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Non-lucid – Notes – lucid – Interpretation – wake/dream visuals/visions

2018-03-12 There have been many dreams of late, a certain theme have played over in its variety of incarnations. Approaching the water, confronting/releasing the reptiles. This dream showed up about a week following our last gathering. It felt big, as intense symbolically as when I have been guided previously by African Dream root. I didn’t intend to dive into it, but it seems appropriate at this time.

Dream 1: (2018-11-23) A series of events transpire in a complicated building complex with a large body of water, containing dinosaurs in them, which revolve around teaching others to express their needs and confronting children in an armoured “Big Daddy” suit.

I am in a large building complex, it is very bright and modern looking. There is plenty of sunlight pouring through the windows and there is a lot of greenery spread out around in the building. It is as if the building is roughly centred around a large pool in the middle, which is in place both at the ground floor and the basement. At the ground floor this massive square pool is surrounded by spectator seats, as there are multiple shows of “scary” animals taking place. In particular at present there are two megalodons in the waters as well as a larger dinosaur that during the dream ends up killing and consuming the two sharks.

In the beginning of the dream there is a show happening in the central room where the sharks and dino monsters are held. To begin with there is a jovial touristy atmosphere surrounding the show and all the spectator seats are filled. It very much has a Jurassic World kinda feel, which is significant in its theming.

I find myself at the basement looking into the waters through a thick sheating of glass. This is where I observe the massive dinosaur consume the two sharks in the tank. It also slams into the glass, though I am unsure if it displays signs of cracking at this or not. In any case this is where I get the feeling that is common to my dreams “I know how this story plays out”. I know that the massive dinosaur is going to crack the tank, thereby releasing 4 dinosaurs where one is a massive snake, the other is a t-rex, the third is the water-dino itself, while the 4th is unknown (immediately here the theme of the 4th unknown deserves attention as it has been a running theme since the night before our first dream sharing gathering, where I encountered an inner child that I didn’t know all that well amongst 3 others that I knew very well).

As per usual as I am thinking this an alarm goes off and there is a somewhat panicky atmosphere as the building starts being evacuated.

I head out off to a side building. It is on the right hand side of the body of water. This time I am on the upper floor. I am sat on a pathway made of steel and below there is a botanic room, again beautiful and floral. I am preparing a workshop. This workshop is about me making myself available to my clients for whatever they dare express their desires around. This particularly is meant for me to teach others about expressing their desires in a public forum, but with me as an object (something that was a major theme at a spiritual workshop in 2017, which I spoke to MA about). F is there and she says that she is interested in a massage, but nothing sexual.

Then I am in Hornslet, where I grew up. M is there with E on the road from the park, leading up to the council building. For some reason this is still connected to the building complex with the sharks and dinos. I am also there talking to M about what happened between them at the spot, so both while it is happening and after. M tells me how they decided to have sex, despite some of the warnings we had discussed about romantic ideations following transpersonal journeys.

M tells me: “We had a lot of sex and to begin with it was just vaginal penetration. But then I decided to fuck her in the ass, despite the fact that she had told me that she didn’t want to. It was rough on her, but I decided to do it anyway so she would have the experience from a friend. She needed to learn”. Throughout this interaction there is an implicit meaning between us around E’s tendency of leaning too hard on support from the outside, in particular male support, which can lead to her being exploited, which is what M was trying to teach her tough-love style.

There is a brief flash of running into my Cousin on a similar steel pathway on the uppermost floor.

The last full scenario again takes place on the right hand side of the large body of water, somehow in the same place as the last scenario with “expressing desire”, yet also below and somewhat unrelated. Again very bright and a light and pleasant atmosphere.

I am in a “Big Dady” suit from Bio Shock. I have almost won, yet I am caught off-guard by a grenade that slips under a big white statue or cardboard cut-out of a statue. The grenade is thrown by a little girl and the reason it catches me off guard is that I have stepped in a puddle of water and the grenade explodes in a long arc of lightning, nearly killing me. I try to escape by rushing to the stairways, but am electrocuted.

