I've got my hands on a very small bomb with a button on it. When you hold the button in an alarm is set and the bomb will explode in 60 seconds. I hold in the button and disable it again by long pressing the button again. If you do a single short press on the button the bomb will explode instantaneously. I am afraid that I might do a single press by mistake. I am in the kitchen downstairs and is about to play poker in my brother's room. There is a control pass between the hallway and I have to hide the bomb in order to get through. Something happens and the guards get distracted. I pass unnoticed and is able to enter my brother's room. There are some poker men there and I join them. Notes: I don't know why I would bring a bomb to the poker game. My home in the dream didn't quite feel like home. I think it was because of the security. I'm in the woods with my cousin Oskar. There are many other people there who shoot arrows at each other. We hide behind a rock. It is almost like The Hunger Games and we need food. I am really protective over Oscar and tell him that he has to be careful. We need food so I tell Oskar that he needs to follow me so we can hunt someone down and take their supplies. New fragment. I'm facing a crowd of about 100 people that is hostile against me. Some people at the front have bows and are shooting at me. I ask them how many they are and why they are teaming up against me. I think it is odd why they are not killing each other in a game where you are supposed to be the last person standing. After I have asked the question there are only three persons left with bows and arrows. They tell me that they are only three people and I think to myself that it makes more sense now. They shoot arrows at me and I use my machete to deflect the arrows that is about to hit me. I wake up naturally but I still have the dream in my head. I'm not sure if I made the ending up by myself or if the dream really wanted me to see its ending. I run to the three people and one shout out loud that I still have a machete. I cut the first one and goes to the second one. I swing the machete against him and the tip of the machete is burrowed into his shoulder. I had a sleepover by my cousins and was with Oskar who is a small child.
9th October 2020 Scraps: Something about eggs and cooking or baking with them. Remember looking in the fridge and either taking or leaving four eggs. (this felt quite accurate to how the kitchen area actually looks and feels in waking life) There was a long dream but I left it too long and the recall faded. 10th October 2020 9:00 Fragment: Was in some mountains. That place I had built on creative had appeared, the mountain area. I remember being of unproportional scale and trying to cover it to prevent someone else from seeing it? Something about lewd stuff being in there? L and S and talking. Then in a mall, aunt I was also there. Something about a mini sand castle building kit? This is back in my old home area. Vague discussion with the three of them about people and how people had lost their jobs with the pandemic. I remark on how society has set itself up for failure. My point seems understood, but not accepted, by the others. Scraps: (still the previous fragment's dream) Roaming the town, looked like the capital. Some guy from a group or gang? In a jeep or SUV with them and my old friend JC from school. I go somewhere with them. I'm riding with them in the back but my position seems elevated. A casino. Discussing the level of peoples' intelligence. A powerful and rich woman owns this casino. I remember she wore a pearl coloured dress. She makes offerings out of kindness; food or currency? Not sure. 10:15 Fragment: Some fantasy realm. I am a female character near the end of the dream and fight a bone dragon. I trick it with a fake hostage and it hesitates, I think it was a child cooperating with me. Then I trap the dragon with a vine plant of some kind (the word heron came to mind as I wrote the notes) and I start cutting the dragon's sinew and bone methodically, using a long slicing sword. Before I am done, it starts to glitch or something and disappears. Then I climb up or use a platform elevator of some kind and there's another female character. She's my twin sister. She has a vivid red silk dress with gold trim, and I have a silk vivid green dress with a similar gold trim. The coloured areas have a subtle patterning but in the dream the dresses appear more western than I expect for their style. She had been the dragon all along and thanks me for releasing her. She tells me about how I'd set up traps in advance and other things and comments on these things. But I don't remember any of it and start to come to the conclusion I'd made myself forget for some reason. Before I could dwell on it, we jump down to the stone courtyard where the fight had occurred, and we're about to go somewhere together, but the dream ends soon after. This area had a tinting like a bathing of sunset and I remember godrays and distant castles and such-like fantasy style structures. Notes: - The castle areas in the last fragment remind me of Lothric from Dark Souls III, but with a more cheery look. - It's been a very long time since I thought about bone dragons, and it's probably the first time one has appeared in a dream. - The woman at the casino seemed to look like a pin-up model or just had a general style of 50s/60s to her. I think she was blonde, which matched her pearl dress. - There were a lot of dresses featured in these dreams, compared to normal (which tends to be 0). - It's not the first time I was a female character, but it's not too common either. It felt as though the character was just me though, and not that I was in a role of some kind.
