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I was awoken by my friend needing a ride to work, so I didn't get to remember and record this dream properly, but as I thought over it, I could actually remember quite a bit fairly clearly. That has since faded, so I'll do my best.

I was at a beach in Croatia with my family. The beach itself wasn't actually very Croatian from my experience - it was sandy and the water was only a little cold, instead of rocky and very cold. Otherwise, the environment was nearly a perfect replica of what I can remember from being there. There was a very wooded island that rose high out of the water, so I decided to swim out to it. I worked my way out there, and began swimming around the island itself, just admiring the scenery. I passed into the island's shadow, and when I came around the other side, it was sunset already, and there was a beach immediately on the other side, actually joined to the island. It led onto the mainland, where my family was already getting out of the water. By the time I got to them, our tour guide (whom I was unaware we had) was there, in a topless bathing suit. There was a restaurant right there on the beach (which was still sandy), and we went inside and I woke up.

I had the fragments of another dream before this when I woke up, but my friend needed this ride urgently, and I didn't have time to write it down. I also remembered more from the beginning of this dream. I do remember that the scenery was incredibly beautiful, which is what I remember of my actual visit to Croatia.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Planning my unplanned Trip


I dreamt...

I am living in a different house than my preset one.
I am hanging out with Travis B. (someone I know as a YouTube artist, an independent film maker from Southern California that I met once while he was premiering a film in Boston), and someone else, one or two others, maybe friends of Travis.

I am scheduled to leave very soon to go on vacation for 2-4 weeks. Soon. Tomorrow? Today! I'm scheduled to leave today, yet, I haven’t planned out my vacation at all! I haven’t planned where to go, what to do. and here I am packing. I’m packing for a vacation I know nothing about. What do I pack? Warm things, cold things? Sports equipment? Skis? Bathing suits? I start packing but then realize how futile, how ridiculous it is to pack for an event that hasn’t been defined. I put of leaving for my vacation since I haven’t make any plans. I tell myself, I’ll leave tomorrow. This makes sense, since I don’t know where to go. Yet I feel guilty, dumb, for postponing a vacation! These is precious and limited time, and here I am throwing one of the few days away. How .. dumb! Lazy. I berate myself for the stupidity and laziness, the lack of planning on my part that has led to losing a day of vacation.

I think back to my last vacation. I even describe it to someone, one of the women who is helping me research ideas and pinpoint a destination or theme.

My last vacation was a wandering road trip. It was adventure, activity, travel, and some workshops. I ended up, at one point, among other places, at a wonderful tropical resort. I did activities there, some with groups. I swam in beautiful places. And it was fun, engaging and beautiful. And, at towards the end, very lonely. I would look around and see that I was the only single person there. Everyone else were in couples. I ended up feeling sad and lonely, a bit left out.

So Travis and a couple others grab me and drag me out doors. We start walking around. They are scheming where to take me. One of the women we’re with knows the area, but is not exactly sure which road to take to get to where she wants to be. We start walking until she realizes we’re going the wrong way, and we turn around. They start running with excitement, now that we’re on the right path. I can’t keep up, because I’m so out of shape. I think to myself, “I am SO out of shape, I can’t even keep up with regular people. What am I thinking going on a vacation in this condition! I can’t do things that a vacationing person would want to do. This is pathetic. I am pathetic. I should just cancel this vacation, just scrap the whole idea. Hell, I don’t even have a plan. What was I thinking?!”

(I realize as we're walking along that I'm wearing a 2-piece bikini. We're walking through the neighborhood, and pass by a nearby beach, so I don't look out of place per se. Yet I realize I'm the only one in my little group in a 2-piece bathing suit. The other women are wearing a 1-piece. I feel so out of place, so self conscious! I am 40 pounds overweight, and feel I have no right wearing a 2-piece. I do what I can to suck in my gut, but it isn't something I can keep up. Oh, how I wish I had a shirt to wear over this, or a sarong to wrap around me!)

