All DJ Entries

Date: September 24, 2013
Technique: MILD & WBTB (hoping to DILD...didn't happen)
Fraggle=Fragment

Fraggle

Something about Diana Ross...I was at her concert and I was singing her songs

Ridiculous.

Date: 16th Sept

Pre bed: 3mg mel

WBTB: 26 mg caffeine (capp.)

Comment: post 1/2 for 16th of Sept. Way behind with updating, trying to keep these post as efficient as possible.

Micro-ld: In my first room, at some point in the dream, I make a call to this woman in the administration and discuss some things with her.

I am in the room and moving in a strange manner, float gliding on the floor and know that this is a dream. I keep on moving around like this but then see the B6 bitch and for some reason assume that she is real. I get totally distracted by what she says and lose 99 percent of my lucidity. We start fighting, bitting and scratching each other. While we are fighting, I keep contemplating, how could I know that this is a dream, she looks so much like her real self.

LD1: I find myself on the street of my hometown and happily remark that this is a dream. I see this guy I know and his friends and think about a song I want to make them sing. I make a few movements with my hands to control the guys like a conductor and get some results but when I listen more closely, they seem to talk more than sing and are slightly out of sync. Then from somewhere I can hear the Manu Chao song (which is a mix of many similar songs) play loudly from somewhere. The sound is absolutely fantastic and I am thinking about how cool listening to a song like this in a dream is. I can hold my concentration on the music for a while and then it stops. I see my friend, still euphoric I greet her and think about interacting with her, but then decide to leave the memory of her alone. I feel the dream is fading.

A classmate of mine appears and I decide to hold on to him for stabilization. I embrace him. He is wearing a T-shirt similar to that of bf. He puts his hands around my waist and then moves one hand to my butt. I feel that this may quickly escalate to something else as I have a moment of sexy feelings. I look at his face, his lips. But no! I have been thinking about this lately (very annoyed with myself), so no! We are just hugging, I concentrate on that and make the sexy feeling go away. I still enjoy the moment, it is like as if we are about to dance to this soft music that I can almost hear at the background. Then I feel a drop of water on my hand and look around to see that it is starting to rain. Absolutely amazing effect, I think to myself. I am still in the same position, in his embrace, pretending to be stabilizing and examine his well shaped arm, notice his tan and the (sorry guys) flawless soft golden hairs. And as if taking in all this detail isn't enough, I can suddenly see his chest expanding and it dawns on me that he is breathing like a normal person. I find his breathing extremely fascinating, due to the fact that this is a dream, and also as I ponder how my subcon has created so much life like detail this time. I must be really immersed in the dream, I think to myself.

Unfortunately, I am taking too much time in this state of awe and feel the dream starts to fade again. I remember I wanted to make a call and look around. There is another DC to my left, similar to another classmate. I also think about my classmate who's holding me. These DCs must have a phone with them. But before I can do anything else the dream totally fades and I wake up.

This LD was the second of two from the morning of 9/17/2013.

Color legend: Non-dream Dream Lucid

Lucid #148: Musical Travels

I have a false awakening early morning on a couch in a room that looks like a basement. Wife's sitting nearby. I'm unhappy to get up but there's something I need to be doing, so I follow her out into the hallway of an office building. Through the windows I see that it's still dark out. Some guy with glasses and a shaved head is dressed for work and waves toward the parking lot at someone I can't see. I wonder how he's in such a good mood so early.

Wife convinces me that there's something I need to look for in the bathroom, so I go to find it. I walk down a long corridor and take a right through a narrow hallway filled with people. As I'm pushing my way through the crowd I sort of knock this one guy to the ground. Rather than apologize, I hurry away, hoping he didn't see me do it. (Not nice at all, I know...)

Once inside the bathroom, I forget what I was looking for, so I wander out another door back into the hallway. There's a folksy country duet playing over unseen speakers, an older man and woman singing sweetly about the life and love they've shared. I think how cool it would be if dreams could produce music like this... and a wave of suspicion makes me hit the nose pinch RC and I'm lucid.

I continue down the hallway to a fat guy standing behind a small desk that's stacked with literature. One of his hands is resting on the papers and I grab onto it, trying to bring extra vividness into the scene. He looks horrified by this and when I think about it a bit more, I don't feel too great about it myself, either. "Sorry about that," I say, continuing down the hall. I think about what I intended to do with this dream and remember the Task of the Month about going into the girls' locker room.

