false awakening

had a long confusing dream. the part that stood out featured me as an active spectator, i was in a building like a 40ft container a woman was inside it was like unto a restaraunt with a few customers. however that woman was marked for death as 2 people approached her with long blades like swords. one of the 2 (1 male 1 female) cut her head off then the other chopped her entire right arm off at the neck that chopped also took out the entire rib cage of that section. to my surprise this ladies chest cavity was stuffed with federal reserve notes of all denominations, her entire right side that got chopped off was in the shape of a right triangle and it had federal notes in it as well. however i and the 2 attackers started removing the notes from her chest cavity, at this point her head was back on and she was ALIVE! when she saw that we were taking all the notes she rolled over to stop us from taking all of it and she started crying and told us that we couldnt take all the notes because she was pregnant and needed some, at this point i beheld her stomach and sure enough she was pregnant. i got really concerned and wanted to cut her tummy and remove the baby but she protested and told me that she wanted the baby to come out of her vagina. so at this point i along with the other 2 assassins ran outside to find someone to help deliver the child, a man driving an old bedford truck stopped and we told him about the baby. u wouldnt guess wat his idea of delivering a baby was... well he alighted from the vehicle and told me to help him catch a small car off the road (with our bare hands mind u my hand was already in a grabbing position too) we caught a vw i think driven by an old lady (so u know this car was crawling) it looks like i woke in the dream from the moment the attack took place. we flip the car over unto the back of the bedford truck on its top and then the dream trailed off elsewhere. weird right?

I am returning from a business trip. I have been away for quite some time, and am ready to be intimate with my wife. She is on the phone with her sister, and the door is shut. She finally emerges, and I tell her I would like to have a talk. We go into the bedroom together.

My wife then makes an odd comment. "Men are really just a pile of sex cells, so I think you just need a good fuck."

In dream, this actually sounds kind of good, and we start getting into bed (the bedroom, of course, is not our bedroom, and my wife doesn't even look like herself--but why should that seem weird at all? ). But then I realize, no, I would like to just talk and spend time with my wife. For some reason now I open up the drawer next to the bed, and find a pistol in the drawer. We do not own a pistol, and so I demand to know why there is a gun in the house.

My wife gets defensive. "You were gone for so long!" she says. "I needed some way to protect myself!"

My dream thinking then comes to this conclusion: some man has purchased this gun for my wife, and she has been having an affair. "Who bought you this gun?" I shout.

I then glance at the sliding glass door, and see a man standing there, and it hits me: this is her lover, looking in on us. I am really pissed, and jump up to confront him. At this point, a mob forms outside. The neighbors begin chasing this guy, and he runs off. One of them, an older man, beckons to me through the glass, and I think, Alright, let's get this motherfucker! A group of the neighbors drag my wife out of the house but I am running after her lover now.

While I am running, I notice that some of the neighbors are people I know from high school. Am I dreaming? I wonder, as people from high school are a dreamsign for me, but the dream plot is so demanding and fast-paced that I quickly forget about state checking and continue pursuit.

The neighbors have now cornered the man near a dumpster (and I think he may have even been in the dumpster). My first thought now is of the pistol--where is that gun, so I can shoot this asshole? I realize that I left it back at the house, though. Turns out there is now a baseball bat in my hand. It's long and black and purple, and looks like a nerf bat. It's heavy and solid, though, and I think that I could easily kill someone with it. I heft it and prepare to hit my wife's lover, who is on the ground in front of me.

Then I suddenly realize I don't need to do this. There isn't any good reason to kill this man. I back off, and feel a bit better. We then become friends in the dream (though my memory is a little fuzzy here). Once I've decided to not act in violence, the crowd begins to disperse. Soon I am by myself, walking back through the neigborhood. At this point it strikes me--oh yeah, I wanted to test reality. And of course, I am dreaming.

I am a little annoyed, because I realize I've spent a good bit of dream time on "dream drama," and not doing things that are constructive or fun. It's nighttime, and I decide to fly through the neighborhood a bit. I lift off of the ground easily, but begin to have some hangups. I instinctively revert to the swim method, but when it doesn't immediately succeed, I just hang there in midair, remember that I'm not doing the swim schema anymore, and reassert my intention of flight. I begin to fly normally, without dream body movement.

I then realize I am slowing down, but I think to myself, no, I'm flying fast, and then I am flying fast. The wind is whipping past my face and it feels really wonderful. All around me though, the dream is beginning to get blurry, and the darkness is increasing.

In the past, I have associated dream darkness with waking up, and so assume the dream is ending (as it had gone on for quite a bit already). However, I still attempt some stability techniques. I shout, "Increase lucidity!" and some sharpness and clarity does return momentarily, but then begins to fade again. At this point, the dream scene is retreating away from me at top speed, and I am stuck in some kind of dark tunnel vision. My thought at this moment (unfortunately) is "I've got to try to get back to the dream scene" and I leap forward with all I've got.


I slam into the bedside table at my old apartment complex, breaking the lamp in the process. Glass is everywhere and I assume that I have broken REM atonia and moved in my sleep (which is unfortunately something I tend to do). As I am cleaning up the glass, I hear my wife cooking in the next room, as well as Frank Sinatra singing from the stereo. I then receive a false memory of Frank singing all night. I wake up shortly after.

Side notes: The "Loony Tunes Retreating Dream Scene" is something that has happened before, and something I plan to recognize as a false awakening the next time it occurs.

I had a short lucid. A tiny one. All I remember is pinching my nose, the RC worked and I was lucid! I went outside (from somewhere) and before I could do anything I felt myself waking up. I tried to fight it, to stay in the dream, but I lost lucidity. Not sure if I actually woke up or if it was a FA.

1. I was inside of some very large house. Inside of it, the interior was quite relaxing. The floor was made of wooden panels, and the walls were painted white. All around me there were fancy decorations. This house, or whatever it was, had many rooms as well, and the whole design of everything gave a very open feeling to whoever was in it. I started walking around casually, just doing my own thing. There were other people here as well, most of them adults, and they too were just walking around looking at things.
I came to the dining table, which was in the middle of this vast home. It was a smooth creamy brown in color, and looked as though it could seat 18 people. 8 people on each side, and 1 person on each end. I kept on walking and soon found myself near the basement of this house(not sure what it was, but I'm assuming it was a basement). Suddenly the atmosphere around me got darker, and so did my vision in a sense. Everything got really quiet, but it was more of an uncomfortable, creepy, quiet. I crouched down and stopped to listen for a second. I couldn't hear anything, it was dead quiet.
I turned a corner and looked down what I thought was an abandoned hallway, and as I did, I saw some guy that looked pretty evil. I took a second glance to see him better, and it was a Reaper. It had the hood on, the robes, and everything, except it looked as real as real could be. This reaper was just standing there, motionless, and didn't make a single noise. Next to him, there were alot of boxes filled with really cool stuff, or at least, what I thought was cool when I was in the dream. I saw things such as wire cutters, and there were alot of boxes like those. I remember reading off of one box in particular, the words "200x wire cutter".
I kept my eyes on that box, and slowly dragged it towards me. The reaper spoke, "I'm going to have to kill you for that". He started moving slowly towards me, maybe moving at the speed of 1 inch per second. I looked around and saw another box that interested me, I don't remember what it was though. I took this box as well, and this made the Reaper mad. "Thank you, now I can walk at full speed". With this, he started walking really fast towards me. I grabbed the stuff I had just stolen and started fast walking away, I didn't want to start a scene.
Suddenly, the Reaper shape-shifted into a random guy. He did this multiple times, and now I could not tell who he was. I quickly pulled out my phone, but as I did, I dropped it onto the floor. I picked it up and scrolled through my phone, looking for a certain application that would allow me to see who the Reaper had shape-shifted into. As I opened the app, it activated my phone's front camera. I aimed the camera behind me and the camera recognized the Reaper and made his entire body glow orange on the camera screen. I now knew who the Reaper was.
I remember walking past the diner table and almost tripping. The Reaper continued fast walking towards me, but I could easily out run him if I wanted to. I don't remember anything else of this dream.

