I remember being at school and loudly criticizing the new plans for the curriculum amd the way they were gonna start doing things in class. The principal said the old ways were unsustainable. After that, me and Aaron were stopping by a gender clinic before heading to his place. I went in and an old lady asked me questions about the effects of Testosterone. I gave a similar response to what I would give irl. I later come to learn that the kid getting the hormones is named Cloud and he already passes as male quite well. He had messy straight black hair and a blue graphic short sleeve button-down shirt, as well as gray, baggy cargo shorts. We talked for a bit and it turned out that he was a bit of a total asshole who didn't make an effort to be inclusive of most non-binary people. As he was leaving, I suppose I must have said something super aggravating because his older brother came out, grabbed me, and slapped the shit out of me, which I believe is turned into a beating in front of the clinic. My mom helped me out and I guess I got my book about spanking people back??? The dream kind of fell apart after a certain point.
Lucid with Jamie but not sure. I was walking outside of my house? Became lucid randomly. It was night out. I realized I wanted to find Jamie. I had passed a car previously. I turned around to find it but it was gone. I went to the driveway a bit past where the car was parked. A Really old red VW Beetle was parked there (Days later in waking life on the face book swap/n/buy for my are an old red VW beetle was listed. precog dream???). I checked my pocket and had a key. The key looked like an old house key. I acted as if it as the car key. I sat down in the car found a place for the key to turn and went through the motions of starting the car and it worked. I drove downtown in a generic dream city that was like calgary or parts of Toronto. I started saying Jamie's full name out loud. Came to a basket ball court. Saw a Woman standing there with pink dyed hair and brown eyes. Didn't quite look like Jamie but the feeling was that it was her. I pulled up and said Hop in. Jamie looked at me with recognition, and got in the car. Initiated a casual greeting kiss. She acted natural with it. i was very lucid and started with questions. I asked, "Do you read my dreams?" She said "no." and i was shocked at the answer. But it wasn't her anymore. I was talking to a little yappy dog. and it was speaking a different language. I kept asking the same question. It said something like :Yes, and then : no. i was pretty flustered and woke up. Putin Yes, because of the war I started having these dreams while falling asleep. First is a black area and I just see Putin's face. He is angry and says, "I will push with this war into World war 3." Then i can see an explosion reflected in his eyes and then his face. Second dream he had barbed wire around his neck and is choking. From sanctions no doubt?
19th February 2022 Fragment: Some bit outside with childhood friend D. Unusually, he's sad or depressed, in an angry sort of way. There's a city road and cars, they seem abandoned? Later. In a school place with H; there's some Chinese children and we have to walk through this room where some of the children are, to get to the teacher's desk. We have to be careful because the room is somewhat packed. The teacher is male and speaks in English to us. 20th February 2022 Fragment: Something about factions and such. There's a sort of palatial and governmental-like building with guards, who tell me to take my boots off. In a certain part of the dream, playing soccer against my cousin T; we're both bare foot and she kicks me on the genitals as we're playing. It feels purposeful? I tell this lady supervising us that this isn't fair and that I would play better with my boots on anyway. This lady supervising is some sort of regional regent. There is no sense of a waking-world country being related to this place and its government. (later) In the kitchen. Putting something for H in the red thermos (the one from family). 22nd February 2022 ~6:00-10:00 Fragment (DFLN): In some kind of base or complex. The walls are plain concrete or metal and there's a dry-green tinge. There's only artificial lighting and I can't recall daylight at any point. I interact with other characters though I mostly only vaguely recall a segment on some kind of descending shaft with a stairwell or something. A group of assassins that I'm investigating or something? Following a trail perhaps. In this cylindrical shaft with the stairwell I find a katana with a gilded pattern both on the hilt and at the base of the blade, the edge may be gilded too. I discuss the blade with someone, a woman(?) nearby, as I inspect it. Fragment: Space. Going towards the edge of the galaxy with a fleet. I encounter a previously unknown race which sells or trades with us for some technology blueprints they have available, including blueprints for a battlecruiser, or perhaps a battleship. I see a HW-like user interface and accept the exchange. I remember thinking that it would be very helpful to have some extra firepower because of others with overwhelming numbers. Then, in a further region of space, further along towards the galaxy edge I think. Something about space or reality is distorted in this region. 