Non-Lucid Dreams
I'm in the swimming hall and about to jump in with some friends. After I have jumped into the water Albin holds me down with his feet. I hear him clearly even though my head is under water. He says that he will soon let me up. I am pretty calm and trust him but I still think that what he does is wrong. I am released and swim some more. A new person tries to drown me but I recover. I walk up and try to find my glasses. I look around and think that I see them in a bag. I pick the glasses up but notice a difference. These glasses are strechable and have built in lamps in them. I put them back and keep on looking. I find a new pair of glasses that looks just like mine. After closer inspectation I notice that these ones have light iron frames with holes in them on the sides. I look some more and find more glasses that almost looks like mine but there is some kind of deviation. I can't find my glasses. I'm on a warm island and the sun is shining. There are two camps that fight each other and I'm on the left side. Most people have bow and arrows and shoot at the other side. I dodge some shots and try to advance. I am able to reach their beach and there is some cute girl present. I take care of some small birds in a cage on our back yard. New fragment. Our cat is sitting one the table and she is eating one of the birds! I am a bit chocked but think about how this is nature. I'm one the back yard again and reinforce the cage so that they will be more safe. I use two wooden planks to protect them but there is some dirt in the way. I inspect the birds and notice that they are very ugly. They have the body of a hen but with a duck's beak. I'm with a girl and we are about to leave two boys. The girl is angy with me and I try to show her that she doesn't need to be angry. I talk with her and say one of boy's names wrong which triggers her. I fix a ride with a buss and she understands that I am reliable. The bus is riding through a tunnel and suddenly a lot of good looking women appear on the sides like a movie scene. Rainbow colors are starting to appear and I understand that I am lucky.
With Mik, staying up til 6am in a dorm bed that is at the end of a subway platform, watching ghost shows. There is a lamp and rug and end table, as if the furniture from the room had been magically placed in a subway. He says we've watched eight episodes and I realize each episode is an hour and that it's already 6am, and we burst out laughing. He lets me grab all my blankets. I forget which are mine, and head up the short subway staircase with them trailing on the dirty floor--it's a weird juxtaposition. The stairs lead into a maze of hallways that are a cross between the Smith Hall back stairs and the tight upper hallways of WHS where I took my exam. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Walking from Treehouse towards H. Ave on a warm night, and campus is bustling. There's Wentworth bros racing each other in scooters that keep whizzing dangerously past me, but in this dream it feels like there's weights inside my legs and I can't jump out of the way. I reach the corner across the street from Target, and I'm with Joe and a bunch of his male friends. We hear a crunch SKRRT behind us and turn to see giant brown toenails rolling to a stop on the ground, with smoke rising from them. A bro went over the curb so hard that he shredded the toenails off his feet like a Looney Tunes character. The walk sign goes on and we cross the street towards Target. It has become a convention center and we walk up a short wide staircase into the main room as I start talking to him about the band Slint.
1st June 2021 Fragment: In a PvP battleground, themed on Kul Tiras or something, lots of wooden beams and structures, sort of grungy and moody atmosphere. Mechanically it's somewhat like Alterac Valley, except each side has to capture ten flags from the other side and the flags would spawn or drop from some players as far as I could see. It was a long and drawn out battleground, I remember seeing in the interface, at the top under the score, that we had been in it for twenty eight minutes or something. I was a female night elf huntress, having a dragon hawk or ravager for a pet. I fight some horde players a few times but I'm not especially strong and do very little damage, plus I'm usually outnumbered. I remember using the aspect of the cheetah to get away more than once; we can't use our mounts on this battleground, despite it's seemingly vast size. At one point I chase after a blood elf, a death knight maybe? The level bracket is weird, like from twenty to sixty. Near the end, me and someone else are partly disguised (as what?) and we confront this horde player who had been running away from me. (In the dream I was certain he was much stronger, but he had a flag and I still wanted to stop him) Then it's less like a battleground and more like a department store in a mall, I'm walking around with these two people and we're talking about gender. There's something about how straight women are feeling misrepresented by a porn study? I felt like it was a diverse and inclusive study based on what this woman who was walking with me was telling me. It felt to me like the women complaining were picky and/or spoiled straight women, probably white in my mind. Fragment: In the kitchen at the old home. It's night time and the ceiling fluorescent light is on. J and L are between the two pillars and they're talking. I'm leaning against the counter in front of the sink, mostly just listening, occasionally saying something. The table is open/extended. There's a fan heater pointed at my feet, pointing toward me, I feel the heat/warmth on my legs. I point it toward them instead and J thanks me. The plug is coming from under the table, but in reality I don't think there are any sockets there. Notes: - I feel as though there have been quite a few dreams about the old home or hometown lately. - Not sure what brought on the thing about the study at the end of the dream but last night I was watching something from the 80s that had a segment that seemed (to me) sexist against women. - I just remembered "ten flags" is an actual thing, when I typed the title for this.