2. I was somewhere outside, next to a warehouse with my friends. We were all inside of a small, compact red car, and my friend Trey was driving us. We parked next to this warehouse and Trey got out to do something. I got out of the passenger seat in the back, as I was sitting in the back left seat. Once I got out of the car, I decided that I wanted to drive, so I got in the driver seat. I remember putting my foot on the brake pedal just to get the feel of it, and both the brake pedal and the accelerator were extremely close to me.
My legs were bent at more than a 45 degree angle and I felt really crowded and smushed, I ad barely any room to move. Only a minute after I got in the driver seat, my friend Trey came back and told me to get out. I got out and went back to my seat, but to my surprise, Trey wasn't driving this time, my other friend Patrick was. Patrick got in the driver seat and once we were all ready to go, he took a left into the parking lot directly to the left of us.
After only a few seconds of driving into one of the parking lot rows, Patrick stopped. I was wondering why he had stopped, and I looked to our left and saw a middle-aged lady and her son and daughter. As the lady passed in front of our car to get to the right side of the parking lot row, patrick rolled down his window and said, "Hey look, it's Matthew's mom!". She was passing the driver window as he said this, and she gave us a weird look. We all watched her to see which car she got in. When she arrived next to her car, I saw Matthew Vasquez and thought, "Wow, Patrick was right, that was Matthew's mom". I watched as Matthew opened the passenger seat door and got in. His little sister got in the back seat.
As Matthew's mom and everyone else got into the car Patrick said, "Dude guys, holy crap we're going to be late! It's going to take us 30 minutes to get there!". I'm not sure what he was talking about, but I'm assuming he meant 30 minutes until we would arrive at school. He started driving again, and I remember looking out the window and seeing the partly cloudy blue sky. It was bright outside, and I felt very relaxed.

3. I was in SkyZone, an indoor trampoline place. I was on an orange trampoline, and there were 3 other orange trampolines around me. I remember the one I was jumping on was very narrow and small. The trampoline was about 10 feet in the air, I'm assuming supported by stilts or something. I started jumping and felt really uncomfortable because of the size of the trampoline, I thought I was going to fall off. There was an employee standing next to me on my right, and he kept telling me, "Don't worry about it. Just keep jumping, you're not going to fall". I didn't trust myself.
I looked to my left, and standing on the ground was my dad, cheering me on. I decided that I had nothing to loose and I started jumping. At first, I didn't get much air because I was jumping on the side of the trampoline, where it doesn't produce as much lift, but eventually I moved to the middle of it and started gaining alot of air. I jumped like this for a minute or so. I found out that this trampoline that I was jumping on, was the beginning of an obstacle course.
The employee next to me told me to move on towards the next obstacle. I found myself jumping towards a platform that was about 30 feet in the air, and I had to jump really high to land on it. The platform was really small, and it was yellow in color and was outlined in red. Another employee was waiting for me and cheering me on on top of the platform. I got another good look at it, and found out that it was slanted at about 45 degrees. How was I supposed to make this without falling. The employee on the platform yelled out to me, "Come on, you can do it! When you get up here, grab on to the two yellow handles".
I finally got enough air and made a final big jump on the trampoline I was on. I lifted off into the air like a bird and found myself landing perfectly on the platform. I quickly grabbed onto the two yellow handles that I was supposed to. What the employee didn't tell me, was that when you landed on the platform, it starts to shake violently- and I mean violently. I struggled to hold on, it was like I was riding some sort of electric bull ride. I kept a tight grip however, and soon the platform stopped shaking as much as it did.
The employee with me on the platform told me to climb up and jump into the slide next to me, which was still 30 feet in the air. I climbed on top of the platform and gained my balance. I thought about what I was going to do next, jumping into a slide seemed pretty intense, especially since the slide was shaking even more violently than the platform. It was even twirling around and doing 360's. I waited for the right moment, and then I jumped towards the slide. I fell in through the entrance of the slide, and started sliding down.
I found myself tumbling and slamming into the walls of the slide, considering the fact that it was still twirling and such. Luckily, the slide walls were soft because the slide itself was inflated just like how jump houses are. I flipped over and rolled inside of the slide for a few more seconds, and finally I made it to the bottom and got out. I looked around and noticed that I had finished the obstacle course and was now on the ground, standing on a soft but firm black mat. I looked in front of me and saw my dad and greeted him.

4. I was inside of a school. I was walking down a hallway, and everything seemed pretty normal. Students all around me walked to wherever they were going, and I did the same. I looked around me and saw yellows walls around inside this school, it felt very new. As I was walking to my class, I saw my old teacher from my freshman year, Mr. Molitoriss. He looked exactly the same as did 2 years ago, except for the fact that he had long hair now that reached his shoulders.
As a group of students in front of me neared him, they greeted him. "Hey Mr. Molitoriss!", they said. He greeted them all back. Eventually I passed Mr Molitoriss, and as I did, I too greeted him, "Hey Mr. Molitoriss!". "I'm sorry, but I don't remember you", he told me(which is weird because we were really chill when I was in his class). This cut me deep inside, and I felt very embarrassed. I continued walking down that same hall to get to my class, it was the last class at the end of this hallway and was on the left. When I made it into class, I went to my seat and sat down.
As I did so, I looked on my desk and saw a piece of manila paper that had been folded many times. The paper was about some project that we were starting in the class, and written on it were 3 names. One of the names on it was "Jenny". When I read that name I remember thinking to myself, "Wow, now I'll finally get to talk to her, it might be a little awkward though". I had wanted to talk to this girl before somewhere, but not sure why. One of the other names was "Brad", and as for the last name, I don't remember it. Each one of these names was written in a different color in crayola, and I remember that "Jenny" was written in red crayola.
I continued reading the paper, and below those 3 names was the word "Lunch" written in a bright yellow orange crayon, and it was a little sloppy. Suddenly, the teacher came into our class, it was Mr. Molitoriss. I decided to forget what had happened back in the hallway, and view him as a new teacher and start fresh. He began talking about the project and basically elaborated and explained it in greater detail.
Later on after class, I remember sitting on a bench against a wall in the main hallway, right next to the hallway where my class was. My mom was sitting next to me. Now, the atmosphere in this school seemed rather dark. It looked as though all of the lights were off in the school, but they weren't. Around me I could still see alot of students minding their own business, and going on their way to their classes. Right now everything was really busy.
I looked far ahead in front of me and saw a system of stairs, set up in a spiral. Many students were ascending and descending through it. Out of no where, a whole group of choir students walked right in front of me. My mom got up and followed them, so I got up and followed them as well. They were all wearing dark green outfits that closely resembled graduation outfits in their style. As we followed them, they walked into a room not far from where we were sitting, and the room was very long in length. Inside, the floor was covered in a gray carpet, and on the left and right walls, lockers covered the entire surface.
I told my mom that we really had no reason to be in here, and that we should leave right now. With that, we both left the room.

