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Alas that is all I remember, just a vague memory that a dream happened. Got to start focusing on dreams again.

Two days ago, I was reading about SSILD and I thought I'd give it a go as soon as I could, and this time was today. This morning I woke up after exactly five hours of sleep, so it was the perfect time. I did a WBTB and read about SSILD during this time. Then, I went back to bed and put the technique into practice until I fell asleep.

In the first dream, I was flying. It was a game, like I was playing in a fake reality, so to speak. In said game I was a heroine and I had to solve whatever issue I came across. So well, I was flying around when I heard an explosion quite far away from where I was. I decided to go towards the explosion, flying over the road, and I could see at least 20 police cars, with their blue lights on. The dream was more detailed than that, but I spent more time writing what comes next.

Then, I opened my eyes and I was in my room. I thought "quite an interesting dream I've just had". I got up to pick something up from my desk (I can't quite recall what) and I noticed I couldn't open my eyes properly. I thought I may still just be half asleep. I made a noise and I heard my sister, we share a room. I couldn't make out what she said. Then, I went to bed again and at that moment I realised "why can't I open my eyes? Could this be a false awakening after the SSILD?". I pinched my nose and, sure enough, I could breathe through it. I didn't do this first RC properly, I must say, I just did it very quickly after the realisation. I got out of bed and thought a couple of times: "clarity now!", to see if my eyes would open. The reason why I just thought of it and not say it out loud is because somehow I feared my sister would hear me and think I'm weird. I mean, I was aware, but I couldn't believe I was in a dream. Anyway. I then ran out of the bedroom and up some stairs, thinking maybe the running would open my eyes. While I was running up the stairs I thought I'd be a good idea to do another proper RC, just to be sure. I looked at my left hand and it had six fingers, and my palm was larger than normal. For some reason this scared me and I let out a scream, but I stopped myself from getting too excited. Then, I did the nose pinch again with the same results, so I was entirely sure I was in a dream.

The stairs led me to the roof of the house. Just as I stepped outside, my eyes opened and I could see the surroundings with detail. The view was the same as the one we get from our real roof. I could see the neighbours' gardens and the church tower. It was cloudy and the sky was a faint yellow. At that point it struck me (I don't really know why) that I could not control the dream. Say, if I wanted to change the sky and clear it of clouds, I wouldn't be able to. But I didn't care. I was too busy admiring the detail of the view. Then, I felt a really strong curiosity to know what the chalk wall would look like close-up. So, I went very near a wall and looked at it closely. I stared at it for some seconds and I was overwhelmed by the vividness of the dream. I had read that some dreams could feel very real, but I didn't know it could look that real. At that point I thought from now on I'll see ADA, RCs and all that in a different way. Finally, I reached out my hand to touch the wall, I wanted to know if it was so real at the touch as well, and at the moment I touched it, I opened my eyes and I was on my bed again. My body felt heavy and somehow I knew I was awake for real, but I pinched my nose again just to make sure. Then I got my phone and started writing.

Morning of May 1, 2014. Thursday.



I have a couple large game sections (possibly incomplete at the time) that feature a three-walled area open on one side where a griffin moves while standing mostly in one place, facing the open side. I believe the feet are connected to some sort of mechanism through a slit in the “floor” of the compartment. Perhaps the goal is to put the two griffins face-to-face with the platforms linked together to “fight” in a sort of game similar to the classic “Rockem Sockem Robots” game. This is not certain, though - but the griffins do seem to have the same two colors (as the robots) dominating but more integrated into their overall multicolored form. It actually seems a bit more complex than that, involving an additional quest or higher goal, perhaps even from an RPG, with the possible griffin fight being only one aspect of it. I mostly have the box and the game parts in an area of the kitchen (Stadcor Street - we seem to be living back in Brisbane).

