non-lucid

I currently still have a major problem with nasal congestion which is wrecking most of my night-time attempts at dream recall, but I managed to grab one at the very top of the night.

9.00AM
A young beautiful woman is attracted to me...a sign of how ridiculous dreams can be. There was no sex but some kissing and the advantage of dreams is that (a) you don't feel guilty and (b) you can't be arrested...yet.

There was what seemed like a very weak separation scene (I don't recall saying "this can't go on...I'm too old for you." Perhaps she did...maybe my dream "nasal snuffling" finally turned her off) I think we were at an airport and she's moving off and I hang back, not wanting to seem that I'm following her. But she turns back and tells me that she's going somewhere to load some Christmas carols onto her phone and she wants me to tell her my favourites??????

Ed...is that the best you can do? Not even a decent soundtrack. She wasn't my type being (a) too young (b) beautiful. I've always preferred the older fuller-figured woman (but she had to be reasonably attractive...i.e better looking than Sylvester Stallone...as he is now) She looked a lot like Clara from Dr Who...so maybe I was playing the Dr (nice casting Ed. I got 14 years younger)

I'm making serious efforts to get over my current recall problems and outside distractions. Apart from the new mattress I've bought a silk sleep mask to counteract the blazing global-warming dawns streaming through my (lined) curtains. I'm waiting for the NHS to creak into action and confirm a specialist appointment, to confirm whether it's dust allergy or something more serious..

I've also ordered £150+ worth of air-purifying equipment for my bedroom. That will remove dust etc down to 3 microns. All that might do the trick. My sensitivity to REM arrival is now back to previous levels and I'm loving the long riverside walks (where the sight of me moving thoughtfully along like an intense philosopher and clearly talking to myself must cause some amusement)

If all else fails, there's plan K...we're moving to the coast next year. Our part of Essex was recently designated by the World Health Authority as the most polluted area of England...small wonder. For 100+ years the Essex marshes have been London's rubbish-dumping ground (heaven knows whats down there) Also, we're downwind of the Capital and, it that wasn't bad enough, we're under the flight-paths of three major airports. I'm living in England's Chernobyl !

So...not good, but nowhere near over. I'm in no rush. I may disappear from here for days or even weeks at a time but, barring the unforeseen I'll pop up whenever I've got some new development or a half-decent dream. Ever onward!

This was one of the most powerfully frightening and sleep episodes to date.

I'm floating in a sensory deprivation tank. I chose to do an hour and a half session since it had been a long day. This experience happened in the later half of the float.


I'm listening to music. It's sort of a slow, funky R&B beat with a man singing directly to me. He has a wonderful, deep voice that sent me deeper into my comfort zone. I realize quickly that this isn't the wake up music for my session, it is all in my head. I smile, or at least I think I do, and continue listening for a whole, beautiful minute. It's amazing what your mind can create in sensory deprivation.

The music fades and a twitch brings me back to present. "That was wonderful," I thought. "That's more than enough to write about."

Reflecting back on all this, I now know I experienced a false awakening, and a very convincing one at that. So, in my false awakening:

I'm going to flip onto my stomach for the last 30 seconds of my float (sometimes when I know I'm about to get out of the tank, I lay face down for as long as I can hold my breath. It feels good on my back). My extremities feel numb, but I manage to flip over. I soon realize I'm paralyzed. I have no control over my legs or arms and worst of all, my face is under water. I begin to panic. A hot rush of survival fear rushes me through my situation. My mouth is muffled by water and my arms can't find their way to bang on the wall for help. I'm going to die. I hold my breath as long as I can until I realize there is no use fighting it anymore. I have to inhale. I choose not to have my life flash before my eyes, since I knew inhaling the super saturated salt water would burn out any sentiment I could gather, so I just decided to go for it. A moment of courage. With all my strength, I take a mighty breath. Farewell.

Woosh. I'm back in my real body, frantically trying to catch my breath and calm my nerves. I knew exactly what had happened, having experienced false awakenings and sleep paralysis before. Never have both happened simultaneously. I was rattled, I still am.

