All DJ Entries

I remember my dogs barking at my 3rd dog on the bed in my parents' room in my hometown. My parents and brother were there with me. There were some scary parts I can't remember.

Morning of August 1, 2015. Saturday.



In my dream, I find myself in an unknown composite, atypical, and possibly a mix of Rose Street and North Monroe Street, though another location is added later on. I am seemingly in a house visiting people I do not really know (or recognize in conscious afterthought) at all, possibly my presence based on a friend knowing this family. There is a man and his wife, probably in their thirties and they have at least three teenage daughters. In some ways, this is the opposite of a typical imposer dream in that I feel as if I am imposing in this one (rather than people I do not know “invading” our home), which is so rare, I cannot recall the last time this situation occurred in this particular manner.

I am sitting in a cloth-upholstered armchair (not a recliner or at least not open as one) in what I am guessing is a large dining room. The large rectangular dining table with a dark brown veneer surface is longways from the wall (and against it on the opposite end) directly facing to my side of the room. It takes me awhile to realize that I am not dressed and just have a sheet around me. Still, not only does no one seem to notice, the married couple seem to be somewhat impatient or concerned about my not being at the table yet (though not angrily so; they are quite cordial and welcoming). The unknown female has apparently put a lot of effort in preparing a large meal and I feel slightly bad about not being certain if I really want to sit down with them (especially as I am only in a sheet). At the same time, I notice that there are only six places set across from each other (none on the edge opposite the wall though there would be room for one extra setting there otherwise), and this does not at all seem to be enough space for all of us (considering that there are also a few other guests around my age, it seems, though they may not actually all be staying).

I feel that the food should not go to waste, though I tell them I have to use their bathroom (mainly so that I may get dressed even though they still do not seem to care at all even though they are devout Christians). When I go into the bathroom, I am aware that it is actually the room I stayed in on Loomis Street when first moving from Florida in the summer of 1978. Through the doorway (south) is the (wrongly placed) dining room I had just left and to my right (west), instead of the door into the very large closet that adjoins the two bedrooms, it appears to be an open door that leads to a small unlit room that is also adjacent to the dining room. Also, there is no curtain on the south doorway, so I am directly exposed to people walking around in the dining room, who are seemingly becoming concerned at me not coming out yet. There is actually a toilet in the room directly facing the south doorway. I stand in this area trying to put clothes on (which were apparently absentmindedly left by another male) though people keep coming in and interrupting me, albeit either cheerfully or absentmindedly. This includes my sister-in-law Cindy (appearing as she did about twenty years ago) coming in from the west doorway and Zsuzsanna’s half-brother Simon coming in from the south doorway at different times.

Finally, the three girls come in and start yelling at each other and punching each other in the stomach. Then the mother comes in after a couple minutes and yells at all of them, and then all four of them are all wrestling around on the floor and rolling around and fighting and kicking (though I am not sure why). I decide I have had enough of this and will not stay for dinner after all and will just leave in a sheet. I have no desire to get involved in whatever issues they have with each other.

My dream’s ending was mainly environmentally scripted by at least two girls arguing outside our window (while they were walking down the footpath) when I was sleeping, as has happened in the past, thus changing the nature of my dream. The rest of my dream was likely heavily influenced by two Jehovah’s Witnesses (male and female) knocking on the door quite early around the same time period, as my wife had told me they left a paper which she immediately tossed away.

---

It was dark, cold night. I was wearing a gray hoodie and jeans trousers. I was moving through many dark alleys, avoiding street lamps or any spotlights. It was an anniversary of an important insurrection, I moved from an alley to a street with a strange can in my hand. I opened it, and made a signal. More people moved out of alleys, and opened their cans. It had some kind of paint inside. We threwn our cans at a government building and ran away.

Another dude joined me on the way through the alleys. He told me that there is a house with stuff from the time of insurrection, and that we have to sneak inside to take them back. I agreed, and we moved far away from the city. There was an old house in damaged state, surrounded by forest. We thought that we won't meet anyone here, and proceeded to break in.

The dude found keys to the house in a broken flower pot. We tried to open the doors, but keys just phased through them to the floor on the other side, with a loud noise. Suddenly, lights in the building turned on and we had to seek a hiding spots. The dude hidden behind a hedge, and I had no good spots, so I scrambled to a free space under the building.

I felt heavy weight lying on me, and had troubles with breathing. I could see the dude hiding, and heard the door open. An old man wandered outside for a while, then went back inside. We went out of hiding spots. The lights were still on, and we tried to break inside again. The old man must have heard us, and called for security.