I sit down and feign death until the little girl and her mother appears. They walk down towards me the mother approaching. She leans really close checking my pulse, talking to me, asking me if I am dead or not. She has almost decided that I am death until one of my eye-lashes brush against her cheek and she proclaims “I felt a streak of lash against my cheek” and she discovers my deception. But she is so close and in such a vulnerable position that I manage to throw her off and have her eliminated upstairs.

The small girl that was accompanying her mother knows that upon the death of her mother that she can’t hope to win our contest. I am simply armoured too heavily in my “Big Dady” suit. I walk upstairs and am now confronted by 3 children, 2 boys and the girl. They all know they have lost, but decide to choose their weapons – pillows.

As we engage in a pillow fight and the kids seem drained of hope, I get a bad feeling. I feel bad for them and as such I decide not to fight to kill them.

Dream Ends.

Non-lucid – Notes – lucid – Interpretation – wake/dream visuals/visions

Pennywise from 'It' and I made a pact. He granted me a power, telekinesis. I approached a guy who had always been bullying me. He was perhaps 10, and I think so was I. I wanted to just lift him with TK and pull him towards me. To scare him, maybe hurt him. But when he was suspended in the air in front of me, he looked dead. Like, I'd accidentally snapped his neck by pulling him so violently or something. That's when Pennywise began haunting me. I could feel the terror building inside of me as he got creepier and creepier, but then my real-life alarm clock went off and saved me. Phew.

Non-dream stuff; I was only aware of waking up at about 9, but I know I was awake before that. The dream I had in my memory as I woke up, I quickly forgot, by feeling the need to sit up and crack my neck and back, yet I somehow still remembered some earlier, non-lucid, dream fragments:

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Dream fragments:
I remember being in a room, like at my parent's house, or my childhood home, but I can't say I remember the room in detail; it was one of the rooms at the back of the house and it was dark (but I didn't have the impression it was night). I was aware of a cat, black and white I think and there was a catfish or something... I distinctly remember the cat playing with the catfish and the catfish meowing; at first I was concerned for the fish somehow, and I remember turning my attention to something else and when I looked back again the catfish was gone, the implication being that the cat ate it. Suddenly it felt like the cat was aggressive and I remember trying to claw me; I think my instinctive responce was to smack it.

In another fragment, I simply remember my two siblings being present. Possibly in a corridor leading to some stairs or with stairs intersecting it.

Another fragment, I remember being aware of being back in my native country, with some sort of dream-generated friends or acquaintances in the dream and going up some dream-generated stairs, practically crawling up them, because in this dream my fear of heights seemed much greater. The stairs now remind me of something that Gaudi might have made, twisty, curly, yellow. I remember saying "I hate this country's stairs", in reference to the fact that my own native country has plenty of hilly cities and towns, with plenty of stairs.

I kept climbing the stairs and eventually reached a tier where there were floating platforms. Some sort of children were here, as if they played here everyday and one said to me "if you want to get to the other side, I'm afraid jumping is the only way". I looked around for another option, hanging close to the floor due to my fear, and indeed there was no choice.

The fall was a big one, I knew this. Someone from behind me, one of the dream friends said something like "we're 50 stories high, don't look down!" and I think I told them to shut up, that I knew, and I strongly resisted the urge to look down and simply hopped to the first small stone platform that was floating above this gap. The floating stone platforms were different shapes, some hexagons, some circles. I hopped to the next one, closest to a doorway on the opposite side of where I first arrived at this tier. I don't remember going through.



In another fragment, perhaps related to the last, I remember something in space, with asteroids and a space base, but not much else, unfortunately. This was one of the dreams I forgot by sitting up.