They take me into this really small library. But it isn’t a regular public library. It is a kind of small, specialized research station, maybe privately owned. They tear into it, dragging me along. I am not into it, but force myself to go along with it, since they are so enthusiastic - for me and my vacation. I force myself to look at the books on the floor-to-ceiling shelves. Nothing, nothing, nothing. I see nothing, I find nothing, I feel nothing - I am nothing. I hate myself, and am embarrassed that they are more excited about me and my trip, more excited about planning my trip than I am. but for their sake, I drag my body along the aisles with them, and force my eyes to pass across the shelves and shelves of books. Nothing.

They take me up to another floor of more of the same. I move sluggishly, forcing myself. Then something happens. I see something that catches my eye, and my interest. I begin to look around. We must be in the right section, because I like what I see. I begin to get excited, to become engaged in the process. I pull out books and flip through them. Ideas are bubbling up.

At one point, I am in this library, and I’m holding some sort of staff - a scepter (Dictionary definition: “An ornamented staff carried by rulers on ceremonial occasions as a symbol of sovereignty"). It is small, but Powerful. The kind a Monarch would hold to indicate position and royalty. One of the woman who brought me is lounging next to me. She watches me with a smile on her lips and excitement in her eyes. “It is Powerful, isn’t it. An Instrument of Power. It just makes you feel Big, Important, Powerful! Yes, it fits in your hand. You really ought to have one of these. Just to hold once in a while. Just to bring back to you this Feeling of Power. Yes. This sort of thing Belongs in your hand!” And she is exactly right! I look at it in my hand and wonder at how well it Fits.

I wonder how I can integrate this into my trip. I am not sure, but I will, somehow. Perhaps my journey will be a search of how to integrate this, a Journey. While I don’t know the destination of my trip, I now have a Direction.

---

I'm dropping my girlfriend off at home before she and her family go on a long vacation. They are all in their rooms when we arrive and I let her know I don't want to stay around for dinner, though I normally do, because I'd feel like I was overstaying my welcome. Instead, I eat a few slices of grilled chicken real quick and stuff some steak into the front pocket of my shirt.

Her mother walks out from her room. Instead of her normal self, she is Fran Drescher. And though my girlfriend is still with me, I feel very awkward when her mother begins to start conversation with me and ask me about my day. Her mother laughs under her breath at my lack of social skills, but passes it off as though nothing happened. I take my girlfriend out to the car to say goodbye to her officially, but she wants me to test out the helicopters with her they'll be taking on their trip.

I agree and jump into the back of one of the two helicopters now in the middle of their house. Her mother, who is now back to her regular self, lifts the helicopter from the ground. She has clearly never done it before and I remember being worried she was going to crash it. I informed her how the controls worked so that I would feel a bit safer. She seems to get the hang of it very quickly. I told her you can pull up as fast as you want, but you have to gently lower it to keep it from slamming into the ground.

My girlfriend wanted a turn, so her mother handed the controls over to her. She was very forceful with them to the point that I had to tell her to take it easy. She pulled up as hard as she could and when she was lowering it, slipped. The helicopter crashed into the water. Everything turned dark blue and I couldn't see the inside of the helicopter, much less which way was up. She made it out fine, when relieved me. I then took my time unbuckling my seat belt, the entire time wondering if this was really happening. Upon getting it undone and exiting the sinking helicopter, I decided it wasn't and woke up.

