Non-Lucid Dreams
In the earliest parts I can remember, I’m traveling on a ship with a friend when the water underneath starts to swirl. Soon, a whirlpool has formed, and we’re spinning around as the wall of water grows higher around us. It now seems to be just us in the water – the whole dream was a bit iffy on continuity – and I see a smaller spiral under the surface near me. I move away, but it follows. It strikes me that this thing is only after me, not my friend, so I pass them something which is supposed to be a useful tool of some kind and encourage them to leave. I am alone now. The ship (or something, anyway) seems to be back, and there’s nothing to do but wait, I figure. I pull out a book—The Hobbit—so I can read until it feels like manifesting. At some point, a dark, oppressive energic atmosphere begins to form—not something visible, but a feeling hanging over everything—and it does show itself – in the form of Bilbo Baggins. Simultaneously with this, I now seem to be Frodo. “Bilbo” starts going on an exaggerated diatribe about what an awful book “The Hobbit” is. This goes on for quite a while, interspersed with my occasional sarcastic responses. The continuity continues to be rather sketchy, with “Bilbo” occasionally disappearing and subsequently reappearing elsewhere, and once, apparently accidentally, walking into view undisguised before the previous one has finished talking, appearing as a figure cloaked in black, face hidden beneath a hood. But then, a little later, it’s back to “Bilbo” again. He now has his own copy of “The Hobbit,” enclosed in a bubble wrap packing envelope which he’s holding by one corner as if it’s something disgusting. There’s a whole tub filled with bubble wrap beside him. I haven’t been taking anything that’s happened the least bit seriously so far—I’ve been treating it as if it’s some kind of unavoidable everyday nuisance rather than an actual threat—but somehow, in this whole improbable series of events, it is the bubble wrap that gets me thinking critically about what’s going on. “Bubble wrap. Why?” I say aloud. There is no bubble wrap in Middle Earth. I think it over just to be sure. No, it’s quite impossible. Couldn’t happen. I then proceed to do the only logical thing one can do under the circumstances: transform myself into a cat and leap into the bubble wrap-filled crate. But it’s just then that the dream ends, and I awaken. 4.11.21
I’m in a library, doing research for a school assignment. While I’m still not sure what materials I’ll need for it, I figure it would be a good idea to get some likely books since I happen to be here anyway. The assignment seems to involve music, specifically the composer Borodin, so I return to a shelf on the floor directly above the ground one where I had been earlier in the dream. About all I can remember of that earlier part was listening to a song with a couple other people, including my aunt. It had a heartbreakingly beautiful ending, but when I asked my aunt for a translation from the Russian, the text turned out to be a rather banal folk song about two mice. Anyway, once I get there, I pull a book from the shelf and flip it open to an analysis – probably a violin part, in either D or E. A very simplified reduction shows the staff with the I note, the IV and V above it a little later on, and then the ii on the octave below. The text explains how the melody avoids these structurally important notes (IV and V) and instead goes in a series of dark, ambiguous spirals that land on the ii each time. 27.10.21
I continue to have a repetitive dream. I go to Cuba with my car and that is really weird because you cannot take a car to Cuba. Most of the time a take the car inside my suitcase and that is really non sense. All of the sudden I forget where my car is parked and that's it. There is a variation, someone sell me a car and then I realize that the care is really old and shabby.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP At some gathering with friends and strangers, Zilla is there, as well as some guys from my school time and the french girl Sophie I met in a band. We are wrapping up the party and there is food and drinks for anyone to take home. Sophie asks me if I want a packet of milk. I say no thanks, don't eat dairy. Then I check a fridge which is full of vegan yogurts and decide to grab some. Unfortunately I make a mess when splitting the yogurt cups, because the lids detach very easily. I then grab some half empty juice packages and start filling a bag with the stuff I am collecting. Then wonder if I could come during the weekend instead, with my car so I can get some more stuff, instead of trying to take this by hand today. But they say the place will be closed during the weekend. As I leave, I notice this place is in a mountain area and surrounded by an improvised camping site where a lot more people are staying for some more festivities. I go down a road and have a strange encounter with what seems like giant white cow with heart shaped light brown spots. She seems to try to interact with me but then I notice more people behind me also observing the being and she keeps her distance and even seems a bit disturbed by all the curious eyes. She then becomes a woman but