At any rate, parts of the game mechanism get separated from the rest. This is because a section of the game seems to be outside for a time, taken out by one of our young sons perhaps. The pieces that get separated are like two different important rubber pieces that need to be in the mechanism or the game will not work at all. One is just like a belt from an older cassette deck, another like the very small rubber “hoop” (not the flat washer but circumferential cylindrical) used in some faucet setups.

The side of the street is quite different than in reality. Instead of the curb going directly out to the street, there is a very deep one-foot across recess (along the entire street) between the curb and the street (somewhat like a deep rain gutter for a roof) that is full of branches (a few which stick out a fair distance), leaves, and various organic and inorganic debris. Our youngest son goes after the small rubber hoop when it rolls across the street somehow, but ends up with the cassette-deck-belt-like part instead when I did not even know it had gotten to the other side of the street. It seems some of the other parts may also have been lost deep down in the recess, which may be about four feet deep or so. I do retrieve one part and see another part a bit too far down (and blocked by narrow crisscrossing dead branches) to easily get to. There are also similar pieces in the area, much like the game parts but more worn or broken, like tiny “tires” (perhaps from old Matchbox Cars) and broken bits of sinew (the type for crafts).

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What does it mean to dream of a griffin? At the core level, a griffin is a flight symbol. A flight symbol is rendered in a dream in subliminal anticipation of the hypnopompic waking start. Additionally, a griffin is a mix of unrelated animals, which is likely to be a unique precursor factor of the coalescence of the preconscious and emergent consciousness.

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Some of my other dreams that feature griffins (links): (1) Griffin vs. Grandfather Clock, (2) R Brand, (3) Making a Griffin?, (4) The Temple and the Tomb

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i dreampt i was at a giants game and i sang a really great rendition of ant no sunshine when she gone. then they hit up a milkshake to some lady whos birthday it was. aftwerewards i drempt iwas at this part of millbrae where ltos of prostitutes and sketch people went pay. i drempt mark and i were seeling like perscription drugs to pepople. he was shooting stuff with an air rile. tried to shoot a cat i told him which cats not to shot. he had long hair and was tall. then dreampt shelly and mark and matt were at a home and thiangs were better mark was giving stuff to shellys new bf

I'm on my bed playing with a camera, trying to take pictures of a city park in front of me, when a dark mist covers part of some trees. The image on the LCD looks very dreamy to me. Then I tell a DC on my side "it looks like it is a dreamscape". I try to get more pictures of it, until the the haze is to dark and the images turn in black. I get exited because of the possibility to get dreamscapes with this camera, then I point to a door on my left, by moving just the image on the screen with a smooth movement of my hands (it looked more like a 1st person game motion). When I press the button, I see the illumination of the image like the sun is moving really fast until I get a beautiful photo of a tree with its roots coming out of a wall next to a door. It's filled in blue and green colors besides the dreamy shadows. I'm fascinated when the DC turns into my wife and she tells me that we have to go somewhere.
I want to take more pictures, when I notice I'm pointing a window in front of me. I put the camera down and I realize it's a known dreamscape in the outside! I tell her "Wow, there it is, it's THAT dreamworld I love the most!! I stand up from my bed to see an abandoned train station in the outside and tell her: "There is the old train station!!..." Then I take one more picture. I hear the sound of an analog camera when I press the button. I look around to realize the whole dreamscape, I'm simply fascinated!
My wife doesn't seem to get interested at all, and she starts pulling me to go. I ask her to wait a little. I just want to go out of this dark room and explore, because I'm starting to realize what it means (it's a dream). Then she holds me from my genitals and squeeze them. That hurts and I'm thinking for what to do to get rid off her. I wonder about the pain, and she insists to take me out from here. I complain about it in a friendly way, trying to see the situation as something funny, but it's hurting me...
Finally, I'm lying on the floor, with the camera on my hands with my wife pulling me from my genitals... then I wake up thinking perhaps she has something interesting to say or do...

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #207: Christmas in April

I’ve joined up with a bunch of other people and rented a blue-carpeted condominium. There bedroom of this condominium houses the entrance to a vast cave system and we crawl downward to explore it. I have to do sort of a funky sideways roll to slip under the entrance.

