non-lucid

3.2.2023

Going to Class

On my way to class. It is a class for which I am a teaching assistant. I am with someone else, and we seem to be running a little late. My companion takes a nearby elevator to the 8th floor, which is where the class is. I seem to be a little delayed for some reason, and the elevator doors close before I can get in. I spend a bit of time either trying to get back into this elevator or into another one. I find an elevator control panel which seems to just be attached to a wall with no elevator around, but when I press a button the floor nearby starts rising. It turns out that corner of the hallway was an elevator. I get into it, and somehow end up rolling onto my side or my back. The elevator lifts into the air, and turns over to deposit me standing upright in some kind of receiving pod a few floors up.

...At some point I’m trying to control where the elevator goes, as though it were a lucid dream (but I don’t know if I was lucid). I might be trying to get to class here. I can imagine a door opening to one side, and leading to a hallway, then on the opposite side leading to another hallway. Then the front and back of the elevator...

...I make it to the classroom. My fellow TA is there. The students seem to be getting a little restless, and class has not started. I wander around a bit, and class still isn’t starting. At least one student starts doing some homework. Then I start thinking that perhaps I was supposed to be teaching the class. Oops...

Danger, gun, spaceship

Walking back from somewhere at night. It is kind of sketchy in the neighborhood where I am walking. There are some people nearby that appear to be fighting, or something. They are in a lot off to the right of the road where it appears that a building has been demolished. I keep walking, going around a bend to the left. It is still kind of scary-looking now, but I have a gun with me. I tuck the gun into the back of my waistband, and under a shirt or jacket so nobody can see it. As I continue on my way, I see a construction worker, or something like that. I come across a factory that is open, and people are working. I go inside, since it feels a bit safer.

I have a little apartment where I spend the night. I fear that people are out to get me, but I have my gun and it makes me feel a little bit safer. When I have the gun nearby or in my hand, I am able to relax enough to sleep.

I seem to be on the starship Andromeda. On the Andromeda, part of the preferred reading appears to be the Bible. I see at least one Bible. Also, there is a room there where it seems safe. It’s like the captain’s office or something. The trouble is that it has an alarm system that keeps going off, and possibly making a loud noise. In addition to the noise, it sprays stuff around the inside of a room. Someone else has taken this room before I could get to it, but I think they put me in another one just like it. It is supposed to be a preferred room because it is so safe (it still seems to be the theme of someone trying to get me). I find a room off of the main room that is a little quieter and where I won’t get sprayed with stuff.

...Something about people being held, possibly as prisoners. Or possibly as medical patients. Anyway, I go somewhere, and when I come back some ruffian-types have killed them. The ruffians were crew members, or something. It seems like they thought they had the legal authority to kill these people, but it would have been merciful to let them go and the killing was needless. I think I liked at least one of them personally. There might have been another set of these people though...

...This might have been related to my brother’s mushrooms. In waking life, he is growing mushrooms in his basement. In the dream, he ate three, but one of them was toxic. That seems to have been the way with these mushrooms – about two out of three with be toxic. Or something. His son might have gotten sick from one...

Fragments

...People toward the end of a peninsula-like ridge. Maybe fighting? They come back toward us where we can see them... ...(maybe the same dream, but I don’t know) a corner of the property that I have visited before [it seems like I have dreamed about this location previously].

...Driving down to a church that I used to attend. There is some function going on there. Family is with me, I think. I’m thinking about which Sunday school class they will attend...Leaving church, I think we’re planning to go to where my Grandmother used to live. I think it would be nice if I could stay there at least one night, but then I remember that my Mother and I came together so it would be hard to get back without her having to come and pick me up...We stop at a store (if this is the same dream).

- I'm in a group of people with new technology that allows you to erase bad memories. Only thing is, all the bad memories are building up and will eventually return to everyone. This scares the crap out of me.
- A part with Batman on the roof of a rainy building, waiting for a villain to show up. I'm there too, but apparently that ruins the atmosphere.
- I'm in a car with my friend, driving around my apartment.

- I'm with my father. We walk through a neighborhood, and then through an empty field to the rest of civilization. The sky is a weird purple, and everything feels surreal. I mention to my father how the reason that the neighborhood is cut off from the rest of the urban space is because it was procedurally generated.
- 3D sculpting a character's head
- My sketches win a competition, and everyone is impressed, but I secretly just got them online. I feel guilty but don't know how to explain myself.

Some dream that was not lucid, but involved my lucid dreaming self. In it, I was asked to help push an interstellar colony ship using my flying powers. Then I found out halfway through the journey that the crew of the ship intended not to pay me/credit me for my help so I abandoned them and refused to slow down the ship at the destination system. Thus they were stuck with no primary drive system hurling through interstellar space for all eternity, unable to slow down.

