non-lucid

Morning of March 8, 2015. Sunday.

Dream #: 17,611-02. Reading time (optimized): 3 min.



My dream’s setting is at least a three-way composite of known locations. It seems to be morning. Zsuzsanna and I reside in an anchor-shaped building. Drama starts as I notice, to my left, water spraying from a hidden area of the wall into the kitchen sink, some going over the counter and floor. The kitchen seems to represent an anchor fluke while we in the living room are in the crown area, and a hallway representing the shank branches off in front of us. On my right is a bay-window-like area that represents one of the anchor’s arms. I go over to see what is going on. A young white male is somehow spraying water from his window (outer wall of the “shank”) and through our kitchen window (“fluke” area). The intrusion angers me.

From here, I see that he lives with or is visiting three unfamiliar girls. The room is the first to the left off the hallway. I pull him out and into the living room. I look through a large dresser to find my two guns and notice various unusual devices and parts of many different things filling all the drawers. I eventually find both (though unrealistic and skeletal). I hold them near his head, but I do not hurt him. I fire one in another direction, but a little yellow disc comes out to cause a minor explosion on the floor. I want to scare him so that he never returns. Later, he says that he was harassing us because he does not like how we smell and claims the building and grounds has our unpleasant scent. He also blames a plumbing problem on our cat even though it is a sewer problem from the street.

As I sit by the bay window area, I look out into the yard to see an old lady feeding kittens near some hedges. It is hot, so my shirt is open. I hear her say something to someone else whom I do not see that my presence by the window is not intrusive. She is soon somehow in the living room (though there are no doors) talking about the building and the owner (whose apartment is left off another part of the hall). The owner is also an old lady who soon comes out. She explains new rules, including how no one will be allowed to leave the house after six pm, even to shop. Even buying food after that time might result in eviction. I am annoyed and slowly realize we had unknowingly rented an apartment in a boarding house or halfway house. I argue with the two ladies, but I do not threaten them.

My dream changes to nighttime. I am so annoyed by having to live in the building I decide to jump into the cold turbulent waters off a rocky shore. It extends from a hotel where the bay-window-like area had been. It seems I walk about half a block to get here through a long hall. The incline of the rocky shore is about thirty degrees. I feel good at this point, and my dream is still vivid. Zsuzsanna had been following me out of concern. I throw myself in but now more as a gesture of enjoyment of the icy water. Zsuzsanna attempts to save me from drowning (though I am not in peril), but I soon need to go out farther to save her. From here, there is bliss and closeness as when we first got together in experiencing the unexplained “same skin” perspective in real life. (That is, when I touched a part of her, I could feel it on me as if I was “in” both bodies at once). There is a vague awareness of “My Love, We Are One” from “Orca” (1977).

Other people are now sitting or lying on the rocky shore as if on a beach. I have taken out an Australian twenty-dollar bill. I wave it, and it changes into five or six twenty-dollar bills and at least two hundred-dollar bills. A young man looks on with amazement. I continue to move the notes around as more appear out of nowhere until I have thousands of dollars. (Some of the money is now in piles on the big damp rocks.) My dream begins to fade. I notice that the money only has detail on one side; almost always the case. It probably represents the absence of conscious identity (or viable awareness of the real environment) while in the dream state.

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(That I bothered writing down. I've been super lazy about the stuff recently with starting a new job and whatnot.)

February 13:

Catching cats in a specialized car that has a giant bin in the back for cats to fall into. Driving around on roads and cats are falling from highway overpasses/out of the sky/etc for me to collect. Totally made sense at the time.

February 14:

At a shady Kia dealership where I bought a car before. Came with my mother, brought my work MacBook with me for some reason and was trying to get on their Wi-Fi. Sleazy car salesman shows up, I want to test drive some of the newer Kia Rios. Leave the dealership on a bus. Start asking people where this bus is going, and nobody will tell me. The scenery changes from desert to snow and starts going up the road to the ice castle from Frozen. I have an 'aha' moment and wake up.

March 7, 2015 First WILD!

