non-lucid

Morning of November 4, 2015. Wednesday.



I and my wife Zsuzsanna and our children are living at our present home on W Street. However, it is elevated at least to second-storey perspective in the first situation, with our wooden staircase over twice as high and oriented northward (directly from our front door) rather than offset and westward (perpendicular to our front door and at the front of our porch) as in reality. Running parallel and adjacent to our footpath, in fact the railroad tracks seemingly replacing a portion of the street, is some sort of small train station (with the train seemingly running west to east). I eventually see Barry Cowsill (September 14, 1954 – c. August 29, 2005) cheerfully approaching our house, seemingly having gotten off a train that was stopped near where the intersection is in reality. He has a beard and is wearing a hat. I have a sense of positive expectation about this encounter and get an autograph from him. I get a sense that the other Cowsills may soon arrive but not necessarily visit our home. I am not sure why he is on his own presently.

Somehow, there is soon a heavy wind blowing; some sort of “super hurricane”, so powerful as to carry large pieces of metal everywhere. I am outside and trying to dodge things like falling garage doors and large pieces of bulldozers and earthmovers as well as sections of warehouses in the region. Although it seems I may be in danger from large falling objects and windblown debris, I do not feel that threatened, though I do try to get out of the way in each case. There are a couple diggers and bulldozers on the streets near our house.

I avoid a large sheet of metal falling towards me by ducking under some sort of metal awning sticking out from a parked utility truck or van. It is a very loud metallic sound when it hits the concrete sidewalk (fictional in this case, as the area is grass in reality). A few times, I move out of the way of approaching flying debris. This almost seems like an “automatic” or natural “ability”.

Directly after this, I get into a car (which is parked facing south next to our house), into the back seat, where two unfamiliar older boys are sitting - seemingly related to some sort of emergency evacuation of the area - they do not seem like my sons. (This is atypical for me, as I often cannot fit inside cars in dreams if the situation involves getting into one, though in some cases, I am already in a car and there is usually no problem as such.) I am slightly concerned that the car may be crushed and so I get out after a short time, mentioning this to the boys and a couple unknown adults. Although this wind is incredibly powerful, it does not seem to be doing any direct damage to buildings (other than abandoned warehouses) and does not even seem to have much direct force against my movements and walking about.

Mostly, this dream was shaped by actual loud metallic noises outside our window at the time; curiously enough, a trailer they were eventually unloading small diggers from after I was awake (which I could not have consciously known, as very similar noises came from temporarily parked car carriers and other random vehicles at times in the past).

Apparently, without deliberately trying to sound harsh or judgmental, there are certain people, including certain types of “dream interpreters” who are too short-sighted to understand that some dreams are mostly only shaped (or at least altered during the dream state) by environmental noises (as here) - even though there is also the inexplicable element of somehow knowing during sleep that there was a large trailer with diggers parked outside our house (our windows and curtains were closed). The other association seemed fairly untimely and random. Barry Cowsill actually died during Hurricane Katrina in 2005 (not found until later, thus why the date of passing is not exact). (“On August 29, 2005, Hurricane Katrina hit the city of New Orleans. Cowsill, who chose not to evacuate, weathered the storm in an abandoned warehouse.”)

The first segment of my dream may be a play on “being off track” - implying that my dream is soon going to be “altered” (”disturbed”) by environmental noises, which it was. Arguments and fights amongst unknown groups of people outside our window (while we were sleeping) have also influenced, even triggered as a foundation, our dreams at times. I am sure most experienced and genuine dream journalists can easily relate to this (especially those who live in a suburban area as we do).

I was somehow at my old house and I was walking through the hall ways and the bedrooms looked different. There were small and full of stuff which I haven't seen before and it kinda had like a red or orange tint/filter to it when I went inside them. I went outside in my back garden but then it looked like the house I live in currently. I started to shadow box (because I do boxing and muay thai) behind the glass doors where the dinning table is but the inside looked like my old house where there was a living room at the back of the house. This dream's house was weird at the outiside it looks like the house I currently live but the inside it was my old house.