5. I was banging some black chick, and started eating her out. She tasted kind of weird so I wanted to stop, but I kept going anyway. (fragment)

6. I was in a big school cafeteria and the lights were off. It was almost completely empty inside except for me, my mom, and my dad, and a few other people. Me and my parents were sitting by a couple of vending machines. My mom got up and bought a few slim jims out of the machine and gave me some. She had bought four of them so she gave me 2. I opened the sticks up and started eating them. The taste was really vivid, and I remember feeling the juiciness of the Slim Jim's themselves when I bit into them.
My dad had brought over another bigger piece of beef jerky, but it wasn't a stick. It was about an inch in width and about 6 inches in length. I asked my dad if I could look at it for a second, and he handed it to me. I looked at the beef jerky, it looked pretty normal. I turned it around and looked at the Nutrients section. I remember specifically checking out the sodium level in it, and it had 990 mg of sodium. This shocked me. 990 mg of sodium in this small of a stick of beef jerky? It didn't make sense.
My mom got some kind of candy from the vending machines as well. I don't remember anything else after this.

7. I was just chilling in my room, and my lights were off. I was only wearing my boxers and was making my bed. My bed was on my right wall as soon as you walk into my room(its usually in the middle of my room). As I was making my bed I heard my sister open my door behind me. I looked at her and saw that she had barely cracked open the door and she was staring at me. I got really mad and told her to go away and that she was really annoying.
She asked why and started explaining about how she didn't do anything. I was so mad that I didn't even care, and just wanted her to go away. After she went away, I closed my door shut completely and laid down on my bed. I was still half naked, and I just continued chilling.

8. I was downstairs in what seemed like my house. I was with my friends Dylan and Trey, and an 8th grader that lives down the block from me was also with us. For some reason, my restroom downstairs was now located right next to the dining table and I was about to go inside. I looked at Jack and noticed that he had a can of blue spray in his hands. I thought nothing of this at the moment.
Not a minute after I decided to ignore him, he came behind me and sprayed the blue spray on the back of my hair. I got really pissed and called him a mother F*****. I was really mad. Jack then when into the restroom next to us. I too went into the exact same restroom and Dylan followed me. It was really nice inside, and the floor was made of smooth tan tiles, and the walls matched them. On each side of the restroom, there was a shower. Each shower was about 6 yards in length and had a white shower curtain covering it.
As I entered this restroom, I went to the sink and started brushing my teeth. As I was doing so I heard the sound of water running. I stopped and listened for a second and realized that Jack was taking a shower in the shower directly to the right of me. I found this a little weird, but kept brushing my teeth anyway. Suddenly my mouth started feeling extremely dry, and I was having trouble swallowing. The dream then ended and I woke up and found that I had been sleeping with my mouth open and that my mouth was painfully dry. It even hurt to swallow.

8/19/2014

2300-0700

1. I was in my room with a girl. She was pretty hot. I had hot sex with her for quite a while. It was pretty vivid. It was with someone who looked like L, but she had lighter skin.

2. I remember being in my bed, masturbating. Pretty much a false awakening, where I didn't wake and instead just masturbated and went to sleep.

23:18 pre-bedtime 3mg melatonin
00:00 Monday 2014-08-18

04:00 alarm, 2 x 4mg Galantamind, 1x 300mg Choline Bitartrate, 1x 300mg Alpha-GPC, 1 large rye cracker, 1 banana, immediately back to bed

(no recall, just vague impressions, not even fragments)

05:00 still awake

05-06? very stimulated, familiar body buzzing feeling on G + Ch, difficult to get mind to stay at rest, "relieve tension," BTB

fall asleep somewhere around late 05? or perhaps 06?

06??

+ I'm lucid sitting on a bus, feel unstable, turn around to my right and see a guy sitting in the seat behind me smoking, I grab a strap that runs vertically along his body with my right hand and hold it firmly and say to him, "NO SMOKING ON THE BUS!!". I'd like to stabilize and get deeper into the dream but I can't take my right hand away (like if I did the dream would end) and I can't reach the right hand with my left. I lose visuals and I'm holding both hands on the bar on top of the seat in front of me. The bus starts pitching up and down violently like a ship in tall ocean waves, I feel the bus pitch down sharply and my body lifts up off the seat, still holding on to the bar in front of me, I wonder if the bus is going to start flying into space.

Transition: I'm now a DO flying above behind and to the right of a bus that's driving on a road. The world is a flat-shaded cartoon world: a lot is white, and it's very blocky. The bus turns left at an intersection and them pulls over to a building and stops. I call out "Hey are there any cartoon girls in there?" I see a little guy get off the bus and head in to the building, I follow him and call to him "are you going to show me your cartoon <ahem>?"

+ In a house, in front of a mirror, I pick up an electric toothbrush and turn it on. The sensation in my hand gives me an idea and I place the fairly strongly vibrating toothbrush in a NSFW way in several different positions looking for the best sensation.

+ (I may have been walking through my kitchen at one point). I have a shirt with a large red food stain on it, I feel generally kind of nervous/edgy. I'm outside my kitchen (on a patio?) looking down at my shirt every once in a while, when my friend MR appears in my kitchen looks at me picks something up in his hand and says "Hey <my name> why aren't you eating these pancakes?" I'm thinking those pancakes were cooked some while ago and may not be very clean. He takes a bite and says "pancakes are great for digging out cavities!"

+ colleague JT is holding a joint press statement with the police, they've found his kidnapped son after a long search, he's calling for leniency on the kidnapper -- his wife is hot and busty I see her topless with her arms over her head, get lucid, and enjoy the view and perhaps think about leaning in for some contact for a few seconds before waking up.

+ I'm standing in a hallway (feels like a house) and am immediately lucid. At the lucidity I notice the walls change from uncolored to colored in a modern color scheme: muted warm colored rectangles, smoky translucent glass arranged in patterns. I turn to my left and walk ahead slightly, my attention drawn by incredible colors and patterns. On a (bed?) in a room there I see a pile of cube-shaped pillows (about 4-6 inches on a side) that have a mixture of many different colors in various patterns (mostly straight/triangular lines). I'm astonished at the vivid colors and look at the scene for a few moment to make sure I can remember it. I remember TOTM basic (I) (foreign word) and turn back to where I started expecting to find some people. Just ahead I see the hallway open into a large open area and DCs are mulling around there. I walk up to one and try to say "tell me a foreign word and what it means," but I can barely open my mouth and can barely make any sound. I try again with another DC and the sounds are severely muted like trying to talk under water, the DC just walks away, I try once more and the DC looks at me with a quizzical "say that again?" look, and I slow down and try to speak very clearly. I think it comes out better and the DC answers something like "fribblety-splat". I repeat it back to make sure I heard it correctly. Then I ask her what it means, and she answers "the kakashka is in the F. U." Despite the success I go on to ask a few more DCs in the area and now I can speak clearly and freely. I'm eyeing some DC girls as they walk by, like one, then pick another (long curly blonde hair),

Spoiler for NSFW explicit:

and plan an encounter that calls for her to sit down. I look and see a counter with chairs that might work and I maneuver her there and sit her down and turn to face her. I pull my pants down (with some difficulty) and reach for her head, she's pulled away some, I do a jedi mind trick ("it's my dream you have to do what I want to") and she leans forwards, and right before the magical moment

I wake up.