Had a false awakening where I typed half of this already into my phone's notepad I'm walking in A at night, on a corner with brownstones and a warm, floursecent lit convenience store on the corner that lights up the street. I see anna and haley on my walk and go the other way pretending not to see them. But we cross paths again and I embrace it and we chat. Everyone seems very nonchalant, especially haley, as if it was no surprise to see me. Anna is loud and bubbly. She turns into melina as we reach a crosswalk, turns around from the front and laughs, and asks if we all live in allston. Haley says no. Haley talks about a place they were, and I see a sort of mini theatre/puppet show gypsy house that opens to a tiny cutesy wooden dock, along a line of docks that each belong to a business on this 'strip'. There are some slip'n'slides leading out of the building to the end of the dock. We say goodbye as I get out of an elevator and into the DS9 studio. I felt hurt by how nonchalant and unsurprised they were to see me after over a year, I wanted to shock them with how quickly and silently I left the conversation and make them feel bad. -------------------------------------------- I get to the first class of the day and everyone is cartoony, yet still with realistic hair. There's an activity where we hold our reflective flip phones up to people at other desks, and draw those reflections. The room is quiet and dim and subdued but in a cozy way, because it's too early for us to be rowdy. A pale girl with wire-frames and long blonde hair and a few marks for a face plops down next to me. There's a sort of black bow on her head, but it flutters off and I see it's a huge, thin, elegant black moth--each wing like a glass fan. It sits with the potted plants on the row of science-room windowsills. It's 6:00am, dewy, blue and silent and foggy outside. The fog carries to us the smell of flowers from under the dim blanket of morning. -------------------------------------- Dreamt that michael told me rent was now $150 LOL
31st May 2021 Fragment: I'm at a distorted version of the old home. The house is partly blended with a supermarket freezer aisle and a classroom, I think this is at the end of a dream segment that took place in a supermarket-like location. I'm nude in the bathroom and washing my hands. From a long distance away, I see JC (through a mirror?) jeering at me, saying I spend a lot of time washing my hands but that I still manage to do it so poorly. I find this comment hurtful because R (the tall one with the short curly hair) is next to me and agreeing with JC. I dry my hands, kind of poorly because of the towel, not taking away all the moisture. I leave the bathroom and I'm in the corridor, it's more like the rest of how the house should be now. There's something about ice creams, some Magnums. There are two on the floor of the corridor against a skirting board, seems like someone is keeping them here to save them for later. I think about how they won't keep very well here. On closer look they're not wrapped anymore, and their outer chocolate shells are cracked. I try and fiddle but only make it worse. I leave them be and go to my room, which would actually be L's room. Fragment: (earlier dream) I'm in my home town, like I've just returned after years. It's night time and I just left the house for some reason (emotional?) and I walk down to the shopping centre area. The path is more direct than it would be in waking life, the road goes right through where the parish church should be. At the front of the shopping centre, it's really well lit but mostly by phosphor street lights. I see some groups of people just idling about, chatting. A lot of them, I notice are people I knew from school, though some of them are black kids that used to make fun of me (M, R, are ones I remember). Unusually, I feel apprehensive over this, I think because there's so many people but I walk past them without being bothered, though I think people stare at me? This is the bit right in front of the bank, between the small substation building, said building is replaced in the dream by a ramp going underground (coming from the main road, the roundabout?). I turn left since it's the corner. This bit that should be road and car parking spots is all limestone cobbled path. I see MM and I walk past I say hello and wave at him, almost in his face, but he doesn't hear or see me, doesn't acknowledge me. He's coming out through some glass sliding doors. I don't look inside but there's a bright cool light in there. Makes me think or feel of an airport. I keep walking towards the open end of that underground ramp. Now I see D. I say hello to him too and he greets me back, we start talking. I ask him if he saw MM over there and he did, commenting something about him. We go down into the ramp, there's a sort of seamless transition and we're in a subway station. It's vast, more than almost any I can recall in waking life but it is like others I've dreamed of. It is well lit and there is a lot of concrete and some metal accents. There's a fair amount of people around? I get the impression it's quite late but I don't know or see the time at any point. I talk with D all the way as we walk, but sadly I can't recall what about. Notes: - I dreamed of D only recently. In the past when I've dreamed of him or the other D, it has usually been linked with personal relationship in some sense. Both D and MM were two of my only true childhood friends, but at the same time, I ended up eventually feeling abandoned and disconnected from both too. Besides from relationships and from family, I don't think I