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Date of Dream: SUN 21 MAY - 2017



Dream No. 117 - Separated Sections

Dream 117 A - Stack 'Em High (Lucid Dream 7)
I forgot how I became lucid but I knew I was lucid because I was always consciously aware of things. I was in a small storeroom with this large filing cabinet of three levels. On the third level, there was some nest with one egg inside it. I was ambitious about getting the egg out of that nest for some reason. The first thing I did was call for Dreamy WB.

She entered the storeroom very quickly after I called. First, she ended up giving me the biggest hug ever in dream history and I am not joking when I say this. In the dream, I said that hugging her was like hugging a really soft sponge... We hugged for quite a long time. Then she helped me by lifting me up to the nest. It's like she was partially lifting me and still hugging me at the same time. Still, I couldn't reach it. So then Mr. B came in and he lifted Dreamy WB up. So the chain was now Mr. B on the ground, then Dreamy WB, then me who this time, successfully got the egg. I don't remember what happened after that.

Dream 117 B - Demolished Grounds
I came to Killester for a visit and my main objective was to look for WB. As I made my way to the quadrangle area, most of the place looked destroyed like a mini world war 3 had broken out. Additionally, there were these metal wire construction fences blocking off some areas, including the walkway from the year 9 area to the oval. To get over the fence, I once again found myself using the Balloon Mario method based on Super Mario 64 DS. When I got over the two lots of fences, I made my way to the oval. When scanning the oval, there was no WB... Only junior PE classes in action.

So turned back and went to the edge of the quadrangle. When there, I assessed my surroundings again and thought that maybe WB was having English in the library. Usually, there is an accessible staircase next to the art rooms but in the dream, there was not. The only available staircase was the main one where the lift was. So I went back over the fences and then scanned the area where the staircase was... Supposed to be! The main staircase was non existent, at least so I thought. There were remnants of the top half of the staircase in which the bottom half had been broken off like the school had demolition day. I looked to see where there were accessible stairs. I eventually caught sight of the newly placed staircase which does not exist in the waking life Killester.

Leading up to the staircase was this long wooden walkway and in the middle of the walkway, I noticed Mr H conducting a choir. Still, I thought I'd stop by the choir in case WB was in that... But I soon noticed she wasn't. There were a lot of girls and so the space of the walkway was very crowded. Additionally, some strange gravity was always making me fall backwards and almost tip over off the walkway. Eventually, the weird gravity started to affect the girls in the choir as well.

The dream scene then skipped to me talking to my mum in the car. I was saying to her that I was going to stay longer as I realised the year 12 graduation assembly was today. Either I don't remember what happened after that or I woke up.



V Behind The Scenes V

116 A: Why Lucid?
Although Dream No. 116 A followed a non lucid plot, I felt like I was really aware of my surroundings and the things that were happening. When I am non-lucid, my goals appear to be blurred and I sometimes use crazy methods to get them... Like you know what you want but then at the same time, you're not sure how to reach that goal. In a lucid dream, I clearly know what I want my first resort is to call Dreamy WB. It's sad that I don't remember how I entered the lucid state as it would have been good to write the reality check here to prove it to anyone reading... As well as just to basically share insight on how I got lucid, not just that I was lucid. I think I might do a comparison chart below as to what non-lucid dreams feel like, compared to lucid dreams.

Non-Lucid Dreams
1. Summoning Dreamy WB
There are multiple approaches in non-lucid dreams. First, I find myself looking for her
rather than just calling for her. Also, I sometimes my get the real version instead of
the intended dream guide. Although I'm in non-lucid dreams, I can still tell who is who,
even in the slightest personality differences... It doesn't always have to be nice and
nasty. Sometimes, they're both nice but the real one acts more informal and teen like
whereas the dreamy figure acts more motherly like. Basically, she's unpredictable in
non-lucid dreams and sometimes, I can't even get her at all.
2. Interacting With The Environment
Anything can happen in a non-lucid dream. Also, it's like the environment controls me.
I can't really interact with the environment fully, I can only do what it tells me to do. For instance, I know I could have reached WB's place if I wanted to but because it was a
non-lucid dream, I remained lost because I was unable to command an instant change,
rather the plot just flowed as it was going to, all the way until the end of the current REM
cycle.
3. Ambitions
My goals aren't so straight forward. Additionally, I find I may only set a certain task if a
problem arises first. I guess dreams would be meaningless if there wasn't a storyline to
follow along to.
4. Dealing With Problems
In non-lucid dreams, the solution doesn't come to me straight away. Additionally, I may appear scared of confused in front of the enemies I face. Even if I start out strong, I feel
the enemy always finds a way to weaken me before my dream ends. Especially in nightmares, I am completely helpless and cannot even feel my dream guide's energy around anyway.
5. In Summary
The dream tells me what to do. The more violence, the less I can feel energy and instead, I feel rather deserted and lost.

