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I'm inside a mental simulation of a memory from my past, allowing two people to go through the contents of my memory, a man and a woman. I'm lying down on the bed while the woman goes into the next room to look around.

Will Graham standing in a room, alone, but with mental images of many people moving around, he's piecing together what happened here in the past. He's watching the phantom images move, but he's mostly thinking about Hannibal and the increasing inevitability of consulting him on this case. This whole image is replaced by written words in white: "The Kingdom".

I'm a man who's been doing research into my own unknown ancestry, and turned up some info that my father was a cult leader. And while my mother's still a mystery, I'm complaining to someone that at this rate she'll probably turn out to be a goat. It's a reference to an image of goat-headed Baphomet that was connected to the cult.

(Woke up. Back to sleep.)

I'm watching three women try to recreate images from old photos of other people, dressing up like them and trying to copy their poses exactly, in order to figure out something that happened in the past, something about a girl with some sense of guilt towards another woman. Copying the photos requires one of the women to adopt some really uncomfortable looking poses, she's dressed up in a wedding gown and the angle she's holding her neck at looks like it should be fatal.

There's this guy who killed someone, and I told him over the phone 'I'm not going to come for you' unless he does something about the body himself. When I get there, I look out the back window into his yard, and see a few of those big black trash bags full of fallen leaves, and I note that there are a couple more bags now than were there when I left. I note that he split it up into several bags instead of just one.

I'm in the yard of some huge mansion with a few white tables and chairs set up for a party, abandoned now; I'm out at the very edge of the yard, near a river, standing over someone who's been shot, and I'm saying to Hannibal, "One person, you could have saved one person!" He says something disagreeing with me. I'm thinking about Abigail.

I'm standing in my IRL shower, and there's a spider in here, well out of the way of the water; but I accidentally drip some on it and it slips down into the tub, gets caught in the water and washed down the drain before I can catch it. I feel guilt about that. I didn't want to drown it. But then an insect crawls up out of the drain - a huge winged ant, and then another one - and I feel sure the spider will be able to make it back up too.

(Woke up. Back to sleep.)

I'm meeting some people in a dream. A woman and I have just arrived on a beach, bright sunny day, clear blue-green water, and we've got these dark fragments of void-stuff hanging around us from our arrival, dissipating like smoke. She's telling me about the guy she's going to introduce me to, who's supposed to guide me through something specific. He appears in a puff of darkness like we did, but standing on the water a little bit away, dark-haired guy wearing a suit, and he jogs across the water to meet us on the sand. He apologizes for taking so long to get here, and I'm thinking to myself that it only took him so long because he's accepting limitations that are unnecessary in a dream, not really a promising start. I expect him to say something else but he doesn't, they've both gone silent and stopped moving, and I realize that we've lost the connection and I'm waking up.

I had just woken up for school, and there was an unknown black female in the room, about my age. We were talking but we heard a horn beep out front. We looked and it was her mom. Now, we had to get her out without my dad noticing, but that was going to be hard. But, my dad and my brother Erin started arguing over some missing socks, and I used that distraction to sneak her out. On the way out, I got a random image of Charlie and Dennis from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia: Charlie pointed out some soap power (I believe) and said it looked nice. Dennis says "That's how they get you, thats how the corporations trick you into buying their product, with fancy advertising!" They then began to argue, but I woke up with no memory of the rest of the conversation.

Date: 28 Sept

WBTB: Gingko

LD: I walk towards a tram station, few classmates are here as well. I am looking for some items, there seems to be an open air store with products piled all around. I think about my plans to ld. Mom is also here. As I look straight ahead, I realize that I am already dreaming. I remember my goal AF and quickly head in an unknown direction, but then remind myself to stop rushing and take some time to look around.

It is early in the evening and there is a full moon, normal size. As I pass the corner, thinking about AF a fountain structure appears, it has something Greek/classical to it, I think "Poseidon"? There are some statues (don't pay attention of what) and water is randomly sprinkling from them. I want to build AF here and now, using whatever water material is available, so I go closer to the structure. I am wearing sport pants that are sliding down my feet, making it hard to move. I wonder if I should take them off, but remember this is a bad idea and do my best to make them disappear by ignoring them, then continue moving forward without problems. The nearby fountain has a small section with very attractive water and ice surrounding it. I have the strong desire to get in the ice cold water and enjoy the feel of it. It's an amazing feeling but the dream fades and I wake up.

