non-lucid

...Not that I was ever really active here. But I want to continue working on my journal and become active too. I haven't had any lucid dreams in a while, and I think updating this is going to help. Besides, this is a cool community and all.

I only remember 1 dream from last night.

Dream 1: I think I was outside of a house. Under the house there was this toy chest, and the toys in it were singing and talking. Now I don't remember what we were talking about, but it was apparently a good conversation. Then, two adults (probably in their 30s-40s) came by, and I remember closing the lid to the chest so that they couldn't see the talking toys. xD

My problem was when I wrote this dream down, I was still pretty much half asleep. So I think I fell asleep before I could write down the rest of the dream. I know there were more details initially than what I recall now, but of course after waking up they slipped my mind. :/ I'm sure with practice I'll get it down.

I forgot to mention I took melatonin last night. Going to keep track of when I do and don't take it in order to see if there's any correlation. I don't think there is, but maybe.

I'm flirting with this young woman. A while ago, me and Julia had this mission that required us to help her. I think of her as sort of coltish - she's got an unbelievable amount of power and no idea what to do with it, aside from awkwardly trying to help the people around her. Incredibly endearing to watch. Afterward we'd gone back to England, but now I'm back in America. Julia didn't come this time, and I said it's because she's busy with her music right now, which is true. But the main reason I'm here on my own is because our mission might require this girl's death. Julia doesn't know, and I don't want her to have to be involved - she likes this girl, we both do.

Sorry if you find any spelling or grammar errors. This was long to write and I had to correct my mistakes. OTL

First Dream

I recall eating a soup with lots of good fresh vegetables with my brother. We were at a younger age like 10 or 8. But after we were done we were in a mall and were supposedly playing a game where we had to defeat the zombies. I jumped down a escalator and kicked a zombie in the face but my brother was annoyed."That's not what you were supposed to do! Your doing it all wrong!"

I shouted sorry at him and asked him how was I supposed to do it. But he just left me alone. I wanted to go to my mom to tell her how stupid my brother was being but than ran into a big lady who was supposedly someone my mother knew. She said to take the number code that she was going to give me and to give it to my mom so that she could call her. After she left I found my mom and my mom showed me another small rectangular card with a number code.

" Hey! I almost forgot. Your friend gave me this number for you to call her." We looked at the one my mom got and the one I got and I think I found that it had two similar numbers 3490. That's all I could memorize before the dream ended.

Second Dream

I remember that in the dream me and a couple of DCs had to stop zombies from taking over. I think we got into a argument though and I broke one of the guy's 3ds somehow. Also, I think there was a cartoon zombie character following me around and supposedly he was our friend but than he left the team because he was mad at me for some reason . I felt bad about this and tried playing animal crossing to get it out of my mind.My brother and two other DCs asked me what I was sad about. I told them I felt sad because of what I did but than slowly realized that what I did was only because I was in the dream.

I than thought about my castle goal than closed my eyes and imagined myself flying to the castle. Everything around me began falling apart and building into a different scenery. At first it looked like I was going to get a church building surrounded by buildings but than I kept trying to focus and managed to get a building that looked somewhat like the castle. However, as soon as I started to fly around it, it began to change into a tall building and other buildings began to surround it. Apparently, my mind wanted the castle remodeled into a city area. Lol

I flew around to see if I could find a castle like building like the one in the picture and found one that looked like it was slowly morphing into a castle form. But it was different from the picture. The windows were outlined in a light blue color with arched windows small but detailed and the castle that was forming was like a reddish brown. I was still satisfied with the effort though. (It was also realistic looking)As I began to observe it I started hearing instruments being played and it sounded like Spanish music. I flew around to see where it was coming from and the place began turning into a city again. I flew around some more and noticed there were people on top of buildings playing drums and singing happily.

I decided to sing too because it looked fun and started singing and used two sticks to try to tap a beat. Everything seemed right with the dream world but than we suddenly appeared in a area that looked like a restaurant/movie place. The DCs were all talking about how unusual this was and then a DC shouted" look over there! What is that!?". A eight foot type of purplish deformed man monster thing came down and broke a piece of the roof like cover for the building. The DCs began to scream and run around afraid. I knew I had a advantage against the beasts but decided to just go different scenery that was less dramatic. As I was trying to leave two of the beasts came to me and one that looked more like a man with blue eyes and black hair. I tried to use charm for him to let me go and he looked content.(I wasn't really on their side though)

It was like I was now safe but than as we flew he wanted to go another way with his monster buddy to scare and takeover the dream world. I told him "I like you .Your a nice guy". He looked at me sad though and said " Yeah right, Your just saying that. As soon as the wind blows you'll be gone with the wind." I thought about it and in my mind I was like" that's actually a great idea to escape! But I think I should stay to help the DCs...." As we started flying again I opened the black cloak or jacket I had on and felt the wind move towards my direction. I took his quote literally and let the wind blow me away. I could see his frown but than he just went with his friend in the other direction like he wanted to say "I knew it...But I have a job to do."

