memorable

October 8, 2013

Interstate lake and hotel telekenisis
I'm southbound on the Interstate with my family, approaching our exit, and I'm surprised at how light traffic is. On the exit ramp, traffic finally grinds to a halt.

Now we're still on the off-ramp, except it's for foot traffic, not for cars. It's a long, wide line of people. We're standing on the ramp looking over the railing at the lake beyond. At a distance a ways in front of us, a short, wide waterfall is dumping water into the lake. There's some kind of outlet to our right going under the Interstate. It's a beautiful clear day, and the water is very reflective. Most of the lake is smooth, except for near the waterfall and the outlet. The whole scene is incredibly beautiful.

Eventually, we realize the line in front of us has moved quite a ways, and there's a big gap that's opened. We leave the
lake and hurry to catch up so we don't inconvenience the people behind us. As we walk, I think about how we used to have 2 interstate 109's, that they were always congested, and how much better things have been since they combined them into a single wide road.

We walk up hill, turn corners, climb stairs, etc, until we finally come out in a small house. All our shoes are wet. My kids scatter and take off their shoes; I go after them to collect the shoes and make sure they don't get lost. I'm supposed to be meeting with someone, so I apologize that I need to get the shoes, and I'll be with him in a minute. He understands.

Now I'm talking with one of my church elders, except that in the dream he's my boss. He's explaining that they debated
about whether or not I needed a pager, and finally decided that they'd just give me an old one that someone else wasn't using any more. There's a buzzing/ringing coming from deep inside my backpack, and I know it's my new pager. I can picture it: an oblong ball, shaped to fit in the hand, with a large silver toggle switch and a launch button with a red cover. When I find it and pull it out, it doesn't look like that at all. The size and shape are about right, but instead of switches and buttons, it has various fold-down panels. I open the one on the front-top and find some sliding pieces. When two of the pieces are slid together, it's activated; but if the third is slid in place, the first two can't make contact. It's some kind of security measure to make sure it doesn't get activated by accident.

When I look up from fiddling with the pager, I find myself in a gigantic hotel. I'm not aware of the ceiling or the far walls. A golden statue is mounted high up on the wall near me. As I look at it, it starts to glow. After a moment, the eyes start to glow red. and I realize I've left it for too long. I make a tapping gesture towards it and knock it off the wall. Down the hall, a fat freestanding pillar falls over. I make a kind of lifting gesture towards it, and it goes flying back into the wall, shattering. This is fun!

Now I'm at the end of the hallway, in a lounge area (still too big to comprehend). There are sofas, tables, and chairs scattered around, with people milling. A woman walks past near me carrying a mug of coffee. I make a kind of two-handed pinching gesture, bringing my hands together, and her coffee (just the liquid) streams out of her mug and forms a sloshing ball in front of my hands. I bring my hands further apart, and the ball grows until it's bigger than a basket ball; then I make another gesture and launch it a woman sitting on a couch, getting her all wet (thankfully it wasn't hot).

Now I'm in another room, large yet comprehendable, with another statue. I'm doing something to it. I know that this is all part of an experimental gesture-based game on a new system Nintendo is going to be releasing soon. I wonder why Nintendo forbade developers from making games with any sort of violence, but then I realize that violence is always the easy option, and that this restriction forces developers to really be creative and use the system to its fullest potential. After the fun I had in the hotel, I'm glad they made the decision they did.

Nuts at Brusters
I'm at Brusters' with my wife and the kids. It's not a normal Brusters' - it's a large sit-down restaurant with dark
furnishings and low lights. You still have to go up to the cash register in the middle of the restaurant to place your order.
It's our turn to order. The cashier is a late 20s woman. While Bethany figures out what she's going to order, I get out my
cash to see if I have enough. I have a lot of trouble counting it, but I finally figure out that I have 3 5s and a handful of 1s. I also manage to find my Brusters' punchcard.