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Notes:

• Last night, when I went outside to our yard I saw one of our neighbour's cats sitting on the wall, and it is black and white and has a bell; it scurries off when it sees us, even though the cat is the one choosing to come into our yard.
• In the platform jumping area, the abyss or gap or whatever was actually quite small, as I realised by hopping to each platform; the platforms felt decidedly steady despite their floating nature. The initial apprehensive nature of my fear likely made the gaps seem much wider at first, especially considering a fall implied death, and therefore, great pain in the last seconds.
• It is of note that I hate many platforming games, as usually the combat mechanics annoy me to great deal, such as Super Mario.
• Although my fear of heights varies greatly in waking life, it usually comes before I'm at the location, because of the anticipation of the situation; whereas in the dream the onset was only sudden once I was on the stairs.
• I'm fairly certain these fragments were actually linked by some transition, but I cannot remember it.
• As the stairs went up, there were buildings to either side, but on the right there was a gap between the stairs and the buildings, whereas on the left side they were adjoined. There were no doors at all at any point. In my native country the stairs would be less steep (possibly made steeper by fear) and there would be tiers and doors every so often.
• The fact that I and my siblings were present all in one room, these days, is not statistically likely. This should have made me question reality.
• The fact the catfish meowed should have made me RC, because I realised that it was odd, that catfish don't meow.

Edit: added a very rough 3D scene I quickly made (10-15mins) of the stairs dream scene.

I’m in a study, sitting at a desk facing a wall. A man is sitting to my left. This seems to be some kind of music lesson: we have sheets of manuscript paper in front of us, and I’m doing some sort of exercise where I fill in bits of the melodies that aren’t written. I’m having trouble figuring out how to notate the rhythm I have in mind, but after moving to something else for a little while, I come back and manage it easily. I write the notes in with a red pen, very neatly.

The lesson’s almost over when a young girl, 7 or 8, runs into the room and lies down on the desk in front of us—the man’s daughter. She seems to be in a silly mood. She speaks to him in German - we've been speaking English until now - and he answers. She moves across the room, and they have an exchange in which he asks her questions, but she just gives nonsense answers and giggles (and totally ignores me). I just watch and pet the cat, a gray tabby that’s also entered the room, not at all put out by the interruption. Before long, a woman who seems to be a nanny comes in, presumably for the girl.

I wake up.

In the next dream, I’m staying in a large hotel with my parents. As I walk through the lobby, towards the staircase, I see a number of men dressed in suits of armor decorated with intricate patterns and women in white ballerina’s outfits with similar patterns in silver. Some sort of wedding party, I figure.

After a quick trip to the room, which is at the end of a hallway, my mother and I seem to be walking out, away from the city center and towards the outskirts. This is Wilhelmshöhe, apparently—although it would be hard to find a place that looks less like the actual place of that name. There’s less and less to see as we walk along. Less traffic, too. A man drives a horse-drawn carriage past and gives us a peculiar look. Somehow, I have the feeling that we’re expected here, and he’s a part of it.

And, an unknown period of time after that, I’ve been transported to a different place, a large building full of people getting ready to something to begin. I’m a part of it, too, now. A man is explaining to me what’s going on in a mixture of French and German. That seems to be the norm here, and I slip into it too as I speak with him.

I comment at one point that something he just said sounded more like how people talk in movies than in real life—or dreams, I add. Because I do know it’s a dream by now, although I’m not sure just when the realization hit me. But I’m going along with it because it looks like some interesting and possibly important things are going on here.

Unusually for a lucid dream, it was difficult to remember much of what happened—some details stood out, but a lot of it just blurred together. The man I’ve been talking to seems to be in charge and has us carry out different tasks, and give answers to questions. I seem to be apart from the others somehow, involved, but playing a different role.

(17.6.18)

Hi guys,

This dream spans through the course of seven years within the dream. Quite a bit of the daily activities had become fragmented as a result. I'll also be condensing the events so that it's more concise. The dream fluctuates between lucidity and non-lucidity. However, during lucid moments I choose to let the dream unfold on it's own.