The city scenery began to change into a nice green pasture where there were houses for the kind that needed to be surrounded by the castle. I was content with this but in my path I noticed kids crying with their mom who was trying to comfort them. I flew more than saw a Asian old woman who looked like she was deranged and lost. A woman came out the house trying to comfort her. Than I flew past another house where a Spanish lady came out with her mom saying she was in disbelief how her husband left her and ran off by himself. I thought about how sad the DCs looked and was thinking " Should I just save them and see what happens?....Or should I be selfish and just leave them?..." I thought about it for like four seconds and was about to go to fight but I woke up. It was a really interesting journey that seemed just like what was suppose to happen in a castle like town with a evil enemy.

Third Dream

I was inside the dream with Eye and was talking with him about what he felt about me. He told me that he cared about me but couldn't tell me things in full because he didn't know how to tell me. Than as we started talking about his past he started to play a character that was dieing from the extreme cold on his bed. His lips slowly began turning purple and he was shaking. I found this odd but just watched until he finished. We started to laugh when he was done playing the dieing human.

I hugged him than started kissing him but than a DC burst through the door.I told the DC to go away but it wouldn't so I told Eye to keep the random DC out. He took a chair and pushed the DC out than locked the door. But than another door opened and I suddenly appeared in my backyard in the cold snowy weather. I stared into the sky than got up and floated through the yard than into my house room. I started calling for Eye or Dawn but there was no answer.

Out of no where though a invisible DC started to create more and more walls in the room like they were trying to hold me in a small space or squish me. I flew out but than it grabbed my legs and flung me really far into the air. I thought this was going to be a fun way to test my defense. But when the DC picked up two huge towers and started demolishing buildings in its path I was surprised at how reckless it was being.

I decided to fly farther away from it and reached a area where pirates were carrying boxes. The DC began to acquire its form more and dropped a house on me. I was now in a house and it was building more and more things around me so I couldn't get out of it. No matter how hard I tried to go through the roof I failed to get out. The song Boku Note by Sukima switch played for a few seconds than I woke up.

I'm not sure if that DC was Dawn or just a random DC but I'm sure it wasn't Eye cause Eye wouldn't fling me around like that unless he was mad at me. : P


Fourth Dream

I was in my house trying to take a shower but the tub was clogged. I got out mad and complained to my dad that the bathroom was a mess. He told me to just move the books out of the way but I was still upset. Than something I don't recall happened and I ended up walking into a MCdonalds. As I was walking I saw a boy with blue eyes and dirty blonde hair talking to another guy. There was something about him that made me want to listen to their conversation.

A girl came out of no where and pulled me into a corner. She asked what I was doing around here and I said " I don't know. I just wanted to get something to eat." I than heard the fresh pretty cure song and thought about how cool it was they were playing it here.The next thing I remember is walking with two boys trying to get candy to a safe place away from a bully.

As we were walking I saw a boy had a sword and asked him where he got it from. He said it was fake but when I opened it I could see the blood on the sword. I was shocked and he told me to give it back. We started fighting for the sword but eventually I got it from him. As I was walking I appeared in a empty apartment but heard my cousin's voice. I thought about how odd it was to hear my cousin's voice here than realized it was a dream.

But just as I was going to fly away to the castle my aunt came to me and begged me not to go. I told her I had to and slowly started flying higher into the air. But than my aunt jumped and grabbed onto my legs begging me not to leave. I told her it was fine because I would just take her with me.

I focused on the castle we were going to and flew at full speed to the castle spot. When I arrived at the spot though the castle was missing. The french prince of bel air characters than appeared and told me the castle was missing. I was like "what!?"(I was surprised because I put a lot of focus to going to it just to arrive at a empty spot) But than I walked to another building and decided I would turn the huge rectangular building in front of me into a castle. The characters were talking amongst themselves as I put my hand to the building and it began to change.

When it was done it looked like a castle but not like the one from the picture. So I took a different approach. I asked the dream if it could make the grass like in the picture, the windows, the door and everything else. It started changing and it reached to the point when it looked like the picture. But everything was darker and the outline of the windows were gold now. The mood and scenery of the place looked gloomy.

