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Meditation + WBTB procured me two lucid dreams. Throughout one lucid dream I was rubbing my hands to stabilize. It worked to some extent. When I walked outside my house, everything was overcast like it was a rainy, depressed 7AM in Texas. It felt quite cold as well. Tried to change the sky, but things just got darker. When into some houses; I was looking for someone.

Onward and upward.

Morning of September 25, 2017. Monday.



In my dream, I find myself with a personified version of the preconscious that I created in the 1980s. Although this form is active every now and then, like most forms of the preconscious, there is typically no connection to waking life or the pretense of “interpretation”.

This male in my dream as the role of the RAS (reticular activating system), which is what biologically controls the waking transition and its symbolism between consciousness and unconsciousness, is of the “Hierarchy”, a term I created in the 1980s for the nature of the dream state and its various core components and real-time symbolism including circadian rhythms symbolism. Its inherent waking symbolism is of a necessarily biological authority, unrelated to waking life. (Dream symbolism is more about the nature of being unconscious than being awake, kind of a no-brainer really, yet most of society presently completely ignores this truth.)

Alex (Alexander; chosen because it means “defender of men” or “protector of mankind”, a good analogy for RAS) and I are in an unknown building. It may be a library, as shelves and dividing walls that do not reach the ceiling are present. There is an unfamiliar elderly woman present. Though I am never lucid (or even subliminally lucid), we are here to research the nature of the Hierarchy, and the woman mentions some sort of ancient document, which supposedly relates to this organization that secretly rules and protects mankind.

At one point, Alex and the woman are on the other side of a shelf that is almost up to the ceiling. I can hear him confirm that the document is genuine. Wondering what my role in all this is, I decide to climb up to the top of the shelf.

I look through a few boxes on the top shelf. I look down and see an unusual anthropomorphic crescent moon cookie cutter, though it is vertically oriented rather than of a logical cookie cutter design. It has the essence of an ancient artifact and I find it interesting. I ask Alex if I can have this and use it in my work.

He informally tells me that there are “no cookie cutters” in the Hierarchy, more so referring to the prospective role of being a cookie cutter in the Hierarchy.

Later, I am with my older brother Dennis (who still lives in America and last seen in real life in 1994). I tell him about the Hierarchy and about Alex. I say that Alex has “limitless diamonds” and owns whatever he wants.

The moon represents the circadian rhythms factor of dreaming (as night is typically associated with the dream self while daylight and the sun represent the dynamics of conscious self identity). Its being a cookie cutter signifies the nature of lucid dreaming under conscious self identity creation. The fact that there are apparently “no cookie cutters” in the Hierarchy translates as RAS being of a biological factor and that one should not have full conscious control of circadian rhythms cycles, which could damage the physical body. This does not limit or suspend any potential for apex lucidity of course, which mostly occurs in the morning anyway within my last dream. The cookie cutter’s position on the shelf is more about the dynamic of this part of the sleeping and dreaming cycle, the moon’s crescent form signifying my percentage of unconscious awareness and percentage of vividness of the dream state (for example, a full moon would indicate full awareness while in the dream state). Liminal space dividers in the dream state are symbolized in real time by walls, fences, or high shelves. My act of climbing the shelf is symbolic of my dream self (subliminally) seeking more understanding of RAS and the preconscious.

My comment to Dennis about the diamonds relates that the preconscious and RAS are of the main biological power behind sleeping and waking transitions. Being within a large diamond is one of the Mastership meditations that in part represents clarity of thought even when unconscious (though again, I do not have viable lucidity in this dream).

This dream is mainly the result of a new variant of affirmation-based dream preparation. Instead of using “after” and doing the count after a particular affirmation, I have changed this to “anytime after” for a number of reasons. For example, “anytime after” is far more powerful than “after”, as “after” would otherwise denote “immediately after” or “soon after” while “anytime after” would be far more likely to integrate into the continuity of a later dream, either literally or symbolically depending on the desired outcome.

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D1 - Abstract kind of dream, different persona are fighting (a bit) over whos incharge of me. I see them as floating heads, in groups of 4, sort of in bubbles. The group in charge have a woman head honcho, she is distinctive as her face is white and green due to the lighting and her eyes are blue & green but the colours are split like when people try and get a 3d effect by splitting the colours on the image (to be reassembled via 3d glasses).

