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Outside view of ‘my house’ [not house in waking life] It is dark outside, but the house is white and lit by moonlight. On the roof there is a small cemetery. Suddenly I am in the house, upstairs, near the window facing the cemetery. I hear a voice whispering my name: ‘soooolaaeeetttiiiaaa…I’m looking for sssooolllaaaeettiiaa…’ I open the window and there is a small creature with a black hooded cloak. It asks me if I will tickle it. <This sounds way more scary as I type it than it was experiencing it. The creature, although it’s skeletal face was mostly obscured, seemed benign.

I was working at the old cafe, but we had desks and small 8”-10” retro monitors. One of my monitors just said ‘baseball’ in white type on a black screen. A man who was either just hired or a new client hovered over me as another boss/employee explained what I was working on. I felt my space was being violated. Later, I was in the restroom and a man walked in looking around for things. I yelled at him to get out, and he argued that he knows what I look like and isn’t interested in me, he just needed some things from this room. Again, I felt violated.

People from the cafe were boxing up there things, I was one of the last people in the building. I had three bags and many different clothes and shoes that I was trying to gather and decide what to wear. A girl was lugging her things out and remarked on all the people being jailed. I responded that I was surprised or something, and she asked me in a slight shock if I wasn’t being arrested too? I said no they hadn’t arrested me, and she seemed to think that was unfair and continued on her way.


Thoughts:
My dreams seem uninteresting and meaningless at the moment, and I don’t feel like I am gaining much insight- expect that I am not very attend to my inner self at the moment. Maybe that’s the point. I feel distracted by things going on in my waking life. I know though that continuing to journal I will have some break throughs and get back to where I want to be, and hopefully progress from there.

I've been thinking lately about something a friend said to me, apparently if you stay properly hydrated during the day then your body will need 30% less sleep during the night. This is because keeping hydrated allows it to function better during the day so you don't need to recover as much while sleeping. I started paying attention to how hydrated I've been and noticed that the days where I stay extremely well hydrated result in the nights being more vivid with a higher chance of lucidity. I had 2 lucids last night which was unexpected, especially since the activities I spent time on doing yesterday usually result in me being less aware (reading, gaming, watching shows, exercising). My awareness has also just been generally gobshite over the past few days, despite meditating every night. I also didn't meditate last night since I was too tired, but I did consume a massive amount of liquids throughout the day. The only variable I can think of was that I drank like 3 different kinds of tea which I usually don't drink at all. Other than that my diet was completely the same as always.
I think staying hydrated could be a key condition for myself getting lucid at night, so I'll keep paying attention to it for now.

Dream 1 - Cafe Playground
I remember being with my daughter inside a playground (like the ones in McDonald's). She was much younger than she is now so I was helping her out a lot. I remember being able to see her mother/family outside the playground, we decide to head down a slide and go see them. We get down safely and go sit in the cafe that we appeared in. Next to me is someone from the family but I can't recognize who. I order a smoothie, it must be blueberry (guessing from the blue colour). I think I get up to go pay or something and I realize the baby isn't on me, so I turn around and go pick her up but I realize I'm dreaming. I wander past the cafe (it's like a small cafe they in the middle of the mall) and look around. The area seems similar to the mall near where I live, I think about what to do and come to a decision. In 1 of my previous lucids I was able to enter a VIP area by the elevator and wanted to see if I could get in there again. I find an elevator and press the button a few times. Geeze I feel like it's not working, eventually I wake up. The dream was pretty standard for my lucids, about 30-60 seconds.

Dream 2 - Star Wars office
It was like I was in a star wars video game (like jedi academy), I was doing a mission in an enemy base. The corridors were all metal and there was an opened gateway to my right. Past the gateway was a rocky cliff that seemed to end in an endless abyss, but there was another gateway on the other side. I'm sprinting along as I see this gateway, the doors on both sides are slowly closing, I do a huge leap over the abyss and tumble under the gateway on the other side. It was really close but I managed to make it before the door closed. I then enter the stars wars galactic government room, with all those floating things the politicians talk from. I remembered that in a video I watched a while ago the race E.T. was from was part of the galactic government, for some reason I really felt like looking around for them. After not being able to see them (though there were definitely a whole variety of alien species around) I had the awareness to become lucid. I decided that, unlike in my last lucid earlier in the night, I would reality check and attempt to stabilize a bit and then pursue a dream goal. I pushed my thumb into the palm of my hand, stretching it and confirming the dream state. Next I decided that I'd continue my search for a dream guide, the area I was in was more like a business work floor now. I remember seeing a girl walk past so I tried asking her if she was my dream guide, she kept moving away too fast and I couldn't catch up. She was only walking at a normal pace and I was running, she should have been a metre apart but eventually the distance increased to several metres and she disappeared. I got too caught up in the chase and ended up waking up.

Dream 1 - Ankh-morpork
I was in Ankh-Morpork (from Terry Pratchetts Discworld novels) and I was joining the Thieves Guild. I remember wandering the streets not far from the Mended Drum.

Dream 2- Kitchen Anger
I'm my parents house, in the kitchen. I'm really annoyed at my dad, he did something or said something frustrating as hell. Me and my mum are making breakfast as we talk and she's talking to me about not getting worked up over it, I go to the fridge and, with a spoon, get a gob-full of cream and eat it. It's the same kind of cream they have at the top of non-homogenized milk, but it's just sitting on the fridge shelf without even being on a plate.. And there's a lot of it, like tower of cream.
My dad comes into the kitchen to make his breakfast, me and my mum finished whatever it was he was going to eat. He starts making bacon and eggs, geeze.. for breakfast, really? I think at some point he was done and I turned on the stove and he puts his hand down without looking and burns himself. FUUU damn it dad! I try turn the stove off quickly, what an idiot. At this point the flattee from downstairs is in the kitchen for some reason, and he has two friends with him. My mum is insinuating to me not to get annoyed at my dad in front of them because it would be embarrassing or something, though I feel the same way.