ever felt friendship like theirs again, at least so far anyway, though at several points I have hoped that people I have met would become friends like they had been. - In the dream it was as though MM was seeing past me, like he was aware of my presence but not acknowledging me. I remember he was standing still as I walked past whilst greeting him, expecting he would say something, at which point I would have stopped. - The point at which I felt apprehensive about continuing on past the groups in front of the shopping centre was mostly a form of social anxiety that I haven't really had too much of in my adult life. On some level, I was afraid of being mocked. The other dream fragment also relates to some aspect of this. - For the past few nights I keep trying to think about dreaming, lucidity and even previous dreams, but my mind always ends up drifting off and before I know it, it's morning. But I manage to recall most of my thoughts and moments prior to falling asleep fairly well.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP At my paternal grandparents house, staying with my mom and two guests, one is a fat kid on a diet but who can't resist eating and the other is Jeffrey Dahmer supposedly rehabilitated. I am preparing to go to sleep, and I go around the house checking if all is locked down. Wanna tell mom to lock her room and want to tell her who Jeff his but I am afraid she will panic. Walking on the street with Hachi on my side, no leash. Then I spot a dude on a street above us with a german shepperd and I grab Hachi by his neck and look around for something I can use as a leash, because he ain't happy with the other dog's presence.
Another dream on the verge of being lucid without quite being there. In the earliest part I can remember clearly, I’m on a computer: I’m looking up some band I’m interested in, trying to find more of their music. But the dream shifts to another scenario. It still isn’t lucid, but it’s pretty clear I’m not actually invested in it as real. I’m initially in an outdoor farm-like area with flamingos some distance away, observing interactions between characters. I only identify with one when she’s asked a question, changing to her viewpoint and responding as her. There’s a sense of making things up as I go along. I need to go somewhere now, and so I call to the nearby leopard, which I call Arthur, telling him to come with me. (I use the German pronunciation. I am about 90% sure I decided to name it after Schopenhauer.) It doesn’t want to get up, but I pull it to its feet, which it tolerates, and we walk away. Next, I remember entering a building. It’s somewhat reminiscent of a building on a campsite, just a long rectangle, possibly something like an uninsulated metal frame, and has no interior divisions. It’s mostly empty and white, and there’s an even stronger sense of almost-lucidity here. It’s as if whatever plot there may have been has definitely gone off the rails by now, and I’m driving things, though not in a fully conscious way. I go over to the bed in the nearest corner – other than the one by the door I entered from – and sit down on it. What follows is maybe best described as a strange kind of visual thinking – a little like reading a picture book, where I cease to really be present in the room and am absorbed in the stories that are playing out in mental space. It’s hard to describe since it isn’t exactly like anything that happens while awake – but it’s almost like there’s another presence there telling the stories. They seem to be some kind of philosophical parable, and also a sort of story-behind-stories, representing something that was once commonly manifested in literature from an earlier time. The first one was so utterly bizarre that I can’t remember a thing about it now – but in the dream, I understand it perfectly since the meaning in all its facets and interrelations is just a part of it as it is presented. I can see it all mapped out, like a complex constellation. But some of the points are placed in the wrong locations for it to reflect reality. It’s something I was already aware of, but it’s a little sad to see it laid out like this so clearly. There’s enough of a gap for the room to enter my awareness again before the second story begins. This one is apparently communicating the same thing as the first one did, but in a different way. I can remember the beginning of this one – how the wolves were all howling at the moon, but the moon had fallen asleep and couldn’t hear them… 5.30.21
30th May 2021 Fragment: In my bedroom at the old home. It's daytime, maybe early morning, based on the shadows and it's sunny based on the bounced light. I'm looking outside as if from the edge of the balcony but I think I'm actually not on the balcony. I'm talking to someone, maybe dad. I see a big sea turtle (an adult could probably sit comfortably on its shell) crawling towards our building on the cul-de-sac road below. I think to myself about how this happens from time to time. Notes: - I barely managed to recall this and only because of some random association, though not sure what that was anymore. - My dream self believed this type of sighting to be completely normal, hence the thought I had to myself in the dream. - Of my conscious recall between the ages of three and five (?) we had a relatively small pet turtle, living in some vivarium in what was the living room and which later became my bedroom. Oddly, I feel some sort of emotion writing about it, but I hardly remember any interaction with that pet turtle and I don't even remember how or if it passed away. I don't recall ever touching it.