The cave’s well-lit, but I start feeling claustrophobic. I turn back to make sure that I can easily get out and I’m shocked to find that when I execute my little sideways roll to escape, that I just barely make it out. This means that in only a few seconds, the entrance has gotten shorter! I warn the others that the entrance is closing but they ignore me.

I relax against the wall and for some reason start imagining that my hands are moving. I’m surprised to see my hands really are moving. I can’t believe how vivid my imagination is and I think If my imagination is this good, it’s like being able to lucid dream any time I want! And then it occurs to me that I’m dreaming right now.

I dig my fingers into the thick, blue carpet for a moment and then stand up, rubbing my hands and arms together. I move slowly, relaxing and letting the dream continue as I explore the apartment. I move through a total of four rooms, studying the layout and furniture of each as I pass. I recognize the den from the non-lucid portion of the dream and it’s almost entirely unchanged from before. I walk a quick circle around the wooden coffee table, confirming that the scene and all of its contents are unusually stable.

It concerns me that I seem to be stuck in just one type of scene so I move for the wall and phase through it. The phase is quick and I end up outside at night in the front yard of my house. I try to remember goals, but they just won’t come. I really focus on this for a moment but I feel the dream starting to wobble and destabilize. Back to some arm-rubbing, and I forget goals for now.

I look west down the street. Everything looks realistic but it’s way too dark. I turn around, think There’s some light behind me, and then spin back around to face west again. About two blocks down, I spy a lone Christmas tree festooned with lights. I’m pleased by this, and I try to just let this idea flow. Soon there are lit Christmas trees in front yards all up and down the street. Looks like my darkness problems are solved.

I head west to the end of the block then turn south. It looks like my street for a bit but as I continue it transitions into something more like a crowded outdoor mall. DCs bustle back and forth, and just as I’m passing a wooden bench and a free-standing sign that looks like a mall directory, I see a teenage boy and a smaller kid of about 8 (his little brother?) walking past. The older brother tells the younger, “Don’t worry about them. All these people have never done a goddamn thing for you.”

Again I get the desire to remember my goals. This time I really push for them. I dig too deep, though, lose focus on the dream, and am too late to save it before it ends.

I don't recall my dreams prior to waking up. Maybe not noteworthy, or I've just gotten out of the habit, which isn't good.

I also vaguely recall being lucid, but the dream was so fuzzy that I'm not sure. I wish I'd written down my other lucid before I "lost" it, but it may come back again. You might think "How could you forget it?" but it happens from time to time.

I woke up. Decided to lie back down and try a WILD... I would say it was maybe 7 in the morning. I haven't gotten to sleep in for a long time.

As I lay in my bed, I let myself drift. It's true that WILD gets easier and easier the more you do it... these days, it is, anyway. I've been struggling with it for years, though, and it's literally taken years to get to this point.

Anyway, I began drifting. When I say "drift", I do mean it... I sometimes feel like I'm floating on gentle waves. My attempts at WILD used to be unpleasant and frustrating. The "wind tunnel" is no longer really an issue, even though it used to be an extremely unpleasant part of the experience. My ears don't pop and my eardrums don't spasm any more.

I drifted gently on the "waves" and decided to let dreamlets come and go until one of them stuck. I was now floating in the gray fog I've become familiar with. Sort of a 3 dimensional fog.

The first thing I saw was... sort of a motel. An old and run down one, sort of like one we would have stayed in
near the casino when I was a child, except it had 2 levels instead of the one I remember. It was hazy and distant, and quickly faded away.

More drifting and fog. Some glimmers of things, but they didn't turn into anything.

Then, I was standing on a beach facing the ocean. The environment was semi-tropical... not really fully tropical, but warm. The ocean was very calm.

