false awakening

First Lucid
This is the first ever lucid dream that I remember having, I was about 15 or 16 years old and didn't know anything about lucid dreaming.

I was walking around my grandma's house and something felt weird to me... I wondered what it was and then it came to my mind, "is this a dream?" Then I realized the absurdity of my question and instantly replied, "well of course not, I am controlling what I'm doing...". I thought, "wow I must be really high or something then..."

Then I looked myself in the living room's mirror and realized it was indeed a dream, "this is a dream!" and then out of nowhere my face turned into the face of a cat and I woke up instantly startled.

First False Awakenings
I remember I got tons of this while I was at school all the way to high school. A lot of time when I was supposed to wake up, I stayed in bed for a few more minutes because I am lazy... Then finally I wake up to put on my uniform and all that... then later realizing that I haven't woken up at all. I got a lot of this and I was always fascinated by this phenomenon.

I have had some pretty bizarre dreams before involving dreams within dreams. This one was so bizarre that I knew I had to come back to this site to discuss it. To begin, I want to mention that I had this dream after waking up and then sleeping in today, saturday, which is how I usually am able to Lucid Dream.

The dream began with me at my school and I was watching a horror movie on the TV. It was extremely realistic except for the fact that the lights were off and I was laying on the ground on my side. I then had a false awakening, and in the dream I was in my bed on my laptop. Usually when I pull out my phone in a dream, I just see a multicolored screen and never am I able to actually look things up on the internet. At most there will be a video playing that I then find myself becoming a part of.

However, this time I was actually handling my laptop and looking at videos on Youtube. I remember one of the videos was about albino ostriches and a variety of facial expressions that they make. I then dreamed that I was practicing WILD, and tried to control what I was dreaming but ended up dreaming that I was still in my room, only I wasn't sure if I was dreaming or sleepwalking. This is actually a common theme in my dreams due to how detailed they can really be when I am lucid, I know I am dreaming but still worry if I am sleepwalking. I was outside my house and fell down on my front lawn. I then had a faulse awakening again and was back to being in bed with my laptop. The laptop then fell over and broke the screen, and I had a second false awakening to find the laptop fixed again.

I went back to sleep in the dream and this time was near my neighborhood, only as usual in dreams familiar places become bizarre and twisted. I came across a large mansion which I somehow knew was my cousin's house. (To clarify my cousins do NOT live in a large mansion.) As I was approaching the house, a car pulled up behind me and a man got out and started shooting a gun at me. I ducked and was able to actually hide behind the sidewalk curb, which was now a few feet high. I then again had another false awakening, and this time in the dream I was on my laptop writing a dream journal about all of what had happened so far.

The last dream was so realistic though that I couldn't believe how detailed it really was. Usually when you are reading a book or something, it will change. This time it remained constant. I was in a classroom, for reference it looked like one of the classrooms from my elementry school, and the teacher was a man who was teaching us about the occult. I remember him wearing a blue vest with a shirt underneath with the sleeve rolled up, and him being rather muscular. He handed out these printouts that were stapled together, like an activity book but each page was related to monsters and demons.

I remember I was just looking through the booklet while the girl across from me was almost done, and I looked at her completed booklet to try to figure out what I was supposed to be doing. She commented that I should be glad I didn't reach near the end of the assignment where you have to draw various demons and symbols for their summoning. I page I looked at showed a monster destroying a city, and had instructions to draw a skyscraper in it's hand.

A man who somewhat looked like the tenth doctor (Doctor Who.) started questioning out teacher about his background and how he had a history of controversy with his teaching methods, and how he was in danger of losing his teaching license.

This was one of the most powerfully frightening and sleep episodes to date.

I'm floating in a sensory deprivation tank. I chose to do an hour and a half session since it had been a long day. This experience happened in the later half of the float.


I'm listening to music. It's sort of a slow, funky R&B beat with a man singing directly to me. He has a wonderful, deep voice that sent me deeper into my comfort zone. I realize quickly that this isn't the wake up music for my session, it is all in my head. I smile, or at least I think I do, and continue listening for a whole, beautiful minute. It's amazing what your mind can create in sensory deprivation.

The music fades and a twitch brings me back to present. "That was wonderful," I thought. "That's more than enough to write about."

Reflecting back on all this, I now know I experienced a false awakening, and a very convincing one at that. So, in my false awakening:

I'm going to flip onto my stomach for the last 30 seconds of my float (sometimes when I know I'm about to get out of the tank, I lay face down for as long as I can hold my breath. It feels good on my back). My extremities feel numb, but I manage to flip over. I soon realize I'm paralyzed. I have no control over my legs or arms and worst of all, my face is under water. I begin to panic. A hot rush of survival fear rushes me through my situation. My mouth is muffled by water and my arms can't find their way to bang on the wall for help. I'm going to die. I hold my breath as long as I can until I realize there is no use fighting it anymore. I have to inhale. I choose not to have my life flash before my eyes, since I knew inhaling the super saturated salt water would burn out any sentiment I could gather, so I just decided to go for it. A moment of courage. With all my strength, I take a mighty breath. Farewell.

Woosh. I'm back in my real body, frantically trying to catch my breath and calm my nerves. I knew exactly what had happened, having experienced false awakenings and sleep paralysis before. Never have both happened simultaneously. I was rattled, I still am.

I accepted death. Rather than inhaling the salt water, I took the most refreshing gasp I've ever tasted. It was beautifully humbling experience.

Dream - Lucid

I was in some video game when I became lucid. The lucidity lasted for a bit, but all I can remember from it was asking a Nicholas Cage,
"Tell me who you really are!"
He looked at me with a straight face, and responded with something like
"You don't want to know."
We talked some more, but I started to feel like I was talking out loud in my sleep.

I then woke up in another dream, laying on a pull-out couch. I asked whoever else was there, I think it was my brother, if I had been talking in my sleep. He said he didn't hear anything.

~

I was at work in the bakery, but, as usual, it looked nothing like the bakery does IWL. We were by a checkout counter. Someone asked me if I would mix the dough. I told them no, I wouldn't, it was too scary. The reason I said that it was scary was because when someone went to mix the dough, they had to go to a different part of the store. They had to travel through dark, creepy, cave/maze-like areas with enemies that would shoot you. You had to be armed and shoot them before they killed you. It was kind of like Doom/Goldeneye 64. The area where you mixed was also threatened by enemies. I told them that last time I did it, I was sitting down, trying not to fall asleep with my shotgun because enemies kept coming. I "remembered" this happening. I didn't want to go through that again. I preferred the safety of the bakery. There was a guy there who had been doing it every day. He held his own pretty well and was much more of an expert on it than me.

My manager then tried to toss me some frozen dough to take to the mixer. I don't remember what I did or said.

I then was really close to an enemy, an archer who slightly resembled King Graham from the Kings Quest games. His back was turned to me. I was trying to sneak up on him and throw him in the lava. I was being quiet, until I made a small noise. He heard it and turned around. We fought a little, but I don't remember much about it.

I then was going through the dark area for some reason. I had the guy in front of me who went all the time. I was shooting at enemies with a laser. I then started to get shot at, and my laser stopped working, so I turned around and ran the other way to get out of the enemy's sight. I looked down at my laser, and it was a Wiimote. When I'd fire it with the A button, the light on the Wiimote would turn red, signaling to me that I was too far away from a Wii for it to work. As I was turning a corner, a bullet grazed me, and it really hurt! That too was part of the reason I didn't like doing the dough; it hurt when you got hit, though if you died, you'd respawn.