D2 - There is an election going on with a load of people gathered in a park. I have had this park before in a dream about a college, in this dream however the white stone building in the centre of the park is a hall for voting.
The campaigning party are represented by a fluorescent light Greek blue colour, which is floating around in the air (kind of).

D3 - Had a rambling dream of travelling somewhere by bike I think.
Then I set off to work early morning, feeling quite pleased with myself that I am organised and will arrive on time before rest of family are even up.
I then look around in the early light and notice that in every direction there are towering plumes of black smoke, on the horizon. I think "oh shit, apocalypse" and hurry back home.

+ football play, I'm playing! [a lot of the time normally I'm just observing the play]. I line up on the right side at the line of scrimmage, looking down the line towards the center and the ball, seeing the heads/hands of the players on both sides. I'm keeping my eyes only on the ball and ignoring the snap count, because I know there are deceptive snap words. In fact I do see false starts/offside movements by both sides a little and wonder if there will be a flag, but no the ball is snapped and I start running. I make my way down the field to the defensive secondary line and there I'm blocked by a big defender and I just can't make my way around him. The ball does not come to me but to a teammate, but he reaches me and I wriggle free to receive a lateral handoff from him. Then I start running [I now realize] the other way back down the field.

+ in the car, a guy is in the back, and my dad, I'm in the front seat (standing), I notice LB is there too, in a revealing peach colored outfit showing a lot of skin including a thong showing off a great asset, and I catch the guy in the back staring at her behind.

+ parking a car in a spot that may be a bit hard to get out of (hard to turn around), there is a parking attendant there. Talking with a woman about how I'm going to get to a certain spot, she's indicating I need to take one mode of transport that I think goes too far in the wrong direction, I explain that I've parked my car in [city Cu].

+ in a bathroom, walking back and forth, I see the toilet seat I want is covered with a seat guard ring made from a washcloth, I think this is a great idea rather than using a disposable toilet seat guard, someone in there asks me why I'm going back and forth all the time

+ [DO] I'm floating along the path of some vehicle with an unobstructed view out the front, it's driving over grass and curbs made from packed gravel, there is a conversation (me talking?) about how there are too many enumerated values for a certain variable in a program, I'm realizing that the uninitialized value can fully take the place of one of the enumerants, and I'm pondering this trying to think if it's really true or not while the vehicle continues on, making left and right turns

The events in my dream are kinda random but remembered a lot.


I'm trying to get into what looks like an elevator.

I'm hanging onto a rocky grassy area underneath something maybe like a bridge trying to get my girlfriend's attention.

There's a crowd of men in suits somewhere.

I ask my teacher if it's too late to turn in my homework and it looks like there's no one in the room we're in.

I see an old friend and I don't like what he says to someone.

I'm in a forest or tree area but I wasn't aware enough to know what I was doing there.

I really want to get back into actively practicing lucid dreaming. I miss being on here and discussing dreams with you people! What follows are a few of the most interesting dreams I've had lately.

09.16.2017

Lonliness (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Something has occurred that causes Cheyenne and Jake to forget about me. It's something like a spell or an alternate timeline where we never met and became friends. All I really recall is a rainy night, incomprehensible lonliness, and finally speaking to Cheyenne again even though she does not remember me.

09.16.2017

Foolishness (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

Note: This was basically expected. I took one 4mg tablet of Galantamine before bed and another during WBTB at 3 am. That is always a recipe for intense sleep paralysis, which was my goal. I'm trying to use it as a gateway for astral projection, or at least a good lucid.

I'm lucid, walking down the street where I grew up at night. Still affected by my previous dream, I summon Cheyenne to keep me company. I call out her name--- my usual method of summoning. A voice calls back from the darkness, but it's distorted and wrong. "YOU'RE not Cheyenne," I accuse the voice.

"Yes I am." The voice is normal now. Cheyenne approaches me from a dark path out of the trees by the edge of the road. Foolishly, I assume the original distortion must have been an effect of the sound bouncing off the almost tunnel like grove of trees. I am too desperate for companionship after my previous dream to question it further. I figure, this is a dream, so it's not REALLY her anyway.

