nightmare

i have no control

in a eternal death dream mind for the people who commit adultry will suffer the consequences of an evole nightmare for eternity evertime they commit adultry

i close my eye for the most haunting desire the most horrendeous faces the evole forms of death in a eternal reality as i dream and my unconsicous desire of the haunting faces and the eternal death before me evoles into a more horrendeous death emotion

in a eternal death state you will never be able to wake from your ultimate fears they will consume your every thought as you die amplified horror will occur as every fear you ever haved

First dream

Sanctuary world from Diablo series merged with reality. My home was at the middle of hell, near the river of fire. With my older sister we were hunting demons for gold and unique items, to have money for survival in the new world. Somehow we were passing the river of fire by using a wooden boat.

Second dream

I was watching my younger sister playing minecraft. She was falling off the mountains, but she landed safely. Then she was digging a shelter.

Third dream

With six another dwarves we were banned from mountainhomes. They gave us airplane to fly away. I was a pilot. With a bit difficulty I controlled the airplane. When we were low on fuel I decided to land. We landed on a valley, in the middle of nowhere. Mountainhomes were to the south-west, goblin dark fortress to the north-east and elven forests to the west. There was a mountain nearby, where we could find safety. We heard a scream and a stomp. The forest titan was coming! We decided to climb up the mountain and dig a shelter there.

Fourth dream - nightmare

It was friday the thirteenth. I was in my home. It was changed to an old, wooden hut. There were blood stains on the wall. I was moving slowly through the darkness. From the hallways I headed for the bathroom. When I entered the bathroom, I heard Jason Voorhes coming. I moved through the mirror to the mirror world. The house was even more horrifying there. I went out of bathroom, only to get ambushed by Jason. I dropped to the ground.

Wow. I've really let myself slide here... I won't post every single dream from January, but I will post the more meaningful/impressive ones. I've been trying Calea Z recently, so I'll mark the ones I had with CZ.

January 01, 2015

---

Poor Donna

There was a really surreal moment in one of my dreams this night. I had been with Zukin, planning to go up north. We were driving, and then I sort of blacked out, and then I am in the water, doing a backflip through an innertube, or something. It was all slow motion and when I surfaced, I am in a lake. I swim up to the shore, where Zukin is waiting for me. We were apparently part-way to the property. We had stopped for a break, and now had to get back on the road again. There was a random young man at the beach who told us where we were out of the blue (we knew, and hadn't asked him), and wished us well on our way out. Flash Forward five years, and this man is dating Donna Noble, but was about to break up with her.

January 05, 2015 (With CZ)

---

Utter Forgiveness

I was in the woods, running from some kind of wild animal. It caught up to me and was going to attack me, so I tried to strangle it... But then it turned into a human woman (who was now unconscious) and we were suddenly in my Oma's house. I was suddenly very worried. There were others with me now, and I feared (I was almost frenzied) that they would hate me and cast me out if they found out what I'd done.

When someone came into the room and saw the woman, they calmly came to her and picked her up, carried her to the couch and set her down, and began caring for her. They didn't show any signs of being mad at me, and said no words of loathing, scolding, etc. They just understood. It was suddenly very calm and peaceful.



Monsters and Climbing Naked

I was in some sort of apartment building in what I think was my hometown. I was with a group of refugees, and we were watching for signs of the giants that were after us. They were a bit like Titans. We began making plans for how we would be able to get to a checkpoint of some kind, and then enacted the plan. After checking for an all clear, I watched the team zigzag across the lawn of the apartment building. The route was completely counter intuitive and it would have made MUCH more sense to just shoot right for the spot they ended up in... But oh well.

I ran to where they were now, and we ran down the road for a distance. I ducked down an alley, which ended with a blank wall save for a door. I opened the door to find it was a door on the side of a 6th-or-so-floor of a building. And I realized I had nothing but a towel on now. There were stairs leading to the ground, and I had to go down them. I knew I had to, but I didn't know why. I started climbing down the ladder in my towel, and at some point I had to swap hand-holds completely, and it terrified me so much.

