false awakening

Went to an apartment viewing yesterday, I dreamed about living in that apartment, but conciously remembered that I was still living in my old one and it felt like trespassing. I waited for the roommate to leave and went to my old apartment. When I went outside, though, the street suddenly turned into a. industrial area.

Dream was surprisingly in Dutch, but in hindsight the person in question looked and sounded like someone from an international theatre project from years ago instead of the roommate.

I was in the hallway of my old community college, browsing my social media when I saw a tweet from a chillwave artist I wanted to see live but won't because the festival tickets are beyond expensive.

The artist spoke about this fictional artist called Ferrol Farraque, apparently a city pop artist they used to sample. Someone even subtweeted "Go sing over Ferrol Farraque again"

Thos mysterious artist usually keeps to themselves, even their interview was just them saying a whole lot of nothing.

Then I saw them at my community college through the door talking to someone, but they're voice was muted and it just showed subtitles saying they're never playing at this event again after this.

I go downstairs and they do a panel where I can here their voices a little when paying close attention.

I then wake up in a room with someone else, we're colleages apparently and we overslept, my colleague takes the blame by premiering their music video over a projector in the hallway while the supervisor is mad at them.


I then wake up and snooze multiple times in real life as I'm still tired.
Been sleep poorly lately, got early shifts at work and no apartment yet while I have to move out soon.

Dream was in English.

Not having eaten much as well as starting to eat healthy combined with going to bed late, I've been very tired with dreamless nights lately, I squeezed in as many alarms between waking up and work as possible.

My dream remnants this morning consisted of me hearing my phone alarm but not from my phone, getting the Idea that it came from somewhere else (maybe my roommates) I then started dreaming about how some sort of chip was placed into my body that automatically sets off alarms.

A LOT happened last night. I went to sleep at my normal time, 11:30. This time my goal was to do an RC in my dream. Did MILD (poorly) till I drifted off.

Dream #1 (Non-Lucid):
First thing I can remember is me walking up the sidewalk in my neighborhood, thinking about how calling someone could potentially result in a bomb being dropped nearby. (Before this point multiple bombs had already been dropped but I can't remember any specifics, might've even been a false memory.) I came to a stop at a place where I could look down at the grassy area between two rows of houses, and a line of trees/bushes 25 feet in. I called J for some reason, with a feeling (though not a hope) that a bomb would drop on the pool about a mile away... and it did.

The explosion was vivid, albeit unrealistic. I saw the mushroom cloud billow up and felt the vibrations in the air and under my feet, and the wind was especially tangible. I ducked between two cars as it blew against me, still holding my phone, with a tinge of uneasiness. I thought, "These bombs are interesting once in a while, but only once in a while... Then again, if I selfishly enjoy even them even once, perhaps I should accept them happening all the time with no complaints... but no, why should it be that way? I'll want what I want, when I want!" It was quite a realistic thought process.

(A note: I'm pretty sure this same explosion actually happened earlier in a slightly different way, with me behind rather than between the cars, but my subconscious rewinded and edited it. That happens fairly often in my dreams.)

The wind kept coming, and suddenly it really picked up, stronger than all the previous bombs. I held onto the car handles to support myself and move forward while listening to the cars on the highway smash into each other, to the sound of screeching metal. I was only thinking vaguely about how weirdly easy it was for me and the cars near me to stay still in comparison.

Then for some reason all the highway cars appeared in the line of trees in front of me, except one totally wrecked and empty one which was much closer to me on the grass. Tons of people spilled out and were fleeing into the woods, and that's when J and her twin sister L appeared. I told them enthusiastically what happened ("The wind was so strong it pushed the cars and I could hear the collisions!"), not mentioning that I was the cause of it. L almost interrupted me once but I spoke over her.

J was like "wow" and I'm a little confused about this part, but apparently only parents were able to flee by going through the line of cars into the woods... kids weren't allowed? We hopped through the empty car anyway but nothing happened.

Anyway, L was apparently a graphic artist in this dream and had to go somewhere to draw. J and I went with, to a random and dark parking lot, and I brought along my own drawing tablet. I had to remember how to use it and did so by accessing real-life memories of it in my room and of plugging it into a computer. Not sure what happened during this time but L eventually turned into S and we were making a story together, drawing the two main characters. She drew a teen girl in a somewhat grainy and realistic art style that vaguely resembled Tinkerbell. I was probably drawing the other character, a man in his twenties. In the story, they were both prisoners helping each other escape. I remember specifically that the girl escaped first and was going to break his restraints so they could leave together, although they didn't know each other well and he was kind of a gruff and unfriendly guy.

S held up their drawing and said that they liked the sketch, so they weren't going to pay anyone for a better version. (I'll just include this here: I think some time in this dream I was at S's house and their dad was speaking condescendingly to me, but I have no idea when this occurred.)

