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Dream - Lucid

I was going to get married to my high school boyfriend, Brett. His mom was talking to me about it; she was really excited. I kept thinking that I would rather be with Dallas, but for some reason, I agreed to marry Brett.

We were then in the building we were getting married in. It was a tower. The room we were in was very large and had tall ceilings. There was a very large, almost floor-to-ceiling window to the right. There were very few people there, only immediate family. We were up at the front, about to get married. All the sudden, we heard thunder. We went to look out the window. It was nighttime, and you could see many other towers outside the window, as if we were in a city. There was then a very large bolt of lightning. The thunder coincided with it, however, it struck a tower that was in front of us, and the thunder just...stopped. It was like it hitting the building muted it. I think it had something to do with the sound barrier. The tower that was hit started to crumble. It then started to collapse. It was hitting a tower directly beside it as well, which was making it fall too. One of the towers then started to lean towards our window! I thought for sure we were done for; this was the end. My mom started to yell
"We're gonna die! We're gonna die!"
The top of the tower then came crashing through the large window we were observing from. I noticed my brother was in the path of it, and I tackled him out of the way. The tower crashed down inside the building, crushing Brett and his family, but my mom, brother, a random guy, and I were all safe.

I then replayed this scene over again for some reason. I already knew what was going to happen the second time around. Nothing changed except for the fact that I already knew what was going to happen.

This dream was very intense and vivid. The feeling of being scared, about to die and accepting it is really powerful. As soon as I woke up, I had the urge to wake my husband up and tell him about it, but I let him sleep.

~

I was in this area that was just a lot of rooms. It's like the rooms were many room-sized stalls lined up. They didn't have a ceiling. In my room, I was getting provocative pictures taken of me by a young, blonde female photographer. I believe it was nighttime. We took a break from it, and I left my room and saw that next door, Ceejay, this girl I used to work with at Kohl's, was also getting provocative pictures taken of her. She was naked and sitting on the floor. There was a huge glob of yellow-tinted (I assumed it was used) lube sitting on a pillow next to her. She was talking to me, and I kept looking at the gross lube.

Then, this tall, sturdily built blonde woman who was supposed to be my mom, looked into my room and saw the photographer and all the equipment. She was a very conservative woman, so I knew she'd be pissed. After a few minutes, I ran into her, and she told me that she told the photographer to go home. She said other things, but I can't remember. She was stern about it. I'm sure at some point she told me not to do that, blah blah blah whatever.

So anyway, she left, and I saw my photographer walking by. I wanted to stop her and tell her to stay. I don't think I did. I then was thinking about how I didn't normally like to get my picture taken, but if it was a provocative photo, I enjoyed it.

~

Dallas and I had just gotten back from being out all day. It was my day off. I was playing some game though I don't remember much about it. I was then thinking about how I had picked up a shift at work that night. Why had I agreed to do that? I then couldn't remember what time I had agreed to. Was it 5? 6? 7? I then saw it written down on a piece of paper. I still couldn't tell if it was 5, 6, or 7. I looked at the clock and it was past 5, but I was then pretty sure it was 6. Boo that.

I then was in this hospital room with Dallas. It was a very large hospital room with many beds lined up. The lights were half off and no one was in the room but us. I walked down to the 4th bed down and started telling Dallas about how I was in that bed one night when I was having very bad stomach pains. The doctors checked me out and I was fine, so they sent me home. I "remembered" a guy being in the bed to my right.

I then was at the bakery with Dallas. I wasn't on the clock; I was honestly hoping that they would forget that I agreed to come in that night. The manager, Shannon, was there by herself. We got to talking. She was being very nice to me. I then made a comment about her being there all the time. She then said something about me being there all the time.
"The kids would like it if you were here all the time," she said.
It made me really happy to hear her say that. I must be good at talking to the kids who come up wanting free cookies.

1st. I was at a complex with a bunch of friends. We all stayed here because we were all diagnosed with cancer, the results would come back like the pathway results came back from school, each had the type of cancer with the recommended treatment, I remember Courtney Frame and Sophie Baker being there. This kind lead to another dream although I can’t remember the exact details, on thing I do remember though is stealing from shops..

2nd. This dream involved someone out in the parking lot being chased by a police car and although the people in there had never talked to me, they were somehow connected to me in the dream and I feel like they also had something to do with the first dream. I was in the parking lot and the man drove up to me, he reminded me of Sarah Faucett’s dad but driving a different car that was smaller, shitty and a weird colour like the colour of my eyes in that grass profile pic. There were children in the back and as I said I somehow felt that I had met this man before in the dream somewhere, so I hopped in, there were no creepy vibes about getting in the car (although there should have been) just a sense of urgency.
He began to talk about our escape saying that I would drive the car when he got out. I stated that I had never driven a car before, he replied by saying that it didn’t matter and that we had a big head start on them (Police) anyway. We drove past a town and the man was extremely surprised because he said he had not seen people so close to where we had been. At this town was a gigantic hall, so we got out.
The hall was a community hall because there were posters outside stating that if you needed any help to just go to the community hall and there were a couple of people in there, one was a girl with black hair. The man went somewhere after this and I was outside the hall by myself. There were a couple of people here and they looked very sick. I remember trying to get their attention and that the windows were like they were next to a hot shower so they were steaming. People had written messages in them although I wiped them off to get my point across (Not sure what that was). The man met back up with me and told me that he was going inside for some reason, I followed. The interior of the hall looked exactly like a barn, exactly. The man and the girl began to talk and this is where the dream get’s extremely weird and out of place. He was put up for execution and executed soon after, although later he was somehow revived .
(I’m really not sure about this part, the more I think about it the more I can’t remember) This part somehow resembled a Facebook post I had read earlier about someone who had cancer and moved to Oregon to chose the way she wanted to die, so I did exactly that. There were two men standing by me, one of them was was the man that had rescued me. The man that rescued me had a rifle and the other man had a bat, although I chose to be executed by being shot. I was surrounded by family I believe and then I was shot.
There was a next part to the dream although there is no way I could remember it? I’m pretty sure my family was there though.