The dude hidden behind the hedges again, and I looked for a new, more comfortable hiding spot. The men were coming closer, but I managed to find a good hiding spot behind some bushes. All of them just sat down and waited, knowing that someone is hiding there, without chances to escape.

UT CHiLLEN vs Rousey
I was versing Ronda Rousey at unreal tournament. She is an elite player with great accuracy. I'm leading the game but she is clawing her way back in. I begin to crack under the pressure and make silly decisions. The winning kill comes down to a sniper shoot out down a corridor. The range is pretty close, shooting non zoomed at one another. I hit her with some shots and eventually finish her off. My connections kicks me out of game just as it finishes. I really want to get back into the game as i don't want Rousey to think I beat her and ran from the game. I hear dad yell out something. I think it has to do with resetting the Internet. I tell him to hold on a moment as I try to reconnect to the game. I get back into the game and notice that Rousey enters also. I say gg and goodnight Rousey.

Dream Fragments
Abraham was talking to me through a females body. I think I was a bit skeptical or felt a bit awkward.

Old Mate Robot
At a Shopping centre. I see Dennis, and try to avoid him. I see Brodie, and seem to be talking to him from a distance.

Im standing around in a car park. I'm at my old house, laying down on my front lawn. I see Roberts sis walk over to dons, with one of her friends. Someone tells me robot is coming. He greets us with weird hand shake. He Pretends to root dads hand.

I'm in a car park and I'm spying on robot playing on computer. I thought he may be wanking. He's playing game that's soccer as I see reflection. He's playing against another guy. I got confused, as I thought robot was the other guy. Other guy has a girl with him. I tell robot about seeing his sis and that I jokingly liked her. I sense he's not happy with it. I cOntinue to stir him up. Dave thinks I'm gay. I try to prove to him that I am straight. I wipe ass with toilet paper then put in bag, then wipe it onto clothes.

Dream Fragments
1. Flashing dick in front of girl. Is bigger then normal or just looks it from my view

2. I let my dog sleep under my blankets

3. Some of my walls on coc are pink.

Black: non-dream
Blue: non-lucid
Red: lucid

Dream 1 - Lucid
I woke up in my room, my hands were in front of me and I knew that I was dreaming (I tried doing this to obtain lucidity a couple nights before but no success), I was in my parents house and decided to stabilize. I poked my finger through the palm of my hand and confirmed it was definitely a dream, and I continued on down the hallway. Who else should I see but my friend Samir carrying a tray loaded with breakfast goodies like porride, orange juice, bacon and pancakes etc... *smack* I whack the tray out of his hands sending everything flying, then casually stroll past, I glance back to see him shaking his head at me with a disappointed expression . Next I pass a girl carrying a cup of tea towards me, *smack* I backhand the tea cup out of her hand I keep strolling on as I pass through the kitchen, with a glance behind me I realize she's following me. I decide to make a break for it, thinking she's gonna catch me.. I run outside to the deck and pick up a random bowl of chocolate mousse to eat on the way out I leap off of the deck and try to fly
My attempt to escape with a leap of faith went awry as I found myself hurtling towards a dense packing of trees, my gut filled with the anticipation of impact woke me up... I tried to get back into the dream and managed, only to find myself falling towards the ground which woke me up again. I try once again but this time picturing myself safe on the ground which I failed at.

Dream 2 - SITS adventure
First off I'm outside a building where a friend is hiding from the zombie apocalypse, a man next to me is pissed at him (can't recall why) and decides to get revenge (his appearance and personality was a mash together of Ban from 'Nanatsu no Taizai' + Pariston Hill from 'Hunter x Hunter (2011)'). He shoots a flare gun into the air which immediately attracts the attention of a whole bunch of zombies, he does a flying kick through the back window of a car nearby (there was a man in the back which the window smashed into as well) and seats himself in the drivers seat. I hop in and he drives off, attracting the attention of as many zombies as possible with the goal of herding them at the friend he's angry at. I remember whizzing past train stations and stuff really fast, but then the dream transitioned into a 'prologue', a time before the zombie apocalypse.

There's a huge Man o' War jellyfish (the size of a large house) with a massive crest about 10metres high, it's sparking electricity everywhere and there's a boat investigating the strange creatures surfacing for science reasons. The electricity it gives off is too much for the boat and causes it to sink, I immediately dive deep into the water and hold my breath, I spend a long time underwater, swimming with fervor away from the tentacle monster. After resurfacing a couple hundred metres away, I see my companions being completely thrashed by stinging tentacles and electric shocks. Feeling the currents around me flowing, I start swimming towards a forested mossy shoreline (I get the feeling that I'm in the Mississippi River even though I've never seen what it looks like), I haul myself up which felt dangerous...
There's another with me, I think it's the Ban+Pariston mash guy, we hang on to a sideboard thing just above the ground as the tentacle monster has apparently followed us and if we touch the ground we'll get shocked.. It's tentacles flail everywhere and I remember getting stung at some point too.

