All DJ Entries

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

I'm in a school and there is a man guiding me. He walks through a door and when I try to enter it it's too small for me. I scream out how he came in. He says he walked through the other door to the right. I go to that door and am able to go through. This school seems to be for people with psychological and physical problems. We keep on walking and reach the cellar. I express my concerns with going to the cellar but he keeps on going. There is a room with a bed so I walk to it. 4 men about 18-20 years old come and jump me from the upper bed. They all seem to have some kind of menta/physical disorders. They try to grab me by my privates and I am panicking and punching one of them especially. I manage to escape and scream to them that this is insane, especially to my guide.

I'm in church and there are some activities. I see Emanuel from church and we talk and I don't like him. There is some kind of girl there too.

I'm in the TV room upstairs and fly out the window. I fly to Hemköp and I am half lucid. The dream fades. This dream repeats about three times I think.

I'm in my bed, thinking about why this is not a dream. I think about how real my breathing feels. I pinch my nose and try to breathe in. I't works so I walk up from bed and walk into the TV room next doors. Usually I jump out and fly away from the window in my room but I decide to change it up today. I start to meditate and try to stabilize the dream. I think about what I want to do. I fly out and it's really dark outside. I try to make it sunny but the dream won't let me. There is a really fast dog that is running in the night on the road. I decide to race with it and I am really fast and succeeds in some seconds.

I'm in my house and try to figure how I came to the place I were. I can't remember and decide that this is a dream. The dream is really dark and the view is 30° turned to the left. I stabilize the dream and it works. I fly out the same window as the last dream and suddenly I don't have a shirt on me. I fly around the city without any intentions in mind.

I'm in the woods and there are some people fighting injustice. I join them and want to use my new bending technique that I have thought about. I had a dream for some weeks ago where a man told me that I need to master three different bending techniques for each element before I can fully use bending in all of my dreams. The man told me that I should start with earth bending. There are some bad guys in fron of us and my friends beat most of them. There is a man standing on a rock. I stomp my foot in front of the rock and it starts to shake and the man standing on it is loosing balance. I stomp again and the rock flies up in the air about 1,5 meters up. I try to hit the rock with my hand and the rock flies about 2,5 meters away pretty slowly. I try to do it again but I'm having difficulties.

Notes: I had a conversation about how hard it is to have disabled persons in the family and that it can be very energy demanding. I think the first dream was about that. I talked with my dad about Emanuel's family yesterday and that's why I dreamt about him. I remember that I inspected the reality of one of the dreams but can't remember which one. I remembered to meditate this night because I have been focused to do that since many of my lucids have been pretty short lately. When I lied in bed last night I thought about meditation/dream stabilization and earth bending. I slept with the mantra "This is a dream" in Swedish.

Reviewing life moments after death
I am in complete darkness, and the only thing that I can still sense are my memories. There is a sort of sad music, but it has a happy and ethereal to it, like I was done now and no longer had to worry about anything, but now it is all over in exchange. It was some sort of synth instrument maybe, but there was definitely piano. I relive the memory of when I was 4 and apparently a cousin and his mother were coming up to visit us. I came to see them. Then, probably a few years later, apparently the house of them were now right next to ours, only about 8 meters needed to walk to the other's house entrance. It was night, and the cousin was visiting. At some point later we apparently flooded their house, which was extremely big, with phosgene for some reason and left to my house. At some point I looked to the window and it was pitch black outside. My mother smelled something weird at some point, and I suggested it might be the phosgene, so I closed our windows. Had problems closing the left one, though, and it had a weird design. Back in the black, I kept thinking how I really wished that you could just turn back time. At some point I also thought about my borther.

---

That was deep.. also, that phosgene part was weird.

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

I had an eventful dream. Then my alarm woke me up. The only thing I can remember from the dream is the most recent.

I sit in a car and the man in front of me says something about being good that rhymes in Swedish.

When I woke up I knew it was an eventful dream and it felt as if I had lost a big part of me when I tried to remember something I knew I dreamt of just some moments ago.

Again, only unintentional WBTB and intention to lucid dream.