---

1-23-11

Dream1: France
Nonlucid
I was on vacation in France and waiting with fellow travelers for the tour guide or someone to come get us because the trip was over.
I was seated on the cobblestone between 2 walls like this. I was sad because the trip was over. I looked around waiting I looked at people walking by and the giant concrete eagle on the wall above me. On closer inspection it was a giant pigeon. [This alone should have told me this was a dream]. Then I looked at some people and checked out the pigeon again. "Hmmm I could have sworn the thing was looking left...." I looked away then back and it was looking in different directions! Then I saw the giant pigeon head move like the stone was alive! I was relieved that I was not crazy, whew! [WTF? And I am a little disturbed to think that this is just what a crazy person would think! "no need to worry, the stone pigeon is alive!" Still no LD, amazing...] I looked around at what a nice day it was but I was getting board.
Then I was in an apartment. I looked up to see a window and it was night. I looked around to see that there was a woman there (white, black hair, mid 20's) this was a living room and I could hear rain. I looked outside and saw it was very dark outside and the rain was pouring down onto the cobblestone ground outside. "I was in Paris twice before and it was raining then too" I said. [I have been to Paris twice but the weather was perfect.] I looked to the girl and she looked back like "so?" I walked off to see what else I could find while marveling at how real everything was.
Then I was in a store a lot like Harrods. I strolled around and just when I thought everything was too boring someone said there was an alarm. I was thinking if I should leave or not when a woman came up to me and said in a heavy french accent "you should really go you know, its dangerous." Then she looked off into the store and from her I heard the word "bomb" even though she did not speak it. I looked outside for the massive bomb/anti terror squad there was sure to be but there was only one police car with its lights on and he looked like he was talking to a woman on a bicycle. "Hmmm, doesn't look like much of anything" I thought.

Dream 2: Midflight
nonlucid

I was driving on a road. Then I saw a line of people in a left turn lane, but they were people, no cars just people standing there waiting for the light to turn. This was interesting so I pulled in behind them and then I realized I didn't have a car but I was walking. The light turned green and everyone turned into a parking lot and walked into a bland white building's back door. I walked in a little after them. I felt like I was trespassing but I walked around only to see that it was a factory plant. I walked out the same door and saw a little old lady startled and then she walked off. "Oh this is really going to be boring." So I decided to fly but I was going to try the superman style take off I have been reading about. It worked! Then I realized that I still I had no idea what I wanted to do up here! Then then visionary shapes started to break apart into random lines and then darkness. I was awake, damn and had just taken off too!

I was up late last night, and have poor dream recall this morning. However, I do remember the following dream:

Walking on the beach

I am on vacation somewhere. I meet a girl who seems to be interested in me. I like her too, and I take her for a walk on the beach. The beach is crowded with people, and I keep getting her confused with a very large and unattractive girl. We walk to the end of the beach, and look out at an island.

Still in the same place, I am with some people discussing how the game Myst Uru can be improved. One guy wants a journey cloth moved to the other end of the little island, to be farther from the beach. One guy is disappointed with one of the Relto pages. I say something about the ending not being satisfying enough...

...something about jail or a police station, or something.

I was on vacation. It was night time, and I was walking along the shore of a beach. I was looking for seashells, but it was hard to see. Someone was walking alongside the beach with me, and they fell into the sand and we discovered a cave beneath the shore. There was someone living in it.

It was the next day, or the next dream, and I was outside the hotel. Behind the hotel there was a clear river with a very fast current. It was very shallow, but because the current was so fast, it was hard to maintain grasp without falling over. People had put patio chairs in the river and were having breakfast.

About 20 feet from the beginning of the river / backside of hotel was an extremely steep drop off to a waterfall. Many youngsters were sliding off from the current and falling from the waterfall, but it was all in fun and no one was getting hurt. I wanted to try. I slid up to the edge of the waterfall and looked down. Holy Shit. The drop off was a good mile or so.

"Stop staring and just slide down! And try not to bring the damn chairs with you!" A man yelled. I looked over, and a chair was sliding down the current with me, about to fall into the waterfall.

I let go of my grip, and the current took me away. Because the current was strong in the beginning, it sort of propelled me from the waterfall.

^ Crude Paint drawing. My path of fallingness is in red.

Before I fell back into the path of the falling water, the free falling sensation was amazing. Once my path aligned with the path of the waterfall, I could no longer breathe. Water was falling in on me from all directions, leaving no room for air. The drop was about 20 seconds, and I hit the misty water like a rock. It hurt. Really bad. Not for kids. Seriously.

