non-lucid

I am outside my old childhood house. Daytime (though the sky is more gray). Colors are dulled out the dream world feels flat, blurry, and generally low quality. I am already semi-lucid due to a gradual climb through lucidity that has happened over the course of a long dream of which I am only recalling the tail end of. I recall flying around, having some rather typical trouble with my flying powers with them being slow and very low to the ground but with some concentration, I am able to work past them. (I don't know why this is. I always seem to have these difficulties when flying now, but I always seem to be able to work past them.)

I attempt to explain to some dream characters (this brown-haired girl who was moving boxes out of a house a few lots down from mine) that this was a lucid dream. At first she doesn't believe me but after flying in circles around her a few times; doing some loops and flying through the branches of some trees I manage to get her attention that something is off and eventually fully convince her.

At this point, I begin explaining the nature of lucid dreaming to her in a pretty imprecise and incomplete manner. I explain the basic concepts of MILD, DILD and WILD, dream journaling, and dream stabilization. I then start demonstrating some basic dream control by summoning small items by reaching behind my back and grabbing them. I summon an apple and a bottle of some kind of alcoholic beverage that comes in this purple and blue glass bottle with crystals growing off of it and give them both to her. The dream scene transitions to a very distorted cafe/resturant enviroment where we are sitting on a large sofa and there are a lot of robots/ andriods. The lighting in the scene is very harsh; light and dark coming in through a big vertical window.

At some point I sit down on the couch and sink into it until I fall through the floor. I look up and see the resturant enviroment above me floating in a white void with some faint clouds. (It sort of looks like in a video game when you clip out of the world and fall through the floor). I begin flying once more but wake up not long after.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

I encounter Evangelion's wife and we have a nice talk and she invites me over their house. Then she calls Evangelion and she tells him I am coming over and how it's the chance they wanted to have a threesome with me. I am shocked and then relieved about my affair with him (from a dream the other night). I also wonder if she found out and is just trying to fix it in a positive way or if she has no clue and simply also desires me. Anyway I am up for it.

Created Friday 10 July 2020

I got two DILDs and a scrap today.

Spoiler for Kinda long:

Scrap Group 1
Dreams where I was conversing with some mystical being.

Dream 1 - Deadly Prank and Flight Radio LD

The visuals started a bit blurred. Spectator mode. This depicted an episode of Spongebob Squarepants. The title character and his friend Patrick were in an unknown apartment suite. The two were in a make believe game of hero and villain, Spongebob acting as the former, and Patrick the latter. However, Patrick got so engrossed in the game, that he started to believe he himself was really a villain. Things started getting dangerous when the starfish left deathtraps in every room. Spongebob was eventually cornered. As he cowered, Patrick loomed towards him with a nasty looking weapon. The insane starfish drew closer and closer... only to immediately drop the whole matter as if it never happened. Spongebob, with a sigh of relief, also laughed away his own near-death experience.

Around this point, I manifested on the floor of the suite's kitchen. I was exhausted, so I didn't even bother trying to get up. There were a few other voices, but I didn't pay attention. Soon, a fluffy medium sized dog trotted along right up to me. It got too curious for my liking. I was afraid it was going to bite me. But instead, it simply licked my face. This got me to question my environment, and thus, I quickly gained awareness.

Springing to my feet, I rushed to a room at the far end, then jumped out of an open window. I found myself flying over an expansive city surrounded by grassy hills, all under a clear dawn sky. Among the more interesting sites were two or more amusement parks, as well as an airport carelessly built between a few skyscrapers. Quite a view, especially considering that my visuals clarified by this point.

I opted to form rigid metal wings on my back just for the fun of it. Just then, I received a radio message internally (not unlike Codec calls in Metal Gear Solid).

"This is the US Air Force", says a male voice, his words muffled a bit by static. "If you can understand me, leave this airspace or we well open fire."

Well, this never happened before. I figured he thought I was some kind of alien.

"Permission to land.", I responded promptly, filtering my voice to sound inhumanly deep.

It took a moment before I received another message. "...alright.", the voice says skeptically. I don't think he expected me to talk.

Anyway, I looked for a safe, flat landing spot outside the city. But, there was nothing of the kind. The dream destabilized, and collapsed shortly after. DEILD attempt two minutes later, though I dozed off.

Dream 2 - July 2020 TOTM Basic Task I

Scene 1 - Game Gear Idea Awareness
The visuals started blurred. I was resting on the floor of an apartment suite similar to above. Dazzling sunlight forced me to half-open my eyes. There was some commotion going on in another room nearby, as well as noise from people getting started with their day. I just wanted to get some sleep, that is, until I started questioning my state. As a test, I meditated in an effort to float up as I laid supine. It took some effort, but eventually, I did levitate. This easily affirmed the dream.

I was about to head out the door, when I spotted this dude (olive skin, dark, unkempt hair) playing something on a Game Gear. On closer inspection, he had a Sonic game loaded. This got me to sound music from the series. The first in mind was Aquatic Ruin Zone from Sonic 2. I then had the idea to visit that very location. With an unusual combination of focus and anticipation, the scenery warped.

Scene 2 - A Visit to an Aquatic Ruin
The visuals were clearer. I instantly found myself just where I wanted, a lifelike version of Aquatic Ruin Zone, sunlight seeping through the foliage. This did indeed appear as the crumbling walls of an ancient city overrun by tropical wilderness. The air was heavy with vapor, though I never did directly see a body of water as per the namesake of this location. Anyway, as I floated around, I decided to pull down a nearby branch to touch the leaves. They were surprisingly sharp on the edges. I then noticed big red berries growing on the branches, the very same ones from the game. Of course, I wanted to sample them. Unfortunately, an unseen force dragged me out before I could do so. Cue another warp.