January 6, 2015 (With CZ)

---

Forbidden(?) Love

I was at a fancy party, but had gotten there with a friend very early. There was no body in the round ballroom yet, so I went to the bathroom, which was for some reason crowded. I was in a huge black dress, and there was a rack for women's skirt cinches. Like, you took it off, put it on the rack, went to piss, and then got it back. I remember the bathroom being a bit steampunk (this whole dream was, really) and claustrophobic. When I got out of the bathroom, the ballroom was packed, and I could no longer find my friend. We were part of a secret rebel group, actually. We were here on a mission. The mission didn't require me to be with my friend, so I wandered about and mingled with the gentry, trying to get information from them. Then, I met a young man in a dashing steampunk-ish suit that looked like it was made to be with my dress. He was a soldier, or a security agent for the government, so we were supposed to be enemies, but I found myself so attracted to him. It was like electricity (yay, Clichés!) He almost literally swept me off my feet on the dance floor, and I was so worried about whether my friend/co-rebel was watching, for fear of being punished by the higherups... But at the end it turned out this man was also a rebel under cover. So it was alright that I had wild sex with him that night :D



Forgot my Shoes...?
For some reason this was a really striking dream. I went to a movie with my little brother and his friends, but realized as I got out of the car that I'd left the house without my shoes, or my wallet, and so he had to pay for me. After the movie, I got back home by walking through parts of the hospital in town. Like, I crossed town inside the hospital. It was like using the Nether to travel longer distances in the Overworld... The hospital is the Nether...

January 07, 2015 (With CZ)

---

Home for the Holidays

I was working at some large, private Christian school (which, for the record, is SO not where I would want to teach) and it was the last day before the winter break. There were four or five classes that were normally held right in this huge hallway in the middle of the school, but my class was in a room down one of the side wings. I was walking out of the building and saw some old students and their Christmas projects at their tables in the hallways, and waved at them. I exited the building through the freight entrance thing, where someone was dragging a huge Christmas tree into the building... I wished them all a merry Christmas, and then saw my current mentor teacher in the parking lot. She wished me a merry Christmas, gave me a big hug, and then for some reason offered to wash my windshield for me. It smudged.

I picked up my little brother, brought him to my place, and then our parents came and picked us both us. While in the car, my mom was telling a story of something I had done as a child. Apparently I had gone up to a boy in my class and told him we were going to pair up and do lots of shit together. I had used a specific phrase often, but I can't remember now what that was. During the story, I was showing my [b]MoonMoon[b] in the car; my head was like on the car seat and my feet were hanging over my face? We pulled up to the house I grew up in and my brother and I were fascinated by the renovations my parents had made; the retaining wall to the right of the driveway was now made of lots of petrified logs with the rings facing outwards. They were rainbow as fuck and shiny. The driveway itself was also different. It was now a sort of red brick cobblestone type pavement. There was an ultra hard and transparent bordering on translucent coat over it all so that it would not wear away ever. But there weren't enough bricks apparently, and so there was a huge gap in the driveway where they had dug out the space of the bricks but hadn't had enough. It was like a small trench, and the car had a rough time going over it. I got out of the car and inspected the bricks, really liking the way they sort of shimmered. My neighbor came out, and complimented me on my shirt (I don't remember which one I was wearing).

January 08, 2015 (With CZ)

---

Rich and Weird as FUCK

I was a member of a very rich but EXTREMELY eccentric family. We had lots of cuddle sessions with some large animal (I think they were Alpacas) and at some point I was flunking a class because I had a secret poor boyfriend, and so my parents docked one cuddle session per day for a whole month, and I was so sad. But I was really falling in love with who ever this low-class boy was, so I was okay with it all. We thought we had to keep it secret from my family because they would want me to date a rich man's son, but when they ended up finding out, the family was actually very okay with it. They even gave me back that cuddle session when they figured out I was only failing that class because of love.

My family invited him to come on our HUGE yacht (it was more like a personal cruise-ship) to play with the whales. We went to visit the whales at least once a week and they knew us well. they would do tricks and shit when ever they saw us coming. But this time they were all skittish and ended up swimming away from the yacht. We were confused but then a HUGE whale loomed out of the water and floated above the yacht. It had a shit ton of packed snow on its back somehow, and started slowly tilting sideways. I saw the snow start to fall onto the yacht, and panicked because it was enough to seriously harm us. I got knocked over the edge somehow but had hold of the railing, and managed to miss all the snow because of that. I apparently took a snap-video of the whole thing and sent it to my whole contacts list.

I ended up having to go to the bathroom at some point but accidentally went into the men's restroom. And I found out I was pregnant I think. That, or I was on my period and didn't have any supplies... Either way, I was REALLY embarrassed when I found out I was in the men's room. :D

January 13, 2015 (With CZ)

---

Fuzzy Cars

I had driven to a clinic for my dad, who was there. I went inside but got scared of something, so I waited outside, where I noticed that there were lots of cars that were fuzzy and blue with brown hoods. Like, almost every other car was like that. It was weird. As if they were living things... A nurse came out of the clinic and offered me some candy to make me feel better since she'd seen me being uncomfortable before.