Another transition occurs and now I'm in an RPG dungeon like setting with a group of companions, we each can pay homage to a god to earn their favour, and with certain stats you can increase the chance a god will grant favours to you... There are certain stats like Nobility, Harbinger, Philosophy, etc that you can invest in (this was my mind taking inspiration from the SITS game) and I had a low favour chance or something but a high communication chance... It didn't make much sense but yeh. Ban+Pariston guy was lurking around in the library we were in, it was a sort of resting place. I decided to look at the herbalism books and learn some new potions, Ban+Pariston then look around the altars in the room so he could switch his god to someone new. I remember wondering what he was thinking, how his true motives and goals were impossible to perceive... The new god he wanted was called Haruhiculi, and he was the god of the hunting the Fountain of Youth, which made me understand a bit more about what he was after - immortality. There was another god called Verrenculi who was the protector of the Fountain of Youth. I decide to help him ask for a favour from Haruhiculi, I hover my hands over the altar and with my willpower summon forth some purple glowing energies... I realize now that we've been spotted on the security cameras in the dungeon, we glance up and see a screen with a man looking up at us and decide we need to escape. The dream ends here without ever indicating how zombies happen...

I kind of stopped caring about getting lucid these past few days. And of course, lucid dreaming works in mysterious ways because just as I stopped caring, a flood of lucid dreams started to come. I can't remember what days these are from, except for the last one that I know for sure was last night.

-+-

I remember some dream involving being on a school bus that had broken down in my town. Manei and Marcus were there along with other dream characters. I became lucid upon recognizing my two dream characters were present. Marcus was talking to me about some new technology and, but I was distracted and wasn't listening. The little bit of hair on the right side of his head was sticking up funny. I kept trying to tell him but he kept talking for a few minutes. When he finally finished he asked me what I was trying to tell him, I told him his hair. He looked in the mirror above the drivers seat and laughed and flattened it out.

Manei then asked some question about the story that I was writing based off of lucid dreaming. (actually doing this) She told me that I shouldn't mis-potray the characters since doing so would be a disrespect to myself. I told her I had no such plans. Why would I use my dream characters for inspiration if I didn't like who they were and was going to change it? There is really no logic in that. Also for some reason in the dream she was wearing a schoolgirl outfit.

I can't remember but I think that the dream continued on for some time semi lucid. It was a school anime that DawnEye11 had animated and she was in it too. I don't remember any of the specifics about it but I didn't like the way she portrayed my character.

-+-

I remember I was at this museum, but some of the security guards had turned out to be evil and decided to trap us inside, and kill all the good security guards. It was some kind of hostage situation and they wanted the government to pay them a large sum of money to get us out. I recall the dream vaguely feeling like when my family visited the planetarium in chicago a few years back.

Me and some of the other people had found a way out. Though it was dangerous. We had to escape through this very large concrete room that was filled halfway with water. There were all of these large egg-shaped structures in the room made out of red bricks and held together with cement. Some of them were attached to large steel beams connecting them to the floor or ceiling. Others were hovering on helicopter propellers. It was only appropriate that I became semi lucid upon seeing this very dreamlike and unusual room.

People began making their way across the room to the other side. Most people just would swim, but this one guy said that a lot of people had cell phones and stuff that he would offer to carry over for them, and he would try to jump across the brick eggs. Also, the guy had a medical implant that he couldn't get wet, so he figured it only make sense that he do it. I remember the guy looked similar to my dad. Not identical, his voice was deeper and he was a little taller and fatter, but he gave me that same vibe.

I remember watching him make his way across. He made it about 1/3 across of the way then he slipped and started to slide down the brick egg toward one of the propellers. I remember hoping that the dream wouldn't start to become a nightmare with this guy falling into the propeller but sure enough, he fell into the propeller and was ripped apart in the most gruesome way right out of SAW or something. lots of blood went into the water and people all started swimming away because they were afraid that the blood would attract sharks. At first I was confused since the water in the room was a closed swimming pool and I could see there were no sharks or even a way for sharks to swim in. But, because dream, about two dozen little sharks appeared in the water and started attacking people.

The guys' head landed right next to me on the platform that I was standing on. The left half of his face was completely gone leaving only the skeleton. His head turned and started looking at me. The mouth opened and the head screamed at me.