07.10.2014

Krauser Pierces Through My Chest and Kills Me (DILD)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I’m in a narrow hallway, and I’m encountering a dream character that resembles Krauser from Resident Evil 4. There’s several feelings of helplessness, and the overall setting of the dream gave an impression that things won’t turn out well for me. The environment seems to be some kind of aftermath of an explosion.

Based on the color of the ground, and the bland formatting of the building I’m in, there seemed to have been a laboratory here. There’s bits of metal and other scraps scattered all around the area, and random combustions of fire as well.


What’s weird about this environment is that it was fairly wide, but the space in which I can traverse was fairly limited; almost to the point where I felt it was intentionally done so I would only focus on the Krauser DC that’s slowly coming after me.

There’s a bit of discrepancies in validating whether or not I’m in a dream body version of me, or some alteration between Leon. What made me convinced it was the former presumptions is that I had full reign on how I moved in the dream itself while also being able to spectate myself from a behind the back third person perspective.

And seeking any means of escape was pretty much futile since I had to deal with him first. I knew something bad was going to happen based from personal experiences, but I still tried to defend myself from him. Naturally, I used whatever weapon I had on me at the time, which happened to be a regular pistol.

My plan was to go along with the logic of defeating this guy in the game, which would be shooting him in the legs in hopes that he would have one knee to the ground to expose his chest for me to shoot him before he gets back up from the relapse. For some reason, zooming in on the pistols iron sights shifted to a view as if I was using a sniper rifle.


The aiming aid consisted of a very thin white cross with some short perpendicular lines on each end; at least two for each side that seemed to have been formatted for me to get straight into focus, and maybe avoid using peripheral vision within that line of sight. The subtle smoke that wraps around the atmosphere makes things a bit blurry.


Almost suitable for the sake of giving off the dream-esque effect where the contours of things aren’t as rigid and defined. I shift my awareness from the sights back to a first person view.


Krauser doesn’t seem to look like the actual one, and has a few modifications for his visage, but with how I’m too engulfed with instincts to survive, I can’t render him out in detail except for the organic like arm blade he has.


I shoot his legs a few times, but it doesn’t seem to be working at all, but I still keep shooting. Then I get a sensation around my neck and head that my weapon is about to run out of ammo. Somehow, I’m redirected to an inventory screen, and I see that I’m fairly limited in options of which weapons to utilize to assess this seemingly futile endeavor.

I wanted to take out a grenade to see if I could cause substantial damage to him, and proceeded to do so, only to find that it doesn’t really seem to scathe him. I go back to the inventory screen, and I feel there’s more options for me to use, but I felt that while I’m doing that, he’ll only get closer and closer.


Kind of like playing Five Nights at Freddy’s, and you look into the camera too much, and Freddy, or one of them comes up to you and kills you the moment you take your eyes away from the camera. I keep shooting with my pistol, and I eventually run out of bullets.


Just as I was preparing to reload, he’s already close to me, grinning as he knows that any other attempts to attack him would be useless, and he uses the mutant organic arm blade of his to stab me in the chest. As he’s about to do this, I’m visualizing myself in the front from a third person perspective, and I watch as my mouth opens from the pressure, along with the air around me creating some kind of gushing sound effect.


I eventually shrivel up in my last movements and die, and blood is coming out of my mouth while the chest seems to be filled with a darker color of blood.

Funny thing is that I was imagining a few months back of how I would fight this guy again should he ever randomly show up; thinking I would find a way to win, but ironically, expectations of what will happen in a dream doesn’t always turn out to be the case, especially if one invested in a bit of time imagining themselves accomplishing whatever goals they had in mind.

Black is Non Lucid.
Blue is Lucid.

Lucidity: 2/5
Vividness: 3/5
Length: Very Short

I was trying to get to my friend's house that was down a highway. We were going as fast as we could, all the while dozens of other cars were doing the same. There was a little kid on a tiny bike going down the highway, in the middle of it all. He had to keep stopping and going again, since he fell and fell off his bike. I feared for him that he'd get hurt, and he did. My friend found the boy's bike, it was nothing more than a piece of metal now, and then they found the boy. He had a black ash all over his body, like an overcooked piece of bread. I told them to leave it, they said no, so he came with us.

When we reached this place that looked devilish because of all the dead animals around, I became lucid. The area was very dark, like something you'd see in Berserk. I jumped down off this ledge and then flew by willing it, mostly, up to this pillar of dead animal's heads. There was a bull's head staring at me with big eyes, and a crow with a very long orange yellow beak. I grabbed the head of the crow, willing it's beak to open. When it did, I feared it would bite me, but it didn't. I then put the bird's beak to a tree next to me and willed it to cut the tree in half. It didn't, so I closed my eyes (big mistake) and when imagined the tree getting cut in two. When I opened my eyes, the tree wasn't cut. My vision became black and I couldn't see anything, so I lost lucidity.