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP Some dream in which I was lucid but passively reacting and at some point I turn to my DCs and ask what should I do with my lucidity and because we are near some rail tracks and trains, someone suggests making a train fly. I find it interesting as I never did any such thing so I make a train fly, but it goes horribly wrong and crashes some 100 mt ahead. There is a fire and victims and the blame goes all to the poor train conductor. So then I and my DC friends try to help the conductor escape the scene and avoid a public lynching. We decide to hide her in a wooden box that is on the ground near some construction materials and take her away inside it. But the box is incomplete so I use my powers to duplicate the wood panels and finish the box. As I do it, I am surprised by how perfectly I can clone wooden planks and other materials but failed keeping the train flying. I am at some foreign country with my dog Hachi. I need to take a train and have no clue if dogs are allowed on the train so I take my chances. Then mid travel I see the ticket inspector coming and remember I forgot to buy a ticket to myself. As I go through a slight panic, some nice eastern European dude seems to want to help me by holding Hachi's leash, while I look for my purse for money, to try to pay my ticket now. The trains stops at some station and the inspector is gone, so I am relieved, but turn around and so is Hachi. I look for the guy and see him near the door, but he is not holding Hachi anymore. I go after him yelling and he points to a lady sitting some rows behind me and says she has the dog. Then he leaves. I run to the lady, but she is holding some puppy, not Hachi. I tell her he is not my dog and she says something like "so what? keep the puppy". I am mad and panicky because the guys who kidnapped Hachi got out of the train, which started moving again and I feel like I might never see him again.
comment dream lucid Thinking a lot about dreaming before falling asleep. Ramp Driving a motorbike off a ramp, jumping into the air. It was supposed to test something, maybe how someone got killed. Beaches all around and low tide. Walk with V With V in the forest, talking about how often I go out. I told him I help my family walking their dog. Hair I was talking with someone about which hairstyle I would like. False lucid I was walking down a path, playing some game. I think I did it for a second time and in an opposite direction, but that was just a vague memory. The rules were that you had to be lucid and do various tasks. There was a corner of a rock where the path led along a narrow ledge and I met a boy and a girl there. I offered the girl if she wanted to sit with me for a while and we crawled into this grassy alcove, letting the boy pass. I asked her what her name was and she told me her name. I told her I was Indigo. I asked how it was going so far and she said good, but she actually wanted to go so she wouldn't waste her time. So we said goodbye. It occurred to me that I've been lucid for a long time, that I've never had a LD this long, like 2 hours. But good for me - long LD = better chance of winning for me, while others have to do it in parts. I checked the paper with the tasks and it said to rubb our hands, so I did it, even though I thought I didn't need to, but I saw the organizer in front of me, so I wanted to get points. Then I saw more organizers around the corner and there was a fridge and I climbed on it and rearranged some food. I suddenly knew they were evil and decided to confront them - I told them I knew who they were and that they were serving the dark lord. They had a gun. I said they could kill me, but I had a plan to escape by waking up I closed my eyes and opened them and nothing, I was still there. That surprised me. I tried again and failed again. I remembered the reddit poll "can you wake up from a LD" and my answer "yes, reliably". That's what I get for that. I tried blinking really fast again, but it didn't work. Then I was in this labyrinth of big metal cabinets. I felt like I'd been lucid for an awfully long time, hours. I asked the organizers what they had done to my body in reality, that I was still asleep. They grinned, which worried me. Maybe I'm in a coma or something. But maybe not, and I have to wake up sometime. I figured there was probably a purpose for me there, something I needed to do. Somehow save everything and defeat them. I had this stick in my hand with some roots on the end. I've been poking around under the cupboards with it, seeing if there's some object that will allow me to save everything. I must have a reason to have that stick for... I felt myself waking up, and I thought "finally". I knew instantly that I was waking up from a false lucid. I logged keywords for the dream because I really liked it and wanted to remember. I felt confident that there could be a LD after this. I reiterated the intention to lucid dream. It took me some time to fall asleep again. Train to Birmingham I was at the station and it was about trains. Z said there was a train leaving for Birmingham and she was going to take it. I said that the train to Birmingham was useless to me, that we usually go via Manchester, and she was surprised. I walked with her on the way to the trains and there was the time and the Birmingham sign by the steps to the platform and it was flashing as if the train was about to leave. I hesitated for a moment but let it go, it wouldn't do me any good. I went back to the main concourse to look at the departures board to see what else was coming. The board was just