Dream 3 - Lucid in the village
I'm in the town area of where I live (it's part of the city, but there's so many trees out here that you wouldn't know it) and I'm walking by the bird cafe. There's people milling about and I start to tune into the fact that I'm dreaming... It comes slowly, the awareness building in me until I attain lucidity. Everything around me is crisp and detailed, really vivid. I can feel my arms clearly, I decide to walk forward and as I do so I notice a decreases in stability. Hm, I focus on the sensations in my arms which are intense.. Like all tingly and fuzzy. I start trying to think of what the TotM is but just can't seem to get access to my memories. I think I've stabilized enough now, I continue onwards and think about the TotM more. Eventually the feeling in my arms fades and I lose stability again, I then wake up.

So close Emnition! Was a pain to be lucid and not be able to remember anything. It was really good for a lucid though, lots of detail like there was an old granny sitting on a chair by a table outside the cafe. Also there were people passing by in front of me to cross the road. Anyways, next tim

Ritual: I haven't let myself get bothered by my dry spell of the last few weeks, since it was easily attributable to lack of motivation and practice. My work life has been much more relaxed, so I think dreaming has been less psychologically necessary. I'm starting to observe a consistent pattern where I get lucid more frequently and intensely at times when I am under the most stress in waking life. I always think I'll have more time to work on dreaming when that stress disappears, but usually I find my motivation disappears along with it. I think this is because when I have more free time, I indulge in other kinds of experiences that satisfy my mind in a way similar to dreaming: films, books, and especially computer games.

Recently I started getting irritated with the bad dream recall and lack of lucidity, and decided to put more work into it. I did a few WILD attempts where my inability to count much higher than ten revealed my lack of mental focus and clarity, and they went nowhere. Today I found myself wide awake after sleeping four hours, a perfect WBTB, so I decided to try again. I didn't want to take any active supplements (alpha-gpc, galantamine, or piracetam), but I also didn't want to miss out on the placebo effect and reifying of intentions that might be gained from swallowing something, so I took a few tablets of bacopa and one of NAC. For good measure I also strapped on my MotivAider, set to 45 minutes, then lay down to do some counting. My focus was still crap.

I was not fully asleep yet when I felt the first pulse of the MotivAider, however it roused me enough that I noticed I was seeing some really amazing hypnagogic patterns. This is the first time I've experienced such distinctly geometric and symmetrical patterns in the hypnagogic state. I got up to use the bathroom and was amazed at the way the patterns persisted every time I closed my eyes, moving and transforming. I was tempted to wake up more fully to sketch them, but realized I could make better use of this state, so I preserved it and kept watching the imagery as I lay back down in bed.

I decided to skip the counting this time and work directly on tactile sensations. I concentrated on trying to move the dream body without activating my real one, and there was that inevitable ambiguity at first, but then I reached up to touch my face and I was pretty sure it was my dream arm that did it. I felt around my mouth with my tongue and was sure of it: the taste in my mouth felt too flat, too muted, to even be the normal background mouth-taste that we typically overlook. When I was confident that I had integrated into the dream body, I got up into my bedroom.

WILD, "Reflections / Zznvogayi": It is my first time getting lucid this month, so I decide to try a TOTM. The mirror task is convenient, since there are large mirrored sliding closet doors only steps away from my bed. I walk over and stand in front of one. At first I think the reflection bears a close resemblance to me, only with fuller cheeks and smaller eyes. But rapidly these features grow more exaggerated until they no longer look like me at all: the face is horribly bloated and the eyes have all but vanished beneath the puffy surrounding tissue. I recognize this as DR: I've been reading Gyo, a horror manga by Junji Ito, and it's full of faces like this. I force myself to keep watching as the image becomes more and more hideous, as though it is deliberately trying to unnerve me, but I remain calm and at last it vanishes.

It seems like the show is over, but the TOTM instructions were to keep looking as long as you can, so I continue watching the mirror. For a while it shows no reflection at all, just an empty dark space. Then a new reflection appears. This woman is beautiful, elegantly dressed in an archaic ballgown. I note that the bottom of her dress expands into almost a full half-sphere, and recall that this style was characteristic of the 1850s. I look up toward her face, but even though the expansive bottom of her dress is brightly illuminated, her entire upper body is in deep shadow and I can make out nothing but the silhouette of an appealingly slender torso. I keep staring until finally a tinge of light illuminates the lower curve of a shapely breast. I never do see the rest of her. As I continue watching, she is replaced by a male figure. I have the impression of a hairy man in rough clothing or primitive furs, but already the dream is deconstructing itself around me and when it stabilizes I am in another place entirely.

I find myself at the top of stairs leading down through water and rockery, landscaping that reminds me of a Chinese garden, though the buildings on all sides look contemporary. I wander down the stairs wondering what to do next. In late May I finally started playing Dragon Age: Inquisition, and was delighted to discover that one of the core characters is a lucid dreamer. This gives me the idea to try to summon him. Summoning people, historical or fictional (I rarely attempt it with WL people because I feel like it would be rude to deal with their doppelgangers), has always been my weakest area of dream control, but I'm determined to make it work. At first I hope to recognize the character among random DCs passing by, but don't see any likely candidates. Then I notice that at the bottom of the stairs is a large cafe, with a number of tables clustered in a semi-interior space with no front wall. This gives me an idea.