Then some stuff happened that I don't remember, all I know is that I was acting like a baby (pouting and whining), so J treated me like one (but not meanly). We went to a gas station, I think to buy some build-it-yourself Japanese-speaking machine, though I don't remember what for. In addition I bought some Cow Tales, permanently-locked measuring tape, and small, blue-wrapped candies, wanting to spend the little money I had for whatever reason. (This definitely also happened before in a slightly different way and was rewinded by my subconscious. I think the first time I got functional measuring tape.) I remember walking to the cash register, but I don't remember paying.

Next scene I can recall is being in a large room with a wooden floor, sitting on a bench/bed with my dad. I think there were a few other people in the background as well, and the permanently-locked measuring tape was on the bench-bed. It had a green sticker warning people not to unlock it, with an X'd out image of the down-arrow safety lock and the number 4. I figured that meant you had to move the safety lock downward four times to unlock it. I went "Hmm" and decided to try it. I asked my dad what would happen while I did so, not believing it could be too bad or dangerous—after all, it was a company, they couldn't sell stuff like that!

It snapped open before he answered, and small circular serrated blades (like shuriken) burst out in all directions. I jumped off the bench and subconsciously prevented myself from being stabbed right away because it would mess up the plot. For the same reason, my dad did not get injured, even though he was right next to it. I was supposed to be the sole target, he was supposed to watch. I was somewhat aware of this choice... even thinking something like "(dream) logic" in the back of my mind. (And AGAIN, something similar happened earlier in the dream but I subconsciously erased it—maybe it was too difficult and I got hit by the blades.)

Belatedly answering my question, my dad calmly said, "A bunch of blades would pop out." Well gee, thanks, Father. I can see that.

I slumped on the floor to dodge the blades, but they kept spinning around in somewhat predictable patterns. I was stuck in the corner of the room dodging them, not able to move properly due to fear. It was scary and quite vivid; so was my hyperventilating (which was intentional but also not) when I finally managed to get away. My dad said unsympathetically, "That's how bugs feel every day." I briefly imagined it; the atoms and minuscule organisms in the air dodging my legs as I ran. Then I woke up.

———

It was 3:40 or so when I woke up and at first I did not remember anything except the very last scene of the dream, and even that was fading. But somehow I managed to focus and backtrack all the way back to where I started the entry. I didn't finish writing till 4:34, then I lay down and attempted WILD, repeating "reality check, reality check" in my head. It didn't take as long as a couple days ago but it did take a while before I finally fell back asleep.

———

Dream #2 (Non-Lucid):
This dream may not have been lucid but it sure was interesting. I started out sitting up in my bed, looking down at a giant yellow slug-caterpillar thing on the mattress. I whimpered and flipped it over, trying to push it off, but I didn't push hard enough. Then I thought, "Wait, this is probably just a hypnopompic hallucination!" and stared at it till it went away.

But now I was curious, and tried to take advantage of my supposedly sleepy state. I stared at my sheets and tried to visualize chicken nuggets. At first they showed up as those blob-lights you sometimes see when you close your eyes, but I focused on one until it cleared up and was a real chicken nugget.

Tentatively, I picked it up, fascinated that I could really feel it. (I was briefly reminded of Koomer and Oguigi from my tulpa phases.) Slowly I lifted it to my mouth and bit down, and it tasted so real! A bit on the watery side but whatever. I thought, "I have to tell J about this" and was imagining it, then I think I woke up briefly before entering another dream.

Dream #3 (Lucid):
This time I was in the bathroom washing my hands, but the faucet was weird. When I turned the hot water on, the water would stop running altogether, and I could bend the knob all the way backwards. It freaked me out a little to be honest and the possibility of dreaming popped into my head.

I thought "No way" but did a nose-plug RC anyway, and there it was—that explosion of air like in my semi-lucid a few days ago! I couldn't believe it and stumbled backward in shock. My reflection disappeared and the mint-green walls seemed strangely oppressive and unsettling. I tried to get a hold of myself, crouching down and rubbing my hands together, but it was too late. I woke up.

...Except I didn't, because it was a false awakening! My first one EVER! I don't know why—I always forget to RC in the morning—but as I was listening to the sound of my dad opening the shower door in the bathroom, something must have tipped me off because I plugged my nose and breathed. And I could breathe! Normally! It didn't feel stuffy or explosive! I was so amazed I did it twice, then sat up, grinning and feeling my sheets on my skin. It actually felt a little oversensitive, like when you're sick and your nerves are fried.

I climbed down from my bed (it's a bunk bed) and saw my youngest brother sleeping on the floor, though I didn't think much of it. I remembered my steps but only briefly checked for false memories, skipped RC because I already did it, then whisper-asked for my dream guide to come through the door. (Whispering because it was dark and quiet in the room.) Nothing happened so I asked again, thinking that my expectations were not high enough.

