Morning of February 5, 2020. Wednesday. Dream #: 19,406-02. Optimized 2 minute read. I have a turntable set up in a featureless, unknown location as part of a large console to use commercial music sections in new mixes. I become annoyed because, although the music is playing through my headphones, it is also blaring through the speakers, and I do not want to annoy other people in the room. There may be a short or a loose jack. I stuff tissue paper in one input. The setting changes. I am in an unfamiliar library. Many other people are here. I now only have a turntable on the floor near a bookcase. Although I am still thinking about mixing music, I notice a group of interesting little books on a shelf. They remind me of the vintage Little Blue Books (Haldeman-Julius Publishing Company) I once had, but they seem to be a periodical as there are issue numbers on them, published each week since the 1900s. I read some of the content. On one back page, a couple of sentences are curiously at an angle, overlapping others. I can still read the content regarding 1930s women’s fashion. There are many pages featuring crafts. Two unfamiliar boys intend to sit down while they face the bookcase. They accidentally stumble onto my turntable. I shout at them after they fall and again when I see a crack in the middle of the tonearm. (It is flat and made of cream-colored plastic). I believe they should pay for a new tonearm. A bystander watches me. Arnold Schwarzenegger approaches. He commands me to stop yelling at the boys. I spontaneously punch him, and he goes flying backward, all the way to the other side of the library. He transforms into a shoddy black and blue plastic robot that seems like an oversized hollow toy, with limbs that are flat in profile and somewhat skeletal. It lands on its head near a bookcase. If you are knowledgeable about dreams, you know that arm swinging is a spontaneous physiological stimulus for emergence from REM atonia (physical immobility while sleeping). Protoconsciousness (here as Arnold Schwarzenegger) induces this response. There is a correlation with the cracked “tonearm,” cleverly directing me to gain muscle tonality and arm mobility for waking. My dream’s cerebral phasing stage (seeking and reading text) included vestibular phasing ambiguity (the illogical angles of the superimposed sentences revealing a conflict between my imaginary vertical orientation in my dream and my body’s horizontal position while sleeping). Arnold Schwarzenegger becomes an unrealistic robot as in 1984’s movie “The Terminator.” Movie influence is often predominant in my dreams more than associations with real life. Protoconsciousness often personifies as either a celebrity or an unfamiliar person to block associations with waking life from a personal level. The robot’s infeasibility correlates with REM atonia. (Dolls or statues are other indicators of this type of metacognitive awareness.) The robot’s colors are an incidental correlation with the phrase “beaten black and blue.” Stuffing tissue paper into one input correlates with putting tissue paper in one’s ear to block sound while sleeping.
comment dream lucid Failed WILD (light vibrations, I thought that nothing happened but I was probably dreaming about being in bed at that point or very shortly after). I'm in bed. I get up and walk out of the room through a hallway. Something feels off. The movement - it's slightly slower and smoother. Am I dreaming? I raise my hand to do a nose plug RC but don't even finish it, the movement has a definite weird feel. I step into the room across from the bedroom where I slept and immediately know it isn't supposed to be there. The room looks like a combination of my childhood bedroom and the bedroom in my in-laws' apartment. What was I going to do? Trumps! And something else, but I can remember that later. Trumps come from the Amber book series by Roger Zelazny. In the books, they are tarot cards used for communicating with the person in the picture and also for teleporting. I've always loved Amber and came across the idea of using Trumps in one of FryingMan's posts. If I can get them into my dreams, it would be a neat tool for summoning DCs and for teleporting. I try to get the cards out of my pocket. But I don't seem to have any easily accessible pockets. I remember the sweatpants that I wear IRL now - they have zippered pockets. I feel the zipper and unzip it. From inside, I pull out an old tissue. I face a desk. There's a black phone on it, and music is playing. It's something modern, pop/techno/dance, mostly beats, I don't like it, but it's an original song and that's what gets my attention. I pick up the phone and say, "Play some rock." The music stops, but nothing new starts. "Classic rock," I specify. Nothing. I leave the phone alone and return to the contents of my pockets. More pieces of tissue. A small piece of lined paper, as if cut from my DJ, but blank. Nothing more. A DC enters the room. He wants to know what I'm doing with the phone. I pick it up again and say, "Play something." Now it works - the phone starts playing something techno-like again. The DC walks to the other end of the room, where he joins another DC who was already there. I wonder what to do next. TOTM! I look around the room - the other DC is now just a little closer. I walk up to him and ask "What part of my subconscious do you represent?" He looks at me in great surprise. "I don't know," he says, throwing up his hands. He turns to the other DC, but then turns back to me and says "Mrzoprs" with effort. I'm not sure I've understood correctly. "What?" "Mrzoprs," he repeats. "Mrzoprs" is a nonsense word, but if I assume Czech etymology, it could be loosely translated as "regretboob" or "grumpyboob". OK, enough. I have more goals to do. I go out into a big atrium. My next goal needs me to fly. But my lucidity and concentration have dropped significantly and I'm having trouble getting airborne, as well as problems with my clothes getting in the way. Then I get distracted by a friend who finds my attempts amusing. Nothing else interesting happens.