GOAL: To have more interesting and longer dreams

* Me and my girlfriend were shopping on what seemed to be a house that was floating at sea.
* The KKK and purple clothing.
*Flying above crop circles.
*A Cambodian girl joke around with me.
*Someone sleeps on a bed full of teddy bears. *Unknown lady takes a shower.

It was very dark out the whole dream, like midnight dark. I was working in a several story high office building, but it wasn't like a skyscraper or anything. Just a several story brick building, very boring on the outside, and it looked a lot like the building from The Office.

Anyway, the woman in the cubicle kind of behind and across from mine was maybe in her mid to late 50s, stocky but not fat, with frosted dark blondish hair. She wore a sort of suit jacket and shell with a skirt and some low heels. Her jacket was sort of a pinky color, her skirt was more of a taupe. I can't remember if she wore glasses, but I don't think so.

There was another woman there, a middle-aged black woman who was very no-nonsense, and I think maybe she was supposed to be one of the Human Resources people.

I vaguely recalled the older lady leaving, but I turned round to talk to her and she was gone... I asked where she went, and the other woman told me she was gone - as in, gone for good, she'd left the company. I was a little bit surprised by this, since I hadn't realized she was leaving, otherwise I'd have said goodbye.

So the other woman was leaving for the night, and I didn't want to be in the building all alone, so I decided to leave, too. I got out into the parking lot and she got into a very tiny white car that looked sort of like an older BMW but very, very small. I recall thinking that it was a very expensive car, and that someone else in the company had one, too. Anyway, she drove off. I didn't have a car. It was extremely dark outside, and sort of rainy.

I briefly woke up. When I started dreaming again, I wasn't lucid, and the office building had turned into a really swanky hotel. I went back inside. The lobby was really brightly lit, and I recall there being a lot of gold stuff... maybe the carpet was even a gold color... it was fancy in the "trying too hard to be fancy" sense, where it came off as not being as fancy as it was trying to be (but still pretty fancy). Not exactly gaudy, either, though.

Suddenly I was a kung fu master who had somehow ended up getting a job at this hotel... for whatever reason. I don't recall what it was. I just recall going into sort of a ballroom/meeting room and everybody was completing handwriting assignments. Not quite calligraphy. I recall a professor coming through and grading them by marking them with streaks of watercolor, and he gave me a really bad grade, which I was pissed off by because my handwriting was clearly very good! I'd just written in a different language than everybody else. So we argued about it - I don't recall the exact words, or even if there were words at all, I think there was more of the sense that I was protesting than me actually saying anything specifically and the assumption that an argument had happened - and then eventually he wiped off the bad mark he'd put on it.

After that, I went out into the lobby and Donald Trump was there with his daughters. He was arguing with the receptionist.

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So I ordered a FitBit yesterday. My boyfriend has one because I got him one for his birthday, and I'm interested in the heart rate tracker and sleep tracker. It's hard for me to tell how much sleep I get, and I know I wake up a lot.

Early, bright morning. I was in school, going out of the main building. A girl from my class asked me if I can bring her some medicine that doctors have for her. I agreed, and went towards a local clinic. It was a small, tight building. I entered it, and asked about the medicine. They told me that they have prepared some pills for me. I told that I also wanted to take pills for that girl, and received it shortly after. Then the doctor called me, and said that we'll make two injections for my right hand. The doctor was tall, bald man and was wearing his work suit. He took a syringe with a long, wide needle and gave me injection to right side of my right wrist. Then he took a strange syringe. It had a long chisel to chip the bone, and needle to make injections inside of it. I felt small, strange pain when he was doing it. Later that day, when I was in home, I looked at the medicine they gave me - strange blue pills. I also realised that I forgot to gave the medicine to that girl.