Updated 10-10-2020 at 03:31 PM by 95293
8th October 2020 Fragment: In space, it looks like Freelancer, kind of. (Like most of my recent Freelancer themed dreams, the scale looked vast and more realistic) First I launched from a planet in a system completely filled by a nebula, like Omicron Beta, but not. The star looked dimmed through the clouds as it would in the actual game. I had a complex reputation standing with the factions so when some ships from a hostile faction appeared out of a trade lane, some friendlies immediately started turning red. Soon the whole system was after me and I tried to evade them in the usual ways. There was Rheinland navy in this system. I got to a wormhole? Then I'm in a different system. A Sigma type system. There was a large yellow star and some distant planets beyond it, as well as small nebulae and asteroid fields. The background itself was a light blue-grey nebula, but I don't remember the shape of it. I can't recall what my ship was like but I was using turret mode at some point to look around while cruising. I used a trade lane eventually but interrupted travel through it, halfway, and then veered off toward a darker area of the system behind an asteroid field. There were TIE fighters? I scanned the ships and saw the weapons were class 3, but somehow had a hull damage stat of around 3.4k. Their lasers were blue and the lasers themselves were classed as pulse-laser guns. I remember going toward a capital ship of some kind and landing on it. I got in a control room and remember taking some black gloves, they felt slightly heavy? Thoughts about Darth Vader and his armour. Then some crew landed on the capital ship and got to me and started attacking. An officer of some kind told me I only had a few seconds to live? Fragment: Reality mixed in with BL. A portal to my place was used or being opened. It was Ar, who had the form of that gecko pokemon, whatever its name is, with a mostly black and red colour scheme. Remember talking to him and telling him about the rooms in this in-game place. But I think I was wanting to move my base or something. At some other point some random furries appeared? Notes: - The unlikely weapon stats for a class 3 weapon could have been a good dream sign/dream indicator but I feel this came about from recently thinking about some of the bigger mods for the game, like TNG.
5th October 2020 Fragment: Dream about Warcraft 3 and some special game mode where you would get cash injections every so often, instead of being able to mine gold. You also started out with a single worker. I think I was playing this with my siblings, but it was mixed in with reality and the locations were based on my old town? I was playing as Undead and got some groups of ghouls going after having made some basic buildings (a ziggurat or two and a necropolis?). I went out from the base, leading the ghouls, mix of myself and a hero unit. At some point while away from the base, another player showed up at the base and destroyed mostly everything. I remember trying to get the acolyte worker away. 7th October 2020 Scraps/bulletpoints: - Bit in a dark hallway. Expected Diablo to be at the end. Instead there was an ettin. There were other creatures on the way there. Died at the end. - Reincarnated? Somewhere else after that. - BL items with modified look. - Going around with a group of other people who were also reincarnates, I am surprised about having memories of my past life (direct memory of the previous dream sections). In the dream, I think of posting about this on DV. - At the end of the dream, something about a group masturbation event with the rest of the reincarnates? We were surrounding a naked black man who was in his room. He was posing for us.
I drank some water and woke up first 01.24 and later on 03.50. By 03.40 I tried to WILD. I rested in the corpse position and managed to lose my body completely and after about an hour I enter a ninja dream I have a third person view and there is a forest. Two ninjas run alongside each other. I lost it after some seconds and I felt my body again. I give up after 80 minutes 05.13 because of a bad itch on my nose and that I need some sleep too. It didn't feel like I was conscious in over one hour. I think maybe I lost consciousness and regained it later. I didn't have any HI or HH which is good but also worrying because all people seem to have it when they WILD. I'm by the big road on way to Lidle from our house. Signe and my other friends from class are also there. I'm also half lucid and decide that I want to eat something sweet because it's one of my dream goals. There is a buss waiting for us and we enter it. The driver is Sandra, our SO teacher. I ask her to drive to the candy shop and she says I am lucky to have a buss that drives me in the city. I think to myself that it would have been faster to walk or fly there. When we are by the candy shop (It's no specific candy shop and it has taken the place where Subway usually is) I tell Sandra to join us. She says she can't but I command her that she is going to eat candy with us. All of my friends' faces and Sandra's face become like they are brain dead and she says okey to my commandment. We enter the shop and we are going to eat it all. I've lost all lucidity by this point. There are many windows where people can look in. We want to eat all the candy without anyone noticing us for some reason. They all begin to eat and I jump up on a shelf and look out a window. I see someone that looks like Dumbledore and say it to the other people in the store. They are no longer brain dead and say something about Dumbledore. I am Harry Potter suddenly and some other wizard I have never seen before is reading my mind and demands that I tell him who Severus Lipus (?) is while he points his wand against my head. I point my wand back at him and there is also a third wizard next to us that is pointing her wand against my enemy. Notes: The brain dead part of the dream says a lot. When I try to force things upon my DC's they may not come naturally. I never ate anything in the dream. I saw a trailer where Daniel Radcliffe had a role yesterday. I'm in a plane with some classmates and we are going on a trip to some noble family. I'm in the back row and Angelina is also there. She starts to cough and cough. I feel uncomfortable and she excuses herself and says that she usually cough when she reads. One of the the waitresses comes to Angelina and tells her to stop it. She stops and I ask if they can turn on the ventilation in order to give us new fresh air. There are many small fans in the wall that starts to push fresh air on us. New fragment. We are now outside the plane and my family is already there. I leave my group and join my family instead. Notes: I saw a picture of my mom flying a gyrocopter yesterday. We also talked about going on a class trip. I'm in Sturkö and know it's a dream. I start to run outside to the waters and my vision is getting darker and darker. I touch my face in order to stabilize it but it doesn't work. I slowly transition to my bed. I'm still walking but feel my back against my bed. When my real body's sensation takes over there is a weird transition where the gravity goes from pressing my feet down on the ground to instead pushing my back to the bed. It is confusing and I have to orient for a while before I am confident in my body. Notes: It may have been a FA because they often wake me up in a smooth way like this.
