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Pre bed: lecithin

Pre wbtb dreams: vivid but didn't write down when natural wakes so forgot

Wbtb: 1/3 latte

It was very hard to convince myself to do a wbtb as I was feeling so nice and sleepy. The lds were interrupted so my memory is a bit hazy for all details.

I miss the transition and a dream starts.

LD [summary]: In a dream version of my school and class starts. I become lucid and decide to do my location experiments [go from one place to another or as far as possible without the world changing]. After opening a door after door after door, I finally manage to leave the room and continue down a very distorted corridor, then struggle to maintain the building as is. The dream interrupts a few times/blindness. I get out of the building but unexpectedly teleport in front of our old place. Here I feel weirdly confident about being able to change the surroundings by simply turning around due to the high level of instability. Yet, it's against my initial goal, so I continue exploring the street with emphasis on proximity until the dream blacks out.

DEILD/or in dream chain:

I appear in the bathtub a bit uncertain about what's going on. Awareness increases and I move my hands around to stabilize, etc. What's interesting is that the bathtub is getting full of nice warm water that feels quite similar to rl. There is also music coming from somewhere, I assume it's my dream tablet. Still a bit confused about which dream goals I was supposed to be doing, I conclude that it is perfectly fine for me to just relax in the bathtub and listen to the music. The song sounds like depeche mode and in the dream I know the song and chorus lyrics. I chill out and listen to about half the length of the song, where the lyrics are a bit gibberish and I also don't know them, but once the chorus comes, I confidently sing with it. Also, at the end mentally manage to increase the volume of the invisible tablet for an ever better sound. [Post dr: have no memory which Depeche mode song this was or what those lyrics I knew were, it may be possible I came up with a different song altogether!]

There's a blackout/dream end and possibly I wait as in deild for the dream to continue.

The next moment, I'm back in the bathtub examining my hands and wondering what's going on. Minor confusion but then I mentally fill the bathtub with warm water again and pay attention to the sensation. I think about the dream length and conclude not to worry as I probably have caught a long rem rebound. Finally remember a task - easter egg and remind myself I can summon one. I close my hands and try to produce an easter egg - something egg-like comes into existence, with decorations and stuff, possibly plastic. It then undergoes changes and becomes completely transparent. This kind of defeats the purpose of the task since I'm supposed to open it and I try the summon again. Once more I get some strange transparent plastic foil egg with cool colored pics on the surface and another transparent plastic egg inside. I think this is like a balloon and wonder about it being ok for the task. As I examine the pics for the journal I notice that the inside egg has now colored pictures of balloons on the surface and the outside egg some disney characters like Mickey and Pluto. I think at this point the dream fades again and I end up mid way to wake.

DEILD/or in-dream chain:

Memory gap but I'm now in my old room and remember the next task - to come up with a new plant. I approach the window and see a plant whose foliage already looks weird, the leaves are similar to pelargonium but more curled. I decide to add random red fruit there, getting a mini-mental image but this doen't change the plant accordingly. There are two plants now, and without touching them and using mind, I start to twist their leaves and stems into all sorts of shapes, trying to create some sort of different plant. In the meantime flowers appear on one of the plants - two different types but they are almost drying now. More manipulation until in the end the plant turns into a smaller plant, mix of an orchid and violet. I think about the size then conclude this experiment in botanics is enough.

I then recall the tornado task and look out the window, thinking about one. The sky is gray and a tornado appears in the distance. It does look quite large and menacing and I briefly give in to paranoia, wondering whether I should hide since it is coming in my direction. Then I look at the opposite part of the sky and see that another one has formed. Two tornadoes, task complete and my mind is off the paranoia. Since this task is in line with my improve element manipulation goal, I wonder what else can I do here and decide that the thing to do would be to get rid of the clouds and tornadoes.

I go out on the balcony and focus on a tiny area of the sky that is blue and hold my hands up as if I'm stretching the blue sky gap, then decide to use the cover with hands tech to continue, covering the entire sky with my hands but for the gap of blue sky, so that the only thing I see and perceive is the blue sky (thus making me think of only blue sky). Allow a short while to pass, then move my hands away to see that the sky is indeed clearing up and is mostly nice blue sky. There are a few completely black clouds in one corner which I find interesting. Thinking about more element manipulation, I want to do something to the other clouds now - rearrange the sky again. I pick up a tiny white cloud and try to stretch it to the sides with my fingers (not really touching it) but end up actually holding a tiny piece of cloud in my hand.

I contemplate what else to do, might as well do the zoom task finally. Look to the other side of the balcony, where I see the neighbors' kid and his grandma and try to pick up a spot to zoom into. I look at a spot that will not be a too drastic scene change and point out to it, saying something like I want to be there. Nothing happens, but I see a second transparent but colored layer of my finger while pointing. The kid says something meaningful, giving me the impression of a smart DC so I think about interacting with him, also mentally remind myself not to lose my lucidity when doing so. The dream ends, back in bed and waiting for a bit but nothing more happens.

Date: 18 March

Pre bedish: Vit C, l-arginine

Not quite the same results with vividness compared to the last time (15th) that used l-arg, but the wbtb did it

Pre wbtb dream: somewhat vivid but quite evasive for recall

wbtb: 1/3 latte

LD1: The beginning memory is quite vague but the dream starts in my parents' place where I shortly talk to dad, some minor awareness about this being a dream that goes away the next moment. A relative comes and I go to greet her but notice that she is shaking, try to calm her down and hug her but she shakes more. I take a look at my hands and for the first? time I see an extra finger next to each one (they are kind of separated yet moving together with my hand). This doesn't quite jolt me into lucidity as I don't give it any thought at all, still concerned about my relative. As I move a bit I finally recall the short lucid moment before and remember I was supposed to be lding. I walk around with no particular place in mind when I feel the dream starting to thin out. In addition, there is this real but dream amplified sensation of hunger in my stomach, which makes the dream even more unstable and me very pissed off. I drag myself forward near some furniture with a rather defeated mindset.

Then I see dad sitting at a long dinning room table and recall the Mad Hatter Tea Party task. I think my mom was also there, so I turn to the kitchen and tell her to make me some tea. I look at the kitchen but my mom has disappeared. No, just when I need her DC she's gone, I turn around and try to summon her, which should be easy, still no DC. Quite interestingly, I do hear loud noises coming from the kitchen as if she is there - the water running, dishes, etc.

I decide to summon a cup of tea myself and more like a habit, I move my hands closer as if holding a cup of tea and the next moment I start distinguishing the light tea liquid in between. After a bit, a china cup appears there as well. My mood is super elevated after this - an effective summon in direct eyesight - not what I expected! I place it on the table - its existence is very shifty, where I try to manipulate it into a proper looking and full tea cup. In the meantime, if not mistaken mom comes and leaves a small tea cup at the table. I pour some of the liquid from the large one into the small one. Now everything looks satisfactory. The cups are still a bit shifty now with blue decorations. This is probably the only less rushed part of the dream, where I actually decide to take a moment and examine the picture at the bottom of the cup and memorize it. It is a typical Chinese decoration in blue - a village person with a Chinese straw hat as if fishing barehanded in the river in front of a village. I even get to feel some cool false memories/info about the people that used this cup at this point in the past and their life.