I accepted death. Rather than inhaling the salt water, I took the most refreshing gasp I've ever tasted. It was beautifully humbling experience.

20.09.2014

Nazi freak offering treats (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I was at a hotel with my wife and we were watching a soccer match. For some reason, there was another lady with us and I could sense empathically that she was attracted to me. She was laying down in a different bad and I could see that she was not watching the match, but looking at me the whole time.

My wife got mad because she was too interested in me.

From here, I went with this lady to her house for some reason and she told me that she hopped her dad did not bother me and asked me to be open minded. As soon as I entered the house, I saw the living room. It had the colors of the German Flag. The couch was on the back of the room and right above it, there was a huge Nazi flag. I was shocked, and I realized that the energy there was very bad. There was a small table in front of the couch and it had various treats. I could see a bowl on the left end of the table that had chocolate treats with the shape of the svastica Nazi cross. In the middle of the table there were some pink donuts and some other odd candies.

I am not including pics here due the sensitiveness of the topic.

This girl told me she would check what I would eat because I could not like it at all. I grabbed a big cookie that was wrapped in a green plastic bag. The ingredients where wassabi, green peppers and chocolate. I did not feel like eating it.

I kind of felt uncomfortable and I told him that I liked some Spanish dictator. But then I got afraid because I thought that maybe he could hate me or kill me because Spain also fought against the Nazi. I left the place before getting in trouble.

From here, I went online to teach LDing to some of my students, followed by a few FAs where I wrote down this dream.

England in the 1940s or so, I'm disembodied and watching a man and a woman singing a duet in a garden. Both of them are thinking about a man named Dyson. They were friends when they were younger, but he left the country years ago and they haven't heard from him since; in their memories, he's a sort of ideal. I'm thinking how disappointed they would be if they were to see him now.

When their song's over, they talk with the people who'd been listening. The woman who'd been singing is speaking to a particular man, very wealthy, and hinting that she's expecting him to invite her along to a particular event. But although they clearly have some kind of history, he finds this suggestion laughable - he hardly even thinks of her as a woman. I'm surprised, since I'd just been thinking about how beautiful she is - the dream image had zoomed in on her profile as she was talking to him, and I'd been admiring the curve of her nose, the softness of her hair. Very beautiful. But the man walks off with most of the others - they're heading back toward the house. The man she'd been singing with comes up to her and says he saw her talking to that wealthy guy, and how they seem to get along well. She says, "Sure do."

My POV turns around, not following them - I'm focusing on the opposite direction. On a hill overlooking the garden, there's a man who'd been hiding among the trees and bushes, watching them. This is Dyson.

Morning of September 20, 2014. Saturday.



I seem to be passively viewing an investigation, though I am still present in the setting, which seems to have the essence of the northeast corner of the Cubitis living room (where I am not been sine 1978). It seems to be taking place in a corner of a first-floor room at two perpendicular desks. Two unknown young females are talking about a telephone being tapped. They seem uncertain about what they are doing. When a number is given by one to the other, she complains that it is a private number (supposedly indicated by starting with 392), as it seems it was supposed to be related to a business telephone, possibly a bank or loan company operating illegally. It is decided that at least one of them will pretend to be a call girl from the service already known by this other person. She sets up a meeting pretending to be from their usual escort service.

---

My dream shifts to a hotel room (fourth floor or higher) in a different type of dream scenario and where I am more present. My wife Zsuzsanna is now with me. Curiously, Tom Welling is here in his Clark Kent persona (from “Smallville”). He also seems to be some sort of amateur investigator. It is presently nighttime. In the distance, viewed through the hotel windows, is a very large building that creates the impression of also being like the model of a city. There is one large belfry that is more like a towering apartment. Tom aka Clark seems to be indicating that one of the criminals under investigation (a corrupt banker) is living there. I seem to know it is where Bruce Wayne lives. I casually say “That is where Bruce Wayne, Batman, lives.” Suddenly, I realize that I should not have said that, as now Clark knows the superhero identity of Bruce Wayne. I walk more to the corner of the room saying “Whoops…pretend I did not say that”.