The sun was setting on it, and had become a bright ball of light sitting right on the rim of the horizon. It sparkled and glimmered on the waves. The clouds were ablaze with light from the sunset. For some reason, as I watched it, a series of chills ran down my body from head to toe. I was lucid, but it was beautiful, and I was content to watch the sunset.

The sunset faded. Eventually, a hazy scene began to materialize out of the fog. I was back at work again - ugh. I was standing in front of a shelf full of medicine, sort of in the pharmacy.

I decided that if I kept ending up back at work, maybe this time I ought to just roll with it and let off some steam. I decided to do everything I would normally never get to do. I began running from the pharmacy to the clothing department, running my hands along the shelves and knocking all of the bottles to the floor.

Everything was still foggy, but got slightly more solid as I ran into the womenswear. The whole dream mostly stayed foggy, despite my efforts to make clearer. As I ran past some racks of clothing, I saw that the lingerie section wasn't where it should be. "This isn't what would normally be here!" I exclaimed.

I grabbed a green polo shirt off of the shirt displays - instead of womens' shirts, the displays had mens' polos. I scrunched the fabric up in my hands and tried to make the woven fabric of the shirt look clearer and more vibrant. Then I rubbed it all over my face. It smelled sort of like mothballs or stale cigarette smoke. I decided that I was sick of things smelling like they ought to smell, and that these shirts smelled like strawberries.

I tossed the suddenly strawberry-scented polo away, and began grabbing armfuls of shirts and throwing them all over the floor and other displays, then ran toward the jewelry rack, knocking as many dresses off of the racks as I could on my way there.I remembered that I almost never speak out loud in my dreams, and I decided to change that. And instead of simply talking, I decided to sing. I grabbed jewelry off of the jewelry rack and began putting on as many necklaces, bracelets, and rings as I could grab.

"ALL OF THE JEWELRY!" I sang, and began tossing necklaces and bracelets into the air. "And only DIAMONDS for me!" I held up my hands, and all of the rings on my fingers now had gigantic sparkling diamonds on them.
I guess I was mostly satisfied with the damage I was done, because I decided to change the scenery. My scene changes almost never work, but I decided to

try a variant of "closing your eyes". I closed my eyes and felt around for what I wanted to find - the bed in my cottage. I found it and opened my eyes. The bed was semi-solid, but was surrounded by the gray fog. I tried to see the room's windows through the fog. I saw some window-shaped blobs of light, but the dream began fading and going dark. I tried to hold onto it, but the sound of the garbage truck outside was leaking through as it faded, so I let it go.

I just experienced my first WILD or OBE. I was trying to take a nap for about an hour when I suddenly had those scary vibrations running through my body. iI kept myself cam and instead of fighting them like I always do I felt my body go into paralysis. It was not as scary as I thought it would be, just letting go. Not a long time after that , I felt as though I were being pulled by my right hand up towards the ceiling. I couldn't open my eyes at this point (throughout the entire experience I could barely open them, I felt very weak) but I knew I was still laying on my side. As my arm was being pulled upwards I had the sensation of being picked up under the shoulders and I was placed in the opposite direction on the bed. It all had a very muddled quality to it, I remember opening my eyes and, my knees were on the floor and my upper body was laying on the bed, it turned into some kind of dream within a dream and my lucidity was momentarily lost to a dream.

My room essentially looked the same but there were things on the side of my bed that crackled like a plastic bag when i stepped on it. The dream I fell into was babysitting Elliot and I was throwing him up in the air and suddenly a man was behind me putting duct tape on my and his mouth. I remember then being back in my room not yet awake, though I thought I was, and trying to remember how to write this down, I was in front of my closet and I had what felt like tunnel vision, I could barely see anything and I had the sensation at one point that someone/ something else was in the room with me and that did end up scaring me into trying to move my physical body. I think thats when I realized I was still in bed and tried to really wake myself up. It is very difficult trying to pull your body out of the paralysis stage, I know it is nothing to be scared of but I'm not sure if I will ever feel completed at ease in that state. It was a very interesting experience..I'm not sure what I was expecting but that certainly was not it.