The cafe is organized enough to have a hostess desk, so I approach the two women working there and tell them, "There's someone waiting for me." When they ask his name, I say "Solas." One of the women acknowledges that he is here, and tells me to follow her. Oh my, is my trick actually working? I worry that I might get too excited over the prospect of success and destabilize the dream, and of course even that thought comes dangerously close to doing so, but I quell it and force myself to keep going along with the events I've set in motion, despite my impatience. So I follow the hostess, who leads me among the small circular tables toward one where a man is sitting by himself. I squint at him, trying to figure out if he really looks like Solas. Not so much: his face is thin enough but the features aren't right, and his skin has an odd greenish cast. I do my best to will his appearance into a better fit with my expectations, but this doesn't work. Oh well, appearances aren't everything. Maybe at least he'll identify as the character?

I sit down at the table and say, "Are you Solas?" He confirms that he is not. I don't remember our conversation clearly, but I recall being impressed with this DC's confidence and sense of his own identity. He seemed to find my questions foolish or nonsensical whenever I attempted to steer him toward my own ideas of how the scene should play out. For instance, when I asked something like "Are you from Thedas?" he replied emphatically, "I am from here." Still trying to keep up with the DA:I theme, I asked, "Is this the Fade?" I seem to recall he had an interesting answer to that, but I've unfortunately forgotten it.

At some point either I ask for his name or he volunteers it... and it is both odd and unfamiliar. I repeat what I think I've heard: "Vinyogi?" He shakes his head and says it again. This time I can make out that there are four syllables, with the emphasis on the second. "Zunvogayi?" I have to try several times before he's happy with my pronunciation, but it sounded something like that. I ask how to spell it, thinking this will help me remember it better, and he explains that the first syllable is spelled 'Zzn', but clarifies that the second 'z' functions as a 'u'. He gets up to leave and I follow, badgering him about how to spell the rest of it. He asks why I want to know, which I realize is a reasonable suspicion. I try to come up with an explanation that will sound bland and plausible without mentioning that I'm dreaming this, so I say something lame along the lines of, "I like to keep records of my activities."

Outside the cafe we head left down a path and then turn to the right, where some DCs are gathered looking at a long thin object resembling a small oar that is attached to a wall with a number on the paddle end. From their conversation I gather that it is a house number, and possibly they are trying to figure out if they should proceed with some kind of heist. Zznvogayi pulls out some cards and lays down four of them as though doing a divination. There are words and pictures on the cards, but they don't make sense to me. From what I can tell, the cards suggest that "if you have guts you get ice cream." I tentatively interpret that to mean that bravery will yield rewards... a favorable oracle? The DCs discuss the matter among themselves. Meanwhile I'm still pestering Zznvogayi to tell me how to spell the rest of his name, which he finally does. Of course it was just as complicated as the first syllable, and all I remember now is him explaining: "The 'v' and the 'd' are the same." "That makes sense," I reply, thinking how easily the two letters could merge based on linguistic similarity, and the fact that in some languages, like Sanskrit, they commonly occur in the compound phoneme 'dv'.

I want to make another attempt at summoning Solas, but this environment is too modern and urban to be suitable, so I decide to find somewhere better. Since there are a lot of DCs around I offer to make a show of it, announcing, "I'm going to make a portal!" Sure enough, this gets their attention and a small audience gathers behind me. I realize that with so many people watching I ought to give them a good visual spectacle. I begin by establishing, a few feet above the ground, a smudge of light colored deep cobalt blue. Then I wave my hand in a circle to rotate the light, spinning it into a flat vertical disk. I recall the beautiful hypnagogic patterns I was watching earlier as I fell asleep, and decorate the disk similarly. When I feel that the portal is well-established, I step through, trying to fix my thoughts on an environment appropriate to DA:I. However, at the spur of the moment I have trouble remembering any setting in particular, and for a while I find myself floating in unconstructed dream space. I focus on staying in the dream and finally a new environment forms around me. Across well-groomed lawns are large buildings whose style is unmistakably contemporary. There are no windows on the side wall of the building that I'm facing, just a four-digit number to identify it. This place looks like an expensive corporate campus: very far from what I was hoping for!

FA: It was probably the disappointment that woke me, but I had so much to write that I immediately went into "preserve and recall" mode, grabbing the notebook next to my bed and jotting down as many notes as I could before the memories faded, starting with the name 'Zznvogayi'. At one point I noticed that the pen wasn't making any marks on the paper, and remembered that earlier I had covered part of that page with an oval of wax. I tried to remember why and thought it must have had something to do with portals. I flipped over to a new page and continued taking notes, until I woke up more fully and realized that I was not actually writing, it had been an FA, and I would need to pick up my notebook for real and do it properly.

Recall: 2/10 upon waking, 5/10 after finding the thread. It was hard to remember anything at all when I first woke up, but I persisted until a few details came back, and that let me pin down a few detailed scenes at least. The overall plot remained vague. There were a lot of additional fragments from earlier sequences or prior dreams that I've left out.

I'm hanging out a woman who is at least a generation younger and we're getting dressed to go out. I have a vest in grey and black hues that swirl into one another in a cloud-like pattern, resembling the soft color variations of tie-dye, but subtle and not at all gaudy because of the dark colors. I'm wearing it over a thin long-sleeved, collarless knit shirt. I don't remember the color, maybe sort of mustard or yellow ochre. Then I try on a few pairs of pants to figure out which will match best. I decide on the dark grey corduroys but now I can't find them... where did I put them? I was just trying them on! I go through all the drawers of the dresser and they aren't here. Now I'm stuck wearing dark blue denim pants that don't match at all. I go into the next room and am relieved to find the cords on the bed... not sure how they got there since I didn't remember coming into this room, but I assume I was just spacing out and don't think to RC.