When I look back up, I realize my wife only ordered a small cup full of chopped nuts and is busy covering the nuts with chocolate syrup from the complementary syrup pump near the register. When I express my confusion, she says she wanted to save money by getting a topping to spruce up the ice cream we had at home. As we're leaving the restaurant, we run into the cashier, now wearing a jacket and heading the other way. It looks like we were her last customers for her shift.

Now we're outside the restaurant, walking on a sidewalk to the parking lot. I'm in the rear, making sure the kids all stay
with us. There are a lot of people out here and it's hard to keep them all in sight.


The Robinsons' house
I'm watching a live-action Meet The Robinsons (never seen it). They're moving into a large rental house. This is their first time seeing the house, so they're touring it. I'm watching Mr Robinson as he explores the finished basement, which is pretty much one huge rec area. Everything is painted white. With the stairs a ways behind him, he opens a door on his right. Looking through it, we can see a sitting area with the garage past it. I'm confused: we're in the basement, so how is there a garage? I don't think any more about it.

Now I'm there with a friend of mine. Turning back towards the stairs, we see a gigantic TV mounted on the wall, near the ceiling. It's turned on, showing something I can't remember. One of us notices a projector on the ceiling, and we Ooo and Ahhh and turn it on. It's actually very disappointing: the picture it projects isn't any larger than the TV, it's dimmer, and it's actually badly calibrated so that the picture is crooked and overlaps the TV.

The son is being pampered by a group of girls. His sister is hanging up-side-down from a hole in the
ceiling, watching him. He sees her; she gets embarassed and hits a button on her harness, reeling her back up into the ceiling, back to her bed, which is half out over a hole in the floor that's a good 10 feet long and runs the width of the room. There are a couple of other beds, also half over the hole.

Now the father is standing on the other side of the hole, away from the beds. He has a good friend with him, a black man. The father tells his friend that the friend's favorite show (some kind of home improvement show) is coming on soon, and that he needs to talk to his daughter - it's her birthday.

Now I'm watching another son. He and another boy are up on a second story platform. They're wearing headgear like what Stark wears in Iron Man 3. They're going to be boxing, but they won't be physically doing anything. Instead, down below, a couple of other boys (also wearing headgear) are going to be doing the boxing, controlled by the boys up above. But, to ensure no one gets hurt, they won't actually touch each other: instead, the pain will be simulated by the headgear. An adult is with them to make sure that there are no accidents.



Wizards' Tower
This dream is something about a group of wizards in a large tower. Some of them are in a very tall round room. They're on the floor; a couple of stories up, a bridge crosses the room, and enemy wizards standing on the bridge are slinging spells down at them.

Today i had a vague lucid dream. I became lucid, don't really remember how, didn't reality check which is odd, i think maybe a DC told me i was dreaming or i was like "This doesn't look right" from my conscious. Looked at my hands alot even checked to see if i could breathe with my nose being held (I could breathe, or what felt as breathing). I did this to stay in the dream, asked DC things like "What should i do next?", They felt surprisingly nice and talked now and again (I think). I was stuck on what things to do, i was afraid if i did something wrong i'd wake up. I believe i might have had s*x again in this one with one of the DC's (Seems to happen all the time now). Even the feeling of having such control seems to be enough for me.

Date: 28 Sept

WBTB: Gingko

LD: I walk towards a tram station, few classmates are here as well. I am looking for some items, there seems to be an open air store with products piled all around. I think about my plans to ld. Mom is also here. As I look straight ahead, I realize that I am already dreaming. I remember my goal AF and quickly head in an unknown direction, but then remind myself to stop rushing and take some time to look around.

It is early in the evening and there is a full moon, normal size. As I pass the corner, thinking about AF a fountain structure appears, it has something Greek/classical to it, I think "Poseidon"? There are some statues (don't pay attention of what) and water is randomly sprinkling from them. I want to build AF here and now, using whatever water material is available, so I go closer to the structure. I am wearing sport pants that are sliding down my feet, making it hard to move. I wonder if I should take them off, but remember this is a bad idea and do my best to make them disappear by ignoring them, then continue moving forward without problems. The nearby fountain has a small section with very attractive water and ice surrounding it. I have the strong desire to get in the ice cold water and enjoy the feel of it. It's an amazing feeling but the dream fades and I wake up.

