lucid

MEMORABLE
Length: 1 hour (total)
Type: Lucid (half lucid half not lucid)

I was talking to my friend Josh from middle school (in my middle school, even though its summer). He was saying something, but I can't remember what. I then remembered in the dream, that I had just WILD'd (first successful WILDing!). So I told him this
"Bro, this is a dream, I can do whatever I want, because its not real."
He gave me his usual "your crazy" smile. The dream started to go fuzzy, as if I were losing it. The whole halls were bending around like I was spinning, and I tried to stop thinking and look at my hands to stabilize my dream. I couldn't, I had fell asleep ON my hands. I tried to not focus on much without closing my eyes, it worked.

After that, I started walking about and testing some lucid dreaming control, the most memorable was trying to turn a guy into a teddy bear because he was being a bully to me once, but he turned into paper instead. I was sitting on a bench in a garden trying to think this whole lucid stuff through, when a girl I knew walked up to me. She had gotten the plans about which classes we would be in next year, she told me them, then quoted Rena (my awesomely awesome best language arts teacher ever) on something. Then I woke up, at least I thought I did.

The next part of this is kind of fuzzy, so bear with me.
I was driving down a hill or something, and through the trees I saw a space center. I looked at the launch tower, and thought about spaceshuttles, and how they don't launch them anymore. By thinking about it it actually made it happen, so I saw a spaceshuttle. I should have recognized this as a dream, but I didn't OK? Sue me. We drove along and I saw this scene play out from a kid's cartoon I used to watch. There were poles blocking us from entering a cave, but we drove through them anyways, down there there was a polar bear, and we got in a fight with icicles and rocks.
(memory blindness)
I woke up (for real this time). I then realized what the hell happened, and this is what did happen:

1. I woke up around 7:00 I think I tried to WILD and succeeded!
2. All that first dream stuff happens
3. False awakening into that second dream
4. All that second dream stuff happens
5. Woke up for reals, and then got a huge confidence boost.

Date: 12 June

Total sleep time: 7 hrs

Pre bed: Gingko

Sleep quality and recall: I was tired after getting only 6 1/2 hrs the day before, yet I spent too much surfing before bed. As a result I slept quite deeply, dreams were vivid, averagely accessible. I was not in the mood to take early notes.The LD chain totally messed up my recall. I recovered the key parts, but dream reality was much more detailed.

WBTB: Had a natural wake earlier and then later than planned. Decided to use the later as WBTB, drank 1/2 RB. Was sleepy so no problems there.

Fragment1: My school

WBTB

Fragment2: A friend from the very distant past finally appears in my dreams (at least this year). She wants some help with her research.

Dream3: I am back to my hometown and meet a neighbor friend of mine. I have some thoughts about her excessive use of alcohol and cigarettes. When I see her, she confirms my expectations, immediately starts smoking and we sit in some cafe/bar outside initially and have some beer. She finishes her bottle and as I notice I have also finished mine. She goes to get another one for her and I want one too. She pays for everything. I am concerned that I have finished my bottle so fast and am about to have a second one. I continue thinking that it is likely that we will drink at least 5 bottles each this evening. I feel drunk and wonder if this is going to mess up my lucidity. I heard there is great REM rebound.

Fragment4:I am in a room, similar to my old place, my parents are there. Dad has some issues and gives me one of his disapproval looks. I remember the bed, did I fall asleep?

My subcon takes over and decides it's time to have a lucid

LD1:

I am above the sea surface, remembering one of my non-current goals to check out things from the past. I don't know why but I end up investigating what happened to the titanic. I pay some thought to what has happened. (I watched the movie a long time ago and can't recall the story). I have thoughts/fake memories that in real life they still don't know what happened and concluded it hit an iceberg. They never found the black box. I am watching a zoomed part of a non-sunken ship when thinking this. I finally remember that I never wanted to know anything about the titanic. I want to move on. I am temporarily disconnected. I simply desire to continue the dream.

My subcon takes over and I easily resume from non-physicality/void.

LD2: I am flying over a city, which is supposedly the place in the past where I want to go. Initially it looks like a toy city in the midst of the ocean, but as control my flight (which is hard), it begins to look like a real city, and I recognize it as Rome. I see the Colosseum, which looks a bit different, also lots of buildings with red rooftops. It feels as if I am flying over ancient Rome at low plane altitude. It is so exciting, I really believe that I have managed to go back in time.

I am zooming in and out ancient Rome to manipulate the city into being the real Rome and not a toy replica. I notice that I am chewing gum. I am now in a large empty and borderless room and Rome is like a mini replica taking a large part of the room. I become concerned about the gum. I have a false memory of the room with dad where I think I have fallen asleep. "Yes, I had a chewing gum", I am thinking and believe I can feel it in my physical mouth. I wrongly remember that CL also fell asleep with chewing gum. I become very worried but decide that I am going to spit/take out the gum and this will make my physical self do it too. I begin maneuvering which makes me semi-enter the void and supposedly feel my physical body. I get out three pieces of chewing gum. I don't feel any gum in my physical mouth so I am relieved. The dream destabilizes and I end up in the void.

LD3 & LD4+:

My memory is a bit messed as the exact initial place where this began as I happen to DEILD back and experience a similar fragment of the dream. The dream was fading so I came back more than once.

I am in what looks like the outskirts of some city, it the midst of mostly greenery. I am talking to this guy, then explore around by myself. There are lots of plants so really no way to give more detail. To my right is some kind of a road with barbed fence, I want to go there, but notice only cyclists use it. I walk around a bit more, dream fades.

I am more or less at the same place and I see the same guy ( who is an actor I don't know his name irl) on the initial trail. I am happy to have some partner to explore with during the dream, but he becomes evil. I do my best to change him, by being overly positive. He initially does not change but instead does something to my back, it really hurts. I am thinking about "invulnerability" from DV competition, so I may try to use it if he continues, but the pain is very strange. He calms down a bit and we move along, still surrounded by greenery.

I am by myself, and have spent quite a while exploring around. While there are mostly plants around, I finally reach the city. It looks like a small town, not too modern or at least that part in front of me. I notice a yellow? building in front of me and some sign "Leyle.."or "Harley". I try to memorize the name so that I can check it out later. I can't recall the surroundings so well anymore.