Clark appears to be puzzled. Apparently, he has never heard of either Bruce Wayne or Batman. I guess it may not matter what I said. I absentmindedly (remembering the comic books) ask him if this is Earth A, B, or C and he replies with “C”.

I realize that I have altered history, because now, I notice that there is a black leather outfit lying on one of the two beds (the one farthest from the door) which seems like a prototype of a Batman costume. It seems that Clark Kent will now become Batman instead of Superman because of me talking about Batman. However, it also soon seems that Clark is partly in that outfit, but he is “disintegrating” in a similar manner as the monsters in “Little Monsters” do when exposed to light. One of the arms is still flopping around but Tom is mostly gone.

Suddenly, the mood of my dream shifts and I attempt to make a comedic exit. I sing the old television “Batman” theme: “DO do DO do DO do DO do, DO do DO do DO do DO do…Batman!”

As I leave the hotel room, I see Zsuzsanna and our children sitting at computers in an open room of which is part of a hall, which seems to be part of my old apartment on King Street. I go into the small hallway bathroom and after a short time I hear (seemingly from out of nowhere) Ian McKellen shouting “That’s the consequence of being a thumb…and ANGULAR!”.

---

The dream state indicators are of course the beds, which do not symbolize anything other than the subliminal memory of having fallen asleep. Dream state indicators are a very common factor in my dreams and have nothing to do with “interpretation”.

The emergent consciousness factor is the feature of the computers in the last scene, where my conscious self identity is beginning to become active in the waking transition.

My dream resolves in the last scene of being a typical bathroom wake-up call. Originally, I had not delved into some of the meaning in this dream so as not to offend people, but the remark shouted at the end is of course a reference to men urinating and potentially being off the mark, although unlike the experiences reported by other people, I have rarely ever used a toilet in a dream as this dream type is to induce RAS mediation to wake and attend to biological needs. (“Penis” is replaced by “thumb” and the reference to “angular” relates to the stream not always being straight. It reminds me of the old joke. “Our aim is to keep this bathroom clean. Your aim will help.” There is even the childhood Batman bathroom joke as related to the theme song just before the final scene.)

The scene with Clark dissolving on the bed is, in addition to being the usual vestibular system symbolism (associations with flight in this case), also associated with “Little Monsters”, which in turn is an association with being in the dream state. It symbolizes the ephemerality of the fictional dream self.

---

Given I went to bed at 2:00am last night, I'm surprised I had any recall at all.

Anyways, I am with a group of astronomers, two I believe. I recall they are looking at this very large blue star in a nearby galaxy that they call Kipo 581.
There was something to do with them studying it. They were trying to prove that they could learn everything about it only using old fashioned astronomy techniques.
Something to do with them giving up on old astronomy techniques. They got in contact with NASA and launched a new telescope into orbit. The telescope was supposed to see if there were planets in orbit around the star.

Dream

I'm with Josh, Daryl, Kayley and Adrian. They're all smoking cigarettes. I walk up to Adrian have a convocation with him. I remember saying something about being unsure if it's scientifically proven, and Fasting.

Myself and Adrian are flying around on something. He's controlling it. We're after some kind of Diamond (Spider man Unlimited). We go towards one that's on a building lookout. We miss the diamond and crash into the wall. We're fine and not injured.
I'm now on the ground and can see two people walking on the sidewalk. They're dressed up as a Jedi. They're both wielding light sabers. The man in front's light saber is over sized.

I'm now in a street near what is meant to be Ben's house. I think I'm with Daryl and someone else. I walk over to Ben and his girlfriend. He's girlfriend is naked. I can see her breasts and ass. She's kind of squatting down and I can see her pussy. She's hot and I'm having sexual thoughts.