Then, there were these re spawns I had, I re spawned as the baby once, asking my friends to put a blanket over me so I could talk to my friend without creeping her out. Then I was in a space ship, still trying to find my friend. I was in my room on the floor doing something on the computer. Someone came into my room who I've never seen before, a nerdy looking girl. She was grateful to meet me, but I asked her to step outside so I could get dressed since I was in my underwear and t-shirt only. I got dressed and came out, we said a few things and then I left. I went in search of my friend again, this time going to the school. One of my brother's friends brought me there, it took a while. I found out that he wanted to talk to my friend Jake, who didn't go to this school, so we had to go back on the highway. We made it to my friends house, she was fine, she talked to me and everything, as usual. We were in a mall buying food and talking about how bad some of it was for you.

2:30 p.m.

I was in a bar. I met three guys. We talked a bit. I was interested in one, but as we were handing out numbers (I think I went around a fence to get to the other two), he went ahead (and I saw him through the fence). It was in a park. I looked for him but he's no longer around. I was able to get his e-mail though so I sent him a message.

I was in a hotel. We were there for an event. We went from one floor to another to get to the restaurant. We went through a series of... "tunnels". I don't know why there wasn't any elevator or stairs. Then we had to guess which tunnel door leads to the proper floor.

When we reached the restaurant floor (lower), I realized I left my wallet in the car (Who owns it? Is it open? Do I need to get the key?), so I had to go back. I walked around the restaurant first to check out some sweets (I woke up smelling sweets. I think someone cooked.).

I had to go back "up" through the tunnel, but I don't know which hole to get in. There was another guy who was looking for it and thought he found it. He was trying to open the door to the "ceiling". I then received a "message" on the lower left corner of my vision (like in Facebook). I then "teleported" to the proper floor, just beside the tunnel hole on the floor, and saw it open and the guy went up. I cheered and said I teleported. He seems happy and so are the other people there (salesladies?).

I was with some corporate guys on the stairway, but we're on a high floor, exposed to the elements. The stairs is outside the building somehow. I was thinking maybe I should have gotten a "height" accident insurance (in case I fall).

Somehow, we were done with whatever we needed to do at that floor. We went back down the tunnels again, this time going through a rather big and detailed circular (wooden) door.

We went there and saw a dead guy on the floor (we're in the parking lot area inside the building, on the higher floors). Somehow, I remember "seeing" the corpse earlier (probably when I was teleporting). There was a groundskeeper/janitor/guard there. I was with the guy (looks nerdy and around middle age). The guard said that he was killed because he has money. Maybe the guy who borrowed money from him killed him. There was also a guard dog. He has a leash, and the guard was holding it. I liked the dog, but then he growled low. I didn't feel fear. I looked at the nerdy guy, and he was shifty. He was afraid of the dog. I'm thinking the dog was just reacting to new, unfamiliar people, but I doubted it (just like I doubted the guard's words about the murder). The nerdy guy moved behind the dog and I followed him. The dog was still staring and growling at the location we left behind. The night is starting to crawl in. I told the guard to release the dog's leash immediately.

Then it was dark. I saw the moon somehow through the open spaces outside. The werewolf jumped in from somewhere above us. The dog was barking at it, but couldn't move because his leash is tied to the wall. I "sped up" and removed it from the hook (the leash looks flimsy enough but I didn't/couldn't cut it). Once the dog was released, I put on my claws and faced him together.

The alarm sounded, a mnemonic induction technique from LaBerge. I was seeing an area at night, with a McDonald's nearby. I was already lucid. I was also thinking of teeth, somehow, but I was also hearing the induction and paying attention. Then after five minutes, it repeated. Damn stupid alarm.

--

NOTES:

- I slept around 12:30 p.m.
- I slept on my right side.
- I was trying to focus on breathing and thoughts before sleeping.
- Felt so tired when I slept.
- I woke up refreshed, if a bit annoyed at the alarm.

This was one of the most powerfully frightening and sleep episodes to date.

I'm floating in a sensory deprivation tank. I chose to do an hour and a half session since it had been a long day. This experience happened in the later half of the float.


I'm listening to music. It's sort of a slow, funky R&B beat with a man singing directly to me. He has a wonderful, deep voice that sent me deeper into my comfort zone. I realize quickly that this isn't the wake up music for my session, it is all in my head. I smile, or at least I think I do, and continue listening for a whole, beautiful minute. It's amazing what your mind can create in sensory deprivation.

The music fades and a twitch brings me back to present. "That was wonderful," I thought. "That's more than enough to write about."

Reflecting back on all this, I now know I experienced a false awakening, and a very convincing one at that. So, in my false awakening:

I'm going to flip onto my stomach for the last 30 seconds of my float (sometimes when I know I'm about to get out of the tank, I lay face down for as long as I can hold my breath. It feels good on my back). My extremities feel numb, but I manage to flip over. I soon realize I'm paralyzed. I have no control over my legs or arms and worst of all, my face is under water. I begin to panic. A hot rush of survival fear rushes me through my situation. My mouth is muffled by water and my arms can't find their way to bang on the wall for help. I'm going to die. I hold my breath as long as I can until I realize there is no use fighting it anymore. I have to inhale. I choose not to have my life flash before my eyes, since I knew inhaling the super saturated salt water would burn out any sentiment I could gather, so I just decided to go for it. A moment of courage. With all my strength, I take a mighty breath. Farewell.

Woosh. I'm back in my real body, frantically trying to catch my breath and calm my nerves. I knew exactly what had happened, having experienced false awakenings and sleep paralysis before. Never have both happened simultaneously. I was rattled, I still am.

I accepted death. Rather than inhaling the salt water, I took the most refreshing gasp I've ever tasted. It was beautifully humbling experience.

My father died recently, so I go to a grief support group. I dreamed I was at one of my group meetings. I asked my group if any of them had any experience lucid dreaming. I asked them if seeing their dead parents was a lucid dream trigger. No one seemed to know what lucid dreaming was, except our facilitator. I keep slapping myself for not doing a reality check. Stupid me.

