false awakening

LEGEND:
Black = non-lucid
Grey = awake
Blue = lucid

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Lucid fragment
I reality check and get lucid, but either don't remember what came after it or the dream faded.

Great false awakening lucid!
Discouraged from my failed lucid that I just woke up from, I decide to do an especially aware reality check and then go to sleep with the mantra "When I see my hands I will remember I am dreaming and I will remember my body isn't real." The last part of the mantra is to make me more lucid and aware, so that I'm not just a zombie.

I then heard a noise my father made (maybe be dropped something) and got startled by it, and was disappointed. But I did a reality check, and, to my surprise, I breathed right through my plugged nose and was in a lucid dream. I immediately stood up and decided to leave my home. I tried looking away and back, imagining there'd be a door. I wanted to go to a specific place, but I ended up going into a mall. For some reason I suddenly had a VR headset on my head and my lucidity slipped a bit and things started getting unclear, both since that's something that happens if you don't have your VR headset on correctly and because the dream was fading, but as I took it off it caught itself. For a few seconds, I was somewhere else, but returned to the mall without really noticing. The place might have been full of brownish sand and sort of boxed in somehow.

Now, back in the mall, I run around and explore, excited, although not as aware as in the beginning anymore, but still better than any other lucid dream I've had. I see a small (100ml volume?) box of sodium iodide and think about trying to blow something up (that's hard with sodium iodide, but, again, I had lost awareness in the VR headset segment), but I ended up not trying, both because I didn't know if they'd have any chemical that'd work out with it (forgot that you could summon things since my awareness was shit) and because I didn't want to anymore. As I thought about it, I had actually tried to grab the box of it, but I only had the lid in my hands since it slipped off, and somebody was mad at me since I grabbed it (I had a small fear that someone would notice, but I didn't really care since I was sure I could just flee). And thus, I fled.

I then decided to try some shapeshifting again. I looked at my hands and saw that I had way too many fingers than normal (about 14 on my right hand), so I tried to touch things with the hand to see how having more fingers feels like, and it felt like normal, just slightly different. It's hard to describe. But I didn't want to continue to do something else that is more personal.

I went to a sort of computer terminal and input commands and hoped for them to appear in the dream, but it didn't quite work out. At some point I did a stabilization attempt by inspecting my hands, but still nearly woke up, but ended up back at a sort of bodyless distant view that was even less aware of the terminal, which now looked like a piano/organ, and apparently dracula was playing on it. It sort of was like a comedic variation of some sort of area in a video game. I then sort of had to click on the piano to go to the terminal again to continue typing, and it still didn't work, and then I woke up.

---

That awareness drop after the vr segment was annoying, but being that aware at all was progress, at least. I think I will add something to get more aware of dream control in my dreams.

Also, the first lucid fragment resulted from an extra aware reality check yesterday before I went to bed, since I was a bit disappointed that I couldn't reality check all that much because of school eating my time and stressing me.

I tried to write this dream down in a false awakening, but suddenly my equipment turned into items to dispense and serve sweet cherry wine for the movie's premiere. As a result, I feel like a good chunk of the movie's plot was lost in me trying to record it.

The film started with a live action component, that I vaguely recall starring Will Smih. I think he was trying to break into the disney vaults in the manner of a heist movie, but suddenly, he gets stopped my Deadpool (specifically the Ryan Reynolds one), and probably killed. Deadpool goes to talk to the audience, which ends up in a theatrical segment that took place in the movie theater, where a guy in a deadpool suit ran around the movie theater. He works the classic Marvel/DC rivalry by commenting on the flaws of the various DC Universe cast. Anothe theatrical segment, and the movie theater's side doors open up to reveal two podiums/pillars, one green, and one red. Deadpool then goes on to talk about "the greatest simp in animation history" and talks a little about who it might be. But he leaves the audience to guess, saying "I'll be making donuts in the car park, which kind? You'll never know. Hopefully it's gonna be christopher robin,"

