Biker bar shenanigans I am in a biker bar that is dimly lit There were other instances before this that blurred together I am looking around at the neon signs and people sitting around the bar All of their facial features seem blurred and misshaped I immediately know that I am dreaming Looking at my hands, yup too many fingers and two thumbs per hand I try to remember my dream tasks and decide to summon Swinging my hand out and back in I have a gun in my hand Nope, did that already, I de-summon it while looking at it, just fading into nothing Remembering I’m in a bar I decide a beer would be nice! A bottle slowly phases into my gripping hand while I look at it The DCs around me are staring(through their deformed eyes) I gather I am putting on a magic show of sorts for them lol Hold the beer up to drink it exaggeratedly and feel the liquid going into my mouth It tastes like nothing, like no carbonation or anything, almost like drinking air that has volume to it, I am let down because I wanted to drink something in a dream It seems to be hard to remember the whole list of tasks from the competition I remember thinking about telekinesis (this used to be my most reliable dream sign but had the thought the other day I haven't had any TK dreams in quite some time) Reaching out with one hand I levitate all the bottles sitting on the bar People sitting around stand up and audibly gasp Oh boy now I’m causing a scene I drop them all at once and hear some glass breaking I walk around the bar just taking in the details It seems dimly lit and not as clear as I would prefer so I say in my mind loudly “CLEAR” The picture snaps into focus and brightens some, good enough I then remember thinking how I’ve never made a portal in dream and that would be interesting Holding my hand out with two fingers extended like Dr. Strange I start drawing semi-circles in the air Greenish sparks start coming out of my fingers and I can see the outline of the portal forming I’m unsure where I want to go, the portal seems to be fading in and out It is now a large human-sized oval greenish portal like from rick’s portal gun I sidestep into it without a clear idea of where I’ll end up The dream pauses/does that screen shake thing that happens when you walk through a portal in VR chat The dream destabilizes and I lose lucidity as the next dream locale boots up Fragment I befriend a younger couple, and the girl has eyes for me I attempt not to be disrespectful but the guy is constantly leaving us alone It feels like a survival situation We have a hole with cargo nets in it we can hide in to be safe Fragment of a war game/outdoor airsoft match I throw a grenade through a window a great distance away, and hear the enemies yelp before it goes boom Fragment I am with my friend who has started a fire in his backyard to keep us warm He started the fire inside a dilapidated shed with no roof and missing a wall or two I worry the fire could spread Some time elapses and I go back to his backyard to check on things The fire has completely engulfed the shed as it was mostly all dried aged wood frames He doesn't seem to mind much because they were going to have to clear it away anyway I am slightly concerned at the size of it and people might notice Then we hear the news playing from inside his house They are reporting a house fire seen from miles away They describe the location as being exactly where we are I think, oh boy here we go The dream fades while we talk about how to deal with the tall flames
I am at some event that is fairly crowded. The area is indoors and unfamiliar. It almost looks like a large barn or just has similar décor. The crowd is currently transitioning outdoors, but I’m heading in the other direction, when I run into Sage’s parents. I start talking to them and her mom apologizes for her dad, who has been drinking all day/since ‘early’. He slurs something about it being the 4th of July, spilling a bit from his glass onto her mom. I tell him no worries, I get it. They continue on, and I watch her dad slightly stumble. I am in what seems to be a very empty hotel. The place is very dim and seems taller than it is wide. The rooms are actually little alcoves with only a mattress and a curtain to close them off. They’re only about 5’x5’ and very close together. I don’t see a single one occupied. I go a few floors up to what seems to be the top. There’s a single room and it feels a little larger than the others. I crawl onto the bed and wait for Melissa. I think we’re going to have sex here since it feels like we can get away with it. Now, a very large family approaches and stops outside, making it clear this is their room. I can’t believe it’d be this one out of the many, but I coolly play it off and leave.