Sleepover

I was at home, and was having a sleepover in the hot-tub room so we could see a special comet that night. We saw the comet, and then also a double shooting star that arched all the way to the horizon, and stayed lit up for a few whole minutes. It was kinda beautiful!

All that SEAWEED

I was on a trip to Austria with my cohort. Apparently I had driven my car across the ocean, because when I got to the checkpoint, there was a bunch of seaweed all over my car and up in the rims. I remember driving through vivid, beautiful mountains, too.

New City?!

I was in Pokemon Omega Ruby, and was diving next to a cliff or something, and discovered a tunnel I had never seen before. I followed it and surfaced in a new city. I was ready to explore EVERYTHING like I always do in those games, and started talking to people. I ended up signing up for some sort of drawing, but knocked something over on top of someone right away and got disqualified, I think. I went into a store at the other end of this large town square, and talked to some cat-boy thing that had a piece of paper. He kept saying it said something, but every time I looked at it, it said something different. After three different paper messages, I got lucid for a very short time, and wandered around the town a bit. It was low-level lucidity and another of those ones where I just didn't feel the need to try to control anything and just watched what happened.

January 14, 2015 (With CZ)

---

August Meals

I was on my way back home from a trip with my little brother, and two of my big brother's best friends, and one of my students who has Autism and his TA. (An odd mix of people)

We stopped at a McDonald's near home because my student. who was in my car in the passenger's seat, was saying he needed a break. He and his TA nearly opened the door before I stopped the car and got out to walk around and screamed a little. I went to the counter (it was like a food truck, but it was a real Micky D's... kinda weird) to order a double cheeseburger meal. I called it by the number, but the lady at the counter was a little confused, and then said, "Ooooh, you mean the August Meal?" I was confused, and she showed me the menu above the counter. Apparently they had started calling their meals by months instead of numbers. What I wanted was now the August Meal. I got a huge rubber car insert that would hold a burger as well as a rubber car drink holder, for free? It was some promotion they were having.

January 17, 2015

---

Zuke's Acting Weird

I was at Zukin's place but she was talking to some other guy, ignoring me completely. I was a little upset by this, so I left and went down the road to a different co-op. There was some sort of small-scale party going on, so at first I was held up at the door, but then they let me in and took me upstairs. Zukin is there, in a room that was right above the porch I'd had to wait on. The floor was a really interesting pattern of black metal supports with sturdy glass bricks in them. So you could see down to the porch. It was pretty cool! I find out Zukin is also HERE, with the same guy. She is still talking to him, and it's looking like he is being way too flirty. Knowing that Zukin had her eyes on someone else, I tried to sit with them and deflect this guy's attention away from Zukin. I sat in a triangle with the two of them, so not in between them but not letting them in their own world, either. They started to cuddle, and Zukin was like, "It's all good Kestrel, we're just sharing warms." I said, "I can share warms, too..." But she ignored me and he like crawled over her and started kissing her neck. I sort of glared at Zukin, and she looked at me with this look that said "get lost."

I was so dejected by this that I just sort of wandered away wanting to cry. I looked around the room and had a strange feeling about the room... it seemed like something I had seen before, maybe in a dream... I had the inkling of something being off, especially with how Zukin had acted. She would never do that to me. I continued along the edge of the room and came to the entry to a stairwell with lots of stuff stored in it, and I tried to move stuff so I could go down these stairs... And realized I was completely naked. I tried to remember where my clothes had gone, because I had JUST been wearing them, and that feeling of things being off grew. I panicked, and rand own a different set of stairs to the bathroom. I was facing the door, wondering how I was going to get some clothes, when it hit me that I must be dreaming, which is why everything felt so strange. I looked at my hands and they were all nubby and gross looking.

I left the bathroom not really caring about what I was or wasn't wearing, and left the building and this weird anti-Zukin, to go flying. I had remembered the "go backwards" task just after taking a step forward, which was a little disappointing, but I jumped to fly in search of a crystal ball, instead. It took a few attempts to fly, which is weird because usually I can just do it easily. As soon as I was in the air, something shifted and cracked and the dream ended. I was back in my bed at home. This was either as False Awakening or I actually had woken up. I didn't RC so I don't know.



How Does It FEEL?

I was on a bus in some city with a river running through it. The bus was under a bridge hen there was a siren. It was an air-raid test, apparently, and people started getting off the bus, even though the bus driver was telling them not to, because it as safer in here. About 6 people, including me, stayed on the bus, and the bus driver started driving us around the city more, not letting us off. He said the idea was to look natural, but that we shouldn't be outside at all. Inside the bus was slightly safer, especially if it looked like it was on its normal rounds.