The next thing I need is a rabbit and I think about one while looking around, then turning to dad to see that he is holding one - a real rabbit, but as I come closer to examine it becomes a stuffed toy rabbit. Oh, well, it's still a rabbit. Now I need the mad hatter and as planned I want to summon Johnny Depp to represent him. This will be a tough one, so I decide to summon him as Jack Sparrow as this role has the strongest impression for my mind. I need to feel his presence, so I kind of shortly turn into him myself as I shout out full of emotion in a deep male pirate voice "Captain Jack Sparrow". A bit worried about the strength of my voice waking me up. This is enough to cause strong thoughts about the character and a JS DC appears in front of me. He's not wearing all the make up, but has pirate clothes and the dreadlocks. Similar to my cup summons, his facial features quickly change to those of a random DC. That doesn't matter now, I notice he wears no hat and if he is the mad hatter he has to, so I think about a hat, see one, then another one that I triumphantly place on his head. Ok, where were we? Briefly lose mental focus, then recall about the poem. I only manage to say the first word and the dream quickly thins out.

My concentration/mental energy has been rather poor for a deild. I review the dream, conclude that this was probably it for this month, since it will be difficult to go through all the summoning again. I feel tired and decide to just sleep.

A few short non-lds and then:

LD2: Weirdly, (or not!) I'm at my parents place again. Initially we are inside and my parents interact with this strange retriever type of dog. But something's totally off with it. It comes wearing some sort of a napkin mask and as I try to ask the dog about it, it seems to be trying to talk - like a person with his mouth shut, he (later she) makes some noises that sound like real words that almost make sense to me. I begin to suspect that this is actually a person undercover. He also runs like a person in the yard and it turns out just that - some French girl is pretending to be the dog.

We are outside now and some family friends are visiting. I make comments about the way they are dressed. Suddenly, it dawns on me that I am at the same location of the previous dream and indeed dreaming. I wonder what to do and discard the idea of going for the totm again since there won't be enough time to complete the task, yet since there's nothing else to do and maybe it's no coincidence I have another dream here, decide to go ahead anyways.

There's a part that's open to the yard like a garage with lots of tables and all the family & friends DCs walking around and being super loud. I try to summon a cup again, this time one appears on the table where I'm standing. Also, in the distant end of the garage is another table with two large tea pots. I bring the cup over there, but it fills up with sugar as I examine the items on the table. I guess that's enough for a tea party and decide not to mess with the stuff anymore. The light in the garage gradually goes down - this is also the end of the garage, near the wall. The DCs make their way around the table, taking part of the tea party. I need the rabbit and without actively summoning it, notice that on one of seats around the table is actually sitting the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland (1951), wearing the playing cards type of clothes. He is animated, which is strange, but I'm just happy about the summon and wonder what to do about the mad hatter. Again, unexpectedly as I look to my other side I see the mad hatter (1951). It takes me a bit to actually realize that I'm looking at the mad hatter from the movie. What is even more interesting is that I get this very convincing memory that the clothes that he is wearing in the dream are the correct ones - and he is a wearing green! (later checked to find out that it's the right attire). The dream becomes extremly dark at this point with one last effort I make all the DCs repeat with me the poem-like thing I prepared for this event :

"Lucid dreaming,
what's the meaning
something's flying in the sky,
awesome feeling
rabbits speaking
why, Ophelia, why?"

The dream is gone and I end up with a short session of SP (being unable to move, while feeling my physical body, seeing only darkness). I wait it out, thinking I must have been on my back (slightly to the right but yes) and start telling myself about the dream.

DEILD: I expect to wake up, but involuntarily deild back instead. My mental continuity is messed up and during this part I shortly believe that I haven't left the dream at all. I examine the mad hatter character residue who turns into normal DC. I go outside and wonder what to do as there still might be some dream time, briefly question if it was ok to do another task, where I think about going for toty. I decide to go ahead. Some background DCs and me are in the yard now. There's a small black hound-like dog running around that distracts me and I try to ignore it as much as possible, while thinking about the beanstalk. I see some sort of bean-like seeds on the ground and take them, looking for a good place to plant them. I open my palm and see them undergoing many changes - all sorts of colors and shapes and try to make them a particular sort of beans again. After some struggle they look like dark red beans and I place them on the steps where there is a lot of muddy soil and cover them with it. One stone's hanging above and I think it will mess up how they grow, because of my thoughts. Anyways, I start to think about them growing and they grow into small shoots. The dream fades.

Note to self: All of the actively summoned objects were shiftier than the rest of the dream (cup, rabbit, js, beans)

It's been quite a while, since I've updated here, so there we go.

Date: 13 Feb

Pre bed: 3 mel

Wbtb: 1/3 latte

I have a non-ld at my grandma's, then another one at an unidentified place that resembles our old place, where I'm trying to ld while family members are walking around.

Mini-LD: I have a short ld that feels like a dream from scratch where I suddenly find myself in this dream scene. I examine myself in the mirror. Memory gap.

LD:Now I am at our old place and remember to do breathing exercises. This goes on for a while until the dream collapses.

LD: I'm on the street now facing this mexican looking DC, he seems quite lively and says something that's in line with what I was thinking/saying. This leads me to initially believe that he's a smart DC. I start a conversation with him, asking him about stuff of interest.

As I talk to the DC, I start noticing that the background kind of flickers (the light in the entire scene), it gradually becomes thicker with this additional layer of light. In the meantime, it seems there is nothing to be learned from this DC as he keeps on coming up with random words.

I start paying less attention to him, continue expressing my thoughts and desires. I pay more attention to what's going on, don't analyze the situation, just witness and feel this energy. The dream layer of energy and light becomes brighter and more dense, it's like I can feel the entire field of dense energy that is over everything and there's a slight hue towards the very light blue to it. It's somewhat pleasant but I totally get the feel and worry that the dream might be coming to an end, while this is happening.

I then recall my restaurant task and look around. The street is rather deserted, just warehouses and no restaurant nearby. The energy effect gradually diminishes as I concentrate on my task. I get the feeling that it might be difficult to change things in this dream, it seems realistically stable when I look at the warehouses, but then get an idea to think about McD. I think about finding a McD around and sure enough, I see the familiar M (or something close to it) over one of the places at the warehouse.

It's closed though, I can see that it's empty and the lights are off. But no problem, I instinctively cover the place with my hand and think about it being open and working/full of people. I move my hand away and it is! I head in its direction, happy about the summon. There are large pictures of burgers all over. But wait, do I really want to eat McD in a dream? I continue inside the store, which feels like some part of mall now. There's this undetermined place that kind of looks like a supermarket section or a convenience store, whatever, it is adjusting to my thoughts/expectations as I come closer.

In the end as I reach the shelves, wondering what to pick up to eat, it becomes a sushi place. I examine the food, wondering what my subcon will come up with, trying not to influence it too much. There's delicious looking sushi with red caviar and also another box that I can't recall in detail. I grab those two and head towards the cashier. Here, I want to play around some more.