I then saw this open part of the maze to the dough. It was very dark there. There were people there with different colored lights all down the middle of the room to direct us where to go. They also had to defend themselves from the enemies. I saw a top view of this room, and then I was at the beginning of the room. I didn't go to far into the room. I also saw, at some point, a view of a room from some stairs.

I then was at the checkout again. Someone came and asked if they had different dough runners, and they said yes. I then saw a shelf with bowls of dough on it for each day of the week, each with a different name on it. I really hoped my name wasn't up there. I looked, and didn't see it. I was, for some reason, a little disappointed, even though I didn't really want to do it.

~

I was at what was supposed to be my house, but it looked nothing like it. I kept thinking about the weed I had from a while ago that was in the top drawer of this white three drawer organizer I have. I kept thinking about when I was going to smoke it. I was then in my room, which looked like the room of my first apartment. I opened the drawer, and the bag was in there with some weed in it. I "remembered" when I bought it. I had recently smoked, maybe a few weeks prior, so my sobriety was already blown. I didn't want to smoke it inside though because it would smell like weed, and my roommates might not appreciate it. I then thought about how this woman who was living there, an older woman, liked weed, and wondered if I should ask her to smoke with me. She was there currently, the only other one home but me. I didn't ask her.

I then briefly woke up, still half in the dream world, thinking that I didn't really have any leftover weed. As I eased back into the dream world, I thought that of course I did. I went and checked again, and there it was.

Then, there was this tall, young black man in our kitchen. He had a Jamaican accent. He was yelling at us about something that we did wrong. It had something to do with work. He was mostly getting mad at two of my roommates who weren't there currently. He was yelling more and more, when finally, I had had enough and chimed in.
"Shut up! Shut the fuck up!"
I continued to yell at him, saying other things, throwing around a lot of profanities. He kept yelling also. There was one point where I was standing on a chair in front of him. I grabbed his face in my hands, which somehow corresponded to a TV screen, like this was being recorded or something, and told him that the roommates (who were an FFX character, Lulu, and someone I knew it college) were my friends, and he needed to leave them alone. The chair almost fell backwards at one point. I figured I'd probably get in trouble for this, but I didn't care; this guy was insulting people I loved. I also kept thinking that now since I was so mad I was definitely gonna smoke that weed that day.

The guy turned around and left, and I was now in the kitchen with Adam, the guy from college who was apparently my roommate, and one of the people the Jamaican man was yelling about. He was doing something by the stove. He was wearing a glittery brown plaid hat. I told him what happened. I then told him I loved his hat.
"It's so..." I started to say, when he interrupted and said
"Gay?" (IWL he is gay)
"You just wear it well!" I said.
"Thank you," he said.

~

It's interesting how after not smoking for almost two years I am still having these dreams about smoking. I guess it was such a huge influence in my life for so long, and well, it's an addiction that I've been battling for 5 years now. I guess the dreams just come with the territory.

I was at a martial arts class, not the martial arts class that I usually go to, and then I walked outside it was like Pittsburgh, and I saw Han Mi Martial arts (my martial arts school) doing a demo, and I told them I would have come, but they said it was just for advanced students not beginners so they didn't tell me. Then I crawled in through a net and tried to pull my way through, and Han Mi Martial arts said it was bad and I shouldnt and they would tell me later. I ended up in a large cafeteria and I realized I was dreaming. I ate a bar (dream food) and walked around looking for lemonade. I closed my eyes and opened them to test if I was dreaming or awake. Nothing happened and I decided I would probably stay asleep, so I walked around didn't find the lemonade, and then I woke up.

Earlier in the night, I had a false wake up, and I was in a large bedroom with a window and a door to outside. It wasn't my bedroom and I thought Im dreaming, I might be, but I doubted myself and was too afraid to go outside, and then I slipped into a different dream that I forget now.

Another dream I had last night was I walked to a high school to apply to be a creative writing teacher. The principal in the office told me that he had a spot for a teachers' aid but then the devil posessed me and I did something crazy and blacked out and then the principal told me what happened and told me to leave. I said but I want to be a creative writing teacher but they told me to leave.

9/17/14

7:15 am DILD

I was having a dream about fighting space creatures like in Gantz when I woke up from it into a false awakening. I tried turning on the light and it didn't work. That's when I realized I was dreaming and became lucid. My window shade was gon and I could see outdoors into the wilderness. I walked through the window. Everything was so crisp and vivid. Then I saw big foot. I was scared so I said こんにちは, "hello" in Japanese, to assure myself and it said こんにちは back. It was walking away from me and I followed it. Then it faced me. I was so scared that it wold turn me into a werewolf or eat me, so I shoved it on the ground. I felt guilty, but was still scared, so I woke up.

Dream
Lucidity
False Awakening

I woke up on a bed because I could hear the sound of a heavy breeze coming through an open window. The breeze sent printed pictures under the closed door to the outside of the room. I knew the breeze was telling me to go out of the room. I wondered why but all I wanted to do was go back to sleep. A powerful man's voice kept telling me I was dreaming, and that I had to go look at one of the rooms. I replied "I can't go back to the dream, it's already too late, I'm already awake." The voice replied, "You are in a dream; look at your watch," upon doing so, I realized that my watch looked normal except for the area where the date is shown was blank. I realized I was dreaming!
I calmed myself and stabilized the dream. The voice told me "Someone is waiting for you at the open door" I went out the room and down the hallway to the left. As I passed the open doors, they shut by themselves. In the third or fourth door, I saw some sort of cat run out the room. I tried talking to it but couldn't speak. I reached the end of the hallway, which opened up into a small room with an open window and very big vans outside. I turned around and saw an open door. The place was dark and I said "Light!", which made a flash of light appear. The area lit up for a few seconds. I entered a room with an open door. The room itself was a little dirty and dark. I noticed two beds and said "Light!", making the flash of light appear again. I saw a woman on one of the beds, which startled me. I walked towards what I saw was an older woman, around 50, wrinkles, but attractive, skinny and a darkish skin tone. We made introductions and she told me her name was Lisa, but that I could call her whatever I wanted. She was very vibrant and outgoing and she told me she was what I refer to as a 'Dream Guide'.
We chatted for a while and I eventually asked what the water in most of my dreams represented. She went on a long explanation about her being in prison and her being a native, and about a bear or something. I don't remember. I then asked her if the way I was woken up, with the wind, had any meaning. She smiled and said no. She started looking a lot older and my dream got blurry. I lost awareness and as I was waking up, Lisa told me I looked good at the grocery store.

Ritual: WTB 1am, woke 4:20am, got up and read, drank spice lassi (yogurt, water, turmeric, cumin, salt), did 12 minutes seated meditation incorporation SSILD technique before returning to bed at 5:50am. Before going to bed I affirmed several times, "I vow to lucid dream," reflecting on how a vow is much more serious than an intention, a little nervous that I might inadvertantly break my vow, but reminding myself that I didn't dare, failing to go through on an intention is one thing, but you're never supposed to break your vows. I wanted to avoid supplements for the most part as that hasn't helped much lately, but I did use a few drops of Calea Zacatechichi tincture, because although I can't say for sure if it actually works, I thought the distinctive taste might contribute a useful placebo effect. I lay on my back in bed and did a series of tension-relaxation exercises, then cycled in random order through several affirmations ("I am aware / I do / I dream"). Drifted off, woke up a little, realized it was getting too bright out and my mind felt sufficiently wakeful that this might be an obstacle to sleep, so I put on my sleep mask (a device of last resort as I don't like wearing it), turned on my left side, and continued the affirmations until I fell asleep. I got a lot of distinct hypnagogic imagery and sounds every time I started to drift off, but I did not feel the physical signs of transition.