I look to my left, where across the river I see a more modern looking city, illuminated sign with the location, and the Gateway arch (* that excuse my ignorance I had to later google to confirm is located in St. Louis). I continue on my way but the dream slowly fades.

LD5: I enter a white one-story building. There is a DC woman in front of me and she is saying something with an echo effect. I become excited and start talking with a fake accent, but I can't concentrate much on what I'm saying. The dream feels a bit unstable. Still I want to go on with it and think I may go for transformation this time. But then I notice that lots of DCs are sitting behind a table, starring at me, much like a jury. It dawns on me that this is the perfect opportunity to get naked. I look down/stretch my clothes and with a relief see that this time I am wearing an easy long white polo-style dress. I am still worried that I will wake up once it gets on my eyes, so talk to the DCs first. I tell them to sing along, I want to use the sound as an anchor. I keep repeating, now incorporating a melody "Sing along" as I take my dress off. I now go to take my panties off. Panties gone. I do feel a little weird after these actions, a DC woman is looking at me surprised. I really hope that this isn't for real. I am all naked but for a bra that I try to take off as I wake up.

I am in my body and want to go for a DEILD. I lie on my back and wait but it doesn't work. Interestingly, I am also starving. It is not easy to LD.

What I have noticed today: It was much easier to continue LDing when I had a strong desire to resume with the dream. My subcon did the work, with little involvement on my part, which may account for the successful chaining.

Based on location I am approximating the 5+ LDs to an official count of 4 LDs and 1 micro ld.

---------
Progress with this months goals (as of 12 June morning):

- Do 100 RCs (10/100)
- notice real life DS 100 times and RC (11/100)
- 10 proper WBTB attempts -> days (5/10)
- 10 morning RCs (2/10)
- 2 proper WILD attempts (0/2)
- task flexibility
- journal flexibility

LDs: 10 (official count)
micro-lds: 2 (for informative purposes, not counted)
suspicious events: 2 (not counted)

EDIT 22.08: after more experience with lds, I realized that this was not DEILD chaining, as I didn't really wake up from the dream and feel my body in any way, just the dream ended and a new one started.

I had a very powerful dream last night that I am not going to post in detail here however I dreamed of N and we talked about old memories and I said goodbye.

I was aware that the world was not waking life however I would not say I was aware I was dreaming, as if it were something different all together. Either way it was a very powerful dream and one that I have been obsessing over all day.

I woke just before 7 on a natural wake up remembering the 3 dreams, and I realised what a gift this experience was.

Dream recall from today's nap. Had headache so not surprised by weirdness.

I am at home, i have some theory about something related to going to sleep, so i go to sleep to test it i spontaneously become aware that i am dreaming, then there's weird noise and i wake up.

Lucid Dream #1

I was at school. In the black lab.
It was about 4 times bigger than usual. I saw a girl sitting down, in a white shirt. I knew who she was, but she looked kind of different.

This is when I became lucid.

Note that I did not take any supplements or induce this dream.

I walked up to her.
I realized something, and it made me look to my left. There was a stage of some sort, it was not familiar. I went up to the stage and there was a man, he was holding a competiton. It was for how long you can jump on a pogo stick.
I recently got one, and I am so-so good with it, so I took the challenge. We were jumping on a carpet that looked like a casino game board, it has black and red squares I forgot the name though.

Then, I woke up.

3:30AM - Lightning gun - NLD
Fragment shooting people with a lightning gun. Have a buddy helping. Looks like Borderlands.

6:00AM - Demons - NLD

There are square shadows floating in the air above us in a church. I turn around and pull out a long Obsidian dagger. I look around and everyone has blades of many shapes and sizes all made of the same material and all glowing. It begins to glow blue as I ready myself. The demons are afraid and don't come any closer. I slash at one and cut it in half. I take the other half and rip it up. I use dream control to make it dissolve into nothingness.

I am ridding in a car and the driver has a large envelope with one of the demons in it. It begins to moan and complain about trivial discomforts in a womans voice. The driver mockingly calls it his god. I wake up.

Time unknown - Micro Lucid - DILD
\
I walk into the living room and see my son running up to me. I pick him up and yell at my wife, telling her he was walking. I know this has to be a dream. But unfortunately I either woke up or lost lucidity because I remember nothing else.

Another swing and a miss at meeting Art at the Alamo. But the good news is that I managed to remember (and execute) Basic Task of the Month!

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #104: Reservations

I have a false awakening at home and stumble out of bed. I'm disappointed and slightly grouchy that I failed to achieve a lucid dream. Feeling unmotivated, I wander aimlessly through the house, contemplating how late for work I probably am. I think that it's Friday, though, and I'm looking forward to ordering pizza with the guys at the office and shooting the breeze for a while. (Nope, today's Wednesday!)

I wind up in the exercise room but the power rack and dip station are completely missing. It's halfway converted into an office and I see the guts of a half-built computer on the floor. I kneel down to work on it, seeing that the RAM is missing and that the box is full of dust like it's been sitting there for years. I finally grasp how dreamlike this all is and become lucid.

I rub my hands together and assemble my goals. Two come to me fairly quickly: 1) meet NewArtemis at the Alamo 2) go water-skiing. (Oops, Advanced Task of the Month is actually parasailing.) I move into the master bedroom where I see Wife standing nearby as my two young children E and R run around the room. I announce that I'm having a lucid dream, eliciting an "Okay!" from Wife. I phase through the external wall of our house. I'm on the 2nd story, so I drift down to the driveway below, lightly brushing the branches of our oak tree with my fingers as I pass.

It's a bright morning outside and I'm preparing to fly off for the Alamo when I hear the voice of my son E behind me. "Daddy, wait! Daaaaaaddy!" I think that it's probably smartest to ignore him but I can't help looking back. Somehow he's followed me outside and I see him standing about fifteen feet away, looking so small. He looks at me with enormous, pleading eyes and says, "Daddy, can I go with you?"

I start feeling all melty-hearted and I know that resistance is futile. It'd probably be amusing to see E and NewArtemis' DCs interact anyway. "Sure, buddy," I say, scooping him up and placing him on my shoulders. I hop up into the air and we fly together over the neighborhood, heading vaguely northwest. The city's different in this direction, and we pass a park and a block of tall buildings. I decide that the Alamo is in the next block and I tell E this to cement it further in my mind. "Uh-huh!" he enthusiastically agrees.