While I waited, I turned my attention to the Miku poster on the door. There was no coat rack like in real life and it was taking up the entirety of the door, maybe the doorframe too. The art looked different, better than in real life, and I leaned closer, saying aloud, "Miku is really beautiful, huh." [I know I'm a trashy weeb okay? ]

But then I remembered a DJ post (by Nerefa) that I read yesterday, about dream faces not being as realistic as they seemed, only as much as your waking-life awareness. I wondered if she would actually look ugly upon closer inspection, and when I peered into her face it turned derpy. I assumed it was just because I was expecting it rather than my real-life awareness being that bad, and I must have sensed myself waking up because I was thinking, "Maybe if I had stayed focused on the dream guide this wouldn't have happened..." And then I woke up, for real this time, at 5:55.

Dream #4 (Lucid; Fragment):
Okay so this happened before I woke up, but I don't know where it fits in relation to everything else. I was mentally explaining to someone (possibly myself, or imagining telling someone in the future) that my DJ was occasionally censored when a topic like suicide or self-harm came up because I didn't want people snooping and seeing that. I said that I sometimes couldn't remember these scenes properly even when I read them again, because I was so vague in my DJ.

Eventually I was in my bed looking at a (false) entry with a self-harm scene, but my dream journal was all cut up. The part mentioning SH was cut in a way that the word "WHAT?" was spelled out. So someone had seen this entry, understood it despite my censorship and vagueness, and was concerned.

I had been exposed and obviously felt dread and shock, but at the same time remembered that I have a lot of dreams of being exposed by people in real life. Maybe it was because I desperately wanted to deny the situation, but I was sure that it was a dream. I said aloud, "No, this isn't real. It's a dream, it must be."

Then I think I performed a successful nose-plug RC, and that's all I remember.

———

Well, that took a while. But now my lucid count is up to 10! Here are some quick sketches of the dream scenes:

I was living with two ambient artists, we all slept on our own bed in one room together. The other two artists were entertained by my alarm clock sound. I had several false awakenings in this scenario this morning.

I also performed ballet while pole dancing for a song which unironically sounds like interesting promo material.
We also had spectrograms of our alarm clock sounds which made interesting covers.

Dream was in English.

I fell asleep without setting an alarm clock today. Woke up on time and realised I just fell asleep.

That dream was very short and about me meeting an experimental musician I saw perform live a few weeks ago. She had a new song out and it had a Spotify canvas of a video filmed from underneath her looking right into her skirt
That was especially weird because I deleted Spotify over a year ago.

I then woke up at 6:30 am and remembered I was going to work at my home office today anyways (I was going to be late if I went to work on site today)
so I set the alarm for 40 more minutes.

I can't recall my dream of any but was still so tired I feel right back asleep after turning off the alarm, oops.

During this dream I was dreaming about there being a supermarket across the place I live at and me cleaning the floor with a broom. My friend from Luxembourg showed up and asked me if I worked here when in some hilariously meta moment I realised that I had a job and needed to clock in ASAP. I went back home to my home office to log in and woke up, still on time fortunately.

Shout out capitalism fr

This dream was in English.

Pre-WBTB

Fragment
I'm in a labyrinth maze. Viewpoint is from above.

Fragment
The Youtuber ProJared and somebody else is giving an apology speech on Distractible. It's a video, and Distractible is apparently a streaming platform like Spotify. I'm looking up what their policy is. My girlfriend SB says that they don't have a policy.

Post-WBTB

Actually woke up moments before my alarm went off. That's pretty neat. I took my supplements, used the restroom, and wrote down this entry. I slept just about 5 hours and 45 minutes, so in theory I should be entering REM cycle 4 at its' end. Maybe unstable dreams then? Hope not. Maybe I can get into REM cycle 5 from the get go after that.

I tossed and turned for quite a while. I was worried that I had wasted my time and the timing reset on the supplements (once a week for Galantamine if not using Piracetam). My phone goes off (who the hell is texting me at 7AM, savages) so I put it in airplane mode. That'll show 'em.

Supplement Interaction Gone Wrong
I'm tossing and turning in bed and I notice that I'm feeling nauseous. I fall over the side of my bed and struggle to get my vision into focus. Something must have gone wrong with the supplements and the alcohol. I feel drunk. SB is outside our room calling out to me.

"I have four parents here!" she said.

She probably wants some help hosting, I think.

"Wait four? Are any of our friends there?" I ask.

She replies in the negative. Great. So there are four people there that I probably don't know terribly well that I now need to entertain. And I feel drunk. I decide that the best thing I can do is try to sleep it off and then go help, so I get on the bed and rollback over.

Post-WBTB

Thank god. I'm awake and I feel better. There hasn't been an alcohol-supplement interaction. Nobody is visiting us at 7AM. I can resume my WILD attempts. I'm very relieved about this so I relax easier. SB has gotten up to start the day so I have the whole bed to myself. REM cycle 5 here we go. Vibrations eventually show up.

