Recent DJ Posts

I'm sitting at the kitchen table at my parents' house. We're talking about "my mansion". The sale can't go through because I can't get finance, but I'm legally bound to purchase it because I've signed the paperwork, and the seller has my one million dollar deposit.

I also have another house with money tied up in it that is wasting away.

This is all due to a mistake my parents have made. I need their help to resolve the issues but they aren't taking it seriously. They seem to be procrastinating. I'm getting impatient as I need the problems sorted out so I can move on.

My dad cracks a joke and I start to get angry. I yell but they keep smiling. I get angrier. I yell a lot, trying to get them to hear me. Then they give me the impression there's something I don't know about that they are dealing with. I don't know if it's financial or medical. I try to get answers but my mother just keeps smiling.

I get the impression one of them is seriously ill. I start to get hysterical, yelling and crying. I need to know what is wrong. Finally my mother says there is no problem. Nobody is ill. There is nothing to worry about.

The next morning I go to my kitchen and there is someone there. She says something about someone getting fired. I ask why I'm being fired and she says it's not me, it's my mother, she has lost her job. Our fight was on TV and people are angry that she made me think something was horribly wrong when it wasn't.

I am at a train station with Melissa. There is a slight platform with a ticket booth on it and three terminals beyond it at 12, 3, and 9 o’clock. We approach and the lady asks us which we’ll need a ticket for. I tell her that I honestly don’t really know, but that we’re going to Colorado, so whichever that one might be. She doesn’t really offer much help, but another girls shows up and says that’s right by Nebraska, pointing us to the train to our left. We get our tickets and head over to it. I briefly wonder how we’ll actually get to Colorado from wherever this train takes us. When I search Nebraska on my map, it looks like it is right by Colorado, so much so that when I zoom out they pretty much blend together. We now seem to be on the train, which looks more like a room with seats along the walls. The seats look like red velvet or like the ones in movie theaters. There is a female couple that we’re going to be sitting by; there’s a slight confusion of people already sitting, people starting to sit, and people like me what are figuring out where they’re going to sit. I end up sitting by one of the girls, and Melissa will be on my left.

I am with Melissa and some unfamiliar others in what seems like someone’s home. There is some event going on where we are being fed. There is a long table with toppings and ingredients for hot dogs. There are a couple of ladies seated behind the table, serving. This table seems to be in a slight alcove. I am up now and getting jalapenos on my bun. I then get a hot dog. There is a small thing of mayo that I’m going to spread on with a knife. I think the mustard is in a squeeze bottle (*I seem to wake up right at this point).

I am with Melissa and she is driving us either to or from Mom’s so I can grab something really quick. I don’t recognize the car, but it seems like a mid size SUV. it is dark out. Melissa is in underwear and a white bra and I am wearing a towel. I see in the mirror a cop car a few cars behind us, so I tell Melissa to use her turn signal. She somewhat defiantly asks why and I tell her to just do it. She does, as she moves into the empty lane to the right (there are 3-4 lanes and it looks pretty much like S. Virginia). I see the cop car get over right behind us. I see Melissa see it and get why I was telling her to use her signal. She has her elbow propped on the window ledge and her head propped on her fist; she looks sort of sadly resigned. The cop looks like he could be running the plates or something. I wonder if he can see our state of dress from this angle and wonder what the implications would be. He is wearing some weird circular glass piece over one of his eyes, kind of like a monocle but larger and more steampunk looking. I think I saw him earlier.



(fragment) I am somewhere outside with Mom and some unfamiliar? others. We’re on a small jetty of tannish boulders on what is probably a very small lake. It looks like the clear water is about ten feet down and I am planning on jumping into it (it’s so clear that the ground and submerged boulder look close, but I know they’re deeper than they appear) until Mom tells me that the water is actually right at my feet. Sure enough, I move them and stir up the water. It’s refreshingly cool.



(fragment) I’m with Scott in a rental car. We’re at a red light when I notice that he’s in the back, I’m in the passenger’s seat, and no one is in the driver’s seat. It seems like he is casually expecting me to drive. I look to the red light and then quickly hop into the driver’s seat. I buckle up and I think put it in drive as the light turns, accelerating not too far behind the car in front of us. I’m driving around a long corner, like an off ramp, and almost hit the cement barrier, steering pretty hard to avoid it and get back on course. I think I was going too fast, but the car also seems hard to control.

I am walking around at work (it looks very different, still like a department store, but not the one I work at) when Ryan calls 432 and says “I need change.” I am not on a phone and think I actually hear him say it since I just so happen to be a few yards from the register he is at. I see three different women in his view and figure one must be who he is calling about. Two look like moms with strollers. The other looks more suspicious, with sunglasses and a large purse. I think they all see me and take off running. There is a small pile of wadded up dresses on the ground that I think the girl with the purse must have dumped. There is also a set of keys, which I pick up and keep. I am now briefly in a room or at a table taking a picture of one of the keys (or some metal piece attached to a key) that has some identifying number on it. I think Laynie is here now and we are watching this girl. She goes somewhere downstairs a bit before going upstairs. I thought she would have been spooked, but it seems like we think she might still steal. I’m now walking around and getting ready to close when I notice there are still a lot of people here.