In the following sleep cycle I first got into a non-lucid dream but with ever-increasing awareness. When I reached lucidity I seemingly woke up but immediately recognized the false awakening. Getting up and moving was a little difficult, though also incredibly realistic. I was at my parents' house and slowly walked through the dark deserted rooms. At the front door I used the key to open the door though I'd normally just walk through it - the dream was so vivid and yet unstable that I wasn't sure about passing though objects.
Outside it was a bright, warm summer day. The trees on the left were incredibly coloful with red and purple fruits, swinging in a gentle breeze. The wind also blew my long hair into my face which had - surprisingly - a dark-red color. I decided to go into the garden because I expected it to differ from reality - which it then did of course. It resembled the gardens of a palace with lots of water areas and a fountain in the middle.
I thought it would be interesting to drink from the fountain and tried to make a glass appear - didn't work, but whatever. To get to the fountain, I needed to balance on a swimming log. This again felt so incredibly real that I got lost in thoughts about it - and woke up.

I was still close to dreaming, maybe even in sleep paralysis, and so I just let myself sink back in. Some dreamlets washed over me without letting me enter until one of them opened wider and wider. I got to observe a scene where a black car was chased by the police, driving on a bridge high above the sea. In the car there was a dream character that was me, and a partner. They came to a stop, having trouble with their car. Another police car arrived and barred the way. I was still observing, though maybe influencing the plot, when the 'me' in the car decided to take the only way out - to jump with the car from the bridge.
I saw the car falling down and into the water. Reminding me that this was just a dream, I took my place down there. Now, I was suddenly swimming underwater. Of course I knew that I could still breath and I did - but every breath was difficult as it was accompanied by a sting of fear.
In large circles I was diving deeper and deeper until suddenly all water was gone. Otherwise, the surroundings were still the same - now looking like a vast hall. The floor was cluttered with balls and balloons of different colors and sizes. One of them was special: it was filled with what looked like confetti. My partner who had come there with me was trying to cut it open but the material seemed very firm. Someone else told us that there would be knowledge about the universe and about the future in there (okay?!). I took it and pulled (with some difficulty) the plug. Without the chance to do anything else, I woke up.

This was another good example of the sheer weirdness of dreams and also my first time dreaming lucid in third person perspective, interesting!

So I've probably had a lucid dream everyday since my last journal entry. This almost confirms my hypothesis that technique is not as important as timing. I did some google-sleuthing and there seems to be already research supporting my guess: Source.

Had a lucid dream using some of my common powers of shapeshifting, going invisible and moving through solid objects; in this instance a tall fence.

21st August 2020 (DFLN Thread)

Fragment:

In the van with H driving around. We go through some industrial estate or warehouse district. We see people being gutted as we drive past, but we aren't concerned. We just think it to be in poor taste or something. Some of the characters that are being gutted, I recognise them from earlier on in the dream, feeling no pity for them because they were nasty; but I still feel this looks like an undignified death.

Fragment:

Some version of WoW, but set in a realistic city of some sort, half fantasy, half not? With H, I was taking some area from the Horde and for the Alliance. I remember going on some sort of bombing run and seeing diagrams of the region. I remember the Horde outnumbered us by a great ratio.

Dream:

At the end of a dream I was in some kind of classroom, in a school. There was a teacher and there were several other pupils. The teacher was first giving some theory on something. Some things like hardware and software programming were mentioned. I have some awareness of being kind of lying down on my back, and next to something.

Then we're about to do something. The teacher moves, and I sort of sit up now. I'd been lying next to an old limestone tomb. We're apparently going to open it and examine the dead's objects of burial. Someone moves the lid open and I look at another one of the pupils, a girl. They don't realise it'll wreak and I instantly move my head away and breathe out, fully expecting a foul odour. But as the lid is fully removed, while I do get a whiff of something, it's very faint.

This struck me as odd, but in any case the rest of the pupils started carefully removing items and analysing them. Someone next to me takes a piece of clothing from some bony hands.

The teacher notices that something is off? The dead apparently has some kind of shawl, with a Discord logo on it and she says that it's impossible, since the body had been buried hundreds of years ago. I myself did not notice or see any such logo.