Fell asleep at around 12:30AM

What i did before I went to bed, and during the day:
I watched inception before bed, in bed, and went to sleep as soon as the movie finished. I drank Bed Time Tea by Yogi tea company at around 9:00PM. Spent most of the day doing a lot of nothing. I was stressed in the morning over a bad test and missed assignment, and homework made it worse. I got better though. Spent a lot of the day building on a Minecraft server. I built a tower that was an educational center to learn a little bit about lucid dreaming. I read Sageous's WILD guide earlier in the morning.


The Preparation to Dream:
First successful WILD! also not only that but my first WILD attempt. Tonight i had a boost in confidence. I told myself It had been too long without a LD and assured myself tonight I will have one.I Woke up at about 4:40AM without any alarm and got out of bed to get a drink, use bathroom, ect. i only stayed out of bed for about 10ish minutes, and got back into bed. I was assuming i was going to fall back asleep after about 20 minutes or less, man was i wrong. i laid motionless on my back other than an occasional itch or two that disrupted me. i laid for a while and started meditating trying to get myself to sleep. i counted my breaths and paid attention to them carefully counting up and down from 10. I would start getting images in my head, "dreamlets" forming and playing out, but for some reason i would immediately snap to an awareness state and wake up a bit. no matter how hard i tried to make myself sleep I kept snapping to a state of awareness no matter how lost in thought I felt. I thought 20 minutes had passed since i last checked the clock at about 5:00AM, and saw to my disbelief it was 6:00AM! i had a few disturbances by people awake at 5:30AM for some reason and that added to it but i was up for an hour and 12Mins. I finally rolled on my side feeling somewhat defeated by my inability to sleep and promptly fell asleep, only i didn't just go to sleep.

The Dream Experience:
I thought i had merely past to sleep, there was a slight gap of nothingness. Next thing i know i was dreaming, in the beginnings of transcending into REM, stuck in place and was pretty sure it was sleep paralysis, as i have already experiences countless times. I heard a lot of strange sounds out of my control, and some scary vivd images. I instantly had awareness kick, like it had done all night while awake, and I knew I Had somehow made it! Right away 4 undead corpses were headed for me whilst still not able to move and they scared me at first until i told myself this is my dream I have no reason to be afraid. I finally gained mobility before they reached me, and i put my hand on them one by one and made them instantly vanish because i did not want them here.
I Paused for a moment, i had to think of what i wanted to do and did the first thing that came to mind and i immediately started to fly, but was very excited and almost lost it, my vision became gray and blurred, however, while still in the air I quickly started to rub my hands together in the dream bringing it back and successfully did so. when I landed it still had a blurry effect, also I don't know how to land from flying well yet. I wanted the scene to change, but I could not. I was in a very very dark, night time scene in a suburban neighborhood. flying over the few areas i did it was just a lot of houses, separated by white fencing, and plenty of trees. It was so dark though I could only see where the there were street lights and house lights, but there really was not any streets yet, just houses crowded together. I wanted to make a sunny scene but couldn't, I tried appearing at a beach but also could not so I just stopped trying. In fact other than making the zombies disappear I couldn't really change anything else. My mind was thinking very quickly, there was soo much i wanted to do but just could not do all at once. I would have one idea, then instantly jump to another. One thing my I tried to do but could not, due to not being able to summon DC or change the scene was go into "caveman mode". I knew its what would happen eventually but it didn't get to happen. I tried to find a DC to interact with. searched a few places here and there. I think i went into a few houses but honestly cannot draw any scenes in my head from them. One thing that did not surprise me until i awoke was one particular scene. While i was looking for the DC i wanted to see, I ended it up my old neighborhood from when I lived in North Carolina. Now i have not seen this place in years, nor have I recalled ever dreaming about it in years, yet here it was. Not everything was exact obviously. I went to a neighbors house there, and it still had the brick and concrete steps i remember as a kid (probably from falling on them once) and I saw my little brother and asked if he knew where this DC was. He said no in a confused manner. I looked out back at the houses and noticed more had appeared out in the darkness. I got up and went out into the street and thought what I wanted to see now but got too far lost in thought and lost control of the dream.