Cheyenne walks with me back to my childhood home, where I lay down on a hammock around the side of the house. I am laying with my back to her, but it seems for a moment as though she has disappeared, much to my disappointment. If only that were the case...

Because suddenly I hear a demonic voice shriek from behind me, "FOOLED YOU!!!!" as a creature latches onto my back, cackling madly, its arm coming around to dig its long claws painfully into my chest. It falls with me into the dark void of sleep paralysis, mocking me with its shrill, shrieking laughter all the while.

My first thought is that I definitely had this coming to me. Despite my fear and pain, I remember telling myself NOT to try to wake up if I have SP tonight. I hold out for as long as I can, but eventually I give in to the fear and force myself awake.

09.21.2017

Final Destination (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

The early part of the dream is a bit vague. I'm helping someone with computer stuff. There's also a girl I like with pretty blonde hair.

It's as I'm leaving this place that things start to go downhill. My boss has gotten himself mixed up in some Deep Web murder club with an invamous serial killer/hacker named "Sabine." He's going to one of their meetings right now (apparently they meet in a physical place?) and I make the mistake of walking with him to his truck, which is parked outside the convention hall. He asks if I want to come with him and I almost do, but change my mind.

Unfortunately, during this brief span of time, I've drawn the interest of Sabine. I have the option to join or die, and I refuse to do either. But Sabine is seemingly everywhere, with eyes in all forms of technology. I have no idea how to stay constantly vigilant agains a club of murderers who are determined to stalk and kill me. There is also a paranormal aspect to what is happening, but I fear the Murder Club humans much more.

There is a person I'm trying to protect who is also being targeted. I think it's the pretty blonde girl from before. I remember holding her hand, and we might have kissed. Can't really remember this part too clearly. She is involved with the paranormal part of this--- she is a Star who has fallen to earth and needs to find her way home. She is missing a lot of her memory, though. In turn, I have "memories" of these events happening before, in alternate timelines.

I have a conversation with who I think is one of the murderers about what's going on as he mocks me and prepares to kill me. I realize that he's not actually one of the human members of the club; instead, he is a Reaper. I laugh at him, saying I'm not afraid to die at the hands of a Reaper and that he can just go ahead and kill me. He swings his scythe at me mut it hits an invisible barrier. I laugh again. "Looks like you can't do it." I know I am protected against the likes of him, because I know how to use my spiritual energy to defend myself. He wonders out loud what could have caused this. To throw him off his game, I say something about "the Frenchman," apparently referring to the fallen angel Asher. (Asher was a character of mine back in high school. An annoying French angel. In the dream, however, we knew each other from one of the alternate timelines.)

I end up in a bar with my Star friend. Asher bursts in the door, but he looks different than how I remember him. His famous blonde hair is dyed black. He also does not yet remember me from the other timelines, but I know that he will.

I'm now with Asher outside my current residence. Evil vines come from the woods and try to strangle him, but I set them on fire. They scream like banshees as they burn.

I was on the blacktop at school. Everybody was doing a bunch of crazy activities when I saw the only teacher who has a PHD in teaching, who we'll call Dr. B. I went to him, showing off my Frances the Mute CD.
"I have an album that I want you to listen to" I said. "it's an album called Frances the Mute by The Mars Volta. You won't be able to play it here at school because it's kind of inappropriate, but I want you to listen to this as soon as you get home." Or at least I said something like that.
"Ok, then. Sounds like a plan." He said. I then woke up.

