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I was riding the train with some friends. There was a man wearing a dress on the train, and some other guys were trying to start a fight with him. There provocation succeeded, and a full brawl began. The man in the dress turned out to be deceptively strong. Things were getting out of hand, so I pressed the security button. By the time security arrived, the man in the dress had pretty much wiped the floor with all of them.

My friends and I made our way to a bar, which turned out to be a strip club. My parents were there, taking in a poll dance. Gross. We proceeded to get rather drunk, and then I decided I wanted to leave. Worried about my safety, my friends decided that one of them needed to accompany me home. One of my oldest friends agreed to walk me. When we arrived at my house, we ended up sleeping together for some reason. It was weird and instantly regrettable. I kept asking myself why I had done this; cheated on my boyfriend, ruined my friendship with this person, and probably ruined a few other friendships too. (I was super relieved to wake up and realize that it had only been a dream).

Disgusted with myself, I jumped in my truck and drove away. I was trying to drive south, but I kept missing the exits on the highway and kept driving completely the wrong way. I eventually turned off and ended up in some ritzy town-house area. Then I woke up.

11/22/11

I am inside the game of Oblivion. I am walking through a forest, just randomly exploring to see what I can find to do. Maybe I'll stumble across a quest or something, or a place I haven't been before. I think I should have armor and weapons… why don't I? Well, I'll just have to find it around. Use magic until I get a sword. I throw a fireball just to be sure that ability is working, and it is working fine. So I continue exploring and finally I come across a cave partially hidden in the tall grass. Perfect, I'll explore in there. I go into the cave and pause while my eyes adapt to the darkness. The first thing I find is a skeleton on the ground. I wonder how long that guy's been here. I take the armor and sword and shield off the skeleton. It is leather armor and shield, a long sword that looks pretty standard. I pause, thinking I don't remember things being quite this realistic when I take armor and put it on in Oblivion, but I finally brush that off and put the armor on.

I take the sword and proceed farther into the cave. A bandit announces his presence by asking who the fuck I am, then he attacks. I block with my shield and return the attack. The fight is a short one, ending with my blade through his chest. His last words are to make sure I know he thinks I am a fucking bitch. I see light ahead in the cave and approach it. When I look into the chamber beyond I see there are two more bandits in the cave… a man and a woman… and there is a man in an area of the cave closed in with bars like a prison. The man is over at the bars yelling at the prisoner, it sounds like he wants to get some kind of information from the prisoner. The prisoner is refusing to talk. The bandit is eating a large turkey leg, and he takes a large bite. He waves the meat in the prisoner's face. He said if the prisoner doesn't talk, he doesn't eat. Watching the prisoner starve to death could be amusing… but just tell them what they want to know and he can have a share of their food and be on his way. The prisoner says he doesn't believe that, as soon as he talks they'll kill him, so he's not saying. The bandit calls the prisoner a stubborn piece of shit and turns away… and right towards me.

This bandit sounds just like the other one… greeting me with a "Who the fuck are you?" The woman, who has been watching the prisoner up until now, turns around and also sees me. She says if I came to rescue the old man I had made my first big mistake… which was thinking he was worth saving. And my next big mistake was coming here alone. And my third and final big mistake would be not running away right now. The man is muttering something about an incompetent partner… the woman attacks me with magic. She throws fireballs at me, I send them back at her with Whiplash. I tell her she'll have to do better than that. She summons lightning, I take control of it with Battery and focus the power into my sword. I now have an electric sword. The other bandit finally stopped muttering expletives and he attacks me. His sword clashes with mine, metal to metal… and the electricity flows into him, electrocuting him. Cool effect! The woman continues attacking me, throwing more fire. I use the song spell Battery on her and hit her with a bolt of lightning directly, she is burned by the heat and dies. Now to collect loot. I take all of the loot off the fallen bandits… armor, weapons, other assorted loot to include an amulet from the woman and a couple health potions from the man. I find a chest and open it to find some jewels in it. I take all the loot and put it in some unseen inventory… in an interdimensional pocket? Hammer space? Up my ass? The prisoner is calling me, asking me to please let him out. Cool it, I'm getting to that. I unlock the cell door with a key I found on the male bandit and open it. He says just because I rescued him doesn't mean he can tell me anything, but if I come back with him, the elder may share the secret with me. The secret is not his to share. This sounds interesting, so I say I'll come, but then I wake up.

I wake up in my bed, decide to nose plug RC I can breathe!
I get up out of bed, walk out of my room, its still really dark, I float down the stairs, my dad is slumped at the bottom, against my front-door. He mumbles something to me as i pass him, i ignore him and carry on.