I'm upstairs with some people. One of them play the guitar and I also want to play. After a while I take the guitar and start to play "who says" by John Mayer, it feels very realistic. Elina says something about how good it is to be able to play guitar and that I should keep it going. I went to sleep very late and know that I usually get lucids when I resleep in the morning. I program my brain to know that it's going to be a dream when I re-sleep which created this intresting dream. It's pitch black but I'm councious. I'm trying to feel where I am because I can't use my vision and touch a wooden surface. I now know that I am in the kitchen. I try to get my vision but does not succeed. I feel my way foreward and come to the sink. I feel on the metallic water tap and turn it on. I put my mouth under and drink some water and it feels realistic. I try to open my eyes but I'm afraid that I might open my real eyes and wake up. Somehow I enter a game in a fast transition and lose my lucidity. My whole view is a pixilated game that is in a third person view tomb with a dark brown color theme. I'm an adventerur who dodge some tornadoes thrown away at me by some wizards. I woke up thirsty with a dry throat because I was drinking in the dream.
I am walking through what looks like Dad’s neighborhood (maybe on one of the higher streets, like Virginia Foothills). I run into Kat and she ends up walking with me. It is near sunset and some of the lower and plumper clouds are getting some color. The rest are smaller and almost evenly spaced, bright white against the blue. I look directly up and notice a glowing sliver of the moon. It’s all very pretty. Kat mentions the sky too, saying she’s grateful for Emma for getting her to pay more attention to it, and that she wants to see it more often. I take some pictures of it as we walk. We end up at her house. I think the garage door is open, and I can tell by the way she’s talking that she has intentions to leave now. Before she does, I somewhat bluntly mention how I want to stop drinking. This seems to pique her interest, and she talks to me about it. I tell her I feel like quitting altogether but am not sure if I should stick with moderation. She pulls a little red champagne flute from somewhere and hands it to me, saying I could use it for moderation. I look at it and its almost grimy looking opaque sides, imagining how it might hold a small serving. I kind of like the idea and think I might take it, but then change my mind. I say that I want it to be a mindset thing and not something like this. Now, Chelsea has shown up, I think in a car. She stands behind us and when she sees me she recognizes me but thinks I’m someone else. I tell her no and think it slightly odd that she wouldn’t remember me. I am now walking back, now either on a dirt road or a road surrounded by dirt and small hills. There’s a small stream of water running down this slope, through the soil and grasses. I follow it and see where it meets another stream on an opposing slope, turning to one and running downwards. I look out to my left and notice a hill where water appears to be coming from. There’s a tiny canyon carved into the soft looking dark brown soil, and I imagine walking through it. I am walking right by where the streams meet, doing okay with stepping on the sturdier patches of soil and grasses. Most of it is still soft and it’s hard to tell what will give, so I end up getting both of my shoes wet and muddy. I end up back home, rinsing and scrubbing them. I put them out to dry even though it’s pretty overcast. I’ve gotten an email from the new girl at work (it’s not actually the girl who is supposed to start. I think I see a profile picture on the email or something and it’s an unfamiliar heavyset white girl). She’s asking about me not being there for a shift, but I’m pretty sure I haven’t been scheduled. I think I’ve been using time off. She sounds more like a manager than a coworker and kind of annoying. After the text there are a few pictures of a hotel room - I think it must be a work thing. The hotel seems nice and also very familiar. I think I must have stayed there before. I think it looks more impressive than it actually is. A picture of the shower shows the floor of small, dark pebbles and the opposing stainless steel shower heads. Now, I am in the hotel. It looks like someone had just been here but tidied a bit before leaving, so I guess I just missed her. There’s a full looking black garbage bag in the abnormally large space adjacent to the toilet. The toilet itself actually has a garbage bag around it, somehow from the ground up. I adjust the opening of the bag so as to be able to use the toilet. I am somewhere with the family. We’re in a plain, rectangular building that is for something like customs or passports or photos (something that we have to do together as a family). I notice quite a few other families here too, I think seated at tables. Whatever we’re doing here, the personale is being very aggressive with us. They are making us do tasks or challenges that seemed to be designed to result only in failure. A younger guy, I think in a uniform, tries to handcuff me but only gets one finger. He notices, his facial expression betraying his embarrassment, and tries again. The same happens, though he doesn’t notice this time. He tells me to now “clap above your head and find some shade.” I think he also holds me down to ensure failure. Still, I succeed in clapping above my head, slightly satisfied with defying his expectation of failure. I’m not sure about the shade part though. These things go on for a while longer. When we are done, I’m thinking about how I’m going to write to someone about how atrociously we were treated. From a third person perspective I am seeing a high rise building (a hotel) that stands alone on a sprawling fine sand beach. The building seems somewhat modern and is mostly a tower but with some structural embellishments at the base. It is also way too near the water and, in fact, there is currently water submerging the first few floors. I think there’s something about the occupants just staying inside when it floods, though that seems counter intuitive. Someone is interviewing a lone, blond man maybe in his late 20s. He seems foreign, probably European, though he is speaking more articulately than most native speakers. I think he’s talking about the structural design and why it is flooding.