Mini-ld: I appear in a store and recognize this is a dream. I shortly stare at some prices and erase the ink with my hand. There are tons of winter clothes on me and I feel very uncomfortable. Of course, I start taking them off until I am wearing a T-shirt and feel much better.

I go out and notice a guy sitting in this street cafe. The dream starts to destabilize, so I join him and tell him I need his help with stabilization. I hold his small child-like hands and examine them. I quickly think of AF and look at a nearby building and there is building waterfall (i.e. water falling from the building instead of rocks). That looks reassuring and I want to go there, but the dream fades.

I wake up, somewhat later and without much involvement on my part I DEILD to the same dream.

Mini-deild: I am looking at the face of the same DC and wonder about the whole dream resuming like this. I caress his face and kiss him on the cheeks as a stabilization tech, but the dream doesn't last long and I wake up.

NON-DREAM
DREAM
LUCID

My mom and I are under the dinner table, and there is a wading pool that comes up to my thighs. Further "underground", there is another pool, only this one is deeper. My mom is trying to coax me into going into the deeper one, but I'm too afraid. I breifly recall another dream that was similar to this, but I don't go fully lucid.


This is an example of a dream that is somewhat common for me: remembering dreams that never were. I will be in a dream, and then I'll be like "Hey! I remember this!" despite the fact that this is the first I've ever dreamed of it.

Morning of October 6, 2013. Sunday.

Dream #: 17,093-01. Reading time (optimized): 3 min. Readability score: 67.



American actor Russell Johnson appears about halfway into my dream as in his role as Professor Roy Hinkley on the American sitcom “Gilligan’s Island.” However, his essence seems closer to home as a local teacher or professor. I am not surprised by his presence.

---

My dream takes place mostly in the living room of the Cubitis house (where I have not lived since 1978). My wife Zsuzsanna is in the first part of my dream in my old bedroom in the semidarkness (though she has never been to America). In the living room is a gathering of about ten cane toads. One of them, facing towards the south and underneath a larger metallic table (one my family owned in real life), seems to be aggressive to one of the others. The “mean” toad’s coloring is different, with a darker head than body. Another cane toad is facing him. The one with the darker head is slightly bigger. A fluid is spraying upward in a light but steady narrow stream and arcing down upon the other cane toad. It is a vivid image which I watch for at least a minute or two. The other toad does not seem to retaliate in any way.

Later, the professor is in the house, casually entering on his own via the front door, wanting to study the cane toads. I tell him about the seeming victimization of the toad. I go over to see that all that remains of it is a rectangular purse-like shell of tough skin with no head or legs, with top and bottom sections of the outer layer only. There is a vague association of a toad-skin coin purse, though also vaguely reminiscent of warped plastic-coated playing cards. There is also fluid coming out of the two pieces. Professor Hinkley studies them but I warn him about the toxic fluid, and he develops a minor burn on his hand from some fluid that leaks out. He seems very cheerful and shows interest in the events regarding the cane toads. He shows no sign of concern.

Later, Professor Hinkley and I notice that the other toad is near the front door and is starting to spray upward at us. I have to float, hover, and rise in the air until I am near the ceiling and out of its range. Professor Hinkley walks to different areas of the room and does not attempt to float. The cane toad, with its “fountain of venom” mouth, cannot reach me, but I am still annoyed at having to hover in the air and maneuver near the ceiling, though without much of a focus on physicality regarding weight or gravity, though the feeling is otherwise very vivid and realistic. My dream eventually fades at this point.

---

I revised this entry on Tuesday, 16 October 2018, using my new readability software. I have added “telepathic dream” due to it being the probable cause behind the event relating to Russell Johnson’s death from kidney failure on January 14, 2014. There were too many clues in my dream for it to be coincidental despite (or perhaps because of) the mundane correlations. I had not heard anything about him or his health, though he would likely have been at least subliminally aware of it. The other threads that seemed precognitive may be a result of extrasensory awareness.