We got to the ocean shore, where there were some docks. He let us off here, saying we should be safe at this point. I looked up and noticed that the clouds were ALL animals. Like, giant sea turtles and eagles flying through the air, or giraffes or lions roaring. Some clouds were pretty patterns when I looked more carefully. I was now only with the bus driver and a kid, who looked a lot like one of my students but didn't quite feel like him. Then shit went down. Three drones of some sort were flying in formation above us, from my left to the right. Then another zoomed past, but stopped, and turned back to us. The bus driver told us to run for the buildings, which we did. The kid and I ran to the nearest building, which happened to be a public restroom. The women's one was locked though, and the men's one had lots of weird stuff stored in it, like a large plastic horse head... We kept going, trying to find places to get indoors while the drones were hovering above people, threatening them.

Things seemed to be over shortly after the kid and I found shelter, and then we walked on a bridge over the river that went through the city. I told him that if we walked down a path by the water, we would get back to where the bus had been when all this had started.

Somehow I ended up at home. For some reason I was laying down on the driveway, perhaps just glad that the "test" air raid was done. My eyes were closed, and when I opened them, there was one of the drones right above me. Like it was hovering less than a foot above my body, covering me completely. It tilted so that the end of it was touching my inner thigh, and it as saying things like "how does it feel to be violated? you space is penetrated, how does that feel, eh?" I was so scared but thankfully I woke up.

I guess most people have had a Grim Reaper dream at some point in their life, here’s mine (my scariest LD ever):

In this dream I was at my log cabin doing chores (as usual). I walked into the living room, which has a high vaulted ceiling, and I could see somebody in a dark hood robe, up-side-down, with their face against the wall, and about half way up. I found this very alarming, and I instantly became lucid. The clarity was perfect and everything was vivid. The dream figure then crawled head first quickly down the wall, across the floor, and then it stood up one foot in front of my face. He was slightly taller than I, and it was the Grim Reaper! I was totally freaked out! He had icy, bluish gray eyes, which seemed to be glowing, and a lizard face. His scales and coloring were actually quite brilliant and beautiful as far as a lizard goes (I thought). The first thing that came to mind was, “Kill him!” This wasn’t a normal response for me in any form, especially while lucid.

I reached forward and tore his black, hooded robe off and threw it to the floor. This genderless, lizard biped was standing there completely naked with a shocked look of fear on his face! His mouth dropped open and his eyes bulged wide. He looked totally weak and anorexic. I thought to myself, I’m going to destroy you. In complete rage, I reached forward to crush him, but he shot off in faint wisp of smoke right through the log wall and was gone. He was unbelievably fast. I immediately woke up, and I was shaken by the dream. This was no doubt the scariest lucid dream I’ve ever had. I saw this dream figure once again in an LD last year, but I left him alone and ignored him, and he kept his distance.

First dream

It was friday the thirteenth. I went out of my house in the midnight. It was cold, dark night. The sky was clear, although I couldn't spot any stars. I was going to the garage, to check something in the car. Suddenly I heard Jason Voorhees, and I spotted something in the darkness, moving towards me. Frightened I ran towards the door of my house, and closed myself inside. Then I felt safe, and Jason wasn't trying to attack me again.

Second dream

I was driving from the city by car. It was midnight. Sky was clear. It looked like endless, black void. I could hardly see anything on the road. Suddenly I saw light in the distance. I thought it was someone with flashlight, but there was no one. Just light moving on the road. When I was getting close to it, I heard terrifying scream. I tried to raise the speed, but then I ran into a skid, and hit the tree.

Details to follow later.

One of the most unpleasant situations in my life has resulted in one of my most memorable dreams (albeit nightmare basically):

+ (epic) struggle against me and my wife at work: theft of our precious silver, confrontation, race to the police, return to work, locked in, weird visuals of the process of manipulation of clay into various faces, drive through suburban cityscape with hills of golden maple and pink cherry trees, view of massive mall/movie theater complex to the right

I'm in a workplace with my wife, there are long hallways and clusters of desks spread around. ("We" means wife and I were basically together the entire dream). We go to a different group in a cluster of desks/cubes, they're hostile to us. Their manager is also hostile to us. A guy there doesn't like me wife because he thinks that she is always giving them tasks to do with out any effort spent herself.

