non-lucid

I couldn't remember the night before when I tried, so I neglected making a post.

Last night was pretty disjointed. I woke up partway through, trying to remind myself to remember my dream, but I'm not sure I really do. I do remember some stuff, though.

I woke up partway through and considered trying WILD but I was tired and making up for sleep debt over the week. And I just didn't feel like putting in the effort. I'll definitely do it tonight, though.

Anyway, I recall a fragment about... having Skittles, and eating them, and then I was digging through someone's laundry. I had dropped my Skittles in there.

I was doing this outside, kind of in front of a beach area, and it was kind of dark out but not nighttime. Sort of after sunset but before actual night sets in. And it was kind of cold and rainy out.

It was someone's brother's laundry. All of the clothing was a drab olive, or gray, or black, and there were skittles in them that weren't mine, and I was trying to be careful to eat only my Skittles and not the ones that were already in the dirty laundry, but I wasn't sure if I had accidentally eaten one of those, and it kind of grossed me out. I could sort of tell the difference because those skittles had gross spots on them, etc... anyway, I finally just spat out what I'd been chewing into a paper towel that I somehow magically found behind myself.

Then, some of my friends had moved into some low-rent apartments. They were very nice. There were persian rugs all over the floors, the floors were marble and natural wood, there was a nice fireplace, etc. I was amazed by how nice the apartments were. They were a 2-bedroom and even had a nice balcony. My mom complains that "people trash them" so not all of the apartments are this nice.

I wonder if it's possible for me and my boyfriend to rent one of these apartments, but we probably make too much money. I go outside for some reason that I don't remember, and walk a few blocks. I pass a little outdoor eating/socializing area with black cast iron tables and chairs, and think that it would be a nice place to hang out with neighbors. I'm trying to get back to mom's apartment, but realize that I don't remember which one it is or where it is, and it's very dark outside. The complex is mazelike, and I wander around for a long time looking for her building.

Then, I dream about a movie that all of my friends and I have been anticipating, but it's also actually a TV show, and it's about a bunch of underwater people/mermaids. And the special effects are TERRIBLE. The actors just have badly painted face makeup, and the whole thing feels half-assed and unconvincing, and we all feel ripped off. I recall a scene of one of the actors surfacing from beneath the waves and the makeup just looked so terrible, and I was very disappointed.

The next dream... now I am some sort of mermaid, and I live in a high rise, but I'm stuck there and don't have very much freedom, and the whole place is run by some millionaire.

I stand in front of a glass window and look out at the city. I am also floating, because I have no legs.

I sometimes steel a very small plane... but it's not a plane, it's more high tech, like a flying bike or something... and go fly around.

Flash back to another dream I had that this one dredged up:
I am in an apartment complex. It's a very run down complex. I'm going up and down the stairs, wandering around in this place. The carpet is very dirty, the walls are dingy, the whole thing is run down and it smells like food someone's cooking... that sort of general "I smell someone's food" smell where you can't figure out what they're cooking and whether or not it smells good or nasty. I remember the carpet being kind of... yellow brown...

So I go up these stairs, looking for some apartment, but I'm also not really looking for anything. The layout is a lot like an apartment I lived in when I was 13. It is not exactly dimly lit, but not well lit either. The stairs are claustrophobic and narrow and enclosed by walls. And for some reason, there are no doors for apartments. I get up to the top and there's a ledge against the wall running between the stairs, and nothing else.

Then, possibly in the same dream, I walk into an apartment building... it is dark inside... with the same sort of layout, but also falling apart.

And now this leads to recalling a fragment of yet another dream. I don't know if I've written about this one already, though.

I am in a sort of hospital place. Possibly a mental institution. The architecture is very prison-like, bars across the windows and everything is very washed out. I recall going down some stairs and gaining lucidity as I did so. I know this is a dream, but I'm not sure what to do about it. I go through a door at the bottom of the stairs.

Just remember fragments.

-Up north with parents and Niki, I suggested we go to coffee shop but then decided to make coffee at cabin. My mom gave me like 200$ and my grandpa was going to give me some money. Eventually I realized I was naked the entire time because I forgot to get dressed

-at a train station going somewhere but I had no idea how to use the train or get a ticket and it was a very sketchy environment

A mix of zombie and scientific experiment.