I think I’m at either Matt and Sara’s or Opa’s house. It seems to be a family gathering. There also seems to be some tension between Matt and Sara. I find Sara alone and ask what’s going on. She tells me that she’s pregnant but Matt won’t stop drinking. Sure enough, I look over and see him holding what looks like a glass of whisky. I am on a promenade along the river. I think some of the family is here too. I also can’t shake the feeling that this place is very familiar somehow.
Morning of June 26, 2018. Tuesday. These are two dreams during the same sleep cycle. Marilyn (older half-sister on my mother’s side who died in 2014) appears in both. In my first dream, I am back in the Loomis Street house. At times however, I also seem to be simultaneously present, at least in mind, in the Rose Street building (where I have not lived in real life since 1967 at age six). I am “remembering” it incorrectly though, which is usually the case in non-lucid dreams when thinking skills and viable memory (and viable contact with the unconscious mind) are not present. I am conversing with Marilyn about the Rose Street building (where she also lived in the 1960s across the hall from me and my parents). The conversation focuses on the elevator that was, in my fictitious memory, near the back of the building. I discuss the elevator as well as the rickety steps (that were a real-life feature). I relate how my mother did not like me using that staircase. I talk more about the fictitious elevator. My dream eventually fades (without waking) and I am in a different dream scenario. In my other dream, I am sitting on the floor in the Loomis Street dining room (where I have not been in real life since February 1994). I eventually end up drinking what I first believe to be solely soda, though from a large plastic bucket and with a long drinking straw that almost reaches the bottom of the bucket. Over time, I realize that there is more in the bucket than just soda. In fact, when I begin to focus, I realize that I drank a lot of water with laundry soap in it. In the bucket, there are also a couple of clothes (my pants and shirt, at least), a few Matchbox cars near the bottom, and other items as well as other liquids (such as orange juice) mixed in. I mention this to Marilyn (who is in the living room near the front door) and my mother (who remains in the southwest area of the dining room) as I remain sitting on the floor. (My mother died in 2002.) I tell them how I do not feel any different after drinking this unlikely mixture of soda, laundry suds, and possibly other contents. I eventually notice a pile of clothes on the floor. I end up mostly lying on my right side, feeling very aware, and wondering if what I drank will affect me. I focus on my perception and there is a very vivid awareness but no lucidity. My dream soon fades. Despite my dream self not being viably lucid, I am still always aware on one level of when I am dreaming, as it is biologically impossible not to know I am dreaming. This changes the entire nature of what many people believe dreams to be. Although my memory is not viable (because of being without viable contact with my unconscious mind while in the non-lucid dream state), there is a thread of memory of dream state autosymbolism. My dream self is actually describing dream state autosymbolism without being lucid. This has happened many times before even in childhood dreams. An elevator is autosymbolism for the dreaming and waking process. It has nothing to do with waking life “symbolism” (as dreams are not symbolic in the conventional sense). My last dream also reveals liminal awareness of the dream state. This is evidenced by my position on the floor. Although I usually sleep on my left side, I had this dream while briefly sleeping on my right and I was mostly on my right as my dream ended. The rest is more about distortion from lack of viable joining of unconscious and conscious self identity. I also had mild indigestion in sleep and my dream was creating a ridiculous scenario to remind me of such. The laundry soap and loose clothes were present as a reminder I am not wearing clothes when I am asleep in bed.