So in this dream I'm not really sure if it is Lucid or Non-Lucid so I'm not really sure, I had control but very little did 2 RCs but don't now if my brain was trying to trick me

DREAM:
I am in my kitchen standing next to the fridge looking at the cabinets. I said to myself, "So this is a lucid dream?". I tried to preform the first RC but my brain was not quite comprehending, I shoved my thumb into the palm of my hand but I couldn't control my head to look down at it, It didn't hurt it just felt like I was lightly laying on the palm. Then (I couldn't move my head or legs) tried another RC, I tried to slam my hand as hard as I could on the counter top, and I felt nothing though the counter was stopping my hand in it's tracks, I never felt the pain from Impact. :END DREAM

My question is: Was that a Somewhat Lucid Dream or a Non-Lucid Dream and my mind is attempting to trick me? I don't remember more to the dream, like what happened before I was in the kitchen or after. Comment your thoughts below, I need to know if this was Lucid or just a Hoax... Thanks! It really does worry me a lot. (If this helps, I was taking a 4 hour nap when this happened.)

Dream fragment - I remember there being something about a friend called Jamie, whom I was ignoring for reasons. I think we might have been outside near a car and I didn't really want to talk to him.

Terrible recall, I went to bed at about and hour later than usual and none of my DEILD alarms woke me up. I think it's kind of related to the physical exertion from yesterday, which usually leads to me having deeper sleeps during the following night. I also felt like my awareness in ADA was lacking yesterday, like I was tuning out of everything more often and couldn't maintain focus on my surroundings without some internal dialogue distracting me.

Dl1 - Driving around the neighborhood, indistinct local roads, all very grey. Collide with other car driver (old ds). Agree to give him some more and pull out wad of cash. But trick him, the money is not to fix his car but to pay for him to do some work for me.
He has to write a long essay for me.

Dl2 - In an office, im given a form that has been filled out. I must change the form as its all filled out incorrectly: wrong address, lots missing. I fill out some details then ring firm to check they have not acted on application yet. It's ok there is still time to change the details before they go live on their system. The application is fraudulent, all the needed information is taken from random spurious sources.

Dl3 - A country had been invaded by someone. I can see a kind of zoomed out view of the country with the natives highlighted black and the invading army highlighted in red.
It shows there are far more invaders that native peoples and where highest concentrations are.
I am standing on a hillside (zoomed out) overlooking the shores of the other country and far off towns, undersiege. I need to save the country. I abseil down cliffs to the beach below. There are some caves below the chalk cliffs.
A bearded man asks if I want to buy some vials of earth. The earth is in different colours and is good for your health. I buy some and taste it, it's disgusting.

He then sells me a selection of balloon like worms of different colours. I take one out and it crawls/slides onto my face. This one is whitish in colour, looks a bit like intestines. Every hair on my body stands up as it crawls over my lips and feeds on me. I try to move it away and it goes onto my neck. I scream inwardly Aaaaaaaaaa!!!!

Dl4 - I go across the sea and again see a zoomed out view of all the important towns and roads. I choose to land away from the main towns where the land slopes down. I travel through some weird stick forest, where the trees are like giant twigs. I manage to get through without being spotted.
Again, I see zoomed out view of towns on hillside. I set fire to a giant CD, shiny silver and roll it at town at bottom of the hill. It sets fire to the town and a chain reaction is set in motion as town after town is set ablaze.
The main towns do not realise until it is to late and the battle is won.
The leaders of the opposing army are brought to meet with the other sides leaders.
All seems victorious until a knight of the other sides army grabs a gigantic sword, claymore and proceeds to cut everyones heads off in one swing. Leading to a sudden reversal of fortunes.

The bit with the worms were too vivid and bit with the earth was the first time I recall tasting anything in a dream...I think.

I was in my new house with my roommates, which turned into a boat. The roommates were now gone and there were lots of people. We were in the middle of the ocean. I was standing on deck by my dad and happened to look up at the night sky. I saw what I thought was a shooting star, but it was going so slowly and went across the whole sky. Then I saw another. "Dad, look!" I said, "I keep seeing shooting stars, but they are moving so slowly!" We see another, only this one gets bigger, and bigger, and bigger.. until it crashes into our boat. More "stars" come crashing down as we run to take shelter. "It's the space station!" someone said. Apparently the space station had broken apart and crashed to earth! It was chaos on the boat. Many people were injured.

There were two twin girls, about 20 years old, with long blonde brassy hair. One of them had been hit. They were in a room on the top of the ship. The one that was hit in the chest had died, and was talking to the twin who was still alive.

