come through. There are quite a few people here, this feels like a lobby, or waiting room, for departures?

On the right-hand wall, there's a massive hole and strange rocky formation. I approach it and notice how smooth it is. I look inside, it looks perfectly smooth and the rock is a yellowed off-white but there are tinges of green here and there. There are smaller but perfectly smooth and rounded holes on the rock. It reminds me of pumice and it made me think that lava made this hole. I visualise that happening? Not sure.

I walk outside, as there is a door or passageway next to the hole. This wall of the building was actually some sort of dark tinted glass, and I could already see from inside that this side was some sort of canyon.

There are paths along either side, but there are no connections between these paths except for the lobby place. The rock is all the same as the one from the "volcanic hole". I remember looking at the cliff tops higher than us and noticing the sky looks green-ish. But as I walk here, I realise, wait, how was that hole there? It just wasn't right. I half realise I'm dreaming and at this point I feel my real body more, but in the dream I check my hands. Although they appear normal, there seems to be little detail and I realise I'm dreaming.

The realisation is quickly overpowered by a bunch of random actions, my level of lucidity actually being very low. As if it were a game, I start placing a prop over and over again, along the canyon path I'm on. The prop is a study desk with drawers, with a chair too. H then tells me we don't need them for some reason. My dream awareness starts to go again at this point. I start smashing the chairs against the edge of the cliff and throwing the stuff down the ravine. It all hits the ground too quickly for how deep this place looks and I complain out loud to H "this is a dream, that's a deep canyon, the chairs shouldn't be dropping a metre and then smashing, that's too quick!", half with the expectation that something would change about it, but nothing did. We keep smashing and throwing the furniture for a while, after which I've lost any amount of awareness I had left and we return to the dream plot.

At the end of the path is a similar building. We go in, and it's dark. Again it also had an entrance on the other side of the canyon where the second path was. Inside it looks like someone's private office. Well decorated and tidy, the walls had a mix of plasterwork and floral motif patterned wallpaper.

The wall at the other end of the room, behind a desk and so on, seemed solid, but as we approached, it smashed or crumbled. On the other side is a lobby full of people, at a lower height, but not much. I talk to H, but don't remember what we said exactly, except that I expressed some concerns about dealing with these people. They were university students. There were a bunch of signs and notices in the room, mostly about events?

I decide that we can proceed and I step over the rubble and walk down a small ramp made by the rubble. A girl, not much younger than me, sees me and when I comment something to H she says "well we don't want you here anyway, you look like a scary punk!". I feel complimented and somehow her comment made me feel more confident. I approach her and put my hands on her shoulders and smile, in a half attempt to scare her a bit more and in a half attempt to thank her.

I then walk away towards a corridor that took a right turn on the opposite side of the room, but I don't remember any more details.

---

No notes for now, quite tired.

I am by the lake at my old house, where I become lucid simply by virtue of being there, having instilled into myself that I should reality check every time I arrive at anywhere related to my old house or the town I used to live in. It is summertime, there are numerous lush plants growing everywhere. The sky is an odd mixture of green, brown and yellow with two suns. The dream is very unstable. It feels like I'm looking down a tunnel, things feel dark and things tend to shift quite drastically if I look away from them and look back again.

I decide to summon Manei, having missed my longtime dream guide/companion in the time that I have not been lucid dreaming. I summon her and I hear a voice saying it will take her some time to manifest into the dream and that I should please be patient. I oblige and seat myself at the edge of the water. I observe the unstable nature of the dream and am quite pessimistic about the dream remaining stable and lucid long enough for her to manifest, growing irritated at how long it is taking.

Eventually she surfaces near the middle of the lake and swims over to me, getting out of the water. She is short, bloated and completely naked and her physical form is convulsing strangely physical features change each time I look at them, undergoing all sorts of typical dream body horror such as extra body parts or missing body parts, the specifics of which I do not recall. She explains to me that she is unstable, though I am just happy that the dream held together long enough and that she was actually able to manifest. I ask her what I can do to help her become more stable and she says that simply keeping present in the dream will allow her to rebuild stability. I agree to do this, we begin to walk and talk, but something triggers intense anger and I fly away. I remember shunting the angry energy directly downwards for propulsion.

The dream scene transitions to the interior of my junior high, specifically one of the stairwells. The dream has distorted to where the stairwell was many stories tall (it was only two IRL). Manei and I are jumping on the stair rails and sliding down them. The assistant principal shows up, and starts to yell at us for misbehaving but being lucid, I do not care.

...

I am at a store that allows one to design and build rockets. It's very reminiscent of something from a game like Kerbal Space Program in that you can buy these prefabricated pieces that just click together and there is this computer software that lets one order custom rocketry components. I also notice they sell big cylinders of styrofoam and ask about this. Apparently, it has something to do with fuel pressure.