Some unclear sequences. The young woman and I go into town, and meet up with a third woman, who involves us in some kind of conspiracy. There is a fourth woman visiting town that she wants to engage in conversation under the pretext of just being friendly, but she has some more complex, sinister plan (that I don't remember in the slightest). We follow the visitor and after she ducks into a cafe, we follow suit. It has gotten cold and rainy out, so we pretend we've just stopped in for a hot drink. We hadn't intended to engage the visitor yet; the conspirator wants to do so but the young woman and I are afraid it will come across as too abrupt and awkward, so we are frantically trying to communicate across the table with our eyes and subtle shakes of the head that she should not go approach her. (The interior is small and no one else is here, so we can't speak aloud about our plans.)

The waitress comes over to see what we want to order. I see a drink named "Raksiteli" on the menu that I'm sure I remember having here before: I recall it is served hot in a tiny glass, tastes like honey mead but is strongly alcoholic. (I think the dream was merging "rkatsiteli," the name of a grape used for Eastern European amber wines, with "raki," a strong spirit that I did once try in a delicious honey-flavored version.) However, each glass was priced at $22, which seemed way too high! I remembered having four or five in a row last time... did I really pay that much? I thought maybe this time I should just get some coffee. I spent so long browsing the menu indecisively that I started to think I must be annoying everyone, so I told the waitress to get the orders of the other people at the table while I made up my mind.

Meanwhile, the cafe was filling up quickly with other people. The whole time I was inspecting the menu, I was also glancing up occasionally at the woman, the one we were targetting, sitting across the room at the bar. I thought it might help if I caught her eye a couple times, making it seem accidental, so that it wouldn't seem so random if we did decide to approach her. I was startled when she began walking over to us, but it turned out she was joining some people who had recently sat down at the table to our right. This worked out well, because overhearing their discussion (the tables were very close together) we made some comments and soon joined their conversation.

They were talking about apples for some reason—probably also deciding what to order—and I commented that I really don't like apples, especially cold from the refrigerator. "You should warm them up, then," said the woman sitting on the bench just to my right. I admitted sheepishly that the one way I do like apples was to hollow out the cores and fill them with butter and brown sugar, then bake them in the oven until wrinkled and brown on top. After I confessed my sweet tooth, the visiting woman, our target, now sitting across from me but at the next table, took a plate of whipped cream from their table and offered it to me. I couldn't tell if she was just being kind or if she suspected our plot and was getting ahead of it... might the cream be drugged? Was it intended to knock me out? But I thought it would look suspicious if I didn't accept some. I exchanged some silent glances with the people at my own table while we tried to assess her motives and decide what I should do. Without saying a word, we decided that I would try some of the cream, but that my companions would not, just in case the friendly gesture was something other than it seemed.

I used an online program to try to create the floorplan of the cafe. I didn't get the proportions quite right, so there should be four seats at the bar in the upper left corner, and two seats across from the wall benches at each of the small tables (allowing them to seat four people each), but this gives a general sense of the layout. I was sitting with the two other woman at the table on the bottom left side of the room, the younger woman to my left and the conspiratorial woman sitting in the chair across from us. The visiting woman was sitting at the bar at first, then moved to one of the chairs facing the table just to the right of ours, where two or three other people were initially sitting.

Unlike last night, where I know what went wrong, I don't know what didn't work last night. I did everything that consistently wins a lucid.

Something to do with me eating at this cafe. Somebody who was out to assassinate me fired a grenade launcher through the window. I yelled everyone to get down and dove away from the table. The grenade exploded.
I ran down the road into a suburban area and my assailant followed me. She was this shorter black girl with an army uniform. After running a few blocks, I looked back and saw that her grenade launcher had vanished. She looked confused. I came back after her to fight her in hand-to-hand combat but she vanished when I got closed.
...
Somehow connected to a dream where more people were out to kill me. I was purchasing a gun and the owner of the gun store was showing me how I should load the bullets with a little piece of toilet paper in-between. It's supposed to make the gun much more accurate.
...
Somehow connected to a dream about my parents when they were young and had first met.

I was semi lucid and I 'remembered' that I wanted to visit this record store that my friends were into. I remember crossing the road and there was this big group of fat guys wearing matching shirts who were apparently the band that the record store was known for.
When I got inside I saw that the entire store was empty 'cept for a cash register and a couple of racks of candy. The cashier was really cranky and told me that I wasn't a 'true fan' and that I should get out.

There was some full-on lucidity in here somewhere, but I can't recall what happened.

Well there is always tomorrow night...

Aboard a large ship, watching as massive wooden platforms raise and lower just above and below the ocean's water level. People are on the platforms, having paid a fee to get up close and personal with some giant whales. With a 30 foot wide mouth full of sharp teeth, I am happy I am not in the water with those beasts.

All of the whales are ignoring the platforms, just bumping up against them as they swim around eating tiny whale food. The platforms are huge, so even though the people are knocked over, they don't fall into the water. The wooden platforms are being kept at just about knee deep in the water, rising only when hit by a passing whale. It is some sort of specialty cafe for people who want that sort of thing.

Then I see one of the whales bite into a platform, and pull it out from under one guy. A few pieces of debris remain floating, and the guy scrambles onto another platform. All at once, the whales have turned hostile and are trying to eat all the platforms. Another guy is standing on some small bit of board, and jumps with it onto a bigger board that is stuck to a whale's back and rides it like a massive whale powered surf board. I don't see anyone getting devoured, but it still seems dangerous.

Now aboard a helicopter sent to rescue the people in the water, we dip low enough so that the bottom of the helicopter is submerged. I am underneath the helicopter, together with about four women who have been recently rescued. All of us hold our breath as we go under. For some reason, the helicopter has to do this in order to rescue more people. It flies higher for a bit, just long enough for us all to catch our breath. Just when we start to dip toward the water again, one girl tries to radio the pilot to let everyone know it's really hard to hold our breath for so long. But before she can say much, we are underwater again. This time, there is a board right under us, and a big air bubble has briefly formed, giving us a small window to breathe again.