Lucid Dreams
1. Summoning Dreamy WB
This works pretty much all the time! The first thing I do when I realise a lucid state is call specifically for Dreamy WB. Additionally, if there is no response, the lucid state allows me to keep persevering whereas in a non-lucid, I could risk losing focus. In lucid dreams, she always arrives promptly and greatly assists with the task at hand.
2. Interacting With The Environment
I find that I interact better with the environment, having a connection to it rather than being the environment's puppet. I can actually also assess the sensations. For instance, I may not have described Dreamy WB's hug so vividly if I wasn't lucid. Additionally, in Dream No. 93, I knew it was fading, whereas if I was non-lucid, I wouldn't have realised that the dream was exiting.
3. Ambitions
In lucid dreams, I know what I want and am able to stay focused, even if non-lucid aspects of the lucid dream try to set me off course. Most importantly, I find myself having an ambition as soon as I enter lucidity, there is no hesitation.
4. Dealing With Problems
So far in lucid dreams, I haven't encountered any real evil yet. I predict that it would be the same as the above 3 points. I predict Dreamy WB going to the root of the problem rather than me having to go on a quest to get help. Also, I think I may be able to assess the dangers before making a move rather than suffering from a wrong choice, influenced by non-lucid plots.
5. In Summary
I have a higher awareness and I actually know what I want, rather than being lost and confused and just pushed around by a pre-written story plot. Additionally, since Dreamy WB can be summoned from the start, nightmares won't be a lonely, heart attack causing encounter

I was in a cabin of sorts. I was with friends. I baked/cooked a cake for another friend whose birthday won't be on till after a few months. I thought of putting it in the fridge. For some reason, they had some reasons not to put it in some fridge located somewhere. One was in that cabin but for some reason, we had to move. Something about disturbing the spirits. We also thought of putting in the house fridge but won't the person find it easily?

We "went out" of the place using a special key and a special door. We traveled through the spirit realm (why?). And we walked and avoided and escaped the malevolent spirits of the realm. There were two particular spirits we avoided: one was a male shadowy figure that follows us and one white ragged woman who screams and chases us. I remember hiding behind some crates and avoiding her. There were also some "puppy spirits." At least they looked like puppies. They were used by a teacher and some children to practice escaping from. There "attack" in swarms. I was going through a door when a swarm rained in. I led them out the door with difficulty but without any negative emotions whatsoever.

Somehow, I was caught and I felt my physical body turn to the left. I was told in the dream it's wrong and somehow spirits can enter that way.

This part happened somewhere in between. There's no linearity in the dream (like in some dreams). I was with a family flying through space. We went through zero space, and we've "heard" about some delays in such a travel but thought they were rare occurrences and don't have any serious repercussions. There was a boy (third-person) in this family who seems to have such a delay and asked where the others were and what took them so long. For the rest, it was an almost instant flight. I was that boy (first person).

We were being chased by other space fighters (I don't know the name of the small space ships used to harass bigger ships without causing a lot of damage due to the energy shielding). I had a hard time with the controls. I turn too fast so instead of arcing back, I end up facing the enemy almost face-to-face with our ship. The rest were away. I was eventually able to control it enough so I see... stars and space and space stuff instead of a poorly modeled image of the fighter or the nearby planets and moons. I felt elated.

My ship was destroyed. I was possessed.

I was in a familiar place. I think it's the place in the "first" part of the story. I was kept in a room, and I felt different. I felt like I was glowing and there's a tingle throughout my "skin." I overheard that a woman (a friend?) was partially possessed. I went out/through the walls and doors and approached her in a room. I "absorbed" whatever was possessing her and I left. I felt stronger.

I think this is a separate story but somehow still connected to the possession dream. I was at home. It was evening and very dark. We went home and closed the gate, but somehow, someone forgot to close one of the two gates. There's like another perimeter around the house, and there are two boys/guys just outside the inner perimeter, which means the outer one was open. A child was talking but I could barely understand. Mom was saying something too complaining about the other gate not being locked.

I was outside the house. It was morning, or at least daytime. Someone was teaching me how to fly properly. I was able to "jump" on the first level with his help and then jumped the next two after. I looked up and saw the clouds. I was elated. I wanted to fly about the clouds and stay there. I was partially lucid and happy to be able to experience that.

Everything was falling apart. Buildings were crumbling down. Alien attack? It was like a game in 3D. I used my possession skills to hold back falling buildings and debris. I felt powerful.

I woke up feeling powerful and in control.

---

Notes:

- I went to sleep feeling down. After a few days of anxiety due to an overwhelming addition to my required subjects to take to finish school, I had my previous dream that really brought me down. I could barely do anything so I went to sleep. That was around 7:30 pm. I woke up around 10:00 pm. I thought the dream was so long I could swear I woke up around 3 or 4 am.
- I felt powerless these several months, from failing to finish some courses I need to proceed with my long-term plan to being unable to complete Inktober or start NaNoWrimo (again). I think I was trying to regain control by putting an enforced structure (school).
- There were a lot of mental chats that had no image. I was talking to myself about the meaning of the dream within the dream. A short while after(?) waking up but still lying down, I thought about how I reclaimed a part of myself (through possession and self-destruction) and it made me (feel?) stronger.

Questions: How do I know this feeling of control is not as illusory as the feeling of lack of control? Both have real-life repercussions if wrong, and even if right, how do I distinguish what's within and without my control? How do I know I'm making the right decisions if my senses and mind betray me?

For now, back to basics: simplify.