08:15?
awake, recalling dreams, trying to get BTB, jerks are playing loud music outside somewhere

09:10 ? receive phone call, stand up answer it

Back to bed. I'm quite awake. Should I just get up for the day? NO! I feel I have at least one more LD in me and I'm probably still on the fumes from the G. Boy, I'm awake. OK, if you want it, you have to work for it. You've worked for this, you know what to do, DO IT!

So I do counting breathing up to about 50, that's not helping much, the counting is keeping me too aware. Do my classic sleep kung-fu: on every exhale, sink deeper into relaxation, let EVERYTHING go: mental, physical tension, on EVERY breath, let more and more go, let everything go! And in a short while .... I sleep!

+ I'm lucid in super crowded indoor space like a bookstore. I don't remember anything before this moment of lucidity. YES made it, 4th LD!, Start to to stabilize by rubbing my hands, hey, ... why not rub that cute girl's butt instead? I reach for her butt but she somehow knows what I'm doing and scoots off away from me really fast, I decide not to chase, I think it's pretty funny! Wow this is crowded, mostly young people, cute girls, push past them through a doorway and turn to the left. OK, NOW it's time for a girl! Wait...no, stabilize! I stop and rub my hands, and pound my chest with my fists a few times. At the pounding a DC who was sitting down next to me is startled, and gets down on the ground and scuttles/runs away like an insect. She was wearing a dark/black burka, like a muslim. I thought that was sort of funny/weird. Ah ha, I want to carry a bottle of water with me to stabilize! I think I'm holding a bottle of water and look down at my hands. WOW TRIPPY, my hands and parts of my arms to the wrist are not fully rendered yet by my brain, it looks like I'm wearing black translucent long gloves with bright lines circling all over and sparkles all over them, then I see the "paint" of my skin color creep quickly into my hands. Looks like a computer graphics effect! I'm now holding an empty bottle of water. I will for it to be filled with water. Wait a minute, no, Beer! Be filled with Beer! I see it fill with liquid. I upend the bottle to take a drink with my head back and my mouth open, and a few modest sized splashes of water (darn didn't get beer) hit my tongue and the roof of my mouth at the back of my mouth, the sensation is entirely realistic. I move the water bottle to my left hand. I remember my goal of chewing dream gum to stabilize and stay in the dream, I reach my right hand into my right pants pocket expecting to get some gum there, I feel a lot of coins and something like a wrapper, I bring my hand out and see some coins and an empty wrapper, ah well. I walk forwards (back the way I came) and people are still everywhere, I see a petite girl sitting in a chair

Spoiler for NSFW explicit:

and tell her to "show me your tits." I'm prepared to jedi mind trick her but she complies and starts taking off her top. I'm standing there watching and taking a drink from the water. I think this is taking too long. She gets her top off and I see her skin she's wearing a bra. I get quite excited, she starts taking off the bra and I

I wake up. I'm quite pleased that I got in my 4th lucid in one night, I'm really happy about this. I'm in a hallway in a large area and I look up and see a big analog clock and see that it shows 11 o'clock, wow I've slept quite late! Then I get a dream transition feeling and think "Hey maybe I can DEILD back in!", but I feel more awake, now I'm in bed, really awake, and realize I just missed a FA/transition to non-lucid, ARGH!

10:20 now really awake

non-lucid, lucid, false awakening

.../I see a group of drunk people gathering in a park, one of them is going to help a porcupine to get rid off some spines it has nailed in its body. I go to my house which now it's a cabin and it's a mess inside. It's night and I walk to the kitchen. The whole house is lit by the street lighting that gets through the windows. I find a door in a strange position on the upper corner of its doorframe. I think it has happened again. I use telekinesis to rotate it in the right position. I go to do something in the living room, when I come back to the kitchen, I find the door is back in its strange position. Once again I'm going to use telekinesis when I realize it must be a dream. I'm exited to do it again. I rise my hand and command the door to move back to it's normal position. I got to do it with some difficulty. Now I turn and go to the living room, feeling exited. I want to do something else. The first thing that pop in my mind, flying! I'm not outside the cabin, but I think I can do something here inside, thinking it's all about confidence. I see the shadows of the room, and I jump face down on them to start the flight. I think I may fly inside the house. But in stead, I don't even crash to the floor, on the contrary it's like diving into the void. I'm fascinated with the experience, I turn surrounded by darkness to slightly fall on my bed. It's on the room of the cabin, I open my eyes completely amazed by the previous flight into darkness, and realize I haven't change my outerwear for something more comfortable, I have even my shoes on! I feel to tired to stand up, so I try to take my clothes out on the bed. It's getting complicated to do so. I give up, and start thinking in my previous experience. I have to take note of this before I forget about it while slowly I start to feel the transition.

* And I wake up for real in the same position on my bed noticing it was the end of my first sleep cycle of the night

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #231: Fedoras and Flatulence

I wake up feeling disappointed that I didn’t manage to have a lucid dream. Well, too late for that -- Wife and the kids are up and getting ready and my folks are here too. I feel grumpy and sorry for myself, but I get started with the day. Lots of mundane stuff happens and eventually we all wind up sitting at a cafeteria table across from a pedestal.

The pedestal fascinates me. It has the vague outline of a statue on it, which will fade from looking fully physical to almost completely invisible. It’s a statue of Artemis, and I know that nobody can see it but me because I’m the only lucid dreamer in this whole place. As I’m staring at this statue, a brown-haired woman in her early 20s sits down in the chair next to me, a little closer than appropriate. She touches me on the shoulder flirtatiously and leans in. “Hi! What are we looking at?”

I feel uneasy about how close she’s getting but also attracted and flattered. I feel like I don’t know how much information I should reveal about being a lucid dreamer, so my answer is guarded: “That’s supposed to be a statue there.”

“Well, what do you see?” she asks.

The truth: “It’s a statue of Artemis. I can see it because I’m a lucid dreamer.”

“That’s amazing!” she says. She makes a few more comments about lucid dreaming and then stands up. Her inner thigh brushes my left hand as she gets up and I again get that mix of attraction and discomfort. She smiles. “You should call me if you ever want to talk to me about it.”

I think that I’d have no way to call her because I don’t have her phone number. I’m about to ask her what it is but stop when I realize how bad that would sound. This all feels strange to me now. I look to my right and my family isn’t here with me. It’s just me. I take the nose pinch reality check and I blow right through, becoming semi-lucid but just not completely convinced. .This feels so real, am I sure? I hit a second nose pinch and now I’m fully lucid.

I get up from the table and move into an adjacent room, remembering my intent to summon Dreamer. My go-to method has been transforming an existing DC into her, so I look around at the few dream characters wandering this scene and confidently grab the nearest one. It’s a short, pudgy Asian male, overall a really abysmal candidate for this transform into Dreamer. I want to be confident though so I go right ahead with trying to transform this dude.