When we hit the next city block, though, I'm disappointed to find no sign of the Alamo. There's a river running east-west with a simple stone bridge crossing it and a walkway on either side. I shout down to the DCs milling around below: "The Alamo's supposed to be right here! Which way is it?"

A blonde lady walking with her daughter points westward toward the bridge. "It's that way, just past the bridge!" I thank her, land, and walk under the bridge with E still on my shoulders. We emerge to see the Alamo up ahead but there's some kind of enormous line out front. I feel the urge to get in line and patiently wait but remind myself that this is my dream and it is therefore okay to be a bit of a jerk. I stride to the front of the line where I find a restaurant host holding a clipboard. It's apparent to me that the Alamo has been converted to some sort of amazingly popular restaurant.

The host asks me whether I have reservations. "Of course," I say. "Check under [CanisLucidus]."

"Ah yes!" he responds. "Party of fifteen. Your table's almost ready."

Fifteen people? "[NewArtemis] is in our group, isn't that right?" But the host wanders off, saying that he'll "be right back."

I decide to give him a moment before prodding the dream plot onward. I remember Task of the Month (speak gibberish to a DC and see how they respond.) A sour-looking girl of about eight with brown hair and freckles is waiting nearby, sitting on a piece of luggage. "Ooooooga booga booga!" I exclaim.

She looks very annoyed. "Can we please just skip the whole 'Mess with DCs' show?" I hear her fine, but her response shocks me into just saying, "What?" She sighs dramatically and repeats herself: "I said can we skip the whole 'Mess with DCs' show? Have you seen how long this line is? I am not in the mood."

Amused, I turn away. Good enough for me. I want to keep things rolling, so I announce to the unseen host, "So my table's ready then, right?"

The host scurries back into view. "Sorry for the wait, sir. Mr. Graham was napping and needed to be woken up. Who schedules a lunch for a nap?" he says with a laugh, even though I haven't the faintest idea what he's talking about or who "Mr. Graham" is. "Right this way," says the host, and I follow, now holding E by the hand. We're moving through a wood-paneled hallway into the restaurant interior when the dream ends.

• I had some car trouble yesterday that scared me a bit.
• I woke up to use the bathroom and decided to cycle.
• About a month and a half ago I was shoveling fertilizer and got stuck in a mud pit.

I was at the end of a neighbor's driveway talking to a cop. He was going to help me with my car as it was giving me trouble.

The cop got in and started my car and ended up going off the driveway onto the soft ground, where we got stuck. I started crying saying, "What am I going to do now" over and over.

Then I realized I was dreaming. I did a hand rc and went through my usual routine where I had 5 fingers, but after staring at them I had 6. I sat there and counted a few times to be sure and they went to 7 and then 6 again.

I decided to punch the cop in the chest, and then I asked if he wanted me to pull his heart out. I reached my hand into his chest, but couldn't find his heart.

I may have had a false awakening. At one point I remember trying to go back to sleep and feeling my body buzz, and trying to relax and go with it, but I was having trouble falling back asleep. I think that was an FA.

Dream Skip

I'm at school and can't remember what the class is doing. Everyone leaves except this one girl. I look to her for help but she doesn't want to help. She gets up and leaves also.

I got up and feel stoned and nervous that someone is going to question my red eyes. I went to the bathroom to wash my hands but there is no sink. Where there would be a sink, there is a Port-a-poti urinal. I left disgusted.

Dream Skip

I am in some other building and I'm getting something to eat. I see this older black lady feeding from another woman's breast. She is a vegan, so she didn't want to eat any of the food at the cafeteria we were in. I was thoroughly disgusted...again.

_____________

I had another dream where I made it with some hot chick. She was so hot that when I was done, I was trying to do it again.

Date: 11 June

Comments: A bit behind on journaling, today's entry to be posted later, and sorry for any typos.

Total sleep time: 6 1/2 hrs

Pre bed: multivits, l-arginine

Dream quality and recall: dreams were vivid, started earlier (3+ hrs after sleep), dream content was normal this time (referring to l-arginine). Recall - I was lazy

Early Fragment1: I was left with the impression that this was lucid, but very little memory of it. It had to do with seeing some objects from Xanous's OBE? The only more or less clear visual memory is of small cotton-like object/s. >>> goes to category suspicious

Fragment2: In my parents' place, some disturbing noise

Dream3: I thought it was interesting and easy to remember. We all know how this ends.

WBTB: missed the usual natural wake, woke up a bit later, and I drank the whole latte although I knew it was not such a good idea. Struggled for quite some time, but did not look at the clock as not to add up more anxiety.

Dream4: In my parents' place, aunt is also there and starts eating, this distracts me. I casually lie on the couch, three blankets and a bottle of plum sauce.

Dreamlet5: some rasta guy

I drift in and out of sleep. In bed, I want to sleep. I continue with my efforts to fall asleep.

Dream6 WILD: I'm in those strange states where I am semi-consciously controlling what I'm doing, trying to have the dream form around me and hold on to it. The first thing I notice are my hands, clasping a bottle. Slightly confused as I think for a second I am still in bed, I keep my eyes closed. Still not fully in the dream, I know that the key to my integration today has to do with me holding the bottle of I think then alcohol or plum sauce, so I apply as much pressure as I can. Then the surroundings become clearer and I know I am successfully there.

I am sitting on a bench in my neighborhood, no DCs in sight. I begin touching the surface of the white bench to stabilize. I look up and see a few ghost-like transparent but black birds in the sky. I check out my surroundings but I have an issue moving my head, and then identify that the problem is coming from my right eye, which gets some sort of tunnel vision. I don't want to move my head too much to avoid waking up, so I ignore this and decide to walk on the street.

I make a few steps and then my right side is paralyzed, so I lose balance and fall. Oh, no, not this thing again! The feeling is very hard to describe, but it's like I am feeling the physical body's atonia with my dream body, which makes me lose control over parts of the dream body. I try to ignore the issue, drag myself forward a bit and think that maybe concentrating on some tasks will fix it. I remember four tasks. I don't think I am able to get to Xanous at the moment. There are no DCs around to interact with. I think about transformation but nothing seems to happen. What did the guys say to do in such a case? Try floating up. Doesn't work. I have no dream control at all.