Scene 3 - Mountain Breaking Wave
The visuals were perfectly clear. I was standing by a road between some hills and a thin forest, a partially cloudy blue sky above. Various different locales were in the distance. To the far right were the shores of a beach. A city spanned out throughout the rest of the horizon, their skyscrapers notably larger than normal.

I took a moment to appreciate the view, when I quickly went over some tasks in my mind. I settled for this month's basic task i. Of course, that meant I had to find a mountain. I walked towards the left alongside the road. It didn't take long for me to notice a huge, ice-peaked bluish grey mountain leftwards to the horizon. After a brief moment of concentration, I released my aura. It was visually tame, appearing as just a quick, transparent wave that pulsed in the air for a moment. So it came as a bit of a surprise when the mountain crumbled seconds later. Job well done, I thought.

Regardless, I wanted to see such destruction more closely. With an upward wave of my hand, I collected as much asphalt as I could from the road to create a huge hill made of the same material. Once again, I conjured my aura. In an instant, the asphalt mountain exploded violently into millions of chunks. Some of the larger clumps almost flew right at me.

Perhaps I got startled a bit. The dream collapsed shortly after.

Spoiler for Aquatic Ruin Zone:

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7/10/2020
Took melatonin and B-complex vitamins
Fell asleep at 12:45-1AM.
Woke up at 6:30AM, woke up, went pee, Used SSILD
Woke up at 8AM, with recall, fell asleep
Woke up at 9:30AM, with recall. Wrote down all the dreams I remembered

What to work on: SSILDing for longer when trying to fall back asleep
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Dream 1+2(Working for Riaz then first class, making pizza for uncle.): I was working at big cheese and the makeline was set up very differently. We were doing things like making sides and prepping pizzas but Riaz was doing all the topping. I imagined thats why he can keep his stats so good at such a high volume store, he controls everything. He finished up and we clocked out really early at like 5:30, I thought thats all he really needs to keep the store profitable, he'd rather spend his time doing other things with the extra time. Another time I was at first class and I remember Ana letting her hair down with no hairnet after her shift near the food. At one point my uncle(maybe an employee too) wanted a pizza. I was helping him make a pizza and got the order of things all wrong. I ended up with the dough at the bottom of a bucket and pouring some sauce on top. I thought I had to make more wings too but there were some in the fridge.

Dream 3(Austin comes over for food, slaps me, I bring him outside to talk, grapes): I was chilling on the driveway or garage and Austin came up to us looking for to hang out or get some food. We went inside and I realized its because he has no food at home. I offered him everything and he ended up with like a ice cream drumstick and some orange ice cream/popsicle looking thing. I got near him and he slapped me with the orange thing. I asked him why he would do that and then told him to follow me and I brought him outside onto the front lawn. I again tried to get an explanation and then he left. I felt so bad for him, wasting the only food he had at the moment just because he was angry. Then Pheobe helped clean me up and tried to cheer me up by saying well make chocolate covered grapes. I remember just sitting or lying down feeling sad for Austin.

I'm inside of a building, in Jersey City, NJ. I'm on the top floor. Two man pass by and grab red condoms, one each, from a basket near the exit door. They exit the room, and I'm watching from behind. I aproach the door and across the stair I see a man sleeping in a hospital bed. My vision zooms in, and I could see clearly is John Travolta. He is sleeping deeply after a long travel; I notice he is too close to an edge of the small room, sure enough he rolls over the bed rails and falls to a deeper ground level. I see how he rolls in his blanket, like a burrito, until I loose sight of him. I levitate down towards him and try to focus my view, since is darker in this area. I see him getting out of a small door, he seems confused, and I help him getting back to bed, then I exit the room.

To say the two women had no distinguishing features would be a lie. But it was unimaginably dark the moment we headed down the corridor, there was never a chance I could see their faces. We passed a door to the left that opened to a small bathroom. The glass door at the other side of the corridor was the only visible thing in the darkness. The mood was abnormally silent and eerie. They stopped before a door to the right about halfway through. When I went inside, I saw only a bed and a couch in an otherwise empty room. The two women spoke between themselves while I found myself comfortable.

The both of them were well versed in lucid dreaming. I saw a person standing beside me, perhaps another student? I tried to listen to their lessons and attempted to become lucid. We would gather each night for our sessions. Every time the lesson ended, our teachers would lead us back down the corridor into a separate bedroom. I never knew who the women were, their names, nor were they in any way familiar to me. They were very patient with us, however. We would always practice during the late hours of the night.

Sometimes, the place we stayed in changed overnight. One time we slept inside a vacant office. The room had a series of shelves around its walls with nuts, bolts, and other stuff, and a desk with a small T.V. There was a cooking show on screen about an Argentinian chef preparing an alluring sauce. Another time we were sitting outside the women's porch. I remained puzzled as to how it was we kept changing places.

A ghost resided in the house. The first time I saw it, it had brushed past us while we were on the corridor. The ghost would always follow the same route from the glass door to the bathroom. Though it never materialized, I believed it was a small child. The women were aware of the ghost but did not feared it. The ghost never bothered with our lessons, but I never stopped being scared of it.