I press my hands along his scalp, spreading Dreamer’s purple hair color along his scalp. He’s smiling and kind of chuckling at this, seeming to find it funny. The purple is coming out but whatever paint is coming out of my hands feels really clump and uneven. The guy’s scalp is kind of sweaty, too, and the purple paint even starts running down his face. His hair isn’t even half purpled before I get frustrated after a long time trying. Okay, maybe he looks too different, try changing the face. I start mashing on his face with my hands, trying to change his look into Dreamer. He seems to be getting kind of pissed at me for this and the whole thing just becomes awkward.

Okay, move on. I leave and walk into another room with a strange, gently wavy floor. I try the behind-the-back summon, narrating that “I feel Dreamer’s hand over here,” but I feel this doubt like I’m not doing things properly. I call out “[Dreamer]!” (using her real name) and vaguely hear a response, and I decide that she must be up ahead in some nearby room. I decide to use my old trick of demanding that the dream show me the way, and now when I call for Dreamer, a doorway glows with bright yellow light.

I continue moving through another series of 3-4 doors this way, demanding to be shown the way and the dream complying. I wind up in a large, cavernous room filled with DCs. There is a group of nuns near one side of the room that are dressed in unusual red habits. A large number of adults wander the room (more women than men) and close to the center of the room there’s a shallow pit where a large group of children are playing together. I ask the dream to show me where Dreamer is, but the glow effect always seems to be slightly out of view, frustrating me. I demand out loud that “Everybody point to where [Dreamer] is in this room.”

Every character in the scene turns toward a young, blond girl that’s playing in the pit. She’s about 6, her hair much shorter and lighter than I would have imagined, but I feel like this is her. I walk up to the child, who looks up at me with a goofy, slightly crooked-toothed smile. I place my hands on the sides of her head and say, “This is you, you’re [Dreamer].” As I say this, she grows to full height and now she looks completely like herself, apart from the fact that she has the little girl’s short, blond hair.

“Thank you for finding me!” she says. Dreamer puts her arms around my neck and we briefly hug. Almost immediately, all of the DCs in the room move toward, all of them smiling at her, greeting her, and wanting to interact with her. Some of them congratulate her. I stand by a few feet to the side, interested and amused. As each of the DCs greet her in turn, at one point a man comes up with a tiny fedora and placed it onto her head as if he’s crowning her.

The happy throng of DCs congregate around Dreamer as they all walk toward one of the room’s exits. I feel sad to see her leave the dream scene so early but all of this feels very natural to me, so I don’t resist it.

Once I find myself alone, I walk through another exit into an office scene with lots of people working at desks. It looks like we’re high up in a skyscraper. I make some mischief in here with telekinesis, throwing a plastic sign, tossing a desk, picking up one poor guy who’s just trying to get his work done. The office workers start seeming uncomfortable with my presence, so I look for an exit.

Off to the side is a platform with a waiting helicopter, so I climb aboard. Another DC tries to get on with us, and there’s a brief argument about who should get to come aboard. The pilot says (referring to me) “He can do whatever he wants,” and we take off. We fly over the city for a good while and I spy a few buildings that look reminiscent from spots in Breaking Bad. Eventually the helicopter hovers over a forest clearing near a building and I jump out. The helicopter flies off and I’m alone again.

I remember that I have a lucid dare from Dreamer that requires me to perform a Super Advanced Fart (one which is “very long, loud, and powerful”). At first I feel like this will be impossible. My body isn’t giving me “the signal” that anything can be conjured up. I know that this is a dream, though, so I convince myself that a bubble of pressure is forming in my stomach. Once that’s there, a good push sends me into a full eruption. The emerging fart is ultra loud and super powerful, lifting me gently into the air. It feels like there’s a hand or a platform under my butt lifting me upward. I wobble around unsteadily in the air, leaning left and right and bobbing a bit. It feels like I have a jet pack on.

I’d hoped to have enough propulsion to reach lower earth orbit, but I never get more than 15-20 feet off the ground. As the “event” ends, I settle back down to the ground. Dare achieved!

I’ve still got some dream left, so I decide to find Dreamer again. I ask the dream to show me where she is, and a door glows on a nearby building. I head for the door but before I reach it, I have a false awakening at the foot of a bed. Wife is lying on the bed, completely unclothed, writing on a notepad. I feel extreme sexual attraction and I curl up next to her. The moment that I kiss her neck, though, her clothes reappear. Then she shows me that she’s making a list of personality quirks that makes her good at Jeopardy questions. I’m still trying to figure out how to turn things frisky when my dad walks by on the way to the kitchen. The mood is officially ruined, so I get up for the day before waking up for real.

Dream - Lucid

I was going into Dallas and I's bathroom. It was very dark. I had to get up out of bed to poop. I started to sit on the toilet, when Dallas came into the doorway and started coming towards the toilet.
"What are you doing? I have to poop!" I said. He kept coming. I got up. I assumed he had to poop too.
"Are you really gonna make me use the other bathroom?" I said. He didn't say anything. I took that as a yes. I started to head towards the doorway to our bedroom to go to the guest bathroom. Dallas started to shut the door to our bathroom. I then started to hear noises coming from the living room area, and started to panic a little. Someone was in our apartment. Before Dallas could shut the door all the way, I caught it with my hand. I said something like
"Dallas, someone's in our apartment!"
I started to panic, and all my vision went black. I tried to scream for Dallas, but nothing came out. I then realized that I had been dreaming, and decided to calmly wait for myself to awaken instead of panicking.

I then woke up on Dallas's chest. Phew, just a dream. I was so glad. I then started to hear noises again. I was really confused. Was I not awake? I started trying to wake Dallas up, but he was dead asleep. I pinched him, I tried to yell his name but again, it wouldn't come out. Really? Is this really a dream again?I thought to myself. Vision went black again, and then I woke up for real.

Another 10 minute nightmare. I wasn't asleep long at all.

~

I was at a bowling alley bowling with Dallas, but it was more like ski-ball; we were throwing smaller balls at the pins down the lane instead of an actual bowling ball. There was almost no one there; we were the only ones playing. Dallas then said something about how the bowling alley was closing for good soon; it was going out of business. I looked around and I could see why. It was so dead in there. I then went to throw my ski ball, but it slipped out of my hand and I accidentally threw it behind me.

I then saw a very small child, a male toddler, carrying what looked like a six pack of beer up to the lanes, but it was actually a six pack of ski balls.

~

I had these two cakes made for me. I was at work I believe. Both were big and delicious looking with cream cheese icing on them (freakin yum). One had off-white cream cheese icing with red decorations. I had to do something with them to keep them safe or something, I can't quite recall.

Then, I saw the outside of my apartment. Someone was coming up the stairs. It was daytime outside. Then, something happened; a roll in a bag of rolls died? And it seemed so inconsequential, but I couldn't proceed with anything at all now. It was like playing a Sierra adventure game, where you don't do something in the beginning of the game and you get to the end and you have to start all over. I had to "start over" from a point before that to see if there was anything I missed, anything I could do to prevent the death of the roll.