There are two female DCs working there and a number of DCs queueing to pay. I go to the counter and expect to be immediately served. They direct their attention towards me and take the boxes, giving me a slight look of discontent. I feel like I don't have any money with me, but instead of summoning them, I decide it will be more fun to pretend that I am paying and everything is fine. This is exactly what what I do - after the old Chinese lady tells me the price, I make a movement to hand her some invisible banknotes which she takes and gives me back a receipt and semi-existing sort of change (a coin or so). She also hurts me a bit with her finger nail and gives me a somewhat angry look (as if she knows what I'm doing). I take the stuff and get ready to leave but the dream fades and I find myself in bed. I briefly wait to resume, but it doesn't immediately happen, and possibly better for journaling.

Date: 11 Feb

Pre bed: lecithin

Wbtb: 1/3+ latte

Was feeling super sleepy and even after the latte and mantras, I knew if I fall asleep nothing's going to happen. So I try to seriously to project my intent forward and expect an ld.

DILD: I mostly have some unconscious moments and then the next thing I remember is that I am involved in this dream in our old place, some scenario going on, but at the back of my mind is this vague thought about lucidity. It's mixed with all the false thoughts about the current dream, but for some reason I decide that whatever's going on is not to my liking and that this is a dream. My dad's walking around as part of the pre-ld scenario and I follow him to the living room.

He sits on the sofa now and I remember about totm. I ask him for a dog biscuit. He instantly hands me something that looks like a rubber dog toy in the shape of a bone. I doubt it's edible and ask him again, where he hands me a smaller version of the same thing. As I examine it, it changes slightly in shape, but I'm still impressed it's the shape of a bone. I ask him a third time, hoping it will finally work. He gives me a small paper package with something like a biscuit sticking from one end. I take it out and it's a bone shaped dog biscuit. I take a bite and slowly chew to feel the taste, it actually tastes pretty nice and fresh, like a normal biscuit and has this very pleasant walnut flavor.

Then, I recall I wanted to ask about true love and ask dad. He doesn't give me a direct answer but addresses the question and makes some rhymes (word starting with o?). Mom is now sitting next to us and I ask her as well. She gives me a long philosophical answer that sounds appropriate, but can't really recall. Then I go back to dad and ask again and he gives me his previous answer.

I go to my room and decide to leave the place and see my friend a few streets away. I'm floating, moving towards the balcony door and open it using tk/thought, another one behind it, open it as well. I think about floating down like this but want to go in the other direction so descend in a hard to describe dream way down the balconies which by then become much longer than rl. I have the feeling that am moving much faster than the dream is building, so slow down and have a quick look at some items in front of me. Only one more story to jump and I wonder from which side it will be more convenient to go - back yard or the street will yield less distortions. The dream becomes shifty and by the time I reach the street, it changes to a different place. I try to bring the old street back by turning around and describing what should be here. The neighbors, this guy's place. I correctly recall he was in the previous dream. Yet, the street remains the same. The dream soon ends. I feel like continuing sleeping, but start to forget details already.

Date: 06 Feb

Wbtb: 1/3 latte

I have a number of short lds that I chain through the void. Summary

LD: In my old room, stabilize by touching furniture. Notice that lamps are on. Find a newspaper I try to read with difficulty for a while. The lamps go off, I become blind and then the dream blacks to the void. I stay there for a bit, waiting for the next dream.

LD: In a car, get out of the car, notice my reflection in the windows. Hair is the same, but it gets in my face, I make a ponytail. I want to change the scene, try splitting the space, I feel another place, but nothing visually changes. I get bored, allow myself to fall back. This yields a number of sensations as well as weightlessness. The dream fades to the void. I wait for the next scene.

LD: I find myself in a nice hotel lobby, bright flowers decorate the place. Some guest DCs, a monk at the distance catches my attention, I go to check it out. The monk is gone but a few DCs are paying their respect to a metal statue. I have some mischievous thoughts, but bow down instead. There are two more statues (not in service), metal turtles. The dream fades to black, I stay still for DEILD but it takes a while.

Review in head, feeling tired, I fall asleep.

DILD+: on and off lucidity, FA, in- dream wild and sexy time

DILD: I find myself in this familiar place and start looking at the plants near the windows, try some tk on them, but it doesn't work. I think maybe there's a reason for this. Then I turn to examine the room, everything looks kind of blurry and unstable. My attention is caught by those lamps - three lamps, I try to identify if they come from a memory or just random ones, it's like my vision almost splits in two and there is a fourth lamp, but I try to focus more and they're back to three. I mentally make a note of the bad quality, then go down the stairs. I immediately regret doing so, because I run into the B6 DC and she charges at me. At this moment, I become quite concerned that this might truly be some sort of evil entity just using her form to terrorize me. It's just too active, so lively in the eyes and so aggressive. I have no choice but to face her. I think I say a few words, but her mood remains the same. Then I decide this is a good opportunity to do my breathing and concentrate on that. I do this for a while. In the meantime, she seems to have changed her mind about attacking me and is weeping.

Memory gap, possibly another blackout.

DILD: On the street now and I see this empty space in the horizon and recall I wanted to use something like this to draw a mountain. A bit uncerain if the dream will last long enough, with all the blackouts and instability before. I decide to go ahead with the summoning, yet before I do any motions with my hands I notice that the space isn't quite empty. It looks like in the very distance, as if seeing through the fog is something that looks like a large mountain. As I keep staring at it, it becomes much clearer and closer, till I find myself looking at a solid spot of the mountain covered with grass. The surroundings have changed without me noticing and I am at the foot of this huge mountain. I cover the majority of it with snow until I feel it's enough for the task. Then I examine the slope, which is initially way too steep to enable any upward movements. This worries me but I move to a part of it and feeling very excited summon a pair of ski and ski poles.

I totally can't believe the summon worked as I have nothing to do with this sport. Anyways, I start gliding up the slope, which by then is less steeper. Contrary to my expectations from real life, this is not as hard and actually pretty pleasurable. I glide upwards the slope which goes up and down and it feels as if I am on a roller coaster. Then I reach the top of the mountain and feel adventurous, contemplate on jumping from the top or skiing down. Yet before I can decide what to do, the momentum carries me forward and I continue moving in the air. I notice that I feel no switch in sensations from gliding on the mountain surface to this weird air movement. My mood is great, I gaze to what's ahead and not below me. It is a beautiful view of green plains, with a weird building with one-two statues in the distance and a very large gray palace next to it.

At this time it clicks this could so well be the palace I wanted to summon (while reviewing tasks during wbtb). I'm still skeptic that will be able to make it and complete the entire task but give it a go. Don't remember flying for a long distance, it's like the palace became closer as I started to focus on the steps of the task. I go in what looks like museum palace lobby, there's some thematic furniture, long red carpet or velvet curtains, don't pay too much attention to them. I immediately think dad. That's actually quite easy and there he stands in one of the side corridors. I say a few words to him, to mentally confirm this is going the way it has to be. Then start looking for the beast but there is no one in sight.