I was then flying through space on my own and found a solar system where four stars were stacked vertically on top of each other, hovering there impossibly, and a number of planets including a green gas giant with rings.

NLD x1

It's a beautiful day.

Clear blue skies, and a space shuttle landing on the moon.

Hah, the moon! Look around, this is clearly Earth! The moon! You expect me to believe we're on the moon?

I'm at the airport now. How did I walk all the way here? A woman parks her car in the most obnoxious spot possible. I realize I forgot my luggage and start running back for it; plane takes off in 30 minutes.

I'm eating cakes. They are OK. A little too sweet, and the interior is hollow. I walk off and sit on one of those children's rides at the park you can rock back and forth with the spring at the bottom. Snoop Dogg is there. I ask him what his name means. He tells me it's just fun to say.

I'm outside, and everybody is happy that they just won their freedom. A strangely Disney-like experience for a country supposedly recovering from a civil war. A woman outside has a jetpack, and she keeps flying into the wires. We're all worried she will get electrocuted.

I walk and meet a supposed friend of my parents. I know I will be spending a lot of time with him.

His dad shows off some strange demonstration where blocks fall from the ceiling and arrange themselves into a TV. I am convinced this is utter genius, and part of a family of games called Hoppy II.

My new friend plays Hoppy II to open a little puzzle box. I appear semi-lucid at this point, as I'm convinced I need to remember this. Hoppy II is brilliant. Hoppy II is the best idea I've ever heard of.

We play Hoppy II together now. There is a board. We put a fork into the board. The fork is a thing that happened. Hoppy II is about filling the board with "things that happened." I'm awe-struck.

I'm back in the post-revolution place. They've really built it up since the last year I was here. I start looking around at the cacti near me, and the traffic, and the hint of fog. The air smells fresh and clean.

It's a beautiful day.

Playing tf2.
I was on pl_upward, on blu team, as a spy. I was next to blu spawn, on the building where snipers usually sit. So I disguised as a blue sniper
(Immediate few dream signs here. As a spy, I’d try being behind the lines of the enemy team, and I wouldn’t be disguising as a blue sniper anyway because I never disguise as my own team.)
Looking to the left of the building, I see a mirrored version of it (which doesn’t exist in the real pl_upward), with a red sniper on it.
The red sniper comes to the building I’m on. He appears to be friendly though.
I look down below the building, and I see many players causing chaos and fighting.
(I don’t remember exactly how many players were down there, but it was definitely way over 24, which is the player cap for casual tf2 servers. This is another dream sign.)
That’s all I remember right now from this dream.

Sleep notes: Yesterday, I got to be part of a dope project I cannot disclose about that was a ten-hour-long day, I had to wake up very early to get there, had a breakfast smoothie, and bought a sandwich at the train station to eat as lunch later knowing it was gonna be a long day. It was genuinely a great experience, but I hate to admit this, they treated us poorly on terms of nutrition; Half of the catering consisted of sugar-heavy snacks (Which I didn't eat because I recently quit using sugar) and there was an this weird sweet tasting water that was in a bottle previously used for syrup, that was the only "normal" water, any other option was either cola or sparkling water. There was lunch, but not until 4 pm, which consisted of a very small portion of food and between lunch and eating that sandwich at the end of the day I barely ate because there was nothing but candy and soda available. I ate my sandwich from earlier in the train home, and two bites from my dinner before going to bed early. Safe to say, I suffered a great headache as well as a lot of dizziness yesterday due to poor nutrition and lack of hydration. It's gone now, fortunately.


Anyways, here's my dream:
I believe I was at another field trip of some sort, the same girl from the previous dream and I were once again going to share a hotel room, we hugged and made out, but we were both a little drunk so we didn't go any further than that. That and I also had to go to the bathroom really badly and found myself going though random hotel rooms looking for a vacant toilet because why should I use the one in my room. Finally back from the toilet, I get back in bed with her and we were about to sleep when a guy I knew from theatre crashed into our room to give us a college lecture through a projector which was already installed there. As he asked us questions we answered and he laughed, his laugh (and in hindsight also his appearance) resembled Eric from Sex Education.