During one particular night, one of the women delved into the many methods for attaining lucidity. Sitting on the couch the two practitioners guided us through their teachings. Suddenly, I could mentally see each lesson like choices on a menu screen. From the five on display (which I can't remember), I decided on the first one and gave it a chance. Immediately my body went numb, as if with sleep paralysis. An ever growing pressure settled on both sides of my neck. Anxious, I tried to shake it off, but my body would not move. As if responding to my fear, the pressing subsided. When we finished that night, one of the women stood beside me and thanked a disembodied presence for our well-being.

* * *

I try moving my hands but notice they are tied to a pole. It is very dark in here, wherever I am. I am, again, bordering on the threshold of lucidity. I remember discussing lucid dreaming with two other people. We don't seem to have a body with us while the conversation takes place.

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

Been away for a while now. I've had this troubling theme of war and big bombs.

I'm by some kind of half circled arena and there is a kid in the middle. He is to show us his invention and there is a prize to the person who has the best invention. He shows us his rocket and it starts. It flies up in the sky and there is a big explosion, but it doesn't end there. There is another rocket coming from the explosion and one more time. After some explosions there is only a very small rocket left. This small rocket fires of the biggest explosion of them all. The kid won the competition and got a golden slipper.

I'm by an army camp and they are training for war. There is a big airplane flying very close to the ground and it's releasing big bombs of different sizes and shapes. I think it's weird that it isn't only loaded with one kind of bomb.

I'm by our summer place and I fly with some people. I'm not that good and it's really hard to fly. I don't even manage to fly off the ground. This was a scary dream but I don't remember what was scary.

Notes: Me and my mom talked about war and it's negative effects.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

Semi-lucid jumps through different times and places. E.g. Watching some japanese kids graduation ceremony in a school.
Then staying a while at a really nice place where people from my sangha are settling. There are two locations with bungalows in green hills. I am staying in one, but taking a bus to the other, out of curiosity. In there people are gathering in the garden and enjoying a spontaneous party. It gets late for me to go back to my location, so I kinda stay there, but no place to sleep.

I reencounter Evangelion, he is married now, but we kiss and without much talking we plan to see each other secretly. To avoid text messages and phone calls, he subscribed to a local paper I just had with me and we post ads with appointments to meet that only we can understand. The location is a kind of a motel in a train station. We meet there. We don't talk much. We start getting comfortable, I prepare to take a shower, but he challenges me to talk for a bit. So we lay down in bed and talk. He asks me if I have any big regret. I think hard and first say no, but then start telling him the story about Wolfboy and how we were in love and he proposed to me. Someone knocks on the door. I go check and see a woman looking angry. It's not his wife, so I open, but in an angle she can't see Evangelion anyway. She asks if I am alone, I say yes, she calls me a liar, says she heard two voices talking and one was a man. I say go away and shut the door to her face. But there is another door on the back and someone knocks there too. I tell Evangelion to hide as I send her away but she just barges in with another woman, they see him crawling away but don't see who he is. Anyway they don't know any of us. They just start preaching that they are some kind of women's league for the protection of marriages and they disrupt lovers meeting.

Awake/explanation
Normal dream
Lucid dream

I went to bed around 11:30 PM, and forgot to set my alarms. I woke up around 3 AM from a dream and didn't voice memo it, so I only remember a sliver:

I was in a store with a friend of mine (Brooks, who shows up in a lot of dreams apparently) and we were looking around, when I spotted a rack of video-games. Curious, I stopped to thumb through them (this also happens a lot in dreams, lol, I guess in real life too in thrift stores). There were games there of various generations but no prices really lept out at me as good enough to pull the trigger on.

That's pretty much it for that fragment, then I remember lying down to WILD. I forced myself to get up and use the restroom (I was about to fall back asleep straight out) and when I got back I laid down and closed my eyes. It went very quickly, and suddenly I was startled back into waking mind by the sensation that my whole body was vibrating and there was a loud, train like sound in my ears. I knew these were just sleep vibrations, and as they passed, I laid still and listened. I kept my eyes shut and felt my heart beating fast from the start that I was given.

At this point I don't remember what happened. I think that after the noises passed, I may have actually been asleep and didn't realize it. It's also possible the noises passed, left me startled in bed, and I quickly fell asleep normally. I probably should have sat up and reality checked after the noises passed, because it may have been a totally successful WILD if I had.

At any rate, when I woke up this morning it was from another fragment:

I was in my car driving up a high-way ramp when for some reason I pulled over onto the side of the ramp and waited for a gap in cars (something made me do this but I can't remember what). Eventually, a gap came and I pulled out into the road, then pulled into the left lane because there was nobody there behind me and I figured I'd have time to get up to speed. As I did this and turned forwards, I realized another car was coming down the ramp the wrong way, and I quickly yanked my car into the right lane again. There were two guys riding on one motorcycle in-front of me, and I put on the brakes to not run into them. They put on their brakes at the same time, and as I wasn't braking hard enough, I pulled my wheel to the right to go off the ramp again. However, they pulled to the right too, and my car gently pushed their motorcycle off the embankment down the hill, while they both jumped off.

I quickly jumped out of my car and, for some reason, immediately ran down the hill to catch the motorcycle. When I got there, I picked it up and realized it wasn't much of a motorcycle at all-- it was like a little tiny motorcycle for children. I picked it up and hauled it back up the hill and set it on the pavement. The guy who was driving was the older brother of two siblings, and he apologized to me first, saying that he had slammed on the brakes because he was afraid there was a car coming, and if he had just kept going it would have been fine. I told him it was okay, I also could have just gone around them I guess, but anyway no harm done. Then he tried to start his bike and it wouldn't work.