Ritual: Set vibrating alarm for 40m at 6:20am. I don't remember it going off, but I began dreaming that I was trying to fall asleep, until it gradually dawned on me that I was already dreaming. It was 7:19 when I awoke, so given that the dream must have manifested at some point after the signal went off at 7am (since it was not interrupted by it), it could have lasted up to 19m. I'm classifying this as DILD and not EILD since lucidity was not initiated by recognition of the device signal.

DILD: Initially I am on a beach, lying on a sort of cot, trying to fall asleep. There are other people all around me, and their activity and noise is keeping me awake. I mention aloud to someone nearby that I seem to be entering REM state even while awake, as I notice crisp and colorful visuals superimposing themselves over my visual field. Even though the new scene is layered over the old one, it is distinct enough that I can make out details: I am at the edge of a river running through a futuristic city. Some sort of V-shaped flying craft is flying in tripartite geometrical formations up above, the crafts each giving off light colored red, white, or blue, each grouped into a separate section. Is this meant to be a patriotic display?

I do not change position, but the cot I'm lying on becomes a sort of couch as the environment around me resolves into a room full of kids. Someone plays a video on a TV monitor, which annoys me because I am trying to fall asleep and the music is distracting. But then they mention that the video features Jonathan Tweet, and the name sounds familiar. When I remember it is one of my favorite game developers, I take more interest in the video and sit up.

Something makes me think this is a kind of school where the kids are learning lucid dream abilities. One boy, bald, sits to the left of me on my couch and he's trying to test his powers against me. He takes my hand in his, which begins to glow blue, and I realize that he's trying to "crystal" me, that is, harm me with the pale blue light he is creating. I counter it easily, however. This frustrates him and he begins trying to bite me. He opens a disturbingly wide mouth and tries to chomp down on my hand, but I counter him by softening both his flesh and his resolve, so that mouth sags toothlessly and he never completes the bite. We go through this cycle three or four times before I tire of the game and get up.

By now I'm aware that I am already dreaming, and I walk into the next room, recalling my personal goals. [I accomplish a personal task, finding a certain fictional character, then suggest that we become dragons to fulfill one of the TOTYs.]

I lead the way to a window and lift it open. We're about four storeys up, but I jump out without hesitation and spread my arms, letting the air catch me. As I fly off to the left, I focus on trying to develop the "feel" of a dragon body: four legs, wings, tail, scaly skin. I haven't tried this before and the results are so-so, a fluctuating hybrid between the new bodymap and my usual one. I am flying over what strikes me as a mid-twentieth-century city. There are no skyscrapers, just a mixture of low commercial and residential buildings that cover a wide expanse. I recall that the task requires me to destroy a village, but the city below seems too urban to qualify. Would a neighborhood count as a "village"? But my moral qualms kick in, and I hesitate to bring wrath upon an innocent residential neighborhood.

I fly further on, toward the edge of the city, looking for a more remote target, preferably one with few occupants. After exploring the land for a while, I find a spot that, while a stretch to call it a "village," at least satisfies my ethical preoccupations: it is a cluster of buildings around a large industrial apparatus, evidently a manufacturing concern of some kind. I don't notice any people wandering around, so hopefully there are not many on site to be harmed. I can't imagine I'll find a better target (at least in relation to my own concerns, rather than the specifications of the task), so I begin circling over the site, breaking the buildings and bashing them down. Meanwhile I focus on maintaining my dragon form; this takes constant vigilence because it is so unfamiliar, and too easily slips into sensations more congruent with human limbs.

What color dragon am I? I recall that D&D dragons can take many different colors, with corresponding breath weapons. On the ruins of the factory, I test acid and frost breath in turn, trying to decide which feels more natural. I like the effects of frost—after freezing metal walls solid they shatter in a satisfying way—but then I remember that the task specifies leaving flaming ruins in my wake, so I switch to fire. There isn't much in the way of visuals; rather than great gouts of flame, my fire breath is more of an intense heat that makes metal glow red. But I dutifully knock down and burn the factory into rubble.

Afterwards, I hover anxiously over the destroyed site to see if anyone was harmed by my stunt. (I know, I know, I make a terrible dragon.) I do spot someone—something?—running around frantically, but as I peer closer, it does not look human at all. Curiously, it appears to be a small white gem that I take to be a cubic zirconia, attached to a tiny wire loop that looks like it must have once been the pendant of an earring. The sense of scale has been skewing dramatically as I have been peering closer, and now I feel back to my normal human size and form, kneeling over ruined buildings the size of an architectural model. I look carefully and spot two more little gems running around. Unless there are more I don't see, three victims isn't too bad, and at least they're still alive, even if they're looking understandably anxious. (How do gems even look anxious? It was something in the way they moved.)

[I've been concentrating on my task and realize I have lost track of my friend. I look for him and we are briefly re-united before I wake up.]

17.10.2014

A kid false-awakens me and I find 27 kittens (Non-lucid)

NON-DREAM DREAM LUCID

I had a false awakening when I found myself being false-awoken by a kid who was screaming at me. For some reason this kid needed help to find something in the house, but as he was sharing this with me, I dozed off back to sleep and I could see that he was placing a piece of manchego cheese on my mouth:







I felt weird because I would not feel like cheese when I did not even got off from bed, but I was false-awoken once more from this same kid. Apparently, during my sleep I made a huge mess during the house, like if I was a zombie or something. I got out of bed and I found myself in a huge home, it had over 20 rooms and very high end decor, with a lot of upscale wooden furniture. Apparently, there was magic too at this places and there were some rooms under some spells.