I was going to enter anyways but just as I was going to open the butler stopped me and said " Where are you going? Don't you see the sign on the door says do not enter?"I told him it didn't matter and just opened the old door anyways. But to my surprise the inside was small, with lots of corners into other small rooms as if it was a behind the stage area. Not at all what I wanted to find....I was happy that I was there though and started to sing a song as I was walking a long.

I don't know why but I chose a song from the little mermaid. The funny thing is my voice came out exactly as ariel's voice. I decided to stop singing though and petted a golden retriever I found in the room. My next goal was going to be to call my guide Dawn into the castle but after waiting for him a few seconds I woke up.

We're (me and a few others of who I can't recall) are in a boat and we're competing with other people of who I can't recall. The objective is to hit one another with a paddle and whoever hits who first, wins. Sadly I get hit and I fall into the water. I remember seeing my breath in the form of bubbles floating ahead of me as I sink farther and farther into the deep blue sea. I remember one thought and this thought only: What if a shark comes and eats me whole?
So I try to swim to the top but the pressure is too immense and all I can do is sink and sink. But somehow I gain the strength to swim to the stop and I do, but as I'm about to reach it I feel the darkness below me start to pull and above me I see a hand. I reach for the hand and it pulls me to safety. I realize it's a friend from my old school. It's weird because she was always a good swimmer but it also makes sense why she's the one to save me.

I never knew if my team lost or won. I will never know and it kind of bothers me, but it doesn't matter, I guess.
After that the rest of the dream was a blur.

I was in the LRT area. Then I am in a jeep. We're in the middle of nowhere. It's dark outside, with some hints of trees and grasslands, like in the province. I wondered why I travelled here.

I was in a provincial area. I was in a shack/house made of bamboo or some sort of wood. Rob was there. I was looking for the comfort room. There was none, only a general area (inside the house) where you can pee. Uncomfortable. There were cats. I think one scratched me.

Okay here how the dream starts I'm near the ocean it's nice and windy I'm just standing there behind me are apartments I see people in them and I started walking to the apartments I go in the building people waving at me saying hi and I went into my apartment I sat down and I went to sleep(which was weird) but as I lay down the tv was right in front of me I couldn't really see anything just a beep sound coming from it I heard a lot of movement going on in the apartment building I figure there was so kinda of party going on so I just sleep.When I woke up in my dream it was really quiet couldn't hear any sounds really I went outside the wind is blowing that's all I hear I look around the area it was so much life here last night this place is like a big city and I expected to hear more noise but I just went back in the apartment I can see the beach from here.here. Im sitting down on a chair there is an alarm clock ringing it's really annoying for me it's coming from upstairs I really got mad about that
So I went up stairs to tell the person living there to turn it off.I go upstairs as I'm waking up its so quiet just as before nothing but the wind is what I hear I go up to the room where the alarm is coming from I knock on the door but as I knock the door opens by itself I walk inside I closed the alarm clock I see a cat he's staring straight at me it was so creepy he/she wouldn't stop staring I figure it was hungry I look and see the cat food in a bowl but it's overflowing like there is so much it goes on the floor.I say to myself where is the owner I look all around couldn't find him I started to get so scared I yelled "IS ANYONE HERE" "HELLO!!!" But no word back all I heard was the wind.out of nowhere I heard a beep sound coming from the television but this time I saw "Warning warning "I looked outside I see a giant wave of water coming towards the apartment then I got on my knees the cat ran under the bed I said to myself "I don't wanna die please stop" I woke up from there my eyes were in tears...

Although I cannot remember exactly, I have been planning to get from UK to France.
Because somehow I was unable to fly or use a boat, the plan was to go in a truck. Some friend of mine had a father that could arrange that. The father was ill or disabled and would go too. I remember going to a boarder office somewhere at the harbour. I purchased some tickets and then returned to the loading bay where the truck was. Two builders were loading loads of bags with cement on the truck. There were bag everywhere.

Then I when we were just about to leave, the gather got stubborn and decided that he didn't want to go. Without him it would be impossible. I was sitting by the door, doing something, I have a feeling that it was somehow spying on him or plotting something to trick him.

thats all I know.

Outside the gym, parking lot right up against woods. Park my car on the edge. Right off the edge the woods goes downhill into sort of a giant ditch. Nighttime. There are random pumpkins throughout the woods on the ground. Friend goes to check it out, breaks a pumpkin. There was a humanoid trapped in the pumpkin. Kind of like a fetus, but it would have never hatched if someone didn't break it out. Once broken out of the pumpkin humanoid was normal adult size. They look different though, kind of fluffy, more teeth, etc. I break more pumpkins, friend leaves at some point. They're heavy and difficult to break, it's hard work. Suddenly they start coming uphill on their own and breaking out on their own. I'm a bit scared, they just keep coming out. I'm not scared anymore, they're greatful to me. Government shows up and starts fighting them for some reason. We hide, I am their leader. Lots of running around the woods, etc.