changing. That's all I remember - the next was probably the transition into the false awakening. Real lucid - Meeting my dream guide I woke up in our bedroom and immediately suspected it was a FA. But as soon as I realized it, my vision got worse and I could only see two blurs. I was afraid I was going to wake up, but I knew I was still in a dream. It occurred to me to start picturing a deck chair and a beach or something, as what people do when they have sleep paralysis. Suddenly something disturbed me and I opened my eyes and I was awake and it was still a FA. Yes! I sat on the bed and R was awake next to me and there was also J. I knew I could ignore them, but I wanted to make them disappear with a snap of my fingers like in the daydream rehearsal, so I tried, but it didn't work, which I guess amused them a little. I started looking at what was the same in the room and what was different. Almost everything looked the same to me. There were these shelves and these pictures. I noticed that the frames of the pictures were a different color than they were IRL (actually, almost everything was different and we had no pictures or shelves IRL). There was also a wall cabinet with a brown fabric curtain and I had the feeling that something green was peeking out - an iguana. I went to look, but my cat came out. Goals! Verbal commands and then meeting my dream guide. I try "Clarity now!" but the dream already has great clarity, so what can improve? On the contrary, it gets slightly worse. But only for a moment. I leave the room and try "Increase lucidity", but nothing noticeable happens. I see a green jacket on the rack and I try to make it disappear. Might be easier than with humans. But nothing. I try again and the whole hallway to the living room disappears in a blur. I use the door to the second bedroom and walk into a large room that looks like a gym. There are mats, exercise equipment, and large windows facing the city street. I try to do a somersault on the mat, but I stop halfway through and just roll. The movement feels realistic. Goals! I walk across the room and shout "Dream, dream, give me my dream guide". I turn around and there's a curtain to the left of the windows (probably a mini room with more equipment) and my guide comes out from behind the curtain. She's a black woman, in her fifties, maybe early sixties (probably not, her hair is still dark brown/black and not grey), curvy but not obese, with big boobs. I met her once before in a daydream and she was an old white woman but I know it’s her. I said, "You've been here the whole time." She nods. We go and sit down on the leather upholstered couch that's appeared there for us. I said I didn't know how much time we had, or maybe she asked, either way, I knew she wanted and needed to know. I replied, "I'm not going to lie to you. I didn't come straight here. But I tried not to linger too long."She nods. I asked: "Will you teach me something?" She smiled. I started to wake up. Maybe she wanted to teach me DEILD? But more likely I was too excited
I was at a bigger version of the Longwood T stop, and it was bright and sunny out. I saw a 90-year old man standing across on the opposite platform with a baby in a rocker seat, by his foot. He looked like he used to be a professor but can hardly stand and looked like he should be in a nursing home, not taking care of a baby. Its rocker seat was very close to the edge of the tracks. I yelled, or did something that somehow pushed the seat away from the edge. But it rolled back on its axis and fell onto the tracks, and no one seemed to notice for a moment, not even the man. The train pulled over the crest of the hill silently and without warning, and a few men moved to jump onto the tracks but the baby got run over and we heard the crunching of plastic and metal. We all had to board a bus--the old man got onboard without any punishments and got the stink eye from everyone but that seemed to be it? ..... The dream evolved into me taking the bus up to a town at the end of a peninsula, maybe H. Dad told me I was only supposed to be here to pick up something. The sky is rumbling and gray and for some reason hurts my eyes to look at, as I ride past a lodging place. I get to the tip of town and see mini cafes, and warehouses and shallow, rocky blocks of beach. I stay the night, and I'm running freely down a long path with the ocean below on my left, and a dark strip of park to my right lit up by streetlamps. I almost run off the edge of the path, which stops suddenly and drops 3 stories into a basketball court carved as a square block into the big hill. I clutch my chest and inch down the hill on the side. I reach a kind of bench rest area as the bay on my left begins to open into a beach, and I can hear the ocean but it's a black void. There's some teenagers a few years younger than me that am still intimidated by. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Dad and I move to H, and there is a long window facing the length of the sun-baked driveway. Shady looking people are selling hard drugs there, and we need to close the blinds so they don't think we are going to snitch on them. Dad is laying back in a chair, and I have to repeat this to him slowly, like he is senile. His mouth is falling open. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ With Una, abroad in Germany outside a cloudy brick subway station carved out of the ground like in Harvard square, but it's shaped like a WWI trench. They are going to build a house for their family to live in. They recommend to our friend that she pull up her jeans to show off her knee high red boots.