Dream 1

I'm with Josh and I have some pre-workout. I meet up with Daryl and he seems to be excited that I have taken some pre-workout. He opens up a wrapper which has some kind of narcotic in it. I seem pretty amped up from the pre-workout and go straight in for a dip of speed.

We're now driving and a police car begins chasing us. Daryl is driving and he doesn't stop for the cop, instead he tries to flee. I tell him he's an idiot and that he should stop the car. There's a few times where we almost get captured but we seem to get away each time. I recognize the street we're driving down, which is where my Auntie Rita lives.

Eventually we get caught and end up in some kind of venue. I think it's a TAB (Betting Place). There's cops around us and we try to swindle a deal so we can get off the charges. The charges consist of illegal betting and driving offenses. We pay back the TAB what we took from them, and ask how much extra do they want to drop the charges. I think we're looking at 1,200 or maybe a bit more. We agree with the price. There's two cops which seem to be corrupt, definitely one of them for sure. He's bald. We can see a bowl of cocaine which belongs to the police officer, and Josh decides to have a dip. The corrupt cops tells Josh that it's baking soda or something and laughs. I think he was having us on, and that it was actually cocaine.

I remember seeing a scene of the cop being behind a door. The door timber looks brittle and myself and the cop are ripping the timber off of it.

I'm now at some other house, doing something. I can see a kid.

Another scene of being at a house. I can see the same kid as before. I see a scene of a mansion and a guy inside it. He's the owner of the house. I move closer to the scene and notice the guy in a bed with multiple females. The whole bed is plain white. The man is under the covers with one of the females. They seem to be hugging one another, while the rest of the females are getting pedicures while browsing on a laptop. The pedicure is being done by some type of machine, which runs automatically.

The scene begins to fly through the house into the backyard. The backyard has lots of people and looks lavish. I can see some weird stuff. There's a few toilets which are lined up next to each other. They move back and forth across the garden.
I walk over to a track that long jumpers run down to perform their leap. There's a car that looks similar to a remote controlled car. It's going back and forth on the track. At first I thought it was going to run straight into me, but stops just in time.

Dream 2

I'm at a beach and I can see Daryl, Thomo and some other person. They're near a volleyball net. I can see a group of people coming towards me in the distance. They look familiar. I remember that Thomo is having his bucks party and that I can't attend. I think about what I can say to him, and feel I should tell him I can't afford it. The group of people arrive where I am, and I'm greeted by most of them. One of them looks like Jamie Smyth and he is so happy to see me. We hug one another.

I'm now at the local football oval, standing where you sit to watch it. I see the group that I saw earlier here. They're heading to a beach. A name is announced, and that person is the first to go in the water. It ends up being a kid. He doesn't want to be the first one to go in.
I grab a cup and piss in it. I walk with the cup over towards some people. I pretend to drink it to gross them out.

Dream - Lucid

Something about turtles. That's all I remember.

~

I was at school sitting in a classroom. It was my first class on my first day. I was having to repeat my junior year of high school. I had already taken the class I was in. I was thinking that all my friends were seniors now and they were all going to graduate before me. I then was thinking that I had only had to repeat a few classes and that I would still graduate with them.

I then was outside in the parking lot trying to find a parking spot. I was driving a white and yellow paper van; it was like I was just guiding it with my hand like a toy rather than actually driving it. I guided it into a parking spot, then decided to pull it through to the one in front of it.

Then something about Kermit the Frog and the football stadium. He had gotten everyone together for something, either a game or some kind of pep rally, I'm not sure; at any rate, it was something he always did every year, and everyone had a good time at it. He then started to tell everyone to go home. He had given up on it for some reason, and when confronted and asked to not cancel it, he was very adamant about his decision.

~

Something about animals at some park/safari thing. The signs when you entered it looked like the font and style of Jurassic Park. I don't remember too much other than someone having to keep knocking out these miniature animals for some reason. I want to say the miniature animals were some sort of big cat, but I'm not entirely positive. One kept waking up, and they had to keep hitting its head against the wall to knock it out. It just wouldn't get knocked out. There were other types of knocked out animals as well.