I was in a hotel? Condominium?

I was escaping.

I was with a guy I tried to court before. For some reason, I treated him to an ice cream (?) but then had to leave. It was inside a mall. I was looking for the way out, or to go to the other side of the mall without going out, but I didn't know how so I went outside.

I was escaping from something or someone. I was an experiment. For some reason, I returned. I got another friend/experiment who looks like a monster. The other one with me died but I only recall him from memory, not experience.

Parkour. I was in/near a hotel.

Can't remember mutch this night even. I was at school, something like a group project, but can't remeber who was with me or what it was about.

Finding a Wallet in the Trash
In my old room from childhood, but lots of the details are different. Grey day outside, a bit dark. It's really messy, something that caused a lot of anxiety in me as a teenager. I see a cardboard box with a little trash in it, it has a picture of a goth girl smoking in it. As I turn away, I suddenly want to take another look at the picture. The box now has a black trash bag in it.

I open it and it has a sleeping bag in it. It has drugs in it. A guy's friend had thrown it out to keep his friend sober. The sleeping bag also has a wallet in it and it is full of cash. I feel excited about it but I know I should return the wallet, cash and all.

Outside it is a sunny day in the center of a city, there is a used book store. Outside a car parks, the guy comes out with the friend who threw out his drugs and wallet and the friend's girlfriend. The guy is angry at his friend for throwing out the wallet, although I get the impression that the guy knows his friend's intentions were good. I know why he is so angry since I saw all the cash in the wallet. I struggle, should I give it back?

Back in my room, I see a teacher of mine. He is looking for his wallet. I give it back to him, cash and all, and he is really relived. I feel good that I did the right thing.

Motorcycle Ride
Outside a store near where I live, my teacher is giving people rides on his motorcycle through the grey day on the winding road, trees on either side. I feel myself lean as we make the bends, he stands on the stirrups of the bike to get balance, he isn't worried about crashing. Back outside the store there is a hotdog stand where people are going to get a greasy snack to eat.

First dream

Midnight, the moon was bright, giving some light to the city. It was really cold. I was driving a car in a Central District, following main road and then driving off to an alleys between skyscrapers. I parked the car, and went outside. Suddenly another car appeared and parked in the darkness. Then four persons came closer to me - they were my friends. All of them wearing black hoodies with dark trousers.

- What's the plan?
- We'll wait in the shadows. The vampire would arrive shortly.
- Sounds good.

We have hidden, and then another car parked in the darkness. Then a monstrosity - a tall humanoid with gray skin, sunken eyes and bat-like wings. We charged at the beast, but then it just swallowed one of my friends in his entirety. Next the vampire started to climb up a skyscraper, and tried to fly away. Suddenly I became a giant, and catched the vampire in my hand. I just thrown him down, and he hit the ground with force so strong, that vampires head just flied away from the corpse. Then my friend just scrambled out of the body. I became normal-sized again. We drove away to the docks, to throw the corpse into water. Next we were sitting near a fireplace and talked about getting a boat and crew.

Second dream

It was in another planet. It had breathable atmosphere and Earth-like gravity. I was in some sort of settlement. The main hall was really crowded. There was a teleport specialist post in the middle of the hall, a huge archway teleporter to the right, and a way outside to the left. I followed the hallway, and entered a locker room. I took a key, and opened a 182 locker. There was a bag with food rations, water and a hunting knife inside. I took it, and then went outside, as teleports were out of order for some reason.

The whole planet was a rocky wasteland. There were little to none vegetation, and no animals. The planet was swarming with some sort of creatures with distorted bodies, attacking anyone at sight. Many explorers were slain by them, but I kept fighting, going through Rocky Wasteland, Dark Valley and other regions, until I appeared at Red Mountain - a huge volcano. There was a raging ash storm, but I couldn't go back, I've gone too far to retreat now. There were other explorers here, but no one was cooperating. It was a race - the person who reaches abandoned cemetery first and retrieves family memorabilia for a rich man, gets the prize.

I was finally reaching the cemetery, but I stopped. Looking further, I saw that a wall of fire, and clouds of smoke and ash appeared. The rubble was flying all around. Finally something moved out of the clouds - it was devil himself, sending rays of destruction and death to anyone who might come. At first he was of more demonic appearance, but for some moments he looked like a corpse with glowing white, sunken eyes and gray hair.