In my dreams, I am almost always about 17. Sometimes I am 21. I am 37 IRL. In my dreams I visit people, I just hang out with them. I did this last night. I was lucid. I rode my bike to a friends house, it was a couple of guys, not guys I was interested in, just friends. One was working on his car. Something boxy in the late 90's fashion. The other was checking his phone. They were kind of nerdy, D&D type of guys. The one working on his car was a heavy set neckbeard type of male, in his early 20's and the other was a skinny, ginger with curly hair and an Adam's apple that screamed not my type. But we were friends, it was fun just sitting there smoking cigarettes, asking what they were up to and seeing if they were going to go to the "arcade" later. They weren't. He shared something important with me before I left, and I will share it in a minute. The arcade is a place I visited in another dream, over a year ago, but I visited it twice since. Everyone is there, all of my old friends from highschool, and all about 19 - or 21 is years old. Even dead friends are there, in the dream world there is no distinction. Dead or alive, we all exist as we were. I had never seen these two boys before in waking life, but I know that I know them. I know them. I know their souls somehow, we are friends, we are at ease with each other. The kind of ease where there is no sexual tension, the kind of ease when you can just hang out in silence looking at Facebook (even though 20 years ago FB didn't exist) on your phone and it is cohesive. After about an hour I took off and said goodbye. I told some other friends that I wanted to go to the Arcade and asked if they thought people would be there. They said yes. I knew that when I got there I would see several people from my past and it would be easy, like old times. Maybe have a beer and play a game of pool - even though I am an alcoholic and haven't picked up a bottle since 2013. But it is different there. This morning I learned that this place has a name, it is called the "Deepdown." There we don't age, the dead aren't dead, and alcoholism isn't a thing. There in the "Deepdown" we are young, we are immortal, the feeling of friendship and love prevails. The Deepdown is what I call the dreaming place, the lucid place. It is a real place. I know it's real, it is more than the firing of random neurons pretending it is real. I know it's real because I know my way around the Deepdown. There is a theater I can find, an old town that used to have people in in it before 1998, but they moved along to keep up with the tourism and the big box stores, the old ladies in Flo caps and aprons smoke cigarettes and point to pictures on the wall that show old pictures of big holiday parades, people lined up on the sides of the street to watch the floats, and the celebrities and to peek in the store windows. The restaurants are mostly empty, their decor is old Ponderosa Pine and Wagon Wheels, and cobwebs. Most of the store fronts are boarded up now. In the Deepdown my parents are young, they are in their 30's or 40's. They think I am a kid. I have to sneak out and being under the stars, smelling the grass, hearing the crickets as I zoom on my bike towards a place to meet my friends is exhilarating. Only in the Deepdown do I get to see these people, do I get to remember the thrill of being young and of being free and the smell of the night when it smelled like endless possibilities. Not all dreams take me to the Deepdown, some are shallow, some barely scratch the surface, you can tell-they are superficial. I don't know the people there. But in the Deepdown, when my subconscious has plunged through layers and layers of whatever it is that constructs the dark spaces between memories, I am in a real place. I've seen my friends who have passed from this earth, there they don't know they are dead, because there I guess they aren't. I'm totally lucid in this place, I could effect things, I could change the color of the sky or tell my parents I am 37 years old, but I don't. I just enjoy it. I marvel at how young they look. Call it what you want, I call it the Deepdown. Because that is how it feels, it feels like a whole other Universe, way Deep Down inside of the layers that constitute my awareness. I know it is called this because that is what my friend told me. I looked up at the stars and I smelled the sweetness of being young and out in the night with people I liked. I said- What is this place? The boy looked up at me, he looked through huge thin brass aviator glasses that had smudges on them and he took them off to clean them. He put them back on and he smiled at me. He said - "This is the Deepdown" He ran the words together just like that. I could see the words in my mind as he said them, they were together, not separate like we would say it here, but one word- the "Deepdown." "Why is that important?" I asked, excited to hear him say something I felt was significant. He looked at me bored. "In the Deepdown, you know them." And I did- I do. I know them. In the Deepdown, nothing changes, I know them, they know me. I woke up knowing for certain that the people I speak to, the friends I see in that place that he calls the "Deepdown" are people I know, just as I knew them then, unchanged and it is comforting to know I will go back again.

I was playing what looked like a JRPG. I was in the process of making a ship in the game which had a TV that you could play another JRPG on. Meanwhile, N and another friend of mine who we'll call V were talking when N noticed what I was doing.
"What are you doing?" She said, quickly stealing the WASD keys from me and moving my character off of the raised platform he was on. I responded with "i'm playing an RPG" and then moved my character to the right. This character's speed was so fast that I moved across the screen in less than a second. I then continued with what I was doing. I then woke up.

I was up in my room at night time when I looked at my hand. My pinkie finger bent like my thumb and I had six fingers. I then gained lucidity. I then went into the kitchen and straight to mmkk. "Dude, check this out!" I said to him a couple of times because I was so exited. I didn't do much after. Either that or I just don't remember it.