26th February 2022 Scraps: Something about cotton buds; blue stalks, in a clear plastic tub, round? Notes: - I've recently been playing Homeworld, so that's probably part of why there was this theme in the last fragment. Though in the Homeworld games there's mostly a focus towards going towards the galaxy core, as there is in some other similarly themed sci-fi games. In the dream, there was more of a sense of exodus away from the central areas, which also relates partly with the Homeworld story. When I've recently played the game again, I gave the story a lot more thought than the first times I played the games, years ago. - It's curious that there was the theme with the assassins and the katana. I've recently had very vague thoughts about playing Divine Cybermancy again and I feel that the themes in that dream were partly intrusions from these thoughts. - The bit where I'm playing soccer with my cousin, I think we're both adults and it's like she's implied to be an agent for this unknown government. I think in the dream I had a more connected sense of what was what but if I did, I couldn't hold on to recall it after waking. - We were playing in a room and the whole thing felt like some kind of test. I imagine the low-blow has some kind of metaphorical meaning, anything relating to blows or hits to the area is a rare event in my dreams, and usually feels especially symbolic for some reason, perhaps in part due to its rarity too. There was also a sunset and cinematic-like feel, despite the fact I was myself in first-person.
sleep not great, recall affected by stress about world situation. Fair amount of dreaming but got up without much digging so it faded early: + dad window + [something] + crowd outside, aggressive (animal?) morphs into angry short ugly Karen in from of L, I force my way between them to protect L and push the woman away mid?: + need to put the cat in a crate in the kitchen to keep it from peeing everywhere late: + sitting on a couch with a (retired marine?) with the marine's motto song playing in my head
15th February 2022 Fragment: A dark and steel-blue place. I interact with some people. A tunnel or hallway? (most detail faded too much, I left recall too long and radio didn't help) 16th February 2022 Fragment: Watching myself or a video of someone else from a first person perspective. On a bed. Four erections and right hand holding a phone/recording? 17th February 2022 Fragment: (recall very vague) Following and getting into formation with a Rheinland battleship. I'm flying a Banshee and there's something Bretonian nearby, maybe gunboats? I don't think there are any open hostilities.
6th February 2022 Different fragments: - In space, arriving in a ship near a nebula of some kind, with a planet inside and also another star nearby in a different nebula. I mistake the planet for the star a couple of times? I never see either of them up-close and the ship itself is never closer than a light-year in distance. - With H in some house. Daytime and light comes in from the windows, I don't recall seeing outside. Get the impression of a flat and that it belongs to someone else, a friend? There's a cupboard full of biscuits or something, including Belgian chocolate-covered wafers. I think I spot some dark chocolate ones, only to find out they're actually regular chocolate on a closer look, though I then do see some dark chocolate ones and take one. - I do something semi-sexual with H, approaching from behind. - An area with semi-detached houses. Can't remember who else is here but the queen of England is visiting the area. She's on her own with no entourage accompanying her. She's here to visit someone specifically and they don't seem to know each other very well. They have a short and amusing exchange and then start walking down the street together. There's a couple of other people relevant to what's going on and the sound then shifts focus to being on them. - Possibly linked directly with one of the other bits. In a large cave, like something out of Dark Souls. I fight a relatively small dragon and some humanoid as well as other enemies I can't recall. My weapons are frequently breaking but the enemies I kill also drop two-handed weapons fairly often. 