I toured around the house with that kid's parents (and I believe now I was that kid) and they shown a few rooms. One of them, had a smashed piano and a lot of food sitting around:







In other room, it was like dark, with very dark blue colors and it was all messed up also. I was also taken to the kitchen, where the fridge was empty and open as well as damaged. The parents appeared pretty upset, but I did not understand what was going on. I tried to scape this place without success, so I was flying in confusion. I saw a huge crystal building, but I had no clue how to enter it, it had some sort of force-field.

A voice told me to follow a magical fish so I started to swim and saw some rocks that I could break. As I followed this being, I realized that it was a way to enter the house, underwater. As I got in, the home looked well furnished and apparently, I was going to live there now, and my wife appared out of nowhere. Now it was me again (in my real dream body) and there were 27 kittens sitting one next to each other on a huge bookcase. My wife told me now we owned all those cats. I wondered how my cats would feel about living with 27 more.

Ritual: I got fed up with the dry spell I've been having for the past couple weeks and took drastic measures. Back in 2010 I experimented a couple times with nicotine (in patch form) as a lucidity trigger, but quickly gave it up because I found it impossible to fall asleep with even a very low dose (half a 7mg patch, so 3.5mg). These days my problem—and the main thing hampering my lucid attempts—is that I've been falling asleep way too easily, so I thought there would be a good chance I'd be able to fall sleep wearing the patch and see if it had any effects on dreaming after all.

Went to bed at midnight, woke naturally at 3:30am and stayed awake until 5am, mostly reading, but finishing the WBTB with a brief seated meditation. I googled to make sure using nicotine patches well past their expiration date was advisable, but was reassured by what I found. So I took 200mg L-Theanine to make it easier to fall asleep, and applied a 7mg patch with half its surface covered, so 3.5mg total (though the dose might have weakened with age). I also worked on my mental motivation, not just intending but vowing to get lucid tonight.

When I returned to bed I felt my heart beating faster than normal, though I wasn't sure if it was the nicotine (if so the patches must be exceptionally fast acting, because this was only minutes later) or just a consequence of the excitement and anxiety of trying something new. The feeling reminded me trying to fall asleep on galantamine, which also has a very powerful stimulant effect. However, I started counting and was reassured (and somewhat surprised) when I began to lose my place already by the time I hit "ten." I reset and kept counting, rarely making it as far as "ten," and often not past "one," until I felt my mind had reached a place where I could easily fall asleep, then turned on my side to do so.

I fell asleep very quickly, although my intention to remain aware of the transition went nowhere—I just zonked out. I woke up almost two hours later with the memory of a DILD and least one FA. The dreams were definitely atypical in tone: the plot was epic and confrontational, which I attribute to the nicotine. The dream awareness was spontaneous rather than triggered, but the lucidity was at very low level. Worse, my dream recall was unusually vague and fragmentary.

DILD: The dream had a complex narrative that I can't satisfactorily recall. The most notable aspect was that my husband was in it and my dream logic concluded that it was a shared dream and that he was actually there and trying to learn the ropes of lucidity from me. We were trying to summon spirit allies, and he wanted a gryphon. The first version looked cartoonish, reminiscent of the monsters from Where the Wild Things Are, but it wasn't a proper gryphon. Neither were the next two, though they were massive, monstrous creatures that reminded me of the kinds of avatars you would summon in the later Final Fantasy games. When I summoned my own spirit ally, I was surprised to find that it was just a somewhat transparent virtual version of me.

(Source: I think this was day residue, as last night in ME3 my Shepard came across the holograph AI of herself on the Citadel. The notion of iconographically incorrect gryphons might have been inspired by the poor versions I saw in the astonishingly bad—so bad it was almost good, I couldn't stop laughing—film version of Hercules I caught the last fifteen minutes of on cable yesterday evening.)

I wish I remembered the plot of the dream more clearly. There was a group of entities that we were in conflict with, and they were insisting that I was breaking the rules of dream in some way. I disagreed, as I felt justified to do as I liked in my own dream, so I countered by exerting a massive field of control over the environment that made the ground shudder and shattered buildings. It wasn't quite an earthquake, more a gravity-reversing vibration: I have a mental image of dust and dirt rising and hovering in the air accompanied by an almost subsonic drone. It felt good to do this, powerful, though something of a guilty pleasure.

(Source: I was sure there was a waking life source for this image of dust rising from the earth in the wrong direction but couldn't remember; now it occurs to me that it might have been from the movie Transcendence, which I saw last month.)

At one point I had the presence of mind to wonder, or maybe someone asked me: was I actually hurting anyone by doing this? But I pointed out that you can't hurt DCs merely by disrupting their physical bodies, because the dream state does not have that kind of continuity. I demonstrated this by plucking my own spirit ally from deep in the rubble where she had been buried and reviving her.

I might actually have remembered somewhere in all of this to try the Patronus TOTM, which had been my intention before falling asleep, but if so I don't recall the outcome, unless that was somehow connected with the idea of spirit allies. Too vague to be sure, unfortunately.