I follow several twists and turns in the hallway, each one leaving the hallways narrower than the last, all the while expecting that the next turn will lead me to the girls' locker room. Finally, I step through a door at the end of the hallway into a room that looks like some kind of really nicely-furnished barracks or dormitory. A double stairway encircles an elegant fountain and leads up to a room that stretches far into the distance, either wall lined with beds. There's a huge number of DCs here, all female, many of them in the beds and some just walking around.

I try to verbally insist that this is a women's locker room rather than a big dormitory, but somehow I get the idea to sing my intent. As I do this, the whole thing turns into this huge musical number that both me and the women in the dormitory are singing at the same time. It was sort of 80s-sounding, but an original song. If I had to pick a song, it was probably closest to Bonnie Tyler's "I Need a Hero". The whole thing was pretty awesome.

Most of the DCs are dancing while all of this is going on, with a few of them even doing these fancy handsprings over the beds. I can't remember many of the lines, but one of them was definitely something like

"It's the girls' locker room,
Where the lockers have bras and socks and stuff!"

I know that this isn't the locker room and as cool as this musical performance is, I still want to try to pull off a task. There's a cinderblock wall behind me, and I phase through it, winding up in the void. I rub my hands together then try to feel my way forward. There's someone else here with me in this void, a female presence. Rather than speaking, she begins to softly sing. Her voice is beautiful and echoes everywhere around me. She says something like, "I can only take this journey with you if you <something something...??>" (What was it? Wish I could remember this!)

In a moment I feel my body settling onto some soft dirt. I'm laying on my back and the singer, a woman in her mid-to-late twenties is also lying in the dirt a few feet away. Her ethnicity is difficult to guess but I feel like she might be some combination of Asian and Hispanic. We're in some kind of construction site near an unfinished building. To her right, maybe twenty feet away is a chain-link fence. Past that I see a spotlight glaring at us and lighting the area where we've landed. She starts to get to her feet and as I follow her lead, the dream ends.

1. I walk up to a big light-brown bag and scare the shit out of the people in it. Similar to this in size (but still bigger).

Apparently it’s a vehicle. I had gathered a sack of BL manga to read while in the ‘vehicle’. They were bigger and heavier than normal. I sit them on the floor inside the door. Melly is there and shows me some candy she brought. Twizzlers was one. I brought some too and lay them out. One was really long multicolored Twizzlers (red and green), one was small twist Twizzlers. The multicolored ones were half and half and the red and green blended into each other in the middle where they met, and they were almost translucent.

We’re waiting for a horror movie villain (think Michael Myers). I see in my head like a movie scene the figure standing on the road. He’s walking funny as if injured, and I see a car pass by him as if they’d run into him.

Inspiration: I got a bag of Twizzers a couple of days ago. Horror movie thing probably inspired by Friday 13th.

2. I hold my breath as a vehicle with a bad guy in it passes me by. The lady inside with blond-hair just past her ears smirks at me. I remember her, she’s a woman ‘I’ helped in a hospital when I was a doctor and some crisis was happening. She fell down the stairs and I rushed down to help her while everyone else was just trying to get away. “Look at me.” I urged her, checking to see if she had a head injury. Her hair was longer and in a pony then.

She turned out to be a stalker.

3. In a school (TTU)? Brought Sarah clothes, she was feeling down about something so we didn’t think she’d join in on what was going on (others were wearing them too). But she appears wearing jeans and a purple sweater with writing on it. We’re happy and walk out of the building, me quietly singing a song.

Mom is already getting in the car when we step out, and I burst into song, ‘Reflection’ from Mulan. Sarah stares. As we get in the car, she compliments me and says she gives the performance a four. I say something about how I love to sing when the weather is like that (‘windy’).

“Who is that girl I see
staring straight back at me
when will my reflection
show who I am inside?”

(I sing the last world as I get into the car.)