Talking about my health It's night, and I'm laying in bed. Someone whom I don't remember is laying in a bed somewhere in the room. We're sending each other messages in the form of newspapers we write with magic, possibly with a wand. We tell each other about our health, apparently. Towards the end he says something along the lines of "You shouldn't complain so much" and that makes me mad, so I just go to sleep, possibly after a remark from my side. - I transiently wake up, and, after a minute, I go back to sleep. - Harry Potter-ish lucid I am around the street where I live. I see teenagers, behaving somewhat like Ron and Hermione, and I go to them. Suddenly we're in a sort of organization, and we walk behind a house, where we're hidden, and we practice magical spells. I say that I'd especially like to practice forbidden spells (I seem to refer to forbidden in Hogwarts), which the characters behaving like Ron and Hermione seem to like. Small scene change, I'm now walking away from that practice area with the characters I'll just call Ron and Hermione now, for convenience. I spontaneously become lucid. I think for a moment of what to do, and I decide to grow dragon wings since I've always wanted to experience flight. I tell them to watch what I can do, and I try to grow the wings, focusing. But it doesn't work, so I just remark: "Hm, doesn't work..." Scene change. Semi-lucid now. We're in a classroom, apparently in Hogwarts. There's an old, grumpy-looking woman who's the teacher. I'm sitting next to Ron. He says we're getting tests now, and as he says that, the teacher puts a piece of paper on each of our sides of the desk. Still semi-lucid, I decide to do the test. When she gave everyone a test, she says we should start, and I take out a pen. Now lucidity is gone. I talk for a while with Ron, not noticing I should work on the test. As the teacher walks by, I quickly take my test and try to look as if I'm working, and the teacher seems to simply ignore the fact that my test is empty, despite having had 5 minutes of time to work on it. I try to work on the first task, which is to rearrange a given set of letters magically into a specified sentence. I try to think really hard and see if I can remember the spell, but I don't, so I reluctantly put my hand up to ask the teacher. She comes over to me, and I tell her I don't remember the spell. She simply says that one surely wouldn't need more than a pen to finish this test, in a sort of humiliating way. I don't really care that she tried to humiliate me, but more about the fact that it seems pretty incompetent that she doesn't even know her own test. So, I just look around the class, and I spot a boy constantly farting, and the boy behind him clearly not enjoying that, putting his head down on his desk in anguish. That second dream was nice, just a spontaneous DILD. Just annoying my dream control didn't work, and that I forgot about stabilization and increasing lucidity. The farting boy clearly represented my totally mature classmates in real life, although the boy was a bit closer to the age where one would usually be expected to do something as immature as that.