The room I'm in is pretty small and there are stairs going down and I go to the lower floor, looking for the beast. I run into an old Chinese man that I try to make look scary but no matter how much effort I put into this, he stays the same. I obviously start making scary faces and roar in an attempt to distort his features into evil ones, but he looks scared as hell and is shivering. I can't believe my DC is afraid of me and where is that beast? A couple of DCs that I don't pay much attention to appear and there it is - a disgusting beast. It looks like one H. Bosch's animals - a mixture of different animals, like a large pink pig and echidna, strange fur and the nose of a mole. It also is spitting something poisonous from its month and hissing. I so much regret not being able to summon my much now friendly looking lion man at this point.

Disgusted, I approach the wild creature, tell him I love him (it) and kiss it near what looks like its mouth. I remain with my eyes closed and wait a bit, but can still feel this thing aggressively making breathing noises and moving around. I know the curse has to be broken but nothing happens, and I can't take the little bugger any more. It's somewhat smaller now - the size of a cat maybe and I throw it away where it gets under some furniture. That thing keeps making the sounds, but looks wounded and in the next moment I see that it gives existence to a DC that comes out from under the furniture. To my amusement, it is a female classmate. Good enough I suppose. The dream soon fades.

Date: 30 Jan

Pre bed: 400val, 45 mg B6

Wbtb: 1/3 latte

Overall impressions: vividness high, recall below average, pre wbtb recall close to zero

DILD: I am walking down the corridors of my school (DS) and we are supposed to have another class in a different classroom, so I don't know in which one we are right now (DS). I go to the where the teachers' room is and enter. It turns to a classroom from another part of the school and I examine the faces of the kids sitting there to determine if I'm in the right place. I see this small boy who has the features of my classmate as if he is 1st or 2nd grade and that jolts me into lucidity. The room is full of kids and I closely look at their faces trying to identify and expecting to see all of my classmates here (as in trying to recreate the past accurately). Most importantly, I am trying to recall and see exactly where is everyone sitting. There's a guy that looks like _ and _tells me that he sits alone, which I doubt, knowing he sits next to another guy. I start calling out names of particular classmates while trying to determine if the seating is correct.

For a second I think I see a doppelgänger of a classmate. I look at the first desk where at least according to a vague memory _ may be sitting or a dream memory, I have dreamt of that room so many times that my dream memories are also partially accessible and get mixed with real ones. There's another girl that doesn't belong here so I move her to the side leaving only _ here and contemplating. The teacher is about to begin the class, but with me acting so commandingly she seems to pause. I make an announcement that the class won't start until I identify and arrange all the classmates and continue looking around. As I stare at this classmate, I finally remember that I wanted to try to read a book and tell her to give me something to read. She hands me/I notice a paper notebook on the desk. I'm slightly uncertain if this will work, as I may run into some school materials. Anyways, I start browsing the notebook paper pile and get my hands on some sort of book. I try to read the title, which is a mix of words that don't make sense and I make an effort to understand what the book is about - something about hands, there is an illustration at the front cover and it looks like some sort of karate manual. I find this pretty cool and look forward to learning karate from this book.

If I'm not mistaken, I take another look at the front cover title and try to reason it out but it changes again as I try to assign some meaning to it. Then I begin browsing the pages and read one of them. The text stabilizes and I read the first sentence with great effort, but I get the meaning without actually reflecting too much on the words. It's a Mongolian story about one of their leaders. I browse more and every couple of pages there are beautiful manually drawn pictures, that look like little paintings that show what's happening in the story. He was supposed to participate in a horse racing in the village. I see a picture of the place after the race, empty now. I look at couple more pics but it's hard to memorize them all, then do back to the front page and title that I am still trying to figure out. Now on the cover is a very peculiar drawing of a house attached to a sleigh or whatever that thing is. The part of the title talking about hands now refers to bamboo and the act of practicing with care. I keep wondering about the title while the dream fades away.

Date: 24 Jan

Pre bed: 200mg val, 50mg B6

Wbtb: 1/4 latte

Wasn't very wakeful even though repeated mantras a few times, fell asleep rather fast, had a few non-lds I can't recall

DILD: I am having a tense conversation with this female DC I know. She starts criticizing me. I reply that as a revenge I will then do something to make her feel the same way she makes me feel with all her comments. While this is a rather habitual mental reaction, I notice that contrary to other times I don't feel anything at that very moment. Still, as part of my revenge scheme I take her and turn her upside down in front of all the DCs in the room to publicly humiliate her.

As I stare at her, I notice that she just stays there, like a motionless puppet and become lucid. We're in a very large meeting room with a long table in the middle and lots of DCs participating in some corporate event. I'm in a daring mood and decide it's time to defy social rules by getting on the table in the middle of this meeting. Then I almost lose lucidity being carried away by thoughts of how all of the world's problems may be solved by by issuing unlimited credit cards to the entire population.

I keep thinking about this issue as I leave the place and continue towards an unknown city center. There to help me focus more I shout out loud "I am dreaming". There was a slight instability so this helps me ground as well.

Then I remember the invisibility task and go in the middle of the road pretending to be invisible.There are cars coming from all directions but as soon as I pay attention to them, they hit the breaks and spin a bit. I turn around and the same thing happens again. Then I see this huge truck coming in my direction. I start waving hands, checking if the driver can see me. He doesn't hit the brake or slow down and the truck is quickly coming closer. I step to the side to avoid the impact. There's little space between me and the truck, my uncontrolled expectations cause it to fall sideways on top of me, where I feel this huge weight on me. I try to move and free my head, but this results in a physical feeling, which gives me the impression I have just moved in my bed. I expect to wake up any moment but get an FA instead.

I believe that I have woken up for real and the first thing I notice is this piano music coming from the outside. I'm actually in the neighbors where we used to live some time ago and look to find where the music is coming from. I see this girl that I remember (possibly from another dream but could be false memory) who got that piano there and something about her. As if that isn't enough, the balcony is crowded - many people in their 20s and 30s dressed with business attire as if attending some sort of event. I'm think this is just too much when I am trying to fall asleep and decide this can only be a dream, reminding myself that I was trying to ld. Can't member how, but it seems I lose consciousness after that and have another FA.

I think in the beginning, I'm looking from the window to see what's down but then the scene changes and we move to this wooden porch. I initially see this strange big animal that looks suspiciously like a DS, I can't tell what kind of animal it is. Then there is a smaller one and I'm still trying to identify the large one. I'm starting to have some real doubts about this and begin to count the animals, one now looks like a bear and can't remember the rest but there's four of them. I conclude this is a dream and go to interact with one of the animals. It looks like a very large black boar/tapir and as I place my hand on its snout, it bites me and it even hurts.

I move slightly to the left and examine the rest of the area, where I notice a number of elephant-like creatures. I think they are separated from the porch, but no cage, it looks much like in a zoo. At some point the elephants begin to distort in features, open mounts and start roaring very louldy in a generally unpleasant manner. I try to stop them by thinking I want them to stop, but nothing happens and more join the roaring event. I remain there staring at them as they do so, kind of calm, but there's also this deeper inner response to their roaring, which surely is what is affecting them. I think that the problem is exactly this feedback loop - I am thinking that they are roaring, therefore they continue roaring. Then conveniently, I recall the inivible task and think it can be applied quite nicely here. I think that I am invisible. To my genuine surprise, at this very moment all the roaring stops for good.