12th February 2022 8:00 Fragment: A store, under it there's some cave I've been to before in the dream. It has lost and ancient things. It's dark, though not very much. One of the things here is a giant anthro's skull. It's big enough that I would be able to fit inside its throat area and I remark on this to (I think) H. I try to take it back up to the store. I find a savage native on the way back and he gets spooked by the skull in some way. I try to do something silly or funny but he doesn't seem interested in that. Then, at the store, something about a magazine. (recall gap) In a version of our kitchen. It's tidy and also not in a different kind of way. H just took some poison he asked me to give him. This happened once before in the dream. He doesn't remember this happening before and is now asking me to give him the antidote. I think to myself that it should be in a drawer. I end up looking everywhere and being unable to find it, which makes me explore the kitchen around a bit. (details faded but it was a long dream, might have had micro-woken up a couple of times through it) 9:30? Fragment: (last bit of a dream) Going down a stairwell in an apartment building like old home. Mom is with me and maybe someone else like T. The stairwell is square-ish with a hole/gap in the centre. As we get to the bottom level, a woman comes out of her apartment and starts talking to us. She's a little bit, not flustered, maybe excited and she touches up her breasts and says something about her clothes. Rather than just walk away, I give her some attention. Recall is fuzzy but I notice that she has a bulge around her crotch area and she reveals that she had been a man and kept these bits. But I find this odd, unusual and somewhat implausible, because on closer look her facial and bone structures seem more consistent with someone who's always been female. So I think to myself that actually she was just born with both sets of genitals and that this was a cover story that made it "easier" to explain. Mom is gone pretty early on before this happens and T becomes or is replaced by H. I think that H might be feeling jealous or something.
2nd February 2022 Fragment: A bit like DSP, travelling to a mini water planet orbiting a larger regular planet. I remember trying to build something, though finding it difficult because of not having much terrain to build on initially. Throughout this dream I recall a nice sense of scale and somewhat strange proportions with regards to perspective. Dream: Statue of Liberty arriving in bits for assembly, in several barges/boats. There's a wait for more parts to arrive. Some narration describing what's going on? Some ships are taking more months than they should be taking at sea and others are ending up at nearby docks, but still distant from where they should actually be arriving at. The pieces of the statue are all already turned green. I mostly see all of this from distant or aerial views. Then I see a giant zombie rising from the ocean. It/he isn't hostile but is reckless and sinks at least one ship that happens to be in his path. I vaguely see red glowing eyes? Eventually the entire scale of the dream decreases and instead of a large New York bay, the scene is now a street or room, with no trace of water or having been wet. The zombie is here and is childlike, both in size and behaviour; he's trying to communicate in some way, but not with language, as he doesn't seem capable of it. There's a living child nearby, not sure if a boy or a girl. This child is curious about the zombie and wants to interact or play with him but some nearby adults or parents are very apprehensive and worried about the zombie child and want to keep the living child away, despite the fact that the child doesn't seem frightened or anything. The zombie child seems to have been able to communicate that he wants an engineer or electrician, for something to do with electricity. 5th February 2022 Fragment: Something about having the key to the car and driving around. H is in the passenger seat and we go via some mountainous areas which makes H critique my driving, though I comment that he hasn't been a passenger in a while either. Point of view shifts a few times, between first person and aerial views? Something blends with sci-fi or space context. Notes: - All throughout the dream with the zombie, there was a very grungy, gritty and generally dark or overcast mood to everything. Everything felt desaturated apart from a few details like the red eyes and the green of the statue's plating. - The zombie figure is very clearly lacking specific skills that relate to consciousness but seems to make up for them through keen intuitive and primal instincts with regards to communication. His intents were never clear from the start apart from the fact that there was no open hostility, just a sort of single-minded tunnel-vision. -- There are some other clear elements of unconsciousness about the zombie character, such as the fact that he rises suddenly from the ocean, such as thoughts or images that cross the threshold of consciousness but that do not yet make themselves clear or which have their own nature. -- The giant attribute made me feel a mix of excitement, arousal and concern, as has always been common for me with such themes, a lot of the time. The fact that the character was undead added to the element of concern. - Through most of that dream, I felt mostly detached from everything, like I was mostly there as an observer, though in the second half of the dream I felt more present.