I told him, which I knew from earlier in the dream somehow, that there was a mechanic up the ramp and across the street on the other side, as I walked with him and his brother up the ramp. I pointed it out to him, and he went inside a nearby building for some reason (I think it was a fast food joint). I started walking across the street (for some reason abandoning my car), and that's the last thing I remember before waking up.

only dreams i had this week were very short.

one dream with Jesus in it, but i don't really remember it.

Another dream had something to do with picard. He had all these extra starfleet shirts or something and some teenager guy needed a new shirt.

Nothing about Jamie. I hope to remember something good from her this week.

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7/3/2020
Took melatonin and B-complex vitamins
Fell asleep at 1:30AM.
Woke up at 6:30AM, woke up, went pee, came back. Used SSILD
Woke up at 8AM,
Woke up at 9:30AM, with recall. Wrote down all the dreams I remembered

What to work on: Writing down tags upon waking from alarm and using SSILD
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Dream 1(,slow breach and clear, Shaun watching me play game): I was in a slow-mo breach and clear sort of game and after clearing a few rooms it was done and I was interacting with this small screen which itself was a game. Shaun was watching me play this one and I felt bad because I thought I had been playing it for hours and he was just watching.

Dream 2(matteo and I living in room, cant find underwear, teacher offering prize, principal robot): Matteo and I were living in a room together only a school trip or something. I needed to change but couldnt find where I put my underwear. Right before we decided to leave a girl(maybe erica) came down the stairwell in our place. We all went to a presentation and a teacher was trying to get our attentiont by offering a prize to the people who do. I wanted the prize. We all sat down and then he started talking and handed off the presentation to the principal. Shortly after the principle started, a robot that looked very much like her came in through the door on the side and started saying stuff. It appeared preplanned.

Dream 3(Risk in backyard): I was playing risk with the boys in my backyard and at one point the board was gone and only the pieces remained on the grass so we decided fuck it the game is over.

Dream 4(course w/ boxes and moving platforms, tons of hot tubs and closer wants to get us all in trouble): I was in this VR game where you go through like this dungeon and I had to kill some baddies and find the end. I found a crowbar and another item and was wielding those. There were things to crouch under or I had to lie under one at one point. I found the end. Then there was this course with a moving platform that went next to a lot of glowing boxes and I had to use my weapon to touch all the boxes and they would change color. I finished the course and then Phoebe wanted me to jump and hit the last ones so I tried that. Then when we were done on our course we visited Lorne's course where there was a ton of hot tubs lined up and he was putting the covers back on to close up. He put them on TERRIBLY so we started readjusting them and an employee of the palce came out saying he didnt like how we did it and he had already had to fix them once today. He wanted to get us all in trouble and so I told him it was only Lorne, we were just helping to fix it. He didnt believe us so I told him to look at the footage from the cameras and he said oh for sure he will.

Finally a WILD success to report! WILD 12 did the trick, and was followed by a DEILD of its own! Let's get into it:

Awake/explanation
Normal dream
Semi-lucid dream
Lucid dream

12:00 AM - 3:00 AM

I fell asleep so late last night I decided to abandon my first 2 hour alarm at 1:30 AM, because I knew if I slept only 1h30m, I wouldn't have had any dreams. When my alarm woke me at 3:00 AM however (approx. 3 hours of sleep), I remembered a dream!

I was trying to go into some kind of swimming pool/resort place, but I realized my phone was losing charge and I wouldn't be able to listen to any music/books, so I decided not to stay after all. I was in my car driving home, when I crossed through the parking lot of some place called Cafe... something. I can't remember the name, but as I was looking at it, I thought-- that sounds pretty nice. I could go for some coffee. And it also was the end of my work-day and I was driving home anyway, so I pull over into the parking lot.

There was a lady in a phonebooth nearby who was arguing so loudly I could hear her screaming, but I couldn't understand what she was saying specifically. I locked my door and started to walk away from my car, and as I got about halfway there, two people came out of the store, a guy and a girl, and I suddenly remembered I left my wallet sitting in the passenger seat of my car. So I went back, unlocked the door, pulled it out, and headed in-- while still listening to phonebooth woman yelling at someone over the phone.

I go into the store and notice it's much larger than I expected, with a full first floor, and also an escalator that goes up to a second floor. I'm a little overwhelmed because I really don't know much about coffee, though I like it alright, so I just start walking around in a counterclockwise circle looking at the walls. As I pass the escalator I see a group of 4-5 children with a woman watching over them, who seem to be getting something for themselves, like decaffeinated coffee, and they're all picking various flavors and creamers while she watches. I walk past them and notice I'm in a "kids' section" of coffee, and just sort of glance over things there and keep walking.

As I'm walking near the back aisles of the store, I hear a woman say, "everything alright?" and I just ignore her for some reason, thinking she's not talking to me I guess. She says again, "Can I help you with anything?" and I turn and look at her a little startled and say, "Oh, no, I'm just enjoying looking around," with a little laugh, and then say, "all this coffee is making me almost want to buy something." She laughs too and says, "Imagine how I feel working here." I notice she's an older lady, probably in her 50s, a little chubby and wrinkly and she seems nice. I tell her, "I just was on my way home and saw the store and decided to come have a look," and she says, "Oh, you're on your way home, did you stop downtown?" I tell her no, and she says, "There's an film festival happening there, you should have went and looked around!"