WILD, Part 1: I woke up again, thinking I might have transitioned successfully, and got out of bed. I could still distinctly feel myself wearing the sleep mask so I wondered if I was really dreaming, but realized that since it wasn't obstructing my vision, then I must be. I was tempted to rip off the mask but decided to just ignore it, and soon the sensations disappeared for the duration of the dream. Now that I was sure I was dreaming, I wanted to get started right away on my tasks. I reached behind me for my wand, a gesture familiar from a few years ago when I had been playing a lot with Harry Potter style magic. I got used the idea that my wand was sheathed just behind my right hip, so I could just reach back there at any time to draw it. However, this time I came up empty-handed. I realized that this was probably because, having just gotten out of bed, I wasn't wearing any clothes. Nevermind, I can work on that task later. By this time I'm in the kitchen, so it should be an easy matter to procure some fortune cookies!

I walk toward the kitchen counter, expecting to find a bag of fortune cookies ready to hand. Sure enough, there is a clear plastic bag right where I expect, but as I reach for it I see that it contains... what are those, pierogies? I laugh because they look almost like fortune cookies and are anything but, and it is just like dream to bait and switch this way. I pick up the bag and reach into it anyway, focusing my expectations around pulling out a proper fortune cookie, and by the time my hand closes around something, I can tell that it is falling into line: it has the dry smooth surface, distinctive shape and ridges of a fortune cookie. I pull it out and break it in half to get the fortune. I remember that I'm supposed to eat the cookie too, so I start nibbling at it while extracting the fortune, which was wedged inside the cookie in a crumpled up wad. As I smooth it, I see that the little strip of paper is covered with what looks like dabs of herb butter mixed with little shreds of nori seaweed, a kind of east-west fusion of ingredients. I'm disappointed to see that there is no writing on the paper at all, just the seasonings.

No problem, the bag contains several cookies. I'll just get another. I try again, and fortunately the next cookie contains a larger slip of paper, one that comes out properly this time and contains actual text—quite a lot of text actually, four or five lines of it. I start to read it, murmuring aloud to help fix it in memory. It starts something like: "And earth her allies rift..." It goes on from there, not making much sense, and worse, by the time I get to the second line the first one is already changing, now "her allies" looks like it has been replaced by something in German, "die Beile."

(Weird, according to my German dictionary app "die Beile" means "axes, hatchets." I've studied a bit of German, which is why I have the app, but I'm not aware that I've ever learned that word and didn't even know if it was a real one until I looked it up.)

I continue reading the fortune, and by the time I get to the end the first line has changed again even more, and I'm pretty sure so has everything else. I realize this is somewhat hopeless, the fortune was so long that it would have been hard enough to remember even if it were static, much less track all the changes, so I just determine to remember the part that I read initially, since I think I can keep at least this much in working memory: "And earth her allies rift."

By this point the fortune has transformed into a large plastic wrapper like the sort that might have wrapped a whole box of cookies, and as I continue to look at it, I'm surprised by how much additional text is written on the side in small print: mundane details like the address of the manufacturer, etc. I see a date, "1945," and note that the place of manufacture is San Francisco, which makes sense (wasn't the fortune cookie invented there?) but by now the date has already changed to "1929."

FA: Around this time I wake up and grab the notebook I keep next to the bed to start writing things down. Something's wrong, though: even though I normally open it to a blank page before sleeping, it is now open to a page wholly printed with graphics resembling some type of manga. I don't remember the notebook having graphics! I flip through to find a blank page quickly while my memories are fresh, but all the white pages are already filled with previous notes, and they are interspersed with the manga pages, like a cross between a notebook and a graphic novel. I find a space of blank color on one of the manga images, just enough room to scribble, "and earth her allies rift," but then I feel guilty about spoiling the drawing. I don't even remember what the story is, but if I write all over it I might end up regretting it.

While I'm still trying to figure out where to put down the rest of my notes, my husband comes into the room carrying two boxes wrapped in paper, like presents. Apparently this is some new game that has just arrived that he wants to play together, a console game. I remember him telling me about it earlier: the plot has something to do with cartoonish kids and their gorilla allies. It seems that the game can only be played in two-person mode, so he has come in to try to wake me up. I'm still lying in bed, so he sets the two boxes down right on top of me and starts to rip off the paper wrapping. The boxes are cubes measuring about a foot on each side, and at first I wonder why they are so large, but as he tears off the paper I can see from the box art that they contain individual devices like Playstation controllers.

Although I do want to play the game at some point, I'm annoyed at this disruption because I was in the middle of a lucid dream attempt! After jotting down my notes I had been planning to try to re-enter the dream state. However, I already vaguely suspect that this might not be a real awakening because everything seems so exaggerated, from the problems with my notebook to my husband's rude attempt to wake me. He may not share my hobby, but he's aware of it, and would be unlikely to disturb me while I'm still sleeping, much less set boxes on me! This remains only a suspicion, and I don't become fully aware of the fact that I'm still dreaming. Rather, I conclude only that I'm still on the verge of it, since I can still feel the heaviness and tingling in my limbs that lets me know that I can probably re-enter the dreamstate once this distraction has diminished. So I quietly grumble at my husband until he leaves, careful to keep calm and not lose my temper since that could wake me up too much and make it impossible to to return to the dream. After he goes out of the room, I get myself settled in the bed again and prepare to re-transition. This is amusing in retrospect because evidently I was fully dreaming the whole time—I had the impression that I was DEILDing back into the dream, but obviously if this had been a real awakening DEILD would have been impossible after such a chaotic interlude! When I felt confident I was dreaming again, I got back out of bed.

WILD, Part 2: Having done fortune cookies, I thought I should put all my focus now into completing the Patronus TOTM. Once more I reach for my wand and once again come up empty-handed. No matter, I've used a chopstick as a wand before with great success, and I keep a jar of those right on the kitchen counter, so I walk up to it and pluck a nice sturdy one. Although the jar is mostly full of delicately-pointed Japanese chopsticks, I choose a sturdier one of the Chinese type, cut half-square and half-round. It looks just like one of my real chopsticks, from a simple and practical set I acquired many years ago in Nonthaburi because I didn't know I was supposed to give them back to the door-to-door noodle vendor, and it feels comfortable and familiar in my hand.

I figure that it would be most appropriate to summon a Patronus if there were a real threat, but I don't want to over-complicate things by going to look for one. I reason that since my husband was annoying me just now with the boxes and almost woke me up, this could serve as a sufficient stand-in. So I find him in the living room, point the wand toward him and say firmly, "Expecto Patronum!" I hear an audible "pop" like something bursting but see no change in the visual field. I try again and nothing happens at all. I strengthen my resolve, try a third time, and... what is that?... I look closer... it's... moths! The air between us where I was aiming the wand is now occupied with a cloud of small shimmering moths!

I'm delighted with these results because they were so unexpected. I figured my Patronus would turn out to be something predictable like a type of animal I like, maybe a cat or an owl or a raven or even a horse, but moths had never crossed my mind! However, I had intentionally left the form of the Patronus unspecified, because I was hoping the dream would collaborate with me creatively and come up with something interesting and unanticipated, and in this respect it fulfilled its role splendidly.