Suddenly, I teleport to a different solar system. I fly over the outer planets (there are a few of them, then the two that are alike in color and size, then a small one near their sun. Their sun is a dull white color, as I fly into it, I become that star and I shine larger and more yellow (even though scientifically, the yellow is cooler, in the dream it feels warmer). Then I see from a 3rd person point of view, the sun and a moon hanging out in human form in a pool. They're in love, but for some reason it feels like it's wrong.

Fast forward to the center of the solar system, I, leader of humanoids control the team of robots. There used to only be 450 of them, now there is a team of 1800. They're like robots or mechas (think japanese anime), they can also terraform, activated by me with the code 06. I experiment moving the terrain.

I fall into an icy river, and race a polar bear to a floating ice berg. We both get there at once, and climb atop to get out of the water. Floating for a little while, we approach a large waterfall. I suspect there are lots of rocks at the bottom, so I jump to shore before falling over the edge. Several people run over the edge of it, telling me to do the same. It is really far to the bottom, so I can't tell if they made it safely or not. I decide it's too risky, and turn from the cliff. Walking uphill, a young lady is next to me, quite short, and I can't see her face. Suddenly, I recognize her, and she's my age it turns out. She climbs on my shoulders and I give her a ride to a small cottage. No one seems to be home, but she wants to check first before we go inside. I take in the beautiful warm night scenery around me as she checks. Not much light, just a dim glow to the grass, the ground, and the cottage. There are some trees in the distance that all blend together into one blob of shape and color. The whole dream seemed rather surreal, and very fluid.

I notice I am seeing myself from the 3rd person now, I am tied to a lawn chair on the beach, next to someone else who is also tied to a lawn chair. My head is strapped to a palm tree behind me, and I have a cut in my neck. It doesn't look good. I appear to be having my neck slowly cut open. I don't want to scream because of the hole in my neck, but it seems like I only have one chance to get help. I let out a huge yell (still watching in 3rd person as I do this), and blood spurts out of my airway that has been cut open, not making much noise. The man behind the tree then swings his heavy knife, and in a few whacks, severs my head from my body. I feel sick to my stomach. As soon as my head is severed, my body starts pissing freely into the sand, no longer under conscious control. A guy nearby laughs at me because I'm peeing myself. My killer sneaks up to him, and shoves my head right in front of his face. Scared greatly, he now realizes why my body was peeing.

My driver's pulling the car over. He apologizes for this - stopping here instead of taking me home. It's on "her" request. (He didn't literally use the word "her," we're speaking Korean.) He'll of course be here to drive me home afterwards, if I don't decide to throw him out and drive myself (which has happened before.) He's bracing himself for a bad reaction - which he probably would have gotten, I'm pissed off and want him to explain himself, but then I'm distracted by the people outside the car. Among all the people on the sidewalk with black umbrellas, there's one umbrella in dull red. I know the woman carrying it. I get out of the car.

I recognize where we are now - there are stone steps set into the white stone wall that runs alongside the road, leading up to a cemetery at the top of the hill. Someone I knew was buried there not too long ago. There are several people here with the woman with the red umbrella - they're dressed trendily, and I think of them as very young though I'm only a few years older than them. They're acting like they're going to a celebration, loud and upbeat. The woman with the red umbrella hangs back and takes my arm, watching my reaction to them. They're a part of the life of the person who was buried in that cemetery, but it's a part of his life that's completely foreign to me, something I never saw when he was alive.

I was at the beach with a friend, it was on the shore of a large river and it looked like we were in san Francisco because we could see the golden gate from there. We were casually talking about stuff, I remember him talking about going camping with a bunch of friends which I didn't know, but I said yeah why not, suddenly while I was looking In the distance I saw this HUGE meteor fall from the sky and hit the water pretty near us, there was an incredibly big explosion after, I could see the ground crack up and coming quickly at us, everyone panicked and started running, and so did I. Ditching my friend I ran for my life while everything was falling apart, after some time running I remember ending up in a forest or some kind of post apocalyptic forest, the landscape absolutely gorgeous, it was very green and we could still see some old building under the green carpet that the nature did over time, it felt like I was in a completely new timeline, but I knew I had to build a shelter or something. There was a waterfall with crystal clear water so I decided to build a camp near it. At this point one of my friend found me and decided to strand with me, I debated with whether or not we should fill our water bottle with the water, I insisted and he gave in.