Someone had mentioned this to me earlier in the dream I remember, but I can't remember when, but as I was telling her, "yeah, someone mentioned that to me earlier," I woke up.

When I woke up, I decided to do my WILD, and as usual I fell asleep without transitioning.

3:00 AM - 4:30 AM

I woke up again before my next alarm which was set at 5 AM, and I think because my alarm has been set at 4:30 I didn't comprehend this, because I got up as usual, peed, and laid back down. Here I began thinking about King Yoshi's WILD Guide which I have mentioned before. In it, he mentions that a technique for stopping dry-spells is to pretend that you are an expert at what you're doing, and very confident you'll have the lucid dream.

Taking this a step further in my groggy state, I first start saying to myself, "Oh, yes, I know exactly what I'm doing," in my head, and, "I'll definitely succeed at this WILD, I do it all the time, it's very natural to me, like breathing." I'm kinda amused by this and suddenly while adjusting myself I'm just playing along with the idea and find myself talking to a fake audience, saying, "Ladies and gentlemen, you're about to see a lucid dream performed live on stage for your entertainment-- I'll be lying here and for the next two hours you'll be utterly entertained by the world of fantasy unfolding on the screen above your heads, whereon you can see everything I can see..."

I continue running with this mind-voice, promising them that it will be fantastic, as I comfy myself, then saying, "Now, I need absolute silence from the audience as I enter into one of the most difficult parts, wherein I must fall asleep comfortably," and I chuckle at this and get comfortable on my side and begin trying to count down in my head with each breath in and out.

4:30 AM - 5 AM

Suddenly, I'm awoken by my actual alarm going off, and I roll over and shut it off and lie back down, mentally saying to my fake audience, "That was a close call, ladies and gentlemen, what you saw was almost me failing for the entire night, but fear not! The alarm has caught me and now I will roll over and begin anew, and once more I need total silence please." I laid down on my right side now, and began counting down again, and quickly, I found myself lying in my bed in the morning with the sun shining through the window and the smell of breakfast from the other room.

I sat up, thinking, darnit, I messed up again! But then I reach up and plug my nose and find that I can breathe. I'm baffled by this, because I feel 100% awake and as if this is the realest, most regular awakening ever. Everything looks normal, sounds normal, feels normal. I plug my nose and try again and can still breathe. I'm so confused I think something is wrong with my nose, I can't understand how I can breathe.

But, I think, I have to be dreaming! There's nothing else that it could mean! So I basically leap out of bed and look at my hands, which look normal, and I start rubbing them together to increase the stability of the dream. I walk through the kitchen where my dad's making breakfast, and tell him I'm going outside. He seems puzzled by this but I open the door without waiting for his response and walk down the sidewalk and into the front yard. I'm still telling myself, "I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming!" because everything is so real I'm afraid I could lose it at any time.

As I'm walking into the front yard I remember my goal of "splitting a mountain with my aura" for the lucid dream tasks of July. So, wondering how to even do that, I begin screaming at the top of my lungs trying to somehow "charge up" like in DragonBall Z or something. Nothing really happens and I feel my voice becoming raspy, and have a faint moment of hoping I'm not actually awake and screaming in my front yard at the top of my lungs, lol.

But, to quell my fears, I immediately run an acre or two into the yard as fast as possible, and I'm able to run so quickly I know that it can't be real life. I stop again, and begin yelling again, trying to do... something, and my next idea is to stomp on the ground so hard it sends my aura out and splits the mountains. So I stomp on the ground, and nothing happens. Next, I bend down and punch the ground as hard as I can, then stand up and look around. Suddenly, I notice something falling and look up, only to see the moon has turned dull grey and is falling through the atmosphere breaking into pieces and falling to Earth, lol. So, I think, I can destroy the moon-- surely I can destroy a mountain. (Also I don't know why the moon was directly overhead during the day, don't ask questions.)

Again I punch the ground as hard as I can, then look up once more, and in the distance I see a mountain breaking into pieces and crumbling into dust, and I feel self-satisfied that I achieved my goal. When I woke up I feared I had failed, thinking the goal was to "split the mountain," but it turns out the goal was simply to "break a mountain," so I think I passed after all!

Content with this, I remember I had wanted to explore the mountain after it split. It kind of just crumpled into dust, but I figured it still might be worth seeing what was there. So I head over that way and find some small lumps of tiny mountain still standing next to a house. What's more, they seem to be lightly glowing, so I begin kicking at them and trying to see what's underneath. Eventually I take my hands and slash the air in their direction, as if cutting X's into them, and soon one begins to erupt, as if it were a tiny volcano. Without thinking I reach out with my hand and catch a piece of lava, and find out it is unbearably hot and drop it on the ground (not sure what I was expecting). I pull my hood up over my head (suddenly wearing a hoodie I guess) and pick up a piece of rock that has some lava sitting on it, and throw it at the nearby house, just to see if I can catch it on fire (I guess I'm kind of destructive, huh?).

It doesn't, so I head over to the house; I somehow teleport inside the house and don't know how. This confuses me and makes me worry I'm losing control, so I begin rubbing my hands together again to reassert control and stability in the dream, and then I decide to exit the house by holding onto a banister and kicking my way through a window. I do so and slide out onto the ground awkwardly, but get out nonetheless, lol.