Lucidity is Lost, Regained, but too Late:
Next thing I see, I am already in another scene. I am at my grandmothers house in Connecticut, non-lucid now. i look out the front door and see 3 dogs that look like mine and let them inside, except another group of the same kind of dogs also comes in. i spend the next few minutes trying to get the ones that are not mine back outside. I almost get it and then i have another sense of Lucidity and become Lucid again, unfortunately i become lucid because i notice one thing, the dream is about to collapse. Though i think quick and go to rub my hands together fast before it is gone i am too late, and that thought of rubbing my hands transfers from the dream world to the real world and i wake up rubbing my hands together in real life! It i now about 6:25 AM.

I Fall asleep at about 6:50AM again and sleep till 7:52, 3 minutes before my Alarm to get up for my first Karst HydroGeology Field Trip. I only got around 5-6 Hours of sleep this night. I was trying hard to fight sleep on the way back during the van ride.

Goals and Progress:
about 25 minutes of dreaming and about 20 of them were Lucid! One of my goals was to have a 10 minute LD, and I Passed it. This was my first WILD attempt, and what a success in the dream world it was, it made the long painful night of fighting to go to sleep worth it.

After a DA:O-based scene about pleasantly passing time with Zevran, I have a false awakening and go lucid in a much less pleasant setting: a college dorm where people are being influenced in their sleep by some sinister mental voice - I could make out his tone but not his words. My initial intent was to investigate this without letting the source of the voice realize I was immune to his influence, mimicking the behavior of his victims, but I approach a stone wall surrounding the building and decide nah, I'd rather just leave. I fly over the wall with some slight resistance which I think of as coming from the source of that voice, unwilling to let any of his prey escape.

This takes me down to a river surrounded by great grey boulders, leading down to the sea; as I follow the river it becomes filled by creatures similar to dolphins or porpoises - but incredibly ugly. I'm still feeling a sort of dragging effect from the scene I'd just left, resistance to moving further away; the water and open air feel refreshing but the animals' ugly appearance reflects some negative feel that's still affecting the dream.

There's a song in my head, and I choose to focus on the song instead of on my surroundings - an upbeat dance song from the 60s. I begin to see a music video that goes with it, though not vividly, more like daydreaming, still firmly aware of my surroundings along that river. I'm thinking this could be an interesting opportunity.

The music video has a wipe transition effect, like a clock hand sweeping around, and I focus on it - and now the music video has changed scenes from a dance hall to a boardwalk, and I've transitioned with it. I'm observing the boardwalk from above, 3rd person, with no more sense of that river with the sea creatures, or of the general feeling of unpleasantness from the past few scenes. I'm surprised that worked. It's unusually unvivid, though, still about the quality of a daydream; I wonder if I'm waking up. I shift my perspective, now standing on that boardwalk in the 60s, with a row of brilliantly colored pinball machines off to my right. That's much better. I drop back to non-lucidity for two more scenes.

10/13/2014 I am putting together a croquet set and I'm donating a third TV to work.

A friend of mine in waking life is a ballerina but she's only about 8" tall so I bend down to pick her up and carry her in my arms and I say, You look so pretty, twirling." I am so happy she let me pick her up. We are going to go to lunch at work and I tell her that her smile is the same gorgeous smile I remember.

Black: Non-dream
Blue: Non-lucid
Red: Lucid

Note: Been sick for the past few days now and just haven't had success with anything I do, still trying hard to keep my recall going though... Although there isn't any point for todays dream because I don't actually remember anything. Also the first night of trying Mugwort tea.

Dream - trying to get laid
So many sex dreams lately, I remember being in a pretty neat house in a room with an ex of mine. We were fooling around and I just can't seem to remember exactly what happened or any more details (I think the tea makes me feel really week and foggy in the morning) but I also feel like there was something important I'm missing right now... I can't quite explain it, the emotions were strong too, like I REALLY wanted her. I also think I woke up before anything intense happened. And I had the feeling that I was cheating on my gf but I couldn't stop myself :/ makes me feel a bit uncomfortable.

Backlog: 18 Feb

Yet another time where I couldn't make myself do a wbtb. Went to bathroom and took some lecithin in the least.

Slight alertness and not immediately falling asleep, but not quite a wbtb.