Moths! I would never have consciously arrived at this solution, but now it makes perfect sense: I am very much a night person, after all, and these are definitely night moths. I watch them for a few moments, entranced by the glitter and sparkle of their silver bodies in flight. They are relatively small, with wingspans of roughly three-quarters of an inch, but there is a whole cloud of them, many dozens filling an area several feet on either side. Although we are indoors, they appear to be illuminated by moonlight. It is incredibly beautiful. And they've fulfilled the function of a Patronus, it seems, in that they have averted the "threat" (such as it was) and completely defused the tension in the room. My husband is watching them too, and appears just as enchanted with them as I am.

After admiring the moths for a while, I notice a rabbit on the living room floor. It is wonderfully well-articulated, closely resembling Dürer's famous drawing of a hare. (Probably WLR because I briefly saw that drawing yesterday.) Since I'm still holding the wand, I figure I might as well try out another HP spell. I recall that there's one that ends with "leviosa," and although I can't remember the first word, I figure it is unimportant because clearly "leviosa" is the operative term. So I point the wand at the hare and say, "Leviosa!" Sure enough, it rises right off the ground into the air. I set it back down and pet it fondly.

I now feel satisfied that I have accomplished both the tasks I had intended, and I know I should wake up now and write promptly before I forget any details. But the dream is going so well, so clear and stable and responsive... it would be a shame to leave it so soon... I give in to the temptation to take a quick look outside, just for a minute, before coming back in to wake up and begin my report.

Walking back through the kitchen, I open the screen door to the back patio. Sometimes my WILDs become more unstable after I leave the house, probably in large part because I've developed the expectation that this can happen, but in this case I plan to wake up soon anyway, so I walk outside without hesitation.

It only takes a step or two before the environment no longer resembles my backyard. I encounter a group of four DCs, a mix of men and women who appear to be in their twenties. They begin to approach or accost me in a vaguely threatening manner. I try the Patronus charm again, but it is not as effective this time: the cloud of moths is much smaller and the DCs appear unimpressed. I'm not sure if I actually see them holding wands, or only rationalize that they might be, but I figure this would be the perfect opportunity to try another HP spell. "Expelliamus!" I shout, aiming at the guy on the far left. Sure enough, his wand jumps right out of his hand toward me, and I catch it neatly. You'd think this would give the others enough warning to prepare their defenses, and indeed they seem to be scrambling to try, but I promptly disarm them all using the same technique.

I walk on a little further, and encounter a few more DCs sitting on a low brick wall and chatting. The initial four have followed me, and I get the impression that the new ones are their friends. I wonder if they are going to retaliate at me for having taken all their wands, so try the Patronus charm yet again: "Expecto Patronum!" This time only a scattering of moths appear, a half dozen or less. I feel a bit embarrassed at this poor showing. "It must be out," I muse, wondering if the wand can only conjure a limited number of moths in a given interval.

Nevermind, I've got more tricks in my arsenal, and I want to intimidate these DCs so they'll back off. I wonder if I can levitate the whole group of people? "Leviosa!" I command, trying to make them all rise in the air at once. It doesn't work, and I speculate that maybe this is like game mechanics, where it is easier to perform such effects on simple creatures like animals, but harder on a more intelligent creature like a person, since they get a free roll to resist. I think it over and decide, well, maybe so, but... I have all the wands! Their combined power should be enough to counter any resistance. Is it possible to use more than one wand simultaneously to cast a spell? Only one way to find out!

Standing in the center of the DCs, who form a ring around me, I levitate myself initially—partly to cement the idea of levitation more firmly in mind, and partly because some of them look like they might want to make a grab at me at any minute. Hovering in the air just above them, I arrange all the wands together in my right hand so that I am gripping them evenly, and try again: "Leviosa!" This time I am pleased to see the whole circle of people around me—about six or seven now I think, the initial group plus their friends—rise simultaneously several feet into the air until they are almost even with my own level. They all look discomfited and alarmed by this change of circumstances, so to reassure them that I mean no real harm I let them sink gently back down to the ground and come down as well myself, satisfied with the results of my experiment.

I decide to stop fooling around now and go back into the house to write my report. It seems dream logic has made me forget that I can just wake up whenever I want to, I don't actually have to go back bodily into the house and manually start writing. But as I turn to go, one of the girls who has returned to her seat on the brick wall yells something hostile and sarcastic after me. I figure she's upset over my levitation stunt, so I decide to use friendliness to try to transform her attitude. I walk right up to her and, maybe taking "friendliness" a little too far, kiss her on the lips. Although she just looks startled and confused now, I smile warmly and say with genuine affection, "See you later!"

Returning to what I think must be the spot where I came out of the building, I go back inside. Just in case the DCs are still feeling miffed and try to follow me in, I lock and bolt the heavy door behind me. This is no longer the sliding screen door to my kitchen, but a large and solidly made wooden door with numerous locking mechanisms. I'm not sure if I came in the right door at all, because when I turn around I see that I'm in what looks like a nineteenth-century boiler room: it is full of heavy, old-fashioned machinery. Nevermind, I'm sure I can find the entrance to my kitchen just a little further on, so I'll go through and look for it.

As I pass by some of the machines, I marvel at their intricacy and the clarity with which I can perceive how they are constructed. I pass one machine that has a cylindrical body like an old stove. Although it is made out of solid black cast iron, there is a primitive electric cord incongruously coming out of it, so I figure it must be from a period of technological transition in the late nineteenth century. The electricity is driving some kind of rotating grinder that is hidden in the upper part of the cast iron body under a round upper plate, and with a flash of insight I think I know what this is: it must be a mill of some kind! But what is it grinding? I look at it a little longer and see a lower basin, also cast iron, positioned below the cylindrical body to catch drippings of some kind: the drippings resemble hot slag, semi-melted metal. Whatever this thing is milling, it is definitely not flour!

I continue to make my way through the room, dodging complex pieces of shaped metal and machinery that crowd around closely on all sides, but when I get to the far wall I'm disconcerted to find that there's no door. How am I going to get back into my house? Although there seems to be no exit in the walls other than the door I came in, the ceiling is so far overhead as to be out of sight, and I observe that this is less a room than a vertical shaft filled with industrial machinery all the way up, so I begin to levitate and rise through the lattice of metal bars. When I get about three storeys up I see in the wall what looks like the worn wooden cover of a hatch, arched on the top and with a flat base. There is no handle and it looks like it would be too small to crawl through comfortably, but I figure I can make a portal in the wall here to pass through.

Aiming my wand at the wall, I intend for a portal to form in the location of the hatch. Although nothing appears that I would recognize as a portal, the wall changes, the area in front of me becoming transparent, and just a few feet beyond I see a vertical transparent sheet of glass, apparently the wall of a neighboring building, a modern glass-walled high-rise. Directly across from me through the glass, I see what looks like the interior of a cafe, the sort of place the people who work in this building might stop for coffee or a snack on their lunch hour. It is dark inside and empty of customers, as it is nighttime, but I notice with mild alarm that several cops are running through the cafe and aiming guns at me! They seem very deliberate, as though this was a sting operation directed at stopping me. If they shoot, they'll surely break the glass and then I'll be exposed.