4. As I was getting up for the day, I saw my mini flashlight by the laptop and remembered something that happened. At some point during the night, I crawled across the bed and over to my desk, scrabbling around on it until I found the flashlight. By then, I realized that I had dreamed that there was a big spider in my bed. By then I already had the flashlight so I checked for ease of mind. x_x

It’s really weird when I react to something in a dream in WL. I think last time this happened, I walked over and got a sweater from somewhere, put it up on my bed with me and went back to sleep, lol. No wait, I think the last time was me coming to to find myself standing up on my bed…

Notes: Woke up half an hour early again. Two songs with dreams, seems like listening to music before bed might be the cause. :3 Also, one of my dream goals I’m trying to remember for if I go lucid is to sing a song (not ‘Reflection’ though!). I can’t do that IWL because we live in an apartment and I have a high voice.

It's very dark out and I'm on some kind of giant swing. It's slowly swinging me back and forth in front of a large stage. I'm holding a plate of cake and will be singing a young girl, G, happy birthday. I clear my throat and begin singing. When the song is over, the swing has slowed and stopped right by G; I hand her the plate of cake. I am now asking an unknown girl if I sounded 50's enough. I see a friend, D, singing alone on the stage.
Now, I find myself standing on a regular sized swing. I think it is still outdoors- it is dark. The unknown girl is here, standing behind me on the swing, with her arms wrapped around my waist. We move to get swinging and some love song plays in the background. We're swinging pretty high and when we reach the highest point we can, I look down. I see the night sky with all its stars. "I'm above the stars!" I exclaim joyfully, but it is only a reflection. D is also here and he tells us to climb the swing; we do. At the top, we sit down and hook some harnessing device to our pants. I look into the distance and see into a restaurant. An old man sits alone at a table in the middle with a bowl of soup. When I look back, he has choked and is laying on the ground, facedown.

Late Journal Entry: June 6, 2013
No Method (long day at work, just went to bed)

Piece's of a dream #1:
Living in Columbus Ohio for a short while with my sister then it was time to go back to my life in another state. I have to make a decision on if I was ready to move to my state, or stay in Columbus and live closer to my family.

#2:
Inside a school cafeteria eating lunch and my son was singing and I told him to be quiet because he could not sing.

Napping:
I was baby sitting and showing new mothers how to bath their newborn babies. They were very nervous and I could hear their heart beating so loud and fast. Many of them could not be in the same room and had to step out for several parts of the demonstration.

Hey guys! I managed to have three vivid dreams last night, and while they were all quite short I was proud that I can now remember three, when I could barely remember one just 6 days ago! None were lucid, however .

Why am I wearing a Towel/ Dog-Llama

In my first dream, I was with a cute girl from one of my friend groups, dressed in nothing but towels. We were walking outside on a bright winter day. I could't feel the cold, and this should have tipped me off that it was a dream, but alas it did not. As we came around a bend, my family stood on the snowy sidewalk, all letting their dogs play. I had never seen these dogs before, but it seemed to make sense that they all had at least two dogs. It was my father, step mother, two pairs of aunts and uncles, and my grand parents - all having a grand time. Upon closer inspection, I find that one of my grandmother's dogs are really strange looking. Upon waking I will realize that it looked like a strange dog because it was a llama. Come ON dream me! Get your shit together!

The girl I was with played with the dogs for a while, then declared that we needed to get one. For some reason there was a Mac home PC on a pedastal outside, so I decided to show her how cute Husky-Lab mixes are. I remember her smiling, and her eyes being incredibly blue. Like really blue... And as I started to get certain feelings *cough* my dream faded out.

Crazy

When the dream fades back in I'm on my back in a high-school art room, laying on a table. The girl I was just with is standing near my knees, and we finally have clothes on, (though I'll come to find my fly down after a few minutes... sigh). There are a bunch of science projects set up, however I begin to sing Gnarles Barkley's "Crazy", and everyone joins in. I sing it REALLY well (I'm a singer IWL, but I was hitting crazy high notes), and it was a blast. Everyone knew their part and we threw down an incredible acapella (a full song with just voices) remix of it... Pretty sure this dream came from my girlfriend forcing me to watch Pitch Perfect.

After its over we all go back to our stations, and some kid explains to me how there is enough grease in most human hair that you could condense it and turn it into edible spam. Vom.

Fragment: Call of Duty

Two little twelve-year-olds discuss Call of Duty, and it turns out that the blonde one that looks like a punky future Skin-Head is ranked 50 something-ith in the world. I grab a controller and as I stare at the TV I become the soldier I'm controlling. Evidently this is normal, as I don't panic. Right off the bat I start totally destroying the enemy, who are dressed in black combat gear with black gas masks. Its in a sunny, open area just outside of a modern, expensive house and a really nice modern garage with cool cars. I end up killing 15 of them before I slowly wake up.