I'm curisous to how far I can take this with my supposed invisibility and turn around and try to sneak out, while carefully listening for any reaction. The dream fades.

Notes: I have reduced B6 dosage to 50mg as previously it made me too wakeful. Recent valerian series - characterized by difficult recall, lower lucidity levels and more bizarre occurrences, in particular animals.

Date: 21 Jan

Entry 2/2

I thoroughly review in head the previous dreams and get more insomnia

Vaguely recall these two as I fell asleep afterwards.

DILD: I am in this yard like it was in the past, much wider, etc. Know I am dreaming and think of music. It think there was happiness, confidence and possibly thoughts about something before this part.

I start to sing or expect to hear a song. My subcon picks up a dream remix of "heal the world" by M. Jackson. I concentrate on making it sound like sung by a choir and hear the music loudly coming from everywhere and into me. Notice a few instruments too, really nice. I keep singing with the music but at some point I don't know the lyrics so that makes it hard for the music to continue. In addition, the more I become one with the music coming all around me, the more I lose sight of the yard and the dream and become blind. The dream soon fades.

I may have a micro awakening or so, no review, continue sleepying.

DILD:Don't remember the beginning of the dream. I am in this room, talking to bf and open and close a few doors, where I think about not locking them as it is a dream.

Bf is going somewhere but before I can say anything else, he vanishes. There's a stick that I decide to leave outside, should I need it for defense? I also notice a strange gurgling sound coming from a pipe, find it interesting. I go back to the same room, there were lots of bed there before but now it's a single connected bed the size of four beds is covering most of the room.

I remember I wanted to play with my ipad, so I try to summon it by drawing its shape with my fingers. It's funny because I do this instinctively rather than consciously. While there's a rectangular shape in progress, it isn't working to produce an ipad and on the bed just below my hands is my ipad so I grab it and try to stretch the frame. It happens, just as if I was dragging the image of a frame on a PC. I expand the screen to a TV size, then have to apply a bit more stretching as it does not stay in the desired shape for long. It gets small again. I think about trying to control the image.

Then something happens outside and now there are two scary zombi-like DCs and they are about to enter the place. I try to close the door although know they will get in anyways. I decide to face them and affect them. Actually, I feel quite confident and no matter how ugly they are (especially one with something coming out of his mouth), I just feel positivity and so spread it to them. They become quite happy and we just hang in there like drunk buddies. I stare in the eyes of one of them, he feels like a phantom rather than real person and is not looking at me with any purpose/driving force. The dream soon fades.

I black out before being able to journal and have a few other dream fragments.

Date: 21 Jan

Entry 1/2

Pre bed: 3mel

Wbtb: 1/3 latte, had trouble falling asleep (external factors)

At some point, I begin to feel energetic as has been occasionally the case, but interrupt the process by visiting the restroom. Finding a comfortable position is not easy.

WILD: Finally, I turn to my lhs and remain still for some time. Then find myself staring at this DC woman with green blouse, it feels like I'm in.

I make cautious movements, trying to get up from the same position I was sleeping, initially just move my head. A slight scene change, I am now in my old room. I begin rocking sideways, the way I did at the beginning of another ld. This makes me feel more comfortable/fit in my dream body. Then I fully get up. The dream feels slightly unstable and I head for the window, where I tear down the curtains and look outside.

It is dark as hell, no light in the apartment and not a single light in the entire town. I remember to look at the sky - it's mostly clear, a slight mist and no stars at all. I look to my right and feel a bit creeped out. It is dark there. My worry is that I might summon something by habit. I recall I wanted to and shortly do breathing exercises. The effect is very powerful, I feel lots of saturated energy coming in and as part of me.

I decide to get in and turn around, it is a bit brighter in the room. I head towards the switch and turn it on. No light. Then I concentrate on the bulb and try to make light radiate from it, there's some effect but the room does not get brighter. I imagine another lamp and try to do the same with similar results.

Maybe I can use some candles, so I summon three small blue candles and work hard to light them. I've always thought that lighting a candle should be easy in a dream, but it turns out not. I just can't imagine the fire I guess. The wicks get bigger and fluffier and the candles change to larger ones and I make some fire-like sparks with my hands, rubbing the wick, hoping it will catch fire and use the other candles to spread it. They appear to have a ghostlike fire now, but don't emit much light as I place them around. I am annoyed with my abilities, but feel that I just need to do some fire gazing irl to improve them.

I retreat to the bed and examine the furniture. There's lots of stuff around and it looks as if I am back in this room. I wonder about how accurate the proportions are. It's exactly the same size. Most of the objects belong to the particular time frame when I lived there, but there is the blanket from our current home. Then a sofa from our old place appears for my amusement. I think about doing more breathing exercises (maybe just a few breaths?, not much done or effect) and contemplate on my life while living there. In the meantime, it is a much brighter day outside, when did that happen? Cool!

At some point I notice that I am holding a melting candle in my hand and decide to extinguish it and put it aside, but somehow feel that this symbolic act means the end of the dream. Indeed, just a bit later, the dream starts to thin out.

I think I did touch on my body very briefly, but it might have been a in-dream chain.

DEILD/DILD: I eagerly wait for the next scene, wondering if it will be in the same place. I see (kind of like in third person) myself walking in bathrobe in this place. I'm in properly now and have the ability to look around and choose where I want to go. It's inside a building and I look at this open door which reveals a softly lit bedroom apartment. I briefly consider it, but prefer to go outside, so head towards the door. It seems that it is still winter, piles of semi-thawed snow and I am not properly dressed, but for once boldly go outside. I try to phase through the glass door, but it's solid so I just open it. As I pass through the back entrance of the building and yard I see that part of the yard is sunlit and feel happy about that. Maybe I will finally have the opportunity to look for a palace looking building once I get to the street. I also think about possibly being invisible, but not sure how to apply at this point.

There are different levels of the side of the building, so I have to maneuver by climbing near a balcony to manage reaching the front of the building. I see a weirdly shaped gray cat there and wonder if it is a real cat and can see me (cats are supposed to see things like people possibly obeing), but it doesn't react like it would if that were the case. It's controlled by my thoughts and comes closer. There's something not very catlike in it, like another sort of animal I can't identify. I don't want to get too involved (and have it stuck to me like a blanket) so ignore it and think about finding the palace. There are only normal buildings around and I think I need to get in the middle of the street where I would get a clearer (trees here) view of the buildings and hopefully think of or see something appropriate.

In the middle of the street and my mood is great, sun is shining brighter too. I do some sort of bounce where I float and remain mid air and then gently float up. Very pleasant feel. I come near this tree with very small bipinnate leaves (possibly closest to honey locust tree, but with thicker leaves), it looks very beautiful. I'm starting to lose height so wonder if I should use the nearby thin end of the branch to hold on to, but with the delicate tree leaves this is not going to be very nice for the tree. I prefer not to do any mess on the tree even if a dream tree.