Updated 11-02-2020 at 08:57 AM by 97565
Spoiler for NSFW Sex: In the dream I was a blonde girl wearing blue panties and a tank top. I was like moving into an apartment while fingering myself and streaming it on twitch or onlyfans or something with a smartphone. I get like semi lucid and think "hmm this is weird I have a vagiana and I'm like actually getting "correct" sensations from it." Though in dreams I've had extra sets of arms multiple times in the past so I guess not that weird. I stop moving the boxes and stop streaming on my phone and just start playing with myself. I then decide I want to try it with an actual penis. As if on cue this guy walks in. He's like the owner of the apartment but like late teens brown hair very 'generic' looking but kind of wide shoulders, short, and a little on the chubby side. He immediately freaks out upon seeing me half naked on the couch and is all modest about it, but I can see his boner and I tell him to cut loose. He starts taking a condom from his walled but I tell him that won't be necessary. So he undoes his belt and takes off his clothes (and he had spongebob breifs) and gets on top of me. He obviously had no clue what he was doing but it was still better than my fingers. It wasn't that good he had a really small dick and a mini beer belly that I was staring at the whole time. For some reason the folds on his stomach kind of looked like a face and that was really distracting. The dude gets through about two thrusts before he finishes, goes soft and basically passed out. I wake up after that but didn't have a wet dream. -+- In dream I was at work and I had a small tattoo on my left arm. In dark blue ink I had a dreamcatcher on my bicep and it was wrapped in plastic wrap. I couldn't remember why I had gotten it or how I had made it through (IRL I'm terrified of needles) but nevertheless I was showing it off. -+- Manei and I met in what seemed like a restaurant kitchen. She is telling me about a date she went on that went badly, that she saw some guy and he didn't like her. I don't remember her exact dialogue but she complained that the guy kept telling her she was too tall and looked too skinny from the side. "First of all, that sounds really shallow. Second of all, this is a lucid dream, can't you look however you want?" "Well of course I could. How one wants to express their truest self in a [plane of existence where such things are malleable, (this part was in dreamspeak and didn't translate, as is everything else in this convo in brackets)] is a form of self expression that nobody should deny or try to change, ever. If someone doesn't love you for who you really are then that's their problem not yours. I mean having an opinion is one thing but you shouldn't be a dick about it. But he didn't think that and thats why I didn't agree to a second date." We left the kitchen and were at a fancy beachside resort at twilight. It had a tall hotel tower with a lot of balconies and large pool. There was a long sidewalk with dwarf palm trees on both sides leading out onto the beach. There were two suns, one smaller than the other and the big ringed Saturn planet so this must have been that dream planet. She asked me how my 'date' went and for some reason implied the earlier dream. "Well it wasn't much of a date, not much emotional bonding." I said openly sharing the memories of the prior dream. "The guy finished in about 5 seconds, and he was wearing spongebob underwear." She abruptly changes the subject. We sit down together in a large net hammock. "I was born in [Either Hawaii or Southern California on some other timeline, so don't bother looking for me in records]. I got sick when I was about 12, and died when I was about 18 or 20. I never got to go out and meet people and fall in love. Even when I was at the end, when I so weak could barely move, the doctors would bring me out in a wheelchair or a bed to watch the sunrise in the beach and would tell me that I was smiling. When I passed the higher ups gave me a lot of choices since I had a short life and didn't get a chance to do what I wanted. I chose to do this, to live on as a fragment of someone else. Its one of the few ways I could keep my individuality and most of my memories." "You know I can't truly believe that. It's hard to believe you're anything but a fragment of my own consciousness trying to justify its reason for existence." "Science and physics as you know them does not explain everything, you know that. Its intentional, the higher ups intentionally constructed your plane of existence that way. They wanted it to be so convoluted and difficult to comprehend that humans wouldn't bother to try but yet you try anyways. Right now I think humans of your earth are close to some big breakthrough but the Higher ups aren't ready for you to make it yet, thats why they put that virus in there, to distract you." "Here's the part I never understood. Why would god or the higher ups or whatever hide his true presence?" "They told me but I can't comprehend or understand either. [Think like what Marcus said. The difference between a monkey and a human. Their cells and bodies are 99% the same but that 1% is the difference between a monkey that can break a nut with a rock and a human that can build a spaceship that flies to the moon. The Higher ups are like just a few more percent, because to them we are monkeys looking up at the moon and not even understand it as a place you can go. Try as a might you cannot explain to a monkey how a rocket or particle accelerator works or the complex political and scientific reasons you want to build them. The monkey will just ask why you didn't spend that time getting food or having sex. Your motivations are so complex compared to them that they might as well be nonsense. Sometimes its seems like they are hurting you causing disasters and pain and killing humans. When someone who is Cristian says "the lord works in mysterious ways" they are not just trying to make an excuse why bad things happen when their god should be watching over and protecting them. Well... sometimes they are, but what they really mean to say is this. You can not believe anything else I ever tell you but please believe this. Those higher beings are out there, you can call them aliens or gods or visitors from other universes; they don't really care what we call them but they exist.] "Okay." I respond. I can tell the dream is destabilizing and I put my arm around her shoulder, feeling how solid it is. "Daymn, gurl. Your shoulder feels like steel." I say, completely shifting the tone of the conversation. She laughs and despite my attempts to stabilize the dream fades out.