But this leads her to suspect that the body is more recent than previously thought and now when I look inside the tomb, I see a naked white man, with fine white-gold hair, sitting up. He looks pale or lifeless as expected, I seem to recall. The teacher touches the forehead of the body to inspect the temperature and see how "recent" it was.

The dream ended here, the doorbell rang and I had to go answer the door.

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

This dream was 01.30

I'm in a dark worrying environment that is desert like. There is a fort that I'm walking besides. There is a small building to the right of my fort that has a tire on top of it. The wind is making the tire blow away but the wind doesn't bother me. Sivert and Tony are captured and I scream into the desert "Sebastian (my cousin), let them go!". William is also there and he is worried.

I'm by a pool and swimming with some people. I'm interacting with someone swimming there. I'm being tricked by a girl that takes some of my fingers. I'm feeling bad for a boy next to me that lost nine of his fingers to the girl.

I'm watching a movie and there is a professor that is fighting with another professor that has the police with him. The trapped lonely professor got elemental powers and makes the landscape change.Some people fall down cliffs. Therese, my cousins mother, asks me what the movie is about. I'm now by another place with my dad and his siblings and his mother. We are planting beans. I do it all wrong so the beans becomes potatos. The professor guy is there and he claims he can control the animals. There is a nice looking animal that we pet. Suddenly it transforms into a tiger that attacks my friend. I protect my friend and calm the tiger down. The tiger transforms into random animals, some of them doesn't exist. The last animal it transforms into is a blue big dinosaur bird that licks my wounds. I walk away to some dogs. They walk into a place of poor people and me and my friends act as though we are poor too. I lay down in the mud next to a dark man that is poor. He looks down on me and walks inside a poor house he has.

I had some kind of lucid were I was my sister but it was only thoughts.

Edit: Added in 16th August 2020

Dream:

The dream was a bit like Final Fantasy somehow. Had a cinematic-like presentation, long dream overall.

At a mall with H, meeting up with my mom and dad. There are three bad guys around and we help local security deal with them. I remember a rectangular area of the mall, it had four escalators or six, two at each end (four in total) and then another two at the central area?

Then I'm walking outside with H, we're holding our arms together. Some Australian guy appears and makes a remark of some kind? I get annoyed by it and I sort of snark at him but not too much, as he looks well built and I'd rather not get into a fight. He kind of goes quiet.

We go for a wee? At some point the guy apologises, something about being gay being illegal in Australia; I accept his apology and say I understand that he has a different background.

A girl? At a castle/mansion place. I remember the outside walls of some castle tower buildings, we were walking along them earlier. The girl is from an earlier part in the dream. I remember being bare foot and feeling cold tiles but not being bothered enough by it for me to mention it.

---

18th August 2020

Dream:

At the end of the dream, me and H were using some kind of Matrix VR headset. Were we watching or maybe participating in a show of some kind?

Then I remember being with H in my parents' old bedroom. We're both naked and we're sort of just lounging about? At one point, H starts getting aroused and we both get a bit silly, making jokes or something. I remember making a Scorpius impression.

I remember running water. Some kind of device attached to a wall. It was leaky, or poorly sealed. Then I remember something else about MB and I was upset that he was lying to someone again, and then he was pretending he hadn't done anything.

---

20th August 2020

Dream (DFLN Thread):

Part of a very long dream. Something about some dream characters, within some big building. A girl who tries to tackle me I think? I seem to remember the building wasn't finished or something, as I remember seeing a lot of bare concrete and open sections.

I dodge the girl's tackle and she falls from three stories high, and she comes apart into several bloody pieces as she hits the floor, but the "tearing apart" seems to not correspond to the impact that had occurred, as it seems lethargic compared to the actual impact and fall.

Several dream characters and small interactions with them? (Like what... Nicely detailed!)

At some point I was in some very distorted version of my old home but with my current neighbours. At some point me and H are in a version of my old room.