I start to see images slowly forming. I remember my past success visualizing my hands to 'grab' the dream, so I try to recreate that. I see a pinhole image at the end of the void. It looks like a beach. I start thinking about things I could grab onto. I see some streetlights. Perfect. I imagine the feeling of gripping the cold metal, and visualize my hands closing around them. I can already see my arms outstretched, and my right hand closing around the lamp.

California Chaos
I'm standing on a beach reminiscent of the California Boardwalk, holding onto a metal streetlight in my right hand. It's a beautiful sunny day. I've done it again! Successful WILD #2!


Beachside Bars. Made with Holara AI.

The first thing I do is approach a portly-looking man at a beachside bar and side down next to him. He vaguely looks like RR from work, or Carlos Mencia. I turn to him.

"Hey man. What if I were to tell you that this was a dream?" I say.

"WOAH. No way!" He casually dismisses the suggestion.

"Oh yeah? Then what about THIS!?"

I attempt to put my right index finger through my left palm to demonstrate a reality check, but I can't do it.

To be fair, I've never actually done that before. But looking back this is pretty funny. In the moment, it was also pretty funny.

"Okay forget that... then what about THIS?!"

I hold up my hand and count the fingers on it...1-2-3-4-5...6-7-8!

"WOAH. That's insane!" He exclaims.

"I'm gonna go cause trouble if you wanna come with me?" I ask him.

"Nah I'm good." He replies.

I get up. It would've been cool to create chaos with a partner in crime. I forgot all about trying to summon Aeon (name I've given to the dream-guide from the Desert planet). I'm wanting to get her advice on the dream world and see if I can ask her to make me lucid whenever she sees me in a non-lucid dream. I wander down the Boardwalk and come up to some cute girls sitting at a high-top table. I figure, it's a dream I can do whatever I want.

Spoiler for Spicy Content:

I ask one of them to stand up and bend over. She's wearing jorts. I spank her ass. Nice.

Anyway, moving on. I continue walking along the Boardwalk and come up on a brick wall. I recognize that the texture would be good to help stabilize, so I start rubbing the wall like a weirdo for a bit. Can't recall if it did anything other than make me look like a weirdo.

As I walked down the Boardwalk, I noticed that the dream started to fade to black. Instinctually, I started to focus on my arms, and gripping the dream. It is hard to describe, but I actively was resisting letting the dream fade. Miraculously, it worked. The dream was back, and I was still walking on that sunny day in the boardwalk.

I come upon some stairs going down into a sewer-like structure down below. I think to myself:

"Y'know, that seems like a great way to cause a nightmare...screw it! I'm going for it."


The Tunnel and the Stairs. Made with Holara AI.

I start to descend the stairs. As I go down, I think to try and summon KF from high-school. Sure enough, when I get to the bottom of the stairs, I see her but her face is obscured. The bottom of the stairs reminds me of the bottom of the wells from the Forest Temple in The Legend of Zelda Ocarina of Time. KF walks by me quickly and she seems upset about something so I don't bother her. I try to project comfort and warmness her way and say:

"Hey K, I'm going exploring, do you want to come with?" I ask.

I don't get a reply, but she does stop and turn, and then turned back and walked away. I decide to move on.

I find some more stairs going up at the end of the sewer tunnel. There is a great big door. I think:

"Ah! I can use this to get to that elven forest I've been trying to get to!"

Which actually is one of my goals and has been for some time now. Really great memories of waking life in this dream. I focus on what I want the elven forest to look like (tall grey trees as far as the eye can see, fog) and open the door.

Sunny neighborhood cul-de-sac. Nope. Not what I want. I close the door and try again.

Again with the neighborhood. Come on man...I try one more time.

Still the neighborhood. Well, damn it. I guess we're going to the neighborhood. I step out of the sewer door and into the neighborhood. There actually is a grassy knoll with the great big door leading into a sewer behind me, so I give my brain consistency points for that one. Maybe that's why it wouldn't give me the elven forest, because it couldn't find a way to drop a sewer into it.

I'm walking up to the circular end street of the homes and enjoying the sun. I have another blackout-recovery episode and save the dream. Maybe I am getting close to waking. I look around and find no DCs or areas of interest. I decide to fly. I put my arms out in front of me Superman-style and takeoff. The feeling of flight doesn't feel as robust as it normally does. More like a light pickup on the wind. The dream starts to fade shortly after I am in the air, and I don't save it this time.

Pixar VR Concert
I'm standing in a central plaza. It makes me think of the Nintendo Wii U game Nintendo Land. It's all in virtual reality which is pretty darn cool. There are a bunch of concerts going on, maybe six that you can walk to. Each has an assortment of characters from famous franchises from Pixar or Disney or whatever. I can't remember specifics except for Mr. Hippo from Five Nights at Freddy's. Obviously he must be the main attraction here because his monologues are bomb as fuck. Some time later there is a tank of water and I'm helping clean it up. One of the characters is awkwardly making a pass at me but I don't recall details.