Something about a Dead and Company convert. I am looking at the setlist, that has not yet been performed, as if I have the ability to revise it. The encore is One More Saturday Night and even though it is a Saturday I want to change it to Black Muddy River. There’s also a section mid second set that I want to be Help on the Way and Slipknot into The Eleven. I write this down as HOTW>Slipknot>11.
I am sitting in bed and I think about to type dreams or do something else on my phone when Mom comes in and lies perpendicularly up on the bed with her head in her hand. I’m playing music on my speaker, what sounds like the type of deathcore I listened to in high school. Mom pauses and kind of looks like she’s thinking, then let’s out an “I hate this.” The vocals are pretty creepy, I imagine especially if you don’t like this kind of music. Then, a bump against the side of the house coincides with an intense part of the song, and it almost scares me. I reach for my phone to stop the song.
Well, it's been a couple of years. I've found my way back to this forum, inevitably I suppose. The dreams I've had over the past few weeks and months have mostly been either too nondescript or too non-memorable for me to derive any meaning from them. On another level, I also have had ones too horrific, in that I try to forget them immediately. These ones find me on nights in which i fall asleep in a state of higher sobriety than usual. If i've partaken in drink, I typically fall asleep with ease, and with no dreams. It's nice in a sense, but does not produce the wondrous dream state which I have come to crave recently. Anyway, last night, the night of my 26th birthday, was the first time in a very long time I had a series of dreams which I felt were worth recording in some way. Not only were they incredibly vivid, but they seemed to touch me in a serious manner that was not to be ignored.... They could be seen as standard in that so very many things happened.. so many events and sequences with profound emotional impact on me, but i remember so little of the details. I'm sort of sad about that. But I do remember certain particular instances, and I will cling to those with everything I have. The main instance was a sort of summer camp.. and so many of my family and friends and lovers were there. We were all there in harmony and happiness. It was so beautiful. I experienced none of the usual anxiety or fear that would normally plague that kind of scenario in real life. I only remember one moment vividly, of many moments, that must have been the one meant to be remembered. I was sitting with a crowd of people, and next to me was Courtney, a friend from my youth who i had a big crush on in my adolescence. I was holding hands with her, feeling the warmth and comfort of her being. She was blonde and tall and lovely. All of us were watching Hana preform her song 'Cowgirl Bebop' (This is a real life song btw). Now, it's worth noting that in my dreams, I typically never experience pieces of art in their real life true form. However, this dream sequence was a rare exception. She preformed the song as it was exactly recorded. And I wept, as did Courtney and Hana, as did Hana's father, who oddly was also in attendance. It was truly a beautiful experience for me. I hold it up as one of the most cathartic dream experiences I've had so far. Everything just seemed so meaningful and harmonious. The dream was also punctuated by a murder mystery situation. Initially, I was confident that I knew who the murderer was. And this person was eerily beside me the entire time, and there was certainly some tension between us. However, he was not the murderer. I then thought the murderer may have been me. But then occurred an instance in which I peered through a wall that had been blown through completely, destroyed by some kind of explosive. On the other side, I saw a diminishing flame, it may have been a tiki torch. For some reason, I then knew that I was not the murderer either. His identity was never revealed. All in all, I'm looking forward to recording my dreams again. I don't know why, but it is important to me and my spiritual development. I experienced sleep paralysis upon waking about a week or so ago. It was horrible, being completely paralyzed while a sinister being loomed over me for I don't know how long, and i was unable to move or do anything about it, just cry in fear until i regained control of my body. I hope it never happens again, and I hope intentional dreaming, recording dreams, and perhaps even lucid dreaming, will prevent it.