I remember hearing the neighbour scream like we've heard it in some mornings before but we mostly just ignored it this time. I also remember the lady from the old couple had someone over, and she was talking so loudly we could hear her voice clearly through walls.

By the end of the dream I'm looking at the computer. I'm on my browser, on the usual art site. Dream-generated art from other artists and I remember commenting or interacting somehow. Something about an art piece focused on a giant maw and its teeth.

Then I remember being on DV looking at my DJ and seeing that I got my Roman numerals numbering wrong somehow and in more than just a few entries. It makes me wonder in the dream, if I should rename them all and just scrap the idea.

---

Notes:
- Although I don't get them so much anymore I still sometimes have these dreams with MB in them. What surprises me a bit is that in the dreams I don't react violently to his presence. There's usually a context of normalcy, as if contact had never been broken but with the subtext that he'd still done something wrong.
- I don't remember any details of the VR headset thing but it sounds interesting. It's reminding me now of some very ancient dreams I had in my childhood (before I even watched the Matrix, I think?).

- The girl that falls to literal bits, this was probably partly brought on from playing KF, in which the enemies come apart when killed and in, I suppose, quite gruesome ways; though when playing I usually find this to be quite amusing because of the physics effects and sometimes the slow-mo effect makes it all the more amusing.
- The thing about the DJ numerals has occurred to me before as passing thoughts while on DV and away from it too. I have had thoughts about how the system will become cumbersome when it reaches very high numbers.
- The second dream, in the part where I was looking at art; this may have been part of a subconscious process that recently pushed me to trying to do something creative together with another artist. But as with the rest of my dreams on this recurring subject the focus is on interaction, a part I feel deeply deprived of quite often.

- Also worth noting that I was a bit lax with my recall and DJ efforts for about a week, in good part because of schedules and also because of tiredness. I often find it frustrating when I want to make note of dreams while feeling physically incapable of it (fatigue, pain, etc).

Really need to finish catching up on DJ, getting close to current dreams now. I also feel I maybe do need to start giving proper titles to my DJ entries for quicker reminders at a glance of what they're about. I don't like doing it sometimes because I often change my mind about what the focus of the dream was.

11th August 2020

Dream:

Somewhat fragmented. One of the first parts was inside a building, nicely decorated. Public works type of building. Something about me needing a Greek lawyer, without this lawyer some cronies would just be able to punch me as much as they wanted or something? Marble flooring and generally ornate detailing. Don't remember much else.

Then I remember coming out from my old home building's main entrance. I casually walked across the short distance to the entrance of the shop here. The fruit stands weren't where they'd normally be. They were all piled up on top of one another by the entrance, kind of.

There was a basket with green pears. The entrance seemed wider than I remember it? Theo was standing there, watching, so I asked him for some of those pears and he asked how many. Three, I replied for whatever reason.

He put the pears in a clear plastic bag and then I walked closer and he gave them to me. Then I went in the shop and he returned to his usual business. It was surprisingly busy inside. The layout was a slightly altered version of how I remember it, but with a bit of expansion that wouldn't be physically possible. (In which direction?)

I roamed around inside the shop. There was a display counter (where he'd typically have the cheeses, hams, etc.) and I saw some of those heart shaped pastries I like in there. I got two and put them away somehow, in a bag? I remember looking around a bit more but then the next thing I remember is being outside and walking back toward the building's entrance.

Mom came out of the main entrance, I think, and T was arriving from the main entry point into the cul-de-sac. I remember thinking this was all in good timing, as we could then have an afternoon snack together or something.

---

Notes:
- I think I feel this dream is something of a closing chapter on some of my older memories. My family looked as they do now and I felt as I do now. But the shop had already changed after I first left. Theo no longer owns and runs it and that's a part of my childhood that will remain nothing more than a memory now.
- I can't remember why three may have been significant (three can always be significant for whatever reason we want, there were three pears and three of us and so on...) but the dream's choice of fruit in the pear was probably because I had recently had thoughts about having pears, a fruit I haven't had in quite a long time now.

- Though I don't remember the details specifically anymore, I think it was a sunny day.