Back on deck, we see life rafts filled with people. One of the ships near us had sunk. The ship in front of us just passed by and did not see the people on life rafts, and our ship was about to pass right by them too. "STOP THE BOAT!!" I shouted. I ran over and started pulling people from the life rafts into the boat. I first pulled over children, then the rest of the people, including a morbidly obese man wearing khakis and a blue striped shirt(only including these unimportant details because I'm trying to remember everything).

Dinner is served on the ship, as people are finally starting to calm down. The obese man has a plate filled with one large chicken breast, two rolls, and potatoes(again, useless detail). I finally decide to eat.

Then, I'm in the room with the twins again, as an observer. The living twin wants to die to be with the dead twin. The dead twin is trying to convince the living one to stay, but the living twin is adamant on dying. She didn't want to be alone. She started to say, "I'll be honest, it feels kind of peaceful..(talking about dying)" .. and then my alarm goes off.

(If anyone reads this, it's in french, i put this here because i wrote it quickly in my language and wanted a safe place to put it and remember it, if someone wants to read it, it should work with google translate, it's about me on a cruise, going accidentally in a ghost parallel dimension of the ship with evil ancient people stuck in it..)

j'ai pénétré dans une dimension parallèle du bateau, c'était une dimension fantome, de temps où un jeune homme violent a commis des meurtres (le bateau etait vieux). Beaucoup de filles avaient tombées dans cet univers comme moi au fil du temps (le temps s'arretait dans cette dimension) toutes (je crois) ont restées pris ainsi avec l'esprit vengeur et violent (il etait pris aussi, cetait le premier et cetait lui qui avait mis cette dimension en mourant surement), elles ont donc toutes eu le même effets: elles sont devenues presques folles et extremement violentes, (ce n'était même plus les mêmes). en me promenant dans le bateau (celui de l'époque du jeune homme) jai pu constater la violence des lieux, il y avait un petit garçon d'à peine 10 ans calciné dans un coin, on l'avait brulé vif. il y avait des étagères comme dans les supermarchés, je me suis souvent pogné avec le jeune homme et sa troupe, peut importe comment on lui parlait ou le traitait, il finissait toujours par avoir des excessivités de colère extrement violentes, c'était le plus fort dans cette dimension, il y avait une fille tres violente aussi et tres puissante, la plus puissante, cétait sans doute la premiere a avoir tombé dans la dimension parallèle (donc la plus vieille) elle ne permettait a personne de s'approcher de lui. comme je venais d'arriver et que j'avais encore l'esprit sain, j'était souvent la cible d'attaques violentes et de colère, je me suis battue d'inombrables fois, sans succès, car il ne pouvait y avoir de gagnants, ça ne menait nul part, ils étaient immortels. il m'ont souvent couru après tous ensemble en hurlant, même dans ma cabine (version dans l'ancien temps) le gars m'avait trouvé et avait essayer de me blesser. je me suis cachée a un moment entre les produits dans une étagère, ils sont passés, a ce moment, jai vu stillwell passé, et aller vers un coin dont je n'avait jamais vu, je lai suivie. sa a mené au fond, les murs et les machineries etaient peintes en blanc. peu après, le gars (le mauvais esprit) était déjà a mes trousses, comme c'etait une dimension parallele créé par sa violence et sa mort (donc a lui) il avait senti que je j'étais proche de m'enfuir et de m'en sortir, et il voulait a tout prix m'en empêcher, pour que je sois moi aussi prisonniere dans la tristesse et la violence de son passé. quand jetait rendu proche d'une certaine porte a la fin du couloir que stillwell m'avait mené, je lui demandé quesquil faisait là lui aussi, il a dit qu'a 2 ans il a était tombé dans la dimension et cétait fait tué par le gars, je lui ai demandé comment il a grandi et continuer la vie dans la réalité, il m'a répondu qu'il n'avait pas mangé (la logique est forte ici..) je voyais déjà le gars s'en venir a la course, il voulait absolument m'empêcher de partir, la porte etait ma derniere chance et si je manquait cette seule occasion, je n'en aurait plus jamais, j'allais être damné comme ces filles pour l'éternité dans cette dimension. il allait vite. jai ouvert la porte et c'était ma chambre, avec une autre porte au bout du mur (en fait, le seul moyen de sortir etait de trouver cette porte, vite car plus le temps passait, plus elle disparaissait, et lorsquon l'ouvrait, on se retrouvait dans sa chambre a soi, il fallait franchir la deuxieme porte, si on la franchissait et quon fermait la porte derrière nous, on était sauvé, personne ne pourrait rouvrir cette porte, la dimmension serait scellée a jamais, chaque personne n'avait droit qu'a une seule chance, les filles que j'avais vues étaient coincé dans cet enfer a jamais, on ne pouvait plus rien pour elles, de toute façon cette dimension etait tellement forgé dans la douleur, la tristesse, la violence, la folie, qu'elles n'étaient même plus elles-mêmes, la preuve, elles étaient violentes et elles tuaient comme l'esprit du gars...) jai donc couru vers la deuxième porte et je l'ai refermée a temps. J'étais sauvée...