I walk away from the houses and notice that I'm on a hill, overlooking a golf-course, and there's another hill above me-- and people are hitting golf-balls off the hill into the course as if it's a driving range. I head up on the hill and at this time, a friend of mine, Brooks, comes and begins talking but I don't listen well, and soon after a girl he used to date comes up and begins complaining that someone has broken the window out of her house. She questions him, and then me, and remembering that I don't have to stay here for this and have better things to do, I smile at her and then turn and jump off the hill and begin gliding down into the golf course with my arms out like wings.

However, I'm not satisfied to glide, and think about how I always have trouble truly flying. I remember how on the forums here at Dreamviews, someone said that the key to dream control was to simply know that it would work. As a symbolic gesture, I simply drop my arms by my side and begin saying to myself, "I don't need to worry, I'll simply lift into the air and float. This is my mind; I control everything here."

Surely enough, I begin rising into the air, fairly rapidly, up above the trees, until suddenly I see a cliff overhang I hadn't noticed before. I float along underneath it and land on a small platform and notice there is a nametag on it, and a ragtag house. The nametag says "William" something or other, and I turn around to see a little anthropomorphic mole (standing on his hind legs) looking up at me. When turning around, I accidentally bump him and he falls off the platform, like 10 stories, and hits the ground. I look down after him trying to ascertain that he's okay, and when I see him get up and brush himself off I decide he is.

I start walking into his little house (uninvited, lol) and soon encounter another little mole person who is pointing a shovel at me warily, and I tell him, "Sorry, sorry, I don't mean to intrude!" and he threatens me with the tiny shovel again, and I say, "Your friend is okay, he's coming, look!" and I point down at him coming up in a little elevator. The one pointing the shovel at me continues holding it out but looks down at him.

And suddenly, just like that, the lights go out. I have no idea what time it is, but I realize I've woken up, and I hold my eyes firmly shut and just lie there. I feel like I'm struggling to fall asleep again. Eventually, I open my eyes and I'm in my room, but now it's dark. Once more I think, "Darn, the DEILD attempt didn't work," and start to get up, thinking it's the middle of the night still. Then I stop, and plug my nose again as I'm getting out of bed. And I find I can breathe! Once again I'm baffled by how real the false awakening feels, and how quickly I dismissed it as being real life, and am glad I did another reality check before taking it for granted. I stand up and go over to my door in the dark, and think, "When I open this door, I'll be overlooking the rings of Saturn," which is the first thing that comes to mind. I open the door, and instead I'm looking at my hallway, and my dog is at my feet wagging her tail. I close the door in her face (lol), and think, "When I open this door, I'll be somewhere fantastic!" and I open the door again. Once again, I'm in the hallway and my dog is at my feet wagging her tail.

I say, "alright, fine," and walk through the door with my dog following me. It's now light as I exit the hallway, and my dad is in the kitchen making breakfast, and I say, "Good lord, how long have you been making breakfast?" and he says, "About an hour," (LOL) and I walk past him and go out the door into the yard again. This time I stop and bend down to pet my dog, and I notice her eyes are shut and her face is even more greyed than in real life, and I sympathetically say, "Oh no, you're getting all old girl!" and as I say it I realize I've made a mistake. She starts bending down and coughing up phlegm and stuff and I think, "Oh no, I set the expectation that my dog is old and sickly and now she's gonna die in front of me," so I start backing away from her and saying, "No, just kidding, you're young and spritely! You're even younger than real life! I've never seen you so energetic!" but I'm also backing away from her because I don't want to get distracted with this and want to go do more lucid dreaming stuff.

As I'm heading into the driveway, I look back and see my dog is indeed young and healthy again like when she was a puppy, and she comes bounding down after me into the driveway. I start jumping in the air repeatedly, thinking to fly again, and then I stop and think, "Oh yeah, there was that other dream task of milking something!"

No sooner did I think this than I suddenly found myself trapped in some strange, half-awake state, unable to move. It was like one of my eyes was seeing my bed in real life, and the other eye was seeing the dream, and the dream was suddenly "locked up." I was just stuck there floating in space, and I closed my real life eye (this was purely an illusion/dream, not reality I think) and still I was stuck in the dream, but now I was back in the mole house sitting on a sofa, unable to move. There was a man there talking to me about lucid dreaming in theory, and I told him, "Actually, I'm lucid dreaming right now, I just can't move!"

He went bug-eyed at this and then began scoffing at the idea, and I said, "No, no! I really am, I'm just stuck!" and while ignoring his scoffing I somehow accidentally found myself awake for real.

I did another reality check JUST TO BE SURE, and then laid down again in my bed and patted myself on the back. Finally, at least one decent LD after a week of work!

Edit: listening to my audio logs I also discovered I reported a dream fragment I had forgotten, but I don't know when it happened:

I had a dream I was playing Runescape (lol) and came across these two guys swarming around this emerald lying on the ground as if they were protecting it. I walked up to them and watched them for a bit and then just ran up and took it off the ground. They both ran after me telling me they were trying to protect it and I needed to drop it, and I just said, "No, that's okay," and logged out and changed to another world (lol). Once I got there I used a spell to go home and then walked away still holding the emerald, but I accidentally wandered into a dangerous area and got the crap kicked out of me and died, dropping all my stuff.

Panicking a little, I ran back there again and picked it all back up and tried to run back to the home town, but again got killed and dropped everything again, but a little closer back to home.

But I woke up shortly thereafter.

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

My cousin David showed me some pain diving yesterday. It's a competition were people are supposed to jump from high places into water and do flips and trix.