Later that day, I was in my 6th hour. We had a substitute, and I was telling him about how I jumped from a really high waterfall. I told him that the fall was around 20 seconds (When I woke up, I used that to calculate the height of the waterfall. It turned out to be around 1.21 miles high, about twice as high as Angel Falls - the highest waterfall on Earth. My estimate seems about right as the clouds were only about 100-200 feet above me in the dream).

My waterfall would be about twice the height of that

The substitute teacher immediately looked interested in what I was telling him. He told me that the waterfall I jumped off of was Mayayuka (or something, it started with an M). He gave me a book about 'realization' and told me to read it.

I sat down, and on the first page it said something like, "One must achieve awareness by doing things that they fear, by taking chances, and overcoming obstacles. Go back to the waterfall, and truly face your fears."

I told Shay that I was going to jump off of a waterfall. I asked if he wanted to come with me. He responded with a "Hell no."

I ran back to the waterfall. The top of the cliff had changed a little, so that there was no longer a hotel but just a dirt path. Two girls I know were at the path talking.

"You're going to jump off of that?" She asked, pointing to the waterfall that was rushing beside us.

"Yes. I am."

The two girls moved out of my way and I stood at the top of the waterfall, looking down. Oh god, this thing got taller. Waaaaaaaay beneath me were little pine trees and a calm turquoise lake. Even though the waterfall was over a mile high, misty water seemed to still float up to the top where I was standing. I could practically see around the world from here. I was only about 100 feet below the base of the clouds.

I decided to take a running jump. I didn't want to look down while I jumped. I was afraid of heights. I closed my eyes, and ran towards the end of the cliff and into the waterfall.

And, for a moment, I was free falling in the air without the pressure of the waterfall above me. It only lasted for a quick moment before I fell into the waterfall's path again and water slapped and shook my body as I continued to fall down for about 20 seconds. I hit the water again, it hurt of course, and went underwater many feet until I gradually swam to the surface.

July 28, 2010

Synopsis: Me and my family stay at a strange hotel, and an even stranger landscape charred by volcanoes. Some abstraction, some vivid.

Vacation by the Volcanic Flats
It's a beautiful warm summer night, and me and my sisters have gone for a stroll with mom. My dream already feels like it's been going on for a while now, but I can't remember it until now. We walk through a giant stone tunnel connecting the downtown to the little town were staying at. Lots of other tourists were also enjoying the stroll through the old castle tunnel, lit by the moon.



The tunnel opens up into a field of grass under an amazing starry sky. We can see our hotel up on a hill. It too looks like an old castle. The hill is rocky, jagged, and black from the volcanic waste it was built on.

In one weird abstract scene a tiny train almost runs us over. We just hop over the tracks and continue our night time stroll up the hill. The grass gives way to boulders and craters.



Sis sees some water in one of the craters, thirsty, she bends down to take a drink. "Stop!" I yell "That's poison! That's volcanic water!" After saving my sis we finally climb the steps to the hotel. The door was open. A little red flag goes off in my head, why is the door open? Did someone break in?

There's no one in the living room, or the kitchen. My sisters check their bedrooms and I check mine. Standing in the doorway I scream "IS ANYONE IN HERE!" Suddenly a cabinet door from the back of my bedroom swings wide open, and then shuts. Scared that my room is haunted, I yell at it - kinda totorro style.

The next morning it was dad's turn to take us out. We climb down the stone steps when a scene of birds catch our attention. Holy crap the birds are HUGE! They're like dinosaurs! Sis gets too close and the birds snatch her. They quickly drop her back down. The giant birds were battling each other. We run down the spiraling steps before they decide to attack us instead.



This scene looks like from a zelda video game. The steps were tiny and narrow. If you fell off the ledge you fell several hundred feet before falling into a deep pool of misty - toxic - water. There was an island in the middle of the misty pool, with a simple wooden cabin. We quickly run into the cabin and take refuge from the crazy giant dinosaur birds.

I love this cabin! There were some other tourists inside, but when we came in we came wanting to own the place. Feeling uncomfortable, the other tourists leave and we lock the front door. This is the kind of cabin I would love to have. It was so warm and adorable! All the doors were gnome like. The hand crafted furniture was for sell and sis has her eye on one of the chairs.