I was sleeping in Sturkö tonight and it was pretty cold so I woke up several times. I once again got the experience where I regain my conscious before I have woken up. I think this is the moment people mean when they talk about DEILD and how people are briefly awake before they fully wake up. I tried to WILD but gave up because the blankets I was using made me itch all the time. I'm in a desert and there is a pair of two small rabbit feet under the sand. They are about two millimeters in diameter. I pull the feet out of the sand and there is a rabbit. It bounces on my hand up and down and I am afraid that I might drop it. I turn left and walk in the desert until I reach the TV room upstairs. There are some people talking about D&D and how the rabbit is one of their characters. They talk about dexterity throws and how you always win them even if you roll a really low number. They talk about a bard too. Notes: I joined my friend in one of his D&D meetings with his friends and I was a bard. My friend was a small frog and I think the rabbit symbolised his character. My brother is playing some kind of game that looks like Ratchet and Clank. Later my family is going to watch some Batman movie. They ask my brother if he wants to play instead. Notes: There is a new Batman movie that is going to be released that my family wants to watch. I'm in a dark basement and I have some people on my team that are equipped with bullet proof vests and rifles. We proceed and shoot criminals as we go forward. The criminals shoot at us too. There is a long corridor with different kinds of protection for the criminals on each side of the corridor. We spend some time shooting at each other there. My team is being shot down and I am the only one remaining. It is pitch-dark but the criminals are outlined with a white color as they walk against me because I have special vision. They don't see me and I hide to the left of a door. They walk past me and I try to be as small as possible. They look over me and suddenly their faces are full with fear and they run out of the basement. When they leave I look where they looked and find that there is some kind of text engraved in the wall. I realize that there are some kinds of monsters in here. I quickly run to the exit hatch but the criminals are about to close it. I take my gun that is now some kind of high tech shotgun. I shoot with it against the hatch and scream as if I was one of the monsters. The criminals quickly run away in fear and I am able to escape the building. There is a car running up alongside me. I enter the car and the man driving next to me knows about the failed operation. I tell him about the text but doesn't quite remember what it said. I tell him that it was something about blood. He quickly realizes what monster I am talking about and says in a cool way that it is the blood hunters. I don't ask about the monsters and he doesn't tell me about them. There is a yellow car in front of us and I see something in their baggage. While both of the cars are driving I open my door, go to the front of our car, and rip of the back glass of the other car and the glass is like plastic (I don't remember how I was able to do it). I look inside and see some mattresses. I pull them out and grab something and takes it with me into the other car that I was in before. We drive and reach some kind of camp. The man driving is now my dad. The yellow car I stole something from earlier is now back. They are friendly to me even though I stole from them. I walk around the camp and a woman says that I am too young to sleep in the comfortable tent, I have to learn how to handle the cold. Me and dad enters a big tent that can hold about 15 people sleeping. I look down on the sticks and ropes that hold the tent up and notice that they are divided in groups of three. I think about the tent construction for some time and go to a chair. There are many other kids there now. One of the children is identical to Diego's half sibling. She talks to her sister about my name and how it is spelled with a c and not a k. I don't mind it but think that she is cute. She comes to me with a picture and asks me if I am the same person. It is a picture of my sister when she was about 10 years old. There is something wrong with the eyes on the photo which creates a feeling of sickness and craziness in a bad way. I tell her that it is my sister but she doesn't seem to understand my swedish. There is a teacher and she talks about how we should have read To Kill a Mockingbird. Some people in the class say they read some chapters three times in order to fully understand them. I have only read it once and is therefore nervous that I might fail. People with cakes come in and drop them of next to my seat. I cut a chocolate cake next to me but decide that I shouldn't eat it because it isn't mine. There comes a woman who says to a disabled man next to me that he shouldn't have cut the cake. I feel bad because the disabled person is unable to say that it wasn't him. I tell the woman that it was I who cut the cake and that I am truly sorry. She appreciates my honest answer and gives me a smile. There comes a disabled girl to the front who is about to confess something. She starts of that she can't resist blonde people and I have to think a second if I have blonde hair and is relieved when I remember that I have brown hair. She also confesses that she is a sex addict and that it is hard. Notes: That was a long dream. I never saw the monster but it feels as if they were like the monsters from until dawn. I saw a yellow car yesterday. I thought about mattresses before I went to bed. It was a cold night in Sturkö so I dreamt about sleeping in the cold. I baked some chocolate balls yesterday to my cousins birthday, I got some cake when I dropped the chocolate balls off.