~

Yay insomnia! Again! Woohoo. Also these 10-minute nightmares are very puzzling to me. It has happened to me quite often in the past few months. I guess what I don't get it how am I dreaming without being in REM? I thought REM sleep came later in the sleep cycle? Like, I will literally be asleep for 10-15 minutes for these nightmares. There was one that I was asleep for about an hour. Anyone have any thoughts?

A nightmare involving a creature called the Sandman whose facial features are fluid, constantly slowly changing; and then a false awakening in which the Sandman creature is approaching my POV character's bed.

(Woke up. Back to sleep.)

I'm walking around the grounds of a mansion where I've been staying. Talking to someone, he's looking at something behind me and says, "Look at that, straight out of a painting." I turn around to look. The sky in the distance is yellow-tinged and nearly completely covered by these two dark slabs of storm clouds, like solid walls. The opening between them makes me think of the parting of the seas. The water beneath those clouds is being tossed up in such a way that it's revealed an old and famous shipwreck, it's been pulled out of the depths. Another ship, a modern one, is thrown out of the sea by the winds, and it crashes straight through one of the massive floor-to-ceiling windows of the mansion.

(A false awakening mostly about trying to describe that last scene, then actually woke up. Back to sleep.)

I'm looking after an enormous, shaggy black 'dog' - more like an enormous wolf - that belongs to my neighbor. Most of the dream revolves around playing with him and petting him. When I go to feed him, his water is kept in a intricately curved copper tube, almost like a French horn.

Alright everyone, this morning was quiet out of the ordinary as I had 2 FA's which I both turned into LDs. Not only that but for the first time I was able to interact with a DC (my mother) and I got a response that still leaves me with a lot of questions...

1. Panick at the mall

I'm waiting in a que for something in a supermarket and I seem to be having a good talk with a couple, we laugh a bit and eventually we go outside. There are many people and we're all very packed together, accidently the guy I was talking to bumbs into me and fall down in a puddle of water. I notice the sleeve of my pyjama being wet and I say in a very kind way that it mildly annoys me. Then I'm suddenly on the other side of the mall sitting at a tavern drinking a banana/kiwi smoothie. It's raining very hard outside the windows and the square is empty, the woman that sits at my table is slightly worried as she talks about a new type of tornado that forms during rainfall. I look outside again now paying attention to any whirlwinds and suddenly see one forming. At first it's small and transparent but quickly it grows in a large dense tornado, the woman runs away deeper into the mall leaving me alone and I leave too after I first finish my smoothie that actually tasted quiet good.

2. Awakening* (DILD)

I wake up dazed and see the very early light of the sky that still looks dark and grey, it's 05:00 in the morning I think and don't give it much thought. Until I see the clouds in the sky moving abnormally fast followed by planes flying in a formation. I become slightly suspicious and do a nose-plug RC just incase, what do you think I can breath through it like it's nothing! I sit up in my bed an feel the sheets who are very thin, I do the RC again and try squeezing my nose as hard as I can. It feels like I can squeeze it as tight as paper but still feel no pain and breath normally. Then the dream gets unstable and I feel waking up slightly disappointed.

3. Awakening 2.0* (DILD)

I wake up again and notice I can still see the sky through me windows, even though it's cloudless I still become suspicious because my curtains are open. I do another RC and well, we're lucid again!
I sit up and again start doing the RC multiple times, it's about 06:00 in the morning now slightly brighter than previous LD. I sit at the edge of my bed and think about the fact everything is fake and a product of my mind, I consider doing some RCs I haven't done before, like turning on the lightswitch. It stays dark and I sit back on my bed looking at the switch trying to activate it with willpower or something. I notice my mother sitting at the computer in my sister's bedroom, I ignore her at first but when she walks into my room and starts folding some of my clothing I feel like I have to do something.
I'm slightly worried about what her reaction will be because I still feel this mental barrier of doing things infront of DCs that aren't normal. I start a conversation with her beginning with a very controversial statement in my eyes.

(A= me, B= DC-mother)

A: "You are not my mother."

B: *giggles a bit*

"How nice of you to ask it like that."

"I'll explain it to you, everything you see right now is 'you'."

"You are my child which means..."

A: "That we're genetically partially the same...?"

B: "Yes."

(Note that the actuall conversation was a bit more vague and somehow I got information from her telepathically or some other way.)


Then I notice old pictures of me and my sister as children on hanging of the side of my bed, in most of these I'm happy and playing around. I also see some pictures of my father being happy too and looking at me. I was between 6-8 years old I think in these pictures.
For some reason this made me very emotional and I couldn't help but start crying, it is at this point that I wake up for real

So yeah I was quiet impressed by the answer I got from her, I think by the time I saw the pictures I actually lost most of my lucidity though.

So I slept from 12midnight - 3am, then couldn't sleep until my alarm went off at 6:45am. I hit the first snooze and as I drifted off, I got WILD vibes. This is the first time I had this particular type of sensation: As I fell back to sleep on my side, I suddenly felt like I was on my stomach with my face pressed against the pillow when the vibrations started. I found it difficult to turn this into lucidly getting out of bed, and when I finally did, I kinda fell over. Then the alarm went off again (9 minute snoozes).

I was still on my side, and I drifted off again, and felt vibrations again. I was able to get out of bed a bit easier this time, and looked at my phone. The screen lighting was dull, and the otterbox was fitted all weird. I couldn't think of any tasks other than the 2 I had already done, so I just left the room and went down the hall to the livingroom. DC Danny was sitting on the couch, and I just randomly decided to do a karate jump kick. As I was suspended in the air in a kick position, the thought occurred to me to continue the kick through the window, but I woke up when the alarm went off again.

I fell asleep again, then suddenly woke up, worried that I had slept in. So I reached for my phone, and it was like it was in one of the DEILD chains: messed up case and screen. LUCID! So I ran back to the livingroom for a second go at the karate jump kick. Didn't even notice if Danny was there this time. I did it and aimed for the window, willing myself to phase through foot first without breaking the glass. And it worked!!!! My foot went through the glass as if it were made of a really stiff jello. I float-flew a bit outside, and it was so nice. Early morning, lots of dew on the grass, and the streets were a bit wet as if it had rained during the night. Sin was sparkling off everything, and the air was cool but not cold. I flew up a bit too high and felt a bit of vertigo, so I landed on the edge of the roof. Then I tipped forward with my feet still on the edge of the roof, and straightened my body, tipped until I was parallel with the ground. Very cool sensation. Then I put my right foot out in front of me, and let it stretch (or the ground moved up or both), until it touched the ground, all the while my left foot was still touching the roof. If you could see it, I probably looked like I was doing the splits, while my legs doubled in length lol. Then I put my left foot on the ground, and took off running through the wet grass that sparkled like emeralds. It felt so good, but I woke up after a few seconds. I checked my phone for real this time, and I still had 2 minutes left, so that last dream + falling asleep time only lasted 7 minutes.

The fact I got so little sleep was so incredibly cancelled out by the buzz of these fun lucids. I wasn't that tired at work, didn't even need a break, and only took a 2 hour nap when I got home. Everyone should be so lucky after a night of insomnia.