Somehow or other I found myself in the water that was now all pigmented with blood. I was actually standing on the bottom and some of the sharks started to swim toward me when I realized I was not holding my breath and I realized that I was dreaming. I told myself that I was not scared of the situation and the dream would change to something better momentarily momentarily.

Instead, the dream decided to be a dick and get worse before it got better. The red water got darker and the floor went away and I was floating in a void of red energy/water. I could still see some of the sharks swimming around me slowly. I then saw Manei but she had been shredded up like the guy who fell into the propeller and half her face was a skeleton. Her body was stitched together in places. She said something to me but I can't recall what it was.

I tried to do something or say something, but I couldn't move, speak or influence the dream in any way. I was annoyed by this fact. I remember thinking. "Okay, either I wake up or I dream about something that's not this!"

Then metal spikes burst out of her chest, expanding and growing like branches all around me. Then all of the spikes started growing in as they would all hit me at once, but they all stopped right before they went into me and the dream faded away.

The dream shifted. I was in a futuristic looking white hallway. I felt like I was still in the planetarium. This girl in a catwoman-like costume that left nothing to the imagination had her hand on my body and was transmitting the dream to me.

"Stop! This nightmare! What does it represent?"

The dream switched into third person. She put her hand on my chin and made me look her in the eye.

"Oh, baby, wouldn't you like to know."

She then kicked me back and threw me to the floor. I tried to fight but I was in third person and couldn't control myself. 'I' got back up and she kicked me agian, then scratched me across the face. I then started to feel like I could control myself. I remember the scratches closed with wolverine-style healing and as I spit down to the side. I went back into first person view.

She tried to cartwheel toward me and kick me again, but I grabbed her foot and flipped her over my shoulder. She landed on her back and before she could get up and I stabbed her in the stomach with my hidden blade. She scratched me again and started to run away. I decided I would try something new. I shot my blade out on the end of a chain and it stuck into the exposed skin on her leg. I tried to crack the chain like a whip and pulled her up then slammed her into the floor. I then pulled her in and let go of the chain so she was flying toward me. The dream went back to third person but I was still in control. I jumped into the air and fire boosted toward her, then flipped around and kicked her with both legs.

After thoroughly kicking her mostly-exposed butt, the skimply-outfitted catwoman lady morphed into a small boy of about ten who was crying.

"Why weren't you scared? What are you?"

(Paraphrased.) "Because I knew that it was all a dream. Even now, it is all a dream. And the scarier it got, the more I knew what I was experiencing was not real. That, and the fear you created didn't represent anything in my life. Nightmares only have power if they represent something. Everything in dreams is like that. If it doesn't represent something important, it can be easily removed or defeated."

"That's no fair! Please don't kill me!"

"I'm not going to kill you. I'm going to do something much worse... (<- Joke) I'm going to let you live so that you can learn from this. (Paraphrased from here on out, I remember roughly what I said so.) So, stop going around causing nightmares or your going to get what is coming to you."

There was some story behind the boy that he told me. He tried to convince me that he was another dreamer who got bullied a lot during the day, so at night he would use shared dreaming to go into peoples dreams and make them have nightmares to make things fair. He thought that what he was doing did justice and was really angry because if made things fair. I remember posing the question of how this made him any better than the bullies.

The dream actually continued on semi-lucid for a very long time after that and the boy became a lucid dreamer and had his own dream guide and everything. Like the last lucid, I don't really recall the details.

-+-

I am on this steampunk airship where this quadrillionare makes his full-time residence. The airship is actually in the atmosphere of a gas planet, but the planets' atmosphere has oxygen like the earth. The airship had ion thrusters where the propellers should have been, mounted on gold nacelles. The body of the airship was a dark red fabric. There was a large inverted pagoda tower on the underside and the guy lived in the very bottom.

I remember we were flown in by this butler guy who flew this odd spacecraft. It was an octagonal frame with windows on every side, except the bottom. It was gold too, and had little maneuvering rockets on all sides. We docked with the big airship and the butler gestured us to go onboard and meet him. The airship was empty and quiet, but occasionally made creaking and buckling sounds..

We made our way down through each floor of the tower. I remember on one floor there were a whole bunch of boxes of legos. I thought it was kind of funny that this guy who was apparently so gentlemanly had so many kids toys. I figured he might have kids or something that come to play with them.