19.09.2014

Lucid Chocolates (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I was in some sort of campus and I was sharing with some of the students how to lucid dream and all the advice I could give them about that topic.

After the class, I went outside and sat on some stone-made picnic table and someone approached at me and informed me he had develop a new product that would help to lucid dream. He handed me a box of chocolates that aid lucid dreaming. I could read on the box:

"Blocks up to 100 subconscious thoughts preventing lucid dream."

It looked something like this:







The box was priced for $28.99 and I felt it was a bargain.

My grandma was in the dream as well as Narayan (a hindu guy who owns a Buddhist store that I used to be a Psychic Reader at.) They were moving the store to some place else.

A group of traveling weird people invited me to ride with them on their caravan and talked with me. They gave me a peanut butter powder and I told them that I hate peanut butter. After the ride was over they made really good food for me. Later, a man tried to kidnap me. In the dream a blind man wanted to marry me and he tried to kidnap me , and my brother Peter protected me from him we were running and the blind man was chasing me. I was wearing a green dress and looking in a mirror and running around and I found my mom and brother Peter and we were on an ice-covered lake and I did a double or single (I dont remember) toe loop jump I was wearing ice skates (I want to be a figure skater) and almost bumped into someone, and then when we went off the ice Peter was gone so we (me and my mom) were looking for him, and it turned out he was under some rocks or logs and he was sopping wet and drowning, and I wanted to help him get out but then the dream morphed to a place where I was wearing a bra that was way to small on me and asking my mom for the dress that I was wearing earlier. There was a lot of weird things going on good and bad, but I forgot them, so I'll let go of this dream it was both good and bad I woke up from it at 5:20 am.

Later I had a dream that I was at a gymnastics class the teacher was spotting me doing back handsprings and front handsprings but we were in water. After I got out of the water I looked for the big mat that my martial arts school has and when I couldnt find it someone said that someone took it to their house for the summer, so I did front handsprings and back handsprings without a spotter, but at one point I was frozen and couldnt do a back handspring, but I could do a front handspring (usually I can only do them with a spotter, I have only had 2 gymnastics classes).

Morning of September 19, 2014. Friday.



In my dream, I am in a seemingly unknown building though of which has aspects as a possible composite that includes the Cubitis living room and our present home’s living area. At one point, there is some sort of telephone call or paging for me, but the call comes from some sort of intriguing larger coin-operated video game of the kind from the mid-1980s. This does not seem unusual to me. I press a button under the top front edge of it to take the call by way of a small hidden microphone and the (unrecognized and remaining unknown) caller’s voice comes from the speaker of the machine.

Supposedly, I am to do some sort of job which may relate to mowing and maintaining a public building. I had done work like this (with several others) in a previous dream at either a shopping mall or hospital (or both in being in the same area). There seems to be something else, though - something mysterious and possibly relating to another job regarding surveillance or detective work.

My voice sounds a bit unusual; not like mine, but like a fairly young boy’s (though not like I really sounded as a boy). In any case, the caller says that I sound like Steve Finch and for a time, thinks I am him. (I know of no one with this name in reality.)

Over time, I try to speak more “correctly”, though the caller still thinks I may be the other person. Oddly enough, I am supposedly the actor Bruce Willis. At least, I seem to think I am to some degree in my dream (without any seeming pretense). I explain that I have a “voice modulator” - so this is why I sound as I do. I tell him that I have forgotten how to turn it off.

We arrange some sort of meeting with a “guard” of some kind. Supposedly, this guard is a representative and “protector” of a certain type of dream environment in another location of the supraconscious as well as being some kind of judge of dream workers. Oddly though, I do not relate it to the fact that I may be dreaming at the time so I never become lucid. I am to meet her in another location, which is apparently like some sort of portal to other types of dream states. Even though I will be instantly killed if I do not meet with her approval, I do not seem to be worried by my state of mind relating to the unexplained and dreaming itself due to my continuous and validated experiences with remote-viewing and precognition since earliest memory.