The dream starts off non-lucid. I'm with my significant other who has passed away, I'll address as Kana. We are surrounded by whiteness. There is a false memory that we been meaning to conceive a "soul child" astrally. Kana and I are both female. Kana says it's time. The white emptiness beneath us ripples and our energies meld as we astraily conceive our soul child. I feel drained and I awake.

I look around in my bedroom without moving not realizing I'm clutching something close to me under my blanket. "A dream?" I sit up and notice an otherworldly infant in my arms. "Yes, this is my child." She opens her eyes and we gaze at each other. "Oh yes, you are Cocoa." Cocoa smiles. This is the only time she smiles in a long while.



Following months...
Over the weeks I have moments when shroud of that reality fades and I'm lucid. Adapting to a life caring for a child was hard, but I manage to get by with the help of my mom. I hold on to my secret of my lucidity to myself. I begin to see something strange with Cocoa. She seems to be completely unable to feel guilt, pity, remorse, or sympathy. She seem to have no regard for safety of those around her and she seems to crave human blood, often biting into her own thumbs to suck blood if no one else is nearby.

Soul Child
As months turn into years and my getting accustomed to this reality my moments of lucidity doesn't have much effect. I was detached with the waking and I had grown to accept that my soul child is different from others. I even feed it my own blood to satisfy it's craving. It was not before long she starts exhibiting otherworldly powers. I communicate with kana in my head as I do in waking and ask her if we made a mistake bringing this child into this world. As Cocoa grew older, the more destructive she became. Watching over her, making sure no one is harmed, was taking a toll on me. In moments of lucidity I was tron between continuing my waking life and leaving this world behind. The waking world seemed so distant. Kana assures me that this was a time-dilated experience and for the moment guiding Cocoa was all we could do as there is good in her.

One of the chilling moments of her childhood was when she asked me to rip off my eyes and give it to her because she thought they were pretty. I had told her it's not right to ask someone of that nor to expect it and there were better ways to appreciate things.

Absolution
As a 7 year old Cocoa had become more calmer and mature. For a while it seemed like she was breaking free from her shroud of madness. I been weaning off feeding her my blood and on her birthday she says she no longer thirsts for blood and apologizes with tearful eyes for all the harm she has caused and all the pets she has killed over the course of her childhood. I was relieved. She was getting stronger and stronger, it was becoming difficult to care for her when she is so powerful.

I send her to school with caution and ask for Kana to watch over her. I see something that sends a chill down my back. As I was about to leave, Cocoa was smiling. The last I seen her smile was when she was a baby. I wonder what's wrong with me. Why was I not feeling relieved by my child's smile? Something didn't feel right. I go to the mall and look around just hoping to pass the time. Something didn't feel right, but I could quite place it. I order a sandwich at a cafe and look around. I look at a ceiling lamp above me and think "I can turn it on and off by snapping my fingers". I snap my fingers lightly. The light flickers on. I snap again, it flickers off. I look around nothing has changed. Everyone is minding their own business as if completely unaware of what I had done. My phone rings startling me. It's Cocoa's homeroom teacher's number. I answer it only to receive a weak voice saying "Cocoa" followed by a shrill blood curdling scream. I rush to Coco's school already knowing what I might see. I arrive at a scene with blood everywhere. Dead bodies everywhere. I had enough of this dream. It seems Kana and I failed guiding Cocoa. Amidst the bodies stands a blood soaked Cocoa. Upon seeing me she rushes at me and clings on to me with a tight hug. Saying she was sorry over and over, saying she only reacted to darkness in their hearts. I hug her back tightly. "I'm sorry, Cocoa, we couldn't save you..." and place my hand on back of her head. Her entirety pulses and I start absorbing her into my being.

I wake up crying. I do a reality check and check my phone. It has not passed seven years. I lay back on my bed looking at the ceiling and wondering what the dream meant.