Notes
All things accounted for, I'm pretty happy with this night of dreaming. I interacted with multiple dream characters, successfully saved the dream from fading several times, summoned a DC, had some great recall for goals, and performed a teleport (although it didn't take me where I wanted, that's still progress). That also makes 5 uses of the Yuschak Primary Trigger, after which the author suggests that the reader has enough experience to try out other supplements. I'm not sure I will, but it is something to consider.

Conditions
2 drinks of alcohol
No workout, unhealthy dinner
5hr45m/10m WBTB
5th Yuschak Primary Trigger Attempt (8Mg Galantamine, 250Mg Choline Bitartrate)

Yesterday like 2 days ago I played asrm during WBTB but nothing happened. I just didn’t drift off. But today I had exactly the same circumstances like 2 days ago:
- I went sleep at 0200 local time
- I woke up circa at 0730
-Before nap I drunk 1 cup of coffee
- At 0945 I went back to bed with prepared asrm
As in previous attempts I had problem with falling asleep so the fact is this ASRM is working as anchor. Good enough because even if I must wait 40-50 minutes to drift off still I’m relaxed so I don’t feel anger, mad or other negative waiting-related emotions.
Btw I never had so low "cooldown" between lucid dreams. Usually I must wait 2-3 weeks for next LD, so 2 days it is very quickly!

Dream 1 (lucid)
I had sleep paralyze when I realize fact I’m sleeping. I tried move my left hand but it was blocked. Alse I felt very unpleasant feeling on right side of my chest. I felt my body is bending I direction of that feeling but I tried to let my hair down (this is my first time when I’m using this idiom so I don’t know if this is understandable – I’m tried to be relaxed). And I woke up.
I went to toilet. When I looked into mirror I saw my face have some kind of offset. I don’t know how to describe this – it was a little bit moved. Then I saw my head in mirror is rotating slowly. “Oh c’mon. What the fuck. Of course this is dream” I though. I went outside of toilet and my grandfather went inside. I recognize that everything are light (I’m – in almost every dream, especially in LD, I have night. Sometimes I’m almost blind so dark my dreams are) “This is not night time, weird. Maybe this isn’t a dream?” I used nose plug RC and I check my hand shape – It’s dream. And in this moment I woke up.

Dream 2 (non lucid)
I spend more minutes in bed so I drift off again. But this time I had short non lucid dream. I was onboard as 3rd officer. I was repairing valve from firefighting system.

Yesterday I got an idea that I can play ASRM from Pornhub on earphones during WBTB so even if I fail then still I have chance for nice dream. And I done this.
First, in morning (0630 am) I set up alarm clock and I woke up. According with the plan I played prepared looped ASRM and I went back to sleep. I had problem with falling to sleep and max what I got it was deep relax. Not bad but it wasn’t my goal. I spend 1 hour in bed and I woke up.
Next, because of cancelled 2h of e-learning I had some time for nap so I repeated my procedure. At 0950 I went to bed and I played prepared looped ASRM. First about 20 minutes was the same – just regular relax but I decided to stay in bed anyway. After few more minutes I fell asleep.

Dream 1 (lucid)
I restored my awareness in late pre-dream state. Right before the dream started. I felt like my eyes was trying to open by itself so I was focused on keeping my eyes closed. But they opened anyway. “Fuck it” - I thought and woke up. Habitually I grabbed my phone for time checking and before I even looked at my phone I recognized fact I’m in dream. I felt sleepy and dizzy and I hardly stand on my feet. Anyway I reminded that I wish to talk with my subconscious so I went to my door with intention with that intention. When I opened the door I saw nothing. Next room was much more darker and the only thing what I saw (exclude empty corridor) shadow (and only shadow) of unspecified person. I went to next door with same intention – I want summon my subconscious behind door but next room was empty. After that I woke up.

I still had 1 more hour of free time so I stayed in bed and I drifted off almost instantly.

Dream 2 (lucid)
I don’t remember that dream very well. And to be honest that lucid dream was more like half lucid but still this is success for me.
I was in my bed. I saw via my opened door that my mother and grandfather come back to home so I decided to do nothing. For some reasons I didn’t recognized them as NPC although I was aware that I’m in dream.

I woke up and again instantly drifted off.

Dream 3 (non lucid)
This dream wasn’t lucid BUT… BUT it was about I was making entry in DJ on this forum. And in this dream I made well accurate description of 2 previouse lucid dreams. Even somebody replayed to me but I don’t remember what about it was.