I'm in a wooden barn, full of light with neat stack of hay close to the wall. The only occupant of the place is a gigantic elk, with a head as large as my torso and a antlers span of at least four meters. Its fur is chestnut brown, incredibly thick and soft. I'm here to put his tack and saddle on, and it's well behaved, giving me its head and taking the bite willingly. I secure the tack behind his antlers and tie a decorative piece made of leaves, whites flowers and silver belt to it next to its ear. I bent down to pick brush and notice that its cloven hoofs are biggers that my feets, even in the boots.

This is the first night in a while that I've recalled anything in some time. Hopefully it's the end of my dry spell

In a classroom
I'm walking into a classroom with a bunch of other people - mostly other adults. Now I'm sitting at a desk getting my stuff out and set up. As I'm pulling my laptop out of its bag, I see that it's not in its protective sleeve but is instead in the larger pocket. I'm confused (and slightly irritated) - I never do that! Now I've got the laptop on the desk and I'm trying to get everything plugged in, but I'm having trouble getting the cords to reach - somehow they've gotten tangled around each other. As I'm messing with the cords, I see some books standing upright propped up against the desk legs. Now the teacher has her projector set up and is asking some students behind me to do their presentation, but they're unable to. The students behind me are clumped together in small groups, and I suspect they're goofing off and not actually working. In any case, the teacher asks me to give mine. I'm not very happy about it - I hate presentations, and I gave mine last week - but I agree.

I'm still sitting at my desk, but now I'm listening to a talent show that's being performed on the other side of the classroom. The lights are dimmed to provide a nice ambiance - at least, as nice as you'll get in a classroom with uncomfortable chairs and small desks. A man and a woman are singing, and they're accompanied by a woman playing a piano and a man playing the largest string instrument I've ever seen. I think to myself that it's got to be twice as large as Seth's double bass. When I first look at him, I realize his instrument has strings running side-to-side as well as top-to-bottom, and that he's sliding his bow back and forth along one of the horizontal strings. There's a strange sound, almost electronic, and I assume it must be these strange strings and the strange way he's playing them, since there's certainly no electronic instruments being played. As I look more closely, I realize the horizontal strings are actually very tightly wound coils - that must explain the eerie sound. (After waking up, I realized I was hearing my music coming through my pillow speaker.)

Fragment: I'm walking through a wide hallway at work.

I couldn't remember much from last night but I could remember the last bit of the dream. I was in school and I walked in a computer room which I was not familiar with (long time since I was in school). There was a couple of people who I have never seen before and I then see my 2 old friends on the computer next to each other.

GOAL: To remember more in my dreams

November 02, 2015

Sleeping 2pm-10pm

We are inside some building. Collecting things to evacuate. Vince is there. I look at the clock and it's 9. Actually 3 minutes past. The end of the world is any second now. I pull up the window shades so we can watch how it will happen. It's ok. It won't be long now.

I don't remember much of last night's dreams. I keep waking up overheated, which I don't think is helping me.

I just remember that I was somewhere sort of like an old apartment I lived in in my old hometown, and my mother was extremely angry about something... something to do with a window... and I was really scared and woke up yelling.

Then I went back to sleep, and I don't remember anything else.