Updated 10-07-2020 at 09:06 AM by 97565
late bedtime, ~midnight or later. Fall asleep slowly, L reading on phone, takes a while to fall asleep no early recall first couple of wakings 2nd/3rd waking set stronger intention for dreaming/lucidity took longer to get back to sleep after this a lot of wakings, shoulder bothering up out of bed ~08:00 later, lots of scenes/fragments earlier: + in apartment, some old g/f (wife?) has returned, at first I'm happy, but the she starts nit-picking me endlessly and I'm crestfallen, and think being alone may have been better + romantically together with an older, unattractive woman, she mentions "we need to talk" (about our relationship), and I think about responding "well, one option is not talking" but I don't say anything because that will probably not be received well. Sitting close (holding her in my arms, we're sitting on a couch/bench, her back is to me), she makes a pun/joke, I get it, I laugh, and say was a good one, she laughs to and is proud of her clever pun later: + (f) I need to satisfy some quest or set of requirements, I think I have time, but others say no I have to finish all the tasks today + (f) at some point I'm wearing shorts, and I wonder about how approprite this is? + parking scooter [DS!] on a curving curb, I'm looking closely at the curb painting, there's a red zone there, a crosswalk just ahead, and I'm trying to remember the parking rules. There's a car in a spot ahead that looks like it's not marked, and there is enough room for the scooter to park so I want to move ahead to that spot. Where I'm looking at parking right now is just in front of a crosswalk, and is too close to be legal, I know. Walking on (back along the sidewalk the other way from how I approached on the scooter) is a building (and an outdoor mailbox where I pick up the mail?), it is dark/twilight outside, and I see lights inside the building in a basement complex. I "recognize" the building and the apartment within (think it's where students live, or where I lived?). I'm in a room, and suddenly I see Rb. Mlls (company R) leaning in from an open window to the outside, and I jump with shock at seeing him because he wasn't there before. He comes in an gives me tasks to do? With some fat young woman whom I don't like? + maneuvering in traffic at an intersection, I join a flow with some cars to my left, I realize I'm cutting off one of the cars but keep merging left, we're turning left, then I enter some storefront. Inside is a gaming parlor and the view switches to a video game screen . I'm using a joystick as the game control. The joystick has a yaw input (twisting the stick instead of just rotating it) and I'm experimenting with this as well. The game is played on a circular "board" with different icons/images and the point is to make a full circle of your chosen icon, while others are trying to do the same. No matter how fast I manipulate the controls and replace my icons, the other players keep placing theirs, and I can't make any progress.
non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening astral projection I am a detective with a colleague working on a case somewhere in the Arctic Circle, on a small community. It's freezing hell and locals found a body near the coast. We try to collect some evidence, but the body is completely frozen and we can't do shit and nobody seems available to pick it up to the morgue. Then someone warns us of a polar bear coming towards us and we have to run. The bear goes to the corpse with the intention of eating it, we try to scare him away but then a pack of wolves comes from another direction and we just have to give up. Next day we find bits and pieces of the corpse, like an arm and a foot. Later on I am somewhere in Africa visiting some friends, but on arriving at their place, I encounter dozens of lions and lionesses either roaming around or lying down in groups here and there. I jump inside a car that is parked just outside their house and call out to someone. But their door is open and I fear the worst. I drive around and find more people I know and bring them in safely into the car. We are packed like sardines and some lions get more aggressive, so we get out of there.
Updated 10-12-2020 at 08:30 PM by 34880
warm milk with honey, 500mg GABA, 1g tryptophan Bed time about midnight final waking ~07:30 no insomnia throughout the night (didn't look at clock) one waking pitch black, one with more outside light earlier: + party in arcade basement beer glasses dirty searching for clean one hey let's have a tournament I'm thinking Donkey Kong or asteroids there's billiards as well, lots of tables what an awesome arcade room, the guys there are drinking beer, I want some beer too, I look for a glass, there are swoopy beer shaped glasses (narrower at base and curving up to wider at the top), and there are tall wine glasses, they're all dirty to some extent. mid: + in grocery store, examining shelves, cookies up high, many packages opened and some cookies eaten, the higher shelves (for stocking purposes) have the cookies but the lower ones don't. So they're not really out of cookies I'm really examining the aisle closely Girl there, I'm recommending to her the strawberry yogurt, she's a bit hostile. I return to her later and ask her if she bought the strawberry yogurt, she's friendlier. I see containers of opened/eaten yogurt. As we leave the store and she's going to her car (a very tall, i.e., monster truck with several young people seated in the cab), I reach back with my right arm and we "shake hands" by brushing our fingertips together and I call to her friends "("Kim"?) has yogurt for you!" + uni football team, I'm on team, I'm QB?, even though I'm old (current age), my dad was on the football team, too. I'm pumping my fist into the air, so proud of my history on the team. The young people think what is up with that weird old guy, I think they must respect me because I was on the team! I'm walking on some raised path and look down on to a cafeteria scene near a beverage machine. + I go into a room reserved for the team, there are ushers standing guard (?), and thre are tables of snacks, I'm looking for something to eat but pretty much everything has been consumed. There are huge piles of wooden chopstick sets all over. I find something to eat but there's not much left, and a woman (and her daughter?) are also approaching that place and (we're going to have to compete for the snacks?) + I'm entering the football stadium, looking for my seat, it's dark, since I've been on the team, I think I get to sit with the team? There are a bunch of really big black guys sitting there, I'm looking at them trying to figure out if I can sit here. I do sit and I realize these are TERRIBLE seats -- you can't even see the field, which is way around some distant corner. You can barely even hear the action or the crowd. + walking in to (uni) sports facility through tall thick doors, leading someone through corridor, giving directions, [aware of my path] late: + walking with DB (uni g/f) around B, on Oxf st. along Uni border we pass the gym building on our left, I'm planning to set up a racquetball session in the gym for her and her friends and I say I'll join them. Then we're farther from campus on the downtown side, she wants to go to the buildings there, but I don't, I look up the hill and see the clock tower, realize how far we are from it, and say "I don't want to spend the time to go there," (I was thinking of a particular building with a lecture hall, "Wh?"), "I'll take you there later.". She's walking ahead of me, I call to her, "D, " and gesture with my hand for her to return to me. I lead us back towards the gym, we're walking up a hill, there is traffic / cars and we're weaving our way through them, and I ask her, "So, what's your schedule?" (pronounced in the English way, "SHED-YULE"), and she answers that she and (some guy? says name?) are travelling and bumming stays at friends houses. I want to ask her about this guy, if he's a serious boyfriend. I want to take her hand, but I don't want to spoil our friendship, and she may no longer feel that way about me. We reach the back door of the gym and she head up the stairs (very colorful, lots of bright primary colors), and I ask her "How's the nuclear ionics going?" She responds s.l. "oh! You've been following me!" and I know this to be true, I googled her and found out her research topics included the physical of nuclear particles.