I dreamed it was the fourth of July. I was at my grandparent's house. My sister was building this elaborate construction out of wooden blocks. I messed part of it up, and it infuriated her.

Grandpa kept his car in the basement for some reason. The front window was covered with ice. He was scraping it off so we could go to an air show. It was like the Fourth of July/Christmas time. I was playing with these weird Christmas decorations, singing Christmas songs. The inside of the car was filled with snow.

Then we got to the air show. There was only one airplane there, and I was to fly it. So I flew it all around in crazy circles. It was fun.

Then I dreamed I saw myself in the mirror. My face was the same, but I was almost entirely bald, except for little rough patches of bloody hair. My scalp was covered with these huge awful oozing sores, and my ears had been like ripped off. I could see into my brain. And I said to myself, "I always knew I'd look terrible bald. I need to invest in a hat." It didn't scare me in the slightest.

I was at a mall getting all my gear from work. I knew I had to get my hair cut so I went to see if a hair place in the mall gave military discounts. I kept walking and suddenty was in a forest with a scoped rifle hunting some strange creatures near a lake. Cops showed up and started chasing me and suddenly, more people started chasing me also. I had a lot of guns and it reminded me of GTA. I shot at the people chasing me as I ran up a hill. There was a helicopter with Air Force insignias all over it and I knew it had been downed for a long time, so it became an attraction. When I got to the top of the hill, a little girl told me how, at the bottom of the a river, there was the 'Ultimate Gun'. The river she was talking about was dirty and with black oil. There was a way to enter and exit the river without dying and the girl showed me how. I grabbed the gun that was made of plastic tubing and killed people with it. The way the gun would kill people, is that it was open their mouths and the oil it shot would go into their stomachs and make them explode.
The area changed to a factory and when there was only 2 people left, I almost got caught a few times. Eventually. I killed everyone. 2 girls, which I recognized from plenty of previous dreams, were sitting down and they said "Now you die" and the whole world exploded. I remember opening my arms, embracing the blast. Everything went black and I said "Now I wake up."

Locked in a small, very dark room with my wife; I am assisting in her giving birth. All sorts of demonic shadows appear all over the wall. Ridiculous faces, ghosts, figures, and everything terrifying I can imagine appears in shadow form on the walls. Clouds of smoke and mist also briefly pass by out of no where. Just obscuring everything, and then gone a few seconds later. My wife and I suspect that she is giving birth to a demon baby. I am a little concerned about what the neighbors are thinking if they can see these shadows too.

The baby is born, and already has fierce teeth, a crazy look on his face, and solid, black eyes. Growling, it tries to bite both of us. I grab the umbilical cord, and swing it off my wife from there, dodging his fangs as he flies past me. While trying to swing him in circles above our heads to buy some time, he kicks a wall, causing him to fly toward me and land on my right arm. Before he can sink his teeth into me, I grab him by the back of the head with my left hand, pull him off, then grab his body with my right and just squeeze. This causes the umbilical cord to disconnect from him, and is really gross. Black liquid squirts out of it, and I jump back, losing grip on the demon baby. I feel my stomach turn to knots as he jumps down to the floor.

He runs around the room, free from my grasp, but still contained inside the room for now. Literally running really fast, while growling, and even jumping higher than I am tall, he chomps his teeth together like a dog, making loud biting noises. My wife and I skootch back on the bead some more as he jumps up next to it, biting the air, and looking at us. He seems to enjoy scaring us with his powerful jaws...

The next jump, I catch him, and try to kill this demon with a knife. But due to some dark magic, any knife wound immediately heals itself. Struggling to hang onto this creature, I grab a small axe that is hanging on the wall and sever the menacing head from the red veiny body. The demon dissolves into sparks and dust, crumbling to small ashes and then vanishing back out of this world.

I sit back down on the bed, enjoying the brief peacefulness of the aftermath.

Dream - Lucid

I was going into Dallas and I's bathroom. It was very dark. I had to get up out of bed to poop. I started to sit on the toilet, when Dallas came into the doorway and started coming towards the toilet.
"What are you doing? I have to poop!" I said. He kept coming. I got up. I assumed he had to poop too.
"Are you really gonna make me use the other bathroom?" I said. He didn't say anything. I took that as a yes. I started to head towards the doorway to our bedroom to go to the guest bathroom. Dallas started to shut the door to our bathroom. I then started to hear noises coming from the living room area, and started to panic a little. Someone was in our apartment. Before Dallas could shut the door all the way, I caught it with my hand. I said something like
"Dallas, someone's in our apartment!"
I started to panic, and all my vision went black. I tried to scream for Dallas, but nothing came out. I then realized that I had been dreaming, and decided to calmly wait for myself to awaken instead of panicking.

I then woke up on Dallas's chest. Phew, just a dream. I was so glad. I then started to hear noises again. I was really confused. Was I not awake? I started trying to wake Dallas up, but he was dead asleep. I pinched him, I tried to yell his name but again, it wouldn't come out. Really? Is this really a dream again?I thought to myself. Vision went black again, and then I woke up for real.

Another 10 minute nightmare. I wasn't asleep long at all.

~

I was at a bowling alley bowling with Dallas, but it was more like ski-ball; we were throwing smaller balls at the pins down the lane instead of an actual bowling ball. There was almost no one there; we were the only ones playing. Dallas then said something about how the bowling alley was closing for good soon; it was going out of business. I looked around and I could see why. It was so dead in there. I then went to throw my ski ball, but it slipped out of my hand and I accidentally threw it behind me.