I am in Dream-Prague with Saimi, showing her some parts of the city I like. She and I have both just recently arrived there, although it seems as if we’re here for entirely different reasons, and the visits just happened to coincide. We seem to be in the northwest region of the city. The place I’m showing her now is one that not many people know about, a neighborhood of winding streets on a hill, neat rows of houses on either side of the streets – a quiet, peaceful place. The houses are covered with what look like enormous cobwebs, large enough to completely cover most of the roofs. I tell Saimi that in the early morning, when it’s misty, they shine like silver. We then head down to the tram stop together. This, unlike the webbed streets, is a location that’s familiar to me from a previous iteration of Dream-Prague, although it doesn’t correspond to any waking-life location. On that occasion, the whole area had a much rougher vibe and was also undergoing construction. Perhaps with this in mind, I pull out my cell phone to show Saimi a couple pictures of how it used to look. I input the password first, which isn’t my waking-life password. This one is also six digits long, and the numbers signify a personally important date – there’s a charged quality to the memories the date pulls along with it. The date is December 22, I think (although I can’t remember the year now, or precisely what the date’s significance was). When I find the pictures, I notice strings of triangular orange flags in some of them, which tells me that I must have taken them during the protests. The wait at the tram stop is rather long (justified in-dream, I think, by it being a weekend). There’s a whole little scene here with a man who’s decided to teach his dog another song (it already knows two). It’s a large dog, but friendly: it puts its paws on me, almost knocking me over. The song he’s chosen is one of those old, popular ones most people know: it has kind of a jazz standard feel to it, lots of seventh chords and a melancholy tone. The lyrics are in German. I don’t remember what all of them are, though, and nobody there seems to know them all offhand, so I get my phone back out to look them up. While I do, a man in a red shirt sings a version of them in English – although I have the impression he only remembers about half of them and is making the rest up as he goes, and he also starts at the chorus for some reason. Once the tram arrives, I get my ticket punched – I just have a one-use one since I haven’t been here long. The tram heads straight east, neither turning or changing height so that, as the ground level falls, we’re positioned high enough to see most of the city from above. I look out over it. I’m glad to be back here, and I’m already looking forward to walking around all these places again. Eventually, the landscape changes. We now seem to be going through a park, which is also familiar to me. I’m puzzled at first – I don’t remember the tram going here. But I do remember seeing the tracks back when I worked in this place, and so it does make sense that it would go here. The plot seems to have changed now, with the dream partly drawing on memories of the old wildlife hospital, a different time and place. I still used to work here, although in the dream, it seems to be mostly a long-time crew instead of short-term volunteers. It seems as if this iteration also suffers from financial issues and is staffed at about half the level it should be to run it properly. This is currently relevant since the people on the tram are now coming to work here as well, which brings it about to where it should be – in fact, it seems as if I’m taking them here for that purpose. As we walk through the park, I lead the way. I find everybody together out back behind a building, where they're seated in rows on the ground. As I walk between the rows, I happen to glance down at my own legs and notice I’m wearing brown leather sandals and khaki pants that are cut off at the knee. Not far off is the man who’s in charge of this place, who’s grateful to have so many people coming. There’s a sense that there was once some kind of past tension between us that was wrapped up in why I left, and he’d since come to recognize was his fault. But that all seems to be over now. There’s conversation now, and something about a ceremony that’s going to take place soon, where Rae, NC and KD’s daughter, will break a staff in two and then remake it. 3.7.21
I am in some unfamiliar town with Jackie Greene. I think the town may be in Arizona or Colorado (I had been looking at a digital map of the US and zooming in around that area, surprised by how much of it was forested). It sort of feels like a mountain town, small, isolated, buildings with large wood exteriors, yet not high in elevation. We’re walking through the town and it is very pleasant out. We’re talking about his music and/or me seeing him. I tell him the first time I saw him was at Strawberry and then add ‘2007’ or ‘2017’ to be more specific. I hope I’m not being too annoying about anything, but don’t think I am.