Notes: I tried one of my longest WILDs 22.30-23.25. I got some very light dreams about people standing in front of me and some eyes. I think they were HH and not light dreams actually. I'm walking in a snowy forest. My backpack is heavy and is hurting my shoulders. I'm walking and walking and I don't know to where I am walking. We reach a cliff and it's no longer winter. Dad wants us (me, dad and my brother) to jump of the 10 meter high cliff into the water. Me and my brother doesn't want to. Dad grabs my brother and starts to carry him while he runs unto the edge of the cliff. Dad makes a really long jump but doesn't make it to the edge of the cliff. For some reason he throws my brother over the edge before he lands on the ground. Dad lands on the cliff while my brother falls down the cliff. I scream at dad telling him that he is an idiot. He doesn't care much and says that he can fix it. My brother is really angry and can swim here (He can't swim IRL). Dad jumps in the water to save my brother but ends up pushing him down almost two meters when he lands on him while swimming to him. I am so angry at dad because it feels as if he wants to hurt my brother. Dad is calling grandpa and talks with speaker on. We listen to the conversation while being mad at dad. Notes: My brother is having a tough time and is screaming a lot now. Dad is always going to him and trying to talk to him even tough my brother doesn't want to. I'm watching a screen. There is a man that is talking english about how to be a better guitarist. He takes his guitar and says that you have to practice to play only using pull offs and hammer ons. He counts down on swedish and starts playing some really good music only using pull offs and hammer ons with his left hand. Notes: I got some inspiration from this dream IRL. I'm playing Among Us but everyone has a heart over them. You are able to give other people hearts during the game to those you don't think are impostors. I think to myself how I would want to win as an impostor and get a heart from everyone. Notes: I played some Among Us with my cousins yesterday. I woke up 04.00 and wrote down the dreams above this. I wake up in a hospital and I am shocked. I have panic in my voice and asks where I am and why I am here. A doctor and mom come to me and say that it's alright. Mom says that they are here to operate my warts away (They use the swedish word for warts but they are talking about my birth marks). I don't have a shirt on me and the doctor shows me where I have different birthmarks I have never seen before (I took a look under my shirt now IRL just to be sure I didn't have the birthmarks the doctor showed to me and I didn't have them). He takes a laser and do some weird patterns on my stomach that is supposed to help the operation. New part. We are in Sturkö and I have got a big belt over my stomach, about 15 cm width. It has shining lights on the inside that are placed over my birthmarks that are supposed to take them away. White lights on the front and red on the back. I turn it on and the lights really hurt in a way I have never felt before. It is like a burning chemical feeling about it. I walk around and it turns out that the belt actually isn't secured that good on my stomach. It falls down and the lights don't hit my birthmarks anymore. I walk around for a long time. New part. I'm at home and some of my cousins are also there. Jonathan is nagging about how he wants to play a game to his mother. The belt is still there and is hurting. During some periods I go to a sofa and can't move because it hurts so much. The pain goes in waves. New part. I'm walking in city with mom and the belt is still on. I look on my stomach and see how some kind of fluid is coming from the birthmarks. I touch the fluid with my finger and inspect it. I see how the birthmarks are starting to disappear. I think about mom's cousin L who has operated some of her birthmarks. I ask mom if it is not wrong to operate birthmarks. If no one would operate away birthmarks no one would look down on people with birthmarks and no one would have to suffer like I have done. Mom's answer has to do with that the world can't change and that we have to adapt. She is not happy with the world but says that I have to suffer because the world is bad. Notes: I talked with mom about L and her operations for some years ago and havn't thought about them for a long time. Dad uses some kind of laser to cure his patients sometimes. I usually don't feel pain in my dreams. The white lights on the front and red lights on the back has to do with car lights. I study for the driving license theory test now. I'm on discord and I see a gif with a girl that is transformed to a man. There is some kind of vacuum cleaner that sucks her breasts out from her. My view comes inside the gif and I see the woman that is now a man but still has a woman's face. She raises up from a operation table with some hospital men around her. She walks out. I become the operated person and wonder what I should do this beautiful morning now when I have changed gender. I am outside my school walking up the street to Centrum. I am aimlessly walking the streets and just enjoy that I am free. Notes: When I was a kid I wanted to be a girl and sometimes walked in a princess outfit. My name in Among Us is Miss Pink and the persons I play with often refer to me as she. Notes: That was an eventful night. The dream about my birthmarks was really long and most of the time I was just idling and feeling pain.