Mini-ld: I appear in a store and recognize this is a dream. I shortly stare at some prices and erase the ink with my hand. There are tons of winter clothes on me and I feel very uncomfortable. Of course, I start taking them off until I am wearing a T-shirt and feel much better.

I go out and notice a guy sitting in this street cafe. The dream starts to destabilize, so I join him and tell him I need his help with stabilization. I hold his small child-like hands and examine them. I quickly think of AF and look at a nearby building and there is building waterfall (i.e. water falling from the building instead of rocks). That looks reassuring and I want to go there, but the dream fades.

I wake up, somewhat later and without much involvement on my part I DEILD to the same dream.

Mini-deild: I am looking at the face of the same DC and wonder about the whole dream resuming like this. I caress his face and kiss him on the cheeks as a stabilization tech, but the dream doesn't last long and I wake up.

Friday, 10/4/13

Last night, bed around 12:30 -1am - 9:45am

Morning full of dreams.

DR 1 - I think I had a dream with OpheliaBlue's cat Sophie. She was fluffy and very light beige mixed with white. But first she was a bunny. There was another bunny as well. I was feeding them greens from my bag. I was pulling out all kinds of grasses and flowers and vegetables I knew bunnies like.

I'm pulling out weeds from my bag and there were some that I was not sure if not poisonous, so I put those back and I'm wondering why the heck are they there. There is nightshade I recognize by it's small black berries. And another poisonous plant. Then I pull out this huge, gorgeous white flower, like a daisy. 4-5 inches in diameter, so symetric, not a single flaw on it. I gave it to the bunnies/cats. They loved it. Then I fed them some fresh corn husk and corn silk and they were loving it. They dragged it out all over the place.

DR 2 - I'm with my auntie and she is telling me, she is getting a job. There was more talk going on. The job will be downtown in store with textile. I'm telling her, "great, I'll be driving you, because that's the way to my work". I guess this is because I'm thinking of getting a second job IWL.

DR 3 - this is the earliest I remember. Could have been around 7am.
It's very explicit and will stay in my paper DJ. Best sx dream ever.

Recalled one more dream from normal sleep

Brief false awakening in the bed and getting distracted.

Dream recall from today's naps, i need to fix my schedule again.

Dream 1(fragments):

I was in some place with a river, and (from what i feel) i was in dragon form and there was also another dragon.

Dream 2(fragment):

I was playing some forum game.

I love messed up dreams like this.

I remember seeing a scene where there was people doing psychedelics in a rest room. All they had to do was stand in a puddle outside of a cubical and that would give them the tripping sensation.

I was trying to smuggle drugs into a school for a group of people. I made my way through my home town, remembering walking up to at least the paint shop.

I reached the school and made my way to the toilets. I went inside the cubical and a guy was in there with me. He was explaining to me what was going to happen when it came to the drugs. He explained that we needed to have certain coloured poo in the toilet bowl, all from light to dark poo. I think I had already had a poo in the toilet earlier. I don't remember seeing other people have a poo in the toilet, but there was now 5 poo's. The guy was explaining to me about how we got the different coloured poo. He said something about being active in sports? I looked into the bowl and noticed that the 5 poo's mostly looked different, some not so different.

I think the door was open the whole time, and I bought out the drugs that were in my pocket, and placed it on top of the toilet, near the flush buttons. A guy that was involved with us, was standing outside the cubical, gave me a look of disbelief. He couldn't believe I would pull drugs out, so anyone who walked passed could see what we were doing (I think I recognised him, Ash R's mate?).
Someone must have alerted authorities about the drug use, and we were tipped off. I was told that we were probably going to be patted down as we left the building, so I put the drugs down near my ass. I could feel it there, and thought it may have been sticking out a bit.