I remember that this part of the dream was the most vivid. It's hard to describe the front room but I remember it pretty clearly. And the cabin actually FELT warm and stuffy. We hear some noises coming from outside. Damn, people are trying to get in! We quickly try to find any doors or windows we forgot to lock. I woke up shortly after.

[B]#11[/B]
[COLOR="RoyalBlue"]I'm on a vacation with my family on Iceland.
On a street with a fisherman who sells knives and stuff like that. He was roleplaying a pirate. He's standing in a wooden hut with only a roof, no walls. He is sharpening his knives.
Some men on the other side of the street sold big furry hats in vibrant colors like a bright pink, yellow, green and blue.
Now we're at a water slide in a very jungle-like place, not far from the place we were before. I met someone who was walking the other way who said hi to me, but I didn't recognize them. It's a lady and a child that comes UP the slide, for some reason.
Me, my mother and my little brother take the slide, I bump into them a couple of times, and my mom and my little brother ven fall out of the slide a few times and landed in a lake, but we just laugh at it. The slide ended in the same lake anyways.[/COLOR]

I had this dream a while back, like when Steve Irwin was still alive.
So me and my friend Brittany were going on a roadtrip to Wisconsin Dells. They have this waterpark there called the Kalahari, which is for like little kids but that's not the point. So we checked into the Kalahari, and when we opened the door to our room, it opened into the real live African Kalahari. So we ventured inside, and looked around. We started to walk to nowhere in particular. Along the way we saw lots of different animals like girrafes and snakes, except they were made from paper like origami animals. I went to touch them, but when i did they died. However, their angel spirit floating up to heaven was a real animal. So they were fake when they were living but real when they were dead? Anyways, I cried when they died. In the background Britt was turning into a tree.

All of a sudden we hear a rustling coming from a bush. (Britt is no longer a tree.) We look over at it, and suddenly this crazy guy wearing a comical wolf mask with a huge nose jumps out screaming, "RAAAHRBOOGABOOGABOOGA!!!" We look at him like, what the fuck is wrong with you? He whips off his mask. "AHA!" he says in an Australian accent. Apparently Steve Irwin has found his way into the dream. "I bet I fooled you lassies didn't I? Ha, no, you two youngsters are smart enough to know that the REAL African Wolfhound has a much LARGER snout!" he says as he makes a circular motion around the mask's nose. Britt and I look at eachother like, whats with this clown? Suddenly he's right in our faces, smiling as wide as possible. "Say, how would you two like to join me on a wild Native American horse hunt?" without our consent he throws us each on a spotted white and brown horse, then jumps on his own, and we ride of into the sunset with Steve laughing maniacally.

In this next clip, I am not included. However, I can see everything clearly through the lens of a video camera. I can tell I am watching a home video taken by a wife of her husband and son. They are on a yacht, sailing around in a little lake on a sunny day. The husband is sitting in a plastic lawn chair by the edge of the boat, but I can’t see his head. The camera is focused on his leg.
In his hand he holds a large knife. He stretches his leg out on the long chair, and makes a long, deep cut in his leg. Almost instantly his innards spill out of his leg like a bucket of chum being poured out, and it falls into the ocean, leaving a flappy skin-baggy leg behind. The man doesn’t stop there, he continues to mutilate himself. This time, he makes a wide gash across his stomach. Again, his guts and muscles and everything else pour out of him, leaving a skin bag stomach. The little son is crying and screaming in the background. “Daddy, please stop!” he shouts, but the father continues. “Whee, isn’t this fun?” says the mother.

-In line at the grocery store with my girlfriend when old high school classmates recognize me and are surprised with how much I've changed.

-Girlfriend tells me that she's leaving to the Caribbean on a school trip. I tell her that I'm going to the same destination as well because of work but she doesn't believe me. While we are arguing, I get an important call I've been waiting for but decide to ignore it.

I talk to my mom about my problems and she informs me that I'm half African American.