Me and a friend who I had actually talked to in real life after a couple of years -we'll call her MB- were talking possibly through the phone. I was in the middle of a suburb that almost had a cartoony aesthetic to it and I was playing a game on my phone called Chip. In this game, you controlled a Dorito shaped black chip as you maneuvered through obstacles on a black and white checkered rotating cylinder.

I flew in space, above planet, in some kind of exoskeleton looking spacesuit. It was dark grey, nearly black, helmet looked like head of owl, on the back I had eagle like wings, and I had also regular shape of rest of my body. Surface was covered by something like hard feathers (metallic?).
In front of me, the vast imperial army slowly closed distance to myself... Star destroyer next to star destroyer, clouds of TIE fighters.
I stood between them and planet with my hands and wings in gesture of stopping something and I told quietly: "Behold! This planet is mine. Leave in peace or be destroyed."
I saw chucking admiral in part of my visor muttering something like "fool", while imperial army didn't even pause.
From legs, hands and wings dark violet plasma flames appeared and I started complicated dance in between enemy ships, changing advance of TIE fighters in debris field fast. The star destroyers started barrage of shots, but I knew where to fly, so I weaved between shots... it looked like dance. There was no more chuckles. I close to star destroyer and with slash of hand I cut it from front to back in half. Not even stopping, I danced between shots and advanced from one star destroyer to other... destroying them as fast as Tie fighters.
Then admiral called Darth Darkness(I don't remember exactly whether it was darkness but it sound that way) to battle... and much bigger ship appeared, resembling Executor. I promptly changed my course and cut in half that majestic ship too. The fleet then retreated into hyperspace, leaving only debris field behind.

So I was sleeping trying to performe dark gestures that what I call it when I think I'm dreaming I'm trying to do lucid intervals where I can false replicate my dream body as if I'm still awake this is darkness control you have to replicate your body in still infamy as if just moving around the house this is called the mirror enslavement technique this is where you see yourself Ina mirror in a dream for the first time and you can do this in waking reality whenever so I was trying to astral project so I kept faking it and walking to the mirror just so I can enslave my subconscious to keep thinking over and over so it work so as I was enslaving my mirror persona I closed my eyes and just thought that I was surrounded by mirrors so I what faint and jolt acting upon if I were still looking at myself going to see myself in the mirror as I enslaved this humor I thought to myself how can imprison people Inside a looking glass that was under my control everytime someone look in a mirror or look upon glass

First day when I actually had to use 2 blankets, because it got chilly at night. Finally, I'm so over hot summer.

So, in a dream, I decide it would be a great time to WILD. I start to rock back and forth and I try to actually feel the motion. Like it happens when you imagine a motion while falling asleep, then when you are in HH, you actually start feeling it.

So I start rocking, I'm on a verge of feeling it, when someone in the dream disturbs me and I can't continue. Dangit.

I think this dream occurs after a brief awakening IRL. The memory is a little hazy for this one. I'm in my grandparent's apartment at night. I think there are some other people from the family there, but I don't remember if I interacted with them. At some point, I get lucid and for some reason I remember the Task of the Month about summoning a genie and making a wish. I enter a room, expecting the lamp to be there. I find it on the stand where there used to be a TV. It looks just like you'd expect, it's a small, golden lamp.

I start rubbing the lamp until some pink, slightly purple smoke came out of it. I cannot remember very well what the genie looked like, just that it had a vaguely humanoid form. Wanting to be able to change the dream scene easily, I tell the genie "I wish to be able to travel to any place I can imagine, instantly." I don't remember exactly what the genie did, but I imagined myself in a sunny beach, and suddenly I find myself in one. I am in a sandy island in the middle of the ocean. I them imagine myself back in the apartment and I teleport there. It is daytime now. I think the dream ends around here and I transition to a non-lucid nightmare, where I'm home at night and I pick up the phone but there is no response. I put it down and pick it up again and there is no sound. I say "Hello" and a very distorted voice mimics me. I put the phone down immediately.

I tell my uncle about this and he dismissed this saying it's my imagination and similar stuff has happened to him. He tells me about how there was a dog that appeared in the building at night and he thought it was a ghost until he caught it. I then drag him to the phone and I pick it up again. I start saying something and them a clear voice begins speaking a mix of english and jibberish at me. This startles me and I wake up