---

There may be a subliminal association of “Professor Hinkley” with “Hinkler Central,” the nearby shopping mall. Recently, Zsuzsanna waited two hours to get the last wildlife card to complete the collection for our children, though another member of the public that had just entered the building went up and got the card immediately as it was suddenly available. (They requested an additional one, but there were none.) We also saw a cane toad in our yard.

My dream had precognitive threads. There is now a leak from the bathroom faucet. It is hard to fix because the cabinet is at a slight slope. When it is off, it is not flat, allowing water to flow past the new part (which I bought at Hinkler Central) and where it should be closed off. It might have worked if it had been flexible enough to cover the angle of the hole.

Also in my dream, Zsuzsanna had a concern about a big bug high on the wall. Afterward, something similar happened, and it turned out to be a big cricket that had gotten into our house.

---

I explain this dream type further in “Dreams of Type PRECONAV-VSCPCEL, 01-15”.

---

If can't sleep for 30 minutes, get up, go to another room, do somethin quiet, come back to bed only when fleeling sleepy.

Do not eat, read, watch TV, in bed. Only for sleep.

Go to bed at same time of day every day. And get up at same time every day.

Avoid naps.

Morning exercise is best. No closer to bed than 3 hours before.
Establish bedtime routine (warm drink, shower, short read, meditation)
Yoga/meditation/relaxation before bed.
Melatonin/Valerian. Melatonin should be cheap. Valerian can be taken every 4 hours.
Eat small bedtime snack: complex carbs, small bit of protein w/tryptophan and calcium. Avoid sugary, all carbs snack.
Calcium helps brain use tryptophan to manufacture melatonin!!!
Low sugar dairy products. Nuts. peanuts with skins, whole almonds (for more fiber), walnuts, pecans, sunflower and pumpkin seeds, pistachios, red peanuts with skins
Ground flax seeds is a big source of tryptophan.
The best bedtime snack is one that has both complex carbohydrates and protein, and perhaps some calcium
For dinner and bedtime snacks, eat a meal or snack that is high in complex carbohydrates, with a small amount of protein that contains just enough tryptophan to relax the brain
Stop working on any task an hour before bedtime to calm your brain.
Don't discuss emotional issues right before bedtime.
Avoid large meals two hours before bedtime. A light snack is fine
Valerian becomes more effective over time, so it's best to take it every night for a short period of time. Start with the lowest dose, then increase over several days' time. Valerian is considered safe to take for four to six weeks.
eat bananas, avocado, peanuts, almonds, figs, and milk-based drinks, all containing tryptophans, a precursor for creating melatonin which regulates sleep.[2] Some snacks to consider include: cookies and milk, sliced banana with chopped dates, and wholegrain bread with lettuce
Plain nonfat yogurt for best calcium. Then cheese, milk,

Dream recall from today's WBTB/naps.

Dream 1(fragments):

I was at home and i was trying to visualize something(in dream) and i ended up seeing scene in hills with a waterfall and a dragon flying.

Dream 2:

I wake up at home and get distracted by loud deconstruction noises and explosions outside, i was wondering what's going on and then noticed that my bed is in different room, but i woke up before realizing.

Dream 3(fragments):

There was some wrestling match/fight going on and then dragons started appearing, one of which had blue scales.

1. I was watching the dream and saw a boy and girl go through into a secret passage to have sex. I was I intrigued about this passage so used a small microphone to track their voices and find the passage. Then the boys dad rushed past me saying something about saving his son. I take it the girl wasn't too nice. I saw into the passage and it lead out into a room with sofas, a small fridge but was missing a bed, so I made a bed appear.

2. I was in a room, in it was a table and people sat around it. I kept wanting to tell them about the film I'd just seen but they wanted to work so I just sat by and watched them. It's only after the dream I now realize that the people sat round the table were actually the people in the film.