I consider making the first move and breaking the glass myself to engage them, but I don't feel like getting into combat. I point my wand toward the cops with the intention of creating some kind of protective barrier between us, but I don't see any change and can't tell if this is successful. I decide to just get out of here. Making another portal directly in front of me seems like a bad idea, because the cops might shoot at any moment, so I get a bit creative and make the portal directly under my feet—all this time I have been hovering in the air, after all—and then I take what feels like a leap of faith and simply let myself fall directly into it. Would any pursuers be able to follow? As I fall, I decide that probably the best course at this point is to let the portal lead me to waking, and so I transition from feeling as though I'm falling through a round tunnel of undefined space to waking up in my bed and scrambling to start taking notes before the memories fade.

It's interesting how clear and stable my dream memory remains—even of such a complex series of episodes—for as long as I am still dreaming, and it is only on waking that the whole fabric begins to thin and fray unless it is captured immediately. Fortunately there were no problems with my notebook this time so I jotted down the key details quickly by hand and then spent the next hour and a half typing up my full draft of the report while the memories were still fresh in mind. I don't mind devoting the time (and sacrificing the sleep) for it when the dreaming is so good!

Date: 25 Aug

Pre bed: 200 val, l arg & lysine

Cannot quite recall the exact beginning but remember willing the scene to appear as I was falling alseep. There were a number of coming into shape items and I told myself that my subcon is at this point trying to make something out of them so concentrate. There were a number of scenes.

I don't recall what happened when I finally entered the dream but there was some active dream scenario going on.

After looking around expectedly and not seeing a pyramid to enter, I notice people getting on a bus and wonder whether to give it a try. It doesn't strike me as possible to manipulate the dream as much as to be inside the bus while actually going somewhere and really get there but I give it a try. It's getting rather full, but I find a free seat and sit there. To be certain this tour bus is going in the right direction, I shout and make them all repeat "We are going to the Pyramid of Giza". Here I have thoughts about whether my throat is moving (DV thread) as I feel physical pressure while shouting.

Don't recall getting off the bus and in the next scene I'm already inside this place with an atmosphere of an excavation dig. It looks as if I've made it past the pyramid's entrance and am now in how I in the dream more or less imagine its interior. It has the feel and look of a number of previous dreams about sightseeing in Egypt. Excited, I decide to explore the ancient Egyptian structure. There are two directions to go and after some maneuvering I orient myself towards what feels like the center.

It is now quite lively, full of crowds of people getting in and coming out. While this should be the interior of the pyramid and be very spacey in my dreaming mind, it still feels to me as if I'm taking forever to walk towards the official "lobby". It's like a tourist attraction where you first have to go to the lobby/cashier and then enter a separate part with the things to see. On my way to the center, I pass by a girl with a pink feather on her head and my hand by mistake gets into her hair. As a result the feather falls from her head and then I take it. How weird, I think to myself, what my hand did. The feather is beautiful and as realistic as it gets, I'm very fascinated by the looks of it and the feel of the dream in general.

As I continue on my way, the little girl catches up with me and starts whining about her feather. I tell her that I didn't mean to take it on purpose rather it just happened as an accident and give it back. She calms down continues towards the exit, while I continue my walk toward the center in this carpet covered corridor. I finally reach the center and what lies beyond. There is a large number of exhibition items on each side of the walls. At this point they are all Egyptian, way too many to be able to recall, but I remember a statue of Anubis in dark stone with decorations in green and gold, maybe a round necklace with green stone. I start thinking about how this place now almost completely resembles a museum and continue my walk, looking at the fancy items.

The dream ends at some point. I stay still but it does take a bit longer.

DEILD: As I fall asleep, I unconsciously grab onto the scene and make it so that the same place comes back. The ancient stuff is still around. There were also large columns at some point but I vaguely recall these. Just found it a bit weird to be back, as I wasn't too focused consciously on that. I continue my tour in this pyramid museum, going from room to room and looking at lots of exhibition items. This time they are more from classic and medieval ages and I see a room full of different sizes and styles of angel statues. They all look really cute and I wonder why do they have so many angel statues here.

I continue down the corridors looking at items but soon hear angry shouts as if some sort of riot is taking place. I think about inception. They surely won't catch up with me, but despite my weak efforts to ignore them, the trouble makers are coming closer. Now I have a typical dream problem, I really want to leave this place but am trapped in an endless labyrinth of corridors and doors. There is a really weird looking one having a blurred net in front but I as I approach the net kind of disappears. I remind myself to think about outside, windows and things like that. I go through the door and finally in a room with a glass door leading to the outside. It looks locked but I open it just like that.

A DC comes and starts talking about something, kind of trying to hijack the dream with their own scenario while I find myself staring at a pot full of poached eggs. For a moment I become distracted but then come to my senses again. There is a cool looking tower nearby and I head in its direction.

Worried that it's time to wake up, I end up having an FA where I press the snooze button and wild in dream. A brief ld moment in a grandma's place before I wake up for real.

September 07, 2014

---

The Prince's Love's Mom's Chocolate Cake

I was the main character in a Disneyesque princess story. I and my mother were taken into the castle and treated well, since we were poor, and the prince fell in love with me and gave me a beautiful necklace. I was working in the nursery/child-care facilities and one day there was a rumor that the prince was sleeping with a redhead. I trusted him and didn't worry about it, but a little girl took my necklace to play with and I got frantic and she broke it. I was angry and just wanted to be alone. While I was trying to fix it, the evil mother of the redhead had basically spread rumors that the prince and the redhead were to be married and that he thought I was trash ()it turned out the evil redhead-mom was the one who started the first rumor, too. The prince denied it all and ran away because he apparently couldn't handle all the drama, and the evil mother took over. The prince's best friend had been making a potion to track my feelings or something, and people had called me his kitten but then when I was all depressed someone told the Prince's bestie, "your kitten has issues," and he replied with "my raccoon apparently..." (he thought I was like a raccoon?) And the potion was reacting to a bottle of some liquid, acting like a magnetic liquid they have at the Hands-On Museum in my town.

Flash forward a year or two, and I am in a room with a ton of bunk beds. All the old nobility were forced to sleep in there and work their asses off, even the redhead daughter. I woke up from a nightmare one early-morning, and the Prince's little sister had comforted me, and so I hugged her. Then, as I walked back to my bunk passed the redhead's bunk, I pulled her hair. And then felt bad about it because she wasn't a bad person. She was actually pretty nice, I had learned. It was just her mom that was evil.

Then I find out a way to find the prince and stop the mother. I cut my hair and put on a baseball cap, and head out to find my own mother, who had left the castle to become a cake-baker.

My perspective changes rapidly from my mother's and the prince's here, so I'll just describe what happened:

The prince saw my mom one day, and there are flashes of hope in his eyes and he runs to her to ask about me. His bestie is with him and tells him to calm down, but he's too excited and tries too eagerly to help her lift a huge crate, and the contents all spill. They were all her cake ingredients, basically her living. People gathered but the bestie tells them there's nothing to see and calmly picks up half a chocolate cake. I become him at this point, and look down at the chocolate cake. It looks really good so I take a bite and it's soooo yummy. I take bite after bite until it's a little sliver of cake-crust in my hands. My dream self has really enjoyed eating things lately.

The prince payed for new baking materials, and then walked away sadly when he found out my mom didn't know anything about me. Then, he goes off into the field next to us, and starts singing in Adam Levigne's voice about how sad he was that his love is gone. But I saw me (I am still in the Prince's Bestie's POV) come up to my mother just as he started singing and everyone was all gushy and I, as the Prince's Bestie, was thinking "wow, I really missed something not having watched this movie!"

Or something like that, at least.





Zukin's Library

I was in library after a huge storm with Zukin. I think her room was somehow in the library. Either that, or her co-op had suddenly added a library in most of the rooms.