Flying out from the sea, we land back on shore in part of a large military building from where the helicopters originated. We clean ourselves up and prepare to go give an interview with reporters. Some workers are cleaning the rooms. One of the rooms is mine. I go in to clean up my mess, and see a few people already at it, so I leave the work to them. I help the pilots secure their helicopters using a small electro-magnetic tool that just has to be pressed lightly against many trigger points. My dad is one of the pilots, and I want to help him out. I hear it doing something mechanical, but don't really know what. Finished with that, I walk down to make an appearance with everyone, but am stopped by a reporter and her daughter. The reporter is talking in Spanish and tells me she specializes in stories like mine. I get her to speak in English, and she writes down her address for me to contact her. With, "Guten Morgen" I wave goodbye to her.

WILD
I recognized a micro-awakening around 4-5AM, I stayed still and SP hit me fairly quickly, The dream created around me and I found myself in a large city, I noticed I had a womanly body and suddenly remembered Vulture, I morphed into her and decided to begin her story here, the name of this city was appearantly Maetropol.
I decided to take control just a tiny bit to advance the story somewhat, I went into a small alley (I envisioned a bounty hunter café there) I went inside, many bounty hunters were there, all with their unique style, I went up to the bartender and asked for a job, he just laughed at me and said "aren't you a little young kid?" after that I got pushed away by this hulking guy "Leave the bounties to the big guys" I jumped up and yelled in his face "Well, come at me then you incompotent gorilla" He didn't appreciate that remark, he pulled out a large mace and began to smash at me, demolishing some tables and the floor, I decided I had enoug and I went outside, he followed me furiously, I quickly punched the ground and surrounded my two fists with stone. I lunged at him and I had hit him right in the face, he got knocked back a few meters, I quickly fired off those stone gloves at him and he went through to the street where he got hit by a truck. I went back inside, everybody now treating me with respect, I remember a guy coming up to me and telling me I had done a good job, I went back to the counter and asked for my job, I got a discription of a man with brown hair and brown eyes, appearantly he overthrew an evil general not long ago, I'm usually for the good guys, but when I hear what my reward was I immidiately took the job, the reward was 500.000$, I wasn't planning on giving up on that many money. I suddenly felt the dream fade away, I prepared for DEILD right that moment.

.../It has been after some activity I cannot remember, when we all get out of a place and start walking. I don't remember how, but suddenly I'm sitting on the head of a giraffe walking on the streets. We are taking it somewhere. It's a bit vertiginous to maintain balance up here. I'm some meters above the ground, although the ride is nice. We get to the place we're supposed to let this giraffe, it gently puts me back on the ground. I notice we are carrying a baby giraffe too, but a little girl picks it up and accidentally opens its stomach with the zipper of her jacket. It kills the baby and we are all upset but cannot blame the girl. I get out of the room and there's a lot of sand out there. I see some cartoon-like mouses digging holes in the sand. One of them is older, they look like Ralph and Ed from the Honey-Mousers. I get back to the place we started, it looks like a cafe restaurant, there's a horny whore there. I like her but for some reason I cannot think of having sex with her, I just eventually touch and kiss her every time I can. She's hot like hell but apparently there's something that doesn't let me thinking of doing more. Then it's time to close the store, it's a friend's store and I go home carrying a broken padlock in my hand. I see how it is broken and play with it for a while/...

* Alarm clock wakes me up

This LD was the first of two from the morning of 9/17/2013.

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #147: Train Station Cafe

I'm in a wood-panelled room looking at some kind of device with Wife and a woman that I think is NyxCC. It's a small wooden box about the size of a cigar box with a mirror-like screen on it when you flip the lid open. There's a big window to our left with a view of an endless forest. After we're through looking at the device, we walk down a long hallway into an area that looks a bit like a train station. NyxCC and Wife are talking animatedly about types of art projects they both like to work on.

On our left is a busy cafe with walls made entirely of glass, and we step inside to find a table. NyxCC and Wife sit down at a table, leaning forward, elbows on the table, still talking about this art thing they're into. Before I sit down, I realize that I've forgotten something back in the room we just came from.

I turn to leave just as I notice that NyxCC's jaw looks thinner and longer than it did a moment ago. I think about this as I'm preparing to exit the cafeteria, trying to think whether Nyx looks different than she used to. The whole thing makes me think of lucid dreaming and a quick burst of critical thinking makes me lucid.

I turn back to look at the crowd, but Wife and Nyx have both vanished. I see one of our friends "LS" seated at a tall but narrow circular table nearby, but as I scan the crowd and return my eyes to this table, LS has turned into my four-year-old son "E", sitting by himself in some kind of boosted chair. I walk up to E's table and say, "Hey buddy, I'm dreaming."

"Uh-huh!" he responds, emphasizing the second syllable.

I grip the edge of the table with my hands, trying to draw out as much vividness as possible from the scene. My hands are a strange color, slightly pinkish. The table feels just like a cool, laminate table edge like you'd find in a fast food restaurant. I look up to see a waiter watching me, along with E.

I reach down and grab the table by its leg. "I want you to see what you can do in dreams," I say, pumping the table up and down over my head. "I can make it float away if I want to." For some reason, the ceiling is high above us, maybe a hundred feet up. The table floats upward for a while and then awkwardly disappears.

I look down to get one more glimpse of E and the water staring at me before I fall into the void. I rub my hands together then reach forward to see what's here. My hands land on what feels like the shoulders of a woman wearing a strapped dress. She's moving around a bit and seems like she might be trying to communicate or interact but none of it is getting through to me. I get a vague vision of her as a woman in her mid-30s with long brown hair, but before I can see her face, I wake up.