I see down a long hallway that this guy is standing at the cabinet that houses our precious silver tableware. The top drawer of the cabinet is open, and this guy has a plastic bag spread out on top and is unloading the tableware into the bag. I run up to him and yell at him and shove him away angrily. I speak to my wife that we need to lock the cabinet in the hallway, I imagine a key inserted into a lock and turning, engaging a lock. I return to the cabinet and open the top drawer, and it is empty, we've been robbed!

We're again with the hostile group, sitting down leaning against the desks, and I get a vibe that the guy is going to attack us, he stands up and starts backing away, I think he's trying to get proper distance to launch some attack, so I quickly run up to him and close the distance, he keeps backing away and I keep coming up right next to him. I look down and see that he has a revolver tucked into the front of his jeans, I immediately grab for it and take it into my left hand, start to walk away and call for my wife to join me urgently, we must get out of here and call the police. The pistol is small, but deadly, he could have shot us. I right away open the cylinder and empty the (somewhat colorful) rounds into my right hand, and place the rounds into my right pocket and the now unloaded revolver into my left pocket.

We're exiting the building in haste, we must call the police, it's important to get our story registered first, the hostiles will try to get their story first. Should we go to the PA police department or the CU police department? The PA does not deal with cases outside of their jurisdiction I think / my wife says, OK, let's go to the CU then.

Outside in a parking lot looking for our car, the spot is empty, "They've stolen our car!" my wife exclaims. No, we "remember" quickly that we simply moved our car ourselves far away, we'll have to go and get it.

Driving now through rolling suburban hills with businesses around. To the left I notice a striking hillside covered with shining golden maple trees. I look closer and the trees seem to be pink Japanese cherry trees. I look to the right and down a steep hill I see a massive mall complex below, it's also a giant movie theater, and as we drive past I think what sorts of movies play there, I see some large (actors?) faces on a marque, maybe I should go to this mall to check it out.

Back in the work place, it's empty, I think they could come and lock us in.

Talking with some guy at work, his job over the years has been to create a system for transforming lumps of clay into faces. I see a lump of clay up close, there is a narration about the different parts of it, and soon it is getting pushed and pulled and formed into a series of about 5-6 different heads/faces with open mouths, mostly sort of monster looking. I'm thinking this has taken a long time and seems sort of like a wasted effort.

(Waking from this dream was a relief, the sense of dread and forboding was constant throughout the whole thing. I quickly realized though that as a dream it was fairly awesome in terms of "present" experience, continuity, length/coherence, and visuals.)

+ pushing through crowds crossing the street to get to the buses

A crowd of people is standing at a crosswalk waiting for the signal to light, some are "beeping" behind us telling us to go. We wait for the signal, and cross the street, and we're in a sort of bus station. Buses and coming and going, our bus is full and leaving, there are so many buses around that we can probably catch another one.

Move into a group of (woman?) talking/laughing about something?

+ (semi/almost lucid) getting sexually daring with a woman and in front of a mirror

I'm in a bedroom, I'm following around a black woman, not terribly attractive but I'm still following her around. We're standing in front of a mirror her attention is not on me, but I get an idea and want to start exposing myself so that I can see myself and the woman in the mirror but so that she doesn't see me. I'm doing this on and off stopping when she looks? Then I take her aside to the bed and pull out my (ahem) to show her, and the dream ends….

My parents have just bought a house up on a high hill overlooking the ocean. There is a whole community of similar houses up on that hill; ours is the last one at the end of the street, on the ocean-facing side of the hill. Beyond our house, the hill becomes more of a cliff, and the ocean is below it. My family has just recently moved to the community.

My parents, my sister, and I are coming back from being out and about, and we see all our neighbors standing or sitting around in the open area at the highest point on the hill, which we have to pass through to get to our house. When we talk to them, we learn that they are out there watching the neighborhood slowly fall apart. I see an open patch of mud on the ground in a corner where two pieces of concrete come together, with air bubbles coming up through it. I see a corner of someone's concrete patio sticking up at an odd angle, no longer flush with the ground. All over the hilltop, the is starting to liquefy like this.

We get to our house (which is a long, straight, single-story house built perpendicular to the cliff), go inside, and see that the floor is now tilting at a 20-degree angle or more. It's clear that it's ultimately going to slide off the top of the cliff and fall into the ocean, but we can't feel it moving right now. Our mom tells us to collect any of our things that we want to save before that happens.

My sister and I go to the far end of the living room, which is the narrow edge of the house and the wall furthest from the edge of the cliff. There is a fireplace there, with lots of dark wooden shelves built into the walls on either side of it. We start taking the things we want to save off the shelves. Two of the first things I grab are shiny, silver-colored, stainless-steel thimbles. My sister also grabs a similar thimble of her own. I look closely at both of the thimbles I have and see that they each have a small number 10 etched into them. Good - they're both mine, and my sister hasn't accidentally touched one of mine.