Ritual: Went to bed at 2am, much later than I had intended. Wanted to wake up between 4-4:30 if possible so I could make a sandwich for my husband to take on his flight. Didn't set alarm, only intention; if it didn't work, that was fine. Woke up promptly at four so got up and went to the kitchen. Then I realized if I didn't stay up to give him the sandwich he would never know it existed, so in the end I didn't go back to bed until after he left at 5. I repeated my tasks aloud a few times to make them easier to remember, using simple keywords: "eyeball, calcifer, fairy tale." Wanted to give SSILD another fair shake after recent lack of success—been falling asleep too easily. After this hour-long WBTB I arranged a ramp of pillows to elevate my upper body and settled back to do SSILD, supposing that the half-reclining would help inhibit sleep. It did—and I realized I had been semi-dozing rather than really sleeping when I got up again at 5:40 and decided to dismantle the pillow-ramp to get some proper sleep. I didn't notice REM during any of these sleep and half-sleep periods so I wasn't optimistic, but I did a couple SSILD cycles on my side before drifting off to sleep fairly quickly. It was 6:30am when I woke up for real (after FA) and began this account.

FA: "....it ignored me, and I felt silly talking to a fire."

Okay, guess now I have to start over. Wrote half of the account up in FA. Which is funny, because when I woke up I did sense that I could probably re-enter the dream state but decided not to because I wanted to write a solid report on what I'd done so far. And here I had felt so responsible and industrious! I wrote down quite a bit but only remember the last line word for word, so I reproduced it above. It's interesting that it is worded in the past tense. My dream reports often swap randomly between past and present tense but the present tense predominates.

DILD: I was in my bedroom in the half-light of early morning, and I heard voices outside the room. This confused me, because no one else should be home right now. One of them sounded like my brother, but he shouldn't be here. And I could hear another voice, a man's voice I didn't recognize. I grabbed my phone from the nightstand, thinking I'd dial in "9-1-1" and have the call ready to go if needed before I investigated further, in case it was burglars or something.

The phone wasn't working. It seems to be stuck on the calendar app, and even this is in some weird and confusing format. I keep pressing the main button to try to get back to the home screen so I can reach the page to dial from, but nothing helps. I still hear the voices and worry that the intruders might come into the room before I can get the phone working and then I'll have no recourse. Should I go outside to the back patio, so it will be easier to run away if necessary? At some point the absurdity of the whole scenario finally strikes me and I wonder if I'm dreaming. Since no one is around to see, I do a quick nose pinch. I can breathe easily. So I am dreaming! Oh good, there were tasks I needed to get done! I realize that since this was a DILD, I'm probably already fairly well-integrated into the dream state and check my impressions. A bit of roughness as I begin to move but not too bad, and the dream feels stable. I don't feel the need for further stabilization as long as I can avoid letting the paranoia of waking wake me up, so I put it out of mind and walk rapidly to the kitchen.

I've brought my phone and figure it might come in handy at some point later on, so I try to slide it into the pocket of my skirt. Trouble is, I'm not wearing a skirt. I make the "sliding into pocket" gesture a few times, intending a long skirt with pockets to manifest, but it doesn't and the phone falls to the floor. Whatever. At least the pattern is in place, so I feel confident that I can get it out of my pocket later if I need it.

I grab the bread from the kitchen counter, noting that it is a packet of round pita bread rather than the sandwich loaf that is there in waking life, and head out to the patio. Which task first? I love the idea of Howl's Moving Castle so I decide to start with that one. First I try to summon the castle directly, not through any special method, just willing it to approach on its own legs. It doesn't appear promptly, so I start with plan B: conjure a fire, call it "Calcifer," and feed it until it becomes strong enough to build the castle from the ground up. The first part should be easy; I've practiced conjuring fire before in this very spot. So I hold out my right hand and concentrate on creating a flame in my open palm. There's just one problem. It is raining, quite heavily actually. Typical dream perversity! I'm trying to fill my palm with fire, but meanwhile it is filling up with water. I ignore the dream's little joke, and keep concentrating on the fire.

Sure enough, I shortly begin to feel the heat and see the brightness of the flame. I set it on the ground and start feeding it chunks of pita bread, calling it "Calcifer" and trying to coax it to respond. It grows larger at first, but doesn't show any sentience, and now the rain is causing it to dwindle despite my attempts to feed it. I decide to continue this experiment indoors, out of the rain. I pick up the fire, just carrying it in my hands, go inside and set it down again on a flat stone ledge, about two and half feet in width and height (the interior of the house no longer corresponds in any way to RL). I feed the fire and continue calling it "Calcifer" to try to get a response, but it ignores me, and I feel silly talking to a fire. I go outside, careful to take the fire out again with me so as not to leave it untended in the house, and fly up in the air before releasing it. I instruct it to go seek out Howl's Castle, hoping that it might reappear at some point later point in the dream.

I return to the ground, once again in a place recognizably like my back patio, though it is no longer raining. What next? I realize the eyeball task should be quick and easy, if I can stomach it, so I ought to knock that one out of the way. I consider going inside the house to use a real mirror, but I don't want to waste time so I stand outside the sliding glass door to the kitchen and rely on the faint reflection of myself I can see there. There is nothing unusual about my reflection—much less so than usual, actually. When thinking about this task in waking life I had decided (for the sake of safety and squeamishness) to try to remove the eyeball in a more hands-off way, simply raising my palm and trying to pop it out through will alone, but now that I'm ready to go I don't even remember that idea. Instead I lift my right hand to my right eye and just start digging in there. I feel a momentary discomfort, enough to make me think, "I'd better be damn sure I'm dreaming!" before I feel the fingers slide smoothly into the socket with little pain, and this reassures me.

The eye pops out easily, but it is attached to a surprisingly thick, gross, fleshy stalk. Even at the time I realize that my experience has probably been colored by other accounts of this task I've already read on the DV thread, some of which mention similar stalks. The stalk is inconvenient and ugly so I keep pulling until the eyeball breaks free, then turn it around to inspect it. It looks remarkably like an eyeball. I had been hoping that it would transform into something cool, like an orb of glass or even a jewel. But nope. It is a disturbingly life-like eyeball, with a distinct iris and pupil and even a bit of red tattered membrane where the stalk had been attached. When I aim the iris and pupil toward me, they already look dead and unseeing, so it doesn't occur to me to try to use this eyeball to see with. Also, although I don't take note of this at the time, in retrospect I can report that there was no subjective change in my experience of vision; I was still "seeing" as though with two intact eyes.

I had meant to look at my reflection again after pulling the eye out, but I forget to do so. Instead I'm absorbed in inspecting this very ordinary-looking eyeball and trying to find any notable details to report. I do observe that the iris seems to have changed color: from the initial blue it has faded to a drab brown. It is still kind of creepy to be holding my eyeball, so without experimenting further I pop it back in. Luckily no difficulties there, and only then do I remember to check my reflection. I look normal and still don't notice any changes to my vision. I feel a momentary regret that I didn't remember to try to transform the eyeball into something else before putting it back in, but I feel reasonably satisfied with the task so I'm ready to move on.