We decided to go to a theater to watch some kind of show... Maybe it was a presentation about a group? The girl next to me starts climbing the wall assassins creed style (or maybe it was more Legion-Style). She ties a curtain in a knot at the bottom and top so that people can climb up it. And then people start climbing it like crazy. One after the other. Kinda creepy, like moths to a flame...

I realize Zukin's not there anymore so I snapchat her "where you at?" and go to find her... But I go around the building and where her room should be there's just another library and I'm like "WTF" and I get really confused. I walk around looking for her room but can only find libraries and workout rooms (?!)

Then I realize that I'm at the library on campus, not Zukin's house. I was walking down the stairs to find her and stopped in the stairwell to look out the window at another storm coming in, and two Asians are in the stairwell and I scoot around them at the corner when I am suddenly in her room. She had gotten my snapchat and summoned me there. Except then I realize I just woke up in her room and it was a dream. A lot of my stuff was in her room too, and she was telling me to wear my brown Mary-Janes with my long brown pants so it would match AND my pants wouldn't get ruined on the ground. She's telling me about a dream she had just had where she was in the library, and I was there, but only for part of it.

I'm like "OMG me too!" and I tell her that she summoned me from the dream and that we had shared it or something.





Futuristic Society

I was in a futuristic society where classes were extremely uniform but drastically different. There were the well-to-dos, who were all the same, and the rogues, who were more like our society today, all different and colorful and lively. I was Iron-Man for part of the dream, and learned a secret code for a group that wanted to demolish the classes and make everything the way it used to be. I was in a rogue market that had the same vibe as the fish market in Seattle. A family came in and the little boy sat on the Iron-Man-Spot of the couch, and I said the secret code I had learned previously to the dad. He knew the code but was weary and cautious because the group was radical.

Then I heard a large boom and everyone started panicking. Next thing, I was flying through the air, watching this HUGE piece o' shrapnel that had fallen from space. It was a piece of a spaceship and it had collided directly with the huge church tower in the center of the well-to-dos city. I woke up just as the impact had started. I got to watch what bit I did see in super slow-motion. I could see the ripples and waves as the shrapnel completely obliterated the huge church spire.





Mom's Mall Shop

I was in an old mall with my mom and apparently she had a shop there. But it had been closed for a long time.

She opened it up and apparently it sold lotions and scents and shampoos and there was a little room for massages or something. The main part of the store had a lot of random items. A lot of people started coming in and shouting, "it's open again it's open again!!"

It reminded me of a shop downtown... There was also a hotel behind it that my mom ran. There was a little girl who went through the door to the rooms, so I followed her to bring her back to her mother, but she got lost in all the rooms. The hallways were tall and wide and all antiseptic-white, and the lights were blue-tinted; it was like in some kind of abandoned hospital or something. I wandered around the creepy-ass halls, looking for the girl, and then woke up.





LOL

I must have dreamed that I had written down another dream from that night, because I couldn't find it when I woke up again.

Ritual: I got fed up with the dry spell I've been having for the past couple weeks and took drastic measures. Back in 2010 I experimented a couple times with nicotine (in patch form) as a lucidity trigger, but quickly gave it up because I found it impossible to fall asleep with even a very low dose (half a 7mg patch, so 3.5mg). These days my problem—and the main thing hampering my lucid attempts—is that I've been falling asleep way too easily, so I thought there would be a good chance I'd be able to fall sleep wearing the patch and see if it had any effects on dreaming after all.

Went to bed at midnight, woke naturally at 3:30am and stayed awake until 5am, mostly reading, but finishing the WBTB with a brief seated meditation. I googled to make sure using nicotine patches well past their expiration date was advisable, but was reassured by what I found. So I took 200mg L-Theanine to make it easier to fall asleep, and applied a 7mg patch with half its surface covered, so 3.5mg total (though the dose might have weakened with age). I also worked on my mental motivation, not just intending but vowing to get lucid tonight.

When I returned to bed I felt my heart beating faster than normal, though I wasn't sure if it was the nicotine (if so the patches must be exceptionally fast acting, because this was only minutes later) or just a consequence of the excitement and anxiety of trying something new. The feeling reminded me trying to fall asleep on galantamine, which also has a very powerful stimulant effect. However, I started counting and was reassured (and somewhat surprised) when I began to lose my place already by the time I hit "ten." I reset and kept counting, rarely making it as far as "ten," and often not past "one," until I felt my mind had reached a place where I could easily fall asleep, then turned on my side to do so.

I fell asleep very quickly, although my intention to remain aware of the transition went nowhere—I just zonked out. I woke up almost two hours later with the memory of a DILD and least one FA. The dreams were definitely atypical in tone: the plot was epic and confrontational, which I attribute to the nicotine. The dream awareness was spontaneous rather than triggered, but the lucidity was at very low level. Worse, my dream recall was unusually vague and fragmentary.

DILD: The dream had a complex narrative that I can't satisfactorily recall. The most notable aspect was that my husband was in it and my dream logic concluded that it was a shared dream and that he was actually there and trying to learn the ropes of lucidity from me. We were trying to summon spirit allies, and he wanted a gryphon. The first version looked cartoonish, reminiscent of the monsters from Where the Wild Things Are, but it wasn't a proper gryphon. Neither were the next two, though they were massive, monstrous creatures that reminded me of the kinds of avatars you would summon in the later Final Fantasy games. When I summoned my own spirit ally, I was surprised to find that it was just a somewhat transparent virtual version of me.

(Source: I think this was day residue, as last night in ME3 my Shepard came across the holograph AI of herself on the Citadel. The notion of iconographically incorrect gryphons might have been inspired by the poor versions I saw in the astonishingly bad—so bad it was almost good, I couldn't stop laughing—film version of Hercules I caught the last fifteen minutes of on cable yesterday evening.)

I wish I remembered the plot of the dream more clearly. There was a group of entities that we were in conflict with, and they were insisting that I was breaking the rules of dream in some way. I disagreed, as I felt justified to do as I liked in my own dream, so I countered by exerting a massive field of control over the environment that made the ground shudder and shattered buildings. It wasn't quite an earthquake, more a gravity-reversing vibration: I have a mental image of dust and dirt rising and hovering in the air accompanied by an almost subsonic drone. It felt good to do this, powerful, though something of a guilty pleasure.

(Source: I was sure there was a waking life source for this image of dust rising from the earth in the wrong direction but couldn't remember; now it occurs to me that it might have been from the movie Transcendence, which I saw last month.)

At one point I had the presence of mind to wonder, or maybe someone asked me: was I actually hurting anyone by doing this? But I pointed out that you can't hurt DCs merely by disrupting their physical bodies, because the dream state does not have that kind of continuity. I demonstrated this by plucking my own spirit ally from deep in the rubble where she had been buried and reviving her.

I might actually have remembered somewhere in all of this to try the Patronus TOTM, which had been my intention before falling asleep, but if so I don't recall the outcome, unless that was somehow connected with the idea of spirit allies. Too vague to be sure, unfortunately.

FA: I woke up next to my husband and wondered if it had really been a shared dream, so I watched his reaction carefully. He gave me a look which led me to conclude that it had been. But before long it began to dawn on me that this might be a false awakening, and soon I was sure of it. I decided to review the events of the previous dream in my mind before I forgot, but as I was doing so, I became aware that my mind was interpolating new ideas, and whole new scenes were even taking place, spinning off from my memories of the previous plotline—this is the risk of reviewing dream memories while you're still dreaming!