We decided to go back to ground zero for some inspection and to assess the situation. While we were on our way we stumble on an old internet friend, when he saw me he was pretty happy and he showed me his real name Benoit Garneau, which is my grand dad name, that was weird but I was pretty excited about it for some reason, he joined us on our way to ground zero.

When we were at Ground Zero I remember that beautiful sight of the HUGE meteor which created a perfectly round mountain with some rigdes around and surrounded by water and with the devasted Golden gate jsut like in movies. There was now a retierement home being built with a water park across the street, I recall asking myself how much time was I in the forest.

That's pretty much what I remember.

I remember going to an interview for Activision for some game testing, once I was there I rushed to the men's restroom where I started to take a piss in the urinal. The place weirdly structured and it made me completely exposed if someone came in, someone did and it was a beautiful redhead, medium height with a cunning smile on her face, as I watched her come in I managed to miss a shot and splash her a bit with my piss (lol), I didn't notice at first but she looked at me and said something like, you know you could be fired for what you just did, and I said, did I just pee on you, she nodded. I was embarrassed, but she said it wasn't so bad and looked at my junk and said that it was quite decent then left the place. I was confused.

I'm not sure what happened next but I was in a classroom with her and some other guy, we were chatting as far as I remember. At this point we were in a MMO which looked just like real life, I remember finding out I was on an OCE server and told her I wish she'd come on US East, then I asked her where she lived, she was in New Brunswick, I asked her why'd she choose to be on OCE servers and she told me she had no clue. She started chatting with the other guy who looked like a huge orc in WoW and I just laid down and started to let my mind drift away. (The fact that she said she lived in NB kinda shocked me since I just ended a relationship of 4y because my ex-gf moved there and I decided I didn't want to follow, I remember being sad in my dream because of this) Once I was done drifting away I asked them if we should go get some ice cream, we all agreed and started to move.

(Note that I was strongly atracted to that girl but nothing actually happened yet, beside us being pretty at ease with each other and her calling out my junk earlier)

We were eating ice cream now and she started to be flirty with me, I kinda played back and then as I took the last bite of my ice cream she asked if she could taste it, I said sure and we just straight up make out, it was awesome (this is a scene from Oliver, stoned. Where the girl smokes weed for the first time, its a cheesy movie but I watched it the day before, now that I think about it the girl had a similar figure has the girl from the movie)

Anyway sometimes after that we started getting chased by some NPCs which we fought and and as we ran away, we "farmed & explored" in the MMo until I woke up.

I don't remember her telling me her name but when I woke up I remember writing it down and it was Evelynn, I have no acquaintances with that name and I felt pretty shitty when I woke up because I felt like I lost someone I had very strong feelings toward, it was just some sincere and unconditional love towards her even though we just met.

Some more from the past. Undated, Early August 2014:
We were reborn as children (5-6? yrs old) like in that movie, but there were somehow 3 of us instead of 2 (bf and I). The other me? didn't want to continue being with us, and said so and left. Just as I was about to tell bf (I still did later), our video connection got cut off on the laptop and the vehicle (a boat?) stopped suddenly, flinging me across the floor, with my laptop & white russian (drink) in hand. The drink fell overboard but me and the laptop got caught on the rails, and my new dad went over to console me.

Extra notes at the bottom:

• We remembered everything from past life
• What was that song?
• Cartoony angels at some point
• Woke up crying

---

August 18th, 2014:
Virtual reality goggles, bunny rabbit as a pet

Undated:
Winter. Saw someone breaking into cars parked outside. I quickly hid behind the curtains but I was not fast enough. He saw, started walking around the apartment building, looking inside windows. We started turning off lights, triple-checking door locks, closing curtains.

---

Later that night:
Some kind of pretty vial, said to contain LSD. We come from another dimension and brought it with us.

---

August 4th, 2014: (word for word from paper)
Several dreams, do not remember them all. One of them was lucid, involved, being given shots for being 'crazy' because I had trouble talking, not sure if this was toward the beginning or the end. Floated around to maintain lucidity when started to lose it, gripped a metal object. Felt it, it was so real, cold, etc. Woke up at 3:40AM. Laying in bed until after bf left for work. Fell asleep again around 7ish, in and out. Saw a taxi from the sky, it drove into a river. Then I woke up inside a taxi driving on the road (snow covering everything in both scenes). I asked "Where am I?" and a voice out of nowhere said "[Friend's Name Here]'s House." and I opened my eyes to my bed. Vibrations/being pulled into wild. (I guess I got lazy at this point because that was the end of the page and no more notes)