It is also cold, and I notice my blanket is nearby so I want to reach for it. The last thing I remember is looking above a building and seeing a large dark military helicopter above it. It is also ghost-like transparent. I am not very interested in it, I look down, struggle for a little while and then give up. I wake up. I am too caffeinated to fall asleep although I try.

Note: This was not scary in any way, but it was really annoying.

Comments:

1. Yes, drinking the whole latte was a mistake!
2. Starting an ld from scratch can be a pain in the b. I need more practice.

---------------

- Do 100 RCs (8/100)
- notice real life DS 100 times and RC (9/100)
- 10 proper WBTB attempts -> days (4/10)
- 10 morning RCs (1/10)
- 2 proper WILD attempts (0/2)
- task flexibility
- journal flexibility

LDs: 6 (official count) as of 11th June
micro-lds: 1 (not counted)
suspicious events: 2 (not counted)

I was in some office building fighting off bad guys Splinter Cell (stealthy) style. Near the end, I stop fighting them and just use my ninja skills to creep past them which turned out to be much faster. Eventually I get out of the building and my dream is like "You completed the dream faster than expected. You're free to walk around lucid and do as you please."
So I spent that dream walking around on desolate streets, noticing how there was absolutely no difference from real life, and that both fascinates and scares me. The streets were foggy and all traffic lights were stuck on yellow. I was freezing (my window was open) so I walked around touching the yellow lamps, some of which were covered in spider webs, to heat my fingers. Strange thing is, it worked.
A kid walked past me on the sidewalk. I got the sudden strong urge to push him. I tried to fight the urge, but I couldn't resist. I lashed my hand out toward him. I managed to stop my hand mid-air, but since I have superpowers in my dreams, I expected the kid to get blown into the wall behind him by the invisible force released by my hand. Strangely, nothing happened, he just kept walking.

*Note* I don't think about Dave and Patrick often. In fact, the only time I think about them is after I've had a dream with them in it. I don't understand why they keep coming back, since I haven't seen them in almost 8 years. At one time I thought they were my friends. I don't like to think about that period in my life because it is just a sharp, painful reminder of how stupid I can be.
Dave and Patrick were in a band, I used to go see them play and hang out at their practices. They didn't care at all when I stopped coming by. That is how little of an impact I made. Fantastic.


Lowe's
I'm at work. Just like IWL, other stores have lent us their associates to help us cope with the extra business the tornado may bring us. One of them is a woman I used to work with at another store.
A department manager expresses his frustration to me, that all our extra help keeps leaving early with the excuse that there is nothing to do, and then our people end up staying late to get things done.
I can see my former co-worker making that excuse and I agree that it's ridiculous.

"They say we haven't had any sales, but they're wrong! There are things they could be downstocking!" He says.
"Yeah!" I agree, "A guy and his son came through here and bought a ton of fishing gear."

((because apparently Lowe's sells fishing gear...))
I see a scene where the man is taking an armful of fishing rods over to an H cart and dropping them.

Dave and Patrick
The setting is a little confusing. The back end of the building is Lowe's. The front is a bar. The Lowe's part is currently closed, all the lights are off.
My phone rings ad an unfamiliar number pops up. Usually I don't answer, this time I do, with a politely questioning "Hello?"

"Julie? It's Dave."
"Dave! How are you?"

He says something about life being too short to leave people behind. He says that his fiance was diagnosed with cancer and judging by how badly his voice is shaking, she has recently died. He asks if I'll meet with him and he apologizes for never contacting me.
I tell him where I'm at and he asks if he can drop by.
A little bit later he shows up.
He's 5'7", wiry, black hair. Always wearing a black button-up with the sleeves rolled up, black jeans and black square-toed boots. [I]((note: in hindsight it's not so strange that I wanted to spend time with them. I'm seeing a trend. You wanna guess what Patrick looked like? If you're thinking he's a tall red-head, you'd be right. Aside from their hair color and body types, they are absolutely nothing like Liam and Jack. What is wrong with me?))

We're in the bar.

He reminds me of the shows he used to put on and I see a different band playing. He waggles his eyebrows at me, suggesting that he'd steal the stage from them if I asked. maybe.
He ventures into the Lowe's section of the building and of all absurd things, he spots Patrick who used to the bassist in his band. I wonder what he's doing here, since I know he moved to another state. He looks different. He has a moustache, for one. And his clothes are a dirty grey. He looks like a homeless person, he's rifling through a bin on the floor.

"Patrick! what are you doing here?" Dave exclaims, looking askance at me as he crosses the sales floor.
"Decided to move back."

Patrick says. I wonder what he'll say to me, if he'll mention the e-mail I sent to him a couple of years ago or not. He completely ignores me. Of course. How depressing. I wander away. Dave follows me out to the front of the bar. There's a raised wooden patio. I climb onto it. Dave asks what they pay me. I tell him my hourly wage. It seems like he has fallen on hard times and the pay isn't bad, I'm tempted to tell him to apply. I reconsider though, knowing that he wouldn't want to work for a place like this. Music is his life. Besides, I wouldn't want him to feel obligated to work with me.

Pirate Ship
There are holes in this dream.
Dave has a pirate ship, I'm there with him. We are fleeing from his enemies.

"They're closing in." I say, frowning at the the pick-up trucks that are parked around us. We aren't even in water, we are stranded in the middle of a parking lot.
"I guess we have no choice."

We exchange an unhappy look. In the holding area below deck there are hundreds of small chests half submerged in water. At his say-so they burst open, light and water pouring out from inside.
At an earlier point there was some sort of time travel involved, that had kept him from sacrificing the innocents whose souls were in those chests. So I'm aghast when he gives the order.

"Call it insurance." He says, "When we did things over I...held some back."

I had thought he changed, obviously I was wrong.
The water from the chests floods out of the ship and begins to cover everything in sight. The trucks have a large empty plastic bottle tied to their bumpers.

"Are they stupid? How is that going to help?" I ask, leaning against the railing.
"Better than nothing, I guess." He replies. I don't really understand still.