We finally got to the bottom level of the tower. It was like this big foyer styled room with stairs on either side and a big glass wall. The dream character was standing there looking out at the storms and swirling clouds. I remember he had a black suit coat and a top hat. He was looking out over the storms of the gas planet. I cleared my throat to get his attention and he turned around and walked over. He had a cane in one hand and walked with kind of a hobble. I could tell one of his legs was a prostetic by the way he walked and the clanking noise it made. I also remember knowing that this character was connected to Marcus somehow. Maybe his father.

I greeted him as he got close. Manei said hello as well and told him who we were and that we had been invited to see him.

"What is wrong with all your dreamers these days? Cut your hair and grow a pair, boy!" He proceeds to try to poke me in the nose with his cane I backed up. He then went over to Manei. He said something perverted to her, but I can't remember what it was. She gave him this really dirty look. He then proceeded to poke her in the stomach and say that she was too skinny anyway. He said he wasn't interested in talking to us anymore.

"Oh, great. He's annoying. He's perverted. and he invites us over just so he can decide he doesn't like us. Why does every dream character other than you or Marcus have to be a dick?"

I guess he didn't like me calling him a dick, because he threw his cane at me but I caught it. I told him I was going to break it if he didn't shape up. He said it was made of unbreakable [something]wood from the planet [i forgot]. I took that as a challenge and broke the cane partially over my knee. It was still held together by a little bit of flexible wood but it was more or less useless. The man got mad and said that the cane was worth more than me.

He sent a his bodyguard out. He was this huge, 8 foot tall man who looked like alex armstrong from Fullmetal Alchemist but had four eyes in two rows. He had an eye-patch over his top left eye. He told the guard to attack me. He charged at me, and I threw him over my shoulder and he went through the wall.

The guard started to get back up and the dream suddenly ended and I woke up.

-+-

Though the dream that moved me the most, or was the most profound in my opinion was a conversation that I had with Manei. The dream had started out with me being on vacation with my parents at this mountain lodge location. I became lucid when I saw that I had my bracers and my dad told me to stop lucid dreaming because it was bad. My mom and dad got into a fight about whether or not lucid dreaming was bad or not. I acknowledged that this was probably a message about lucid dreaming, but moved on to manifest Manei.

We started walking and talking about something in the mountains. I remember saying something to her like this.

"Don't be offended by this, but you're everything I never wanted when I started lucid dreaming. I find it kind of funny. So many dreamers want to find their guides so badly, but get nowhere. I was that one in a million who was more than happy happy to go alone. Yet you have been right here all this time."

We were now in the soccer field in a park across from my house. There were some kids flying very odd dream kites in the breeze. I remember Manei had a kite too. She seemed to be thinking of what to say.

"Often, those who want to be alone are those who need a friend most badly."

The dream was hazy and my lucidity wasn't clear. The dream carried on semi-lucid for a few more minutes after that.

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #2??: One Last Handshake

I walk down a long hallway to find my dad and my grandfather sitting next to one another at a table next to the top of some stairs. My grandfather passed away over 10 years ago, so I simultaneously feel overjoyed and realize that this is a dream.

I say, “I want the chance to shake your hand one more time.” He smiles at me. He was in a wheelchair in the years before he died, but now he just stands up and towers over me like he always did. I shake his hand, and hug him. For a moment I have the sensation of hugging him, but soon the visuals vanish into abstract shapes.

“I want to ask you just one more question,” I say. “Can I do that?” I don’t have anything in mind but for some reason I want to do this.

“Yes.”

“What’s your favorite memory of your time in World War II?” A map of the world appears. “Was it your time in Okinawa?” Wait, no, he was never in Okinawa. “Or Pearl Harbor?” He wasn’t at Pearl Harbor. As I name each location big red glowing circles surround different spots on the globe. Other spots light up at random too. I become confused about what I want to ask, now, and the moment slips away.

Now I’m back at the top of the stairs, and my dad and my grandfather have both vanished. I head down the stairs, trying to think of goals or Tasks of the Month. Nothing comes to mind, so I just wander through a long series of rooms that are decorated in fancy, rather frilly, and outdated ways. I run my fingers along the walls as I go, trying to remember to take my time with the dream and not to rush things.

I come to a room that looks like a kitchen and there’s a girl of about 12 standing here. She’s talking to someone, a man that I can’t see. The man says, “[Girl’s name]? Is that you? Prince’s little sister?” [Prince, as in the singer!]

Her: “Yeah, it’s me.”
Him: “But how are you so young? It was years ago when we fell in love…”
Her: “Yeah. Isn’t that creepy?”
Him: “No, I remember…” He says something about how she was much older when he knew her.