Quite a busy dream night, and really clear recall! I am dissapointed that I still haven't had a lucid, but I know that I first have to have lots of vivid dreams so I can find my dream signs. Not worried! I seem to come very close to realizing I'm dreaming every dream too, so I have hope. Tonight I will try a WILD around 4 AM.

I'm not usually one to sing around people, at least not on my own, so when I found myself in the middle of a 7-11 singing along with the overhead music I became lucid. It's not uncommon for me to have music in my dream or sing inside my mind while in the grocery store but this is a new treat for me in a lucid dream and I go with it.

The song I'm singing is All-Star by Smash Mouth, not my first choice for a musical number but apparently easy to remember. As I begin singing I start walking around the aisle, checking out my control and it occurs to me that I should make the most of this neat scene. I have always wanted a musical number in my dream and now I have one.

As I finish the first stanza I slightly raise my arms and the dozen-plus people in the store all stop in place, shopping baskets in hand, and begin singing the chorus. It sounds really cool and I'm totally digging on making this happen.

"All that glitters is goooolllddd! Only shootings stars break the mold!"

I continue singing and I'm even impressed I can recall the words so easily. the novelty of singing in a dream isn't wearing off though I find I'm not so keen on my voice as the solo participant. Still, I keep singing as I slowly walk among the stock-still shoppers.

"It's a cold place, and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now, wait 'til you get older
But the media-men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the satellite picture."

"The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The water's getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire, how 'bout yours?
That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored."

And again the people erupt into song and I'm thankful to blend in with the harmony.

"Hey now, you're a rock-star
Get the show on, get paid..."

I don't know any of these people but it's funny watching them standing there like an awkward music video.

"All that glitters is gooolllddd!"

As they sing this part they raise their arms in the air and wiggle their fingers for emphasis. I can't help but smile. :)

"Only shooting stars break the mo-o-ollld!"

The song ends and I'm slightly glad the pressure is off. My throat feels dry and scratchy and I wake up, still smiling and feeling happy.

I'm an All-Star! :D

I'm in Grandma's kitchen and looking out the window at the night sky. After a few minutes, the sky starts spinning and changing. When it stops, I'm amazed at the sight. The sky is brighter and more colorful. It reminds me of the Northern Lights, but a million times better. I run to grab my phone so that I can take a picture. I'm about to take a picture when a massive, rainbow marbled planet appears. It's beautiful. I snap a picture. Suddenly, I'm transported to a desolate place, like ruins in a desert. I get a bad feeling and I know something terrible has happened. Then out of nowhere, an army of faceless soldiers march toward me.

Dream Fragment: A school councilor is telling me that keeping a container of onions is good and will wake me up. A small container of onions appears and starts singing, "I'm full of onions, please keep me near. I bet you won't let me kick you in the rear."

second dream this week involving singing. i realised that in a dream/dream memory that i had been in a spoof version of TOTP singing some joke songs with a few old mates. it took me a while to figure out if this had actually happened but i felt so awake that when i saw a replay of it i was sure it was real. we had been called in last minute to do the song and despite not having any guidance as to the nature of the show had done a silly song in a serious manner. it was rubbish but i was really excited to see how it had gone and just see us all on telly. we gathered down the road at some old friends house to watch it, but didn't tell everyone that we were on. she seemed really whacky, almost out of it for some reason.

we watched the first few songs then it finally dawned on me that our song was probably so rubbish that they would have cut it from the end of the program. it was replaced with one my mate who is actually a singer had done for the next weeks show. it didnt fit the spoof nature of the program but was actually a really good rock song with him on guitar in the video on his own in some kind of escher staircase type video. he turned up at the house and despite being annoyed at not getting to see our song, i was chuffed for him that he had done such a good performance on telly. i tried to find the producers who were right annoying media types and they just tried to cause friction between me and my mate while i was just trying to find out if there was a copy i could watch somewhere. what i was mostly looking forward to was the spoof banter before the performance with some guy who was like tommy lee. then i realised i had a mouthful of stuff like previous recurring dreams, and i tried to pull it all out into a sink. people thought i was being sick, but i just had this mass of vegetable matter stuck in my throat. maybe just a sign of eating a bit much?