(fragment) I am outside and walking along a thin dirt trail. It descends a short but steep incline, crosses what looks like a thin dry creek, and then ascends another hill. There is a lady coming down the incline opposite me. She stops and makes sure no one is coming before she crosses the dry creek. I see her do this and give her a thumbs up to let her know she’s clear. She then passes me and makes a rude, unjust comment about me doing that for her. Angry, I aggressively cuss her out. I don’t get why she would get angry over my doing that.



(fragment) I am in a store and debating buying a book. It is a slender book of current need-to-know beers written by a woman. It seems too short, but I think it could be a good addition to my collection, especially since the small, yellowish sticker on it informs me that it’s only $1. I think I start off but then go back for it

I am with Dad at his house. I think it looks mostly the same, but the view out of the front window is different. Instead, there is a view of a slight desert ravine or at least some fairly steep desert hills. There is nothing but sand, rock, and sagebrush until a very tiny patch of what looks like buildings on the very far horizon. In a corner of the house opposite the window there is some machine, no bigger than a small couch, that apparently launches missiles/bombs. I think there is an atom bomb, a hydrogen bomb, and a magnet bomb? The last is the smallest, but still a very serious bomb. One of the larger bombs, still a long, thin cylindrical shape that fits on the device, is loaded and ready to be sent to Russia. I think this must have been Dad’s idea, and it is all very nonchalant. It has been launched out through the open front window now, and I am waiting. After a while, I see dark clouds forming on the horizon. They aren’t really black, but look more like storm clouds. After these clouds form, I see dense, white smoke. It is coming this way, slowly, from my vantage point. The sunlight seems to dim here now, and I look again at the approaching white smoke. The mass is travelling up the hills, and I know it won’t stop for us. The ravine’s length is quickly becoming consumed; it is moving a bit faster than I thought possible at this distance. I fear it might break the window, so I turn away and move towards the kitchen. In an instant, the light is drained, looking like there is an eclipse or total, dark cloud cover. It is only the smoke though, as I hear it pass over the house with an airy impact, like a plane passing through clouds. I see it cover the far windows and pass seemingly slower than it came. I wonder what Russia looks right now, what city had the most impact, what history has been completely erased or rewritten. I then wonder who will retaliate and send a bomb to the US, thinking it inevitable. I think about dying like that, and it is not something I want. It all feels too real.

I am at 10 Torr for a celebration for one of the cousin’s graduation. This place looks similar, but not exactly the same. It seems to be a little smaller and a bit more homey. It’s still a square room but has more of a kitchen vibe due to the counter and the décor. It also seems to be wrapping up; Aly is behind the counter, putting things away. It seems like nobody is left at this point. I was going to try one more drink, but I’ll be fine without it. Mom is sitting with me at the counter. It looks like it’s going to be closed now, but then a 20-something year old guy shows up behind the bar. It seems they’re now open or regular business. Two girls, maybe in their late 20s or early 30s, are already taking a seat at the bar. The guy looks to them, looking a little disheveled. The girl closer to me starts ordering something with orange/grapefruit juice, but the girl by her completely cuts her off, ordering something with the same juice but a little more specific. The guy doesn’t seem to care; he lets her finish and then turns to the first girl to let her finish. The first girl waits a moment and then makes a snide comment to the other. The guy is now looking to us. I notice two small, empty glasses on the counter in front of us, and it worries me for a moment, making me think for some reason that Mom might have a drink. I ask for ‘just a coffee liqueur and vodka’, oddly self conscious of my voice. Mom orders something kind of specific that I’ve never heard of; it sounds like some kind of mock tail. The drinks come out quickly, and it looks like they’re in small white bowls and not glasses. Mom’s looks like a strawberry ice cream or really frothy strawberry milk topped with whipped cream and a slice of banana. Mine looks like it has cream in it and then it tastes like it does too. When the guy comes back over I assertively but kindly tell him what it was supposed to be, and he fixes it. I now try Mom’, and it does seem nonalcoholic. Her face looks a little sad to me. Melissa has been waiting in a car outside, and I’ve been texting her. She’s being kind of sassy. I’m not sure why she’s just been waiting out there. I look outside and briefly see her and it looks like she’s changed into a pajama shirt.



(fragment) I am outside and climbing/ scrambling around on some granite boulders all together and overlapping one another. I hear Kat? narrating like Jon (or Luke Larson?) is climbing, though it’s definitely just me here. She is sort of talking it up and pointing out the danger of the boulders being right behind you. I am in street shoes and sort of pulling on some holds and playing with different moves. The grainy holds are pretty decent and slightly chalked. I don’t think it’s even completely vertical, and I don’t think it’s all that hard. I think the boulder behind you is close enough that you could put out a leg or arm and stop yourself before you would fall into it. This small boulder field slowly turns into the top of a backyard. I’m standing on top of the smaller boulders with Kat, looking toward the house. There is a small, neat lawn and a few neat trees nearer the house. The house also gives the impression of being neat.