This is where the teleporters at main settlement became active again. I found a teleporting stone in my bag, and used it. There was a siege, everyone had to evacuate. People were running to Earth through the archway teleporter. I decided to go deeper into the base, and look for some things I could've left. There were none, and I ran towards the main hall.

Last people were going through teleporter. Suddenly a portal appeared, and demons - bald people with gray skin, wearing bracers made of brown metal, and brown ragged trousers were going out of it. They had white, glowing and sunken eyes.

I had to choose - running to Earth, or going to cemetery, to fight devil. I've chosen the latter, and went to teleport specialist, so he could teleport me to cemetery. She said "Perhaps you're the one to fight devil. You may be our last hope." She made a mistake however, and I ended too far from it. I went back through teleport - demons won, the building was ruined, all portals inactive. The teleporting specialist was still alive, and her friend appeared.

I decided to go on foot again. Everyhting was gray and distorted. The sky was plain black, and there was only a green moon visible. I haven't went too far, getting weaker and weaker. In the end I just fallen on the ground. Suddenly everything get blurred, the time was moving backwards. I had to choose again, but this time I went to Earth. I appeared in an upper floor of old mansion. I went downstairs.

Hammock porn
I'm hanging in my hammock. My hammock is hanging diagonally in the room. This is supposed to be my room at my mom's house, but it feels more like I am in my brother's room, which is right next to mine. On the desk there is a tv, which I'm watching. It's playing the start of some porn. Still very innocent stuff. My little brother enters the room and I try to alt + tab to another window. The animation you're supposed to see when you hit alt + tab is there, but because I have no other screen open it's a failure. I do manage to pause the movie though. I think my little brother goes for a bit of a cheeky face like the "I see what you did there" meme. I try to convince him that this is in fact Game of Thrones. Sounds plausible with all the porn going on in there. He leaves again and closes the door behind him. In reality there's no door there. I get out of the hammock and grab the remote, so I can do something more effective next time.

Fragments
» I'm seeing three of my classmates without actually being there. It feels as if I'm spying on them remotely through something which allows me to see them from nearby. It's Kristen, Nick and Karl. They are all wearing a red blazer. Not bright red, but with a thin layer of black over it. I think they're in a mansion.

» I'm in a mall I believe. A girl I met in Indonesia is being looked for by the police. I believe they also ask me if I know her whereabouts, which I don't. I later run into her or send her a message, asking what the deal is.

Could've easily remembered more about the situation with the cops if I had written down more than 2 words.

Anna's friend
I'm in a shop that has at least two storeys. Because they have a inside 'balcony' type of thing going on, you can look from one storey to the next. I'm on the lower level. I believe a store employee asks me some questions as if to sell me something. I'm not really interested and he soon notices. I look up at the second storey. There are some interesting.. statues I believe. Quite a lot of them as well. I walk up the first couple of steps of the stairs.

I'm on the second storey, sitting on a couch with my Indonesian friend Anna, a bit of an older woman I think and perhaps someone is sitting next to the older woman as well. Anna is upset because one of her foreign friends isn't replying to her messages anymore. They used to be really close and they got close really fast. She first looks at the woman for help, but she isn't really in the helping mood you can tell. The woman passes it off onto me. Ok.. what am I supposed to do then? Anna wants to text the girl using my phone, to see if she will reply, because the girl doesn't have my number, so she won't know Anna is behind it.

Fragment
» I'm sitting down somewhere with my girlfriend during the day. Somewhere in the vicinity of a bakery. I leave her for a moment and go to the bakery. Though at this point I become a bodyless observer. I'm inside the bakery and witness an inspection of sorts which shows me how dirty the place is. It's up for sale I believe.

I only took the time to write down my girlfriend's name and nothing else.

Epic parkour
A few people are practising parkour. There's an apartment complex which is perhaps 3 storeys high. On the outside there are a lot of metal railings, sorta like when people have one of those minuscule balconies which are not much more than glorified windows. A group of guys, including a classmate called Len, is climbing them. They end up on the roof. In the middle of the apartment complex there's a 'hallway' to the other side. I walk through it to see how they get off the roof again. It doesn't seem nearly as high from this side. They are able to jump without even needing to roll afterwards, though there is also a ladder.