I walk through my living room to the doors that lead to my garden, when i reach them i start punching the glass in the door, it doesn't break and i can feel my hand connect, i try again, harder and harder but still nothing happens. I give up and just open the door to walk outside, its light out now, i walk down the patio section and try to fly, i manage to float a few metres forward but thats all. I'm determined to fly so i start jumping hoping that i will get higher and higher, but i don't. I decide i want a fight and see my mother appear from my bedroom window at the top of the house. She looks stern and angry (which is just NOT like her) She throws a small brownish like box at me from the window, i raise my hand and stop the box in mid-air with TK and send it flying back at her. She disappears from the window so i try to bring the entire side of the house down with TK, i manage to make it shake and dust and steam flies out of the top but other than that, nothing happens. My mum comes out of the double doors that i just used and steps onto the patio, sword in hand. I need to find a weapon and reach into my pockets, after a few seconds of feeling around i can feel a sword-hilt, i take it out. The sword is very small, but its all i got.

We start to fight with the swords, faster and faster, until they are just a blur and i wonder how i can keep up with this. Then i start to hear noises, screams and shouts, from a few gardens down, they don't sound bad, they sound like a few people having fun. "enough of this, i want to go over there, it sounds like fun" my mum walks back inside while i walk to the end of my garden, listening to the noises.

I wake up in my bed, but its outside in my garden, its daytime and i get up and walk towards my house, on the way i find a huge sword, laying on the grass but cant make sense of it.

I wake up for real.

7/7/2011
I'm at my old house.

It's daytime. I see a llama or something through the storm door. It looks dead, and there are baby ones mewling nearby. But then the llama-thing gets up and makes itself look like a giant cobra, hissing at the nearby real cobra. The real cobra tries to slither under the door, but I chop off its head.

It's nighttime. I'm fiddling with decorations. They are the painted glass ornament kind. My mom made stew. There is too much, and she is struggling to put it all away. My dad helps.

I'm trying to back the van down the driveway, but the brakes aren't working. I barely manage to avoid hitting the car in the driveway on the other side of the street by switching gears to reverse (forward?) and stepping on the gas. Two kids I knew from my church when I was in high school are on the other side of the street, wanting to try that out with their car. I ask to see some license, and wow, they actually are that old. They try it out.

I'm watching through the window. Several cars are coming and going. They go to/through the neighbor's backyard. My brother M leaves in a car and no one else notices.

7/4/2011
I'm controlling four protagonists in a video game. I'm searching through a dungeon to find items, which I find. The final boss appears. I panic and realize I've forgotten the controls. I wing it. The boss has four weaknesses. I must decipher each. They're written in code, and the game won't pause so I can look it up. The first one is lilac. I'm running and dodging through rocks, now through a theater. I find a lilac bomb and use it. Now I have to figure out the second weakness.

I have a false awakening and am working on trying to remember my dream. Then I actually wake up. But I fall back asleep. Er. Probably.

I'm in the garage of my old house, fetching something from the freezer. My mom wants tomato. I cut one up for her, but she isn't happy with it. Something about cutting onions and video games. The way M's mom cuts onions is weird, and I shouldn't do it that way.

7/1/2011
I am on a relatively small boat at sea. There is some sort of tv show or party going on. Penny (from the Big Bang Theory) is really drunk, and she kisses Sheldon and falls overboard. She is helped back on the boat. I fall overboard as well. I swim to the guy helping people back on board. He has some sort of huge tame fish, the size of a small whale. At the top of the boat, drunk people who fell overboard are being ?chained up?. Penny is livid. She blames Sheldon for manipulating her into the kiss.

Something is written on a white board. It seems clear and unchanging, if a bit weird, but the only word I remember is 'yucky.'

In a tomb/vault. A raider is talking to the guards and a fratboy. He does something with mixing white powder and runs away, up the ladder. He comes back a bit later and the three are dead. He enters the inner chamber. There is a stream or waterfall and some green stuff growing on rock.

A scene in a bathroom. There are beetles. My little brother (I have no little brother) loves collecting bugs and is mad at me for some reason.

I am trying to capture a bad guy in a theater. I am a fantasy character named Simon. I capture the bad guy and kill him, but it doesn't quite work. I have to fight/trick him again, and this time when I capture him I kill him for good. I think I am trying to protect a little girl. I feel guilty over something I don't remember and am explaining/apologizing to the girl.