Fell asleep at: 5:00 AM


Woke up at: 1:00 PM


Dream:
I think I'm in a warped, dreamlike version of my school, fused with one of the houses from the colonias near my town. It's all the usual dream stuff, just me walking around, minding my own business...


When the DC of my dead cousin shows up. And I am speechless.


Now, I'm not gonna sugarcoat things. Even though this was an experience personal to me, I felt like it was worthy enough to be talked about. It's nothing too graphic or too sad, so stick with me.

He's wearing a greasy looking pinstriped suit, a faded black with light gray lines. He looks unkempt, as was his style I guess. He was always the "cool" one, and often put his appearance first before anything (The man owned a leather jacket for Pete's sake).

Immediately I start choking up. He's on the other side of a chainlink fence but manages to jump over it because he could. I think he was talking about something, but I was too preoccupied dealing with my own anxieties.

"This is the one person I hate so much...How could he do this to us? Why does he still look so cool? How is this possible? The one person I try so hard not to emulate shows up in my dream, without MY permission? Typical. But...there are so many questions..."

He walks around for a bit; around a twisting, almost rotten tree, and peers into a window. Excited children flood the window, and he smiles back. I get even more temperamental.

He parkours his way up a wall, onto the roof, totally in line with his character. I think to myself:

"What do I talk to him about? How different are we? Why the hell did you do that to us? Will I ever see you again? Can you get the heck away from me?" My fist clenches trying to hold it in, and I choke up once more, on the verge of tears.


But I don't have any time to think.


The children whom he had met burst out through the door, and he jumps back down to meet them. I trail them all back inside through a red door to my right.

They're all laughing, having a good time, but I demanded an answer from him (Well, not really but you get the point) and still he had nothing left to say. The children have also done some excellent drawings and sketches on notebook paper, and I admire just how detailed it looks.

But I clearly have had enough. I stormed out of the room and went to contemplate this situation elsewhere.

I wind up in a big city. A parade seems to be going on in town as kids throw humongously large rubber dodgeballs at each other, cars pour in from every corner, and confetti rains down from above.

I don't take part in the festivities, I'm too shaken to even think. In the real world, that would've been the death of me. I walk callously across each gathering of students and even snake my way through busy traffic.

I come across a chainlink fence and think I should climb it, but thoughts of my deceased cousin crossed my mind, and I move onto something else.

And that's when the dream ended.

I was on a hill where I saw a woman standing facing away from me. She was wearing a blue dress, it looked as if the sjy itself had wrapped around her, with fluffy white clouds dancing across the fabric. The grass green and lush beneath her feet. Suddenly she turns and faces me. Her skin is pale and sickly, her lips are dripping with scarlet,glossy blood. "Where are my children," she asks me. I start to nod my head no. "Where are my children," she asks louder. I start to push myself down the hill backwards on my belly, the grass dry and itchy on my skin. She lurches forwards, "where are my children," she shrieks. I start screaming that I don't know as she grabs ahold of me. I then wake up.

I did really awful things in this dream. Not sure I should put it here. I might censor some of it. I was running around a series of dark corridors. To the right was a dressing room for boys, and to the left was the one for girls. Children, that is, aged 8-14, something like that. I was... killing them. With a knife. It was very dark, and I managed to kill only one boy in their dressing room. The corridors and rooms felt oddly abandoned and dark, which I found quite unsettling. I thought I was in a nightmare or horror game for a second, until I remembered I was the monster and had nothing to worry about. When I moved on to the girl's side, I found a room where one girl was sleeping. Next to her, her father was sleeping. Guarding her. I realized if I killed the girl, her father would no doubt attack me. So I decided to kill him first. While he was still asleep, I pushed my knife into his neck. He died gurgling, unable to resist. The girl woke up and saw her father die with the knife in his throat. She was quite young and didn't quite understand what was happening. I told her her father was just going to sleep, or something like that, to calm her down. The goal was to kill the girl next, but watching her wimper over her dead dad filled me with such regret, I just wanted to undo everything I'd done. I woke up right there and then, feeling confused I could commit such evil.