There is soon another person who explains this to me; an older unknown female on my left. We walk to an area near a small wooden fence where the “guard” is to judge me. One section of the fence is broken, but that does not seem ominous in any way. As this unknown female approaches, I maintain a very precise and clear open and honest perspective, wanting to express all of myself with full sincerity to “automatically” avoid my potential destruction (in short, by just “being me”). She towers over me - over twice my height (not as a giant, but as I am now seemingly of a child’s perception with an amazingly clear memory and orientation of when I was that size). She seems almost like a bag lady at this point. (She also reminds me somewhat in afterthought of the crossing guard from when I lived on Rose Street at age five.) She soon approves of me, allowing me to live and to continue dreaming, this being because of my lifelong connection to the unexplained and my sincere interest in the mysteries and meanings of dreams, it seems.

Before she leaves, I ask her about how precognition works. I ask if it is related to “threads”, like individual threads of a spider web, from both the potential future, and the “threads” of prior thought and memory simultaneously aligning in the present (in the sense of a fractal equation balancing out) - in other words, the human mind as a “spider” picking up the subtle “vibrations” in distant parts of the “spiderweb” or the event horizon of the theoretical future. I probably do not clearly explain myself as she shakes her head “no” in a very subtle way (but does not at all seem displeased) before walking off as my dream slowly loses cohesion. It may be that she did this to express that she did not have the time to answer any of my questions regardless of what they were.

Dream - Lucid

I was in some video game when I became lucid. The lucidity lasted for a bit, but all I can remember from it was asking a Nicholas Cage,
"Tell me who you really are!"
He looked at me with a straight face, and responded with something like
"You don't want to know."
We talked some more, but I started to feel like I was talking out loud in my sleep.

I then woke up in another dream, laying on a pull-out couch. I asked whoever else was there, I think it was my brother, if I had been talking in my sleep. He said he didn't hear anything.

~

I was at work in the bakery, but, as usual, it looked nothing like the bakery does IWL. We were by a checkout counter. Someone asked me if I would mix the dough. I told them no, I wouldn't, it was too scary. The reason I said that it was scary was because when someone went to mix the dough, they had to go to a different part of the store. They had to travel through dark, creepy, cave/maze-like areas with enemies that would shoot you. You had to be armed and shoot them before they killed you. It was kind of like Doom/Goldeneye 64. The area where you mixed was also threatened by enemies. I told them that last time I did it, I was sitting down, trying not to fall asleep with my shotgun because enemies kept coming. I "remembered" this happening. I didn't want to go through that again. I preferred the safety of the bakery. There was a guy there who had been doing it every day. He held his own pretty well and was much more of an expert on it than me.

My manager then tried to toss me some frozen dough to take to the mixer. I don't remember what I did or said.

I then was really close to an enemy, an archer who slightly resembled King Graham from the Kings Quest games. His back was turned to me. I was trying to sneak up on him and throw him in the lava. I was being quiet, until I made a small noise. He heard it and turned around. We fought a little, but I don't remember much about it.

I then was going through the dark area for some reason. I had the guy in front of me who went all the time. I was shooting at enemies with a laser. I then started to get shot at, and my laser stopped working, so I turned around and ran the other way to get out of the enemy's sight. I looked down at my laser, and it was a Wiimote. When I'd fire it with the A button, the light on the Wiimote would turn red, signaling to me that I was too far away from a Wii for it to work. As I was turning a corner, a bullet grazed me, and it really hurt! That too was part of the reason I didn't like doing the dough; it hurt when you got hit, though if you died, you'd respawn.

I then saw this open part of the maze to the dough. It was very dark there. There were people there with different colored lights all down the middle of the room to direct us where to go. They also had to defend themselves from the enemies. I saw a top view of this room, and then I was at the beginning of the room. I didn't go to far into the room. I also saw, at some point, a view of a room from some stairs.