FA: I woke up next to my husband and wondered if it had really been a shared dream, so I watched his reaction carefully. He gave me a look which led me to conclude that it had been. But before long it began to dawn on me that this might be a false awakening, and soon I was sure of it. I decided to review the events of the previous dream in my mind before I forgot, but as I was doing so, I became aware that my mind was interpolating new ideas, and whole new scenes were even taking place, spinning off from my memories of the previous plotline—this is the risk of reviewing dream memories while you're still dreaming!

For instance, when I thought about our spirit allies, a girl showed up at the foot of the bed who I took to be a transformation of the gryphon in the previous dream, only now she looked human and very familiar. I tried to place her face and decided she resembled the character "Marnie" from Girls. Not sure where that came from, as I haven't watched an episode of that since the last season ended.

Then when I was trying to remember the main plot, it became confused with a new plotline in which I was worried that war was imminent and that if it took place, the spirits of mythological creatures would fuse with nuclear bombs to create a weapon that was as devastating to dream as to the waking world.

I was out trying to investigate and prevent this outcome, and found myself in the house of people who had melee weapons shaped like real or imaginary animals. One was a rod with a sculpted head shaped like the head of an animal that mingled the qualities of a lizard and a single-horned rhinocerous. Another was a club shaped like a narrow stylized boar, and while my husband was handling it, I noticed that it could also be fired like a crossbow. Again, very random imagery.

Conclusion: I would call this a partial success at best, as the low-level awareness and limited recall made the overall experience less than satisfactory, and I didn't actually succeed in doing the TOTM that was my original goal. Still, breaking my dry spell by any means is reassuring. It definitely felt like nicotine had an effect on dream content, and I attribute the unusually "epic and confrontational" quality to its influence. However, after waking up I felt almost as uncomfortable and unrested as I do after using galantamine, so while I might experiment a little more along these lines, I will not be making this a frequent induction method—which is probably for the best, nicotine bad and all that.

Standing in a large warehouse, I hear a lot of noises and yelling up on the next floor. Some guy is really angry up there. I look up the stairs just in time to see a Molotov cocktail bounce down the stairs without breaking. My cell phone manages to allow me to create grenades, which I throw up the stairs at the angry guy. I can't see what happens, and then remember the Molotov cocktail seems more like a bomb, with a burning rag as the fuse. As it explodes, the shock wave sends me flying 15 meters through the air, landing face down in a man made river. I lay there disoriented for a bit, until I need to breathe again, and pull myself out.

The dream sort of resets a bit here, and the angry guy is not trying to kill me. We both need to charge my phone so that we can again have access to machine guns, grenades and other weapons. I must have an app that makes all this possible. We are riding in the back of a pickup truck to some place to plug my phone in. Arriving at my back porch in the winter, I plug it into an electrical outlet outside the house and let it charge.

The guy with me runs down the hill to my neighbor's house and starts destroying their yard. He pulls the fence out of the ground, throws it into the yard, and starts digging large holes quite quickly. I run down there to try to mitigate the situation. Holding part of the fence to try to put it back where it goes, my neighbor comes outside, sees me with the fence, next to the chaos, and assumes I am responsible for all of this. Before he gets a chance to say anything to me, a motorist pulls into his driveway, and asks how to get out because there's no room to turn around. My neighbor tells him to turn around in the street. The motorist doesn't listen, and instead turns around in the yard, leaving deep tire tracks that tear up the grass leaving deep ruts behind. My neighbor just gives up on his yard at this point, shaking his head in disappointment with humanity as he goes back inside.

The angry guy, still visibly angry, seems satisfied with the destruction he has caused, and gets back into the pickup truck. I'm standing in the back of it, looking over the cab as we drive off. My friend is driving us, and just as we turn onto a more substantial dirt road, his dog runs under the truck, out the front end of it, and down the road ahead of us much faster than we're driving. Briefly looking back at us over his shoulder, the dog gives us a look as if to say, aren't you coming with me?

The scenery instantly transforms into a cell phone store, where the salesman is talking me into upgrading my phone to a Galaxy or something like that for $35. It takes better pictures, but I don't know if it works like the iPhone in terms of music playback capability, so I hesitate to go for it. I ask the salesman about the app I currently have for explosives and machine guns. He tells me that one is no longer available on these newer phones. I am a bit bummed out about that.

It's been 7 months sense I last posted so I will do a lot of updating

This dream had a lot going on but the part I remember the best is the last part. I returned to my home where I lived with my parents, brother, and his fiancée. (The home was a complex that housed multiple families and it was raised above the ground) when I got back I found that this stranger was trying to steal my money, but I managed to run him off and get my money back. When I returned to my room afterwards I found that my stuff had been stolen. I became furious and went about looking for the criminal when I found they returned to the scene of the crime. It was two teenage girls. The blonde had been the mastermind, and I got her to confess by pinning her to the ground via holding her neck and waist down on the ground and I started trying to stretch her when she finally agreed to bring my stuff back. They left after showing me everything was back in my room when a pretty African American woman came to our place. She asked to speak with us in private, so my parents and I followed her outside. She told us that she worked for the government and they discovered that missiles were going to be launched at America wiping out half the population and we were in the spot that was going to be in the center of the explosion. She wouldn't say who was launching them, but she said our family had the option of buying tickets to a train that would take us to an underground bunker. We only had enough for 4 people and my dad agreed to stay behind. My parents went inside to start packing essentials while I looked up at the sky to see a solar eclipse. I became very frightened and shook my head then looked back up to see a normal moon in the sky, so I calmed down a little. I started packing my stuff, then went with my mom to put our things with my aunts because they said they'd let us put our stuff with theirs. I noticed that everyone in the complex was packing, but there wasn't a panic. It was a very intense calm, the air was heavy with fear. The sky started flashing red and my aunt told me it was practice for the people who had to stay behind, so they would know when to brace themselves. It was a very dark night even though the moon was full. As I finished packing, the speakers came on and said it was time to board the train. We got our stuff and filed down the ramps to the station. As we stood about to board, it finally sunk in that my dad wouldn't be coming. I could tell my family cared but they wouldn't show it. They stood on the train waiting for me, but I couldn't board. My dad and I don't have a close relationship and it's like this dream made me realize how much I cared. He insisted I get on and I finally did. As the train pulled away I couldn't take the pain and shouted "I love you!" With teary eyes. He shouted it back before he got out of ears reach and the train descended underground. This is where I woke up.