3. I was in some kind of castle, but I'd been here before and wanted the toilet. So off I went down the long winding corridors and eventually through a door that said 'toilets' on it. However on the other side was a huge cave. Walking further into it I found a path and shortly after a group of friends and my brother found me. Was walked to the end and found a chest full of treasure. But we were being attacked so me and my brother fought off these demons and a miniature slender man. The dream ended with us still fighting.

5:35am
So I "remember" I got lucid briefly, but I do not now remember that dream nor how I got lucid. Maybe there was a lucid or maybe this part is a false memory and this dream was all about the non lucid false awakening? And e more I think about it the more likely I think that is because I really remember nothing about that lucid, so I think this was a false awakening with a lost false memory of a non existing lucid most likely.

I remember "waking up" and taking my iPad to the couch to write down my dream. notice I failed to RC upon waking up, argh! And almost did that again a moment ago, but remembered now.

So there I was about to write my dream down on iPad and I had huge trouble closing down the game app that was there.

This game up was loud, so it woke up almost everyone else, including a visitor staying over at our home. In waking life we have no such visitor and in fact do not know him, but I did not notice that in the dream. He was a boy, older than my sons, but not a teen yet. He was Asian perhaps Chinese American. Very polite. He came to me, and wanted to know if he could play games on my iPad. I said, no, I am using it, and got to write down my lucid dream before I forget. He accepted that and left. My husband briefly came too.

I started to have doubts, and thought that it was inhospitable of me to not let the guest have the iPad. and besides I was having trouble operating it. I rationalized that by thinking I must have upgraded the operating system alas. (I should have realized that this was a clue, and reality checked, but I did not!)

The visitor was in the bathroom, so I was going to prop my iPad on the floor next to the bathroom, so he could see it when he emerged. And that's when he emerged. It was a bit awkward with me still bent down to the floor. I told him, I changed my mind and would let him play. I said that the rules of using the iPad were that he needed to only do stuff on it that his parents would approve, follow his parents rules for electronic device usage. In my dream I think there was a second rule, but I forgot what it was. He politely thanked me.

So I went to the bedroom to write down my dream on my iPhone instead. y husband grumbled that I had to hurry up, there was not much time. I realized I had forgotten my lucid dream! Although I remembered that there wasn't much to it, just became lucid and woke up, but I wanted to remember what happened before that!

And that's when I actually woke up.

7:35am More fragments/dreams - later in the morning, but no awareness

I attended some sort of birthday party at someone I considered a neighbor in the dream. there was a pond. I noticed some dead fish, so I suggested that my almost 5 year old help pick up the dead fish and a banana and put them in a trash bag. I remember there were some amazing creatures in this pond, including a Betta fish that gracefully glided on top of the water surface and then transformed into a human and walked on the surface of the water. the neighbor got upset with my family for something, don't remember what, and for a while we feared revenge, but then he forgave us. I think especially one family member it was not certain whether he would forgive, but he did.

my boss and me and a few others were planning to do a job interview, and those who had arranged the interview (some strangers) were saying that maybe my boss would not like the person interviewed, They said it in another language that my boss could not understand, but I could. They said that he might no approve of this person because this person was overweight and American, and while they thought my boss might forgive obesity in a foreigner but not in an American. Meanwhile my boss only understood his name and demanded a translation. I told them they might as well translate or else I would tell him what they had said after they were gone.

I was in the lunchroom with some friends, and Cas from Supernatural joined us. We were all trying to play it cool, but silently freaked out among ourselves and fawned over his adorableness as he sat down and tried to figure out how lunchrooms work. I got up to get a drink, and when I came back to the table, he was gone. One of my friends, Sarah I think, got his phone number, and we kept calling it to hear his weird voice-mail greeting. But when I tried to enter his number into my contacts, my phone's auto-correct kept changing his name and wouldn't let me fix it, so I wasn't able to save his number. We left the lunchroom and went to class, and I sat down at a desk near the back. The teacher gave us some kind of math quiz, that had word questions about how long it took to travel from one place to another place. The questions were worded like "A plane leaves Las Vegas at 5pm and arrives in New York at 9pm, how long did it take to get there?" which is obviously easy to answer, but the teacher demanded we answer the questions a certain way that involved looking up the distance between the two cities and the average speed of the airplane and using that to find the answer instead of just counting the hours between 5 and 9. I was upset and I thought I failed the quiz because I didn't understand his confusing way to answer.