I arrive in Haven with the hopes of plotting against the Templars.
Although I have no new ideas on how to approach the situation, Silver might.

He joined us just a few days ago, because I put off asking him until then.
After attempting to make Ifrit join our cause, which failed quite dramatically,
I did not have the confidence to ask Silver.

Silver had done so much already, not to mention his horrible childhood.
He deserves to rest... to enjoy life a little. I shouldn't burden him with my issues.
But I ended up visiting him anyways, because I felt lost completely.
I'm not sure what I was expecting when Yuya and I got to the place he lives at now.
Talking to him again ended up being a little awkward. I wasn't really sure what to talk about.
Right as I managed to muster enough courage to address the topic of the Templars
I saw something that completely threw me off.
A woman entered the house holding a baby. She nodded at us and continued upstairs.
I realized Silver had a family now.
I made up an excuse to leave. I could never ask him to join us,
not after knowing Silver was finally at peace with himself.
But as we left he told us to hold on.
He ran upstairs and shortly after returned with his katana strapped to his back...
It turned out that he had read in my eyes that I needed his help.
I tried to talk him out of it but I failed.

So here he is now, standing in Yuya's garden next to a table, a place where we like to sit down
and discuss tactics. He is talking to Yuya and another person I don't think I have met.
Yuya's expression worries me quite a bit.

"What's wrong?"
"... It's about Vega."

Given the way she said it, something terrible must have happened there.
Vega is a small village which we often visit to go to a Café called Serenity.

It's situated on top of some sort of structure extending over the village.
An amazing place to stargaze whilst under the influence of some kind of psychedelic drug Vega is known for.

"What happened?"
"It's gone."

It is clear to me now that the other person with us is a messenger who informed her about the terrible news.
He tells us that I need to go and see. Yuya draws a portal and we enter it together with Silver.

The remains of Vega are in flames. They are small in numbers, they must have been burning for some time.
A man points towards Café Serenity, which still sits on top of the structure which appears to have withstood the fires.
He doesn't say anything though, he just walks away. Did he live in Vega?
We rush towards the Café, finding both of its owners outside.
Although the building still stands, it is heavily damaged and no longer in a usable state.
The owners tell me not to worry. That it is not my fault.
I enter the Café. Across the walls is written in burned wood:

"For as long as the dragon remains hidden, those that help protect him shall share his fate"

Templars... they've done this. Yuya hugs me in an attempt to console me.
They have killed these people because we are hiding from them. To show that if I do not reveal myself they will kill those that I know.

"They are right you know. This is not your fault..."
"Yet I feel guilty"

I know that she's right. I couldn't know that they were going to do this. And even if I did, what was I supposed to do, sacrifice myself?
The owners of this Café were honest when they told me that they do not consider this my fault.
They know who I am and what I have done. But somehow the fact that they do not consider me guilty makes me feel even worse.

One thing is clear to me now though. The goals of the Templars have indeed changed.
Back in the old days they were attacking other worlds in order to steal something I have long forgotten.
They did not know who I was, and it was me that got in their way because I wanted to protect these worlds.
But this time they are not after the belongings of worlds. They are after me specifically.
This is very odd, considering that Templars have no concept of campanionship.
Yes, I have indeed killed one of them a long time ago, but they would not hunt me in an attempt of vengance.
They know no such thing. They see each-other as assets, not as brothers in arms.
Until now I assumed that they are attempting a pre-emptive strike. So that I can not interfere with their goals again.
But in that case I would be a secondary objective, and I am clearly not.

That is exactly what the voices said...
Recently, when I slept in Haven, I would hear voices during my dreams.
They would whisper things suggesting that "they" were after me only. That it was because of time? And that I cannot surrender.
The messages were rather cryptic, and I didn't pay much attention because until now my dreams whilst in this realm have always been
very abstract and not really meaningful. But now that I think about them I get a feeling that they might help me find a way to deal with the Templars.
...
My hopes lie with abstract and cryptic dreams I had within a dream. That is how desperate I am.
No. It's worse actually. If the Templars were here it means they are on the right track.
Surely they were able to force someone into telling them that we are hiding on Teraluna.
It won't take them long to find that place, even though Haven is heavily shielded and we are masking our auras.

"They will find Teraluna..."

Both Yuya and Silver look at me rather depressed. I am the one who always comes up with the plans. They are relying on me for a strategy to save Teraluna... to beat the Templars once and for all.
And I've got nothing.

"Silver, knowing only the name of the moon, how long would it take you to find Teraluna?"

He's unreasonably good at finding things.
He sighs.

"The location of Teraluna is a rather well kept secret. The library is of great importance, protecting it is easier if its location is not known."
"Unfortunately there are many stories about it, some of which hint at its location."
"If I would try hard enough I'd probably find it in less than a week."

Less than a week? How am I supposed to do anything within that time frame?
And it's not like evacuating Haven and going into hiding somewhere else is a solution without removing the Templar thread.
They would manage to hunt some of the inhabitants down somehow.
Not to mention the library. It is of great importance, and they would burn it to the ground.
And then there are other things... even more crucial things.
Teraluna cannot fall.

The three of us combined aren't able to deal with a single Templar, yet there are 12 of them left.
Even if I had my dragon spirit and the phoenix essence back, it would be utterly hopeless.
And besides Ifrit I don't know anyone remotely as strong as us, yet I would need an army.
Perhaps death is catching up with me.

"Don't you dare even thinking about surrender."
"... I won't."

Silver is looking at me, probably expecting me to reveal some kind of backup plan I had all along.
Something insane enough that it might just work. I've got nothing.
In my desperation I recall the voices I heard in those dreams.
For some reason I reach out with my aura, attempting to locate anything that reminds me of these voices.
As I catch myself doing this I ponder about how ridiculous this is.
That's not how scanning for auras works. You need to at least be able to guess how it would feel like to be
in proximity of a person in order to find someone through aura tracking.
But for some reason that is beyound me, at that very moment, I do find something.
It doesn't feel like a person though, and the feeling is very weak.