I then saw a very small child, a male toddler, carrying what looked like a six pack of beer up to the lanes, but it was actually a six pack of ski balls.

~

I had these two cakes made for me. I was at work I believe. Both were big and delicious looking with cream cheese icing on them (freakin yum). One had off-white cream cheese icing with red decorations. I had to do something with them to keep them safe or something, I can't quite recall.

Then, I saw the outside of my apartment. Someone was coming up the stairs. It was daytime outside. Then, something happened; a roll in a bag of rolls died? And it seemed so inconsequential, but I couldn't proceed with anything at all now. It was like playing a Sierra adventure game, where you don't do something in the beginning of the game and you get to the end and you have to start all over. I had to "start over" from a point before that to see if there was anything I missed, anything I could do to prevent the death of the roll.

~

Yay insomnia! Again! Woohoo. Also these 10-minute nightmares are very puzzling to me. It has happened to me quite often in the past few months. I guess what I don't get it how am I dreaming without being in REM? I thought REM sleep came later in the sleep cycle? Like, I will literally be asleep for 10-15 minutes for these nightmares. There was one that I was asleep for about an hour. Anyone have any thoughts?

This morning I visited the doctor to get some blood taken. During the drawing process, I lost consciousness. The time in between was basically lost--I do not have any real solid feeling of "being" anywhere, except some flitting images or colors that my mind was attempting to process. I couldn't even really claim to have had a "self" at this point--basically just a feeling of confusion and bewilderment. In retrospect, I imagine this is what animals must feel like at times, and it was highly . . . disconcerting.

As I began to come out of it, in darkness, I had the distinct feeling of being in both a sitting position and a lying position, and it became crucial to me to understand which of these my body was currently in. Once I was revived (eyes open and conscious) I still did not recognize any of the people there (my doctor and two nurses) or where I was until my doctor explained what had happened. I tried to explain my confusion: "I didn't know where I was!" My doctor very compassionately nodded, as though he understood. Maybe he did. Very unpleasant experience--basically fatigued for the rest of the day with a mild headache.

So here was what came to me: was what I experienced coming out of the state (or within the state? hard to say) an example of what death will "feel" like? If so, I can only say I expect it will be terrible--at least the dying part.

8/10/2014

Chapter I: Three Travelers
I don’t remember the events preceding but somehow some friends and I had come across three hikers in the snow. We were in a forest in the middle of winter. The forest was somewhat thin. The hikers were injured critically and were suffering from hypothermia. They had amnesia and had no idea what had happened or where they even were. Somehow we were able to surmise that there had been an avalanche and they were caught in it. We got them back to my apartment and took care of them. I do not remember how the hikers looked but I do remember talking with one of them. A young woman (probably mid to late 20s). I think she and I had an engaging conversation. I have a feeling that she shared with me aspects of her life that were of importance to her. I remember feeling particularly bad for her because her injuries were much more severe. I left her wondering if we would get a chance to speak again…we didn’t. She died the next morning.

Chapter II: Necromancy
There once was a man who believed in ghosts
“I know them, I hear them, I see them,” he’d boast
I worked with this man, I knew him well
How this came to be, I couldn’t tell
He came one day and shouted, “Come look!”
“Look what I have! A magical book!”
“This book is special,” he said to me.
“Open this book and ghosts you will see.”
The book was black, a green skull on the front
It looked rather trite if I could be blunt
“How does it work?” I asked this guy
“Open the book, it will blow your mind!”
“There’s a portal! A portal! A portal inside!”
“That allows you to meet those who have died!”
So I opened the book and so there was
A window inside to ghosts abuzz
The ghosts were green and had red eyes
Then I heard a voice, “Have you lost your minds??”
I look and I see, a woman is there
I don’t recall her looks, not even her hair.
The woman came up and then she said.
“What is your problem? Are you sick in the head?”
“Now listen here and listen you,”
“Those ghosts are hostile. They’ll rip you in two!”
What happens next, I cannot recall.
So our chapter ends here. That is all.



Chapter III: Zero-G
It was a normal work day in the backroom at Walmart. It was the latter part of my shift and by this time I was doing picks. I was going to speak with coworker, Sean, about something when suddenly I saw him lift off of the ground. Soon after, I was off the ground too. We, along with several others there, were floating towards the ceiling.
“God damn it!” Sean exclaimed, “Some idiot turned off the gravity again!” Fuck ups were commonplace at the store I worked but until now I had no idea that there was gravity plating beneath the floors of the backroom. I questioned the need for such a thing in a place like this and who on earth would have been stupid enough to reverse the gravity plates (which we apparently have)? I began to consider the consequences of what would happen should I break though one of the skylights. I began to panic at the thought of floating out into space and being lost forever. Anxious, I began to claw at the shelving just beneath me. My fears were unfounded as the gravity plates were set right and we all floated back down. I was embarrassed for panicking the way I did.

Chapter IV: Night Ride
For some reason, my car was out of commission so I had no other alternative but to ride my bike to work. The moon shone brightly in the sky as I rode through the commercial district of one of the small towns. Before I knew it there was a whole line of bikes ahead of me and behind me along with a few cars. I loved riding in this makeshift convoy. But my bike was uncomfortable because the handle bars were low so I pulled over onto the median, making sure to stay out of the way of the other riders, and pulled the handle bars as high as I could. So I rode on but the handle bars were still too low for me and it was very uncomfortable to ride. At the next light, I lowered my seats and was very grateful to the people behind me for their patience as the light had turned green as I was adjusting. They were all very cool about it and didn’t say a word. So I rode on and now I was comfortable. I vaguely remember making friends with a girl who was riding with us but I don’t remember much of the details behind that.
I got to work and was ready to start unloading the truck. My heart race when I thought I heard my supervisor say that we had a 7000 piece truck to unload. I asked him again and I was sure he had said 7046 this time! Which was odd because I could see inside the truck and it didn’t look like that much. I walked up to him and asked how much we had to unload that day and I clearly heard him say 1746. A sigh of relief left as we started to unload the truck. I had a good feeling about tonight. I had a feeling that this was going to be a good night.