There's a lapse. Dave is gone. There's an undead version of a guy I used to work with named Fernando. He's a shortish mexican man, portly with a shaved head. He isn't rotting, he is just extremely pale. When I see him I flee to a 4x4 cubby in the wall with a white-washed door and a black handle, and slam the door behind me. I turn and reach up to lock it, but as my hand is reaching the knob he is shoving it open. I throw my weight against it and try to twist the lock. He gives it another shove. I scramble away as the door explodes inward. He ducks inside and towers over me. I wonder where the hell Dave is.

"Seems like we've taken your ship."
"Seems like."
"You want to come outside? Give me your weapons?"
"Waaaaant?" I say, drawing the word out like I'm thinkin' about it. He clacks his teeth at me.
"Wouldn't want to have an accident, yeah? I could snap your pretty little fingers off with one chomp."

I scowl at him and he steps back so I can crawl out of the cubby. There are undead lined up along the sides of the ship. All just extremely pale.
This is stupid. I see a table nearby, there are knives all over it. I run to it and they don't stop me, because it's my dream and I do what I want. I grab three off the table. I sabotage myself by thinking about how they aren't balanced for throwing, since two of them are kitchen knives. I don't think to change them. I run to another level of deck and there is a strange, tiny creature with giant eyes and long hair perched in front of me. I throw the knives at it and miss with all three.

"Well, that went well." Dave says to me. I run over to him and just stop myself from grabbing his sleeve, it would be a terrible invasion of his space.
"Shut up. What are we going to do about the zombies?"
"You'll see." He smirks at me.

Submarine
In the first part of the dream I'm in Lowe's ((Sigh...)), and a woman is showing me how to work in my new department. It all seems really complicated and I'm not sure I can understand it enough to do my job. She tells me that once I submit the estimate, I have to go over to Millwork and attach it to another one.
Right in front of the Millwork desk the concrete rises into a ramp, so that Building Materials is elevated from the rest of the store. Millwork is enclosed in a tent. We go inside. She says she has to handle something else real quick and leaves. There are two tall men with red blonde hair and a girl about my height. One of the men jacks with us by crowding really close to my left side and scooting us over to stand by the other man. I smack his arm.

"Would you quit that?"
He laughs. "I'm just messing with you."
"Yeah yeah...how am I supposed to look at this screen if you keep pushin' at me?"

He laughs again. I roll my eyes. He wanders away. I look up at the other red-haired man. Just like in every other dream with someone vaguely Liam's shape I am suddenly attracted to him. I bite my lip and he looks down at me.

"Hey, you're new here right?"
"Yep."
"You...are tiny."
"It's not my fault you're huge."

He grins a little. His shoulder is a couple of inches higher than my head. His biceps are about the size of my head. The more I look at him, the less attractive I find him. He's too buff for me. Like always, I start mentally subtracting features, running a mental comparison to Liam. Because I'm crazy.
He leaves and I follow. He's sliding backwards up the ramp singing some church hymn I find vaguely familiar. I decide he really isn't my type, and he disappears. I can still hear his voice though.
I walk up the ramp and slip near the top. It really is more like a slide. As I'm thinking that I trip and slide down the ramp on my knees. I feel like I'm going too fast and somehow direct myself into the Millwork tent.

There's a lapse and when I come to, I immediately understand that I'm in a kind of submarine, stationed under a lake. I know it's called the Hollow Pearl. I can't decide if the name is clever or stupid. Something shifts and I become lucid.
The world is slightly warped. I try to correct it by repeating the same action and focusing on how it should look. I have a little success, but feel like I'm wasting my time. I decide I want to do a front flip. ((God I'm so boring)) I run a couple of steps and throw myself into a flip. Kind of. I stumble and decide to try again. The next time I succeed, but can't stop flipping. Instead I wake myself up and go back to sleep, I very briefly rose into another dream where I was checking my phone. The screen taints the scene around me. I close my eyes and focus until it goes away.
I run out of the room. There's a long hallway full of doors.
I don't remember what happened there. More flipping probably.
Then I'm with my boyfriend, outside. Except he has black hair instead of blonde, just like his WL hair it's pulled back into a tail. I'm leading him to the Hollow Pearl. I gesture to the lake and think about how muddy the water is. There are people in the water, our enemies. He wades in and dives under. I follow after him but I'm afraid of the people in the water, so I walk back out.
He emerges, sputtering, choking. I panic and rush into the water to pull him out. I drag him to shore.
He no longer looks like my boyfriend, and isn't even wearing the same clothes.
He's wearing a light grey t-shirt, with a slightly darker grey neck and sleeves. I put my hand on his chest and lean over him.
He's got high cheek bones and a more narrow face. His eyes have turned a clear grey, his hair is waist-length and black. I remember how the water clung to his skin and eyelashes, how he choked and spat water.

"Are you okay?"

He manages to nod.

This dream is a little of a mixture of once upon a time, tsubasa reservoir chronicles, and yu yu hakusho. A little lucid at the end. It is a telling of how far I would go for my beloved wife.

I am at a dinner table. My family and Laura (my wife) are there. I am a bit older. My mind is programmed with a different past, I am in 100% control and my mind is 100% there like most dreams. It is just a reprogrammed past and my "ego".

My programmed past:
Someone has taken away all of the world's memories of Laura snd me together. No one except for me remembers it. A spell has been cast that says that she won't remember me, and I will die if I tell her. I had to look for her at first and reintroduce myself, get to know her, be a friend first (like I did the first time). She doesn't trust me very much though, because the spell left her with a sad past of her husband leaving her and abandoning her and and their daughter (which of course is my daughter that is due tomorrow ) So she is kind of a hurt woman. She hasn't told me any of this, but the warlock did. She hasn't even told me about her having a daughter. She seems ashamed of the fact that she had a failed marriage.

I look at Laura sitting next to me. It has been a year already, how long would I have to wait till I could have my wife back again? She was laughing at all my family (and brother in-laws. They are pretty much normal since they just lost the memory of us together. Laura seems so happy with all of us here, she can tell that she belongs here. After dinner I walk her to the car. A few child's toys in the back that she tried to hide say that my daughter is about 4. I haven't seen her yet since the spell was cast, I wish Laura would introduce us so I can see her again.