If I wasn't hiding from the Templars, I could probably pin the location down near instantly.
But that would involve releasing an amount of energy that cannot be hidden.
The Templars who are actively scanning for my aura would find me immediately.
That goes for all of us. The templars know all of our auras.
But there is someone else I know, who is rather talented in aura tracking.
He might be able to help me find... whatever this is.

"Okay..."
"So I might have..."

Silver and Yuya open their eyes wide in hope.
Oh boy...

"Listen. This is a longshot... no, I wouldn't even call it a longshot."
"I have a lead alright. A lead to maybe find some sort of way to..."

They are euphoric. Are they not listening to my words? I don't have shit.

...
Fuck it. This is all I've got. If it turns out to be nothing then that's it.
They are relying on me.

"I need to visit an old friend to help me track someone down."
"Until I do, I won't be sure on how to approach the situation."
"I assume there will be a grand battle though, so prepare yourselves accordingly."

They both nod.

"I'll be back within less than three days."
"In case I should fail..."
"Bullshit! When you come back you'll have a plan."
"You always have a plan."

No pressure...

"We'll evacuate Haven in case we need to make a last stand."
"Yes."
"And I'll have my mother talk to Ifrit..."

Somehow I doubt that'll help.

"Hyu?"
"Yeah?"
"... Don't you die on me, alright?"

I smile.

"Working on it!"

That extinguishes the last worries in her facial expression.
I summon my phoenix wings.
Time to go annoy the hell out of an old friend of mine. Time to meet a talking bird.
I take off into the fabric of space.

NOTE: 100 countdown

Name: Banofun. Met with Robert in a cafe. I smoke M. Black inside the cafe and I worried. Then I saw others smoking as well. We're preparing for a show or a play. Reiji is there. We're designing flyers.

I am in a room. I am seeing through the eyes of a girl. A house. A room filled with bats. I need to get the gold nugget from a bat. They're hanging on the ceiling. I must not wake them up. They woke up and caused chaos. Back. Slowly went to the bat with the gold nugget. Below there's a plant Pokemon. Trying to avoid me? There's a Lickitongue sticking on the ceiling with its child.

Flying with plastic wings. Adjusting it to work properly. Not working properly.

Animorphs. Rachel. Fighting. A forest.

After having (or remembering) four dreams that night, I thought I could take advantage of the following, longer REM periods and try out the WILD technique. But eventually I got scared by the thought of sleep paralysis and directed my thoughts to something else – the film “The Avengers” – to calm down. And this affected my next dream.

#005 | Meeting Thor | In the city | Day | Long

“MOVE! Everyone, get out of my way!”
A loud voice brought me back from my daydream. I was sitting alone in a lively street café and just finishing my sundae, as Thor (or rather: Chris Hemsworth dressed as Thor and acting like him, too), passed by – looking rather displeased. A bunch of noisy people followed him, and they got more as the people from the café noticed this special guest, got excited or curious and approached him, too. Thor, being visibly annoyed by that and feeling very uncomfortable with the situation, pushed them out of his way harshly. For a second there, I smirked because I’ve had to admit I was slightly amused by that - but also very angry at this man for threatening these people so roughly. I stood up from my seat as Thor was coming near and at the moment he glared at me I gathered my courade to confront him.
“HEY!”
He stopped (as well as the crowd) and looked kind of puzzled for the source of this call. “I’m here.” I remarked. Thor gave me a confused look, followed by a displeased one. “What?! I don’t have time for your-“ - “You’re threatening these folks pretty gruffly.” You could hear some whispers in the crowd. I didn’t really know what to say and felt incredibly stupid, but I just had to do something. “What?” – “See… I get it, you’re some sort of celebrity, but that doesn’t give you the right of being rude.” He came near, and seeing his huge guise I tried to back away from him, but my curiosity held me fixed at the point I was standing. He lowered his voice. “Look, all I want is some peace and quiet. But now I can’t go anywhere… since even more people seem to recognize me every day.” He sounded frustrated. So he didn’t want any harm, he was just feeling uncomfortable, I thought. My precious little thing. I internally shook my head. Did I just call this enormous creature “my precious little thing”? Geez, being a fangirl and a normal person at the same time is hard. “Okay… I’ll count to three.” He didn’t seem to understand me. “One…” But I couldn’t explain it in front of the crowd. “Two…” He and the people looked tense, because no one knew what was going on with this weird girl starting to count loudly. “Three!”
I grabbed his hand and began to dash towards a sideway, which was located right next to the main street. The people must’ve thought we’re heading towards the latter and went that way as we escaped from them. After a short chase scene I stopped and waited quietly to see if anyone was still following us. No one did and I finally was able to relax, leaning on the wall and gasping for air. Thor seemed to be completely fine and asked me if I was okay. “Me? Yeah, I’m fine. I’m fine…” He smiled and thanked me. After catching my breath I asked him what he was doing here (on earth). He replied that he wanted to look after the humans and the earth, but eventually got caught up in a whirlwind of activity, since a lot of people started to recognize and pursue him. I chuckled and told him that it’s because of a new piece of art called movie which tells the people a bit of the story surrounding him and Loki, his brother. “People enjoy this piece of art and talk about it, so they recognize you right away and want to talk to you out of admiration, I think.” – “Ah, I see…” He looked somewhat gloomy. “You were right. I was really inconsiderate.” I snickered and told him that it’s alright, and that they’ve probably already forgiven him. Then I invited him to go for a stroll down a more tranquil road.