There is a shop selling underwear (or diapers?) with stuff written on it, which has something to do with the fratboy.

6/30/2011
I'm pretty sure I wrote this one starting at the end and working backwards, but I didn't write down any indication of the order of events, so I haven't made any attempt to 'fix' the order to be chronological.

I am at some sort of beauty contest. One of the contestants is trans-gender. He has a picture of him looking like a beautiful woman years ago when he was younger, but he looks pretty male now. The judges aren't pleased. Me and four others vote for him to be able to participate. The stage catches on fire. The firemen may not be trying as hard as they ought to put it out. They fail.

Taking a bus to a contest. Something about mesas.

There is an evil guy with minions and a lady. She runs when she realizes what he is. He chases. He kills a couple of minions for not trying hard enough. The chase scene is very long. One of the minions runs the other way through a department store (it's night) and gets the bad man to chase him while the lady runs the other way. The minion is killed.

There is a group of misbehaving adolescents. They steal and run away to another town. They're trying to do something good, but they don't get away with it and have to return.

I'm fighting monsters in a labyrinth. My brothers are there. There is a safe-ish room/area. I microwave a burrito?

-Uppercut-

The Dream Begins And I'm In A Futuristic Locker Room. I Put On Some Sweat Pants And Walk Out.I'm Walking In A Straight Line With Other People From My School.I Hear Somebody Behind Me Saying How Crappy I Suck,And How I'm A Dousche Bag.In Anger I Turn Around Uppercut Him In The Jaw.It Felt So Good To Give Him What He Deserves. He Falls To The Floor And I'm Beating The Living Day Lights Out Of Him.After A Solid Beating That Lasted Awhile,I Get Up And Walk Off . Some Lady At A Table Says To Me,"You Done?" I Say ,"Yeah."She Then Says "Go Ahead And Go To The Principal's Office."

-End Of Dream-

6/28/2011
A rundown shack with a convenience store nearby. There is some kind of secret history. A baby the size of a couple of fingers is growing in a butter dish.

I am at my old house. I find some sort of secret space behind a broken mirror, but my flashlight isn't bright enough to explore it, so I leave, intending to come back later. I do my hair or something.

I'm in the backyard now. It's raining very heavily. There is a garden with spots for many things, but only a single cabbage and a couple other things are growing there. I am given a sheep named Jeanie. There is some sort of emergency. I call for Jeanie to come, but she won't, so I go inside without her.

In the kitchen, my brother M is explaining about our defenses, such as not having the kitchen blinds closed the wrong way so we can't see. Brigands break in. I fumble around desperately for a blade. I find a long, skinny blade with a too-small blue handle on my dresser. I clumsily block a couple of attacks by a brigand with my awkward sword and retreat into the back room. I close the door and open it again only to see Draco Malfoy attacking. I somehow manage to partially close the door at the right time so that he stabs the door instead of me and gets his sword stuck. I stab him in the shoulder. I am very proud of myself.

6/27/2011
I am at some sort of outdoor eatery. I am a secret agent or spy or something. There is a monastery and bones of a large animal or dinosaur. I? we? are resisting some sort of evil force in the city.

I am working for/with a king. I make a knife/dagger that has a bone handle with a sapphire in it.

I am in the dungeon or sewer underneath the palace/castle. I find some sort of portal to another dimension and go through it. I talked with many of the people there. On my way back out, I am in a strange chamber. It is flooding with lava or water. I find a strange statue and sit on it. I get some sort of hoverboard and use it to escape.

There is a usurper, protected by strange technology (a force field). We fight.

6/26/2011
I am at a boarding school. Chris (a friend I haven't seen in a couple years) is there. He and I have some sort of argument but remain friends.

It is winter and snowy. We are having dinner at a special house. There are chocolate peanut butter cups. A girl there wants to get back at a guy in chem class, for some reason. She bakes a cake that gives unusual confidence.

Chris and I are at my room. I try to find the dishes I need to return to the house and to remember what dish I left there.

There is a large lake, and a metal bridge with hand rails goes over it. The weather is very stormy, and the bridge is constantly swaying. Chris and I try to cross, but we reach a place where the bridge turns into just a pipe with a couple ropes to hold for support. There is a wide, circular area in the bridge just before it turns into a pipe. There are two thick vertical poles blocking access to the pipe. I can't fit through them and going around would risk a fall. I stop Chris from doing something reckless, and we give up and go back.