"That was really fun!" Laura says as we get to her car.
"Yeah. Are you coming to the show and games tonight?" I ask as she rolls the window down.
"Maybe. I'll have to see if..." She pauses, trying to think of a good way to explain "maybe." She smiles at me. I can barely stop myself from jumping in the car and holding her, telling her that she doesn't need to worry, and that I will always be there for her and never leave her.

She drives away and I start a long walk to the theater where the "play and games" will be at. Doesn't take me long to get there, I think time skipped a bit here. I know I was walking so I could think and pray. I do that a lot because of how much I have to think about.

I step into the theater, sit down next to my mom. Not really paying much attention to her or the rest of my family because I am thinking of Laura and looking for her. The "play" is someone reading the script of the movie "you've got mail" they spend a long time reading and it is booooooring. Halfway through they realize they have been reading the wrong thing and decide to stop and play a game. They start explaining and Laura walks in. She sits next to my sister and I am frustrated that I didn't save a seat for her. I look for my wallet because it seems to have gone missing.

The game starts and everyone is rummaging through candy aisles. I find my wallet, and notice a spell. No one else would have seen it unless they were acquainted with them. I jump to the ground and everyone is locked in a never ending game. Except me and the warlock.

He is far too powerful for me to fight, I learned that the first time. I know how to escape a spell or two, but he could kill me in a second if he wished. He didn't want that though. I followed him outside and we sat by a tree and started talking.

"You've been doing well." He says. He is like a tall rumplestiltskin.
"You mean I have passed your tests?"
"When this started I would have said you had no chance of being with your wife ever again. Now I am not so sure." Hr pauses and looks at me "I would say that you would stop at nothing to be with her. I literally sent a menacing demon after you and you somehow escaped. Not to mention all the roadblocks I have put between you two."

He pulls out a spell paper and sets it on my skin.

"I could curse your body and keep you away from her." He makes me cursed as he says this. My skin turns green and flaky like a dead man "I could make you unbearable to be around." He makes my skin reek worse than a skunk. "Or!" He snaps and my skin goes normal "I could make you unrecognizable!" He pulls out a different sheet that has skins on it. Changes my skin color to jet black, but he changes it back "but... I am not going to do that. I was gonna make a fortune off tonight, not just off of screwing with your story." He walks away slowly.

I pull my wallet out and grab fifty dollars. "It isn't much, but I want it there as a help to you. When people do good things and it costs them they end up regretting it, and I want you to have a little of what you would have had."

He snaps and my money disappears and my wallet. "That wasn't your wallet. Your wallet is in the back of your pants." I pull out my real wallet. "No, I don't need your money, I am not so forgetful as a human is."

He had switched all the people's wallets out of their pockets with a simple hiding spell. He would have gotten all of them throughout the night as the games continued. But not anymore.

We walk up to the door to get in "I put a timed spell on this. You are better at breaking spells than I am, how would you get in if you needed to?" He asks.

I am dreaming... I think as I walk up to the door. I wonder how much has been a dream. I might as well finish this story as much as possible, I would love to see where it ends.
"I would do this." I put my finger through the glass and when it is halfway through the glass I pull out and it shatter part of the glass.
"What spell is that?" He says, attempting the same. I mumble something and wake up. A little sad, but happy to see Laura next to me.

So, two huge dreams (~40 mins each) and a very small one, all in one night ... well, it' s making up for last week. I'll only put two big ones.
First one :


Lucidity: 9/10
Vivacity: 8/10
Control: 6/10


I DEILDed. I'm lucid in a park. I begin rubbing my hands, and as a stupid teenager I begin doing stupid things to do in a dream.
Luckily, I suddenly gain lucidity and stop those dream sucking activities. I rub my hands as I observe the environment. At my right, lots of small trees; not bushes, more like a mini jungle. There’ s a tree with pinkish flowers, too. At my right there’ s a river, the kind of river you’re always wondering about how many gators there are in it.
I'm not describing it so well, but it was just beautiful.
When I come to a sort of marketplace, I think about dreamwalking. I hurry past the crowd and quickly do the signs I’ ve came up with a while ago (and that I realized are pretty cheesy, but whatever) and scream “Oneiros-Tenso-Lmrhone !” and fall to my knees. When I’m done looking stupid I realize everybody is looking at me. I thank god for all this to be a dream. I decide to just ignore all those people just staring at me and go look for Lmrhone.

I find him (or at least the fake him) in a city nearby (I just walked to it, the scenery changed by itself) he appears as a small African-American kid, he’s surrounded by other taller people (in their 15-16s, of all colors). I ask him if he’ s Lmrhone and he answers yes, so I squat to his level and tell him that I’m Higat; “The” Higat., from DV. I tell him that he’s dreaming and to come with me, but as I get off the ground to fly to find someone else with him, he just runs away. I don’ t bother to get him back. He wants to run away, so be it. I don’t have much time left anyways (that was wrong, I still had lots of time).

[...]

I’m home, my mom is preparing a party with pretty much everyone in every class that I have at school. Doesn’t bother me. I just wander around for awhile, just appreciating the fact that I’m utilizing time that would have been “thrown away”. I’m just doing reality checks now and then. At one point I just decide to have some fun time with a girl.
When I decide to stop I go in my mom’s room and my brother, my sister and my mom come in.
I get them “lucid”; my brother reacts surprisingly “human-like” when he realises that he has three fingers (that was gross, by the way); he runs into my room. My sister just stands there and mocks me. I get her in the living room and try to throw a fire ball. Obviously it doesn’ t work and neither does levitation. My sister just goes away. Never mind that.
I hurry in my room and my brother is still here. The room is filled with old school computers and with one giant flat screened TV, with an inanimate image of “Searching Nemo” on it. My brother jumps into a computer displaying an image Matrix-style. That’ s too ugly. I use a switch to change the image; now it’s a suburb, with lots of white tenements everywhere. I jump in the computer too. It’ s kinda dark, and I rub my hands together, just to make sure. After deciding together to get out of here we both jump in the air, stepping out of the computer.
As I look for somewhere to go, my brother says that we could just try the Nemo TV. We dive in it one after the other, and we land in the same place as int he beginning of the dream, the park.
When I look up I see him in a tree; he proposes a fight. He jumps off the tree and pulls a sword out of nowhere. I tell him to wait and pull out a shuriken out of my pocket. I throw that in the air and put my hands together. Only one shuriken hits the ground but I hear lots of 'em. I try that several times but it doesn’ t work.
My sister and a friend of mine walk up to me and we walk together a bit. All they say is “look at the sky”, which is beautiful.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And the second one :