A blonde teacher I cannot recall walks into the room and logs into the computer and changes all her folder names to the new class she will he teaching after the head of department from my old theatre school gave her the opportunity to teach her the class she dreamed about. I'm trying to listen to her story, but the setting of the dream has now changed to a classroom whose interior vaguely resembles that of a theatre and cinema foyer as well as the Eye film museum in Amsterdam but in a dark, metal colour. In the classroom sat my old classmates from theatre school complaining about how her changing subjects will somehow affect their studies, but they were doing that while she was talking about her dream class and why she wanted to pursue that which I wanted to hear more about, buy couldn't. I got up from my seat and stood closer to listen, eventually telling the class to shut up and only have one person at a time speak, this angered the class and they all started getting mad at me which didn't help my sensory overload either. They felt threatened by my presence as I was still standing between them and the blonde teacher, who didn't step in once, and my body language seemed defensive in an aggressive way apparently.
Kids from the class get up and tried to pull me out of class, I refuse. They then get the head of department there whom I'm glad is here so I can explain the situation to him, but he angrily grabs me by my wrist and pulls me out of class then tries to find a vacant room, opens a random door in the hallway that leads to an unknown room. We sit down, but as we're about to talk, I wake up and can't get back to sleep to dream about something else because I was fully rested with eight hours of sleep for once!

It was an interesting dream to say the least. The girl from the hotel room from both dreams, is a girl I haven't seen in years now and barely spoken to, let alone thought about for a year now, too. The theatre school part has been more common, though. I should definitely see a therapist about that. Because although this type of situation didn't ever take place in real life, there is a lot of unresolved theatre school trauma I personally still struggle with that still lingers my mind and gets triggered at the most random situations.

Also the hotel rooms as well as the labyrinth of hallways were all pink coloured.

I'm on a vacation with my family. We are at a beach, but the sky is gray. There is a pool nearby the beach and it has multiple "floors" under the water. My sister tries to show me a deep dive area, but I can't hold my breath and I have to go up for air.

I'm cleaning my childhood house with my brother A. I'm annoyed because he keeps assigning me chores to do. At one point I had moved my bed mattress into the garage, but then had to carry it back because I misunderstood what he was asking for. We're outside now, on the east side of the house. I'm playing some game with my brother. Maybe we are doing more chores. The grass is super green, like the way it looks in old pictures. A fighter jet flies very close over us. It does a cool flip trick and I give it a salute. The fighter jet drops two bombs down near us. They sit there a second before exploding. It doesn't hurt, but I feel the heat rapidly go up. I say "I love you, S" and then die.

I dreamt of meeting a child, still a baby, that would end up being my child. I've never planned on having kids and it was a pretty pleasant dream.

Then I had a dream about being in school and getting pulled aside with a couple of other kids and a teacher told us about a pack of comets that were on course to hit the earth towards the end of the year. The dream felt rather real. I recall then seeing what some of the older kids in the school were being shown and it was no-where near the level of truth I'd been shown, basically blowing it off. I remember seeing with others, some things burning through the atmosphere and the sky starting to fizzle as they did.

I believed myself to be at a Harry Potter amusement park, and I was going to a ride that had something to do with dragons.

A lot of people were just sitting around on a plaza, but a few were sitting by a screen repeatedly tapping a single large button. I joined in the tapping, and one could see the number of taps you had placed, as well as the number of taps from others. People were, of course, treating this like a competition, and we kept trying to outdo each other.

Finally we reached some sort of maximum taps, and the show began.

An airplane rolled out onto the "stage", which was simply an extension of the plaza surrounded by walls. It looked like a small Learjet, and it turned to face the wall. Then it simply took off, straight up into the air after a short taxi!

I was astonished to see the wings of the aircraft flexing in impossible ways, as it looped, dived, and rolled about the the audience. I considered that perhaps it was a hologram, but then I came up with a different explanation. It was a balloon!

Yes it was propelled by its own escaping air, and all that tapping was equivalent to a single "pump" to fill the balloon up initially. And indeed I saw the plane was becoming flatter and flatter, until finally it floated down back to where it came from.

This was a very cool trick, and I wondered how they could get such fine control out of it.

Back to tapping, now there were additional tapping booths (in a swimming pool that was suddenly there). These were for a couple auxiliary balloons, and I helped fill one up.

This time, the show began with a kid being lifted by one of the auxiliary balloons and being deposited right outside a nearby fence. How did they do this on? Obviously the kid had to be in on it.

I couldn't understand what the point of the next balloon was, a kid dropped a water bottle or something after seeing it.

Then the main balloon came out, this time it was a giant butterfly, with something about "science" written on it in that Harry Potter font. I didn't really get this, didn't they use magic, not science? But maybe Hermione wanted wizards to be open to science as well.

Well it didn't matter, because the way it fluttered and flipped was even more beautiful than the aircraft. And at the end, it landed upon a member of the audience, made a minor error, and then corrected itself, like a living thing.