Aaand~ I forgot what happened after that, again. In my DJ notes I speak of “classmates who are standing on the pavement and making fun of Thor”, an “adventure”, “Thor cleaning his hands with my sleeves”, the number “105” and “me and [one of my best IRL friends] gaining a lot of EXP”. If I can eventually make out what happened, I will edit this DJ entry.

Oh! I just remembered another scene. My classmates thanked me, my clothes were quite dirty and one of my friends (whom I look up to) dragged me to the side and praised me. She told me I proved to be a really great person and that everyone should be proud of me for doing what I did.
That was, or still is, such a nice dream memory! (Especially since I don’t have a lot of self-confidence and this boosted it. Kind of.) Plus, it gave me an example for how dreams can affect the attitude and thoughts of a person positively.
(But now I really want to know what I've done...)

1: "Lucid" (non-lucid) dream, trapped in a dream X The Hunger Games influenced set up
First, I'm having a "lucid" dream, where I am not lucid at all, it is just my subconscious mind tricking me into believing. I do what it is most likely I would have done during a lucid. I am standing in front of a double window, I smash it with my hand and leap out of there. In the dream, I am thinking of unfurling my wings, and call for Warren from X-MEN to learn me how to fly. But, then of course, I fall down, thinking this won't work. And then I start strolling down the street, towards a nice red-brown cafe at the corner of the street. It has wooden panels and glass plate-windows.
I "wake" up.
I am in my bed, laying up at night, hoping for a lucid dream again. My room is almost pitch black, but I can still see. The contrasts are unusually bright, all I can see is bright white light crashing with black shadows.
I am afraid, curled up on my bed, waiting to fall asleep into the lucid-world.
There is a storm, and it is raging inside my room. Things are flying uncontrollably around, the computer screen on a desk in the middle of my room blows open, showing bright lights off into the darkness and the curtains on the left side of my second window is pushed aside, reveling a bright white glow from outside my window. It is like a nightmare. I can't fall asleep. I am afraid someone scary and nightmare-ish will enter the stage.
After a while, a woman enters the room, after a while. The storm quiets, and she has a flock of other teens following her. I think she represents Anne, from Maximum Ride: School's out forever. (currently reading)
She takes the computer away and we leave the room. Then we walk down a hall and she has a safe atmosphere surrounding her.
Next, I am in a lucid dream again. I count my fingers and all, and have an unusual amount of them (ten once! New record) but I don't become lucid as it is part of the dream that I will become "lucid" and take "lucid" choices.
And now I am in the cafe. There are mainly girls there, laughing and everything. There is one waiter and he is a blonde man. I went over to talk to him, as all the others in the cafe was busily talking to each other.
Just as we enter a conversation, I don't remember much what we said, he crumples into this; http://www.mommyniri.com/wp-content/...lectionRex.jpg , and turns black-white.
A teacher from my school (IRL he is a copy of the headhunter-principal from School (the normal kind) in Maximum Ride: School's out forever.)
He tells me he that he have had enough of this nonsense, switching in and out of dreams and reality, and falling asleep all the time.
And I understood that he was in control of the dream from now on.
And he's trapping us (me and some other children that goes to my school, on my age) in a dream.
The next thing I remember is being inside a P.E. -ish hall, in half the size. At the left side, there is benches and carpets spread along the floor. And on the right side, kinda backstage-ish there is hung an green overhang and behind there is spread different weapons and sticks - knifes, bows and arrows, maybe ropes, sharp metal.
Me and E. trots over to the weapons, along with some other kids. The rest hurries to the benches.
I realize that I might need something to defend myself with, and perhaps my territory.
I tell E. he might need a bow. I already have one, from before (somehow). When the place is cleared for weapons, I have taken a knife and some arrows, I do an overlook and find an extra set of arrows for my bow.
When I round the overhang, I see that people have already gathered in groups, survival-team-ish, behind gathered benches. Making their own territories and improvised fortresses. I join a group that welcomed me warmly, as I had belonged with them from the start. That is my only way of saying it.
Kim is there. I think. And E. And some more, I didn't really notice. In the dream, it was people I trusted and that would manage.
People had gathered carpets to cover up their flipped over benches. I helped my team set up what they had, and copied a team on the opposite corner of ours.
The mad (mad. As in ko-ko) teacher was watching us.
I don't know if I was getting ready to aim my bow at somebody.

The End.

sun January 7th 2012
0:00-9:00

Same thing as last night: no experiments, need sleep. Breathing & mantras.

1. I'm driving with my dad and my brother in a car. I'm not allowed to drive irl yet. My mom follows us on a scooter. I kinda suck at it: keep forgetting to cross intersections from the right lane, not using my turn signals. I also drove into a school, which was like a maze that I couldn't get out from. My biggest fear is that I won't be able to brake, because the pedal feels very hard, like I don't have enough strength to use it's full potential. I've had this dream 3-4 times now, this is the first time it got messy. I always take the same road, but this time I derailed from it.

2. Can only remember fragments from this dream. It's located in a cafe, especially in a room on the second floor with a balcony. Again I'm not sure what part I play. There is a tall woman, she's probably the waitress. There is an older lady (she must be the owner). There are two guys (they must be the ones running the bar for the older lady), the younger one is more handsome - he's the one the girl is interested in. The guys leave for some time and when they get back in their American-type convertible, they enter through the backdoor. It's a black steel plate with a white painting on it: like a ghost or a witch. Upon return they discover that the younger woman had a child. The kid is in a buggy on the balcony. The woman died her hair to a dark color (I'm not sure how it was before, though). She's pleading the younger fella to have another kid with her. He tells her this bar is no place for a child. She points out that her current child is just fine here (the one on the balcony, with a ridiculous name I can't remember: something like Butter or Sunflower).

Note to self: STAY IN BED. SAY: "WHAT DID I JUST DREAM?"