I had a dream last night.

I was home, where I live now. Everything was very bright and had vibrant colors. While I did leave the house, most of the dream that I remember takes place at my house. This guy that I know and don't particularly like is my neighbor in the dream and has a english bulldog. The bull don't comes to my house and I play with him. My two cats are no where in the dream and I cuddle with the bull dog in my room and there is sunlight everywhere. We were resting but then the dog must go home when he hears his owner (jesse) call for him. I follow the dog outside and Jesse is at the bottom of my porch waiting on his dog. I sit on my top step waiting for them to leave. In stead of leaving, Jesse sits on the bottom step and asks why I don't like him. I only shrug and he tells me that I wasn't very welcoming to him either and that he was only treating me the way I treated him.

There was other stuff that happens but that was the bulk of what i can remember. It seems that my dream is my conscious scolding me for disliking someone I barely know.

Pre pre: turmeric

Wbtb: had 1/3 latte, was more sleepy, so the ld was more stable, but tasks less accessible.

A dream starts with some scenario going while I'm in my bed in ex-bedroom trying to fall asleep. A moment of the usual confusion as I'm uncertain in the darkness which hands I'm moving. I think I'm moving my real hands because I can touch some of the furniture next to the bed. Then decide to make the dream appear, get up and expect to be able to move in the dream scene, which builds now fully around me. With slightly more confidence I go to the other room, where I examine the furniture layout. Contrary to my expectations the room seems very orderly, and nothing stands out to point out this is a dream. It looks suspiciously realistic and as if this is happening now. Then I have a look at the sofa and see dad and bf relaxing on the opposite sides.

I remember I wanted to do the easter egg task again. This time, I decide to just think of it rather than use hand summon to make the egg appear, then look to my side. There is a weird looking plant which is decorated with eggs. I pick a purple colored egg from the plant and remind myself to break it. Yet, the egg feels hollow and light and I'm afraid there won't be anything inside. I hold it for a while trying to make it a bit heavier and fill it with something to see. The egg remains light and I now worry that if I don't hurry up, these mental efforts will make it transform to something else, so go ahead and break it. The initial impression is that there is nothing inside, but as I examine the small pieces of egg shell fallen in, I notice there are a number of miniature banknotes inside the egg. I make a mental note for the journal.

The DCs change positions and now it's mom, dad and bf sitting on the couch and I start asking them questions. Unlike other of my conversations with DCs, these three can actually speak, forming entire complex sentences more or less answering my questions. I believe I have finally come across smart DCs. Unfortunately, I was unable to recall the most of the things they said, and had not been very prepared to ask them more questions either. This is what I remember.

My first thought is to wonder if it's possible those to be the real people I know, where we are all dreaming this here and now. I have some intuition that this isn't the case, but then wonder if it could be that all of us are engaged in this conversation in a different time (like the past or maybe the future), so I ask the DCs about that. My mom's DC starts to explain something about animals having the ability to do something similar to what we are doing now, but humans have lost this ability. I want them to continue explaining and ask them more questions I can't recall. The only gibberish moment happens when I focus too much on the speech and try to apply extra understanding to it. If I casually listen, they continue with their explanations.

The DCs change to other male DCs I don't know, they continue being smart and I feel close to them as if meeting friends I haven't seen for a long time. The conversation continues and I ask one of the guys something about the dream. He makes a remark that long dreams like this can be especially tiresome for some of the participants as if referring to himself. I'm out of ideas for questions, so try to remember the other tasks but the very strong effort to access this hard to reach memory causes the dream the completely collapse and me to wake up.

I do a mental review and still tired continue sleeping.