Before I fell asleep, I read most of Chapter 8 of "Faith is the Answer" by Norman Vincent Peale & Smiley Blanton and I prayed.

I dreamed of many little children singing happily in a church building on a mountain top surrounded by snow.

I laid on my back for most of the time I slept on this night and when I woke I felt very refreshed. I don't think this is only because of my sleeping position although that has something to do with it, I feel as though reading the "Faith is the Answer" book and praying also are reasons why I felt so refreshed.

Recall Begins:

I am a young girl, perhaps 13~15. I find a family that lives in hideaways and works in large steel barns, creating dubious devices. They are a form of Mafia, but take me in as one of their own. One day, I walked out to the barns to see the things they were creating there. This was a heinous act against the rules, as I was told many times to never look there. I walked straight into the final barn in the row of perhaps 6 barns and saw something that attested to the evil of the family. What it was I can not recall. When I saw it, I ran from those who were in the barn, but they've got backup from where I came from before I could push through that way. Instead, I turned my path toward the nearest person coming, jumped into the air as I traveled, and attempted to land a curled fist straight into their face. However, I have troubles aiming in dreams. Extreme problems. I may have become moderately lucid at this point, as I rewind the dream repeatedly until my fist connects, hard. More backup arrives and I take a similar approach with these men, utilizing attack moves that look more like break dancing than fighting, but it got the job done. I continue to run, and make it to the children's dwelling area.
I can see that some of my friends want to help me, but also fear greatly the punishment for disobedience. The dwelling itself is technically hidden within a secret chamber, but enough people knew about it that I knew at least someone would know where to find me. I am most certainly lucid by this point, as I vividly recall declaring within that this is a dream, and that if I expect to find another, new hidden passageway in the wall I was reaching for, that I would find one. Lo and behold,
the solid wall I was fast approaching gave way as a door, and I was able to slip into a new room.I am not sure what my state of lucidity is from this point on, but I know that the thoughts as they occur do not reflect either my waking state thoughts or that of the dream character I had become. Instead of remaining in secrecy, by some thought,
I decided to relinquish dream control, and the walls of the new room faded away. Some children found me, and reported me, bringing me before the council. The punishment for this crime, and I knew it before I had done the thing which I did,
was as thus: to receive a bite from a highly venomous snake which they nurtured in a fountain centered in the council circle. I felt a sense of deja vu at this point as if I had experienced this plot before somehow, perhaps having read it in a book at some point. Knowing what would happen next, I stepped, with some trepidation, into the fountain. I backed out a few times, but the third time I boldly stood as the snake latched onto my right index finger.The pain hurt greatly, but also not at all. I knew that it was a dream again, and knowing that my fate involved a painful and long duration of agony, filled with feverish fits, pain, loneliness, and thoughts that I would likely die, I choose to dissolve the mafia, their council, and evidence of their ever existing from the dream. Again, these thoughts do not reflect my own as I would reason but seemed to be of the dream character this time. With the Mafia's influence erased, the steel barns were re-written as the new setting for the rest of the dream to follow.I am no longer lucid after the jump,
and unsure of what character I am. There are two other individuals with me, one 20-year-old junkrat who's crazy blond afro gave her a reckless air when combined with her ratty tank top and torn jeans. She had a natural affinity for taking apart and building things with total junk, which may have included the Gatling gun slung on her hip like I had my handguns. The other appeared to be aged 28, darkly moody, and dangerous. Like me, he wielded dual handguns, which were concealed within his black coat. I presumed the coat's color was picked to match his hair color, but he corrected me in saying it was to match his pants. Aside from that, he was in charge of carrying around Junkrat's tools, such as a tremendously oversized bolt-cutter used on my highschool's pop machine. It was as we were taking parts out of said pop machine that we were rudely interrupted by about half the student body. For some reason, I think some of them had guns.
They surrounded our group, with the likely intent to either take us custody or kill us, neither which option seemed particularly appealing. I tried a desperado to fend them off, which failed and I had to reload. After the reload, I was on the other side of one of the groups surrounding ours, and from this spot, I noticed a little girl, perhaps 8 years old. She wore a distinctly colorful outfit, that gave off an anime character vibe. She then merged into the story as if she had been there the whole time, and was a part of our ragtag trio. She then proceeded to "help us out" by emitting a voice which had the effect of paralyzing all the other students. Somehow, the next thing I can recall is one by one shooting each student in the head,
possibly because the paralysis has a limited time effect, and this would be our only chance (but why not run?). After dispatching most of the students there, I walk up the ramp and head to Math class like nothing happened. Principal M is teaching the class, and I see my old buddy Del there. Principal M gets after him, probably for being a trouble maker,
before beginning the class. I take a test for a few minutes, before the entire east wall dissappears, and we are very high up. The class notices some power line workers standing in this weird contraption, where two guys have to hold up each side which they're standing in, while the other works in the middle. The are also very, very high off the ground, about 100 meters up and 100 meters away from us. Suddenly, one man loses his position and tumbles off. The contraption is no longer stable, and the other two fall off as well. The entire class watches in horror as these guys fall to their deaths far below. Somehow, it was much more shocking than shooting half the school. As we look at their corpses below, suddenly,
they stand up, perfectly fine. Principal M then explains that he had given each of them a wind rune, so that they wouldn't be hurt by falling.