As I was leaving with someone, we were confronted with doors. As I went through the door, it was a similar area to where I had just come from. It was as if we were in a maze and had to choose correctly to leave the area.
I remember a Chinese guy, he was quite tall and had the look of a mob boss. I think he may have been after the drugs?

I reached stairs, that were very steep. As I worked my way down them, I noticed police man on both sides. There was 3 police man on my side and I had a problem passing them. I think they were willing to let me passed.

Dream fragment:
I saw an Echidna laying on it's back. I could see it's stomach, as it was trying to get upright.

Echidna - I don't think I ever remember seeing an Echidna on it's back, but it was very similar to the second picture.

[Dream 1]
In a large building on the 5th or 6th floor. It room is quite large, and has multiple windows, but the room is still kind of dark. My siblings are there doing various things. But only one activity prominent in my mind. One of my sisters is upset about something involving pokemon cards.

I take her into the hall way to talk to her and find out whats wrong. She's standing beside a desk thats placed in the corner of the space. Somehow as i ask her what's wrong she disappears, and it takes me a moment to figure out she fell into a ventillation vent under the desk. I jump down and pull her out of there.

[Dream 2]
I'm at the house I lived at in highschool. There's a bunch of Spec Ops guys there and we're preping for a training evolution. I'm packing my bag, trying to figure out what I need to bring; before I leave i remember noting there's a dog in the back. Also noted a wolf, but don't remeber it.

[Dream 3]
I'm on a bus with Spec Ops guys and we are passing through a gate to some military base or military area. We start driving into the woods and I mention it looks familiar to a guy i know who's there as well. He says to look again. I look and see a metal shed thats rusted and abandoned next to the dirt road and I tell him that yeah, i remember being here now.

We get out and my group and I grab out bags and wander into the woods at night. We are suppose to evade capture. After not long we stop at a stream but then spot a bunch of running poeple and lights coming our way. The group starts scrambling away, but i run the opposite direction and shout to distract them. I get tazed but don't feel it, then tackled, and lead away. They bring me back to thier camp, explaining that we did very poorly. We get to and RV or Bus and I hang out there. Dream gets confusing then.

Dream recall from today's WBTB/naps. Yay for 200th lucid!

Dream 1(fragments):

I was piloting some mecha and there was battle with more mechas.

Dream 2:

I was playing spiral knights and was chatting to SilentEternity, apparenty there has been an update that completely reworked the ingame market and changed the place, auction house has been removed and bazaar closed off 'for repairs'. I've been moving character around checking things and haven overall looked rather damaged and old, then i was chatting with SilentEternity about it.

Dream 3(fragments):

There was some story about two draconic characters defeating enemy army or something.

Dream 4(fragment):

I was on some cliffside.

Dream 5:

I was at home and i was watching some videos, there was some fraxy video that mentioned some old bosses and someone was playing them, but they looked different. There was one boss which was attacking through 'ceiling' but player's attacks broke the script somehow and it was not working correctly.
Then i get up and think for a minute about those bosses and realize that it"s a dream. I almost immediately shift to quadruped stance and feel my wings, i fly and phase through ceiling and now i am outside, there's some weird loud noise like construction site or something and i start flying around. Then after a while dream fades out.

My love for lucid dreaming is strong as I cope with the loss of a friend, but I cannot stand seeing their home inside the dream and wanting to be able to do what I never did with them in person whenever I would walk her to school.

It's happening on this street I currently live in. It's not a long street, as a matter of fact, it could take me about 10 minutes to walk across it in reality. It isn't like that in dreams. In dreams, the time it takes to walk down across this street is determined by how many memories I have within it, I assume. My father is driving me down this street in this blue car. He is going to take me near the other side of this street. As he does, I notice a few elements on the way.

On our way down I saw one of my friends' home. Her name was Trinh. Me and Trinh lived on this same street(a little funny because she is the friend of the girl who I tried apologizing to for a year). Unlike her real home, which was a little bit trashy(okay, a lot trashy), this home is as clean as a rich, suburban home. But I'm still not convinced that this may be a dream.