01-06-2013 -- [What fragments I had earlier in the night didn't seem worth remembering, but I know there was something about mom being around, and dad being dead, stuff at the Church of the Nazarene, and something about Anne and I being friendly with each other. I don't get why she is in my dreams so much, recently. I haven't seen her in years, haven't thought about her except in my dreams, and have no desire to have anything to do with her anymore. But the last few nights she keeps popping into my dreams.]

I find myself at college, sitting for finals on two classes that I have never once attended through the year. This is my last chance to do something which might be able to salvage my grades. I think one class is a civics class, and the other may be a math class.

Anyway, for the Civics final, I have to write a paper on what I would consider the perfect form of government, if money were no issue. I know what my beliefs are on government, and I think this ought to be easy, but every time I am about to write something, I think of more things to consider.

I am planning on writing something in favor of a Rand-ist, Objectivism pro-business government and system, which is what I believe in, both in my dreams, and in real life, but I also keep coming back to the issue of big corporations with CEOs who make billions while they try to pay their workers minimum wage (or less), and while the system allows this, it still isn't right.

[This could lead to a big argument on how no government system could ever work, because people quite simply suck! Communism is a good system in theory but can't work in practice because of human nature. Some are going to take charge and abuse the system while making others do all the work. Capitalism is the best system, but still the exact same thing happens. Our current liberal system with all the welfare and things fails for the same reasons, and in the same way as communism. All systems fail, and for the same reasons. Humans suck! So ends the soap box.]

By this time, three fourths of the testing period is over, and I still haven't written anything, and the teacher is trying to talk me into just giving up, taking an F for the class, and leaving. But I am still convinced I can write something good enough to salvage my grade. Meanwhile, time keeps passing, and I think I am now in the middle of the testing period for the second class, still trying to write the paper for the first class.

In some odd was that makes no sense, I soon find myself picking up and throwing down either a bust, or a broken bit of statue, again and again. I am kind of doing weight lifting with it, and must have been doing so for a while, because I have really built up my strength and stamina, and have some pretty serious muscles.

Then I find myself in what seems to be a bar, but I am with the choir, and they are doing a concert. I haven't been around for rehearsals, and am not a part of it, but as they start singing, I find it is all Gaither songs, and I can't help but sing along. We're now several songs in, and one has just finished, and somebody is on a bar stool next to me. I think it is Laura S., and she leans to me and very nastily tells me to either quit singing, or get out! Even though I've been singing great because I know all the Gaither songs perfectly. [Don't think I have ever exchanged a cross word with her, no idea where this dream bit came from.]

Without a word, I bend to pick up my backpack, and start to leave. She calls after me that Carl has things to do, so can't give me a ride home, and something about being ready on time on Sunday if I want a ride to church? She didn't think so! And I really don't have a clue why she is upset with me, but I must not have a car, currently, from all she is saying.

I walk out of the church, and it turns out to be the church in Buena Park, and I start to walk home. It's only a couple of miles, not all that far. I pass through Servant's Heart, where they are talking about one of the people now constantly visiting or living at Rosemary's (the tall guy with curly black hair) and they are saying something about how they gave him some money and he went out and got sloshed on it ... never again money for him.

By this point, I have walked through the flower neighborhood down to Dale, and have reached La Palma, and am preparing to jaywalk across to Food King, but the traffic is really heavy. Right about when I am going to bolt across, a car pulls up. It has nothing to do with me, but since I know the person, I stop and say hi. It is Tracey M (also from choir) who is either picking up or dropping off somebody.

Soon I make it across the street, and soon make it home to the Hickory house, where I head into the house and move to my first bedroom, where I plan to go to sleep. I am remembering just a tiny bit about whatever the earlier bit here at the Hickory house was about, and how at least dad wasn't alive in the dream, so it is catching up with reality. Meanwhile, there is a cat in my room, and I am trying to pet it, but it seems to be a stray, so it is skittish, probably has fleas, and it isn't one I know.

[When my dad died, I kept having weird dreams that he came back to help me with my mom's death. Once mom died too, then either parent might show up in my dreams, dead, alive, as a ghost, as having faked their own death, or back in time, before they died, so none of the above applied. Oddly, by the end of this dream I was a little kid, so they would have both been alive, yet I was glad my dreams were catching up enough to remember dad was dead.]