This dream was very emotional for me. I felt such an intense mixture of fear, pain, and anger that I was genuinely glad that it wasn't real when I woke up. Any help with interpretations are appreciated.

In my dream I was in the desert flying a helicopter. I destroyed a tank and then went underground with a friend. Suddenly, I saw people from my high school JROTC enter the building. I was making skeletons that were the size of action figures.

In my other dream, I was walking towards Belen. I notice instead of my shoes I had my boots on. It started to rain and I arrived at Amy's house. It was me, Amy, Kristy, and a young girl. Kristy looked smaller and skinnier than she actually is. It was a pretty big house and then suddenly we get the feeling that someone is going to come rob or kill us. We hide in a secret room behind a bookshelf. Kristy starts grabbing my penis and telling me she wants it. I'm like wtf? After, we hear stuff going on outside and the town is engulfed in flames. There's a huge monster attacking it. I go outside seeing if I can kill the monster but I can't find anything.

Dream
Notes

I was at work but in a barbershop. It was my Friday so I wasn't worried about overtime. Suddenly, I notice it's 8pm and an older woman tells me I'll be staying until 10. I get in my car and call Desirae but see her in the parking lot that looks like the one in Los Lunas High. I ask her if she's stalking me and we start talking. The woman shows up and I saw "You know it's my Friday, right?" she says, "Yeah well we're all working." I get out to go back to work and we see an airline plane. We hear that he won't make it to the runway behind us from that height. The airplane does a backspin but it fails and the plane crashes right after I exclaim that the pilot is an idiot. There is a huge explosion with fire and smoke everywhere around the crash site. I yell at Desirae to get the camera and I run into the bathroom to pee. I notice the toilet water is deep blue and start peeing. When I started peeing in my dream, I was also peeing in the waking world.

January 31, 2014

review: friend Q rampages the streets with a construction truck, nightmare

Construction Truck Rampage
I'm waiting on top of the hill for the light to turn green. The street dead-ends here so I have to turn either left or right and I definitely need to turn left.

This light is taking forever! As I wait, I watch a construction truck harass a man outside of his own home. The con. truck destroys his yard and nearly kills the man. What the hell is going on?

The con. truck leaves, going in the direction I need to go. Finally, the light turns green. I drive and make my turn. A gust of wind pushes my car, and just about everyone else on the street, backwards. It came from that same con. truck ahead. Crap! I should turn back!

He smashes up the cars that got too close! This guy is insane! Suddenly he jumps out of his con. truck and races towards me. I recognize his face as my friend Q. But here, he was no friend! Just some mad man!

The crowd is terrified of him, and runs!

My car disappears and I run down an alley, hoping I can hide from him. But he waits for me, pacing back and forth for me to come out. What do I do? As I run out the other end I dial up 911 on my cell phone. They take FOREVER to answer! The responder explains that she's the ONLY employee there. What? Are they cancelling 911?

I explain to her there's a mad man chasing me in a const. truck on evers and some other street I can't remember. "HURRY!" I hang up and run! Q continues to chase me in his con. truck, mauling everything along the way.

I run into a crowded mall, there's no way he can find me here! And there's no way he can maul down this mall!

I look behind me and there he is, psychotic eyes! Help me! I run from room to room to room to room. Eventually I crash a party being held at some fancy restaurant. I tell the server, "help! get the cops!" I call 911 again!

I hang out in the restaurant for awhile until it felt safe again. I didn't see him and hoped it meant officers were doing their job. Later I go to the supermarket and see him there. I quickly hide between isles 70 and 80 to get away from him. I woke up shortly after.

09-26-2013 -- [Very long, detailed, funny dream, that like usual, I can not remember well enough to really do justice to it. I literally woke chuckling to all the insanity I'd just been through.] I am at a hotel or something, almost certainly at or near Walt Disney World, and I am with Dale. He's on the last full day of his vacation, and is stressing out about going home the next day. He's worried about packing everything and getting the rental car returned and all.