I then was at the checkout again. Someone came and asked if they had different dough runners, and they said yes. I then saw a shelf with bowls of dough on it for each day of the week, each with a different name on it. I really hoped my name wasn't up there. I looked, and didn't see it. I was, for some reason, a little disappointed, even though I didn't really want to do it.

~

I was at what was supposed to be my house, but it looked nothing like it. I kept thinking about the weed I had from a while ago that was in the top drawer of this white three drawer organizer I have. I kept thinking about when I was going to smoke it. I was then in my room, which looked like the room of my first apartment. I opened the drawer, and the bag was in there with some weed in it. I "remembered" when I bought it. I had recently smoked, maybe a few weeks prior, so my sobriety was already blown. I didn't want to smoke it inside though because it would smell like weed, and my roommates might not appreciate it. I then thought about how this woman who was living there, an older woman, liked weed, and wondered if I should ask her to smoke with me. She was there currently, the only other one home but me. I didn't ask her.

I then briefly woke up, still half in the dream world, thinking that I didn't really have any leftover weed. As I eased back into the dream world, I thought that of course I did. I went and checked again, and there it was.

Then, there was this tall, young black man in our kitchen. He had a Jamaican accent. He was yelling at us about something that we did wrong. It had something to do with work. He was mostly getting mad at two of my roommates who weren't there currently. He was yelling more and more, when finally, I had had enough and chimed in.
"Shut up! Shut the fuck up!"
I continued to yell at him, saying other things, throwing around a lot of profanities. He kept yelling also. There was one point where I was standing on a chair in front of him. I grabbed his face in my hands, which somehow corresponded to a TV screen, like this was being recorded or something, and told him that the roommates (who were an FFX character, Lulu, and someone I knew it college) were my friends, and he needed to leave them alone. The chair almost fell backwards at one point. I figured I'd probably get in trouble for this, but I didn't care; this guy was insulting people I loved. I also kept thinking that now since I was so mad I was definitely gonna smoke that weed that day.

The guy turned around and left, and I was now in the kitchen with Adam, the guy from college who was apparently my roommate, and one of the people the Jamaican man was yelling about. He was doing something by the stove. He was wearing a glittery brown plaid hat. I told him what happened. I then told him I loved his hat.
"It's so..." I started to say, when he interrupted and said
"Gay?" (IWL he is gay)
"You just wear it well!" I said.
"Thank you," he said.

~

It's interesting how after not smoking for almost two years I am still having these dreams about smoking. I guess it was such a huge influence in my life for so long, and well, it's an addiction that I've been battling for 5 years now. I guess the dreams just come with the territory.

9/19/14

Last nite, bed 8pm - 4:30am

DR 1:30am

I am in a building and a nearby volcano is exploding. We see lava and black lahar cloud getting closer. Lots of smoke, fire, chaos. We are trying to grab our things and get out. I don't really feel the urgency or danger.

I am taking part in a scientific study that looks at how to prevent another 9/11 type attack. They are researching building materials that can resist aircraft crashing into them.
The test takes place on a flat, tropical island that is mostly an open, grassy plain. There is a small base in one corner of the island and there are mock skyscraper frames, two of them nonetheless erected in the center.
And I am to pilot two defective military UAVs into the towers, one into each tower, just like 9/11. I remember it being like some sort of video game, where I was controlling the UAV in third person. On my first pass, I actually missed, so I came around and stalled the aircraft above the tower coming down on top. The test was still conclusive and the scientists said the material seemed strong enough. They wanted me to fly another aircraft into the other tower though.
I lined up the aircraft and gunned the engine full throttle wanting to put these materials to the test. I hit the tower hard enough that I managed to bend a few of the supports.
The scientist appreciated that I did the second test at a different speed. He said that he had gotten some good data.

FA. My roomie (we'll call him D) says there has been a snowstorm. Three inches of snow. All classes cancelled. I look out the window and see that he is correct.
I drive home from college on weekends, so I may as well drive home now. D says the storm is going to continue all the way to sunday. I tell him that If I don't leave now, conditions are only going to get worse. I get my keys and start to leave.