01-02-2013 -- This one seems to start almost as a gas station mystery shop. I am at the pumps at a gas station, getting ready to maybe pump some gas, and also looking around at outside displays, thinking to maybe get some oil. I suddenly realize I brought oil with me, and it is already mine, even as I am pulling it off the display, and am hoping I don't get in trouble for using my own oil, because it sure doesn't look right, the way it is going down.

Soon I stumble into a sort of meeting of an organization that seems to be kind of a get-rich-quick thing. You know ... the various real estate gurus who advertise buying property with no money down and making a fortune. There is a sort of feeling of some kind of scam going on, and though no characters appear, there is a strong feeling of something connected to Psych. The guy leading things seems to be Alexandre O., a pastor I knew from my days at Hosanna Printing.

My cell phone rings, and I am asked to turn it off, as they want no recording of the meeting. My phone quickly turns into a small hand-held cassette recorder, and though I try to turn it off, the wheels keep turning and the tape keeps moving, so I think it is still recording. They don't think it is a problem, though, since that is what everybody else's recorders are doing. (Just how many people are recording this thing when they aren't supposed to?)

It is a longish meeting, and there is a lot going on. It goes on for quite a while, but not in any detail I can put down here, except in a few small scenes. At one point they give a small, meek, slightly Oriental girl (think Amy from Futurama) a lot of money, several thousands of dollars that they collected from the rest of us at the meeting, and she is insisting that it is too much. The guy in charge interrupts her, and demands she tell us her name, and this shy girl who has barely spoken to us, and has identified herself as Amy in a whisper speaks out loud and clear, and gives her full name in a forceful manner. His point? Money has a large effect on a person's self confidence.

They bring a pizza in, and ask me to try the first piece, and I could swear it was the pizza that was made in my last dream (see Harry Potter, Voldemort, and the Pizza). It looks like the pizza from Aldi's, as it did, and is also fairly mangled. At one place, the crust has bubbled up, but instead of just a bubble in the crust, it bulges up and almost looks like a small planet on a column rising up from the crust, and I am really not sure about eating it.

Soon the meeting has been thinning out, and I have been asked to do something to show some sort of talent or skill that I will use to make something of myself. I grab a rather basic and simple guitar and start to try and play it (rather badly, as I have no idea how to play the guitar) and one of the other people takes it away from me. They somehow kind of unfold it into a much larger string instrument like a bull fiddle or something, and start to play amazingly on it.

I am embarrassed, but I start to sing along as they play. I have a lovely voice, and sing really well, but very softly because of my throat. [I have had no voice for about five years.] Soon we have moved away from the hotel we were in for this meeting, and Alexandre has turned into what almost looks like Peter David, and I find myself actually kind of whining about how I'm not actually good enough at anything, as we are trying to cross a really busy street to get back to the hotel.

The street crossing was fairly realistic, except for trying to dodge into too small of gaps in the traffic, when we can see much larger gaps a few seconds away, and would have just waited for them in real life. As we finish running across the street, Peter David has turned into Dale, and he has accidentally run behind a fence which separates the street from the sidewalk, so he has to back-track to get around the fence. I expect to beat him to the hotel because of this, but he still gets there first.

We head inside, and I note in passing that it is a nice hotel, but when I push the button for the elevator, and the doors slide open, they don't open onto an actual elevator, but onto a hallway containing the elevators. Weird. I glance at our room number, which is something like 5641 or some such, and hit the button for floor five, but that's not where we want to go. The rooms are not numbered by floor, but sequentially, and we have to read a sort of chart to figure out which floor our room is on.

12-26-2012 -- [This one is interesting to me mostly because of just how much it is all over the place. It goes anywhere and everywhere ... heck of a lot of different scenes for one little dream. Unfortunately as so often, the first part is mostly gone.]

Starts out with a combination of military stuff and Harry Potter bits. I am Harry Potter, fighting off Voldemort with the help of the military. There are bits of military police, chases, guns, and faking my death, while trying to gather weapons to aid with the fighting. Lots of chasing, and some long, neat scenes that are almost entirely gone, unfortunately. And all taking part in what is turning into Boisseranc Park.