Fragmented recall:

At some very low level of lucidity, I see these DCs walking backwards, in a way I am playing the forward and backward in time by thinking about it, it's kind of subconscious (but I can relate my attention to that). Then, I decide I want to control back my own movements and go in the middle of the street to jump back and in time. My back jump doesn't quite follow the right trajectory so I jump forward and try to reverse the movement. Some cars are coming but I know it's ok.

Other stuff happens and get distracted and lose my lucidity. I then have major issues with gravity, in the meantime my awareness goes up. It's super strange it's like I am weightless, floating up and can't stop the movement, so have to hold on to a street pole. For a while, I am like a balloon going up no mass whatsoever. I get lost in thoughts about posting about gravity in lucid dreams and that I am having this weightless problem. Thinking seems to distract me from the issue and I acquire normal weight and am back at street level.

It's a nice day in some foreign looking town. I remember the candy store task, but at the same time feel that am running out of time. There is a street store with an indoor as well as outdoor section just ahead so I hurry towards it. The outside section has all sorts of nice sweet stuff like sweet rolls, mini panettone, etc. The indoors section sells more candy-like things. There's a DC working there and I tell her to quickly give me the strangest candy and she hands me a pack full of roasted coffee beans with sugar. Not exactly what I was hoping for, I make a mental note and wonder about the taste. Just about to consume them when I wake up.

A time travelling dream scenario with semi random elements. I see my friends as their younger selves and pay attention to one of them. His present self now appears in front of me and I tell him what I saw.

Fragments. Awareness gradually goes up as I discuss another time related change of personal in this cafe ahead. What's notable is I see myself in the mirror as a completely different person.

Can't remember more details but as my awareness gradually increases I detach myself from the situation and just continue walking around with no goal in mind. I end up in some sort of underground/tunnels that look a bit game like (think dwarf city, castles). The tunnels are averagely lit. My eyes tell me I've taken the wrong fork but I become more confident continuing ahead. I feel I am losing lucidity so just for the fun of it, decide to self assert and shout out loud that my body is asleep at this moment. I continue down the tunnel.

Slight apprehension as I feel something coming - just round the corner is a DC with two weird looking creatures much like wyverns. I pass right between them, they pay no attention to me. At some point in the tunnels I remember the candy store task again. Right ahead is a closed retro door and I think: "Why not, a candy store could be just behind it, think about this purposely and go ahead". I am happily surprised to find that the room indeed turns out to be a magically looking candy store. It has lots of colorful items, gemstones and candy, looks very fairy talish. No DC is working here, so I just grab the nearest weird looking small glass bottle full of gem-like looking candy.

Cute little aquamarine opaque pieces of this gem candy mixed with some sesame/flax seeds. I quickly pour them down my mouth making sure to empty the whole little bottle (meanwhile wondering did we have to consume the whole thing, remembering the bottle of wine task). I feel relieved at this point that I am able to properly chew them, taste them and not wake up. They taste really nice, like a caramelised sesame bar. I enjoy the moment a bit longer before the alarm wakes me up.

Think there was other cool stuff but can't recall.

It all started in a nice old house with me and a couple old friends I knew in waking life. we were all just talking about anything and fooling around. even if it was non-lucid. I could tell it was very heart warming just to be around these people. As usual, it was mostly girls since I guess it's my dream sign to have more than one girl as sort of the main plot of the dream.

As time goes on, weird things started happening in the house such as moving objects and one of my old friends (we will call her Ally) goes missing. I go to find her while everyone stays in the room to be safe. I find her with this guy

So I end up fighting him and at first lose horribly because he's strong as hell. And as he was about to drop her off the house, I turn to near the equivalent of half man half wolf with blue skin and dark blue hair with hairy sideburns and sharp teeth, Claws and all. I charge at him with such ferocity that even he was surprised. We have this true big battle while the others come in to see me changed and they become worried and shocked.

As time goes on, we become so weak that it starts to get very hard to continue. However, as muscular bound as he is, he finds the strength to pick me up and drop me on his knee, finally putting me out. Ally runs to me but the beast tries to take her. However, the others all take him on, and since he is so weak he cannot deal with them all at once so slowly but surely goes down as well. Everything fades out.