I am at Melissa’s house and logged onto Dante’s Zoom class fairly late. Alex, and I think Cody, are here and at times they can be seen in my background (I have moved around a few different times). I hear Alex ask Cody if he likes the Tedeschi Trucks band. He pronounces it ‘ta-deshy’, whether seriously or not I’m not sure. I know I started out in front of a blue curtain, but now I’m in a little hallway between the garage and house. I’m wearing a hat and/or hoodie and Melissa says something about them not recognizing me. Melissa steps over me once and once again on her way back - it is almost sexual. I’m not sure I’m worried about anyone seeing. Now I think we’re on a break and I’m in what looks like Dad’s backyard. We’re back now and playing a Jeopardy type game. I don’t think I’ve even had my volume up for most of this class. I think the class is scheduled to go later but he cuts it a little early. I am eating some chicken nuggets or strips. The sky looks like a nice later afternoon with a few stray clouds.
I'm on some sort of racing track that reminds me of Mario. I have cars on my feet and use them as roller skates. There is a big jump with a bridge that I successfully come over. On the other side there is a forest. I push my feet as if I was ice skating but it does not feel entirely right. Some other people are also racing with me. Some of my family is there. I'm in my room and think about flying out the window. I'm about to open the window but I'm not sure if it is a dream. I count my fingers and notice that my middle finger is really short. I fly out the window and ask my self what dream goals I had. I can't recall and the dream starts to fade away. Notes: I wanted to get a massage that night. I'm with my brother and we have hijacked a medical car for the hospital. It is not an ambulance but the same size. I'm sitting on the right seat in front of the car. My brother is in the back of the car. The car is driving but I don't notice if there is anyone by the steering wheel. I pull down some kind of touch-screen from over my head. A 4-digit passcode is shown. I remember that the code was 1234 and try it out. I successfully come in and look around. There is some kind of online shop with different kinds of cool sounds for music production. I look at the prizes and notice that they use the Fortnite currency. One music package costs about 4000.
27th March 2021 Scraps: (recalled after I sat at my desk) I am at my computer. I'm checking on Steam or some other similar program and in there I see that AH messages me saying that I "was right, it was a joke", which she then starts to explain in more detail. I feel a mix of anger and mistrust but also relief. A possible false awakening where my alarm was going off and playing music; but something about the music didn't seem right each time. The environment looked accurate to waking life but foolishly I didn't think to do any types of checks, as I felt quite sleepy. Notes: - While in bed last night, had another dialogue with Data as I was falling asleep. This time I could use my own voice and not the captain's. But Data seemed unable to communicate very clearly this time. We talked about dream signs and my inability to either notice them or have them appear, lately, as well as how I have been doing some RCs too routinely sometimes. - When I recalled the fragment about the conversation with AH, some of the dream feelings described were temporarily present. I proceeded to check that this conversation hadn't actually happened and really was just from a dream. - Although the environment looked accurate while I was hearing the alarm, I also recall it seemed brighter than it should have done for that time of the morning. I've had dreams where the environment looked so accurate that it was easily acceptable for them to be waking life locations/situations.