Updated 02-28-2022 at 04:08 PM by 95293
early + [dug for recall, finally some came, assigned two keywords, but forgot by morning] + son S2 is doing some complicated build and his build screen pops up on mine, tons of colored text is scrolling by very quickly later: + driving, both brakes and acceleration are weak, swerve to let drivers pass, approach marin tunnel from B side, on foot at intersection, crossing, girl with see-through pants, guy talking about how he's a (professional game player?), she thinks it's not good, I agree, we're talking. Later I'm telling people about how my (country house outside boots) were getting caught between the pedals and the wall of the driver pedal area. + tiny alligator, large alligator & alligator catchers, alligator-man (who would eat a baby), store shelf with colorful items including mole sauce/preparation + store girl, I think I know her she comments on jeans, sushi buffet, chinese dumplings and rice bowl buffet, crowd appears just as I approach, I've lost key and money? Costs $20
22nd January 2022 Fragment: WoW, playing with MV at one point. Something about doing duo raids and so on. Some weapon racks with axes? 23rd January 2022 Fragment: Some segment about being in a shop looking for a labcoat. Someone suggests one to me and I ask them to hold it out but I find that it doesn't really suit me and that it actually looks more like an undersized blouse. (gap) At a service station. 27th January 2022 Dream: I'm with H, we're going somewhere in a car. I think we've been at home but we're at a service station or something now. I think I need my wallet to get something to eat but I left it at home. Then, someone gets in our car after I've loaded some bags, including a bag like my laptop bag but bigger and red instead of black. The other person is a guy, a bit younger than either me or H. He wants to hang around with us and seems innocent enough. Something about finding a BL chest. (recall gap?) At some place like a school, before the guy appears. The place feels familiar. I go through some hidden and darker halls. At some point I need to wash my hands. I go through a creche and starting washing my hands there but stop when I remember there's a room next door with a normal (and not lower) sink. Some bit later. In a car with H at first. Driving up a road through or into a town. Other drivers are a bit erratic and swervy. Then eventually we're on foot. It smells like urine. We walk up to a dilapidated building. False memory of being here before. H or someone else unlocks the front door. We go in and up some stairs? Then H stays behind a little. I worry a bit and there are two hooded figures slowly moving towards him and I don't understand what he's looking at and feel worried and impatient for him to follow me. Not a dream, visualisation: I vaguely see my alter ego at some stone steps. He's climbing and turned towards the point of view, beckoning. There's a heavenly feel to the place. This all fades quickly. I see my alter ego with a rifle or similar sized gun, doing some kind of heist, presumably on a bank with a vault. I see this in a series of images showing different viewpoints with extreme perspective distortion, like they're CCTV footage and with few frames per second.
15th January 2022 Fragment: Something with Gandalf? Using some kind of shared mental projection technique that allows us to scout some place ahead. First, indoors, a place with white walls and vaulted ceilings (how big?). Blue-ish light, indirect sunlight-like. We walk, still as projections, outside. There's a mish mash of a castle and some house thing. It looks familiar and I'm sure I've seen it before, some awareness or perhaps false memory of having seen it in another dream. Then we knock at some door? A man, sort of fantasy-like and a little fat, answers the door. Something at some point about H's sister. (recall was weak) 17th January 2022 Fragment: Somewhat Victorian place or setting. Cobbled streets in a city. Several different characters. I'm naked and aroused at one point. Someone male interacting with me and trying to convince me of something. Later, a hearth and a fire in a house. I'm naked but under a duvet or something I wrap myself in. (recall was good, but lost it because of the radio; I vaguely recall this dream visually even now and it had a bit of a grungy feel to it) 18th January 2022 Scraps: Looking in recycling bags and seeing the wrong things in either of them. 21st January 2022 Fragment: At old home, daytime. Unusual setting, with implied state of anarchy or non-normality. There's some kind of animosity between white and black people. I have some hope that people will just get along. People have handguns and shotguns. At one point I'm in a flat, looking for stuff, and I have a stand-off with a teenager. (seen in a sort of isometric third person view) I also feel like I'm a teen. We both have handguns and shoot at each other once, I hit him and he misses me. He dies and I dislike the fact that it was necessary to shoot him at all, only firing in self defence, I feel. Later, some WoW bit with choosing a sub-faction even though I'm already Alliance.