For instance, when I thought about our spirit allies, a girl showed up at the foot of the bed who I took to be a transformation of the gryphon in the previous dream, only now she looked human and very familiar. I tried to place her face and decided she resembled the character "Marnie" from Girls. Not sure where that came from, as I haven't watched an episode of that since the last season ended.

Then when I was trying to remember the main plot, it became confused with a new plotline in which I was worried that war was imminent and that if it took place, the spirits of mythological creatures would fuse with nuclear bombs to create a weapon that was as devastating to dream as to the waking world.

I was out trying to investigate and prevent this outcome, and found myself in the house of people who had melee weapons shaped like real or imaginary animals. One was a rod with a sculpted head shaped like the head of an animal that mingled the qualities of a lizard and a single-horned rhinocerous. Another was a club shaped like a narrow stylized boar, and while my husband was handling it, I noticed that it could also be fired like a crossbow. Again, very random imagery.

Conclusion: I would call this a partial success at best, as the low-level awareness and limited recall made the overall experience less than satisfactory, and I didn't actually succeed in doing the TOTM that was my original goal. Still, breaking my dry spell by any means is reassuring. It definitely felt like nicotine had an effect on dream content, and I attribute the unusually "epic and confrontational" quality to its influence. However, after waking up I felt almost as uncomfortable and unrested as I do after using galantamine, so while I might experiment a little more along these lines, I will not be making this a frequent induction method—which is probably for the best, nicotine bad and all that.

Dream - Lucid

I felt myself entering a dream. All around me was this texture that looked like it came out of DK64; it was a light brown bamboo-like texture with some green leaves. I let the dream world finish forming. I then noticed that I could kinda see through the texture that was in front of me; it was like it was a sheet covering a big window. I could see that there were trees outside, and that it was daytime. I pulled the sheet back to reveal the big window, which was looking out onto a landscape with lots of trees. I started to walk through this landscape, and felt that the dream was quite stable, but I guess it wasn't because I woke up with no warning whatsoever.

~

I was laying in bed in the morning, and I asked Dallas if he was itchy. He said yes. I hoped we didn't have bed bugs; for some reason, I was afraid that we did. He got up, but I stayed in bed for a minute. I then got up too, and looked at the bed behind me. There were a few of these black/grey ant-looking things up by my pillow. There were about as big as two quarters each. Ugh. Is that what bed bugs look like? I wonder how long they'd been there for? I then thought about how at least now we could save the embarrassment of having to tell the apartment complex that we had them since we lived in a house now (not true IWL).

I then started to wake up in the middle of the night in our bed. Phew, just a dream, but I better ask Dallas again if he'd itchy just to make sure. I started to tap him with my right hand to wake him up. My touch felt very "muted"; my hand felt kind of numb to me touching him, but I felt the pressure. I assumed it was just because I was just waking up (missed dream sign D: ). I asked him if he was itchy, and he said yes. Hmm...maybe it wasn't as much of a dream as I had thought it was.

In the morning, we got up. Again, he was up before me. When I pulled my covers back to get out of bed, I noticed that, on the inside edge of the comforter, there were these tiny black gnat-looking bugs crawling around, and there was also a dead wasp and a dead bee. What the heck? I got out of bed and went to get Dallas to tell/show him. I told him about the dead wasp thing and how weird that was.

I believe there was more to this one, but I can't recall.

~

I was outside in a swimming pool in Oregon. There were many others swimming as well. I was there visiting my parents. It was daytime, and there were many palm trees around, as if I was in Florida or somewhere more tropical. I was thinking about the time of year it was and how in the heck it was still warm enough for swimming. I knew it wouldn't last too much longer.

I then saw, sitting at the end of the pool on the edge with his feet in the water was Robin Williams. He had a bright smile on his face and seemed to be glowing he was so happy. I swam towards him and we spoke, but I don't remember what we spoke about.

Dream skip. There was a point where I became lucid. I'm not sure when or what triggered it, but I was lucid. I decided to fly. I took off into the air from wherever I was and was flying quite fast and had a good amount of control of where I was going for the most part. It was evening, I believe, and I was outside. I flew higher until I was above the clouds. I looked down at all the clouds below me. It was very pretty. I started to lose height for a bit until I was below the clouds again. I thought to myself to simply rise up again instead of thinking too hard about it. I gained a bit more height.

Then, back to the NLD. I was inside somewhere in a small room with white walls, and I figured out that the Robin Williams thing happened awhile ago, and he wanted to meet back up with me, but the day before we were supposed to meet up, he killed himself. I figured it out by looking at his planner and his calendar, which was hanging on the wall; he had written in light orange ink "Krista" on October 3rd (not an accurate date I know but it's a dream). In fact, all of his writing was in light orange.

I then spent a lot of the dream trying to figure out how to go back in time or how I could meet up with him anyway. I'm honestly not sure if it was one or the other or both, because it feels quite jumbled in my mind. There was a point where I was back in the swimming pool.

I also feel like there was some more lucidity, but it was very brief.

~

I was inside somewhere, preparing donuts for some group thing. I called the person I was going to give free donuts to. I was going to just pick a random person. I picked a person with a very short name, it was something like Roi or something; it seemed, in the dream, that the person I was calling was from a video game, Fire Emblem maybe (I know there is a "Roy" in that game). He answered though, and didn't sound like he had any sort of accent. I was asking him about the donuts and what kinds he wanted and stuff. As I was talking to him, I was in a room where we were getting trays of donuts ready and putting the boxes together and stuff. Others were there as well, I remember Courtney S. being there among them. I then left the room to go do something else, and asked the guy to hold on a second. I was still holding my phone. I was looking for something. It had to do with the donuts, but that's all I remember. I was thinking to myself this guy probably doesn't believe I'm getting ready anymore because all the noise from the other room had stopped. I then got back on the phone with him. Fortunately, he was still there. I was telling him I was doing something that I really wasn't doing, though I don't remember what it was. I was frantically searching for something still.

Then, we got off the phone. We had everything set up on long white tables; there were many boxes of donuts there, most being all chocolate iced or a combo of half chocolate iced and half glazed. My box for the guy I was on the phone with had lots of different kinds in it. I remember a vanilla iced and a maple iced, and there were some with an orange icing on them. As I was looking at the orange icing, I wondered if it was cheese or icing. The ones with lots of icing had the icing overlapping onto other donuts. It looked kind of messy, but they'd at least taste good. I did wonder, though, if I was supposed to use those kinds of donuts since everyone else seemed to have the same two kinds. Oh well, too late now.

People started to come in to get their donuts. I was trying to spot my guy, whom I expected to look Asian. He was one of the last ones to come in, however. When I saw him, I was actually sitting on a platform or something a little above everyone's heads. The guy looked like a guy I knew that came into the coffee shop regularly IWL. He was young, about 30 or so, had a small dirty blonde beard/mustache, and light brown hair on his head. He looked up and saw me, and he spoke to me, though I don't remember what he said.