still gigantic and very bizarre looking, out worldly. I don't understand what's going on, but someone says she is this mythical creature from this woods and she is spotted frequently and doesn't like crowds. As I see her disappearing down the road and people start dispersing, it is also getting dark and I spot a UFO in the sky. It seems to be coming lower and lower and nearly touches the trees around me. It is dark and has blue and green lights underneath. I go after it, in the hope to see it up close. It lands downhill in an open area by the side of another road. It is about the the size of a big car and I see two or three passengers coming out of it. I try to lay low behind some trees, but one of them turns in my direction and very specifically calls my name telepathically. I get chills down my spine. I don't know what to do, but it occurs to me to run for a second, But I immediately feel numb and paralyzed and feel myself levitating against my will towards them. I am conscious yet totally unable to fight it. When close to the ship, they release me from the tractor beam or mind spell and invite me to seat inside with them. I decide since they are being polite, to go along and try to enjoy the ride. I try to notice all the details. The feeling I have now is that of a lucid dream, I am trying to stay hyper aware and memorize all the details, but never thought this was a dream. They are three, they all look like human females with short hair and in some sort of tight tracker suits. I notice strange that although their hair colors are natural, between blond and light brown, they have incredible colored patterns t the neck level which seem to prolong onto the skin on their necks, like dye or make up. The ship is really just like a car in which there are two seats in the front and one is for the pilot and two seats in the back for passengers, separated by some kind of net or mesh. The ship is triangular in shape and although outside the chassis was dark, it looks transparent when seen from the inside. I can understand them talking among each other telepathically and to me it sounds like french for some reason. I understand the co-pilot is actually a male and he is uncomfortable with the whole disguise and specially with it being a human female. He complains about it and the others say he shall get used to it. I wonder if they are shapeshifters and I do see that area of their necks, experiencing some fluctuations, like a projection with some glitches. I fear that they might look really scary but I also try to stay positive and think it doesn't matter what they really look like as long as they treat me with care. They capture my entire train of thought and don't confirm with words but I can feel their feelings confirming this is not their true form, that they use it to look less intimidating to me, even the choice of being all female looking. I ask if they are cool or if I should worry about something. Their answer doesn't leave me very relaxed. They say they don't mean to harm me, but can't promise I won't be hurt. I ask why and they say the surgery is a bit painful. I freak out "What surgery? Why do you guys always have to do surgery? What is the purpose?" And they say it is not harmful, it is actually to make me able to survive in their ship and environment. Something about pressure and gases, they show me my abdomen swelling like a balloon and they say they need to perforate to release pressure and apparently other interventions without basically anesthetics. That I don't get why and I start feeling afraid of the pain. But they say it's necessary and that it will be compensated by the training in the theoretical part, that I will love that. And I feel curious again; "what theoretical part?'. Once again they don't use words but I get a feeling from them they will be sharing a lot of info with me for almost a week. We arrive at some kind of hangar, maybe a bigger ship that is stationed, I can't tell in the dark. There is what appears like an elevator and they put me on a stretcher and imply I will now be taken to surgery room as we ascend to space. I am like "You're really taking me to space?" Then I remember my mom and rest of the family who will go crazy not knowing anything from me for a week. I ask them to please contact my family and tell them that I am ok, but I know that they won't. Then I lose consciousness. And wake up.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP In a small village in Africa. Find out the villagers slaughtered all their cattle, plus a bunch of rhinos for meat and I am in shock, because it is unlike them. I am told they were forced by some local terrorist group, commanded by a couple white men, who are taking control of the region. A little baby white rhino bruised and covered in blood comes to me seeking for help. My heart is so broken. I hug him and take him to some friends at another nearby village, who promise to take care of the baby and raise him. They also take me to the city, an old town inside rammed walls and designed with tight streets and labyrinthine tunnels. I am staying with some missionary white ladies in a sort of convent or nunnery in the innermost part of the city. News arrive that the terrorist group is taking