28th May 2021 Fragment: Outside, night time. There's someone else with me. We're on top of a short building, flat roof. There's a curving road that comes down on a hillside and then back up a bit further along. Relative to me, this is to a 90 degree quadrant in my front-right. 29th May 2021 Fragment: Long dream, there's a hill and a big manor or castle on top? Some interaction with other dream characters. Something about walking a path, something about nature. Get the feeling of dawn or morning. Notes: - I'm having trouble recalling dreams despite clearly remembering being in them. Dream recall just seems to have completely faded by the time I'm sort of aware of being awake. My first thoughts on waking are fairly random and not seemingly related to my dreams. - I also have little or no recall of my alarms going off earlier in the morning. I wonder if the issue here is the same as what has made me feel unable to see things in/with my imagination of late, a somewhat frustrating problem. - It occurs to me that H's alarm has been different for a while; I used to think it was particularly annoying before, perhaps it was raising my awareness because of being annoying.
I dreamt Alice made a giant beautiful watercolor piece on huge paper and I had to bring it from the classroom up to her DS9 desk. I clumsily pick it up on front of the entire classroom and can barely get it out of the room without bending creases in it and walking into walls. I'm super ashamed and embarrassed but I don't know if people are noticing because I'm purposely not looking at them. I make it up to her desk and Victoria is there, and we have a good conversation. She asks me about how my five years of probation is going (!?) and I say fine, and begin loudly telling her that it was bullshit and I was caught being a middleman but there are some school officers and faculty walking by the aisle of desks and I can see them giving me suspicious looks, so I stop unnaturally in the middle of my sentence and talk about something else. I don't think Victoria sees the officers so she probably thinks I am out of it. I look at Alice's drawing and notice a huge tear at the bottom and creases in multiple other places. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm walking down the sidewalk by Evan's way, the one parallel to the fens. It's a warm, cloudy, blustery afternoon that is about to break into a thunderstorm and the sky is darkening. John and Irena are walking ahead, and a giant human-sized palm leaf gets caught on one of the small trees to our left. I'm walking that direction anyway, and Irena grabs it and hoops it around my head jokingly, like a mother. I grab each end and dance with it, and use it as a sail to carry me down the dirt path. Irena laughs to John as I get dragged further away and they wave goodbye. There's a group of practicing BU cheerleaders dressed in shimmery gold, forming a pyramid under one of the big shady trees. As I blow by I do pull the leaf under my legs and do some cool somersaults. I turn into Daria H. and Irena mentions how multitalented I am as I continue somersaulting across the street towards the Gardner museum, but remember to stop as a truck chugs slowly out from behind a car. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm on a balcony at Target, overlooking the long escalator crowded with people. I see a glimpse of Mrs. Bello and Joaquin, and I rush to the ground floor and see they're carrying home a newly purchased TV! This isn't the first time I've run into them at Target, and we catch up. And then I'm at their house--it's one of the large, simple ones from the colonial era made from blank, mossy dark wood and with no embellishments. The roof is giant and dominates the house's silhouette--on the right side its slope continues downward, to the ground. And the house is under a thick blanket of damp-smelling autumn trees, at the very back of an empty, grassy lot. It looks like it was plopped there in the Sims. I approach the ramp and see under it, see that the inside of the house is shelled out and charred black, so it looks like an empty dollhouse. The sound of a slow car rolls into the street behind me, with a woman in the passenger seat. My vision is a little blurry, but from way here in the back of the lot it looks like she has the white eyes of a lizard--I know because she's leaning far out of the passenger seat, staring at me with her head following me mechanically like a pivot as the car moves. I chase after her yellow car on my bike, fiercely curious, until the car disappears into an alley. That curiosity turns into fear as the car begins chasing me, and begins an action sequence of me whipping around tight corners and fences. I eventually reach the bottom of a highway overpass that reminds me of the one in springfield. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------- (fragments I jotted half asleep and don't remember well enough to write out in full) Elliot Smith Bled white city ending credits overtaken by animated characters like before The flowers pouring out of the plane represent their loved ones let them be Visit dark sea st weymouth studio daylight under cheap blinds find clothes rushing scary feel presence end on summer train platform Last minute bart simpson seaside diner at night, me and drug addict have to watch babies finish some task tonight and it is very high stakes, takes place in sims 3 sunset valley beach