Chapter V: The Machine
There was a scientist who had managed to set up shop in the back rooms of Walmart. He was trying to work a machine that could open up portals to other worlds. His attempts were futile as the machine had never worked. But perhaps now it would. You see, this man had an ace up his sleeve. A young boy probably around thirteen or fourteen. This boy was his a assistant.
He turned to this boy and said: “You there! You will be the one to power this machine! The power to make this work will come from you!” The man pulled out a small empty plastic box that was connected to the machine with a couple of wires. The boy stepped in and sat down in the box without saying a word. The man then activated the machine. Exact details of what happened next I cannot recall, I just vaguely remember sporadic bolts of electricity and the ultimate failure of his machine followed by curses from an angry scientist.
“Damn! Damn! Damn!” He shouted, “Why didn’t it work!? Damn it, Boy! Why didn’t it work? Why didn’t my machine work!?” But the boy did not answer. He was dead.

To start off this dream journal I wanted to include this lucid entry because it was the first time I felt like I reached a newer level of dream control I seem to be on now, and it wasn't too long ago that it happened. This came at the very end of the month of May, and is the last vivid lucid I can recall before the one I had two nights ago. I don't recall exactly if there was more dream leading up to this part, but I'm just going to include the significant piece of it that I can remember.

I found myself wandering around a very large house with an impressive artistic design; it felt like the kind of place that someone with a lot of money to waste might pay a skilled architect to build into a natural setting. The main thing that I can remember about it was that it was sort of blocky and there were a lot of beige colors. I was walking through what appeared to be something like the living room, but a huge one, and there were many other people walking around as well. I don't recall who exactly this might have been anymore, but I just know that I saw a celebrity or otherwise someone who I just knew shouldn't be there, and upon that realization I became lucid.

Out of nowhere, several police officers started raiding the house. I wasn't quite sure exactly what they were trying to find, but I did know that I didn't really care to find out. People were starting to run around in a panic as if they had something important to hide, and I knew that I had to do some quick thinking to figure out a way to dispose of the officers if I wanted to actually explore this dream in peace. I didn't find much to work with after a quick glance around the house especially with all of the people everywhere in my way, so I ended up frantically running outside to try to come up with a plan.

When I got out there I saw that we were located in the middle of a forest, though the trees weren't placed together too thickly so you could still see beyond them to a horizon in the distance. It was very picturesque, and added to the feel of how I described the house before. There still wasn't much out there for me to go on though, so I had to make a split-second decision. I felt my desperation welling up inside me, and I decided to focus that emotion as much as I possibly could into my dream control. Acting purely on instinct, I realized that energy into the first thing that I could possibly think of, which began happening simultaneously as it entered my mind: a tidal wave to simply wash the whole situation away.

There was a deep roaring as the massive tsunami started visibly and quickly rising up over the horizon in the distance, and within seconds had reached the point of blocking out the sun in the sky. I hurried back over to the entrance to the house that I had originally come out of because it placed the house directly in the path between the tsunami and myself, and soon after the water came crashing down on to the terrain around me. However, something I noticed as I looked into the house was that all of the people were suddenly gone. Was there even a point to this in the first place? The water was starting to burst into through all of the windows, shattering the glass everywhere, and it was all building up and approaching me quite realistically. As the intense torrential force hurled towards me, my last lucid thought was that this may not have been the best idea to summon.

Once the water hit me, I died instantaneously. However, the dream still continued to progress, just from a third-person perspective. "I" was now seeing a bird's-eye view of what appeared to be an extremely large and extravagant fountain which appeared to be at the base of a cylindrical room in the center of some ancient temple which conveyed a lot of power. There was a very geometric design to the flow of the water which came from the fountain, carrying it in a series of circles from the top of the structure to the circle around it and then outward from the room. My camera angle was spinning just slightly, very slowly to one side. There were also I believe four completely bronze-colored, metallic-looking, and quite muscular male human shapes who were all floating into the air in four corners around the fountain with their arms outstretched to the ceiling.

For the duration of this experience there was an emotion that this fountain is the temple that "I" was observing actually exists in another dimension outside of our own, and is in some way a metaphysical resting place for many different worlds including our own. The water that was flowing out of the fountain was felt to in fact be a divine stream which would inevitably bring the end of each world when its time came, and it was inherently understood that the tsunami which I had summoned was actually the wave that came to end our world. Unknowingly, I had brought upon the end of our existence as we know it, which is possibly why my perspective was switched to this vision to begin with. This was all interpreted conceptually in a matter of a seconds, and once this flash of imagery passed, I awoke.

The significance of this lucid dream for me was that I had never before been able to so effectively and effortlessly summon something as enormous and powerful as that tidal wave which I merely pulled up on a whim. This gave me some new ideas about attempting to alter a dream scenario by channeling my emotions into my abilities, which my most recent lucid (the one after this one) seems to have reinforced fairly well. Since this was the only dream I had like this that came significantly before I created this account, I figured it would be good to record it for future reference.