Not much from this week. a short dream about hating work again. honestly i wish my deams had more variety. I had a bunch of short Jamie dreams most in HH. first was I was visiting voyager and the holographic doctor was telling me there is nothing he can do for Jamie's BPD. Great. second is just being in a car with jamie and I was surprised she was there. Third she is leaving a room with my co worker Victoria. They were both laughing about something. Talking about me maybe? And no not the victoria from last week where i had a dream she was my girlfriend. Jamie went after the wrong victoria haha.
I couldn't focus on my school reading so I went for an afternoon nap between 14.50-16.40 and remembered this dream. I'm in the upper room with dad. I have my red hoodie on with the hood over my head so I can't look foreward. I sit on a bench where the music sounds actually stand. Dad is angry with me and says that I can't keep on practicing the guitar without the musical scales. He says that I should remove my hood and look him in the eyes. He is speaking as if I had done something really bad. I remove my hood and look at him. He says that he had a good time practicing base with me but that I need to fix my practice scheme. Notes: I began practicing with a metronome again some days ago. I actually only care about the pentatonic scale and don't find motivation when I try to learn the musical modes. I know them in theory and think that's enough (Now when I dreamt about it I tested out the mixolydian scale on a backing track and found it a little bit amusing).
I am assigned a project in a class in high school or college. For the project I am assigned to make a TV show in one weekend though it doesn't have to be high quality. Everything has all the hallmarks of very ammeter filmmaking. I pick out a few classmates. One is this korean girl, another looks like Jak and another is this elderly woman with one eye sticking out who looks like an old witch or shaman. (She actually looked like a character from a recent chapter of my book.) We get to talking and decide we decide to make a cop show, and I'm going to be a filmer/cameraman and everyone else will play characters. Episode 1: We get some policeman costumes, buy a box of doughnuts and ask actual police officers to film outside the station. Idr what happened here but Jak and another boy who had joined the project were sitting outside eating doughnuts and talking about a recent crime. The scene ended on a dick joke. Episode 2: The Korean girl is filming a scene where she is a private investigator hacking a companies' computers for signs of corruption. This was her scene idea and its super tropey (black hoodie, dark room, eating cheetos, like five monitors and her saying "I'm in" after typing on a keyboard super fast for like thirty seconds.). We spent a lot of time getting things set up the way she wanted it. Episode 3: Some kind of murder mystery and me (who was normally the director/filmer) got to guest star as the filmer. We filmed on my phone which we taped to the ceiling and applied a filter to make it look like security camera and Jak wearing a robber mask shot me with a nerf gun. Then cut to the old witch woman wearing a sherlock holmes outfit looking at me pretending to know forensics and me laying on the floor in a puddle of ketchup. (IIRC she just looked old but was actually a teenager) Episode 4: We went from a cop show to a cooking show. I was in the classroom where the dream started but it was now a kitchen, washing a big silver bowl and talking about what food I was going to make. ... Someone found one of my old sketchbooks. They proceeded to publish all of the worst/most awkward or embarrassing things out of it online and make a detailed wiki more or less with the intention of slander. (Though they were supposedly some kind of semi legitimate media outlet they were clearly doing it just for story.) They constructed a detailed report about my characters and stories obviously cherrypicking specific scenes and lines of dialogue out of context in an effort to make me appear racist and bigoted. I remember seeing a drawing I made of myself as a cowboy shooting someone (that I actually made IRL, in like the 5th grade) and him saying that because of that drawing I was a school shooter. Then another drawing of dream characters where the article went on to say I was bad at drawing faces and had psychological problems because I associated with dream character. (This drawing was not one I made irl) I then ended up running into the head writer in a wal-mart parking lot at night and asked him why he did it. I told him if he didn't write an article telling the truth and admitting that he just did it for story, and post it on his website with a video of him and his writers apologizing that I would try and sue. He just laughed at me so I went to wal-mart and bought a sledgehammer and took it to his yellow Bentley. When he came back with his friends started crying saying it was a gift from his father who died. Obviously I didn't care cause the guy was an asshole. ... I was in the basement of my old house playing video games with a friend (IDR which friend if it was an IRL one or an OTD one). He was playing halo and got attacked by a xenomoprh came out and jump scared him then killed him in game. Then it broke through the glass of the TV and came out in real life, and started eating him. I wasn't particularly scared in spite of it being a gory scene but I still ran upstairs and tried to get outside. I ran past my father who was confused and seeing him caused me to become lucid. I was still running and a quick glance over my shoulder showed me the xeno coming out the door and it had killed my father. Now lucid, I saw a useless construction in the middle of the yard. It was like a big ramp and set of walls made out of random scrap plywood and 2x4s and stuff. I affirmed that when I got around it there would be something to help me fight back. When I did I found it was an open suit of power armor and a railgun rifle. (It looked just like one I currently have in my WIP drawing folder) I got inside and all the panels closed sealing me in. I could still see normally but I had a HUD now with a radar and health bar like you do in Halo. Movement felt slightly sluggish but very strong. The Xenomorph caught up with me and tried to kill me by vomiting dark green acid on me. The HUD gave me a warning saying not to exit due to chemical hazard but said that the armor was made of nonreactive metal and acid resistant and the threat level was "low". The xenomorph tried to stab me with a scythe appendage but it just deflected off the armor; though it pushed me back some. I punched it back, which seemed to crack parts of its exoskeleton and hurt it pretty badly, causing it to bleed more acid. I then managed to grab hold of its tounge thingy (the little inside mouth thingy xenomorphs have) and pull it out. As the monster recoiled I picked up the railgun rifle and pulled the trigger. Nobody told me that thing was fully automatic with a machinegun-like rate of fire. One short burst and shots rang out on streaks of plasma with very noticeable recoil that I could feel right through the armor. The volley turned the alien to a puddle of green goo and black chunks and well as flattening the neighbor's house and four or fire cars completely.