I'm by an inside pool but I'm only a spectator. I don't see anyone but I know David is jumping from a high height and I hear and know the water is splashing. My mom is there and she is sceptical as she says that this seems way to dangerous.

As a formless observer I see myself at the front door of the house where I'm currently staying. There's two other people with me. C stands beside the sofa and U. Ch in front of the kitchen table. The observer part in me locates an object approaching from outside towards the entrance. It is a square-looking thing that my dream self recognizes as my reality check (it is). It rolls its way up the steps and stops before the door. But my dream self denies it passage, explaining to my two guests, that because I don’t know what the object entails, unless we're to open the door and find out, then it would "defeat the purpose" of the reality check altogether, and so I couldn't invite it in.

* * *

Authorities are searching for a boy who has been missing. I'm inside a completely dark room covered in black drapes, accompanied by a creepy lady who holds the boy hostage. This lady, whose name is not known, looks like a very sophisticated clairvoyant dressed in black robes. The kid, who will never speak during the course of the dream, resembles a very young Anakin Skywalker. He is neither scared nor unfazed about his present situation. While we stand together, a bunch of computer screens turn on, revealing the face of FBI agents that know of the boy's whereabouts. The lady leaves the room and escapes.

I'm left with the boy and convince him to tag along. We follow a tunnel that leads to the outskirts of a large castle. We change into new attires to match with the times and setting of this place. The boy in particular now resembles a very young Link, except for his blonde hair. We walk around a lake lying to the side of one of the castle's towers. As we reach the other side of the lake we sneak past some guards standing watch by a gate and reach what appears a small town.

There's folk going by doing their business. The streets are crowded with merchants, women, and children. A string of houses lie on both sides of the street. The armors of the city watch shine under the light of the sun as they patrol around every now and then. If we walk close to any of the town's inhabitants a prompt appears above their heads like those in a video game.

We make our way to the roof of these houses to remain hidden from the authorities and think about our best course of action. The kid seems to take this little adventure rather well. From above, an underground passage leading to a cellar lies to our left. When we reach the bottom, we find a large room of beds with people sleeping. I turn on some lights to see what we can use.

Suddenly the agents (also dressed in armor) have discovered our location and reach the gate with a whole army to spare. I frantically search for weapons but can't find any. A lady approaches the inlet to the cellar. She interrogates the man who guards the entrance. He refuses to speak so she sticks a sword up his side and leaves him to die. She returns for her army but we take this opportunity to sneak out and run for our lives.

We run around the corners of the town, and climb atop people's homes, keeping out of grasp from the city watch. On rooftop we find a long round door that covers a tunnel. It is a long path that leads to the other side of town, away from danger. We enter and I find three sets of sandals and shoes, mostly light to wear and white in color. They look beautiful and I can't help but store them in my bag.

Outside we reach another gate surrounded by a dangerous current. The precipice is tall enough to prove deadly. I fall and in true "Dark Souls" fashion lose my "souls". Now I'm trapped on top of a very small hill while three crocodiles roam around in the water.

* * *

There's a door I keep opening and closing. I keep explaining to someone or more than one person about what happens when you open a door. I make sure they know that it takes at least three times for the person who crosses it while entering for it to mean something, and the same when someone exits the same amount of times. Was it perhaps, lucidity? Ah, the memory eludes me.

Again I won't describe my WILD process other than what has changed. As before I set three alarms, but as you'll see below only two of them were used.

I attempted both the "counting down (and up)" WILD anchor, as well as once trying the "FILD." All three were failures, though I obviously don't blame the anchors. I'm not sure what is going wrong, I just seem to be unable to keep my consciousness, there hits a point and suddenly I'm out like a light-switch.

That being said, I had a few strange experiences last night that I can't remember the timing of.

-----

Awake/explanation
Normal dream
Semi-lucid dream
Lucid dream

I went to be at 11:30 AM.

11:30 PM - 1:30 AM

I woke up and found I remembered no dreams (as yesterday, it seems 2 hours is not enough for me to get REM cycles going. I'll try 2h30m next time. I got up, peed, went back to bed and attempted a WILD. Almost no sooner than I laid down and closed my eyes, I realized it was 3:00 AM!

1:30 AM - 3 AM

I still don't know what happened here. Part of me thinks I may have succeeded in my WILD and had a false awakening, but I only remember turning off my 3 AM alarm once, so it seems like it had to be real. I should have reality checked, or maybe I did, I can't even remember. I just remember I laid my head down, closed my eyes, and without any dreams or even a feeling of passage of time, it was 3 AM and I was awake again!

I learned for one: I need to start doing reality checks the SECOND I wake up. I keep telling myself to do this and forgetting, sometimes remembering as I'm headed towards the bathroom or etc. I need to do them as soon as I wake up. I also think I will get in the habit of recording a voice memo just saying, "I woke up at 3 AM, and don't remember any dreams" so I can be sure in the morning if I had false awakenings. Anyway...

When I did this WILD, I can't remember if it was during the WILD or during a dream, but I have this weird memory of seeing a very white woman's face and upper body (I don't mean caucasian, I mean whited out, like a piece of paper, and featureless), against a light blue background. And just really trying to get my way inside what felt like a dream. It was as if I was looking through a telescope, and if I tried, I could get closer, but then I would slide back out again and the black circle around the image would close.