Back to the other side, they do it once more. This time there are a couple of people with cameras who are filming them. I want to do it as well! This seems awesome. I'm kinda concerned about my knee though, so I know I won't be fast. Someone from the cameracrew wants to stop me at first, but I go anyway.

Other side of the building again. It might look lame, but for my knee's sake I'm taking the ladder down.

To the front side again. There's a blue barrel I believe filled with water, which some guys use. I guess to wash their faces. It's perhaps a metre to the left of the front door of a middle aged woman. Something tells me she is Moroccan. She comes out for a talk. My classmates Kristen and Nick are here as well. At one point a bat flies by. Ok, slightly scared. Who knows what kind of diseases it may have.

Fragment
» I'm playing a racing game on my laptop. I remember mostly stretches of straight road and a look at the map that shows me the route I'm taking. It's extremely dark. I put my face close to the keyboard so I can see some keys. I remember seeing the F12 key. I press a key to make everything a bit brighter. Now my laptop itself exhumes a vivid dark red light.

Mansion & registration
I'm walking along a bicycle path near my mom's house during the day. There are a few people, one of them my classmate Luke. Next to the road we pass a mobile shop. It looks kind of like a hotdog van. My classmate Nicky is there. She joins us. There's some kind of big bulldozer like machine behind us. It's not really fast, but it makes sure we keep on walking, because else we're a goner. It's not scary though.

We end up at a fancy mansion. I guess we're here for dinner. A few of walk down the stairs. There's a dinner table (with white cloth?) and chairs in the middle of a room . There's nothing else in the room as far as I have seen, though I didn't look around. The table fits about 8 - 10 people. The idea of the colour red is very dominant, perhaps the carpet was red. I sit down at a chair but get up again to do something. (I think I went to the late registration). When I come back again Nicky is sitting on the chair next to mine and someone is sitting on my chair. Ah come on, I wanted to sit next to Nicky. At least I can get along with her.

The building I'm in right now doesn't feel any different from the mansion, though it looks different. Much more modest. Just simple grey. There's a computer area and there's a woman standing next to the door with a list. Only people who are on the list are allowed to enter. It's because it's a late registration event. You had to sign up for the late registration so that you can now sign up for classes you didn't register for. I'm allowed to enter.

To the left of the perhaps 10 or so computers there's a small lounge area with a couch. I'm chilling on it with Anna. We're sitting a bit tangled up. I have a clipboard in my hand. I'm trying to get something done but she keeps messing with me a bit. At one point I say something like "how about I fuck you right here". It's supposed to scare her off, but at the same time it sounds like a challenge, though I have no intention of actually doing anything. I'm also aware of the fact that she has a boyfriend. It feels like a few minutes later, when the moment of my comment has already passed that she teasingly leans in to kiss me. I put up the clipboard between our lips and say "girlfriend. girlfriend. I have a girlfriend". Ok time to register. I walk over to one of the computers. They're all unoccupied, but somehow I manage to take the one where a girl had already gotten up but wasn't completely finished yet. Her stuff is still here. She talks to me and is annoyed that I'm taking the computer. I tell her it'll just be 2 minutes. She's sitting on my left and takes some of her stuff which are still on the desk. To my right are 2 or 3 scissors and another item which also belong to her. She leans into me excessively to get her stuff. I'm quite annoyed by her.

I initially found myself in the room and suddenly it began to become extremely dark. I could tell from my window something out of the sky had to have made it become instantly dark. I for some reason was thrown in a state of panic requiring some sort of light. I attempted to to turn on all the lights in the room but none of them would work. This made me more paranoid and suddenly I thought lights are a dream sign. This spark of lucidity died quickly as I saw one the doors opened up to the living room. I began running on top the stairs seeing my brother and mom. They greeted me and I could see the sky from the window is now sunny. I wake up. Lucidity Time: 4 seconds

Notes:
- I've been really busy lately, so my focus during the day hasn't been on dreaming, so no lucids and my recall's down at the moment. Hopefully this weekend I can have some fun.