Now I'm down to the last of the three tasks I'd planned, and I feel a bit apprehensive. In one way or another, this damned Hansel and Gretel idea has been eluding me. But I still have my bag of pita bread, so I get started: my plan is to start dropping breadcrumbs as I walk, hopefully find myself in a forest, and see what happens from there. I re-read the story a few weeks ago in my copy of Brothers Grimm, but I haven't tried to flesh out the intended scenario because I want to give the dream leeway to respond creatively to my breadcrumb trail. So I start walking across the patio and dropping crumbs, and now I just have to figure out which way to go. My original plan had been to start on the street in front of the house, which had once transformed into an ideal forest in a previous unrelated dream, but now I'm behind the house and want to get started right away rather than have my plans potentially disrupted by a detour. It's okay, I'd planned for this too. I figured the hill behind the house might be wild enough that I could start climbing it and work it into a suitable forest. However, now when I look in that direction, I see a paved concrete footpath that leads between suburban houses with neatly trimmed lawns. Dream is being perverse again. In the opposite direction is a second path, smaller, with a similar suburban aspect. Which one will lead me sooner to a forest? Both look completely domesticated. I figure I'll just start with the first one and try thinking "forest" as I go. I start off, dropping my bread crumbs, but with no warning I wake up—or out of the dream, at least. As mentioned above, I sensed that I could re-enter the dream state but decided to write my report instead, was under the impression that I had gotten up, and wrote for quite a while before waking up for real.

read the dream yoga section (after reading the introductory parts earlier) of "The Tibetan Yogas of Dream and Sleep", very excited about the practice.

00:00 Tuesday 2014-08-12

00:17 pre-bedtime. day memory review, set strong intention to LD

00:35 bedtime

03:00 ? awake, hear sounds coming from wife and son in other rooms, a bit concerned about sounds from outside, take off mask and look out the window, BTB.

04:38

+(f) something about a farm?

05:46 LDs #48 and #49, they were awesome

+ in my room in the night, the door to my room was open, my wife and son (S1) were making noises and they came into my room and turned on the light. S1 wanted to do something with my computer which I needed for work, he wanted to install his own 3d chip into my laptop, I'm upset what are they doing here in the middle of the night, I'm tired, it was like 3am, I didn't want to let him do it, this is my work computer anything you do to it could ruin it. I feel a bit bad about rejecting him so I say "ok you can do it, but for one thing don't come in here at 3am." Then I get a *creepy* phone call, I answer it and I here a voice say "Hey, <my full name>, <something>" (I don't remember what they said but I understood "they" were watching me and weren't friendly), kind of laughing at me, I wondered how they did that. I returned to my bed and saw a low cabinet/closet open in the wall, there were pillow and sheets there, I was taking out some pillows. I'm back in bed and starting to get lucid?...

+ ... I'm suddenly in my sister's room in my chldhood home looking out into the hallway and am instantly lucid, I went out into the hallway, and started down the stairs. I started thinking about what to do and I decided to summon a DDGSHG I had seen before, and the dream ends...

+ I'm standing in a hotel lobby in just my underwear because I had locked myself out of my room. There are people in the lobby, the front desk is a circular island in the middle of the room, there are clerks there, I go to the front desk and say I locked myself out of my room. I felt a bit awkward being there in just my underwear (but not very much), they didn't respond to me so I go back to the elevator. The buttons were strange and I wasn't sure if it was actually an elevator or not, it seemed to open into a bathroom, the buttons were all located very low to the ground, they were all lit, I couldn't tell what was going on. I got out and walked through a dining room, I knew it was late at night, there were people eating, at a table, food on a buffet, I saw what I thought were sushi sandwiches, I continued walking by, I walk past a woman who whispers to her companion "that man's in his underwear!" and I angrily respond "Yeah, I know, that happens when you get locked out!"

+ ... and I'm in bed, "awake", in a dark room, but I thought I could be dreaming still, nose pinch showed that I was still dreaming. I tried to get up out of bed, I could move my arms and legs which went up into the air a bit but my body wouldn't move. OK, if I'm stuck in bed lets summon KS my highschool sweetheart. Should I teleport to the swimming pool where we were on our awesome swimming date? I feel my heartrate start to increase dramatically (either dream or actual, I don't know) at this thought, I know I have to calm down so I decide "forget that." I am able to roll out of bed and I'm standing in the room. It's a small hotel room with a wall-sized window running from floor to ceiling, covered with closed blinds. The orange lights from the city street lamps are leaking through the blinds. I know I'm in a room up high off the ground and there is a city outside. I'm sure I'm dreaming, but I don't want to fall and die so I do another nose pinch, and I step back away from the window to the wall at my back and take a few running steps and stretch my hands out superman style and fly right through the window and blinds out into the orange-tinted cityscape, I'm way up above the ground look down and see people/cars moving on the street, there are other tall buildings all around, I turn towards my right and fly in that direction.

There was another big window approaching. I was doing "superman with a go pro" style power bursts of speed by thrusting my fist forwards forcefully, I could feel the acceleration of motion when I did this. There were people around, some were flying, some were on the ground, they were *very bright and vivid*, I was amazed at the visual quality. I do a power fly through this large glass wall, it's into a crystal clear but dark night scene with shining snow falling down. The city scape starts to head up into hills in front of me. I think I should be looking for a woman and I turn around in the air and I see a big bulky woman approaching me, I reach for and squeeze her breasts and she turns into a man with man-boobs, I think "no no no be a beautiful woman" and he turns into a young beautiful woman, her right breast is exposed, it is firm and lovely, I reach to take it into my mouth and I wake up.

Takes a long while to get back to sleep but I want more lucids! I feel them in me, just gotta get back to sleep. Takes all my sleep kung fu and concentration but I eventually sleep again.

10:02

+ going into a small convenience store. I do something wrong or have stolen something, the store owner gets mad at me, I'm kicked out, I feel lucky to escape with my life.

I order lunch at the pizza place (LV) I order the lunch special, one guy goes on an on about how LV is better than the other place LV has the original flavor, I place the order with a guy who's outside. Then I return to this place and I sense it's been a long time since I placed the order but I know that my lunch must be ready, I have the guy I ordered with go and pick it up I think that's better because he has more authority, I hear him talking to the counter, apparently it's not ready yet and that they have to make a second one and give it to me free.

Scene inside a house, a small boy is a servant/slave, I see his small boy face, the young man master is preparing to murder the and place him into a box. The slave boy didn't do anything wrong, the master man says "it's just that kind of a thing." I'm observing. The master is wrapping the boy up in tape. Then a guy (from the convenience store gang?) comes up stealthily behind the evil master and sticks a long knife deeply into the bad guy's side, he does that several times. The young master freezes in shock and pain. The young man's family enters at this time into the dining room (on a level above the room we're in) it's a very wealthy family they're shocked at the scene in the living room below them.

+(f) PA vs. K (cities)? There are two houses and I see their addresses and say them out loud.

+(f) With MR parking a car on HC. Getting something out of the back of his car.

+ on a floating (in the sky?) boat there's a party prepared for one guy by his gay lover, he walks up the stairway to his lover who is the host and they're going to get down to business.

+ I see a convenience store mafia guy again in my parents house at a party our eyes meet he has a goatee I nod to him in recognition he doesn't acknowledge me back. Later there's something to do with money, if he gives me back all the money he'll kill me and he starts to give me money and I start to freak out but he only gives me a few coins and decides not to kill me.

August 10, 2014

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I was on a long train ride for most of the weekend; I only really remember one dream from the whole ride:

I had just woken up and started walking around the train; I went to the front engine and got to drive the train, but I don't remember where I drove it.