We eat some of that confidence giving cake from earlier. It is intoxicating. We head back to the lake, but it's a trick. There's a demon swimming in the water below. I don't ever get a clear view of it, but it has tentacles, and I know it's deadly. The witches are trying to trick us into falling in. They get paid if they lure people into the lake. The demon offers sacrifices to some sort of god. The cake is witch magic as well, but the girl who made that isn't in on this scheme. I had let Chris go on ahead without me earlier, and I hurry and catch up to him in time to warn him about the lake. We fight the witches. I find a jar of stored trinket/spell things. I throw handfuls of them at the witch, but only succeed in making her fly. I dump the rest of the trinket spell thingies in the lake, thus ruining all the hard work they put into making them.

We head back to the dorms, which are more like a ski lodge than actual dorms. There are theaters in the dorms, and I get lost in them on my way back. I find my way to the house of the vaguely parental character, who is male and has long blond hair. I throw some residual witch-stuff out a window. The parental-type character takes pictures of me in a photo shoot sort of manner. I suddenly realize I am naked* and try to hide it.

Out of order bits: Chris has my walkman and I have the headphones. I run off, but he doesn't let go of the walkman, so I just have the headphones. I return later and demand he give me the walkman and candy back. He does, but is offended. I vaguely remember being in some sort of tech store at some point.

* I don't mean literally naked, but that is the closest I can approximate what I mean without going into a bunch of details that I don't want to go into right now.

Odd Entertainment:
I was in an entertainment park, there were more people than in my average dreams but still less than in a real park. I was having fun on a stationary ride much like a wave swinger but going a lot higher, when the ride was over I just occasionally jumped the 40m down, someone apparently had a problem with me leaving the ride like that, but I told him to go se someone about it and wether anyone cares, so he just left me alone. In another part of that dream I was ridiculously hungry and I remember some unknown girl (maybe I was there with a group like a class etc.) buying some burgers for me but not finding me though I was always less than 20 meters around. She ended up throwing them away, turning around, seeing me and then running away crying. I was pretty annoyed at my potential free food and food wasted generally as well, not to mention I had no clue what was going on either. And went into one of the restauraints and tried to relax but some other people (probably out of this group) were making a ruckes and one of them poked me and got a threatening reaction from me. They gently left me alone for a moment and as I started to relax in the dream I woke up.

Bazillion years old:
I was outside, it was very cloudy and slightly dark already. Everything looked a bit blue due to the light. I had no clue were I was heading, the place looked remotely like my original town of birth but it was to much off, effectively leaving me not knowing were I was, just knowing I had some sort of target. Out of the grass this dude started to attack me, but I repelled him every single time, potentially injuring him all the time but while he couldn't do anything to me he wasn't eager to give up as well. He eventually told me how ridiculously old he was, something between 10^30 and 10^40 I think, the phrase alone was darn long. But I just tried to go on and kept on fending him off until the dream faded.

Devil Cat:
I was on some sort of huge wall, made out of stone and I could pretty much look down into the land. On the wall was a tower where I went up I think. The main part was about this cat, it was frustrated and told me that people were declaring it as some sort of devil (obviously meant in a negative way). I remember stroking the cat sometime afterwards, she was white with big black dots, and the black dots were a lot warmer than the white.

Dream 1:

I was picking someone up at my old high school, its weird because that's what i was doing today, picking my sister up at my old high school. So anyways I look around and lunch is over so people are going back to class. There's a group of kids going back and i walk in the crowd, i feel like I'm in high school again, and it feels good. I walk out, its a sunny day, and i go into this one parking lot and i see my ex girlfriend in some kind of hooded purple sweatshirt and jacket, she just looks away and pretends to ignore me as i pass her. I see my coworker Priscilla go to her car but I don't say hi to her. Then I notice my other ex girlfriend is sitting in the trunk of my car, (its a Honda pilot so its not weird to sit off the end, bc its a flat surface) and some random new boyfriend she has. I notice a stick figure made out of ribs someone ate in the windshield wiper of my car. I asked my ex thats sitting in the car if she did it, her boyfriend says he did it, so i start to beat the crap out of him then the dream ends.

Dream 2:

I am at this weird party in the woods and it looks like a halloween - esque party because there's seats made out of straw and barrels everywhere. It looks like its about sundown and it seems as if the forest has walls like in some old video games, one of them is the goldeneye game where you are walking through the forest but there are walls of trees you can't walk past. People are drinking beer and there are different wooden ledges people are standing on, there's always incredibly weird architecture/furniture in my dreams. And when I'm walking around I see the back half of a spider past me on a stack of hey. So instead of hitting it i light a match to burn the spider. Then when i walk towards it it turns into a person and we start trying to put the fire out. Then I heard someone say that the cops were coming and I ran into this weird house with weird furniture. That's when the dream ended.