As we're driving on to the next houses, I see Trinh's house again. This made me to believe that I am in fact in a dream. After that my father turned at a corner and that was basically it for this scene. My dream was beginning to fade when I kept on emphasizing to my mind that I AM in a lucid dream.

Dream recall from yesterday's WBTB/nap.

Dream 1(fragments):

I was watching video of some card game, prolly Hearthstone, and there was one dragon card that was really powerful, but not from IWL version of it.

Dream 2:

I was at home and i was checking bunch of books, there was one that had like questions and checkboxes, like character creation and among other things it has special section where there was selection of dragon that character would be after he dies. I got really interested in book but then i was suddenly in the bathroom and family started distracting me, i've had random thought about what's going on that almost got me lucid but dream ended.

Dream 3(fragments):

I was watching some anime and there was something about town in the skies and a dude who everyone was calling 'god'.(Definitely based on one episode of anime i was watching recently...)

I was at the local skate park in my home town. I was with a few people and we were building an extra ramp.We left the skate park not long after.

My local skate park.

I decided to come back with Kayley, and continue what we started off. I noticed a table top in front of me that was made out of timber. I think it was something we had worked on earlier.

I looked into the distance and saw a group of people, only to recognise a few of them. They were just standing there, looking at us. I waved them over I think.

Eventually the group of people made there way over to us. I was talking to Pete R about what was happening. He's friend Bryce Gibbs (AFL Player) had did a mono and accidentally bumped into Pete. Pete kind of gave him the look of WTF.

Pete Radivo (somewhat famous BMX rider) - Bryce Gibbs (Australian Rules Football Player)


I was going to start finishing off a few things on a ramp we were building earlier, but made sure I didn't leave anything around the skate park to be taken without me knowing. I noticed I had left a few tennis racquets under a chair?

I made my way towards, where the community centre was in real life, but it wasn't there in my dream. I walked up onto the platform leading to where we were building earlier. It was a long narrow hallway looking obstacle. I proceeded to walk to the end with Kayley. I was looking around to what I could do. I saw pieces of timber laying on top of the nailed down timber, so I was trying to move that out of the way before continuing.
I realised that I didn't really have the right sized nails to use to hammer into the timber, only a couple were the perfect size. I saw a scene of where I was looking at nail gun nails?

I saw a black man coming our way, he looked South African. I showed him what we were doing here.

Someone had pushed the wall at the far end down, as if they were doing what happened in the movie ''What Dreams May Come'', where Cuba Gooding. Jr had pushed the wall down, showing Robin Williams a new world (I had watched this movie last night for the first time).



I was looking around and noticed that we were building in between 2 house fences, which gave us about 5 metres in width to work with. I saw houses in the distance that I've never seen before.

I saw an old lady come over from next door. I started to feel a little bad, thinking I may be building on part of her property. She began to start mowing the lawn where we were building. She reached the area where there was a platform, and she tried lifting the lawn mower on top of it. I offered her a hand with lifting the lawn mower, as she was struggling a bit. She didn't want any help. I had a good look at her, and she had an unreal amount of muscle on her for a older women. I looked at her T-shirt she was wearing, it was white with 3 layers of photos on it, 1 under another. I knew the 3 people that were in the photos but only remember 2, which was Dwayne Johnson (The Rock) in 2 of the pics. DJ was inside a wrestling/boxing ring in both of his photos. 1 of his photos he had longer hair, compared to the other. I could now see a scene in my head of the picture, but it formed into a full blown moving scene. DJ was fighting Mixed Martial Arts against someone. He was doing very well at the start of the fight, getting some good shots in. The tide turned when his opponent gave him some punishing shot back. The strikes were pin point, one after another. DJ was all over the shop, he was on the verge of getting knocked out, but showed great heart to stay on his feet. The ref (Big John McCarthy, MMA Ref) had a look at DJ closely, and noticed that the lights were on but no one was home, and stopped the fight, he thought he had taken enough punishment and saved him any unnecessary shots.