I’m not sure if I woke up after that dream or not

Dream 4 (lucid)
Same like in dream no. 2 that dream was more like half lucid and my memory from this dream isn’t perfect. Anyway, I remember much more than in dream 2.
Because I was still hearing ASRM so I decided to make some fun. But for some reason I didn’t even tried to summon someone to play with me and I spent that time alone :/

Dream 5 (non lucid)
I was playing in video game. Something between simcity and city skyline. Nothing special, BUT… sometimes in that dream I was thinking about lucid dreaming

Summary: That nap was awesome! It’s my record in LD chaining. And even non lucid dreams were related with lucidity. Tomorow I have free day, so I will do the same thing
I'm wondering on one thing. What exactly helped me with lucidity? It passed almost one month when I started with ADA and in this period of time this is 4th "lucid-related event" (I'm counting failed WILD during competition when I was close to enter into dream), so my theory is: That asrm probably is working as anchor for me and because I'm training ADA so maybe my WILD skill is boosted?

Ignoring Work and the Jungle
I'm at my desk at work. My coworker D is sitting next to me explaining something. Others nearby are listening intently, but I decide that it isn't important and ignore him. I tell him that. He thinks it is funny. No hard feelings. Dream feels lighthearted.

Fragment
I recall a muggy jungle with maybe some drizzle but not much else.

Potential Influencing Factors:
Exercise - 1 hour of walking.
Meditation - About 15 minutes of visualization.
Diet - Ate heavy meal at Panda Express.

Pre WBTB - Winter Neighborhood

There is some muggy jungle scene but I can't recall much else.

I'm at a neighborhood street in the winter time. It reminds me of one I used to run as part of a route in college. Unlike how I remember, there are homeless people struggling to stay warm all across the street. The group I'm with don't have anything to give them so we feel bad.

Post WBTB - Zoomin' Through Space and Fun at the Sand Shrine

I take the Yuschak primary trigger supplement combo and get back to bed within about 10 minutes after reviewing WILD entry techniques. I lay down for sometime and wait for the vibrations. They eventually come and are fairly intense. I feel two waves of them, but no images ever form. I eventually slip off into normal sleep.

I'm back at the same neighborhood but this time it is a warm summer scene with a thriving community. I'm living with some friends of S and I. Three couples. SP is sort of the mom of the group and we're following her. We are coming home from driving somewhere and get into the house. The inside reminds me of my Grandma M's house. Specifically the bar we sit down at is reminiscent. We start unloading bags and everybody gets something. I get a giant jelly candy brick. I get up to look around the house and use the bathroom. SP or one of the other girls nearly walks in on me while I'm using the toilet, but luckily I'm standing and facing away from the door. When I go back into the hallway, I do a nose reality check out of habit. I'm lucid now.

Since a house isn't the most exciting place in the world, I decide to go outside. I leave the front door and the green grass is super vivid. I decide I should stabilize, so I rub my barefeet on the grass and the dirt. I lick the dirt for good measure and rub my hands. I do a few more nose RCs just in case. Well, if that check failed I would have looked really stupid. Oh well. Good thing I can breathe through my nose. I decided I want to fly, so I took off superman style. I hit a set of tree branches above me like a total chump immediately but it didn't hurt too bad.


Flyin' high. Made with a combination of Bing and Nightcafe image generator AIs.

I rose up into the sky and enjoyed the view of the neighborhood. I wanted to go explore more, but the world started to zoom out. Oh shit. It feels like I'm moving super fast. The world zooms out so far that I'm now in space looking at Earth. I think about the Outer Wilds Travelers' Theme song and laugh while saying the first few notes of acoustic guitar out loud. Naturally, the song starts to play. Zooming through space with music.

Outer Wilds Travelers' Theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YR_wIb_n4ZU


The vacuum of space. Made with Nightcafe AI.

Into the universe I say "So, where are we goin'?" like Pippen at the council of Elrond from Lord of the Rings.

As if in answer, a pale blue cloudy planet comes into view on the space horizon. I remark that this definitely isn't earth. It doesn't have any green on it. At this point I'm just super happy I have been lucid this long. As I'm sent closer to the planet I confirm it isn't Earth. This is a desert planet.

My feet lithely (not a hint of my waking knee pain) land at the top of a shrine in a desert. There is a book with golden pages atop a pedestal. I see an attractive purple haired woman across the way near the top of the stairs leading down to the sand. She's wearing skimpy clothes, black leather with her chest showing. Her legwear isn't covering much either. No complaints. I get the sense that she is an experienced traveler, or she can guide me in some way.

"Woah! This place is so vivid!" I say.

"Yeah, it's pretty much always like that," she replies over the desert wind.

I start to follow her down the stairs and then try to pull her closer to me. She doesn't seem into it so I back off. We continue walking down the shrine area. I look at her clothes again.

Spoiler for Spicy Content:

"Soooo are you into bondage or something?" I ask.

"Well...yeah" she replies while turning a bit red.