I get frustrated with girlfriend and start talking to other girls while I'm at the airport.

For some reason, my high school classmates, my girlfriend and I get driven to the airplane in a limo.

The flight assistant tries to forcefully rush me inside of the plane causing me to drop my items. I get extremely mad and yell at him untill he focuses his attention on someone else.

Once I've boarded the plane, I sit down next to my girlfriend and classmates in a "movie theater" style cockpit.

My dream suddenly turns into a narration as I realize that I was writing a question about my love life on a relationship forum.

Note: I didn't sleep very well this night, I actually only got around 4 hours of sleep for the entire night. I remember several fragments of dreams, but others have told me that I showed up in other dreams which I completely don't remember including an epic fight with Xildron, a shared dream with Walms, possibly a shared Voyager dream with MoSh… Here are the non-epic fragments I remember…

*Pirates of the Caribbean*
I was in a bar working there as a waitress. Somehow this didn't seem strange enough to trigger a reality check even though I have never worked in a bar for a single day in my life… Well, I thought it was completely normal as I fetched drinks and passed them out to a wide array of drunk people amidst a lot of loud talking, boisterous laughter, cat calls, and obnoxious comments… I noticed that the bar was not like a modern day bar with rock music and flashy lights, instead it looked like an old time pub off of an RPG. I had just finished passing out a round of beers and I was heading back for another round when the bar tender, also my boss, signaled me to come over. The bar tender was an older man with a friendly face, although his face was showing clear displeasure now. My first thought that he was upset with me was put to rest when he said the problem was pirates. He said there were two particularly drunk pirates who were arguing with each other and being especially loud and obnoxious, they'd had a bit too much rum, and they were bothering the other customers. I glanced at a group of men in one corner who had insisted on calling me a lot of nasty things and thought the pirates couldn't be worse than them… the bar tender told me to throw the pirates out.

It didn't seem strange to me that he was asking a woman to throw out two drunk pirates… I knew I could handle them just fine. I went to the pirates he had indicated and pulled the first one to the exit door, physically lifted him up and threw him out where he face planted in the dirt in front of the pub. I threw the second pirate out shortly later, and he face planted right near the first one. It was then that I recognized the pirates… the first one I had thrown out was Jack Sparrow, the second was Barbosa, both from Pirates of the Caribbean.

I went out and deliberately threw Barbosa into several more face plants, thinking he deserved it. I then went and helped Jack Sparrow up. I knew the authorities were coming and would arrest both pirates… I helped Jack Sparrow away from the pub so the authorities would not find him, they would find only Barbosa. Jack Sparrow was coherent enough to ask why I had come back to help him, and the only response I could come up with was to say I had wanted to help him because he is hot…


*Pirates of the Caribbean II*
At the beginning of this dream I was watching a television show that had a small town on an isolated island. They believed if any of them were to leave the island they would be killed by the savages in the outside world. The main character was a young woman who dreamed of leaving the island. It seemed like a much overused plot. As I was watching, however, I found myself in the movie in the role of the young woman. I was outside of my house on a seldom used dock during the night watching a full moon reflecting off of the calm ocean water. I was dreaming of other places when I saw something out there, it was a ship. The ship sailed close to the shore and a man swung from a rope attached to one of the masts and landed on the dock like an acrobat of some kind. I was staring in amazement at that as I saw the man was Captain Jack Sparrow. I couldn't help but think he was hot and fantasize about sailing away with him on that ship to far off places and adventures. But why was he really here? My father came out of the house and yelled at me to get inside the house. He didn't seem to have noticed Jack Sparrow or the ship, I figured he hadn't even looked outside to be sure I was actually there. I quickly went inside the house. Later that night when I was lying in bed trying to sleep there was a tap at my bedroom window. I went over to the window to investigate and, much to my surprise, Jack Sparrow was outside trying to get my attention. I opened the window to see what he wanted, I was just happy to be able to see him again before he left. He said he could tell from the moment he saw me gazing out over the sea that my heart yearned for adventure, his ship was short one crew member… he wanted me to come away with him. And I wanted to go, I really wanted to go, but what would my family think? The door to my bedroom slammed open and my father was there with a furious look on his face, he said I should know better than to associate with out world pirates, and if I was to be seeing a man he would choose that man for me… and that made my decision for me. I told my father it was too late, I had already chosen, and he would not control my life… I climbed out of the window and headed for the ship with Jack Sparrow as my father behind me cursed loud enough for the entire island to hear.