Now I have a false awakening where I’m lying on the ground in an empty parking lot next to a building. I’m still lucid, though, and nearby I see a door into the building labeled “Tony’s Dream Productions!” in fancy script. (This is a reference to Inside Out!) I realize that the man I saw in the previous dream scene is having a nightmare, and I should try to help him out. I mostly think Tony is a DC, but have this strong sense that I should still help.

I enter the building and find myself on some kind of soundstage with all of these different facades and bits of fake movie scenery. “Tony!” I shout. “This is a dream! That’s not really her!” I keep walking around the soundstage trying to get his attention.

Finally I see Tony at the top of a set of metal stairs. “I’m dreaming? How do you know?”

“Because I’m dreaming right now. You are too.” I tell him that I’m sure everything’s fine between him and the girl, and that he was only speaking to a dream character. Soon after I tell him this, the dream ends.

I'm in upstate NY with ThreeCat in a cabin. We have sheep and I want to wander with them as they graze. I think of the cats inside though, and decide we can just go out for a walk for the day. We go outside and around the back where it looks like the lumber yard of Lowes. People in a pickup truck are blasting their bad country music and we wander off. Suddenly we are inside of a Perkins-style restaurant with a buffet line of pies. ThreeCat orders a piece and gobbles it up. I'm aghast that he didn't ask if it's vegan. I ask him how he knows it's vegan and he responds “it is.” I ask the girl on the other side of the buffet line what they substitute the butter with and she says “nothing.” I tell ThreeCat this is a dream and he says “no it isn't.” I think back and wonder aloud how I got from the farm to here and he can't give me a good response. I check text several times (don't know what it says), but it doesn't seem to change. I resolve that this is just a dream and leave dream ThreeCat behind. I find someone and ask if they know where The Fool (from tarot) is? I'm directed to Doug's apartment, except the location is actually Billy's. I go inside and Sh_ is sitting on the couch. They introduce him as Charles and that he is The Fool. I ask him if I may ask him a question. He responds there needs to be an exchange and implies somehow that it must be sexual. I sit in his lap and give him a handjob through his tshirt. I then end up having oral sex with RL in a side 69 position, but she corrects my technique. I definitely lose lucidity and am unable to come back to the dream to ask the question that I want

Yesterday (07-30)

+ wine tasting, I've brought a bottle, so has my girlfriend, I'm trying to smell the wine she's bought but the bottle is not open yet.

+ jumping around in a video game, getting beat down, finally get up to the platform and complete, I'm congratulated by guys saying I've won an ability

+ in a house, pull on a secret control on a shelf activate a secret area, explore, there's a coffin, "hey comes help help me open it", out comes an evil female super being?, fighting her as the double-slashing dagger-wielding guy but she wins, she comes up and hugs you and sucks out your life

+ William Shatner with his head in a narrow tunnel (in a pirate costume?) beating off an attacker?, he and another guy are putting on movies in a back room then kidnapping/torturing one of the attendees, there's someone lying behind the counter, turns out he's alive

Today (07-31) better bedtime

23:23 bedtime

(several early pee wakings before dream recall shows up, just vague thoughts that vanish quickly)

06:30

+ buying shoes, guy says "you bought the $200 <something> you may as well buy the $600 shoes!", selection of fluffy ankle-high slippers

+ invited to Dubai to play a solo concert I'm concerned it's a ploy to get me to an Arab country because of my outspoken views on Israel; putting my instrument together, checking the key action, the top piece is broken I'm trying to adjust it / put it back together, a selection of reeds; I'm playing the slow movement of a famous concerto, under-tempo but it's lovely.

+ playing in a rehearsal, the conductor is all over the place, I say repeatedly, "are you in 2 or 4?! Show the downbeat clearly!", he retorts "listen and you'll hear the downbeats!", see my music (long opening sustained middle Bb) and then many pages of rests (I don't have to play for the rest of the piece), and the music of the 2nd, where there's a pencil marking indicating "1 only" (of the 2nd should play there).

10:39

+ I'm walking around and singing (lovely tone!), forget some lyrics, girl reminds me, "oh yeah" I say and sing them; girls singing in a line, one of them drops a contact lens, another picks it up off the ground and hands it to her, she pops it in her mouth -- how did she know the other one didn't make it dirty first?