So I am walking him through it all step-by-step, and telling him it will all go smoothly and be easy to get everything done, and he is starting to calm down. Meanwhile, we seem to be eating in a little restaurant or cafeteria that seems more like it is in a school than a hotel (hints of FCM at IWU), and Dale is mentioning how he ended up writing some sort of sarcastic bit for a small humor newsletter, but what was supposed to be one little bit has grown into three, and he's handed them to me to read, and as I am doing so (and nothing ever reads well in dreams) the publication is growing from a Teens Today-size 11x17 folded-into-four-page handout to a Hornet-sized newspaper to a multi-page, multi-section full-size newspaper like the Orange County Register, which I am having trouble folding to carry under my arm.

Meanwhile, Dale has just taken out his trombone and has walked into the back of a classroom and sat down with his instrument as a very no-nonsense teacher and a bunch of students start to walk into the room. It seems Dale is sitting in on a rehearsal. The teacher is very tough and demanding, but all Dale ever receives from him is the occasional brief nod, so he must be a very good musician. [In real life I am almost certain Dale doesn't play anything.]

As the teacher starts and continues to lead the group, I am very surprised to notice all the brass players are segregated behind a 'sound-proof' barrier that can't block the sound entirely, but lessens it, so the teacher isn't having to constantly warn the brass not to blare, and urge the woodwinds and strings to be louder, to be heard, and I am thinking to myself what a brilliant idea it is, and wishing we had it back when I was in band. But Dale is not behind it, so I guess the trombone is a woodwind in this dream.

Anyway, they play for a bit, and then they seem to take a little break, and while the professor is giving his students small bits of individual instruction, I am making a few comments (about the vacation, not the music) to Dale, and though I am afraid the music teacher will snap at me, he doesn't. The teacher is a sort of a mixture between Mr. Eubanks (one of my teachers, though not a band teacher), Pat Moran, and Lisa Simpson's music teacher.

Soon the whole class is moving, and it seems like we move about a corridor over. It is like we are moving from a practice room to a performance hall, and starting to prepare for an actual concert or something. But there are more and more people walking in and getting involved, and lots of 'guest stars,' both from TV and from my past. Tony Shalhoub seems to be puttering around, and Ron Howard seems to be playing an instrument, and wondering how things are going to play out, but they are both very young. (Ron is Happy Days age, and Tony resembles his character in Galaxy Quest.)

There is a young lady who is top of her class, and very proper, but kind of stuck up (a sort of cross between Sharon Newkirk's brilliance and Cordelia Chase's attitude) who is supposed to be one of the star performers, but she has managed to do something to anger the professor, and he just points her to an out-of-the-way corner and orders her to sit down and shut up, which has her pouting and angry.

Meanwhile, there is a very flashy and flamboyant piano player, a kind of a cross between Liberace and Elton John, very forward, demanding, and visual, who is just passing through, but sees a piano, and can't help but sit down and start to play, and the professor tolerates it, but makes it plain he expects him to behave, and amazingly enough, manages enough presence that the flamboyant player meekly agrees.

So they are all starting to tune up and prepare, and Dale is still hanging in the background, out of the way, but ready to play. Since he is not one of the students, he doesn't want to put himself forward at all, but he is still going to sit in and play along. Meanwhile, Shawn Spencer is also here, and is his usual insane self, and is coming up with all sorts of ideas on how to make the concert or opera or whatever it is supposed to be, and somehow the strict, demanding, controlling professor finds almost all of his insane ideas to be interesting, and is largely giving him free reign, and thereby allowing chaos to spread incredibly.

So the people are wandering in and out, music is played, Shawn is rewriting both the show and bits of music on the fly (at one point he walks by the piano player, throws in a hand, and adds a small riff mid-song before walking off) and though I expect both the flamboyant pianist and the controlling director to be furious, they seem much more bemused, almost sort of "Yes, that does work nicely."

The girl is complaining that she isn't being allowed to do anything, and it's just not right! Ron Howard is having fun, but confused as can be about what is happening, and Shawn is getting more and more wild in his ideas, which doesn't bother the controlling professor at all, though it certainly ought to! Things are getting more and more surreal, and the audience is just laughing hysterically and taking it all in. It is chaos ... brilliantly orchestrated chaos!

Finally things end and we all start filing out. I want to tell the professor how much I liked the concert, and also I still want to comment on that brass behind the barrier thing, but there is no way to get near him at the moment, and the press of the crowd more or less forces me into the practice room that we'd visited earlier. It seems that other students, not part of the group performing, but inspired by the concert's madness, have run rampant in here, and trashed the place.

The college staff have been working at cleaning the place up, and are somehow deciding to blame me for all this, but I am not having any part of it. I tell them they want the prestige of having this big name person in charge, and to keep him from walking off in a huff they give him complete and absolute control ... if he goes mad and his students destroy the place, the blame is completely theirs. They can't blame it on a random passing stranger! They don't like hearing this, and are swarming at me, trying to pull me down, but all they manage to do is to pull down all the materials blocking the door, and create an exit for me. I climb out of the room, and back into the main hall, where I find the crowds thinning.

I run into Dale, who I haven't seen in a while, and he is now late for his plane, but he feels the concert was well-worth it, and he isn't worried about it anymore. I start helping him grab all his luggage, and am sort of shrinking it to a small size, and causing it to all float around us (ala Harry Potter) while Kevin is complaining about everything, and saying he doesn't know what is going on.

We hurry toward the car, but as the crowds continue to thin, I practically run right in to the professor, and decide I have to speak to him for a moment. But now he is tired, and winding down, and has been talking to people for quite a while, and may be starting to second guess himself a little, and he seems really iffy about talking to me.