I’m going through an In’N’Out drive through with Mom in the passenger’s seat and I think Makayla in the back. This one doesn’t look like any I’ve been to - it seems too small and dingy. The menu is also incredibly tiny and therefore hard to see, so it’s good that I know what we’ll want without having to look at it. I order Mom a #1 with a chocolate shake and myself a #4. *I’m still in the middle of ordering when I’m cut off and awakened by my alarm going off. I’m either at a Grateful Dead show or watching a video of one. I’m mainly, or only, seeing a fairly young (mid 1970s?) Jerry and Phil. At one point I am so close that I can see their teeth in great detail, Phil’s being thick and wide and Jerry’s being tall and skinny. They are each singing and playing with vigor. The song seems fairly long and jammed out. Now, I am seeing a setlist, I think online. It has track times, so I see that indeed some songs got pretty long - around 16 minutes. At least one title I didn’t recognize, which is very uncommon, if it ever happens, for me. *Listening to Furthur last night, I was thinking about Phil’s singing.
I thought about doing a clay figure when I went to bed but did not become lucid. I'm playing the guitar and working on the project with Hanna. I am very happy because she has added a section where I can solo. I test it out and love the sound of it. Notes: I have wished that this would be the case but I am happy to be able to back her song up. I didn't look on my fingers when I played and did not think about what scale it was but the music was spot on!
12/6/20 I am at a sort of camping house which is located in a campground I frequent. It is a common area that seems like slightly nicer than a large shed. It is run down but charming like a rustic 3rd world b&b. There are daily cleaners who tidy up the place and the shower always smells nice. At a certain point I am doing laundry in a common space just casually listening to the sounds of the machines and the outdoors. There are a few people who hang out in the common room/kitchen, it is familiar to me because I have spent a fair amount of time in this room. Other people have the same sense of ownership. They have special events which can be facilitated like communal meal time or paid tours of the grounds we are on. There may be lasertag? I gather it costs like ten bucks a night for a fold out bed in one of the rooms. It's not fancy but it's dry and warm. I live there for a while with friends from the campground. I meet amazing people and we form a sort of impromptu family unit. Alex's wedding Alex the French guy cooking and I become friends at the campground ground, we become best friends during the summer and while there he meets the love of his life. She is called Eve and just as wild as he is. They hit it off really well while at the campground and are always around each other. At a certain point he asks her to marry him. Very happy for them both I tell him I am ordained and would love to officiate the ceremony for them. Fast forward to the day of it is something slightly different. His grand idea is to entertain her and her friend in the middle of a street while musicians set up behind them in a mass of chairs and perform their favorite sonata flash mob style. She is meant not to see the group before they are set up so him and I are attempting to distract them while the musicians show up. I am the main distraction. I am playing an accordion for the first time, I really enjoy how it sounds and remember some of the notes I play while dancing with the accordion like a drunk street performer, I get some compliments on passing. Cars keep coming down the path and Alex is getting distraught because Eve and her friend see people coming in and setting up behind them though I think they try to pretend not to, to preserve the illusion of surprise. The road was supposed to be closed off but traffic keeps cutting through the parking lot driving past where we are, we move to only blocking one lane. Her and her friend finally notice something special going on so he abandons the surprise and decides to move to an open part of the parking lot with no road going through it. The location then turns into a large room like one of those strip mall churches with drop ceilings and tile floors. She knows what's happening now, but it's ok the magic is in the air, everyone is getting excited now. She is getting ready with her bride's maids and they all have a different bright neon colour on. She is all blue in a tight fitting dress with a Massive blue fohawk, her friends have on, red and green with their hair dyed respectively, with also matching awesome huge hairstyles. Alex has on a snazzy suit. It almost looks like a mix of period and futuristic style. There are lines of chairs people are filing in taking their seats little by little. Alex was sitting next to me waiting for the orchestra to all get there and set up along with guests. At a certain point he goes to the doorway to see his fiancé. I think of the tradition and what people will think of him seeing her before the