[mood change]

In the meantime, I see two female DCs that I identify as bitches down on the street. My attention is directed at them, I want to and then do something to one of them. I briefly wonder why the hell do I have these desires with those bitches, one of them looks a bit like Rachel Weiss. Luckily, even after what I have done, I manage to control my impulse and don't get a sexy feeling. I think about my tasks again. I am now in what reminds me of my school but the building is kind of shifty/unstable. I think that maybe I should summon my dad and he will drop me off the palace. The dream fades.

Date: 10 Jan

Pre bed: turmeric

Sleep was rather bad, like I was lacking some sleep chemicals, recall from non-lds pre bed - close to zero.

Wbtb: felt sleepy, had 1/3 latte

DILD+DEILDs: In a room and there's this kid from my childhood and he is somewhat grown up now. I am thinking about that. He's naked from the torso up and is sweating while vacuum cleaning. I am sitting behind a desk, contemplating and the thought that I was supposed to be lding comes to mind.

I begin to examine the surroundings and wonder if this could be a dream. Yet my thoughts are so orderly and organized at this moment and everything feels more like real life than dream (no usual dreamy feeling).

I keep thinking in what feels like a daylife manner, reflecting on lack of dream feeling. I know that in such a case I have to perform a RC, but I don't see any sense (like it's possibly going to fail). Something in me tries to convince me and kind of distantly makes me feel that right now my body is in horizontal position and asleep. I conclude that it is a dream and remember my goals. There is a black girl with ponytail and I reverse the inital plan (make an old man younger for the opposites task) and decide that I will make a potion to make her age instead. I feel conscientious about doing this to a little girl and how evil it looks, but really want to see the results.

There are a number of small items like two small cups, nail-size gemstones and something else I can't recall. While the dream is generally very stable, it begins to thin out at this point and I am left feeling concentration wise powerless and slowly find myself back in my body. Not ready to let go I remain still and short afterwards the I am back in the same dream.

It comes slightly as a surprise that I succeeded to resume from the same place, but welcome it and continue mixing my potion that looks like a shot of cough syrup. If I am not mistaken by the time I'm done mixing the dream thins out again and I am shortly back in my body.

The dream resumes again. This time I wait a bit before undertaking any task related action, thinking it may be proper to stabilize at this point so I unconvincingly rub my hands and run my fingers through a nearby towel, feeling it's texture. At this point the little girl and my childhood friend are nowhere in sight. I move away from where I was standing and look around, the entire room looks extremely realistic and detailed, filled to the brim with objects. It's like I am really in someone's room or a life memory. There are way too many objects for me to memorize so I don't try to, just remember a number of toy boxes with something written on the them in red, and a very prominent display of video games. There are two black gaming machines like from the late 80s.

The DC of my bf comes from somewhere as I am examining the room. Suddenly, I feel coldness on my feet and look below to see that I am barefoot and feel the cold coming from the green tiles on the floor. This is simply amazing and this whole dream feels incredibly life like detailed and stable (not so much vivid as detailed). I analyze this and share it with my bf who agrees with me. At this point I briefly wonder whether I might have run accross a smart DC and should ask some questions, but then remember my other tasks.

This time it feels appropriate to summon a DC and work from there. I decide I want to call Mrs. and think about her. The part of the apartment where I am looking, mentally calling for her is a bit dark and I briefly worry a scary DC might appear instead, but in a second, a DC that closely resembles her comes in. She has some sort of hat/bandage on the head. I get closer and begin to examine her face, she has lots of wrinkles on her forehead, around the mouth and saggy cheeks. I place my palms above her face to cover the places I want to change and then move my hands away. Initially, her face remains the same, but after a few more procedures the wrinkles visibly diminish. She doesn't look as young as I wanted but at least her skin is in much better condition, as if she just had a facelift.

Somewhere around this moment, the dream fades again. I know the drill and continue as usual, in the meantime become worried about my memories after each blackout/deild. I mentally count the number of blackouts to be sure, 3.

Back in the same room. I feel that I have spent too much time with this task, while there were other main tasks I had in mind. Time to go out and look for a palace. I head for the window and look down. Nooo! The whole dream continues to be worryingly detailed and realistic and it doesn't feel like a good idea to jump out of the window. I gather courage and hang on to nearby windows and water pipes to go down.

On the street I look around for a suitable building but become overwhelmed. In every direction I look are closely packed residential buildings. Finally, one of the streets seems somewhat less cluttered with a larger building at the distance that leads me to believe there's enough room for a palace round the corner. As I head in that direction, I have to wait for a large industrial truck part that's slowly coming out of a garage to make a turn and continue in, of course, the same direction as me. I manage to squeeze between the building wall and the large truck part and reach the end of the street.

Unfortunately, this turns to end of town cars-only road with lots of concrete and weirdly shaped boulders, cars passing by in close proximity. I think that I don't want to change the dream too aggressively as not to compromise the coherence. But maybe not everything is lost, I just have to find a way to cross over and go to what seems like a more appealing part of town. The dream fades.

Date: 08 Jan

Pre bed: 3mel

Wbtb: 1/3 latte, around 34 mg caffeine

I'm quite sleepy and resist waking myself too much, but still try to stay as awake as possible while in bed, repeating mantras and goals. I fall asleep with some long deep REM rebound.

DILD: It's a very long dream where me and parents get ready for a trip. Then I meet a DC that feels like a kindred sprit, I am eager to discuss with him possible solutions to a problem we both have.

A few moments later, I realize that this is a dream and remember my goals, freeze water and go fishing. The guy disappears somewhere. I am walking in what looks like a park and as I think about the task, I see that there are large puddles of water all around. Initially, I try to use them for the task even though they are too shallow and begin freezing them by willing it as well as by placing my hands down over one of them, where while they freeze, they emanate coldness and there's a cool mist effect lifting from the puddles! But then I realize this isn't going to work for the task and walk a bit further where there's a much larger and deeper body of water, like a pond.

I will the water to turn to ice, but to my surprise nothing happens. This annoys me. I contemplate whether to just get on the water as if it is frozen, but am uncertain if it will work, if I continue to expect to sink if I step on it. In the meantime, the water finally freezes. When I look at the surface, I see that part of it begins to melt already and dig with my hands in the softened ice to make a hole. This happens quite easily with no discomfort from the cold. There's some coldness, but it's ok, since I didn't think about it too much. I put my hands through the hole, reaching as far as I can and expecting to run across a catch.

I wait for a while but there's nothing around them and it gets kind of creepy what might be lurking in the darkness below the ice. In the area that's partially covered with ice, I can now see a number of small fish swimming around and succeed in catching one. It is a small tropical butterfly type fish but silver and red. As I hold it, my bf appears next to me and I tell him to take a picture, which I so much wish I could bring to rl, but before he can take the pic, the fish escapes.

I become so happy that have completed the task, I lose lucidity and begin to tell the dream to myself. After a while, I realize the dream is still going. Now I'm on the street in some neighborhood, there is an unconscious movement from my part and I end up floating in mid air, slightly above the ground, very stable though. I correctly recall this feeling from many dreams I had and exclaim to myself that taking off isn't as difficult as I have thought (previously irl). This is a good opportunity to practice a bit of flying and I do some flight manipulation, where I try to think of the direction and my body flies well in that direction. Then I try to take a turn and go in the opposite direction, but it doesn't quite work.