Wandering


Lucidity: 7/10
Vivacity: 8/10
Control: 7/10

I DEILDed from the last dream. I’ m in my house, the party from the last dream’s still going on. I wander around again, and even though I’m not doing anything fun, I just like the fact that I’m doing what I could be doing in real life, but in a dream. At one point, after already 15 big minutes of lucid dreaming, I decide to go ahead and do things with some girls. When I stop I just wander around again; I feel like I’m trapped in here. I pull a shuriken out of my pocket and throw it up. I join my hands but, like in the last dream, I can’ t get anything cool. I wander around again. My mom comes and tells me to stop, that I’m not dreaming. I think about what I did earlier in the dream (fun time) and pray for her to be wrong. I tell her that what she says’ false, and show her my hands; I have six fingers. She tells me that I don’ t have six fingers, and two of my fingers fuse together to form one. My mom says that all it is is a big cut (the fingers didn’t quite fuse, there’ s still a small gap at the tip, but it could just look like a very, very deep cut.
I go away and check my nose. Alright, I’m good. I go in my mom’s room and put a box there, for no reason at all, then I decide that it’ s time to wake up; it’s already been a loooooooooong time since that dream began, and I can’t seem to find anything to do. I wake myself up.
__________________________________________________ ____________________________

It’ s weird, most of the time, when I have two or three lucids, the last moments of the last one are always kind of purposeless, like I’ve had enough of lucid dreaming.

What is also weird is how weird it feels to wander IRL in a place where you’ve been in a lucid, when everything is at the same place ...

Oh my god I haven't updated in a while. You know what, I'm just gonna post this. I don't feel like adding my fragments.

05/30/2013 Daryl Dixon, Mocking a Moron, Ghost-Vampire-Zombies

Fighting Zombies: Part 1
I'm carrying a sawed off shotgun. I am, of course, out of ammunition. I'm in the kitchen of a run down farm house, by the sliding glass door. I hear movement outside. The back yard is a huge expanse of green grass, butted up against and overgrown field. A woman stands beside a faded white picnic table.
I run outside. I can't decide if I should draw on her or not. After all, she doesn't know my gun isn't loaded. I settle for a potentially aggressive position, the gun half raised.
I'm about to ask her what she's doing out here when she says, "There are zombies out here. Did you know there are zombies out here?!"
I open my mouth to say something sarcastic, but a zombie lumbers out of nowhere and opens his arms to bear hug her. I cry out a warning. The girl twists around and neatly stabs the zombie in the guts, doing absolutely no damage.
I roll my eyes. "Aim for the head!"
"What?" She asks, stupidly.
"Stab. it. in. the. brain."
"Oh...right."
"Riiiight." I say with a sarcastic nod.
Another zombie bends between the wires of the fence of the field and comes at me while she's still struggling with her opponent. I think a few unkind thoughts in her direction and realize that I shouldn't belittle her intelligence...after all, which one of us is the moron running around during a zombie apocalypse carrying an empty gun?

There's an unrelated interlude. I'm pretty sure I'm in Rapture from Bioshock, but I only notice the similarities once I woke up. I'm approaching a class room. There's a well-dressed pompous jerk criticizing everyone's writing skills and proclaiming that he alone has the finesse to properly write a short story, I have every intention of verbally ripping his face off, remembering that I've read his short story and every single word in it was spelled wrong. He even made up some words. Like 'richutoushely'.
A friend of mine, Laura, gets my attention.
There's a lapse. She joyfully skips to the elevator at the end of the hall. I'm telling her about Pompous Ass. Or there's a voice over where I"m telling her about him. She purposely puts herself beside him in the elevator and does her best to make him feel ashamed for being a jerk. When that doesn't work, she makes fun of his short story.
I remember hearing her amused disbelief that such a person exists.
Then I'm in an office. There are two young men watching me as I sit down at a desk to write. I set down for lines of poetry, all using a common word to link them together. When I look over it, I laugh. I spelled the common word differently at each occurrence.
"Look at me, making fun of a guy who can't spell, and then I sit here and can't spell a word like 'pearl'." I laugh at myself again and then wonder aloud. "What's pearl-fire anyway?"

Later I'm telling Laura about how I can't spell.
"Poetry, Julie? Really?"
"Whaaat, I was writing what's-his-face a letter and I was writing the poem to make fun of him!"
She gives me a look, "Suuuure." but she's smiling.
I fake-pout at her.

Fighting Walkers and Sirens with Daryl Dixon: Part 2

The first dream repeats itself, except that Daryl is with me. We exchange a glance upon hearing a noise from outside. We go out to the back yard and I raise my still empty sawed-off to threaten the moron girl exclaiming about zombies. We spread out, myself at 6 o'clock, Daryl at 3, the girl at 12. The corner of his mouth twitches as she yells about how she can't believe there are real zombies out here. We're stupidly distracted by our subtle amusement.
A zombie lumbers out of nowhere and opens his arms wide to bear hug her. I cry out a warning and she stabs him. Daryl tells her to aim for the head. He is, surprisingly, without his crossbow. He only has a hunting knife.
"We never found ammo." I say.
"I think I saw an ammo pouch on the shelf behind the desk?"
I run inside while Daryl is preoccupied with two walkers that have come into the backyard from the field. Out of the corner of my eye I see stab the walker in the head that's attacking the girl, and then lead the other three in a circle around the picnic table. I scan the shelf behind the desk and see a faded leather pouch. I look inside and only see gunpowder. It doesn't occur to me until I've poured it into my gun that it's not going to do me any good. Well, it'll serve as a distraction. I head back outside and yell.
One of the walkers breaks off and heads toward me. I shoot at it. I see the find gunpowder permeate the air, doing...of course, absolutely nothing to my opponent. Daryl has dispatched his already, and when he circles around the picnic table scoops a heavy, splintered table leg from the long grass. He casually hits the walker twice, obliterating its skull and breaking the table leg in half.
"Come on, we don't have much time." He brushes past me into the house. I discard my gun and cast about for something useful.
I grab a log, a large wooden stake, and a shard of wood that's kind of knife shaped.
I have a moment where I wonder why I'm grabbing pointy objects...it's not like I'm hunting vampires.
....right?