+ my cat's trying to climb up / jump to the top of a tall dresser and just can't quite make it, she runs around the walls (I'm impressed by this) to get a head start, and my wife comes and laughs

+ wife asks about where's the little plastic thing that was on the car's wheel, the car is suspended 6 feet in the air we're looking up at it, the wheel/axel joint has a photo camera built-in, I say either someone took it or it blew off

+ terrorist attack: I'm hanging on a corner on a major street with a guy talking, later on we return after the attack started, armed guards shouting in arabic, a single nun in black robes is standing off the curb waiting to be picked up, story of the nuns raped in the bus (every single one), "we were just standing right there a little while ago!" I say to the guy referring to the corner

+ trying to return a girl taken by a "pit of Sarnac"-monster pit with tentacles along the conical sloping walls, two soldier/investigators are getting her back, they're talking to the monster threatening to reduce it to dust and burn it. They will analyze the dust/ashes and find the perfect harmonic frequency of flame to use that will burn it all up instantly. I'm DO floating above and see the two guys standing next to a huge bin full of purple monster dust.

with the girl afterwards I'm holding her and crying, I want her to be back, others are explaining that "they" made it so that you can "gather" many into one person, but once you've done that you can't "scatter" them back into many again, where each person retains memory of the original gathered one, I'm sad and rubbing my face all over her including her chest.

My family and I were on a trip somewhere. There was a big set of the curvy roads that go into other highways. It was night time, and we might have been in PA. There were a lot of street lights on, as I can remember their orange hue.

We stopped at a rest stop, because I begged for my family to stop because I had to pee really badly. When I got into the restroom, the entire place was just one big unisex bathroom. There were dozens of stalls everywhere. There were also hundreds of people. Whenever I tried to use one, someone else got into it first. Also, I had the fear that someone would watch me pee. Specifically my brother, and a few other people.

My brother was laughing at me and teasing me as I tried and failed to find a bathroom. There were many people that I knew there. E.g. there was my grandma's brother, N, and her friend, C, who I saw doing their business there. There were a few people from school, going to the bathroom as well. I remember my neighbor, K, waiting in line for a stall. There were also some hot girls there, pissing and crapping, too.

I also remember stalls that were connected with no walls. People were crawling into and out of those ones. I thought that was pretty weird.

I forgot if I actually managed to take a piss, but the dream eventually ended and when I woke up, I had the sudden urge to pee.

I was a wizard, escaping from undead armies led by a fearsome necromancer. Many times it nearly catched me, though I fooled it by sending some troops as a distraction. When I thought that I finally found a safe place - abandoned ruins, the necromancer jumped out from behind the corner.

Morning of July 31, 2015. Friday.



Notes: The included images are from one of my wife’s many journals, this one being from age fourteen. The two scans are from the same journal page, one showing a distorted Merkaba form, and the other inclusive of the line “I feel you around me even though you have not found me”.



Dream notes:

Yet again, many years of my life and memory “vanish” and I am probably about nineteen years old. I am apparently in La Crosse at the Post Office (though it is actually a typical muddled composite location). Several other people are around (mostly males around twenty to thirty years of age) even though it is seemingly late at night (and the post office would otherwise be closed to the public by then in reality). I do not seemingly know anyone else though there is a friendly atmosphere.

As I am seated across from another male, a Blue Pearl event (Merkaba portal) blocks my left eye’s field of vision (though not entirely) as in real life. However, this does not activate my memory (likely as it is just a rendered dream event and the Merkaba portal only appears in full wakeful consciousness). The other male had been aware of seeing the “blue flame” around me and seems somewhat surprised. “Did you see that?” I ask him and he nods.

A little later, I try to “call” it but nothing happens other than a light blue veil-like impression in my left eye that quickly disperses. That is, it is very subtle and does not come “closer” or briefly flash and darken before fading. I end up trying over about twenty minutes in about three locations where other people are around. A couple people think I am jesting and make jokes about other colors such as yellow. One even pushes me near the shoulder (though lightly in a friendly manner). I am somewhat frustrated I cannot call back the Source for whatever reason, though I have no focused intent on why - just the idea of the appearance and not how I would relate to it. (Although there is information about “Metatron’s Cube” I have only ever seen the star tetrahedron that forms the blue portal when the normal and inverted pyramids come together and rotate in opposite directions, although my wife had drawn variations on it in her journal during her childhood and early teen years, along with, of course, the opossum under the airplane and hundreds of other remote-viewed confirmations.)

There is one scene where a male is kneeling on the floor and seemingly doing some sort of occult ritual against another person (which I assume is metaphorical of people connected to the Source being manipulated by “normal” people and their false views of life). I immediately mumble some Latin (though I am not sure of the phrase; part of it was something like “dimittam”) and the implied villain falls over and is unable to move and the other person goes on his way.

From here, I hear people talking about how the bus is late. I go out and see (on the other side of the street from the post office) two different buses, though there is another one on the post office side. The bus I have to get, second one across the street (facing southward) does not have a driver, as he seems to be involved in a fight - not a violent or physical fight but chasing someone from the area for some reason. The area north of the post office (on the side of the street I am on) is modeled fairly accurately after the bus stop area of the Chermside Shopping Center that was several blocks away when we lived on Stadcor Street, but this does not dawn on me. (Thus, once again, Australian and American settings join in an in-dream composite rendering.)