over the city and we are warned that because we are white women, we should run and hide as best as we can, because they won't be gentle with us if they find us. The nuns escape through some underground tunnels but I grab some knifes and a small sword and I go look for the invaders. Quietly and unannounced, I cut the throats of the men I find, one by one. But they finally realize my presence and then start looking for me in pairs or groups of three or four at a time. I still kill them all. There is one guy I find unarmed and who doesn't offer me a fight and I let him go. I explain I hate killing and just do it if I have to. He goes to his leaders and I know he is gonna warn them about me. I try to sneak into their command center, but it is heavily guarded. The access is through a square, with a huge watermill in the center of a pond. The watermill is a 4 storeys high structure. I am actually coming from above, through a platform connecting a higher location of the town to the watermill which pumps water up. I use the watermill to descend to the square ground level without being spotted. On the pond I encounter a fellow resistance fighter who seems to have had the same idea. But I am spotted. The fact that I am wearing a bright red shirt doesn't help. They didn't spot my friend though, so I surrender before they see him to. The leaders come out of their HQ and say they are surprised I gave up so easily, considering the rumors of the lady who's been killing all their men single-handedly. But I point to the 6 men in front of me, 2 with machine guns and 4 with some kind of riffles with very large barrels and I say I brought knifes to a gun fight and know when resisting is just pointless suicide. So they capture me and as I expected, the two leaders are a couple guys my age who are immediately smitten by me. I get rid of my wet red shirt and I am in shorts and bra, rocking my hot body to taunt them even more. They won't allow any other men to touch me and they escort me personally to a safe place where they provide me dry clothing and also offer me jewels. I find it stupid, but I'll play the game if they want to doll me up. They keep me close to them as they go about their plans and that's Just what I wanted.
I had one Jamie dream... It was all audio Just me almost waking up and hearing her talking. Other various dreams I can barely recall. One was a driving related dream, one where my brakes weren't working. Another dream I came home and there were a bunch of stray cats in my house,I do have a couple of cats living here, but these weren't them... Mall? I was at a mall with someone, maybe my brother. I kept looking for a certain place, I went down the right escalator and through the food court but it was a different store. Found an arcade but the ones where you try to win prizes. There were four or five kids in there but they weren't letting me play any games. Every time i went to an empty game they kept taking over that game before I could do anything about it. We kept arguing about it. Strange Was in a creepy weird house. From the living room I found an extra hidden room by a very skinny hallway. I peeked in the room and Saw David Bowie on a bed dying of cancer... I know he's already been dead a few years now but wtf... I felt like I was not supposed to be there so I just left.
4th October 2021 Scraps: (a long dream, but poor recall) Some RTS segment and I recall beaches and water. One part a bit Minecraft-like or some other game. T is here and someone else is with me? Some kind of tower, or otherwise large structure. One of the last parts of the dream, I am my alter-ego and there are interactions with me as such. The other people are dream-generated. They seem to be pressuring me, or something? Despite my form, I feel slightly shorter than others. Some other dream? H has convinced mom and dad to bring S over here. I think H goes to pick them up and I remember seeing them all at one point. I feel concerned about S because of all the usual reasons regarding costs and also because of the long trip. Notes: - The last part was certainly a reflection of how I sometimes don't feel listened to or validated on, regarding both matters of money and of companionship. In the segment, some beliefs I hold as very important are partly betrayed by my closest, besides the fact I feel it may be detrimental to both S's health and to my financial situation. - That same segment probably also relates to how I have often been very easily upset by changes to what a situation is and changes to what it would be or would have been. - More recently it has been more frequent for me to take on my alternate form in my non-lucid dreams. In this case, the context likely relates to my art and some perception that the expectations of others are above my own. My stature is clearly metaphorical in regards to my feelings in terms of recognition, but this dream element also relates directly to some of my choice themes and how I've often felt physically inadequate in some specific areas (primarily to my own expectations) when compared to others. -- I do not recall what exactly the other people were pressuring me about, but in terms of my waking life contexts, art is the most directly relevant context here.