Dwayne Johnson (The Rock Wrestler, Actor)

I heard someone mention that a mod or member from Dream Views had chosen to see a movie (Harry Potter) over an important meeting or something, regarding dream view staff. They had mentioned that he really wanted to do a certain thing in his next lucid dream, that happened in the movie. I could see a scene of what exactly he was intending to do. There was a cartoon looking character (similar to a character in angry birds), it was shooting itself out of a cloud into another cloud across the sky. It was continuing this process, from cloud to cloud. Someone said that this is where he stuffs up. The cartoon character was losing momentum and was on the decline.

Angry Bird

I had a brief moment when I was thinking about morphing myself into a character or a body part (something like that..) to surprise the people I was with.

I started to feel as if I was wasting my time with the building. Nothing was really getting done. I said to Kayley that we should just pack it up for the day. She looked at me with disbelief, which made me re-think about what I should do. I think I continued, until I woke up.

Side Notes: I tried to DEILD when my alarms would go off but I kept swallowing and focusing on it too often.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I'm at some airport, but not a conventional one, either it's interplanetary or interdimensional. I was with some girl friends, but I loose them in the crowd. I end up in the restauration area and from there I walk out into an open area that I recognize from another dream I had some day. There's a stage and a girl is rehearsing for a concert later on. I keep walking up a dirt road because nature looks alien: there's a tree with raspberries the size of big apples and the soil looks like a creamy chocolate cake. As I watch the trees, their roots and branches and the river to my left, I notice patterns overlapping. The branches of a certain tree fit precisely against certain stars in the sky.
A guy appears behind me and says "Can you see the patterns, repeated and interconnected?".
"Yes, but if I move to a new position, I stop seeing this overlapping pattern, so it's just coincidental."
"Look again, you'll just see new patterns emerging. No matter what angle you look at things, you will always find repeating and overlapping patterns, just different ones, infinite numbers."
As we keep walking, I know I am dreaming, but it requires no reality check to confirm it or stabilize it. It holds very naturally and very clear. I actually feel that I can stay there forever. I realize how much I could learn if I decide to stay. I am decided to stay and unravel all the secrets of all the universes.
But then I wonder what will happen to the girl body I have left sleeping on a bed... Will "I" enter a coma? Sleep for the rest of "my life"? What about my family and loved ones? I don't worry that I'll miss them, I worry that they'll suffer not understanding what is happening to "me". I feel obliged to come back. (Damn!)
But for now I keep walking with this guy and he takes me to a really nice hostel in the mountain. My room faces a terrace over the river, that connects to other rooms. All is well on this peaceful place, I'm just contemplating nature, when a couple of men in black come out of another room, dragging my friend. When I approach to ask what they're doing, they tell me to go away or they'll take me to. One of them has some kind of weapon that points at me and I wake up.

I'm just gonna get right to the point, I'm gonna spend some time catching up and putting everything from my notebook dream journal (written with pen) onto this online one. So, yeah. And also, some of this might scare you. I got used to it and for that I payed the price.