I tell him something like "That was crazy, and insane, and hilarious, and absolutely brilliant, but I have to tell you two things. The first is a quote from one of the Superman movies: 'You can't ...' I mean, 'You don't ...' 'If you think you can ....' Never mind. It's not important." Now he is starting to smirk, and seems to be getting to be in a better mood.

"The second thing is this. I used to be a music student ... never again!" I insist, worried that he'll think I want to ask him for lessons or something. Then I start to mention the constant warnings to the brass not to blare, and everybody else to be louder, but after the first couple of words, he is repeating back what I am saying, just a split second after me, then saying it with me, then saying is just an instant before me, like that odd monster out of the Doctor Who episode Midnight. Before I can get too frightened and freak too much, he breaks it off to make a comment about how the strange thing is, they don't have that segregated bit here in the performance hall, only in the practice room.

About this point, I woke up chuckling to myself about the madness of the dream.

9/17/2013, 10:05-5:55

Meditated last night. Same mantra as last time.

Dream 1:

I was on a battlefield as a soldier. I looked to the right and saw a destroyed building. There was the body of Hitler next to it, a piece of the building, and a crushed military tank. I also saw a fence in front of me with a trench. In the trench was a bipod-ed sniper rifle aimed at the building. Also, everything was on top of a sheet of ice.

I then recall being in a war room. Someone was pointing to a map of the world toward where Australia should be. There was ice on the map in place of the over-sized island. There was some everywhere on the map, actually. I guess it represented the world in an Ice Age. The guy pointing then pointed to Africa and said something about "them" being in Africa, but also in the "Home Depot" of the world, as he pointed to Asia. (WTH Asia is Home Depot?) The dream then ended.

Dream recall from today's naps.

Dream 1(fragments):

There was some anime with story about some detective dude who visited some school and was getting all clues by beating up people and in the end he found out that the teacher was behind everything and then there's some other character appeared.

Dream 2:

I am in my room, doing some stuff, and i spontaneously realize that i am dreaming, i take off a few headsets(seems to be my new reality check, multiplying headsets, haha) and then go towards balcony, i look around and it's different, more cramped than IWL and it's more structually into building. Suddenly dream fades out.
I wake up still dreaming, but can only see cloudy blackness, though still can feel that i am in my room. Dream is highly unstable. I get up from the bed and go in general direction of balcony, i hear familiar voice of attacker DC, as he gets in my way, i forcefully shove him off to the side and continue towards balcony while trying to force dream to stabilize with sheer will. As i reach balcony dream becomes stable and blackness fades, i rub hands and take off a few more headsets because why not, balcony seems to be pretty similar to before false awakening.
I jump, feel my wings and start flying. I fly to the left from the balcony and there are some yellow buildings, trees and some highways. After a bit of just flying i decide to try that idea of starting transformation from phantom sensations. I focus on them and it starts, i feel and see snout and also the side of nearest building becomes reflective, in reflection i see that my head is a head of dragon now, black/grey scales and a few horns, but as i try to move, it reverts back. I fly over some fence and there's some passage under bridge. I land and decide to go through it, there are some DCs.
I exit passage and now i am in some foggy park place(As in, natural fog), with trees and a puddle of water to the right, i take off once again with my wings and i fly higher, out of the fog. I look around and there are some tall red brick buildings surrounding the park, i fly higher and get onto the roof of one, then i continue flight. As i fly i notice that one of buildings has small weird HP bar near the roof, i get onto it and stomp a few times, with each stomp taking out part of hp bar, as it reaches 0% building falls apart in the place, then i continue flight and notice more buildings with hp bars and part of their hp missing, they look actually damaged. As i fly over one, i hear some voice saying something and then some force knocks me to the right, i fall onto the streets, but manage to land perfectly. I look around and see some buildings on fire and some factory building. I walk and lose lucidity, i walk through some streets and reach some gas station.
I wake up and i am apparently in some outdoor restaurant place and my tagbook is on the floor, some weird kid is looking at it. I grab whole thing and kid says that he knows me from dreamviews apparently. We start talking about something and then he asks if he can have some of candies that i apparently have in the pocket, there's four of them. I give him one and eat one myself as well, it's yummy.

Dream recall from today's naps.

Nap #1(fragment):

At some point in dream i was in my room and i was standing and staring at the wall. I spontaneously realize that i am dreaming, some weird voice keeps repeating word "Nila", and i can't move for some reason. Shortly dream fades to black before i can do anything. Voice still repeating that word and i try to visualize some other place but shortly i feel somebody's hands on my shoulders. Some other voice starts saying something along the lines "You will wake up, you will wake up right now"( ), i say "No" while still trying to change location and move, but shortly i indeed wake up.

Nap #2(fragments):

I was at home and there was something weird happening. I was busy in the bathroom, but some family member was interrupting and annoying me. Then everyone left and i was looking in the window. At the street, somebody was driving huge truck like crazy, ramming everything and causing total destruction. I decided to go outside and check it out. He did managed to crash the truck to the point of it not working, but even after that he was never giving up and was still trying to destroy everything by throwing some heavy objects. There were also alot of construction workers around trying to repair everything. Then building and nearby trees were set on fire and burned out.