1st October 2021 Fragment: I am in T's room. We're sitting together at his desk, which is facing the window. The curtains are open and it's a sunset outside. The sun keeps glaring in my face and I struggle with the brightness. At the same time, I can't get comfortable at the desk. I have a square monitor and my arms and wrists hurt with the way they rest on the desk, partly because my chair is too short. T says to do something about it then, and I get some pillows to stack on the seat. In the middle of all this struggling, I end up at first missing the fact that the sunset is now over and the light is on now, but the curtains are still open. (recall gap, the following are scraps from the same dream) In WoW, I am mailing an item to myself. Some kind of developer marriage is interrupted by fans. I am then in a Star Trek universe and am with an away team. End up in a room back on the ship where I try to use a replicator but I end up pooping myself in the room's bathroom or something. Notes: - The Star Trek locale was very reminiscent to the sets and layouts of Voyager, which I've recently been watching. -- In that part of the dream, I remember feeling confused at several points and many things were going against me, in terms of events playing out. I think I may have been confined to some quarters. The replicator I tried using didn't function properly, at least for anything I wanted, but I can't recall what that mighthave been anymore. - In the WoW segment, I was mailing an item to the same character I was playing and not an alt, something that's never been possible. -- I have a faint recollection of the locale being some altered version of Stormwind. - During the initial segment of the dream, I am struggling with issues that typically T would be more likely to struggle with, at least in regards to his room and layout. I would not have so much of an issue with the sun and would probably be appreciating it, in waking life. In a way, this dream moment is a window into my perception of his experience, on some level. - The experience of struggling against the glaring sunset reminds me now very strikingly of the time I was walking back home with mom, at a time of a sunset but during which I hit my head on something metal and started bleeding, all of which was caused by struggling against a glaring sunset directly ahead.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP Traveling with my mom and for some absurd reason, we have to go through La Palma island as a stopover (currently, in RL, there is an active volcano on the island), We are left at a safe distance from the volcano, but the layover is taking much longer than was supposed to and we are put temporarily in a hotel as we wait. There is a big earthquake and the volcano has a massive eruption with a giant mushroom cloud that expands in our direction. We try closing all windows and seek shelter. My mom ends up going down a cave which she found to be accessible through an opening on the basement floor, and she gets lost in there. I try to follow her for part of the way, using a rope she used to descend, but at some point it enters a small hole I can't possibly pass through. Probably some rocks dislocated and blocked her way. I go ask for help but everybody is busy with their own rescues of friends and family members. One guy tells me there is a way to access the below cave she got into, through some pool of toxic chemicals jn another area of the basement. But I need to dive in and swim down until I find a passage to the cave and no way I am going to die swimming in toxic waste, so I just go back to the first entrance and keep calling for mom, trying to hear some sound from her. Maybe same island, I live there with my mom and we work in some local factory making traditional handmade juices. I have a friend whom everybody thinks I like, but she is actually more like a bully whom I'd rather ditch. One day she drives us in her car to go explore some caves by the coast. She gets stuck in a small passage and can't get out. I try to help her, but realize she needs to be rescued by professionals. Instead of calling for help, I cover up the entrance as if there was a rock collapse and I take her car over a cliff into the sea so it isn't found. And I feel a mix of relief and guilt, but mostly relief. Nobody knows we were coming here together, so I have a good chance she is never even found. I still try to cover all tracks like deleting messages between us, etc. I also pack a bag to leave the town if I need to go on a run. But for a couple days no one even notices her missing. She was a bit wild, so even her family doesn't suspect anything if she is away without a warning. But eventually she is considered missing. By now I am sure there are no evidences linking me to her disappearance and all I fear is my emotional reaction in case I am questioned by the police. One day a couple detectives come to the factory, because she also worked there, and they interrogate us all in group and watch our reaction. They find me and my mom the most odd ones, and confront us, especially my mom, saying she was last seen going out from her work that day and apparently something had gone wrong in her work and mom reprimanded her. And she is clearly nervous. In my case they find strange that I don't show sadness or concern for my friend's missing. So I ask the detective if I can speak to her in private. And I approach her very confidently and explain I am diagnosed autistic and one of my symptoms is commonly not showing my emotions and that my mom is not diagnosed but even my psych said she probably is also autistic, but unlike me, she is overemotional and can sometimes lose control of her feelings. The detective feels a bit uncomfortable and I tell her I can show her my medical evaluation if she wants some proof, but she nods her head like "no need" and she looks ready to move on into some other direction.
jamie Just one dream this week. I remember I was Talking to Jamie on the phone. In this dream she lived in Saskatchewan. She seemed really happy to talk to me. Don't recall any other dreams,.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP I am dying and thinking of my guru. He is teaching somewhere and I can't come to see him, but he feels something is wrong. He astral projects to see what I am up to and finds me in a hospital bed, unconscious. I can see him though. He freaks out seeing me like this, so he immediately packs his bags and gets on a plane. Turns out we are under a war and he is advised not to travel. But it is all he thinks about with a mix of despair and fear of not seeing me alive again.