I am feeling inside my right pocket for change and can clearly feel the coins (of which there are about seven of various denominations) and try to determine what they are by feeling the size - and reflect that there is at least about a dollar, though I am somewhat concerned if I have enough money for the bus (though I am not sure what the fee is), though I do not even reflect on what my destination is. My dream fades from around this point (before I get to the bus). It is possible, though not certain, that “trying to determine the denomination of a coin by feeling it” has something to do with a focus on trying to relate (blindly) to other people’s religions without really knowing at all what they mean, as “denomination” can also be defined as “a recognized autonomous branch of the Christian Church”.



Although I do not typically document it online as it is almost continuous (and is sometimes so precise, it would almost make my dream extraneous by description - and who wants an extraneous dream journal), yet again a dream utilizes something my wife had been thinking (without her saying anything to me) or a detailed subject of something she and our oldest daughter had talked about (without any way of me knowing about it - unless there is some sort of invisible intercom on my computer desk that relays the information - a bit of dry humor). She and our daughter were talking about the “blue moon” last night (of which I did not know anything about otherwise).

At the same time, it is also precognitive of something I see immediately after waking (also typical from day to day). In this case, it was a rather idiotic local article called “‘Blue moon’ doesn’t mean the moon is actually blue” and seemed almost like a humorous “continuation” of a couple in-dream concepts (from others in the post office).

From a disembodied perspective, I'm watching my IRL self. He's looking for something in this room, currently looking at an illustration of Loki hanging on a wall. The disembodied version of me is curious about the IRL version of me, and I've set up this space in order to observe his reactions. There'd been some previous incident where he'd taken on a sort of ritualized trickster role and unintentionally drawn my interest; he's not aware of me. (Though trickster's not the word I would have used in the dream and it kind of irritates me to use it now, but it's the best way to put it - a sense of something in common between the Loki illustration, the devil statue, my disembodied perspective, and the role my IRL self had played.) I've just now come to the conclusion that the thing that originally grabbed my interest had to do with taking on different roles rather than something inherent to him. This doesn't make me any less curious, but it alters the situation. He's now looking at a small black and white sculpture of the devil, and I switch to his perspective while he's holding it.

As my IRL self, I'm interrupted by the arrival of several IRL people. Eventually I wind up standing over a large pot with one of the women, and she's stirring whatever's in it. She calls me by the wrong name, and I correct her, annoyed. She repeats my real name, and makes a promise involving it, talking about dire consequences for anyone who violates this promise. Afterwards she describes the pot as holding the curse she's just spoken.

Now that my extensive travels (Paris, Rome, Montreal, Montana) of this month have ended, and I'm back home and gradually returning to my normal sleep patterns, I find that dream awareness is stirring again, though so far it falls short of full lucidity. I had no trace of it while on my journeys, and I didn't even have any dreams I judged worth writing down. This was not overly disappointing because I was not actively engaged in any kind of dream practice and too busy to spend an hour updating my dream journal every day, so it felt okay to take a break.

A couple days ago I had a dream that was atmospheric but not very interesting plotwise, so I didn't write it down at the time. However, one detail is notable: there was a giant white USB cord on the ground, at least twenty feet long, and arbitrarily I found myself wondering if I could bring it to life. I focused my attention on it and sure enough, it raised its "head" (the USB plug) and began to slither and writhe like a snake. This gave me an eerie sensation, because I found myself thinking, "This better not be happening in real life!" I decided I'd better check to see if I was dreaming. I levitated and was relieved to conclude that yes, indeed I was. However, true lucidity did not emerge because even though I now knew that I was dreaming, I did not stop and think what I could do with the dream state but unreflectively continued to go along with the dream events, which largely involved trying to take a good photograph of a distant landscape. It was a classic case of awareness without agency.

Last night's dreaming included one of my classic dream signs, a public restroom of questionable functionality. Although I did not recognize the dream sign, I did find myself wondering if the facilities would be clean enough to use. Then I remembered, "I can keep them clean and functional by maintaining the right mental attitude." Though I fell short of actual dream awareness, I still recognized the causal link between my will and the surrounding environment.

I find it interesting that, though I have still not done any sort of LD practice since early in the month when I left on my travels, simply returning home and restoring my ordinary sleep schedule has been enough to reawaken the potential for dream awareness that felt very distant while I was on the road.