- I have a rather peculiar thing with timings, for some reason. The encounter of my mom and my sibling just as I'm coming back to the building's entrance is just such a simple example of my peculiar timings but over the last few months I have found myself having a lot of passing thoughts about my timings.

Joining a forum about spirits after a ghostly experience
I am in a dark house, it seems to be my home. A TV is running on static. Suddenly I have some sort of paranormal experience which freaks me out which seems to be about some recently deceased grandpa or uncle, so I join a forum about that and try not to glance at threads, especially not image threads because I was still very freaked out. I either make a post or read a post that was like the experience I had. The experience might have had something to do with American Indian mythology.

---

School started, so all lucid progress is basically lost until next holidays.

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

I had a normal night's sleep and dreamed some dreams. I woke up about 07.20 and thought about how I normally have lucids when I re-sleep in the morning. I thought that I can sleep how long I want because I have no school until afternoon. I re-slept and had a lucid, woke up and repeated this until I couldn't sleep anymore. I didn't write these in my tag book because I wanted to immediately re-sleep. Each lucid was maybe five minutes each. I forgot to stabilize all of them and think that made them so short and many of them were not realistic.

I am by my home and want to fly to Hemköp. I do so and it goes pretty slowly. I see Hemköp but it isn't Hemköp anymore. It's a maid-shop were all these maids fixed different things.

I woke up and re-entered the same dream from the start.

I am by my home again and decides to go to Hemköp again. I fly there but this time I'm able to fly much faster and I do. I walk into the shop and talk with some maids.

I'm by the woods and the dream doesn't feel real at all (I realize now that I needed to stabilize it). I fly but hear no sounds. I think it's weird so I talk out loud and hear my voice. After a time of flying I hear some birds and I'm relieved that there are sounds in this dream. I land and try to summon a fire in my hand but it fails. I think there is a fire but I can't see it because of the bright light from the sun.

I'm in a house and see a boy about my age. I ask for his name and he replies that he is Julius. I see a small girl that is about 9 years old and ask her for her name.

I'm in a classroom and my swedish teacher is there teaching but she doesn't look like the real swedish teacher. This one is older and bigger.

I'm in a house with a girl and we talk.

Well this was an experience. I wonder if I could have made all of these small dreams into maybe two big dreams with practice. That would be much better. I'm not sure if these were WILD dreams but some of them were I think. I think there were some more dreams but I can't remember them. Here is the dream I dreamed before I woke up 07.20.

I'm downstairs and see a broken sandwich by the counter. I think it's a dream so I do my RC but it fails.

early:
+ Walking outside, I see different kinds of roof tiles lying on the ground: older ones, and newer ones made from a composite of small stones? I think the new ones will be better.
I realize my former PTL neighbor Mar. is changing her roof tiles, we (me and older son) surprise her with a visit, I enter her presence and wait for her to notice me and son#1, she does, and we we briefly hug her and her daughter with a peck on the cheek in greeting

+ in CH, in parents' room, leaning out the side window looking to the front yard, speak to (woman?) giving her directions on how to take off in her flying saucer from the front yard so as not to scorch the surrounding garden. She should take off exactly vertically and not veer to the side so that the engine exhaust will not burn the plants. I give her permission to take off, go out to the street above the house to see her off, think about a farewell with her but she just takes off directly. I am chagrined a bit and wonder why she didn't say goodbye, she starts to circle around, I think to wave at me?, but flies off.

mid:
+ sitting in a car (driver seat?) by a bus stop by LL park, I'm double parked there is another car parked on the curb, the front of my car is aligned with the back of this other car. Every time I look at the bus stop sign I see that there are different digits/numbers recorded there, sometimes in faint reddish paint, I know that these numbers are messages to me/us. I want my friend to come out of his car and get into mine, I move forwards/backwards (honk?) to get his attention. I think that a cop will come over and say that we can't park here. I drive down the street a bit, pull a u-turn to park on the other side of the street. There are places with meters but I don't want to park in those, there is one spot between where the meters begin and driveway, right across from the entrance to a hair salon, (my friend is urging me?) to park right there where it's free. There is white paint with some writing along the sidewalk and I think this may not be a legal parking place, and I'm concerned that the hair salon manager will come out and say this is a reserved spot.