Unfortunately, for one reason or another, I keep falling back on my backlog of dreams that I want to put up on this DJ. This is annoying me a bit so I better get back to catching up on myself. 2nd January 2022 Some in-line bracketed notes. Dream: I'm in a version of my current bedroom. The window is across the way from the bed, rather than being to a side. It's sunny and the curtains are open. There's a slightly portly man walking around the room, going on about what was discovered about pork meat, saying he should have known all along and that he was glad he didn't have too much of it in his life. I feel there's some irony considering his physical appearance. (at the time of this dream, I think I felt this had something to do with eating what I like while I can) (recall gap) Then, in a car outside with H. Again, sunny, clear and bright. We're talking? It's a busy place, in a cobbled street. Looks like certain areas in L. A scantily dressed woman waves at me with a smile from a third floor window. I wave back and say hi quietly, wondering why she was being so friendly, but further thinking that she probably just found me attractive. (not something I've ever thought about regarding someone looking at me) Other minor and random interactions in the scope of friendliness with other characters. Me and H talk a bit more. Then, I'm outside the car. I'm sort of standing at the midway point of a crossing that people are using. I'm still within talking distance of H and eventually we agree on something and I walk off. (much recall detail was lost, everything was fairly lively) (recall gap) Then, at a supermarket. I'm walking around trying to find something nice for us to have for lunch, even though some part of me remembers (false memory) making some sandwiches in buns. I end up finding a pastry aisle and I see some meat pasties which I'm interested in getting. I'm not sure where I should put them. I ask an attendant about bags or anything and she says "no, sorry" or something, and I realise that she doesn't actually speak much English. I walk back to the pastries area and eventually spot some paper bags cramped under something. Then, when I grab some they are actually cut out plastic bottles, though I don't realise this during the dream. I use two to find two meat pasties which are now in some slick plastic cases and stuff them in the bottles. While I'm walking about I see a load of people at an entrance door and then they're all looking around the aisle. I realise on some level they're students. (I woke up at some point and I remember falling asleep thinking about how I didn't realise I was dreaming with the previous night's dreams) 9th January 2022 Fragment: In old home kitchen. I grab off the counter some ten by ten printed canvas which is wrapped in heatshrink (clear?). On the canvas is a young man and a woman, they're sitting on a boat or something and there's water behind them. They're family somehow; my nephew/niece, but older? She's sitting and wearing a white dress and a broad white hat. She has golden loop earrings. He's standing and wearing something darker, black or navy. Everything in the painting is moving slightly, the waves are alive and the two are looking towards the point of view and smiling. (this dream was especially vivid in my mind at the time for a while and the idea of a canvas with moving imagery was very exciting at the time)
I had a dream earlier this morning where my mom's physical condition became progressively worse and it made me anxious about if it's even possible to live independently anymore. After I woke up, Aaron mentioned we could move to the Netherlands if push comes to shove but I'd miss my friends
+ [f] fiddling with electronic components that aren't working right + [f] inspecting a collection of small tapes (like DV video recorder tapes) that I know have the recording of many voice calls of me talking to Cam.Ed., they're I believe "sweet talk", I think listening to them will be annoying because I do not like the sound of my own voice on recordings + outside in nature with trees around, we arrive to dock/shore leave at a lake, while making the approach there is a view of a young woman on the left making repetitive movements (and digging in the ground?). Come to lake, walk out on dock, then with cousin PaRi standing on tall/large boulders amongst a bunch of such boulders in the lake, looking down in to the water, reminiscing with him about diving into the water. We're talking about how others don't use a good jumping/diving strategy (?). I think about (say?) how one dives and twists appropriately, thinking that if you don't jump far enough outwards that you'll lose skin off your