The shelves are mostly filled with CDs and DVDs in cases, but there are lots of other things there, too. We grab a few other small items, but the number of things we decide to save is tiny compared to the total number of things on the shelves. It doesn't take long until we look at what's left on the shelves and think, "There really isn't anything else here that's particularly important to me."

----------------------------------------

Side notes:
When I realized what I'd seen and done in this dream, I laughed out loud. Those thimbles are what I've been using as a dream totem for more than four years now. They're supposed to be a reality-check tool. I saw it and handled it, and it never once occurred to me that I might be dreaming, nor that I should use it to see if I might be dreaming. How silly of me!

I haven't had a nightmare in a loooooong time.
I watched Silent Hill for the first time yesterday...

I was watching a movie with my parents and some other people. The movie was so horrifying that I had to close my eyes at parts. For example, in one part, there was a mother who lost her child and screams of terror came out of her. There was blood running down a path, the blood from her daughter, and it turned into dark ashes. At another point in the movie, it was like a war scene from Lord of the Rings. After the movie, some people laid down on the ground and the director of the movie asked who wanted their legs sawed off. It was apparently just for show and not real. A guy volunteered. He was overweight, had brown curly hair, and wore dark clothes. The director got a saw and started sawing through his leg. It looked pretty real to me. We were forced to watch this movie twice, and the second time, it became real...

I was with Niki and was popping popcorn. A black guy and some other guys came up to us. The black guy asked me if I wanted to "hang out" with him and of course I was hesitant so I said no, but for some reason eventually agreed. We started walking away and then he told me what we had to do. We had to sneak up on these guys and kill them before they would kill us. We were in a huge clothing warehouse and the guys were sitting on a window ledge. They saw us and came towards us. There was lots of fighting. At one point Lindsey Stirling and I were throwing darts at each other(lol).

Then sirens went off...

Everybody ran away. It was me and a group of people left, consisting of the black guy, one girl, and a bunch of other guys. We didn't have time to run back, so instead we ran forward. It was like a game and we had to get to the end. We ran towards a window that was facing a brick wall. It was night time so we couldn't see much except the reflection of us. The "creatures" were coming. I was so scared I closed my eyes. The black guy said, "don't close your eyes, look at my finger," for if I closed my eyes they could get me. He told me to look away and stand still and that way they won't see you. The "creatures" came up behind us, but they appeared as a copy of us. The girl turned around to see them. Big mistake. When she did that, even more appeared. She tried stabbing one of them but it was no use. They were surrounding us. They were about to attack...

I woke up and it was 6 am. I was too frightened to go back to sleep because I didn't want to go back to the dream. Everytime I closed my eyes I would see dead bodies and blood and scary creatures. So I wrote in my DJ and left the light on and finally went back to sleep.

(I went to sleep in a car on the way out of state.)
I dreamt woke up in my bed at night, the room was exceedingly bright even though in my heart I knew it was night time. I did the hand RC and my fingers were growing in weird angles.

************************************************** ****Que: Lucidity****************************************** **********************
I took a moment to observe how I think while dreaming and found it shockingly similar to waking life, I had lucids before but none had ever come to this level of clarity. I live in the basement so it came as a shock when I opened my door and came out on the front lawn. I walked through a town that looked nothing like mine and explored the world around me(especially touching the concrete walls and looking at how much detail they had). I walked to my high school and found out that it is in the same relative location as waking life which was weird since i did not recognize anything else. Standing at the corner to drive into the student parking lot was my dream guide Morpheus(Aren't I lucky?). He ushered me into the school and said that he could not follow. I explored the school and to my surprise I had my school laptop by my side without ever remembering to bring it. Then a tall fat kid came and tried to bully me by stealing it. I felt the emotional response of rage even knowing that this was a dream, and so I grabbed him, and ate his soul dementor style(sans kiss thankfully there was SOME distance). I explored some more and found an abandoned janitors closet, at this point shit went down and all the lights in the school dimmed to a dark red and blood painted the walls. Instantly I thought of the demo to silent hill P.T and my subconscious (bless/curse its soul) decided to go with my expectations and made a baby cry in the closet(I could only see through a crack in the doorway. I then heard my dreamguide's voice saying "I know the only me is me, are you sure the only you is you?" I thought wryly to myself My subconscious and I are the same and different, and the only you is NOT you since you are a part of me. I turned around to fast to walk in the other direction and found myself in an accidental scene change. Now my friend Jacob sat in a dark office with me but he was different. He had sharklike teeth and pure black eyes. I rolled mine and said "Now what the fuck are YOU supposed to represent." "I am everything you hate about yourself." he replied darkly. That confused me as there was nothing similar between me and my friend from school but I had just got off the phone with him when I dozed off so maybe that was it. I was like "Hah no I don't have the time to deal with nightmares, you do realize this is MY dream right? I can obliterate you with just a thought." He grinned challengingly at me and I found my powers not working. I laughed at the audacity of my subconscious and overpowered it through aggressive control if passive would not do it. I went into tiger stance like Udyr from league of legends laid the smack down hard. After I was finished pummeling him I went out of the school and walked on the road out of town, thinking about philosophical questions, deep meanings, and the nature of my reality that was around me. Eventually I woke up and opened my laptop to write this down.