Next thing you know, I wake up with my head on Ally's lap with everyone with pure glee that I'm okay. I see the bandages on my stomach and Ally hugs me and everyone happily watches. I sat up afterwards and I began to make it comical again. We all start talking in funny accents and we then decide to leave the room. The dream then finally fades out.

Next dream was short, bitter, and sweet. It started with me and the same friends as before at my house in a cookout. We were downstairs playing games and seeing who can best each other. Ally, had to go up stairs to see her mother and the others decided to go with. I stayed downstairs and I think I started to meditate. In a short while, her mother starts screaming and hollering at people for hanging around a bad crowd (us ) and I go up stairs and see my mother watching and others began to cheer up. I head back downstairs and sat on a chair, and soon after (we will call this girl Kitty) and the others come down stairs along with Ally. Ally plopped on my chest still kind of crying saying it was horrible. I began to cheer her up and Kitty wasn't surprised that I heard all of that.

I told Ally to wipe her tears and before the dream fades out, she gives a nice smile at me.

This dream was sort of nice but sad. can't really remember the details but we were in a school building I guess and people were leaving or graduating. One girl in particular that I knew (Yuki) was leaving and me and her had a very long hug. she looks at me and kisses my cheek and heads out with her parents. I go to the bathroom to see my boys in the bathroom talking how one of them had sex with this awesome looking chick. (The hell did that come from?) meanwhile I'm sitting there kind of saddened by Yuki leaving and the dream fades out

The last dream I was lucid for only a minute and I shouted clarity and everything was clear. I plugged my nose and I could breathe. sadly I could walk a few steps before it dissipating.

Very heartwarming dreams. kind of made me happy and sad because these were high school friends I hunged out with a lot and miss. But yeah, hope you liked the read

I was in my home. I went outside, and looked around. It was grim, dark afternoon. The sky was overcast. I saw my family. Everyone was waiting for me. I asked what's going on, and they told me that we have to drive somewhere. We drove on a highway. It was really high above the ground. Suddenly, I found myself on the road. I looked around. It was midnight. We had a huge car accident. I don't know why, but something told me to run away. I saw that there's a sidewalk on the highway, but my way back was blocked by huge piles of sawdust. I climbed up, and ran on the sidewalk.

On the way I charged through layers of sawdust. After a while I heard someone following me. It was a group of my classmates. They were laughing for some reason, and shouting after me. I felt a little frightened, and I knew that they meant harm to me. I was running. After a short while the sidewalk was closed by fence and barbed wire. I knew that I was close to some kind of medical research facility. A top secret govrnment project. I was still escaping from the ambush of classmates.

Interpretation: The ambush composed of classmates might show that I feel somehow opressed and anxious around them, which makes me try to escape from them.

Notes: Its a recurring dream, but this time I ran away from the accident site, and ambush. In the past I was running to the accident site after hearing about my family. Also, no ambush before.

-I had to go to the bathroom. I don’t go to public restrooms IWL but I really had to go. The bathroom was so packed though and I almost gave up, when someone (mom?) pointed out an almost hidden room full of toilets.

It’s quiet and dim in there. I worry that someone will come in, but I barely hear noises from the other bathroom area, and they almost cease the more time I spend there.

As I look around, I see some bottle on a counter. Then I notice that a wind is making some things blow around. It’s kind of eerie but I immediately dismiss any scary ideas because…a haunted bathroom? No thanks.

I’m able to go, but for some reason it doesn’t take care of it! I end up going again. I repeat that twice more.

Inspiration: When I woke up, I really had to go.

-Mom needs to borrow some beads on a string that we need for something important. I go to my room, which is completely dark. I use my iPod Touch light and something else to see around. I grab my old beads for her and grab my own. They’re red and are too big for a wrist but too small for a necklace.

Something about water and moving back in that house. There are some broken rings and Rane is there.

There’s some kind of festival going on and people arrive for it. We’re all werewolves. We’re in this big house like my grandma’s IWL and I’m helping mom out.