[Fragment 1]:
I'm playing GMod (but I'm physically inside the game). I'm in this big house with tons of rooms, and I have this NPC pack that includes one called "Morgan ____". I can't remember the last name now, but the name was burnt into my memory for a good while afterwards. I decided to spawn her. She walked around like a Witch from L4D, but then I provoked her somehow, and the silently but violently began pursuing me. She was very anime-esque, with pale white face, black holes for eyes, and blonde hair and a black & white striped dress (very Tim Burton-ish overall). I ran away, but no matter where I hid she would find me. I get tired of this and a little creeped out, so I go to the Client Options menu and delete everything I've spawned. She disappears. Then she comes back. I do this over and over, until I get really freaked out and think she's a computer virus or something (shoulda seen it; that's one of my dream signs). I open up the main menu and reach for the disconnect button, but she grabs me and tries to keep me from it. I finally press it and reload the map. SHE'S STILL THERE.

[Fragment 2]:
So I'm going up the stairs in my house and my dog's sitting on the landing. There's some other person's dog in the house, and it's looking at her. They're both wearing neon-ish accessories. Then, the other dog mounts my dog and I wrestle him off.

only fragments last night.
The face of a female monster, a cross between a gobelin and a rat, with a pointy muzzle and beady black eyes. zoom out, it has the body of a black hen with droppy, old woman brests. It's a Harpy.
Wings flapping, black as ink, two pair of them, coming from a gigantic statue of a woman hovering above a city.
Thor pulling loki into a room, asking him to do something. Loki let out a bitter laugh and ask him if he's gone crazy again.

Intensive DEILD attempt 1:
I set my alarm to go off at 2 for a WBTB and to empty my bladder so it wouldn't distract me when I woke up for DEILD later in the night. I then went back to bed quickly and tried doing some SSILD cycles, but I think I fell asleep on the first long cycle O_O. I seem to remember waking up too soon and tried getting back to sleep again (my alarm for DEILD was set to go at 3:30am and every 15 minutes after to a total of 8 times) so I turned off the first DEILD alarm to give myself more time to fall asleep. After that I managed to wake up several times to the sound of really loud rooster screeching 'COCK-A-DOODLE-DOO!' next to my pillow. It think I'll change this tone because it became seriously annoying . I did manage to lie still atleast 3 times upon waking up I think, but I didn't stay still. I always ended up moving. Also I had poor recall because of this and ended up sleeping in.

I can't recall the order of all these dreams (except the first and last one)

Dream 1 - FA?
I remember waking to the sound of my alarm at 2 and rolling around and getting up but it was crazy weird because I thought I was in a dream. The feeling I had as I woke up was like deja vu. I think I woke up as my body was about to enter REM which gave me this weird feeling (not really a dream but oh well).

Dream 2 - Script
I remember a vague dream about the dream occurring in a dream script. Imagine reading a book and then imagining what's happening as you read, that's pretty much what this dream was like. I had done a bunch of reading before going to bed, it was like a block of text was scrolling up and there were these supporting images forming in the background that played out the story.

Dream experience: 4 (unique)
Dream awareness: 0 (completely unaware)

Dream 3 - Compare and contrast
Me and another person are in a room, not very detailed and everything isn't that focused. We're talking about something and comparing them together, but none of it makes any sense really.

Dream experience: 2 (pretty uneventful)
Dream awareness: 1 (emotion)

Dream 4 - Drawing book
I seem to be at my parents house with my family somewhere around. There are 2 parts to this dream, 1 where I'm 'awake' and another where I'm doing the same thing but in a 'dream'. In the first part I think I'm in the lounge and I have a book out. It's pretty much related to schoolwork where I'm doodling out these boxes and filling them in with time lapses to illustrate a change over time in something. The first one was to do with whales. It was a box divided into 4 segments and each depicted a whale going from one stage to the next. I think there were 3 other boxes with diagrams depicting other concepts (I had a feeling they were geology related) though I only saw 2 others and without enough clarity to make out what they were. The next part of the dream I'm 'asleep' and I'm dreaming out the same scenario in the house, this time my daughter is there though and I'm showing her what I've done. I put the book down on the ground and open it up and I can show four pages at the same time (this should be impossible since a normal book can only show 2 pages (left and right leafs)). My parents come and tell me that it's time to go, we're going out somewhere tonight I think, probably dinner.