Note to self: write down dreams when you wake up so you don't forget them like an idiot throughout the day. One dream I was in my middle school, I think Kolby was there. Another dream I was at KC lakeview pool, there were a lot of people there working. I believe I was working too. It seemed to be early in the morning and the day progressed very quickly. Another dream I was trying to go to the beach with Moo and Owen but I was currently at home. I was debating whether or not I wanted to get back there. I think this might've been linked to the middle school dream in some way. We might've been drinking in the middle school, then came out onto the pool deck, and then I was at home with my Mom trying to go back to the middle school/beach/pool.
First dream I was in a party. It was a huge party in some great party complex. There was dancehall, bar and even a cinema. I was there with classmates, we were sitting by a bar and drinking vodka. People around were having fun, but some didn't. I also had fun. We finished drinking and looked around - all people went to cinema. We went there too and took our seats, but I couldn't see a thing from mine so I changed it. There were some girls sitting behind us, they allowed us to take these seats if we won't disturb them. The movie started, it was about a man who used a ray to make his children gigantic. One of classmates said that I left my vodka by a bar and laughed. Second dream I was in my house, browsing the web with my phone. I was downloading something - a game engine. It weighted only 7.1 MB. Then two of my sisters appeared and jumped on me, then started hugging me. The engine downloaded when they were finished. I hid my phone and went to kitchen. Looking at the table I saw a few rows of glasses with pickles. On the hallway there were parents and sister talking with one girl from my class. Third dream It was in some city, a sunny summer day. I was wandering on a sidewalk when some people rapidly run out of nearby house. Some people with machine guns chased them. They wanted to kill them and tried to kill me too as I was a witness. They took cars and escaped. I took a nearby sports car and drove with them. They stopped at some mansion of a man that controlled half the city. They went there to ask for help on eliminating them. I went with these people and said them that they should just shoot them. But they didn't listened, they went to that crazy man and he said that if they want help, each of them should entertain him. He gave a tall blonde girl a mug and told her to fill it with cereals. She did it and then he ordered her to eat it. I left them, meeting another dude from the group on the way. I told him about what happened and he said that he waits for his turn. I ran out of the building and got into my car. I took off saying that I'm just gonna shoot them. There were some Muslims talking in the radio, they were talking about their homeland. I just drove, hitting a few cars with high speed on the way. Then I drove to that building. There was group of women, one of them seemed both attractive and really close to me. I knocked to door and men with guns opened. I disarmed one of them and got inside. But instead of shooting them all, I gave them an offer. I thrown some really shiny crystals in the ground and told them that it's beginning of my business, which will repay to them in mere weeks if they'd invest in it. I gave them bank account number and left.
(Dreaming hasn't been a focus lately, but: ) I'm floating in a void full of clouds and stars, and recognize that I'm lucid. A destination comes to mind - not one I'd planned in advance, it's an impulse. With that thought, I have the impression I've changed direction, moving closer to the earth - slightly negative connotations here; not bad, just frivolous. I'm in a bar; it serves as a front room for my actual destination. There's conversation, people sitting around at tables; the bartender's a heavyset and balding man. Asks what I want to drink. I believe I'm not physical enough here to either drink or pay for anything, but refusing to order anything isn't acceptable, so I ask for a water. I'm thinking about the unusual vividness of this scene. The man to my right, clearly a regular, starts talking to me and the bartender, talking about the guy who owns this place (the person I came here to see) and the way things are done here; I'm going to have to set up a tab before I can order anything, even water. The bartender asks to see my phone in order to give me the owner's number. I take it out, but the screen's showing what I think of as the real world, in contrast to this place. I'm concerned about the bartender seeing that and recognizing that I'm out of place here. I hand him the phone anyway. He programs the number in without seeing anything out of the ordinary and hands my phone back. The image on the phone, my 'real' world, is showing a woman with dirty blonde hair, winter clothing, knit hat, walking on a narrow street at night, the outskirts of a small city maybe, lots of greenery around on this particular street but the sense that there's a much more heavily built up area within walking distance. She's talking to someone, male, a friend or a sibling. The scene shifts so I'm there with them. They walk, they talk, they're being followed by something other than me. There's a sense of the dream becoming a nightmare. As they entered an apartment building, I made the mistake of reacting to the other thing following them, thus letting it realize I was aware of it and attracting its attention. It attempted to latch onto me instead, and in the next scene it's taken on the role of my younger sibling (not one of my actual IRL ones), inserting itself into a role in my dream the same way it had been playing a role in that woman's dream. There was a brief moment where I accepted it as my sibling, before I remembered. It was very shocked when I hurt it in the process of removing it. "Ow, ow, you're hurting me!" "Get off of me, then." It did, and I woke up.