More rather random movements mid air and then I fly high up near a tall residence building, where I climb the last three stories using my hands. I somehow take a step back (see the building from a distance, although I am at the level of the third to last story). A black dotted panther on the balcony catches my attention. It looks kind of small, but actually it is the right size compared to the balcony and the stuff around it. The whole building seems small as if I am looking at it from a distance, yet I am very close to it. I briefly pay attention to that, but then wonder no more. There is a dalmatian in the apartment with the panther and I just so love exploring people's places, like in many non-lds. On the balcony below is a centipede, a very long one, apparently the same size as the panther (fits the balcony lenght). It doesn't look very appealing and I see two more on different balconies, I become vaguely aware that I am causing the one-many effect.

At some point I discarded the idea of going for Toty, because I thought the dream might end, but since it's still going, I decide to give it a try. Somehow, I go down to the ground and begin exploring a dream version of a familiar street. The bus station is here, only residential buildings, some larger buildings appear, but nothing that looks like a palace. I head towards the larger buildings that seem suitable and try to think that one of them is a palace. It starts to change, more and more detail is added and it becomes a flashy top notch casino. I still believe I could change it to a palace by trying to add a few columns at the entrance, but just increase the level of detail/casino quality.

I move on to the next building's entrance, which I recognize as some sort of amusement area. There's a distant dream memory also at work. Since I don't feel I'll get anywhere further with the palace, I eagerly get in, looking forward to having some fun. At this point I remember a dream where I took a super cool ride at a place that looked like this and become very excited. The lobby of the place where they sell the tickets is visitor empty, there's just the guy that sells the tickets, a girl that will ride with me and a male DC. The tall male DC next to my right is accompanying me to the cashier and I get a number of false memories and begin to have romance thoughts about him.

The DC at the desk gives me weird instructions of how to properly hold to the cart and my behavior while next to the girl that's also taking the ride. She is new, so I have to be careful. Bla bla, my lucidity level is dropping. I go to the girl and we wait to be let in to the ride but the dream finally fades and I wake up.

#262 - WILD - 4:55AM
WBTB 4AM: 4 peppermint green tea bags

I wake from a short non lucid dream and roll over to glance at the clock. I feel really wakeful, but with much effort, I relax my mind enough to get back to sleep. After a few minutes, I start lose my concentration but I notice vibrations and that's enough to pull me back just a bit. I begin to feel really excited and my heart rate increase but I manage to calm myself enough. I focus on the vibes for a moment to maintain the transitional state. After a moment I start trying to "move".

After some effort I suddenly and unexpectedly I roll out of bed landing face first on the floor. I pick myself up but feel something like the sheets attached to my head and back making any movement sluggish. I ignore it the best I can and walk away. After a few steps I feel free but I stagger around like a drunk man.

When I reach the main room, I realize I am totally blind. I decide to combat this by thinking about what the room should look like in the day time. After a few seconds the lights sort of fade in and I see in full vivid color. I am pleased, but also a little surprised this worked so well. I feel like I have gained some equilibrium and begin walking toward the front door. I can't help but notice sunlight filtering in through the blinds as I make my way outside.

When I step out on the porch I notice that it feels very cold even-though all the snow has melted in this version of reality. I don't like this so I shout out loud, "I am impervious to cold!" I am always amazed that I don't talk in my sleep when I shout so I do it few more times paying close attention to the odd sound of it. After the cold fades, I try to remember my goals. The basic TOTM comes to mind; Ask a DC for his or her resolution(s) for the new year. I immediately begin search around for a dream character.

The neighborhood looks way different than normal but I see nothing too crazy. There is a dark brown, old Ford pick-up parked at an unfamiliar house next door. I take a closer look and it appears to be running. As I start walking over, I notice a man sitting in the passenger side. He looks like Cousin Eddie from Lampoon's Vacation but a little chubbier in the face. I become way too excited that I found a DC so quickly and worry that I will wake up before I get close enough to talk to him. Because of the excitement, I deliberately walk slow and calm.

When I reach the truck, the man notices me and smiles. He seems genuinely happy to see me and gets out to greet me. He puts a hand up and we high five, but something odd happens. I get a double vision, like a dream glitch, of him connecting with my hand but also missing and hitting my face. I flinch a little but mostly try to ignore the strangeness. I decide to waste no more time and ask, "So, what's your new year resolution"?
He immediately answers, "Australian zebra zombie apocalypse."
I laugh a little and repeat it back making sure I got it right. He gives me a nod. Amused, but slightly annoyed I say, "Ok. That's not a new year resolution." Then, jokingly add, "you dick." Now, more serious, "No really. What is it?"
His reply was just as confusing as the first. With a flourish of his and ending with pointing at me he says, "Live from New Zebra, It's Saturday Night!"
I give up and just laugh. I play along, "Ok. Before the year's up, I want to see a bunch of zombie zebras from Australia on your porch." I punctuate my demand by making a swirling pointing gesture at this front stoop. I feel like I am done here and start to walk away, but quickly change my mind. I am actually enjoying this too much to leave and I can't think of my other goal. I lean my back on the side of his house as I ask another question, "So, what's going to happen to me today? Anything significant?"
He thinks for a second and begins to speak. but now the dream is fading. I faintly hear him say, "Oh no. Nothing special just...

I wake up.

Date:03 Jan

Wbtb: around 50 caffeine (latte), way too wakeful again

WILD: I finally feel as if I am not in bed anymore but somewhere else, so allow myself to look around (don't remember opening the eyes?). Yes, I am in an unknown room that has a slight resemblance to grandma's place.

At this point I recall 3 tasks and notice that there isn't a single DC here. The dream feels unstable and I recall that we talked how 501 would examine his hands in detail to anchor himself in the dream and decide to do so. I have a good look at my hands, which look quite realistic and similar to my real ones and move on to my arm where I concentrate on the fine hairs. I also remember to do the old classic stabilization where I lick my arm but with little effect. I still feel the dream slipping away and nervously walk around, thinking maybe I would try this opposite task I had in mind, but I begin to lose vision. The lower part of my vision becomes a blur and I begin to feel weightless, so conclude now isn't a good time for that particular task.

My vision gets somewhat better. I turn around and see a window, a good opportunity to get out of here. There is distinct coldness emanating from outside and I am sure it will help me freshen up and condense me back to normal. Before going out, I briefly wonder whether to bring a blanket or something, since the air is chilly. I open the window and push myself outside. In the meantime, a girl passes by carrying a blanket that she drops nearby. I ask her about her NY resolution but can't hear what she replies. The dream collapses.

DEILD: I very briefly touch on my body and concentrate on dreaming again. There's a confusing mid point dreamlet where I remain in darkness and can hear women talking around me, I keep still, waiting for the dream.