Recall Ends.

My recall has been mehhh for a while, i've been sick, so my journal entries have got shorter and shorter...Now is the time to plum the depths of my memories to do these scraps justice, and let them loose on the world (well type em up).

D1 - Very vivid dream,I notice in a very small room, that for some reason I know is very high up...Is it an attic maybe? Yes behind me was a hatch door. There is a window with a thin white curtain with bright light streaming in. Anyway I notice a roughly painted hinge on the wall in front of me that is green and blue. It needs touching up with blue paint. So I get a paint brush but no sooner do I than the world literally turns upside down. I hang on for dear life as the room is tipped upside down. I have a feeling of my stomach lurching like on a fairground ride. The room stops moving and I notice a can of black paint has emptied onto the floor, fortunately also a load of clothes seems to have been dumped there too, on top of the paint.
Next the room starts to move again and the hatch behind me flies open, I hang on desparately again, feeling im going to fall any minute.

D2 - With my parents somewhere in the countryside I need to go pee, so I leave them in search.
I head down a path in the afternoon sun, it heads down between trees on a woodland path.
They're are people about everywhere so I can't find anywhere to pee. I search and search, eventually I try and head back the way I came and come across some kind of cave. I have a great deal of trouble getting out, it is very dark and cold. There is a European woman with blonde hair there. I have to climb up a stair case which seems to be made of dental plastic braces things, ugh. They are moving all over the place making my progress very unsteady.
Eventually I get out and am near a pavilion style hut and a boy steps out and shoves me in the right direction. I get to a type of marble underground station. I think it is called "talos" but am unsure.
I have a old fashioned gold wrist watch with buttons on it that I use as a phone to try and contact my family. I get through to them but feel I am lost and can't get back to them as I don't know whether I am imagining thing or am where I think I am. Desperately I use my powers to transmit myself hologram style to where they are but my powers fade and I am lost.

There was a man who was using some kind of ability to mind-control children into doing his bidding. I had a feeling he was going to get them hurt, by using them as weapons.
At this point I was close to fully waking-up, so this was more fantasy than dream: I walked away from there, and mind-controlled a lion. I wanted to make the lion attack the man.