Updated 08-31-2016 at 06:18 AM by 64691
First dream It was night. I was wandering around my backyard, watching the night sky. There were colorful shooting starts traversing it. I found a chair in the middle of the backyard and went closer. Then one of shooting stars came closer to me and I realized that it was alien spaceship. Second dream It was cloudy, cold morning. With siblings I was playing a strange card game. We used the ordinary cards deck, part of the game was throwing cards against other players, them grouping half of your deck and revealing it when everyone was ready to do so. We were also drinking some strong alcohols during cards session.
Dream - Flat street It was night time and I'm I'm walking out of a party with some people, the street we're on is the typical student flatting area. I remember seeing some random person driving a car. The person was obviously drunk as hell as they couldn't park their car, she was just ramming it backward into another car, then forward into a tree. Over and over and over O_O. Me and the people I was with crossed the road to get to a house on the other side (I think we were going to another party). As I made my way across, the drunk driver ran me over :/ I knew that this had to be a dream since I was semi-awakened from the shock. But it just didn't stop and I couldn't feel the pressure, discomfort and pain from this 4WD ute running me over. It really felt horrible, but I managed to shake myself awake in the end.
Earlier Ld frag: I shortly become lucid and recall the basic totm, start looking for a book. I think I find one with gibberish on it. Other dreams and the above section is mostly forgotten. Nld part: I get dragged into some sort of a drinking contest where people queue, leave a bottle, get points for it, then are served drinks, some pay for them, score more points. I order grapefruit white wine cocktail. It takes forever to get it but the bartender finally gives me my glass - with a little pink liquid at the bottom. It tastes like smoothie, not too bad but definitely not grapefruit and wine. I continue to the next stage of the contest up some stairs where I find myself in an elevator shaft by mistake. I try to get out of there. A man requests my assistance lifting some of his contest goods. In another room - another guy leaves his PC above the toilet seat. I'm outside now and everything suddenly comes into focus. It was as if I wasn't seeing where I was the moment before. But now I know - it's a dream. I look around thinking about it. On an unknown street, I try to determine my location. Never been here before. I look at the style of buildings trying to assess which country is this. Maybe the States. I begin to recall that I had another very brief lucid already with the totm. It's a bit blurry and I only recall looking for the book. Better not to go into too much thought right now. Let's find another book and see what's written there. I walk down the street thinking about summoning a book. Despite my overall confidence of being able to summon almost anything, this feels like one of these dreams where the environment is different and as if the summon won't work. I walk down the street looking around and wondering whether to enter inside to look for a book but this seems like a bad time consuming idea. I see a pile of junk near one of the houses and decide to investigate it. There are couple of books right on top. How convenient! The first one is a notebook, so I put it to the side. Then I grab three differently colored books with lavishly decorated hardcovers. I take the top one and examine it. What does the title say? Gibberish again. Would that count, I feel disappointed. I look again as the letters keep changing until they finally make actual words "The boredom of God". I browse through the pages which are filled with more gibberish words and think about this. Maybe god is bored because I can't get any information out of this book. Nevermind. I look up and try to memorize the title. Surely I will forget this any moment now so I decide to shout it out loud several times. I keep shouting as I look around. I feel excited to have a lucid dream. I want to stay here longer, but as am about to shout again, the dream starts to thin out and I wake up.