Big dreaming night, and pretty good sleep. No extended insomnia. Got very tipsy, two large-ish glasses of wine. Ate fresh apple cake, two ice creams, bowl of chips. Had a happy attitude all evening. Watched videos before bed. Read a little bit before bed. bedtime ~23:30 Taking a more relaxed attitude is everything. earlier: + floating in ocean, attacked by giant whale shark fish like thing, roll around to avoid its mouth getting eaten, it swims off eventually + guard at the doorway, I present my key to prove my right to be here, enter apt. see son S1? guard follows, the apartment has colorful but peeling walls, I'm a bit ashamed of the apartment later: + attending some big conference, (outside, preparing to go in) + playing wilderness golf? + car broken into and emptied. (after a meeting?) I go out to my car parked on the street. It's in the middle of an intersection? The blue ford fiesta? I see that it has been broken into, and completely stripped. It looks like there is nothing left inside. I am panicked and upset, I walk around the car looking for anything, but it's completely stripped. Even my registration is gone, totally empty. Even the jack has been stolen. Looking more, I see there is a door pocket/panel opened on the left side passenger door with some stuff left inside it, I wonder why they didn't take it. There's a police patrol car right next to me, and I'm blocking them and they're trying to get by, I stop them and tell them my car's been broken into. + scooter turned donkey ride! [very vivid, feelings of acceleration and gravity!] The best/most vivid dream of the night is probably the scooter-donkey ride. I was very closely inspecting [inspecting objects, thinking about them and how they work, especially with a close up view, is a sure DREAM SIGN for me. Very often this is door knob/gate locking mechanisms, and sink faucets] "my" scooter. I very clearly saw the gas in the trasparent gas tank sloshing around, interestingly, it seemed to be getting *fuller* rather than leaking out. I looked around back and found that it was leaking, and so I manipulated some things to close the container to stop the leak. I move around to the back of the scooter and inspect the various components that are hanging by their wires attached to the main corpus of the scooter. I line up one on the right hand side and attach it, using guide arrows, and do the same for another component, but on the left side of the scooter. Now a circular grey-scale display lights up with a control and gague system for the scooter and I start touching things to configure it. (There is some woman nearby who comments on something? Forgot...). My attention moves to the handlebars, and the left handlebar front brake control, which seems non-functional. It seems not attached to anything and just flapping there, I try manipulating it buy I get the sense it's not attached to anything. I look down to the front wheel as I'm doing this. I wonder about the maximum speed of this scooter, and the figure 35 MPH pops into my head. I imagine riding it and pushing on the handles to turn (like on a motorcycle, push left to go left, push right to go right). I mount the scooter, which now inexplicably has transformed into a small donkey! There is still a central circular display/handle and I now hold on to this and we take off. It is outside in daylight on a hilly country road setting with no trees. I "turn" the donkey to a side road that heads upwards, fairly rough gravelly/rocky terrain, and wonder if this thing has the strength to go long with me on it, and how well it will go uphill. The response is that it energetically sprints up the hill, very quickly, and *accelerates*! I feel the gravity and the acceleration as I strengthen my grip to hold on! We lurch forwards up the hill, turning towards the right. Now it seems that we are in some multi-townhouse division with a paved roadway/driveway, still hilly, still heading uphill. There are two men working in the road ahead, and I'm somewhat concerned about encountering them. As I pass them they do not seem threatening but are amused at my passage. Then something about turning downhill and giving a little girl a flower, but that is less clear. + walking through office with g/f L, we're in the printer room, there are large printer/copier devices there, they have colorful declas on the side, we kiss briefly in printer room, look at oddly colored and logoed printer/copiers, walk to cube, lots of people in close space close cubes, drinks cooler on ice on desk full of bottles of cold beverages, many of them motel-sized small drink bottles, many of them alcoholic, the manager there warns that some of those are very potent, I enter my cube, there's a team of young IT guys dismantaling routers there, wires are everywhere, they're asking me questions
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