Cory and I went shopping at a bookstore. He was off in the sci-fi section, and I wandered into the new age aisle and was looking at the tarot decks they had for sale. I don't remember what happened after that, but later we were both out on a porch that was covered in vines, and we were watching episodes of King of the Hill. The TV we were watching was interactive, and it would occasionally pause and show a black screen with white text. It would ask what we would like to see happen in the episode next, and give us multiple choices.

My family was visiting my dad and step mother, but we were staying next door in some sort of rental. I did not notice that neither their home nor neighborhood were anything like they actually are.

My husband and sons and dad and step mother were going to go somewhere in a car, but I was not going. I was helping them to the car, carrying a booster seat for my almost 5 year old. I did not notice that the booster seat was a way more elaborate contraption than in reality. But suddenly they were gone, and I did not remember them having left, and I was left with the booster seat.

i did the finger through palm reality check, but it failed. Instead of seriously questioning reality or following up with another reality check, I started rationalizing that something must be mentally wrong with me, that I must not have long to live. I tried calling my dad on my cell phone, but he did not answer. I rationalized further that they must have had another booster seat in the car, and maybe the one I was carrying was not needed. I did not notice that the booster seat then disappeared.

I then tried finding the place where we were staying, but could not. The neighborhood was nothing like what I "remembered" it being - both not matching reality and not matching false memories. It in fact became a more and more elaborate neighborhood, the longer I walked. It was like a small tourist town with shops. I heard some tourist comment, how quaint it was, that they had no clue this charming town was there, that they needed to explore it more. I heard someone laugh.

I meanwhile was panicking more and more, and doubting my sanity. i did more reality checking. Again just the finger through palm attempt, but again without serious questioning, and again it failed. However, by then I was too panicked to stop and think. I tried calling my dad again and my husband in vain. I was crying, and thinking that this can't be happening to me.

And that's when I woke up, and realized that it was not happening to me. And that I checked reality repeatedly in this dream, but did not seriously question it, even though the reason I checked was because stuff was happening that should not be happening! Soooo close, and yet sooo far.

In my work I found out that entry level people do more complex work than I do (not true), and I suggested that from now on I should be involved when they are getting their assignments to see who is more appropriate for a task. It was not that they were doing a poor job alas, but rather i felt inadequate, like i should be doing more complex work than them. I also found out that someone in another team, who in my dream was a retirement age biologist (but in waking life is not), I found out that he knows a lot about creating charts and that we could learn from him, but that he alas is retiring now so we can't. He was leaving and I felt deep respect for him, and had the sense it was mutual. In waking life I know almost nothing about this man other than he works on the same floor as I do, and is much younger than in my dream.

My younger son was lost. My mother called, but I said I could not talk and hung up on her without explaining why. I was combing the streets shouting his name when suddenly my husband appeared with my son. my husband was supposed to take a flight somewhere, and apparently our son tried to stowaway in the luggage and come with him, but was discovered at the airport. I was so relieved to see him.

Saturday, 10/5/13

Last night bed around 1am - 9am

DR
Long house right on the edge of the ocean, so it was right under the windows. I was there on some kind of a retreat.

I'm asking them to show me my bedroom. They take me through many rooms to my room. Very next room to mine is dark. It feel different, older than rest of the modern building. Like couple hundred years older. Walls are black, almost as in a coal mine. There is only on light source, a bare lightboulb on the ceiling, giving out yellow light. There is a door in the wall, also black.

I don't like the feel of this room. I learn, that that's the place for mentally ill.

I'm talking to someone. I'm saying "if I knew this is that type of a retreat, where they don't let you have cookies, I would have never come" "It's ok to not have cookies all the time, byt if I feel like having one, it's really damaging not to have it". Then I comment, that I have seen my name on the list on the bathroom door, that "im on duty from 00:00 to 00:45. I guess it meant I'm on cleaning duty.

I took a nap at 10:48. I fell asleep with yoga nidra. I was fine and ready for a WILD after just a few minutes, but didn't wanna move to shut it down. So I just fell asleep.