Crazy Was on a dirt road outside some restaurant. Went inside there was a group there. They were being really noisy. Some strange bald Native American girl started attacking me for no reason. Her head was shaped like the people in "Coneheads." The group pulled her off me and they all left the building. I went outside angry and everyone from the group was in a large green bus. They talked to me for a bit and then pulled out of the driveway. I saw someone at the other side of a pond watching me. He seemed familiar like someone I work with and I called to him. His face distorted and i became lucid. I kept telling him I knew him and that this was a dream. eventually he walked away and the dream ended. I don't know Why I waste so many lucids on telling people that it is a dream... Wrong I was in some living room when a young girl came up to me and said I could touch her. I was like, "wait. How old are you? Can I see some ID?" or something she answered twice both times giving a different age. Both were underage answers and I felt like this was a bad situation That I should just leave. I remember getting up to leave and that's where the dream ends. Jamie? A dream with Jamie in it. She seemed a lot taller than I remember, and she wasn't talking to me or happy with me? not sure.
24th September 2021 Left recall too late. Fragment: I'm in Gruul's lair, it's mostly like in WoW but something seems more realistic in detail, characters maybe? Me and a raid group kill Gruul rather quickly. It's a 25 man group but oddly most of the characters aren't actual players? I remember talking to someone too. 26th September 2021 There were other dreams but recall was again left too late I think? Fragment: One bit where I'm in space with an Avorion spaceship. I approach one of those concentric asteroid ring formations. Something later about dad talking to me about a mission or a bet which is worth sixty eight million. I am dismissive. Notes: - Maybe the realistic character details come from recently playing Conan Exiles. - It may have been that I was speaking to L in the Gruul's lair dream but I cannot recall. There seemed to be some kind of backwards logic to the raid progression. - I haven't actually been playing much in the way of space games.
13th September 2021 Recall mostly gone, left initial writing for too long. Fragment: I'm on our street but it's not like in waking life. It's a mix of streets from old London as in films and also of where H's mom lives. I just gout out of the car, maybe on my own. It's day time, but overcast? In the dream everything has a very real feel to it. As I'm dreaming, my memory feels fuzzy; "18, that's not the number of J's door, but this doesn't look like our street?" I think to myself. I'm not sure what conclusion I made but I eventually go to ring the doorbell and go in. J is here briefly, I think. The house looks nothing like any of our homes, it just seems dream generated. Something about a pit or elevator shaft. Some task or chore that needs doing, possibly related to it? While indoors, it seems like the outside gets brighter than it had been. 20th September 2021 Scraps: Getting into fights and arguments with my eldest sibling. As a dream character he blends with some stereotype/nasty dream character archetype. He's treating me like shit and has called me pathetic a great number of times over several days (false memory). I threaten him saying "I can change but you won't like it." I resist an urge to flip the dining table against him. Mom and dad defend me in their ways. Dad mentions something about if he'd had the dream/nightmare that I had... (my recall of this trailed off but there was an implied behaviour that he was being understanding) At some point I throw a wooden chair against the wall. (It breaks?) Night time, we're in the second floor of the old home, the kitchen is L shaped. Some other dream also involving old home themes, recall vague. I remember looking at some M/M stuff (on the computer?) and then some kind of disagreements? 22nd September 2021 Fragment: In a supermarket with H. Very realistic, completely dream generated setting. Lots of running (literal?) around, as it's closing soon. Night time, they dim the lights but too much, I feel. I hope that H will complain as I am running around. Then the lights are still dim, but more acceptably so. Notes: - Recall has actually not been too bad in general for the last few months, but I keep leaving recall too long or falling asleep again without enough awareness to either recall later or to set an intent to notice I was falling asleep. - In the second fragment, there's some sort of mirroring with the initial context and an incident when I was six or seven, at school.
I haven't posted on here in a while and I wanted to start again, even though I regularly say that. Anyways: The dream was about my family and I, along with some random girl, (not sure why) and we were at our home. While we were watching the news, we saw that the Mandarin from Iron Man 3 was about to launch a missile in our neighborhood. We were very scared so we decided to hide in the office. We got lucky enough to where it didn't hit us, though.
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