As the people arrive, I quickly jump down from somewhere to the carport where mom is, and ask her what she needs me to do as the people walk up the drive. She gives me some task, so I jump back up to do it after kissing her cheek. Only, I end up knocking this roof type covering off and have to fix it, and someone helps me. I’m clumsy because I’m nervous.

I’m keeping away from some guy I saw in the group too.

I’m around the front porch area and there are three girls standing on the drive. One of them calls out to me, asking if I’m going to swim. I say no, because I don’t know how to. She taunts me about it and I keep calm at first, but she goes on and I snap and call her a bitch before I storm away.

Later, a woman and another girl appear. The girl had told on me to the woman. “She called her a bitch!” I respond sarcastically something like, “I would never say that word (that she just said)!” like that girl had done something way worse. The woman calls me out saying that she knows I’m lying.

I’m talking to a woman about swimming, and she says that she’s not swimming either and doesn’t know how to. She’d rather ‘be buried than drown’. I think that sounds a bit weird and repeat it to her for confirmation.

I’m working on something, bending over. I realize something isn’t right – I’m not wearing underwear, just a shirt. I remember that dad is nearby and quickly stand up and try to figure out what’s going on.

There was something about sparkles and candy too.

Inspirations: Werewolves from one of yesterday’s dreams, same with swimming. Think the no-undies thing comes from me taking off my boxers shorts last night from under my pajamas. Probably took place in a grandma’s house setting because mom told me she was going over there today.

My girlfriend turns into an evil demon creature and true to utterly destroy me in every way. She glares at me menacingly with a scary look in her eyes and dares me to do something about it. I tell her that I'm still going to look at the good in her and ignore the bad - and in that way gradually transform the effects she has on me. She develops large fangs, her eyes go black and she lunges at me to bite my face off, but I feel love for everyone, her especially, and just before she bites my face off, she is transformed into a beautify girl again and kisses me. I was expecting to die or be maimed, but this is definitely one of the best outcomes.

Now the two of us are waiting for some demonic, hellish creatures to clear out of the upstairs room. It seems like the more still I am, the more things seem to work out favorably. My girlfriend seems to be affected in some way by these creatures, and we can't just go up there and chase them out.

We lay back down in my hammock as we wait.

I wake up in my hammock and it all seemed SO real. Especially since she was next to me. Kind of eerily creepy how real I seemed. Maybe it was, who knows?

There was a video about child soldiers. They fought and murdered people but they were only children. Many of the older kids would lead the youngest ones around the battlefield by the hand.

A program is started to save them. Me and mom have some of them in the van with us, we’re either fostering them or taking them somewhere to be helped.

Mom starts talking to them about pop culture references that they know nothing about. She says that ‘Christina Aguilera is in a band called Looper’, and I was like ‘??? I didn’t think Christina was in a band…’

Inspirations: Thinking about Kony yesterday. Christina from watching The Voice. Looper maybe from seeing the movie was coming on a while back, but I’d already watched it before.

Two nights ago I dreamt that I was outide building a toilet out of wood and my dad was mocking me or something. He was annoying me and getting in the way.

Last night I dreamt I was in my room with my mom but we were dead. I was telling her how you could close your eyes and imagine a beautiful ring and when you open your eyes it will appear, because we were in "heaven". I did that a few times and it worked. Then my dad came in my room and all of a sudden I wasn't dead.. yet. There was an axe leaning against the wall and he took it and said, "I'm going to cut off your finger." and he did just that. It didn't hurt. Then he was going to kill us.. I woke up.

Now, my dad is the kindest, most caring dad out there and we never ever fight and I can't figure out why I'm having these dreams. Is there something I should know?

Non-luicid
2:00PM - 2:30PM nap
I'm at home, and it has just become spring. The temperature rises quickly, and I sweat. A lot.
"It's spring, but it feels like summer! I shouldn't have to be dealing with this right now!" I say, in vain. Sweat rolls down my face and drips off my chin.
I look down to see a pattern of blue eyes, six of them in three rows, that have been painted on the lower part of the wall. The black pupils are in the shape of hearts, and the eyes themselves are rimmed in black, with long black eyelashes.
Then, I wake up.
I know the nap was only 30 minutes, but it felt like it went on for hours.