ceremony but he doesn't seem to mind. He stands with his back to the doorway and she comes up and gives him a kiss on the cheek, I am standing close to him, they are both giddy. He glances to the side but doesn't see all of her. Things then begin to be quite chaotic. Not all of the orchestra is here yet, there is uncertainty if they will all show up. A long tuba flute player is in front of me blowing into his flute thing, obviously bored. The ones that are there are just casually tuning their instruments making that pre-show cacophony. The bride starts to freak out a little bit, getting nervous and pacing back and forth at the front of the room. Alex goes up to try to comfort her to no avail. I now have an open seat next to me. There is an older couple which walks in looking for a seat and asks me if the one next to me is open. I tell them that's the groom's seat but see many open seats behind me I motion towards. There is a rough not unattractive girl who walks in, and I point to a seat behind me as well. A guy she was flirting with earlier in the dream(at the campground maybe?) is sitting next to the open seat. She mentions 'well at least someone can carry me out of here if I get too drunk' and the guy quietly pumps a 'Yes' fist action. I also gather she has some kind of show she is popular for. Things are becoming more chaotic now as the couple begins to audibly fight at the front of the room. There is a great disagreement which neither party is seeing eye to eye. The band is all here but are waiting to start playing. As with the crowd, we are all just kind of looking at each other while we watch the obviously distraught couple attempting to make amends just prior to their wedding. I really feel bad for the couple, Alex is being proud and trying to make light of everything to calm her down. She is upset he is not understanding her, claiming his insincerity is not helping and she's kind of laugh crying at his attitude. She tries to get away as he's following her back and forth in front of the room. It is really hard to watch. People in the audience start to bicker at each other, making snide comments and generally escalating the situation. Things are really going downhill now. Everyone is standing up and multiple people in the audience are in arguments. Someone makes a comment to the girl with the show obviously trying to throw shade however she seems oblivious to the criticism. I finally interject and say something for the first time. 'I mean, we all have seen your show, so we know who you are, but have YOU seen your show?' People gasp and everything stops while people standing in a circle are all looking at her and I now. I continue 'Now don't get me wrong, I like you, and I'm sure many people here do too. But you should really watch your show. Because if you do that then you would actually See Yourself. Like see yourself how we see you, not just how you see you, and that's not a bad thing. It's just the perspective of seeing yourself the way other people do. That's why relationships are so important, it's a way for us to see each other through each other's eyes, and that's beautiful. That's what is so special about Alex and Eve, they see each other, because they love each other, and it's that completely unadulterated vision which bonds people in this way.' Everyone is silent but smiling, The couple is quietly hugging behind the circle of people, they are watching and listening with tears in their eyes while smiling and pressing themselves into each other. 'Its important to see who you really are, or at least to find someone who can really see you, so that you can see yourself, and love yourself, so that you can love each other' The dream fades with a warmth of compassion in the room though it is quiet after my voice.
I am on what seems to be a speed boat. The boat also seems very long and flat. We seem to be going rather fast over the open water (the ocean?) We are not too far away from the shore though. There is something about us being on the way to see Dead and Company and/or John Mayer driving the boat. I think about how I’ve seen Dead and Co in the middle of the desert and will now see them out in the middle of water, impressed by this. (I’m envisioning a scene of them set up out in the sand - by Las Vegas? - with no stage or crowd). I’ve been standing on this boat, and there’s a guy standing next to me. I wait until we’ve arrived to strike up conversation. I ask if he’s ever surfed? In an English accent he says ‘just now’ or something similar. Now, I am swimming.
I meet Davie504 on the upper level in Det Röda Huset. I talk to him and wonder why he is here. He says that he was traveling to Germany (?) but got my letter and decided to go here on the way. We talk and decide to jam some music. I now sit in the TV room upstairs in our home and Davie sit in my room. He plays the guitar (lol) and I play the base. He plays some kind of chord progression and I play the A-minor pentatonic scale. Notes: I haven't seen Davie in a long time. This is the first time my music playing felt realistic in a dream.