Dream - Lucid

I was at work, but it looked different. We were behind the counter. I was there with a couple of other people. There was one girl there who looked very tired. She had long, straight light brown hair and very tired eyes. She was probably about my age (25) or a bit younger. She needed a ride home from work. We got into my car. I was kind of tired too. The car was driving, but I noticed that I was sitting in the back seat with the tired eyed girl.
"I should probably be sitting in the front," I said to her. I stopped the car as we were going through this gate and got in the front seat.

Then, there was this lively old woman with us. She was quite energetic. She wanted us to drop her off on the side of the road so she could walk to her vehicle. We did just that. We got out though as well. We were walking on the sidewalk with this woman. She had a cane, but she wasn't using it. In fact, she started to jog! We couldn't keep up with her. We then were approaching her vehicle, or at least what we thought was her vehicle. It was a golf cart. It had a black bag with a big bow on it strapped over the seat. I thought she had been very trusting to leave that outside. Upon further examination, the golf cart had this HUGE control panel. It was so big, it took up the entire front window; you could not see out of it at all. I figured that maybe it drove itself. The old woman sat down in the seat, and was wondering how you worked it. I guess it hadn't been her vehicle, but a special vehicle that the public could use to get from place to place. There was a guy there that I assumed she was asking. We walked past her and the cart.

I dropped the tired girl off, but noticed something as I was driving. I noticed that the cart with the lady had not moved, but there were dead bodies strewn on the street by the car, about three or four of them. Holy crap, someone came and murdered them! I thought maybe a fight had broken out and gotten taken too far. I returned to the area where the cart was and saw what I had feared: The old woman was dead, along with a few others. I think I asked someone who was there if she was dead, and they said yes. I told them I had seen the scene from a distance. I started to cry.

Then, one of the people whom I thought was dead, a blonde guy who was probably in his twenties, opened his eyes. He looked like he was in so much pain. He said nothing, but his eyes told me everything. I was broken down crying now at this point, kneeling on the ground. I started to stroke the guy's knee to comfort him. I was so happy he was alive, but I still could not stop crying. It was then that I noticed that all the other people were literally torn apart; I saw someone's head detached from their body, an arm, and other torn apart body parts. The man with his eyes open in front of me was the only one who was not torn to shreds.

~

I was going to my friend Cherie's apartment. It was daytime outside and sunny. My husband may or may not have been with me, I can't quite remember. I think we had just gotten back from a vacation.

We got to the apartment. It was much different than IWL. It was more of a town home than an apartment, and was white and clean on the outside. There were many others that looked the exact same, as you would see in a town home community. I went inside, and Jeremiah and Cherie' were there in the living room. I went into the middle of the living room.

Then, I noticed Cortney D., a supervisor from my old job. She was standing behind the couch (at this point the apt looked a lot like my current one IWL). I "remembered" that she lived in the same complex as Cherie'. She had her hair pulled back into a small ponytail, and was wearing a black shirt with a colored shirt (can't remember the color) underneath; it looked like an outfit she would wear to work. I was excited to see her, because I always really liked her, but was afraid she would be mad at me because of the way I quit. I got her attention, and she said
"Krista." She walked up to me with a sense of urgency. She continued,
"Why did you do that?!"
I tried to explain to her how awful that job was, how bad I felt we were all treated there, but she kept countering me, asking me what did I expect, it's retail. She then stormed out. I was sad that she was angry, and I kept thinking of other things I should have said, but none would have made her feel differently. I didn't understand how she could continue to settle for such a crappy job.

Other things happened after this. I remember leaving the apartment, but nothing else.

~

I was driving to my old college's campus in a new car. It was a dark grey sedan, and very nice-looking. I felt weird and tired. It was morning. I don't know why I was going there. There was some kind of big event taking place.

I parked in a gravel lot, and walked over to where the buildings were. I sat down on a bench underneath an overhang. I noticed that lots of college kids were walking around dressed up like it was Halloween. I saw people in knight costumes, and I think some Mortal Kombat costumes as well. I did not know what was going on.

I then realized that they were in the marching band, and today was the day that the college hosted Contest of Champions, a high school marching competition, and that they always performed a show at intermission in their Halloween costumes (this is true IWL). All the college kids then started to dance with each other. It was like they were a flash mob; they all just seemingly spontaneously started to couple off and dance. I knew that they had planned it.

I got up to go back to my car. I went into the field where the cars were. There were many, many more now. I clicked my clicker on my keys, and some tail lights light up, so I figured I had found my car. But then, another man, an older, heavier black gentlemen, got in the driver's side. Whoa, I thought, there must be some mistake. I opened the trunk to the car, which was actually more like a minivan than a sedan. Not my car after all. I felt embarrassed for trying to get into another person's car, though he did not say a word to me about it. I kept walking.

I kept on clicking my clicker, and I noticed that when I did, other cars' headlights would flash. What the hell? How was I ever going to find my car now?

I then was at an impasse, literally. I had approached a fenced in area. The fence was wooden and old, and actually relatively short. The only way I could get to the other side of the fence was to open up the old wooden gate. I then called an old friend, Tori, and asked her about the car, because I knew that she had had a car like mine. She said that hers had done that too, unlocking other people's cars instead of hers. When I got off the phone with her, I went to go open the gate, but it was covered in spiderwebs! I could not get a hold on it without touching one. I saw the webs up close, and noticed that lots of ants had gotten caught in the web. I saw one get caught in it towards the top of the fence. Ugh. So gross...I hate spiders. So I looked all over the fence for a place I could touch it without getting web on my fingers, and there was none. I put my hand on it regardless, and immediately took it away again. I saw the holes in the web where my fingers had pierced it. I then briefly opened the gate, but I couldn't even go through it without walking into webs. It only opened on the bottom anyhow; I would have had to push to get it to open all the way. I considered climbing the fence. I don't remember if I ended up doing it or not, but I knew it was an unacceptable thing to do for some reason.