I am in a dark house with old dusty furniture. I am in the living room I think and I fall into a hole in the floor to the basement. It is dark beyond where the light from the level above comes through the hole but I can see rows of pillars or something. At the back there is something moving. I can hear it and barely see, but it is definately not human. It suddenly produces a small light source like a tiny pen light or something. I can see the light searching the walls and floors like it is looking for something. I get very scared and climb a thin water pipe back up into the living room. I am terrified of being found by anyone, especially by that thing in the basement.

I was at the pool at my family's old health club. I noticed that I didn't need to hold my breath to stay underwater and it felt very relaxing just floating there underwater. Also, the pool was much deeper than it is IWL. Eventually the lifeguard thought that I was drowning and pulled me out of the water. I apologized for calling him into action and told him that I was totally fine.


I had a dream that involved my mom wanting me to drive the family's old van. I didn't want to do it.


I was in a Cafe in the outlet mall a couple miles from my house. (I don't know if it is there IWL, but I could 'sense' where I was. I ran into my friend sitting at a large table all by himself. We already have a C and an H so we'll call him CH. So I sat down with him. I remember thinking that I might want to go get some tea or something from the Cafe. But I haven't seen CH in years so we wanted to get our hellos out of the way.

I went to the Cafe and bought some tea. A little expensive, but nothing too out of the ordinary.

When I sat back down CH was looking through my art portfolio. There were a bunch of large drawings in it that are not there IWL. The looked like drawings that I did as a child. One was particularly good though. I remembered that I wanted to show him something on the back. When I turned it back over onto the front the particularly good drawing was gone.

I began cascading into lucidity as I noticed that turning the drawings over, or looking away from them produced different results each time. I transitioned from the Cafe to my living room. I still had one of the drawings in my hand. I then did a nose pinch just to confirm that I was dreaming. Oh, yeah.

My parents were sitting on the couch across from me. My dad had his arm over my mom's shoulder. I told them that I was lucid dreaming and had to go do my goals. They smiled, almost creepily and said OK.

I walked around the kitchen of my house, rubbing my hands on things and stabilizing. At one point, I pulled out a drawer. It was full of CD cases in neat rows. But the drawer was broken, one of the sides was missing. I thought to myself that I could fix it. I looked away, and the side was fixed. I closed it.

I went to the door to go outside, but all I could see outside the windows was black. I couldn't even see that the front porch was there. I closed my eyes and tried to have it appear as day when I opened them. Nope, still dark outside. I then tried to transport myself directly onto a beach. (Why a beach? Because that was where many of my early lucid dreams took place. It just seemed like a good place to go.)

I closed my eyes and visualized a beach. It seemed to be working, but when I came out of it, I was still in my house. I tried again. This time, when I visualized the beach, Manei was there. But when I came out of it, I was still in my house.

I then thought that my bedroom might be a better place to change the scene. I have a huge potted tree that could be perfect for bringing me to a tropical/beach environment. I made my way up the steps. But when I got to the top, and turned down the hall to go into my room, I felt a presence. I looked behind me to see someone emerge from the wall.

The means by which they emerged from the wall was pretty psychedelic and difficult to describe in words. It could best be described as pushing into a taught blanket from the other side until it peeled away from the wall and he became a figure cloaked in that yucky beige color my parents painted the walls. As I saw the figure coming down on me, I wasn't so much scared as I was 'are you serious?!'. I found myself more annoyed by this being than anything else because I had lucid goals to attend to.

He wrapped me up in mummy wrapping scarves, and then picked me up feet first. Originally, I thought I could simply overpower the being. That didn't work, it's movements and grip felt as strong as steel. I managed to get a hand free. I looked down and saw the barefoot leg of a man. I put my hand up to it and tried to picture a steel spike forming out of my hand and going through the leg. Nothing happened.