*Going On a Holiday*
I was with my friend Alicia and her mother. We had a fun trip to a nearby lake all planned out. We were packing some things up, the trip we had planned included a couple nights of camping and a lot of hiking and playing in the water. It was going to be so fun. While Alicia and I were packing our stuff I wondered if Tigress and Silver might want to come. I thought about asking Alicia if that was ok, but I didn't want to feel like I was imposing by inviting two more people along. Should I ask if Tigress and Silver were even interested? No, I wanted to know if they could come before I presented the idea to them. Alicia's mother was driving the car full of stuff, Alicia was navigating, I was in the back seat. Alicia's mom couldn't drive, Alicia couldn't navigate. Instead of pulling into the car port for the night, we almost ran into my car, turned around somehow, and then somehow ended up three blocks from the house and pointed in the wrong direction. Alicia was mad at her mother, her mother was mad at her, and it ended up with Alicia's mother telling Alicia if she could do better then she should drive. Alicia took the wheel, Alicia's mom got in the back seat with me. We were heading back to the house, taking the long route since Alicia still couldn't navigate, and Alicia's mother placed her hand on my bare leg, I was wearing shorts. Much to my surprise, Alicia's mother started creeping me out when she started massaging my thigh in a sexual manner… uh… I moved her hand off, but she just put her hand back on my thigh and resumed the massaging… This was more than just a little disturbing, lesbian sexual advances from my best friend's mother?! Wtf?!

*Don't Try to Fix Me; I'm Not Broken*
I was in a typical RPG style town that can be seen in pretty much any RPG on the market. A lot of the people there were under mind control, they had been corrupted by dark energy. The enemy responsible for doing that to them was already dealt with, but the people were wandering around like zombies now. So I was going through the town and using healing spells on the people I found who had been infected with dark energy. I was just one of a team of healers doing this, it was a large town and a large number of the people were infected. It took a lot of repetitions of my healing spell songs, but finally it seemed I had found and healed the last infected person in the area of town I had to cover. Once the healing was done all of the healers were to meet back in the town square to confirm the healing process was complete. So now I returned to the town square where I found I was the first one back. It was still early, though, so I wasn't going to get concerned for the others until they were quite a bit later. Soon enough they started filtering back in.

All of us were now talking to each other about how the healing process had gone and how many people we had healed. In spite of being the quickest back to the town square, it also turned out that I had healed the most people. This had been decided on purpose since apparently they all thought quite highly of my healing abilities. We were all talking when one of the healers, a young woman, took a closer look at me. She looked both shocked and worried at the same time, she said I should have mentioned I had been infected. I asked what she was talking about, I wasn't infected with anything. She said she could see dark energy inside me which I had surely gotten from being around so many infected people. She said they shouldn't have put such a large amount of the load on me, it was apparently too much since I was now infected with dark energy. I told her I wasn't infected, I was fine. The dark energy inside me was stable and completely under control, it wasn't a threat to anyone. The other healers didn't seem to understand that or maybe they thought it was impossible to control dark energy, I used to think controlling dark energy was impossible, because now they started doing healing spells on me. Their healing energy was deliberately trying to purge the dark energy out of me, which I didn't really want, but I figured I could get more. Then their healing spells were making my dark energy go unstable, which was not good, so I couldn't let that continue. I told them to stop it, they weren't listening to me and only intensified their healing attempts. I focused on creating a force field to block their healing spells, and they all looked at me as if I was crazy. I told them to stop trying to fix me; I'm not broken! I told them I control my dark energy, not the other way around!