Soon I find we are exiting the park on the center road [in real life, there is only one road into the park, on the 'west' side of the property, but the road we're on is one that doesn't exist about midway between the real road and the handball courts.] As we're exiting, we have to pass through a security check point, and I am hoping the guns we have on our persons are hidden well enough to not trigger all the alarms and things. But we go through without problems.

We're in mom's green car [mom never had a green car, nor have I], just about to pass a building and turn out on the road, and mom points it out and mentions that it is Fred and George's new building, and I just lose it. For the last ten days she has pointed this out each time we drive by it [never mind this is the first time I've dreamed this] and I'm tired of it, so I get really insulting and snippy. Really obnoxious, and I feel kind of bad about it even in the dream.

Soon we're in Smith's Food King, doing some shopping, and after how I blew up, I'm afraid to try and add anything to the shopping cart because I think she is still angry at me ... but I can't resist it when I come across a couple of packages of Sanderson Farms chickens wings at .49 cents a pound, and a BOGO deal. Somebody else is commenting on it to me in an insulting way, but I just tell them it is a really good deal, and I am jumping on it!

Soon I am somewhere, probably in Florida, cooking up the wings, and there is no mom here, anymore. I am now an adult, and mom has turned into an attractive young lady who is either a partner or girlfriend. I am deep frying the wings in a fryer, and our boss comes by and is making a lot of comments about not over-cooking the chicken, so I cook it a lot less than I normally would. When I take them out of the fryer, the gal with me carries them over to our bosses car, which seems to be on a stakeout. We soon see them cooking the wings in the car, and griping about their joke backfiring. It seems they told us to cook them less as a joke, not realizing we were going to give the wings to them.

Soon we're walking along a chain-link fence, talking about the national economy, job market, politics, and how it all affects local crime, as I find myself approaching a kind of strip mall with a lot of storefronts in it, and a slight curve to the property. I am walking toward one that seems to be a Doctors office on the side, almost at closing time. There seem to be three other people walking up at the same time, and I am hoping that isn't going to mean I need to wait forever.

Thankfully the wait isn't too long, and I soon find myself buying either some real estate, or a cell phone, I'm not really sure which. They have a long contract which I am going through and reading, and there are several lines where I need to sign, some where I need to initial, and some where I need to enter in a property address or cellular number or something. But I am being given the contract and am supposed to take it home to fill in the last bit, before turning it in.

Soon I find myself at a cross between a restaurant and a nightclub being taught to sing by Mark and Luralee, in a setting that is slightly Karaoke-like, but really more profession. They are singing parts of songs, and expecting me to take over for other parts, and when I reach just the right point, I am belting out the last few lines as well, and as powerfully as Luralee used to do at Preston's. I am amazed, and figure I must have gotten over my voice problem! [Actually, I don't think Luralee sang that one. I think that one was one that Claudia did, later.]

Started off,in a grocery store, I was looking for a job... I had to dress up like Dolly Parton and work inside of a small box with a peep hole.Across from me was a young teen/20 girl with brown hair who was supposed to pretend to be Loretta Lynn, she gave me a business card out of the bust of her dress and said i should call this person (for what i don't know).

Dream changed and I'm outside with this giant (about turkey sized) looking green bird. Green bird had a flat face like an owl, but it was not round, was elongated, beak was yellow, tongue was black, feathers were sleek. Along comes this big black woman with a knife, and she pokes the birds eyes out first, bird doesn't respond. so she cuts out its tongue, still doesn't respond. so she cuts off its beak. this was where i had to turn my head, and when i turned back the entire face of the bird was gone. it was flapping around scared to death, still alive with basically no head.

made in heaven,queen - woke up with that in my head.

so to help me figure this dream out, the lyrics:

I'm taking my ride with destiny
Willing to play my part
Living with painful memories
Loving with all my heart

Made in heaven, made in heaven
It was all ment to be, yeah
Made in heaven, made in heaven
That's what they say
Can't you see
Oh I know, I know, I know that it's true
Yes it's really ment to be
Deep in my heart

I'm having to learn to pay the price
They're turning me upside down
Waiting for possibilities
Don't see too many around

Made in heaven, made in heaven
It's for all to see
Made in heaven, made in heaven
That's what everybody says
Everybody says to me
It was really ment to be
Yeah, yeah

When stormy weather comes around
It was made in heaven
When sunny skies break through behin the clouds
I wish it could last forever, yeah
Wish it could last forever, forever

I'm playing my role in history
Looking to find my goal
Taking in all this misery
But giving in all my soul

Made in heaven, made in heaven
It was all ment to be, yeah
Made in heaven, made in heaven
That's what everybody says
Wait and see, it was really ment to be
So plain to see
Yeah, everybody, everybody, everybody tells me so
Yes it was plain to see, yes it was ment to be
Written in the stars...
Written in the stars...