I am vacationing somewhere in the Caribbean when some man steals my wallet. Another man tells me that he knows that man is working for a drug cartel and knows where I can go to find him. What followed was a long chase across several islands utilizing planes and boats. We eventually cornered the man at this unassuming resort where the man who had been helping me explained that they were actually part of the same drug cartel.
The thief gives me my wallet back and states that this was actually just a plot to get me here. The resort manager opens a secret trapdoor behind the desk and leads me into this basement area. Once down there, he explains that this is not a drug cartel at all, but rather an international secret project to develop the first virtual reality simulation.
There is this girl with a robotic arm who has supposedly built the first prototype of the machine. The machine is huge, and I did not get a good look at all of it. But what I do recall was the room where you entered the virtual reality. It was a concrete room (because we were in a basement, duh) with wires and tubes running everywhere. There were four metal chairs, and there was a large chrome disc mounted on the front wall of the room. Several wires are clipped onto the outside.
And of course, I have to be their test subject, that being the reason they lured me all the way out here. So I sit down, and they place this small nose-breather thing onto me with this blue fluid running through it. Supposedly, it is supposed to help stabilize the VR link. robot arm girl fires it up and a beam fires out of the silver disc.
The room begins to distort and change. When its done, all i can see is the four metal chairs sitting in a black void. Two people phase into the other chairs and explain that they are agents sent in after me; the machine malfunctioned and locked me in. It also altered my perception of time, and now with every second we experience, an hour goes by. They let me out. I wake up.

22:45 bedtime

00:00 Wednesday 2014-04-30

05:34

+ in a rectangular bathroom, there's a narrow (1-inch) sloping channel running along the entire length of the long wall into the bathtub, there's nothing else in the room, suddenly there's a flushing sound and water squirts strongly out of a hole in the wall at the top of the channel and down the channel into the bathtub, I think this is water from a toilet flushing, I look at it expecting to see a yellowish color but it's clear water, I think I would not want to be in that bathtub when such a flush occurs. This was quite vivid, I both see and hear the water clearly.

+ in a bedroom with some girls there's one on the bed, some standing around, I keep closing the door to the hallway so we can get down to business, but someone keeps opening the door, this happens several times and I'm frustrated

+ construction of a bathroom, I wonder who's going to carry away the rotten wood, me or the workers

+ in a large area, it's an indoor ski jumping rink with lots of little ramps, some smaller, some really huge jumps which I want to avoid, the snow is slushy like from a snow cone, I look down to my feet and position my skis for a run, the bindings are like crocs and I have bare feet (skiing: minor dream sign, I've seen sandals bindings with bare feet before)

+ I'm trying to remember if I still hold some <company> stock, I can't recall if I'd sold it or not, I keep trying to remember, I need to sell it to raise money.

Tried SSILD, WILD, couldn't get back to sleep. Saw lots of HI. At one point I felt the beginnings of a body buzz and felt my dream hands starting to drift but this got me excited and I woke up

Note: I would normally separate dream (1) into 2 dreams, but they're kinda connected, because in both dreams there was a voice which told me I can summon things by expecting them to appear

Date: Apr 30
Sleep length: 7.5h
Techniques: DILD
Dream Summary:
(1) I was located at the middle of an ocean. There was no land around me, I basically didn't have a body in this dream, my eyes just levitated above the water. I heard a voice telling me to imagine a ship. It was the voice of a teacher. I started to see a ship. It was long, very white and clean, with some red stripes. Then the voice said I should imagine that it's levitating... and of course it started levitating then. It started to look more like a train and less like a ship. And it started to turn into 2 ships, a (still) long one, and an almost spherical one.
Then I was at a completely different location. I was in a forest, with big trees. The reason I'm merging those 2 locations into one dream is because I still heard the voice telling me what to imagine/expect. As if the voice was trying to tell me that anything I expect starts to exist. But I was too stupid to become aware of the situation. There was a row of people, and they all started trying to create big trees. I should have created one too, but I didn't want to, I just stood up and looked at the trees the other people have created. Some trees were beautiful, others were grey and almost looked like concrete. One tree was crooked and broken. Then I found I person I hate in wake life, li. The weird thing is, I get along with her in my dreams, as if we're friends. Maybe it's a message by my subconscious that I should give her a chance before judging her. The tree she has summoned was amazing. I laid down on the ground, it was very sunny and I looked up at her tree. I think I couldn't even see the top, it was huge. There were no branches either. The last thing I remember about this dream is being rather content and seeing her smiling.
(2) This is only a fragment, really. I've been in a desert, or maybe somewhere else, but in any case it was pretty dry and warm/hot. There was an AV star, but I didn't find her attractive. She was about 40 or so, and she was on a swing. We were talking about something, but I don't remember the topic. I guess I woke up then
Vividness/Awareness: 2/2
Emotions: content
Tags: levitating ship, small ship, forest, big trees, li, teacher;; AV star, swing, desert