I pin her to one of the nearby walls and start to make out with her. I slowly slip my finger behind her and down her lower back...and further.

"FUCK! I forgot how amazing this feels!" she says.


The purple-haired guide. Made with Nightcafe AI.

The dream gets unstable after that and I go into a false awakening. My body feels heavy. I try to rollover but still feel something like sleep paralysis. I have a few more false awakenings, but I eventually decide I really want to write down dreams, so I wiggle my toes and rollover. I wake up for real this time.

Supplements: Yuschak Primary Trigger Combination (3rd Attempt)
Galantamine: 8mg
Choline Bitartrate: 250mg

Default = Commentary
Blue = Dream
Dark Orange = Lucid

Really good things happened, I just wish I could've handled them better.

Following the WBTB was an amazing PR lucid, followed by a slightly depressing part that fell off. I was in an aiport with Ankha. She got me lucid, and was live action like before. We were really enthusiastic about our destination. Yet I firmly stated that the cult kept me from making guarantees. Near the end there was something that seriously upset her. Our flight was cancelled, I think and a person resembling Snape from Harry Potter was scolding us. Then, I had a nasty false awakening. I had great recall. Celebrating this intriguing lucid. I explained it to OmniLucid to many people and they praised me for it. I found a way to record that part of the lucid and shared it with them. Ankha’s mouth wasn’t open enough ever to see inside. The only. ONLY reason this ISNT a 10/10 is really sad recall for the actual lucid itself

LD 1-I woke up and saw I was not in my room, which made me lucid. I was in what appeared to be a classroom. I somehow went outside into the night in a downtown area and jumped up to fly. In front of me on a road I was a huge stack of block letters which appeared to say a message, something about a warning of terrible death. I woke up while trying to read the message.

LD 2-I woke up and saw I was not in my room, which made me lucid. I was in what appeared to be my room, except with a decoration on the wall that doesn't exist in waking life. I phased through the wall into the night in a neighborhood similar to where I live in waking life. I jumped up to fly and tried to summon a dolphin, but instead summoned a black creature, similar to a dragon without wings. I got on it's back to ride it. It flew down to the ground and started eating bugs. I asked what this is all about and he told me I had a skin infection. I asked where the skin infection was and he told me it was on my diploma and I woke up.

These dreams appear to be related to some health concerns I had in waking life. I have rashes on each of my shoulders which appear to be getting better, but I had some mild intermittent chest pain which had me a bit concerned, but appears to have go away overnight. Its probably time for a medical checkup with the doctor.

Up at about 4:30AM for a WBTB. No recall from earlier in the night. I've just taken the supplements below for the first time. I'll be back to record later. First impression: Choline smells terrible. Like fishy terrible.

Update: Laid in bed for a long time. GF's regular weekday alarm went off by mistake a couple times and messed up my rhythm. Eventually I relaxed enough to start feeling WILD vibrations. I got all the way through the process of "going through the wormhole", and I could see a dream in a tiny pinhole at the end. It was my childhood home. I could see my old PC monitor with Runescape on it, but the dream was black around the edges. I forgot that I needed to 'grab' the dream and I missed my opportunity.

I find myself in my bed and I think to do a nose RC. I can breathe through my nose so I know I'm dreaming. I start to rub my hands together, spin, and demand that the dream stabilize. It doesn't do much, and it feels very unstable and groggy. I try to leave my bedroom but the dream fades. I have a few more false awakenings with similar results. At one point I did spin and see some marked improvement in quality, but not enough to try and pursue a dream goal. I was trying to go to a forest and explore the dream environment.

I'm in something similar to a fast-food restaurant playscape. There is a pool resort nearby. Sunny day and all that. Looks like a dope vacation spot actually. I'm crawling through the tube tunnels, and eventually come out the other side. There is a group of people playing the upcoming Zelda title, Tears of the Kingdom, on an outdoor TV setup. It is lagging really bad. I'm upset about it being this bad. I wake or otherwise recall nothing beyond this point.

Regarding the supplements. I did notice a bit of a headache during the attempt (and now still), as well as some stomach discomfort. I felt my heart beating faster but that is most likely attributed to the WILD experience itself. Nothing earth-shattering but thought I should note it.

Hoping for better results next time. I will say that this is the first time in a long time that I've actually felt the WILD vibrations, tiny victories I guess.