There was a sudden apartment move where I was kicked out (cant even remember why). I moved to a big, depressing beige room with stained carpet and a TV and a sofa pushed up against the wall where I'm pretty sure I slept. It's in a trashy high rise somewhere like east Boston, with warehouses and docks and dense housing and the brown Charles river. I discover a weird staircase in the kitchen, curving around toward the ceiling. It's small and begins above the counter--like it was made for mice--and I have to crawl up it on all fours. I look up and see that there's no ceiling here. It's under a sort of overpass in Fenway park, the big green metal scaffolding structures that hang over the parts of the stadium and cast everything in dark shade. It's so close it almost dips into the room. I reach the top of the tiny staircase to peer over the apartment's wall, and there is a small metal 'balcony' around the perimeter--so close to this 'overpass' I can't stand up fully. When I peer down there's a narrow shaded street with a gift shop where tourists flock. The gift shop also reaches up to the overpass, so the street feels like a tall, shady tunnel where the sunlight and traffic sounds flood in from both open sides. Instead of having a railing this 'balcony' has weird pointless windows a couple feet high, not high enough to touch the overpass, and balancing on the edge. I could just step over them if I wanted to, but of course they're substitutes for railings so I'd plummet to my death. They're caked with dust and can be cranked open with an old-school handle. When I look forward through the gaps of this huge green ceiling, I can hear the roar of the baseball game and see a sliver of the crowd and green field. I can almost make out the scoreboard. I get paranoid for some reason, and feel like the tourists below can see me up in the scaffolding, peeking over the ceiling of my apartment at them. My phone buzzes with a message and in my paranoia I duck down--what if it's from some serial killer across the way who sees me? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I see a courtyard. I went to antonio bates' b-day party here as a kid, and there had been a weird building this was it!! With its mini inner courtyard and cheap pools It was tall mini water park under a stormy sky with cold slides and hanging playground bridges I see it from above cold wet aqua ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Woke up in uncle Jimmy's basement and immediately knew it was a dream, but was shocked by how clear it all was. I got up and slowly looked around and soaked in every detail. Beautiful late morning sunlight shone into every part of the basement, more than physically possible. I think I tried laying on the bed and feeling weight, and closing my eyes to see if they'd reopen to Boston. And somehow I knew where I was really sleeping and could envision my real room, which normally doesn't happen. Every part of the basement felt real until I got to James' room, and saw that there was a flight of quaint wooden stairs going down into a cluttered sub-basement, with complex embroidered railings and rugs. I wanted the dream to stay stable, so I went upstairs instead. Dad was in the kitchen upstairs making some breakfast. I must not have been lucid anymore, or else I'd have burst into tears. A serious construction friend was there, and a girl sitting over where the TV would be. I lean across and ask her her her name that I have forgotten before. She was friends with another girl, a supposed member of my family, that died recently. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I have to get to the food pantry across the dark city--Raph and Nell are there. I'm with some old man in his red bathroom as he tells me something important for my journey. His apartment is small and warm and has a cheap round wooden dining room table pressed against a window, one that faces Evan's way except it is a long stretch of pitch, pitch blackness. Something happens because there are predators out there in the alleys and sewers. The park is an acre-wide flat empty square of grass, surrounded on four far sides by these buildings. They are the only light source--the edges of the park are visible but it's too huge for their light to reach the center and it is a gradual pit of darkness. I believe they get me when they see me in the middle of the open space and rush towards me from the alleys looking in. I have to try multiple times. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ On the green line in the same dark city except a class is happening with all the adults and teenagers and strangers on the train and they're going around, having people recite something in response to certain questions. I'm not sure what's going on and am listening close over the roar of the train, trying to figure it out before I am called on. Bowlingotter is there, Lissy over in front of me to my right, Matty above on the seats one staircase up behind me. I smile at her laughing and I wonder if he knows I have a tiny crush on her. The train is warm and the windows are black leaving only our reflections and tiny colorful lightspots from the traffic outside. I feel nice surrounded by all these people. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ At the Weymouth house I enter the kitchen and the dining table is in the center, and aunt carol and a random girl are sitting there. It seems like an early spring day--the back door is open and cold white overcast light pours in. I am trying to dispose of a bag I have and aunt carol is being very finicky about it, going to get a separate bag to put it in and asking me to rip it up first. I go to my room and am trying to figure something out about joining Suzanne's zoom class on my phone, which had begun on the train. I wander around and look out the windows at an empty smart food bag tumbling through the yard and, and it's dim blue inside because no lights are on and the house seems cold and quiet and empty and it gives me a weight in my stomach.
Updated 05-28-2021 at 02:06 AM by 88961
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