The balloon show was over, but there was one final part. Some poll went up, with the announcer asking if we wanted to do a couple options I don't recall, or "60:41". There was a unanimous cry for "60:41" and the announcer seemed almost irritated that nobody ever chose anything else. I was pumped, whatever this was, it was gonna be awesome.

A bunch of tiny pink boats started rolling out, one by one, in a channel carved into the plaza. They were only about 18 inches long. People were being called by name to take a boat (a guy in a Shrek costume obviously took priority), and we rode the tiny boats into the swimming pool. For some reason this was the most fun thing in the world.

People kept funneling into the pool, until the boats were pressed up so tightly it was impossible to move. Seemed dangerous. But I didn't care. 60:41 was amazing!

I was in an IMAX theater. The seat I was sitting in was facing backwards. Weird design choice.

There was a kid next to me I understood to be the child of a family friend. Some other kid had a crush on her, and she loudly rejected him on a microphone that could be heard in the whole theater. Poor fellow, that was gonna be hard to live down.

A trailer came up for some new Pixar film and it looked weird as hell. There was this "invisible woman" but the face looked like floating monster lips and eyes, and she was wearing a colorful faux fur coat.

I was inside the trailer now, walking around the house from the shot. It was stuck in a tornado, à la The Wizard of Oz and I could look out the window and see the city below. The city was slightly pixelated, but it was still a pretty good effect. After all, when you watch the movie, you'd never be looking this closely at it.

The rapid spinning of the home made it hard to walk and I fell over.

Back in the IMAX theater. The chairs were facing the right way now. I guess they had done some fast renovations while I was in the trailer!

The movie started, and I could hear my mom, dad, and aunt remarking on the incredible fidelity of the picture. After 30 seconds of them I told them to be quiet since we were in a theater, and of course was greeted with "no you be quiet."

The movie started with a guy claiming it took 168 bullets to kill a bird. Then I was holding a gun, being told by a man to shoot at the peanut shells that were lying all over the table. I knew this was a trick, since the birds were known to spawn from shot peanut shells.

I then was instructed to shoot one of the birds (which was caged), but I found the trigger very difficult to pull. I was getting nervous since I knew the whole theater was waiting for me to shoot so that the movie could continue. Finally I managed to do it, and I was given a smaller gun. It had a sliding attachment I was told I could pull back for additional power. A grizzled veteran came in and told me that if I saw a lit cigarette, I should immediately put it into a nearby soda fountain or the entire place could burn down. These were the mechanics of the game, and I agreed this all make sense.

I was now in an antique shop and was instructed to shoot old toasters, clocks, and so on. If they died when they were shot they were clearly enemies. I shot an antique clock. We then descended down a long flight of stairs, passing many Spiderman and monsters. These were not enemies, we were after birds and toasters.

At the bottom were many more evil electronic devices (which were just sitting there doing nothing) so I shot them all. The platoon leader was impressed.

We came back up to the surface, onto a city plaza with interesting modern sculptures. I was wondering how this game even worked, given that the graphics were far too good to render in real time. I concluded that this was still a prerendered video, and that the gun [and enemies] were the only things being real-time rendered.

We tried to go somewhere else but a "closed" sign came up. Ended up back in the original shop, ready to descend the staircase again.

Up at about 4:30AM for a WBTB. No recall from earlier in the night. I've just taken the supplements below for the first time. I'll be back to record later. First impression: Choline smells terrible. Like fishy terrible.

Update: Laid in bed for a long time. GF's regular weekday alarm went off by mistake a couple times and messed up my rhythm. Eventually I relaxed enough to start feeling WILD vibrations. I got all the way through the process of "going through the wormhole", and I could see a dream in a tiny pinhole at the end. It was my childhood home. I could see my old PC monitor with Runescape on it, but the dream was black around the edges. I forgot that I needed to 'grab' the dream and I missed my opportunity.

I find myself in my bed and I think to do a nose RC. I can breathe through my nose so I know I'm dreaming. I start to rub my hands together, spin, and demand that the dream stabilize. It doesn't do much, and it feels very unstable and groggy. I try to leave my bedroom but the dream fades. I have a few more false awakenings with similar results. At one point I did spin and see some marked improvement in quality, but not enough to try and pursue a dream goal. I was trying to go to a forest and explore the dream environment.

I'm in something similar to a fast-food restaurant playscape. There is a pool resort nearby. Sunny day and all that. Looks like a dope vacation spot actually. I'm crawling through the tube tunnels, and eventually come out the other side. There is a group of people playing the upcoming Zelda title, Tears of the Kingdom, on an outdoor TV setup. It is lagging really bad. I'm upset about it being this bad. I wake or otherwise recall nothing beyond this point.