Supplements: Primary Trigger Combination (1st Attempt)
Galantamine: 8mg
Choline Bitartrate: 250mg

Default = Commentary
Blue = Dream
Green = Lucid

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

At some victorian house, sort of half asleep and seeing the scenario fade away, but I realize it is actually a dream and that it is the dream itself that is fading. I hold on to it, but the darkness doesn't go away and I know this is when sometimes the monsters come up. And then I see a woman coming over and whenever she crosses a more shadowy area, her face becomes monstruous. I warn a friend that is also sleeping nearby to wake up. She doesn't know what I am talking about and she looks at the woman. The woman says in a hypnotic tone "look into my eyes". I grab my friend and say "don't look, it will kill you". I get in front of the woman and I say assertively "Now, you look into my eyes!" at the side of her face that is not disfigured. She looks puzzled and loses a bit of her power temporarily, so I open some curtains to let light in and I drag my friend to the outside. The woman still tries to reach me, but she can't stand the light. I decide to lift off and that's when I go fully lucid. I don't know what to do, so I decide to just watch the dream. Below me it now looks like some big american city. I also see a huge roller-coaster in the distance. There is some retro vibe to it. I just amuse myself by flying over people and watching their dramas. I feel very melancholic thinking how all these people are just DCs. I sing and dance in the sky above them.

Visiting my mom at her old job at the Union. They are at some warehouse with piles of boxes with files and lots of stickers, calendars and other stuff I used to steal from them and collect as a child. I am mesmerized by all the retro things they have, not fully aware that I am dreaming, but aware I am seeing something gone from the past. I grab a box with some stickers to take with me as mementos. For some reason my dog Hachi appears and all is fine until someone else also comes in with 2 dogs and a baby. I grab Hachi immediately and try to take him somewhere where I can keep him isolated. Unfortunately there is only a small room with no windows and I don't want to lock him there. So when the other dogs follow us and we get cornered there, I close them inside instead and take Hachi away.
We go to my mom's and he roams around the house free. After a while I am looking for him and find him in the balcony injured with a bad open wound in his front right leg. Nearby is a robotic snake I keep as a toy, also severely "hurt". Turns out she can bite and it is a powerful metallic bite. I try getting close to him, but he cowers and hides his leg. I go get hydrogen peroxide and throw copious amounts on his wound. He ends up accepting my treatment and even puts his front legs over mine to thank me, I guess. Then I also want to help the snake but need something to grab it safely. I didn't know she had such a dangerous self defense mechanism.

At my childhood home, alone, and I become lucid. I go into my room, honestly just wanting again to dwell on the melancholic feeling of seeing things from my past. But then I feel crazy horny and feel the urge to remove my pants. I look around for objects I might use creatively, but all I see is a wooden spoon over the bed for no good reason. So I give up on objects. Instead I decide to experiment what it would feel like if my clitoris grew to become a very long penis. Long enough that it reaches my mouth. And then I suck it. I almost wake up with the sensation but I manage to come back to the dream. Then I jump scare when through the balcony door I see 3 Rinpoches sitting outside. They are not looking at me, they are to right side, almost out of sight. I can only see a bit of their faces but I recognize them ckearly. They are facing forward as if listening or watching someone to my left side. I pull my pants up quickly, deeply embarassed, hoping they didn't see that. I get up and walk slowly towards the balcony sliding doors. Then they turn their heads towards me and nod at me wtth a smile. As I approach, I see many more of them and recognize almost all of them. Then some more pass by from my left side and disappear behind the ones sitting. The balcony is no longer a balcony, but some room somewhere else. They all aknowledge my presence, nod and smile, but none says a word. Then I walk forward a few more steps and I see my teacher to my left. He is standing there and he is the one all others were looking at or listening. They hint that I should come in and I do. Rinpoche comes to me and we immediately hug. Then we kiss. It is a shy confused kiss, because I want to kiss him on the lips but I am not sure if it is ok, so I kinda go for the cheek but still touch his lips. He seems surprised but pleased. We continue hugging. Then he kisses me on the lips properly. It feels incredible and totally real. We continue hugging tight and saying how much we missed each other, while I caress his back and head. I can even feel the smooth edges of his robe on his back and do my autistic thing of stimming by feeling the calming texture of the seam.
Then he moves on and we are in some kind of library or classroom and I realize we need to get out because a class or lecture is about to start. Lucidity fades a bit from here. Outside he is with his entourage and they are heading to some place to lunch with, but he specifically says to his attendant that I am to have lunch with the more private group and sit by his side in the upper room. The restaurant is asian, but I can't tell from which country. Rinpoche and the private group disappear upstairs as I am distracted looking at the food they have on display. Then I am not allowed to come up. When finally that is cleared up, I arrive there, but Rinpoche has disappeared again, maybe to go to the bathroom or something, I think. The people there look me sideways and want me to sit me at the "kids" table. I see three empty seats and figure that's where Rinpoche will sit so I say I think I am supposed to sit there to, but they mock me and bully me. Some lady is being incredibly rude and gets into my nerves, so I bang my hand on the table, wanting to punch her, and say "one of these seats is for me, just wait and see". But I feel bad for my ego outburst, so I just go and sit at a bench near the window, at the far end of the table, but where Rinpoche can see me when he returns. Then we hear his voice on loud speakers, interviewing some indian fella and it is about Russia and some allegory with volcanos and people wonder what is this about.