(This was from 4/29/14)

I had a lucid dream. Surprise. My twelfth one. But it was cut short > : ( I remember thinking I might be in a dream. Where I was at this time, I cannot remember too well. Someplace a bit dark maybe? I think someone was with me? My dad? Can't be sure. I think the dream was actually in third person before I became lucid, because I remember seeing myself and changing the perspective to first person. I remembered to do a reality check. When I did it, of course, it worked. I then constantly reminded myself I was dreaming and rubbed my hands together a lot. I remember my hands feeling so...real rubbing against each other. I think I might have bumped into someone and I could feel how real the clothing they were wearing felt. It was all very vivid, perhaps more than usual. This might be because of the binaural beats I listened to before bed, which was supposed to induce more realistic dreams. Anyways, I was in a store. This time, it looked more like a Target. It was all nice, clean and bright. I refused to let myself get distracted and ignored the dream characters in the store as much as I could. I walked around the store a lot, through different isles, passing different people. Some said hello or something like this to me. I would respond, but keep walking. I remember toy isles, electronics isles, hair product isles, It's amazing how close it was to Target. While I walked, I continued to rub my hands together and tell myself I was dreaming, trying to stabilise the dream the best I could and keep it together, and thought about what I should do. I remember shouting "100% clarity" and everything in the isle I was in became even sharper then it already was. I could especially see a difference in the tile bellow me. I actually said "Woah." outloud lol. I thought about my dream goals. I remember thinking it was kind of more difficult to remember once I was in a dream, but I forced myself to remember. I decided I would try to look for my dream guide again. I then thought about how I would do it. I think about just going up to a door, but then I remember what I did in my first lucid. I walked up to a DC and asked them to take me to him. I decide I will do this again. That is when I start losing the dream. I remember thinking "No. Not again." I remember being at a brown front desk area with bad lighting, running into someone, and the dream ended. My alarm interrupted my lucid and woke me up T^T

Damn

I don't know what was lucid in these dreams and what wasn't. It's hard to tell anymore because I'm always exerting some control over my dreams now but it varies. Sometimes it seems I'm doing it a lot, sometimes I can't tell because its become so routine. My mind just runs in the backround like some unobtrusive computer program. Anyway, I recorded these dreams because of the intensity of my emotions and because one of them repeated itself 5 times in a row without me waking up. It's unusual due to the fact I I normally wake up before a dream repeats itself. It's like I was examining it, looking for clues like a detective. Anyway, without further delay here are my dreams.

4/30
My first dream came with a strong feeling. I don't remember exactly what happened. I just remember being asked if my Commanding Officer ordered me to take a life or if I had to kill someone if I would do it. I was running away and down a street because I was afraid of what my mind was capable of, what I was capable of.

The next dream kept repeating itself over and over, particularly two specific segments. A father is going on a long trip. He has a daughter who is beautiful. She has her long hair in a ponytail, she's a burnette, long, toned legs. The dad reasures her that friends will be coming by to check on her. She will be fine. They have a strong bond and love each other very much. This part also kept repeating; the dad tries cooking for his daughter but the the food gets messed up every time in some unique way. Once or twice I was also the father and the one cooking.