Updated 01-10-2016 at 10:31 AM by 61764
There's a party full of drunk and pretty people I've gotten caught up in; it's being held in the honor of someone I don't really know, and when a group splits off for the private party, I go with them. The door closes behind me and Jules. Jules is dead sober - I'm not - and he doesn't look amused. I'm talking to him about the person I've been trying to meet up with, a guy who's meant to be part of this group of party people somewhere; I'd first met him in a cell in Bangladesh, where I'd been trying to track down a particular object. I'm trying to stir Jules' memory of that time, but he just nods, goes yeah, yeah - he's annoyed. He says, "Was I shot?" in a tone that suggests this happens frequently, and is probably my fault. "In the left arm," I tell him. He looks at the fingers of that arm, and I see a mental image of the neck of a stringed instrument. The implication is that getting shot affected his ability to play. Jules says, less annoyed now, "I do remember that one."
In the previous scene, I'd been doing shots with a man who drinks live snakes, one every day. The bartender gives me a dead one, since it's my first time; it'll go down easier. Now I'm walking around half-submerged ruins where I've been before. There's meant to be a door here, though I hadn't seen it the first time around. Now that I'm searching, though, I spot the fold in reality that's hidden it, pull it through so that it becomes solid. It's set in the base of what had been an empty stone arch. The other side of the door is an in-between place, and I go slightly lucid in order to pause and enjoy the view. It's a stone bridge hanging in space, pale stone, low and sloping walls on either side, and something like coral growing over it in patches. This space has the quality of light seen from underwater, and floating above there's some enormous, amorphous, diaphanous shape, jellyfish-like. It's all very pleasant. Along the bridge I run into two women with the tails of snakes, mermaid-like, who are frozen in place, and whose verbal words don't match the meanings I hear - the verbal words are friendly, the underlying meaning is to get me to come close enough and stay long enough for them to kill and eat me. I find them pleasant, too; I can't blame them for being hungry, this place sees so little traffic, and I don't intend to stay long enough for them to kill me, so they're effectively harmless. When I leave the in-between place, it takes me to a scene where an Egyptian woman with a clipboard is consulting a guest list. I have to wait in line behind some snake-haired triplets while a dead human woman talks to the woman with the clipboard, trying to justify why she belongs inside, citing the royal status of her lover.
Updated 10-28-2015 at 10:10 PM by 64691
I'm in a garden, speaking in Russian with a very old human man in a wheelchair. We have an arrangement. I'm to kill him, but as he puts it, without ugliness. That he wants his death to be smooth, I have no problem with, but this ugliness he's referring to isn't about his own death, it's about preserving his image of me, or rather what I represent to him. He says I'm a man who should understand this, unlike that brother of mine - he uses a word that my dream doesn't bother to translate aside from noting that it's uncomplimentary. The old man wants to believe in the existence of a creature that's above all the things he dislikes in humanity, an embodiment of death without ugliness. I'm disgusted and feel illogically betrayed by hearing this from him, a man more intimately acquainted with violence than any human I've ever known - he of all people shouldn't have any illusions about this. It's hypocrisy. As he talks we move indoors, to a dimly-lit room that's kept very cold. He has a selection of alcohol lined up before a mirror, and I go to pour him a glass; as I do so I see a small portrait of a blonde woman, which I pick up. A woman who works for him, who's been pushing his wheelchair, urgently asks me to be careful with that. I recognize the image as his granddaughter - she's how I met him in the first place, years back. He laughs and corrects me, and he says this in English: "Vivian. Her mother." This startles me, and I examine the portrait again - I would never have guessed they weren't the same person. Her mother had died before I met her. (Woke up. Back to sleep.) While using a spell to pull out some relevant books and scrolls from a collection, one of the books that comes to me is titled "The Unbeauty of Life," by a Japanese author. I'm running up several flights of stairs, spiraling upward through a ruined building, piles of rubble around; I should have fled the building with the others when I reached the first floor but instead I kept going upward, thinking of the woman I'd originally come here to track down. As I reach the upper levels I find her laboratory, with her books scattered on the floor, sarcophagi in rows. The next level above that is devoted to "the theatrical vampire," complete with red stage curtains hanging on the wall, full of what I think of as romanticized images from stage and screen, and as I look at it I remember the sound of her laughing. There's one more floor above this.
Updated 02-27-2015 at 11:10 PM by 64691
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