Dream experience: 5 (longer with 2 'parts' - kind of unique transition)
Dream awareness: 3 (I had some inkling of a feeling that I was present, as well as being able to focus on details)

Sat up for a 5am Wbtb this morning inspired by recent threads about Deild's with great advice - I sat up and quietly in bed and inwardly said my mantra and reminding myself from time to time I am going to teleport

" remember I am dreaming" over and over

I could still feel the sleepiness as I laid back down and knew I would be asleep soon but felt some awarenes too -" knowing "I laid down for a possible Wild/ Dild

Not sure how I got there so Dild ; skating along happy and fast " I know I am dreaming " skating is so much fun jumping up on benches with my skates grinding along like a young expert - exellent!

- after some fun skating about ~ doing huge jumps across big bodies of water and grinds along benches ....wahoo

I attempted a teleport - remembering my goal I closed my eyes to teleport and couldnt open them again... they felt all glued together... then as I squeezed them open and expected the beach scene I felt myself waking up Lucidity going astray .. It was a FA - it was such a memorable experience too though because I was being licked all over my face including my lips which I was trying to squeeze shut by a very happy to see me dog...which I immediately felt was my dog ... I felt pretty yucky with that episode but soon forgave him as one does ones own dog( lucidity was waining now as I don't have a dog in WL

Turns NL where the bed is then covered in about 6 or 7 little dogs jumping around for my attention- how sweet!!! Next my brothers and sisters came in to join us( never met them in waking life tho We all chatted then made food together🌺

Very Enjoyable

Seriously, Melatonin fucks with your dreams. It's been causing me to have such strange dreams that are constantly changing.

I took one the other day too and had a dream that instead of carving a pumpkin I was carving a cat.

I took one last night:

I was watching the news on TV and the guy had just reported some sad news about a suicide(s) and he was telling viewers to call 1-800-PURPOSE if they felt suicidal. When I woke up, I was surprised that it was actually a valid number, although when I looked it up I think it's actually an electronics company number or something.

I looked down at my hands and had more fingers than normal. I was outside my house I think, but it was jungle-like and covered in grass. I was more excited than usual so I was losing it. I focused on grass, then spun, which helped. I looked around for someone to bite(for the task of the month) but there was no one. I got too excited and woke in a FA and tried to write down my dream in a Sticky Note on my computer but it was all gibberish.

I've been having such short LDs lately, I really need to work on stabilization. But I have been having them every 2-4 nights, which is an improvement.

I was with Brittany and was watching an old home movie recording of her dresser when she was little. "You should save this! It shows the clothes you wore when you were younger." Then, we were IN the home movie, looking through her dresser. I found clothes in there that were actually mine, so I took them back. I realized the sun was setting soon and we were now in a tropical paradise so I wanted to go outside and watch it. So we went outside onto the beach. It was a beautiful sight, a colorful sunset, a red moon on the left of the skyline, and another white moon on the right. I had my feet in the water and noticed outlines of something in the sand under the water. "What are those?" I asked. "Turtles." My sister pulls one out and it's this frog-like turtle creature. She keeps pulling them out and she pulls out a small alligator, then a large alligator, which makes me step away. A trainer appears and prepares to do tricks with the alligator..

Dl1- I still seem to be at last night s festival but there is no cheese :/
I am in charge of one of the music stages in the large stage behind the manor house. It is a large grassed area with a raised wooden stage. Large amounts of people mill about. I am over on a bank at the end that dips down into ? There are ropes and wooded poles here. Mr B comes over to ask me what is happening with the stage and why no one is playing. I say there are no children who want to play. At the very end there is netting...
Dl2 - Arranging to meet up with others at a cinema (cinema seems like in a dream I had years ago). But meet up times are to vague. We are to meet between 7pm and 11pm as say we will probably miss each other.

*Lama Dorjee carries his students on his shoulders but he claims that tai situ does it better.

*I see the rock in the distance want to get a selfie with him to show off on social media. lol

*I group of thai women show me the correct way up the hill.

*I laugh extremely hard at this comedic singing bit a black women did.

*I attempt to choke an old friend on realising he stole money from me.

*Andre was sad on being bullied at work so I defend him with full force.