Saturday January 21, 2017 0110

I was riding in the back of a long car like a station wagon with several rows of seats. There were a lot of male passengers in the car and we were all jammed in tight trying to get comfortable and get some rest. I remember being concerned about my wallet because we were jammed in so tightly. I looked out the front window. We were driving through some big city. I noticed two children riding on extra tall pogo sticks off to the right on the sidewalk. I thought, “If I’m dreaming then I should be able to affect those pogo sticks. Instantly, one of the pogo sticks bended like it was made of rubber and then snapped back to being straight again. This excited me! I thought, “I’m dreaming!” Then I thought, “If I’m really dreaming then I should be able to just fly out of this car.” I shot right through the windshield and flew up to about 30 feet above the car. I looked down at the car and the men were looking at me with amazed expressions. I willed the car to bounce up and down a couple feet off the ground just for fun. Then I flew around a little bit shouting, “I’m lucid! I’m lucid!” Then I thought. Maybe I should wake myself up immediately so that I have a better chance of remembering the dream. I landed on the ground on a wider section of sidewalk, sort of a walking mall area with benches. I thought, “I should try to do something fun. I thought that it would be fun to try to have sex. But there was no privacy in this busy city. I looked around and saw an attractive, tanned, red haired woman sitting on a bench and I approached her. There was a muscular man sitting next to her and he seemed like he was her boyfriend. He looked at me like, “Who are you and why are you approaching my girlfriend.” Since I knew this was a dream, I just looked at him and said, “You’re not going to do anything.” And I turned my attention back to the woman. She smiled and said something like, “No, he won’t.” She was wearing a leather top with no sides to it, just a hole for her head and a flap covering the front and back. I sat next to her and put my left arm around her under the front flap and sort of hugged her. But then I felt like I was sure to forget the lucid dream if I did not wake myself up immediately and I woke up in my bed.

D1 - headteacher is round my house and is using my account to buy things on ebay Oo I wonder where they will be delivered.

D2 - On holiday in spain I am running a creche for kids and there are loads. Alfie runs away and I am looking everywhere for him but while im out others escape LMAO. Sean comes to help me.

D3 - In a store I am wearing a green jumper and a purple one over the top, this fashion faux par means the assistant zooms in on me, thinking she can sell me loads of crappy stuff. Of course i am not interested and try to escape her clutches.

D4 - My daughter is in the house and I am trying to turn off the water. This is a phobia of mine that has returned in my dreams.

WBTB (success) due to my partner thinking it was a work day and getting up panicking

D5 - I am standing at the road side and immediately realise im dreaming. I make a car appear, it is an old ford original and black. It feels way to large inside without any seats, so I shrink it down.
It drives itself for a while then I get out and decide to jog. It feels great just to be free in the dream and I jog along a stretch of pedestrianised space on the sea front. Its quite busy with other joggers.
I see one woman jogging from the back, she has long dark hair, tied up and a red top with lycra jogging bottoms, little stripy socks and trainers. I like the look of her and decide to try something.
Previously I have used mind control but the people would just become mindless zombies and it was no fun at all. So this time I tried something different. I produced a note telling her that I was her boyfriend and put it into her hand. She read it and understood. We jogged along to her apartment. When she got out the keys she explained that she did not live alone but with her mother. When went up the stairs and when entering the spacious twenties style apartment. I saw her mother with grey hair and glasses and I was a bit apprehensive so I made her grow younger, to about the age of the other woman making them more like sisters. After that I got a bit distracted by sex and then thinking what I was going to do, as a result I woke up.

[comment]
I have realised the phobia I have is not specifically to do with fear of death but of fear of becoming overcome by my emotions. Hence the water.
When I was a child my parents ignored me when I had nightmares or was upset. I just used to get told off or ignored, so I learnt to hide my feelings.

I've had enough sleep today, but my recall is still vague. Go figure. I am in a village, and our community has to defend regularly against some kind of threat. I am seeing things in a side-scroller perspective, like Starbound. Someone is complaining that I find too many children on my expedition and leaving them at the village just put them at risk. I'm... not sure how that logic works.