Then, I was in some sort of bakery/coffee shop on campus. The interior was all wooden, and since it was summer, there were only a couple of people there. I thought maybe it was closed for the summer. I then noticed the manager, a middle-aged woman, standing in the doorway talking with another woman who looked a bit younger. She was blonde with glasses. I thought to myself that the manager must have to be here every day, even during the summer when their hours were limited. The table I was sitting at was one with Eileen, a woman from my old job. She was a regular there. I think she was eating doughnut holes. She was talking to me about coming to that place every day for breakfast. I don't remember anything else from the conversation, but we talked a bit. I think I also ate a doughnut hole. It was glazed. I think they were homemade.

~

I was working on a project for a class at my apartment. I was working on it on the bed. It was supposed to be a circular cut out with whatever we liked to put in it in the center. I decided to do mine like a collage, with cutouts from magazines in it. I was going to put some pictures that I had of me, friends, and family on top of the magazine cutouts. I also was painting it. I had painted the edges of the circle green, but noticed I had gotten some paint on the sheets and on the pillowcases. Nothing I could do about it now, though. I painted some shades of blue on the inside as well, and noticed that I had made the top of the circle a light blue, and it gradually faded to a darker blue. It wasn't my intention, but I liked the way it looked.

I had made the inner circle separate from the outer. The outer was a cut out of some construction paper that I painted green. I made the entire inner circle, and put the outer circle around it to see if it had the correct measurements. It wasn't perfect, but absolutely workable. The outer circle was a little big or small at just one area, the bottom right corner. I knew it wasn't going to be a difficult fix. I think I asked my husband about how it looked. At this point, it kind of looked like a pokeball.

I kept thinking about the assignment, and wasn't sure if I was doing it right or not, but I didn't remember the teacher, who was the black man from my precious dream, saying anything too specific.

Someone else was then in the apartment, a girl who was also a student. I asked her something about the assignment, about the specifics. She wasn't sure either.

~

You might see my recall of last night and say "Damn, Krista, you must have gotten some good sleep to have all these dreams." That would be my first thought too, but I actually did not sleep well at all. I kept waking up every hour, and would have a lot of trouble going back to sleep. I know I dreamed way more than this too, but these are the only ones I remember. My husband also was having trouble sleeping, and he had a lot of vivid dreams as well. We made turkey burgers last night, and never have made them before. That's the only thing I can come up with for why neither of us could sleep, and we both had super vivid dreams.

Dream - Lucid

I was in what was supposed to be my apartment. I had married my husband, but also this girl I know from my old job named Whitney, who, IWL is a lesbian. I was laying on the couch in the living room, and I thought to myself that I wasn't sure how I felt about marrying a woman, but I had asked her to marry me. I then thought about my husband, and I felt better. I remember they walked into the room and Whitney came over to the couch. She was dressed a lot more girly than she ever does IWL; she had bright red lipstick on. She and I gave each other a little kiss on the lips, and I thought to myself I had never kissed a girl before. Then, either I thought about or someone asked me about whether or not the marriage would be recognized in Tennessee.

~

I was working my last day at my old job, though the area looked much different. The registers were all in the same area of the store, close to a wall, and the walls were all white. I remember speaking with Jaime, one of my old managers, and asking her if it was ok that I was there because I hadn't shown up for my last three shifts. I don't remember her exact response, but she said it was.

I was checking people out at the registers. I remember one of my old supervisors, David, being there helping to check people out as well. One of the "higher-ups", as I like to call them, was checking himself out. At the time I did not see this as weird, but IWL, that is definitely not allowed, even for the "higher-ups". He was a black man who resembled one of the IWL district managers, though, in the dream, I never saw his face, only his back. I went to go help him bag his things. He was buying many of the same dress, a spring/summer dress for a young girl. I think it was white and a soft, minty green color with thick tank top sleeves (as opposed to spaghetti strap sleeves). I was neatly piling the dresses on the counter, one on top of the other. I don't remember what he said to me first, but I said
"I'm helping you bag."
He then laughed at me and said something else. Whatever he said really pissed me off, though. I walked out of the register bay, and was looking at his back. The next thing that came out of my mouth was
"Well I hope you have a nice fucking day!"
I knew I would get in trouble, but I didn't care. It was my last day anyway, and this guy deserved it. What a corporate douche. I thought David would get pissed at me for it, but again, I really didn't care.

~

I was going to a funeral for my grandpa (IWL he passed away on Memorial Day). I remembered him being alive recently, and my brother and I speaking with him. He was smiling and laughing as we talked.

I was in the funeral home with my brother. It was spacious and had lots of seating. I don't remember anyone else being in there though. The room seemed empty.

Then, I found out someone from my new job, someone my brother had worked with also (he works for the same company I do IWL), had passed away. It was a very kind, older white man who was short with a white mustache and white hair. We were then at his funeral. I remember sitting in the very, very front of the funeral home with my brother. I remember crying, but I wasn't able to remember the man's name, and neither was my brother. I kept going back in my memory, trying so hard to remember, and I kept coming up with George Lopez, but it didn't sound right. We were saving a seat for my old store manager at my old job, Sherry. She came in and sat next to us. I still could not remember the man's name, and I kept on thinking and thinking about what his name was.

Well, there you have it, my first DJ entry in over a year. I didn't get too much sleep last nigh, probably didn't end up asleep until almost 4am, unfortunately, so I'm surprised I remember three dreams. But hey, no complaints from me. I love dreaming.