+ at work(?), I'm with tall lady friend, blonde, my arm is around her, she's a designer, something about clear window dividers low down so that our legs can be seen. Lady friend has made a computer animation, I see sort of cartoony version of dark old-style PCs on a table, and they rotate and tumble around and fall. There is a judge (of the animation?) telling a story (words forgotten, but it began "It was not in English"?), I see his arm, something materializes there, turns out he tattooed the message onto his forearm (looks red, his blood? and white stuff around it), and we're amused because he tattooed this message to his arm to remember it while reading it because it wasn't in English, while the message says that it is in a foreign language, it is in fact in English.

Long BTS. Took about 1-1.5 hours. slept another 1-1.5 hours

late:
+ the army doing training exercises arrives back just as a foreign (alien?) attack begins, good timing!, the army leader non-chalantly gives the command to attack, some thought about parrying going on. The army uses spears.

Overall presence and vividness: low to medium.

9th August 2020

Fragment (DFLN thread):

Part of a long dream, the last part revolved around this kid with autism and he'd made an explosion or something. He lived in a mansion all on his own? And he had a rich dad?

I remember at some point there was a fireman and he was the one that told me all about the kid. When he told me the story I felt sorry for the kid somehow. Then the kid had an older brother who was just a nasty and petty and by the end of the dream the kid with autism had been faking it all along and his whole family was mean and petty.

I remember H was with me for most of the dream.

As I mentioned in the DFLN thread:

Originally Posted by DarkestDarkness

To be honest waking up to this dream was a bit disappointing, I had a carrying-over feeling of being disillusioned in people as I became more awake but eventually overcame that through the day.

---

10th August 2020

Dream (DFLN thread):

Recall only the end of the dream, but it was still a long sequence.

I was a police character and I was going somewhere I'd already been to earlier in the dream. The dream was sort of cycling, or repeating, in some way? I'd come here before but as Homer Simpson with Bart. We'd been looking for Marge.

In any case, as the policeman now, I went to this spot to pick someone up, who was already in handcuffs and escorting a woman. This place was in a very busy mall, there were loads of people.

I picked up a police cap off the floor, I knew intuitively that it was mine somehow. I undid and then redid the prisoner's cuffs. Though I don't remember the prisoner character's actual looks, I picked up a wallet which resembled my wallet from waking life. In it, there was a photo of me, but I didn't realise that it was a photo of me. This was who the prisoner was, some "me". So I took him, by the cuffs and we walked down some stairs. Nobody was phased by me as a policeman taking this man in cuffs through the mall.

The mall visually resembled one from my early childhood. This other "me" who I had in custody was being accused of rape, or something?

At some point, I realised better I was holding my police cap in one hand, I hadn't put it back on yet. I remember H's voice at some point and I was talking back in normal dialogue, but H was not physically present. We were discussing typical police caps, and the fact that they have them on at all times, pretty much.

Eventually, as I was walking, the prisoner was not a person anymore but instead a corpse in a body bag. I don't remember how this transition happened. But I remember as I realised this, the body inside the bag went floppy and heavy and I had to adjust my grip. I remember feeling the cuffs on a bony corpse through the bag and I just carried on carrying the body bag in a more dignified way than I had been initially. I woke up while I was still walking.

Very rare zero recall night. Flutterings of fragments from middle of the night wakings, but nothing solidified. Failed BTS at about 5-6 hours, got into deep relaxation but just could not fall asleep, thus missing the major dreaming phase of the night.

Got to bed late (1-1:30am). Going to bed after midnight fairly reliably means less recall. Need to establish a regular bed time.

Tonight! I remember my dreams!

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

I'm outside my house and about to go to Hemmakväll. I know it's a dream and I start to jump as a walk because I'm happy. I look at my hands and I notice my surroundings. It's not like a proper dream but more like I'm visualizing it. It's like a 5 FPS video and I see movement as pictures that change pretty slowly. I start to fly away but don't feel satisfaction because it feels so unreal.