Regarding the supplements. I did notice a bit of a headache during the attempt (and now still), as well as some stomach discomfort. I felt my heart beating faster but that is most likely attributed to the WILD experience itself. Nothing earth-shattering but thought I should note it.

Hoping for better results next time. I will say that this is the first time in a long time that I've actually felt the WILD vibrations, tiny victories I guess.

Supplements: Primary Trigger Combination (1st Attempt)
Galantamine: 8mg
Choline Bitartrate: 250mg

Default = Commentary
Blue = Dream
Green = Lucid

I'm in someplace similar to my highschool, but it is on a higher floor than normal. Ceiling seems lower. Assorted open instrument cases are strewn carelessly across the floor. There is a crowd of people in dress clothes creating a familiar pleasant cacophony of instruments warming up and noodling around. I'm in the bandroom before a concert performance. I realize that I don't have my saxophone. I start to sweat and panic. How long would it take me to go home and get it? How long do I have?

-------------------------------- Memory Lapse----------------------------------------

I'm at my friend D's apartment, but it isn't where it normally is. He is living in a loft apartment above a shopping mall strip. I think I might be living with him.
This might be connected to the band dream (IE I went back for my saxophone) but not sure.

-------------------------------- Memory Lapse----------------------------------------

I'm in my ex H's basement. There are some extra couches compared to normal. I have 2 or 3 uncles sitting there. They look like a rougher crowd of people. They are trying to lure a cat at the top of the stairs to come down to them. There is a gate at the top of the stairs blocking the cat. I come lie down on an open spot on the couch. The cat immediately comes to me and lies down on head and starts purring. I feel a sense of pride about my perceived skill with animals.

Default = Commentary
Blue = Dream
Green = Lucid

I was in a large arcade, many cool games, all that jazz.

But I also had a ticket for Bingo, and it was time to play. Everybody gathered in a room and... well, we played Bingo. Truly this dream was boring. My board kept changing and it was irritating me. People were stacking their chips on top of each other into tall towers, including on my board. I inquired if there was some reason for this, but apparently they just thought it looked cool.

OK.

Time passed, now we were paying Jeopardy Bingo. On my board were the answers to questions: "What is [Insert Jeopardy Solution]?" and an older woman would call out the "answers." I was not having fun, but if you won you got money so I stuck to it.

Some woman called out "Bingo!" and went to the old lady in charge of the Jeopardy questions. The lady said, "sorry two is not a prime number", implying the Jeopardy solution was wrong. The winner insisted that two was, indeed, a prime number. And the lady kept refusing. Finally she looked it up on Google and conceded two was a prime number.

My friend then won $100k on the next round. I looked around the room and did a quick count... maybe 40 people here? $40 entry fee? And a $100k prize? The fuck, Bingo was this lucrative?

Finally Bingo was over for the week, and I went to play a claw machine. I caught two stuffed animals. When I retrieved them, they were like stuffed cylinders with a print of the animal on the side. I knew these were considered "ironic" stuffed animals, and they were purposefully dumb and sold in a "you'd have to be a complete moron to buy these" sort of way.

Making my first dream journal post here on DV... it isn't much but here it is:

I'm in some abandoned town. Broken buildings, dust blowing in the wind. Harley Quinn is in front of some town hall assembly. She is tasked with naming the town. She decides to call it Dustsewer, or something similarly ugly. She is doing it on purpose and thinks it is hilarious.

Default = Commentary
Blue = Dream
Green = Lucid

I slept in an uncomfortable position with my head between my pillows and bad a collection of short, strange dreams.

• I was working different audiovisual related jobs, such as operation a radio tower
• I was in a pop up bank in Utrecht Central Station, where a robbery started to happen and had people with rifles and RPGs shoot the place. I try to distract the robbers and make a run for it towards the exit, but suddenly wake up. I might've been shot and woke up or forced myself to wake up until realising that I was dreaming.
• Half asleep, half awake after waking up from that terrifying bank dream, I stare into the dark as my tired brain generates psychedelic visuals of a vibrantly coloured desert where I blow away the sand, and come across strange, colourful creatures
• I had my theatre school graduation, my family as well as the women that did my hair were there, one of my family members was playing GTA on their laptop and I've been told my classmates and school walked by during an inappropriate scene from the game

There were more, but I forgot what happened. A lot of capitalism-themed dreams, and I know exactly why :U Can't disclose yet but I'm happy about it