Dream 3:

Im not really sure whether to classify this as a dream or not but i was still in an area that looked like the party and i was basically awake and half dreaming, except the dream was very vague, almost day dreaming at this point. I was in a field of corn or straw, couldn't really tell. And I started to throw fire with my hands and a crowd of kids started to run away. Then I walked away to what seemed like one of the kids moms and i ordered her to start blowing me, It felt real but then as i was getting a boner in real life i started to wake up. Thats about the end of it

14.11.2011

Contract (WILD)

★★★★☆

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Journeying downward, into the dark, the depths, from which there will be no return, I make haste in my flight.

Curved, snaking passageways, of naturally-hewn black rock, mark my ever descending path.

At the end, at the lowest reaches, a god awaits me. And he's thrilled to see me.

First, a test: a battle, versus a cloaked wraith.

I draw my sword from my side, and begin my assault, flashing steel hitting it's mark, but to no avail. I toss it aside, as the wraith strikes with its own blade.

Why do I bother with these anymore? I think to myself as the enemy's weapon strikes my flesh, and stops without making a scratch. It seems almost surprised.

I grab it from the ground at my side. I draw it, five feet long, my true sword, white sheath and ornate, dragon-like grip, given to me by a close friend, so many dreams ago.

My smile is demonic as I lash out, cutting through the wraith as if though it were nothing. Piercing and slashing, every cut is wonderfully perfect, joyfully precise. As I sever the wraith, bit by bit, the god is all but ecstatic.

But there's a problem.

Someone else is here.

“I'll take care of it,” I say, preparing to wipe the man in the shadows.

But the god responds harshly, forbidding me from using that ability in his presence.

Probably for the best, I think, darting to the spy, eviscerating him, and ripping my blade across his throat.

I switch to his perspective and watch myself stand there, powerful and absolute, long, beautiful blade in hand, the god just behind. I feel the warm blood erupt from his open neck, our neck, drenching us in a wet, red warmth. I solemnly experience his demise, fading as he does. . . slowly. . . painfully. . . without hope.

11.11.2011

Enter: The Messenger (DILD)

★★★★☆

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

There's someone outside, roving the grounds of the ancient place of worship. Meeting them in a field, patchy grass, yellow and green, I demand to know them.

“Oh, just a god,” he says, nonchalantly.

Oh, how rich, I think as I laugh a long maniacal laugh, the likes of which chills even my bones.

“A god, you say?” I can't help smirking.

“Yes, god of messages. Zeus' personal messenger, as it would so happen to be.”

“Ha. Right,” I say, lifting off the ground, preparing for what I believe will be an easy fight. “You won't mind proving it to me, then.”

He smiles as he draws a blade of energy from his side. I match his with my own, switching to my Energy Sword with a press of a button.

SKWISH!

We clash.

SKWISH!

And again.

No one is gaining ground, so I toss my blade aside and draw out a Katana from it's place at my side. His sword transforms into a rapier, much to his surprise. And much to my surprise, he's more than adept with it, skewering my stomach in due haste, my Katana unable to even scratch him.

FWI---

I try to start up a volley of teleportation assisted attacks, but. . . I can't. All I see after each attempt, instead of a vulnerable back, is his smiling figure, all too ready for me.

Screw it. I toss my sword aside.

“Bankai!”

My energy surfaces and bursts from my body in a blue flaming jet. He's still smiling. The bastard.

Even as I twist and contort his body, tearing into his throat, he grins, unaffected.

And in a moment, I'm distracted. There's some monsters nearby that need taking care of. . .
______________

You shouldn't do that. I hear him in my head.

Screw you.

With a wave of my hand I release all the lock, the controls, sending this bus of a plane down a long and bumpy road, crashing it, stranding the passengers.

That's it. I'm done with this. I'm going to kill him.

Making my way to the main compartment, I'm bombarded with insults and complaints from the passengers. I ignore them the best I can, searching for that damned messenger, who was here moments before.

The insults continue, so I shut up everyone in the room with a wave, zip, and press of my fingers, binding their mouths shut with a few well placed Ats. Except for one girl who somehow remains free from my control.

I'm gonna get it, she tells me. I'm gonna be in for a world of trouble when that messenger from Hades gets back, she insists.

“What? What do you mean, Hades?”

But she won't answer my inquiry as she continues to shout at me.

“SHUT UP!”

She won't.

My alarm wakes me.