I feel a scene change, but decide I will wait a bit longer to allow the dream to fully form and maybe it will be more stable. I finally conclude it is ok to move and begin exploring. I am in my old room and can see that the voices from the previous part belong to a number of women. They are sitting on couches around a table with food and drinks as if there's some sort of party going on. A friend from school is also there.

I remember the NY resolution task and make an announcement that I would like to hear what their resolutions are. My friend says "I want some juice" and points at the table. A bit unsatisfied with the answer I move on to the next woman who looks in her forties and repeat the same question. She just stares at me with her mouth open. I wait a bit but not a single word comes out. There's another woman sitting next to her and I address her "what about your beautiful friend sitting next to you?", I feel as if I am moderating some sort of show. She says something about a friendship club in New York. I try to memorize as much as possible. The dream soon ends.

I make a quick review in mind and wonder if I should try to go back for more but really need to visit the restroom.

I also remember a fragment that I can't allocate, where I was looking at a blue/grayish backpack with something written on it by CL.

Date: 25 Dec

Wbtb: sleepy so only 5-10min with 35-40 mg caffeine (Red Bull)

Dream quality: vivid, shifty items, recall evading

The ld part is preceded by a short non-ld FA fragment I barely recall.

LD Frag: In the next scene, I am walking down the street lucid. There was something going on here, not sure what. I decide I want to have some fun (part habit part task) climbing up a building. The dream is already very shifty. I go up climbing this building where I easily place my hands even though the distance between the frames of each window fitting my left and right hand separately is out of day life proportion. I keep on climbing but when I reach the end of the building, last floor, another one appears, I climb it, this repeats two more times, then I think about the roof and finally reach it. Some thoughts about having to draw the wall of china, looking for a place to do it. Evading recall at this point but I want to go down and the whole thing happens quite quickly. I descend but at the same time am still holding on to the building with one hand. As I almost reach the ground I stop and look to see what's going on - my hand has stretched all the way down to where I am. I have some more thoughts about this and as far as I can remember the dream soon ends.

Not sure if I touched on my body to deild or chained in dream. Don't remember.

LD: In an office building now, want to cross over to next building, very distracted as something is going on in the building, announcement to all employees which are going somewhere. Between the two buildings are a few red wires and I am confident that I will be able to walk on them. As I try to adjust them for an easier use, they change so that there are two additional wires I could eventually hold on to with my hands.

Not sure if I cross the entire distance or just a part of it, memory is hazy, in the next moment I also do some vertical climbing. This time I have the realization that there are invisible horizontal lines that have been helping me with my climbings all along, therefore it should be easy to climb even on empty space. I touch the air above me, trying to feel an edge or something to hold on to. Initially there's nothing, then I hold on to something, although I also summon some sort of intangible wall/building part as well. I climb a bit upwards in the air.

I finally recall the snowman task. It's dark and there is already some snow on the street but it's not enough. I scan the area, looking for a place with more snow. Initially see these kids that are playing with the snow, in the process of building a snowman. I have a mix of real and false memories, where I remember that this is how Steph completed the TOTM, she built the snowman together with some kids. I don't want the task execution to be exactly the same, therefore I go to another place.

Here there's also lots of snow on the ground, cars and there are two snowmen in progress. I'm also thinking about journalling at this point and whether it is ok to use the half-ready snowmen. I decide to add the finishing touches on one of them and decorate the head. Conveniently, there are a number of items right next to the snowmen, so I just pick up the carrot nose and also put a woolen blue hat on it. I get some sort of dream memory from the hat and remark that the snowman looks very much like D (a schoolmate, who also makes lots of appearances in my dreams, come to think about it he does wear a blue hat). Two other classmates are now here and we are discussing this, while I am also thinking about how to journal this dream.

Without much effort and while I am not looking at him, the snowman turns into the real D and looks kind of pissed off. We irritate him more by making laughing noises behind his back. Can't recall the conversations. Another classmate appears, D is now friendlier I address them both to help me draw the wall of China. Me and the other classmate turn to look at what's across the street where I want to make the wall of China appear. He tells me he doesn't quite know how to draw it but will try.

With no further involvement (apart from comments I can't recall) from his side, I find a spot in the distance and make a few predetermined moves with my hand. Immediately, I get a sort of a large long rocky structure, obviously not what I want. I look away, say something to my classmate then try again in another place. This time the result is better, it is a close match to the Great Wall, although its existence is uncertain/shifty. Some thought processes going on again, do not draw it again or you will change it, do not lose it out of sight, now I need to get there. It shortly disappears, after couple more thoughts and looking appears again. Now it is on a much more convenient place.

We are are at the bottom of an overcrowded with items hill and the wall of China, which has a middle age touch to it, slightly lighter stone color, is stretching from the bottom of the hill to the very top. I enter and get on top of the structure, which is made of small steps in the middle. Some task confusion, I take a couple of steps to make it count (even though this wasn't part of the task). Then remember what I was supposed to do - vandalize.

I look around, the two walls to the side are made of lots of lined statues and I take a heavy metal statue and use it to start breaking the rest. Then I come across a miniature with one of the Sumerian gods/guardians wondering what's that doing here. I don't want to break it. In the meantime, next to the wall the surroundings have changed and I am now in some sort of open air Asian temple, where they honor the ancestors. There is also a creepy dark female deity statue near the part with the wall of China. I feel bad for recking havoc in this place. It surely is enough for the task. What was next - apologize? (I truly think this is part of the task). No, I have to fight the authorities. But then, let's apologize anyways, I do so. Ok, now I have to find some Chinese to fight, I try to summon them, but the dream thins out and I wake up.

Date: 21 Dec

Natural wake: 100mg Gingko

Wbtb: 60 mg caffeine, latte

As I am staying still, relaxing, I get the familiar sense of gentle tingling or whatever, but change positions too often to allow it to deepen and possibly feel my dream body detach.

I partially recall zooming in on the beard (barely grown) of someone I know and having some thoughts about it, but was quickly pulled out of the dreamlet.

In the beginning before the wild, I vaguely recall experiencing similar physical sensations of someone trying to interact with me, but ignored them to fall asleep.

Mini-wild: I finally find myself in a dream, looking at this guy I know, there's another DC next to him as well. I try to engage in the dream, so place my hand on his head and touch the fence. This is on the street of my current place. It's quite dark and I carefully try to move, but my head is slightly constrained and I have some sort of tunnel vision (not sure if seeing with one eye or two). I manage to turn around and think about moving with super speed. Without much effort my body speeds up towards the end of the street, I take a turn and continue moving super fast on the next street. The dream quality is still bad, dark and my speed moving makes me see lots of people and items quickly coming in and out of sight. I slow down to contemplate on my goals, whereby I try to remember the exact sequence of things I wanted to do. Just as I remember, the dream falls apart and I find myself back in bed.

I am back in my real bed, aware of the true and exact position of my body, yet at the same time, I have the very physical sensation of someone touching me, trying to wake me up. I think this person also said something. The whole thing is super realistic and I begin to wonder if someone is really trying to wake me up. I ignore what's happening, but the physical feeling of there being someone and wake shaking me persists. I feel creeped out and turn over then it disappears.

Too awake now to continue sleeping.