Part one (I call this one the God complex):
I don't know how I got here, but I'm in some kind of jungle. It's night time and there's some scary noises I can hear. I start running to find some kind of shelter. I can't find a good place so stop where I'll be safe, so I just keep running. Eventually, I hear something move close by. I turn around and see something rustle in the bushes. I keep running. Eventually, the becomes daytime. I'm still running. I'm getting a bit of an adrenaline rush. There's that fear factor I can feel in my gut also. Eventually, I slow down, but I'm still scared for my life. I start thinking about the dream itself and wondering if it's a dream at all. Then, I get to thinking if it'll ever end. If I'll ever see my friends or family again. About middleschool, and highschool, and if I'll ever get back. I think about my friends, and about the times I've spent with them. I start running faster. That fear factor is playing up again. After a little while, it's night time again. Time to look for the shelter that I'll never find. I don't know what it is, but I can feel something watching, like its been there the whole time. I start seeing pairs of red, glowing eyes watching me. No matter how fast I run, they're still there. After a while, it's day time again. And it all happens over, and over, and over, and over. As it goes I miss my friends more, and more, and more, and more, and more until it's a goddamned knife in my back, like its pulling me down. Some time later, I see something. Something big and bright. I walk closer and eventually I see a body of water, the sun reflecting off of it. Just below the horizon are some docks, next to what looks like an oil rig at the center of the body of water. My heart skips a beat, and I'm grateful there's a sig of people. A couple minutes later, I see a few of my friends. I run up and hug them, tell them how fucked up everything was, and they just say "Hey Ian how ya doing?". I know something's wrong, but I don't wanna believe it. All I wanna believe is that it'll all end. Anyways, they pull up their raft, we all climb on, and start moving out to the oil rig. Once we get there, I'm stunned. There's all of my friends, my family, everyone. People from school that I didn't even know that well. It's like a party. There's music, there's dancing. A couple of girls even gave me their phone number. I don't care. I'm just glad to see all of them. To know they're there with me. A little while later, the sun starts setting. I'm leaning on a railing, looking at the horizon where there isn't any land ahead (if you imagine it like a cove, where to the north is the docks and a small village, to the west and south is the jungle, and to the east is a long river that opens up to an ocean). I'm trying to absorb everything. Let it all sink in. But then I notice something. To the east, where the cove opens up to an ocean, the water starts swaying. Eventually, I see a huge wave (gigantic. unbelievably enormous. like it's the end of the world). I start shouting, trying to get everyone to run, but they tell me I'm crazy. They tell me to just relax. And then, once the wave is an eighth of a mile away, they start evacuating, telling every one to go into the hole (you know, like a submarine hole, like a shelter room). They start telling everyone to get in there. (and this is where the endgame hits. the climax. where i know theres no god and if there were, he'd be not a god, but Lucifer himself). I climb into the shelter room. Everything inside looks like the inside of a submarine (metal walls, floor, spinney-wheel kind of door). Theres a few other people there. My parents, the girl I love (who just thinks I might have a crush on her), my best friend, etc. Then it hits. People are still screaming "what do we do?!" when it does. The blast shuts the metal door, and I start crying. Because the people outside didn't make it. But the door gets blown open and we all get sucked out. Eventually, the water level drops back down I get up. There's still puddles of water everywhere. And the bodies, too. Bodies everywhere. My friends, family everyone. A couple people are still alive, but exactly when I get there and touch them, and let them know I'm there, their skin turns soft and pale, and their bodies turn to sand and water. The bodies all turn to sand and water. I find my mom and dad. They're still breathing. I start crying. I know they're gonna leave soon, but I don't want them to go. I reach over and hug them tight, to let them know I'll always love them. Then they melt. To sand and water. They all melt down, everyone. Only when I touch them. The girl I love, my best friend, and its ALL MY FAULT. Then I wake up. This is how I know there's no fucking god. No fucking person that has the slightest bit of good in them would ever make me go through that. If they would, they deserve to burn in hell, the get their insides torn out. Dream or not, that's my scar, and it drove me insane. And everytime I think about it, about what I went through I start crying. I just wish it never happens again as a dream, and that it never happens for real.

Date: 19 Sept

Pre bed: 200mg valerian

WBTB: 60 mg caffeine (RB)

Non-ld fragment: I am trying to take a shortcut at night in this familiar from previous dreams city. In one of the dark streets, I run into criminal DCs with very bad teeth. A number of young people sitting on a bench agree to defend me if necessary and I go sit there. I find one of the guys extremely beautiful. We talk for a while, but they are leaving soon. I notice that his whole body is covered with small, shiny clear droplets of water and stare in fascination.

In love: Very deep sleep and my recall is not very good.

We are moving in the dorms because it is much cheaper. There are six beds in the room and a guy who already lives here. I ask if only two of the beds, ours, are going to be used. He confirms.