My Father , brother and I were climbing on these huge statues and going all the way up in till we reach the end. I was telling me Father that the shape on top of the statue had a name that I couldn't remember. That's when my brother leap to the next statue and it was my turn but I was beginning to trip so my Father went over me lunging at next statue. I begin yelling I can't hold on as I fall all the way down and hit the floor in my living room. My Father ask me if I was alright however I struggle to speak or get up. My brother says I shouldn't be hurt or unable to move. The blow wasn't as strong as it should be but I felt like I hit my head little hard during it but eventually I manage to get up. That's when the scenery change where I woke up in my Father room and saw this red hair woman telling me to follow her to some type of canyon outside. I left the house and was amaze how orange and soft the ground was. I begin lying on it while looking at the clear blue sky telling her this is a incredible place. However she told me it was time to go as someone was after the both of us so I started running till the scene change again to where I appear in the living opening my Father door again. I find my brother sitting in a middle of the corner wearing a lot of blue technology on his head. I seem to have gotten this misguided feeling so I grab my brother in a funny manner saying it was him who trick me. We both begin laughing but the scene change again to where I had just close my Father door. I begin walking in to the living room and felt the need to enter inside the garage. Once I did I see my Mother and the television playing I ask her which episode was playing but she ignored me and went back in the living room. I look at the television as it switch to a gaming channel and could tell something was wrong. The character in the game was very off and wasn't playing like it would in real life. That's when the television screen shatter in my face as I begin to become lucid the dream fades out leaving me in to this greenish blue fog in till I woke up 3 seconds later. Lucidity Time 3 seconds

I was in a factory and was lowered on a platform in till a lot of Japanese zombies in doctors attire came at me. I begin fighting all of them at once and killing as many as I could. However the number grew overwhelmingly high of how many machines were producing them. So I jump down to the ground and witness the sub leader. She wasn't a zombie but I could tell she orchestrated the entire plan so I become lucid and grab her by the throat in till she kick me in the chest. As I fell to the ground we continue to fight when suddenly the leader appears and joins in. Going against both of them was very difficult so I basically pull out a knife and quickly counter the sub leader attack and once again grab her by the neck. I place the knife carefully close to her neck and told the leader if he takes one more step it's over for her. The leader quickly took this as an opening and pulled out his trident and made several attempts to stop me. I slit the sub leader throat as she mumbles things in Japanese. That's when I see a trident coming right at me that wakes me up. Lucidity Time 1 minute.

9/9/14
*Lucid nap or 3rd wbtb (one wbtb during night, one got up for about 30 minutes and ate one portion of oatmeal 8-8:30am, third one simply got up to use the restroom and straight back to bed quite sleepy! ~10am? led to DEILD or in dream DEILD)

~1115 350 wbtb very tired! Browse pictures on phone until semi awake but still exhausted but got to some interesting dreamlets before dozing off.

Held #hostage and I say that I need to get my asthma inhaler in my backpack but I plan to pull out my gun. #clever Woken by wife.

During the 3rd mini wbtb I repeated out loud "I'm dreaming" repeatedly maybe total of 40 reps with breath/breaks. I either had and in dream DEILD or I had a mini awakening and DEILD in which I thought I heard someone at the door downstairs and I decided to take it as HH's (and as I'm saying this into my dream journal there was a quite loud creek/pop at my bathtub and the goosebumps are apparent! I realize it is just normal settling of the house but it sure was louder than normal.) Anyway when I heard the sound in the dream that sounded like someone at the front door I took it as HH's and I just focused on going back to sleep. When I do, I get very strong vibrations and I knew I was entering a dream if not already in one. The first sensation was of someone coming behind me and rocking me around in the bed. Then I start lifting up off of the bed and I am happy for this, it feels fun and is further confirmation that I'm already dreaming. Then the third sensation is of me sliding backwards like on a roller coaster laying sideways like I think I am laying in bed actually at the time and just going and going and going backwards at a good pace. There's even the sound of a roller coaster and its wheels rolling along the tracks at high speed. This goes for what feels like a good minute and I think to myself well enough of that and I seem to be kind of floating in a bit of a foggy void. This is late late in the morning and I'm guessing that my dreaming mind doesn't have much left to offer up. I do start getting a vague image of a sexy woman and we start having sex floating in this void. At one point I turn her over and

Spoiler for X rated:

stick it in the other way.

It feels great but the image quality is still very poor. I turn her back over and decide I will experiment with an

Spoiler for X rated:

even larger penis and have some more fun. She keeps repeating "your huge **** is too big for my little *****" as she continues to pull me into her!

This feels even better then I get the sound of my bedroom door opening and then the feeling of someone grabbing both my feet and tugging on them once as if to say hey what are you doing still asleep. I get a strong urge to confirm whether or not this is actually happening and as I am apparently dreaming of myself rolling around in my bed and feeling like I'm completely naked I notice that I can't open my eyes. This makes me suspicious that I'm still dreaming and I sit up in bed (still in the dream) and I blindly growl like a crazy person having a bit of fun. I get the strong urge again to make sure that I'm still dreaming and I then force my eyes open to a view of my sleep mask actually now fully awake but eyes still wanting to close some more. If it were not for this strong urge to make sure someone was not inside my room I think I could've gone on dreaming some more but perhaps with weaker recall of all that happened before, who knows. I'm at the moment of transcribing this trying to decide if I should try again but it seems too late and probably a waste of waking life since the odds are very low. I have also become quite awake now transcribing all of this. I also feel that over-sleeping will cut into my dreaming tonight. Although the visuals left much to be desired, I am very happy that my presence in a lucid dream was back very strong as compared to my last several lucid dreams. I had a much stronger sense of self. Also, the sensations were very strong. With my day practices becoming rote again yesterday, I looked up and did exercise 4B from the open beta exercises and it drew some inspiration for me. The mechanics of this particular wake back to bed and DEILD are still unclear to me. 200


Quick notes on previous 3 LDs:

9/7/14 (September 7th)
"Consternation" 12 530

Time doesn't make sense=lucid. #timeInconsistent . Time was showing much earlier in day when it was just night. Bounce/float in house=fun. Peek out front. Go out back to 2 different neighbors. Maybe 3 minutes. Wake otherwise might have forgotten. Low recall. 199


9/6/14

Mom visiting soon IWL. In dream she brought my eldest cousin on her side and we had a long hug. I wanted my #Mom to give me #hug too but my cousin really seemed to miss me. Too much? Then she is accidentally brushing her hand against my junk? #dcBoldness Wait she keeps doing it. I ask her if this is a dream and then realize a DC could give me any answer true or not so need to RC but still hugging. Try float then glottal RC. The lucid was almost lost with glottal RC which confirmed I am dreaming. Though almost lost, it still felt very dreamy and I caught that it wasn't over and extended dream patiently waiting in void-like fuzziness/grayness imagining a beautiful blonde unfortunately got one that seemed to be based off another cousin but wasn't an exact match for her. Undressed her and had intercourse. FA recording dream. 198

Friend has an assistant named Wuellda? So and so said she would be here..wait no she told me that...what in a dream?..exactly! #dream thought of.


9/4/14
11? 230 I'm finally turned 21. A countdown clock or app confirms #tracking. I can finally get into that cool #club and will go tonight. No one can hold me back anymore. Gambling on a cards table game to get #money for something. This feels like it would be my son's dream as I recall no excitement when I turned 21. #casino

*440 experimenting on the edge of sleep zoom floating closer and closer to ceiling tiles (none above bed IWL) try to go back to #waterPark or anywhere. Earlier there was a fight in lazy river where floating with son. Before people #fall from water slides not following rules. Before I am #driving and getting directions from passenger to a 15 floor building, repeatedly asking is that it...no, I see it is just a water slide tower. FA caught: talk to wife from edge only air escaping sound #gasping and some hand movements. I think if I am more on the waking edge of sleep, she may get scared and may be thinking of scene from Intruders. 197