chest as you scrape along the boulder. paint spots (red/green/blue) appear on ground in a pattern, I know this is part of a "native indian" ritual. Look up, there is a large group of them moving slowly on the opposite hillside (leading down into the water) from left to right (generally towards me). I look at them and they don't look particularly Indian, rather white instead, one of them is directly in front of me, stops and waits, and I move aside out of his way and he continues on. + walking outside daylight, straight road, heading to meeting(?), paths/nature to either side. There is "naked guy" who strips his clothes off & gets naked, and sits down to sun with his back against a rock/tree/wall, I know he always [fake memory] suns naked in this spot every day. I think how uncomfortable it is to have this naked guy around and within view. I see off the right a bit further on in the direction I'm walking, a man preparing a picnic/meeting spot for his sweetheart, but she is not there yet (she doesn't know how to find it?). He has a bottle of champagne and there is a tree stump or seat there, which I think they're going to use to take (racy?) pictures. Not much farther, off the path to the left, I see a young woman whom I know is the one with that man, she has also set up a meeting spot with a bottle of champagne -- they have miscommunicated and aren't able to make their connection with each other. A bit farther and I'm with (friends?) fishing. I'm casting a line out in to the water and reeling it in. As I'm (or someone?) is reeling it in, the single line multiples into 6-8 parallel lines all getting reeled in. Then someone else casts a fishing line to the right of these lines and I say "no, no, they'll get all tangled!" and I anticipate a mess of the lines getting tangled. Then I'm indoors and I am reading from a (prayer?) book, I'm supposed to be reading prayers? I'm thumbing through the book and I can't find the right page where I'm supposed to be. The prayers I see are all very long and I don't want to be reading those. I hear a multi-note tune and (am told?) know that this is the tune for the prayer that must be repeated over and over while singing the words. I need to be praying for some man?
bedtime, ~00:15 final waking: ~08:00? out of bed: ~08:30? early: + at the pool: drink, water on deck, crawl race, swim faster/harder, win mid: + [vivid] enter gate to lower bridge section with 2 men, piano room on left, ancient piano, hardly any keys, some foot pedal/keys (like an organ), another piano in another room, hear piece, then sit and play it on the few keys remaining late: + meet stunningly beautiful young woman on street, we speak, I have to wear a hat, huge floppy rim about 1 meter in radius, "well at least this'll get me my social distancing!" I say + [f] scene outside a building, I'm putting something down (a bicycle?) but I'm worried about blocking the building's circulation intake filter which is right there + I'm a political consultant, some official with weird bloody gums is getting advice from me
early: + car with Gore, talk about airline flight, chips/fingernail in hand, on high hill, take off gliding flying by LHS look left will do that later, wires/barrier at gate, land, climb fence, electrified, other guys, enter room, long narrow like gym, guys there, man with one tooth, move to far exit mid: + in room turning on water boiler, (getting dressed?) thinking about its noise; Jn. E. outside day on her roof lying on top looking down (searching for me?) I see her from side, imagine loving her again, having sex with her later: + wading in bay with S1 & S2, shells, they go below surface latest: bunch of short scenes: + S1 and S2 in room, I'm trying to read (email?) on mobile I don't want them to see, S2 curious bends face around to see screen + old dog L: see through window, with him scab on back, lying on cough he's very long + fireworks store with W1, kids let in only a few at a time, very popular, staff welcmoe to store, books as well as fireworks, I speak in for.lang about "book about fireworks" (grammar not quite right), think about what to do about W1 because there's W2 now, think about sex with W1 + standing at corder of building: boarded and bricked up windows, then two-tone painted brown corner of brick building, dark brown and light cappucino, look at and notice the color + high on a platform outside, tossing a football with a guy on the ground. One lans in my area I pick it up an throw a decent spiral back he catches it, he's throwing it all around to different people, he's annoying people by tossing it around really hard like a quarterback.
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