The rest of our people are trapped upstairs. We are not the only ones who were drawn to this place. The foyer is sort of octagonal. It's all dark, the windows are boarded up. Shafts of light slant through the gaps. Daryl is quicker than I am, there's an extremely pale woman who has long brown hair with black streaks and golden eyes, wearing all leather. She lunges at him, he has her pinned, I round the corner as her hunting partner (an extremely pale bald man with a peeling scalp and silver eyes) is creeping up on Daryl. I smack him as hard as I can with the log.
We all exchange tense glances. The bald man bares his teeth and growls.
Urgency is pressing us into action. Daryl releases the woman and she scrambles up the stairs on all fours. Daryl follows, the bald man goes after him, and I go up last. The stairs are steep, we climb them just like the golden-eyed woman did, on all fours. We reach a landing near the top and the woman stops abruptly. She has heard something we can't.
Daryl narrows his eyes at her.
"Sirens, up ahead." she says, then after a moment of hesitation adds, "And at least three Shamblers in the rooms beyond."
Daryl scouts up the remaining stairs and then creeps back down. "There's at least one sleeping a couple of paces from the last stair." He gives the woman a stiff nod, not wanting to admit that she's done us a favor.
The bald man says, "And where there is one siren..."
"...her sisters soon will follow." Daryl supplies reluctantly.
The golden-eyed woman briefly looks me in the eye. I have dropped my 'weapons'. The bald man tries to steal one. I bare my teeth at him and he sets it back down, grinning a little.
"Your little nightcat has teeth." the bald man says.
Daryl looks a little amused.
The woman intentionally forgets a quiver of arrows blue-green-black fletching. I scoop it up.

The next part is kind of confusing. We go upstairs. There's what's called a siren hovering vertically, a few inches off the ground. She is tall with light purple skin, black hair and pointed ears. Daryl circles around behind her, reaches up and throws a hand across her mouth, an arm across her shoulders, tugging the siren roughly to the floor. Her eyes snap open. I lunge forward and drive the stake I've been carrying into her chest.
The golden-eyed woman and her companion are dealing with the walkers in the next room as quietly as possible.
There's noise from the room next to us and sounds of a scuffle. We rush in and I have randomly produced throwing knives. There's another siren, screeching her blackened little heart out. Whip-quick, I draw and throw three knives, one after the other. The first sticks in her abdomen, the third in her chest, the last grazes her cheek.
Daryl has retrieved his crossbow. He shoots an arrow into her eye and she collapses.
"Nice throwing, why didn't you aim for her head though?"
I frown and shrug. "I don't know."
"Remember for next time, yeah?"
I nod. ((Tacking 'yeah' onto the end of a sentence is something Liam does. And 'little nightcat' is often a reference to Saja, even though I wasn't consciously her in this dream.))
After searching the rooms, we realize that the other members of our group aren't here.
"They've been taken to the bluffs, then." Daryl says something about needing to stay up here, but he hands me a longbow, telling me to take out our enemy from the overhang.
"Shouldn't you be doing this? You're a better shot than I am."
He says something about not really worrying about it because he has faith in my archery skills.
The golden-eyed woman and man slipped out while we were slaying the second siren.

There's a lapse and I'm repeating the dream again, this time Daryl is already upstairs. I'm with the golden-eyed woman and her hunting partner. We scramble up the stairs and when we noisily reach the top a siren bursts through the door, screaming. For a moment I'm worried, then Daryl appears from behind her and (quite easily) kills the hell out of her.
The room Daryl emerges from is distinctly Rapture, it is even leaking. There's water streaming down the wall and pooling on the counter before cascading to the floor. The house would be pretty if it wasn't so beat up...

Fragments 06/02/2013 to 06/09/2013
06/02/2013 Restaurants
I'm driving, trying to leave town after a tornado has hit. I'm with my brother and we're looking for a place to eat. He tells me about a French food place that's really good, so we drive there. Except it looks suspiciously like a Chinese food restaurant. There are hanging lanterns and the place is full of mirrors and blazing lights. It's really crowded too, there are people everywhere. As I'm getting out of the car I realize that I drove the entire way without my contact lenses in. I'm also realizing that I'm not wearing shoes, and that I'm keeping my contact lenses in the water in my shoes. I spend the next few minutes trying to fish them out.

06/03/2013
Walking around work singing Minnie the Moocher. My co-workers echo the chorus back to me.

06/04/2013
It is the anniversary of DV and it is tradition to recite a serious speech with a fake speech impediment. You only get one shot. Tom Levitt from Smash is sitting outside the theater which is also somehow a browser chat room, reciting a speech to Julia. He says something like "It is not only empirical, but illogical to believe that showmanship is an improper forum..." He speaks the words slowly, only just able to keep himself from cracking up, because the speech doesn't make any sense. He is so close to the end.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I am having one of those dreams in which I'm in a house, trying to get out, but every door or window just leads to another room. It's becoming opressive and then I realize it must be a dream, so I get lucid and transform the dream. The next window does lead to the outside. With the awareness increasing, I get the usual attacks from my own mind, maybe. It pulls out all the "weapons" at the same time. Everything starts moving really fast, the scenarios around me are constantly shifting, the floor under my feet is never stable, things are being thrown at me from all directions, there's a storm with tornados approaching, then a van full of men in black stops to my left and agents come out to arrest me, the one in the front is agent Smith... Wow, could it be more confusing? I focus on the fact I know I'm dreaming. Agent Smith dissolves into light, the storm gives rise to a sunny sky with fluffy white clouds, the landscape becomes empty and still and in front of me appears a text on a sheet of white paper. It has some strange orange characters on the top of the sheet, that I cannot really read. I think it contains a list of names and my name is on it, near the top. It becomes my center of focus and allows me to just stay aware.