The dream goes on for quite a while with all kinds of thoughts about clothes, bathroom etc. Then it looks like more people actually live here and we will be sharing the room, now apartment with them. Someone opens the door and lots of DCs come in, new roommates, I think. This girl asks me questions about the admin, I don't understand what she is saying.

Bf is gone and this guy comes and talks to me. I realize that this is a dream but my mind is kind of foggy. I remember having thoughts about me being in deep sleep and that this is good for stability. The guy leaves and another one appears, I like him very much and remark that he shows some persistent DC qualities. He comes and goes several times but looks the same, gray t-shirt, black hair, some eyeliner even, a bit like Mark Terenzi. He also gives me a kiss. We talk for some time but my memory is really bad. The dream starts to fade, I lose my sight but I can still hear him. I tell him to keep talking to me, I will hold on to the sound. I can feel my eyelids and am careful not to mess this up, but soon the image returns. He gives me another kiss. The dream slips away again and I struggle to bring it back. He is on the other side now but looking totally different and there is another guy dressed with the same clothes and holding a similar colorful object. The dream fades and I fall into oblivion.

Falling: I am walking down the stairs talking to this DC. It looks like I have forgotten my handbag, I turn back and see it at the top of the stairs. I make it fly directly to my hands. The DC remarks that I am not supposed to do this while abroad. I have this warp-like feeling and realize that I never woke up from the previous dream. The B6 woman is also here in the background and I wonder if I should go and talk to her, examine her energy, and ask why does she always behave like that. At the same time, I don't want to waste too much time with her and risk things getting out of hand, so decide to just ignore her.

I am looking at a large modern glass vase that they are selling in this now shop and try to move it with tk, but not much success. I also try with an elegant china tea cup but I feel that I don't really want to be breaking these things. Finally, I remember Angel Falls and follow the plan of "here and now". The main idea is to use the turn your back technique. I already hear water running just behind me (like a fountain in a mall). I am in some sort of not very well lit mall too. I take a few steps back, concentrating on changing the surroundings. I actually slip backwards a few steps, which feels kind of weird and not very effective, but the surrounds begin to change a bit. I decide to facilitate the process of getting rid of the old scene and into a new scene by falling backwards.

As I do this, it's as if something immaterial swallows me and I enter void weightlessness combined with motion. I shortly see lots of greenery in front of me that is very similar to rainforest vegetation, but it quickly vanishes. I am speeding backwards in the void with this weird feeling of traveling through space at high speed. For a second my mind is totally blank and I feel stressed, I try to remind myself to keep cool, be patient as it seems to be taking too long and shortly pretend I am meditating. Then I try to concentrate on one of my visualizations and build the scene as I had imagined it. During the entire time of the experience, I hear the sound of falling water. It is much harder to concentrate and visualize than I thought, but I succeed in having lots of water flowing on me in the darkness now. I try to prepare the scene again even though it's not the right place where I actually wanted to start from. I am still flying backwards through space, this thing doesn't stop even if I expect it to. I briefly see the top of a barren hill with a non-human castle in the negative mood of some game or a game related dream. I don't want to be there. The falling continues and I finally find myself in bed. I stay still for a while but nothing happens.

Comments: is it just me or is it really hard to concentrate on anything while in the void. I have noticed this another time as well. The moment everything disappears, my mind also goes totally black and if my mind is blank...then there will be nothing to project around me. Maybe I need to think about stuff, rather than struggle to visualize.

I walk out of the restaurant that I was eating in. I know that my girlfriend’s family was eating in there. I look to the left and see a huge tornado start forming. I it suddenly turns into a full blown tornado and starts heading straight for the restaurant. I think about it for a second, and then rush back up the stairs and into the restaurant. I am yelling about the tornado. I pick my girlfriend up and tell her to run. I grab my keys off the table and then pick the computer up and follow them out. We get outside and I try to get them to run perpendicular to the tornado. We start running left and then see that we are surrounded by four tornados….