Second nap after 8pm.
DR - I'm being followed by assasins. I get to the river and throw all my close in it. I thought they were following me with a bug in my clothes. So I made a mental note of allways getting naked when being followed.

I made my way back to the house, through some parking lot or indistrial lot. I think I blew up their car by blowing up some nearby crates. (playing Killzone IWL)

Now I'm in my house. It's already dark outside and I'm peeking through the blinds and I think I see two shadows of these assasins. But I'm not worried anymore.

WILD - I law down for a nap on a sofa same way I'm in WL at that moment. I wake up and I think I hear some sound. I put my hand down and pet my cat. Then I'm trying to stand up. I can lift my legs and arms, but not the body. So I stick them out straight in the air in hopes of my body following. ( I think this was all HH, not for real)

I finally get out of my body. I can't see. I try to wipe my eyes, but it's not working. I can't open them either. So I start telling myself "I can see". I start seeing some ligher grey. I move to the window while telling myself "It's nice and sunny outside and I can see that". Then the corner of a window got really bright with sunlight and I could see outside throught that opening. Rest of it was still fogged up.

I got out and it was a beautiful sunny day. I was hovering maybe 15 feet off the ground and I was convinced that I'm a ghost. Because I saw the streets the same way as they are in WL. At least that's what I thought. Because It was some completely strange place. It had a feel of a small town. So to prove myself that I'm a ghost in RTZ - real time zone, astral projecting, I read the sign on a restaurant I passed by earlier. Yup, it matches, I'm APing.

I figuered a scare someone. I see a grey minivan turning the corner on the street, coming towards me. There is a chef sitting there. I could tell by his tall, white chef's hat. But I called him "baker". I flew after his van, wanted to get in and scare him. But he was too fast. (I have no clue why I would wanna do that, since IWL, I would never wanna scare somebody)

I'm flying back towards the town center, looking for DCs. Here I lose it,

DEILD - I'm back on my dream sofa, waiting for sensations again to WILD. They come and now I'm flying through space. I wish I would see something beautiful and some structures do show up, and they are gorgeous. And some more, and more. I almost cry, it's so pretty.

DEILD - I lose it again, and I'm back on my dream sofa. I wait for sensations and help by pushing my head backwards. I get out, and now I'm flying over the ocean, but the shore comes up and I wish there was more water. So I'm over ocean again and 'm thinking of diving into it. There are some huge storms gathering and I'm thinking if it's a good idea. Then I see a huge shark jumping up of the water alongside the boat I'm on. He continues flying higher and he is a greenish motorboat. Another shark comes by and weather is turning really bad.

DJ Entry:
I was at Woodward West Camp (as usual) and was filming a highly renowned rollerblader named Alex Broskow, except instead of skating the parks he wanted to make an 'off road' edit, where I would film him doing tricks as he skated down a mellow hill of grass. We began filming, and I was using a large 3CCD camcorder with a Raynox fisheye, and he was holding a Canon HDSLR with a Tamron 17-50mm and told me that he'd rather have the 3CCD camera so we switched. I started filming him doing tricks, and that was about all I can remember.

October 5 2013 - ~11:00pm to ~9:00am, woke up at ~1:30am and ~4:45am

Fragments:
I woke up at 5 to try WBTB (Actually did this in real life, but the rest was a dream)
Mom had this app that let her know when someone connected to the wifi
I had turned my light on just for a moment but she/dad noticed
She was like 'wanderingoak's using the internet that early' etc
I tried leaving to tell her that that wasn't true, and that evernote automatically syncs, but I couldn't speak, so I decided to tell her in the morning
---
Imitation of an old man teaching
Lego game with magnetic walls
Superhero vs superhero/villain, one on one
---
Half-human, half robot
man with wife and children was normal from the waist up but his ribs/organs/? were exposed from the waist down
He wore a blue dress into the water, was supposed to count to three and go back up, but didn't, and drowned
(Wife - black haired - was trying to kiss him on the shoulder underwater but then that happened)
Children had something to do with a white towel, a cheese grinder, etc