3 AM - 4:30 AM

I dreamed I was at my middle-school, but it was actually a college. Somehow, just like last night, I managed to lose my shoes at school, and ended up wearing a pair of white sneakers-- I was looking down at them walking through the hallways. I ended up walking outside onto the sidewalk where our busses used to line up (I've had many a dream about this particular sidewalk and missing the bus for some reason, then having to walk home-- perhaps a dream trigger).

As I walked outside I noticed there was a hubbub regarding a giant trailer carrying multiple huge missiles sitting in the parking lot. Almost before anyone could do anything about it, the school principal (who was actually my high-school principal) jumped in a nearby bus, hooked it to the trailer, and backed it out of the parking lot into the adjoining parking lot-- so quickly that he ran the truck up onto the curb (causing us all to go, "ohhhh!"). The trailer smacked against the front of the bus after the collision, and put a huge dent in the back of it. Nobody seemed to know why this thing was here, but the principal took it upon himself to get the dent out. He took a giant wet sponge on a stick and just started beating the crap out of the back of the dent, shouting, "no problem! It'll be out in no time!" and similar.

Now here was a time skip. I may have woken up temporarily, as evidenced by this next bit:

I was now at my home, which was an incredibly ratty rusty shack built up on a hill in the middle of what looked like a literal dump. There was a ravine running near our house which essentially served as our driveway. For some reason, I was lying in my ratty bed in my room that was missing two walls (simply looking out onto the night-sky and this dump), and next to me was this giant missile launcher from school. I had somehow ended up with this thing in my house, though it wasn't on a trailer anymore, it was simple a computer console attached to a couple missiles.

Now for some reason, I thought it seemed like an incredibly grand idea to set the timer on these missiles, which made a beeping noise, as my anchor in attempting to do a WILD... in my dream. So I set the beeping timer, and I realized I set it wrongly. I wanted it to go longer, because I obviously didn't want the missile to launch, I just wanted the timer to run so I could listen to it as an anchor. So I tried to clear the timer. And clear it I did, because the missile immediately launched into the air, changed direction and shot off. I quickly looked at the console to try and see where it was headed and noticed the coordinates were a few miles south-east from here. I got up from the bed and looked out over the demolished wall of my room and saw the missile land with tremendous impact, creating a giant mushroom cloud, and causing the entire city nearby to light up. All the nearby animals were barking and car alarms were going off in the middle of the night.

Panicking, I ran back to the missile console unsure of what to do. How did I even end up with this? I couldn't remember. Would I be put in jail for accidentally launching a missile? I'm an adult, not a child, so I'd certainly be tried as a competent adult who did it on purpose. Why else would I steal the missiles? Then I noticed the timer was ticking again. Once more I panicked and tried to turn it off, and once more I immediately launched the missile, which shot off and landed in the same place with a similar explosion. I imagined everything within a mile of it was dead already, so it didn't really matter, but now I worried that somehow they could trace the origin of the missile.

I ran into the other room and grabbed my keys, and snuck through the room where my dad was sleeping on the floor. I felt bad leaving him and like it was my duty to stay with him, but I knew I didn't have time to wake him up or explain. I figured he would be fine since it seemed easily provable I was the one who launched the missiles accidentally. I snuck through the room, and went outside-- but as I looked downhill to where my car was, I saw flashing red and blue lights. They were already rolling up and surrounding where I could exit, so I instantly turned to my left to try to run away, and saw a fence about 5 feet high.

I ran at it and dove over it (and under the barbed wire about a foot off the top), and as I hit the ground on the other side I woke up in my bed, relieved I didn't have to really run from the cops!

I woke up before my alarm set at 5:00! At this point I had quite a bit of dream to record, thought back through it, and instead of describing it all (which has taken upwards of 5 minutes some nights), tried to hit the key points in my voice memo and hoped I could reconstruct it in the morning. I also went ahead and disabled my 5 AM alarm. I tried another WILD, which I felt pretty much like I'd succeed at, but once again, nothing.

4:30 AM - 9 AM

I could only recall a dream fragment at this point. Before I went to bed last night I had been reading "King Henry VI - Part 1" in my Shakespeare's Complete Works book. Lately in my spare-time I've been watching "Taxi" (an 80's sitcom) on Hulu, as well. Both of those things are relevant, because:

At some point before I woke up, I had a dream I was watching "King Henry VI - Part 1" being acted on Youtube, and the recording was from the '80s. But much to my delight, I realized as I turned it on and watched it that it was King Henry VI as acted by several of the main actors from the sitcom, "Taxi." The scene opened in some kind of cellar and inside were Judd Hirsch, Jeff Conaway, Tony Danza, and Marilu Henner acting as the various Dukes and Earls during the scene where Tony and Judd were acting as the Duke of Somerset and Richard Plantagenet arguing and getting people on their sides by having them pluck and wear white/red roses.

Afterwards, they all headed upstairs to the courtroom scene where Richard (Judd in this case) tries to have his family status as Duke of York restored, and who else to play the young King Henry VI, than Danny DeVito! When the camera scrolled up to him he was picking his nose sitting on the throne and the audience gave a huge laugh. They came up and began appealing to him in Shakespearean words, with the correct lines, (you know, 'thee,' 'thou' etc). Danny DeVito simply looked down after a few lines and said, "What do you bums want? Speak regular!" which elicited another huge laugh.

Unfortunately I can't remember almost anything else from this dream, which is a shame because it actually made me laugh when I woke up too. If only this were a real thing I could watch, lol.

Afterwards I got up and went about my morning routine!