My mind has to completely unfuck this one. Scuse my french but....day-um,this was bad to be in this dream and watch that. IRL, today I go to be fingerprinted for a job. The whole thing with the bird, slowly just about decapitated (yuck), thats got to be about self expression, mine and my partners fears - of the throat chakra opening up (in my case)/not being strong enough the way he remembers it being years ago (in his case). We did some more recording last night before bed. Sounded shitty. I need to sit closer to the mic, because for some reason this thing picks up great peripheral sound but not so great when your in front of it more than a foot away. You know what though, you only live once. And we're getting older. We're in our forties. If we miss this chance, I doubt it will come again. I just want to get these two albums out there, and perform at some blue grass festivals and maybe a few open mic nights at the shack down the road. Get my womanly, curvy self up there and show those young skinny kids who havent had time to have a past yet, how to do it... I think a good recipe for singing is,take a lifetime of pain, a heart full of love - that was missed for half a lifetime and reunited two years ago, the best memories of motherhood - and wrap it up with a fever.

December 5, 2012

I did a WBTB this morning and had a lucid dream where I completed the two basic Tasks of the Month.

Dream:

I don't remember what I was doing when I became lucid. I remember I had been with this little girl. She had shown me her bedroom and I noticed there was a dripping sink there. I tried to turn it off, but instead made the drip much worse. I told the girl that she needed to find her mom to see if there was a trick to fixing it. I also remember the little girl showing me the teeth she had lost.

Suddenly I was lucid. The first thing that came to my mind was that I wanted to do some of the Tasks of the Month. I was pretty sure the "snow" and "singing" ones would be pretty simple. I was inside a building and I decided to fly out and make it snow. As I flew out the window I found that I was about six stories up. The city I was in looked old. The buildings were brick and aging, but nice in the way that a lot of old buildings were.

The sky was dark gray, and I could see the first few flurries of snow blowing in the wind. I was pleased that it was happening already. I willed it to snow harder. Soon the flakes were coming down more uniformly, but still blowing in the wind. What I really wanted was for the snow to start landing on the ground and other things around me. I needed to speed this up. So as I flew, I tried to make the passage of time move more quickly.

I then noticed the snow building up on some of the tree branches and against the curbs where it had blown. I continued to fly. The snow was starting to cover everything now. I saw a thick layer of snow on a tree branch in front of me. I reached out and scooped it up as I passed. I took a big bite of it. I could feel the texture of the snow, but it wasn't as cold as real snow. I felt a little disappointed.

By now the sky was really dark. I couldn't see the sun. I wasn't sure if it had gone down or if it was just that stormy. I decided to do the task of Singing a Christmas Carol. Before I had gone to sleep I had thought about the different caroles that i knew and wanted to do something interesting. But now at this time I decided on the easiest one I knew....Jingle Bells.

Jeff was suddenly standing by me. I told him to song with me. " Dashing through the snow.....In a one-horse open sleigh....."

I didn't stick around to see if he would sing with me. I took off flying again as I sang. I noticed that it was no harder to sing the song in my lucid dream than it would have been in real life. I had wondered if it would have been different in any way. But it wasn't. I finished the carol and started thinking about the next Task I wanted to do. I wanted to see the Northern Lights.

I looked around and noticed that I had somehow gotten inside of a building. The area I was in was very large--like a huge indoor mall. I flew around looking for an exit. But I wasn't finding any. I was frustrated. I shouldn't be having a problem like this. I was better than this. I knew that if I believed that I could go through the walls and be outside. I touched a wall. It felt so solid, but i knew that I had control over this. I backed away and prepared to fly through the wall....when my alarm went off.

I pushed "snooze" and tried to will myself back into the dream. Nothing was happening. Then suddenly I got this very vivid image of a gray kitten with an orange tabby face looking through a window right at me. It startled me, and I was fully wake again. And at this point I knew that I didn't have time to go back to sleep again.