(fragment) I am at work with Laynie and a small group has done a grab and run out of the door 18 emergency exit. We catch up with them in the stairwell. It’s about 3-4 teens or preteens. One of the girls is reminiscent of the blond 13 year old girl that was taking pictures of herself doing gang signs. She sort of talks back, but ultimately we are in control. We are being hard on them but they seem to not get it. I think we have them out in the parking lot.



(fragment) I’m with Scott and Tyson? downtown when they see something going on through a hotel room. We are going to go in to see what’s going on. These hotel rooms seem to be in an overpass that we are walking under. I don’t like not being able to see and not really know what’s going on. I think it has to do with a shooting or someone with a gun.

I am with Melisa in Switzerland. Apparently, Alex has come here for a week or two and we decided to buy plane tickets and go as well. It seems like it hardly took any time to get here. I realize that I haven’t brought a change of clothes (or anything else, seemingly). This is slightly discomforting since I don’t know how long we’re going to be here. I’m under the impression that we aren’t staying that long (maybe a day or so?) but probably long enough to need a change of clothes. I think we are on a bus. The scenery sort of looks like Ireland. I think I do feel pretty far from home. There is a guy here what is speaking with a pretty heavy German? accent; everyone else is speaking English without an accent.

I tried very hard. It was pretty much Ada. Perhaps maybe 10 min longest of non awareness or mindfulness.

No lds though. A bit disappointing and dissuading. But it was very interesting to be able to observe every thought. I did not do it as hard today but I still practiced it for most of the day. It helped to change or redirect a certain negative thought pattern for sure. Astounding progress in certain ways really if you don't consider it only as a ld practice.

I tried injecting thoughts regarding dream each time my thoughts wandered to help question reality while dreaming.

I did do mild with sw and got some excitement but maybe not 100% feeling. Nor did I visualize it much. I thought I did well but I could probably improve a lot more.

Dreams :

Had 3 long ones, 2 notes were gibberish though. I should just take 1 second longer to make 2 words legible then id remember it all.

I was on the upper most floor of the jap school. My teacher was doing a presentation I recall she was not one that I liked. Me and a friend decide to play hooky. I wanted to go to bathroom so we leave. We head down the stairs to the right and pass classrooms of kids from lower grades.

We head to the right on the ground floor and we pass through the kindergarten area. I ask them how to get to bathroom. Etc

We go further and into hell or something similar. Hot lava place. Pretty nice temp. We gotta get some thing to help us through demons down here. Although most are chill some are not. We end up getting a familiar or something like a fire elemental.

Long arse journey. We go through many series of puzzles and rooms, fighting some drunk demons by bars and gain new abilities and what not as we progress to get to...

The bathroom. It was pretty dirty there.

Peed in dream but I was safe. Decided to wake up to check.

Perhaps a little lucid in the end after all.

Someone says the tide is too high at Ahipara. I'm thinking if it's not covering the road it's not that high. I want to go and have a look.

I'm on the beach, running away from the waves, trying to reach safety. As the water reaches me I lift my feet so I'm in a sitting position and ride the wave until I can run again. I do this repeatedly with each surge of waves until I reach a hill I can scramble up.

I'm safe and watching the waves down below with my dad. He says there's been a murder. I look around and he points and says there are thirty Dragon Gang members. I see them in the distance, emerging from a bush area near the beach.


I'm in a room with a girl, a guy friend, and a Dragon Gang member. Other Dragon Gang members enter the room and drag my guy friend away to murder him.

Now there's just me, the girl and the original Dragon Gang member in the room. He makes me pull strange faces and find dimples on the side of each eye and along my jaw. I have the ones by my eyes but can't find them along my jaw line. He tires of waiting and says I have lots along my jaw. I'm scared. He says he has a sore foot and I say I have a sore foot too.

He wants to take me for a ride with another gang member. We go outside and I sense he's going to drive me somewhere to murder me. I run for it and get into my old white van. The two Dragon Gang members get into a black sports car.

I am far ahead but worried they will catch up because they have a sports car. Suddenly, instead of being behind me, I see them coming toward me on the other side of the road. I know they'll turn around and chase me. I am desperate now. I decide to drive off a high bridge, through a wooden railing and into deep, murky water.

I'm standing on some grass, trying to pull up my underwear. Antoinette drives past and laughs at me because I'm too fat. She is upset with me for not meeting weekly anymore. She tells me she canceled my meeting with someone else and laughs as she drives away.

I walk for a long way and come across a boy looking off into the distance, towards my left. He looks peaceful and happy. I look where he's looking expecting a beautiful view but there is only an empty dirt road stretching into the distance, grass, and a tree here and there.

I look up into some tree tops and see an arm reaching from one tree to another. It's reaching toward an alligator. The arm belongs to a giant ape-like creature. No wonder it's not afraid of the alligator.

Suddenly the creature starts to sit down on me, crushing me. Then it stands up a bit and I see a coconut falling from its body.

Next scene, I'm in a bathroom washing off excrement from the ape-like creature.