The being carried me into the guest bedroom and wrestled me onto the bed. By this point, I had both hands free.

"Stop! You are a nightmare! What do you represent?!"

No response.

"This is my dream! I'm not scared of you, whoever you are!" I said, venting my annoyance. It was at this point that I realized that this being was no monster, but merely a man. I started trying to punch him, but my hits didn't connect with any meaningful force. It felt as though I was simply punching a pillow. I, instead tried to peel away the cloak and mummy scarves, that felt as though they were made out of paper.

I managed to peel away the scarves around his face. I saw the face of a late 30's-early 40's man with short hair and a stubble-ish mustache. He looked a little like my father, if he was more of a military type. I couldn't help but thing that this man was an agent or a part of some task force.

I he still seemed intent on restraining me. I then had one more idea. I put my right hand behind my back and manifested a dreamcatcher. I broke free of his grip completely and floated to the end of the bed. I held up the dreamcatcher. It was no bigger than my hand, but I could see the feathers hanging down from the bottom.

"Nightmare Ward!"

Now before anyone asks, I don't know where those words came from. I guess it was just the first thing that I thought to say.

The man went from being determined and aggressive to terrified faster than anyone I've seen. He started to scream in defeat and the dream went dark.

Officially, that's the third nightmare that I've vanquished.

I false awoke on my bed. I figured that I should get out of bed and write down the dream. I made it to the door of my room when I false awoke a second time.

I was laying in bed, suspicious of my reality. Eventually, I started moving to preform a nose pinch. Yep, still dreaming. I sat up in bed. I then woke up a third time.

I was awake for real this time, but I felt that I could DEILD if I tried. I figured that I wanted to get up and write my lucid while I still had it.

01.01.2015

Dark Storms (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I remember being at my school. It was dark outside, and I was standing in the lobby. Only a couple lamps illuminated the lobby and elementary hall to my left. Suddenly, I felt aware.. Wasn't I just asleep in my bed? I did the nose plug RC. Sure enough, I could breathe through my nose!

I proceeded to run down the hall to my left, and for some reason, that caused me to teleport.

I wound up in my mom's house. It was still nighttime. (I had lost some lucidity here) Some of my classmates (mainly boys) were in my living room with me. We were sitting on two couches. I was in between two of them, Mike on my right and I think it was WL on my left. I think we were watching a movie on a very dim TV screen in front of us. Here, I just kind of let the dream go (I didn't have that much control).

Mike was talking to me and suddenly he placed his hand on my right leg. He smiled at me kind of oddly. I noticed he didn't have the best intentions, so surprisingly, I was aware enough (I'm really surprised I did this) to move his hand off of my leg. He then began nudging me with his shoulder, playfully.

We ended up "falling asleep". (There was a period of time where it was darkness for a couple seconds) We all woke up at the same time, still in the same place on the couch. "Did we fall asleep?" I heard myself say sheepishly. "I guess so." Mike said.

The living room was dark. I heard something outside. I turned around and looked towards the front door. I could see through the windows on the door (not blurry and distorted like they are in real life). I saw what looked like a police car pulling out of the next-door-neighors-who lived-across-from-us's front yard. "Is that the police?" I asked out loud. I got up from the couch and walked towards the front door and opened it. I saw that it was raining, much like a monsoon. The guys followed me to the door. Across the road, I saw the police car, and a badly wrecked car beside it in the yard.

"Oooh." said someone.

Suddenly, they disappeared. Having little control and awareness, I assumed that they went to go look at the wreckage. I closed the front door. I found my glasses on me somewhere (probably in my pocket). As I was handling them, I noticed they were broken. The frames had snapped in two. "Maybe I could use some sort of magic to repair these", I thought.

I never tried. I walked to the back door, and looked out onto the back porch. It was dark of course. I could see my great dane staring at me through the window. He looked oddly deformed. I opened the door to get a better look.

Instead of a normally shaped dog; his body looked like a balloon. His head was normal sized, and his legs were very thin and long. His tail was nonexistant.

When he walked around, it was creepy.

Creeped out, I went back inside and closed the door.

Suddenly, I heard a loud clap of thunder. It sounded more like glass breaking, but then a very bright flash of light illuminated my vision. The house was as dark as ever. A very loud clap of thunder again. A flash of light. A bit scared, I opened the front door again. It was barely raining now. Pieces of the wrecked car were still there.

I then woke up naturally.

Vividity: 7.5
Awareness: 8
Dream Length: 4-5 mins.