The movie then shows a title card of two ambiguous faces with, "The Simps" as the main title. We then transition to a reading of a Winnie the Pooh story book that appears to be a crossover with other Disney properties and the themes from them, occasionally one would get commentary from Deadpool regarding the characters, as well.
The overall plot of the segment was that the disney Winnie the Pooh characters had crossed their paths with mickey mouse's friends, and they were traveling the continent, trying to keep people from obtaining this crystal. By this point, Christopher Robin had fully grown up,and was still reluctantly leading most of the stuffed animals in the quest. Occasionally, the story would transition verbatim to a narrated storybook format, and my general impression of the tone of the movie was that it was like a more adult version of an older disney film targeted at kids. The characters also seemed to know what was going to happen at certain points, as if this segment was a reanimated version of a pre-existing film that the characters somehow knew about. The steampunk-y aesthetic was similar to some of Disney's later attempts at animated movies. Unfortunately, a lot of the film's dialogue cannot be remembered upon waking up, so I guess it's an odd form of lost media.

After a while, a subplot emerged about a rival to Christopher Robin who acted like a stereoptyical Disney villain I think he also wanted the item that the main team had, and had evil doppelgangers of the rest of the main Winnie the Pooh cast, one line of dialogue from rabbit I remember was, "Why, I can't tell us apart!". Also at one point in the narrative, Eeyore kinda just showed up and didn't say anything, which was probably meant to be comical within the context of the film.

After the whole "Simp" segment, there was a dark-ride-style tour through the disney vaults, as different clips for the Disney animated films played out in 3D, as if they were being filmed.

Thursday, 8/6/20, Core2


False awakening. I heard my alarm going off but something made me suspect I was dreaming and that the alarm was just part of the dream so I didn't hurry to turn it off. I was laying in bed and not moving easily. A finger count reality check confirmed I had too many fingers but for some reason I still wasn't 100% certain I was really dreaming. I thought about rolling "out of my body" and flying but I was reluctant to fling myself out of bed if I turned out to be awake (it's not close to the floor). What can I do that would be easier? I wondered. I tried to affect my environment. The sound of the alarm faded in and out with my focused thought, then I made it go silent. The entire visual of my room faded as well. Oops. I rolled out of bed and floated to the floor, having now convinced myself I was in a dream and that I needed to stabilize it.

A lapse in consciousness as everything faded to black briefly. I found myself standing in the upstairs bathroom. Wait a minute, I thought after a few seconds, How did I get here? Am I still dreaming? I counted my fingers; seven, eight. It was very strange because my hands looked so normal even when I stared directly at them. I checked a couple more times just to convince myself once again. I was looking around me in amazement because everything was so realistic, an exact replica of my waking life bathroom. Clearer, even. I stared at and felt the bumps on the wall, saw how light reflected off the semi gloss, mint green paint. I decided to go downstairs to look around some more. I hope I'm not just awake and really sleep deprived. I thought idly, Otherwise people are going to think I've really lost it, staring at the walls and talking about how amazing they are.

As I walked down the stairs, I pulled at my hand, trying to see if I could morph it. I did, slightly. The weighting of gravity felt so realistic as well that I wondered if I would be able to fly in this dream since it felt like it would be difficult. I tested it by jumping off a few stairs and confirmed I could float. It felt stranger than usual in this environment. I reached the kitchen where my mom was doing dishes. "Hey Mom," I said, "This is a dream."

"Oh, yeah?" she said.

"Yeah." I thought of what I wanted to do with my lucidity. "Do you want me to show you how to fly?" I asked her.

"No that's okay, I already know how to do that. I've done enough of that lately." She went back to doing dishes. I was somewhat mystified by this decision.

"Oh, okay." I wanted to go out back so I started looking around for the nearest exit. I went and opened the front door. "Well, see you later." I added. Wait, why am I looking for a door to go all the way around? I could just take a straight shot through the kitchen wall. I changed course and flew at the wall. I can't believe some people get stuck in walls, it's never happened to me. All you have to do is not think about it. So then, of course, it happened to me. I got stuck in the wall halfway through. It felt like I was moving through molasses and everything went dark for a couple seconds. Then I could see an extremely vague back yard scene. I focused on a point relatively far away - since the closer focal points weren't yielding results - and I set a strong intention to go there directly. I essentially teleported to the intended spot and the scene became vivid and clear once again.

I flew above my yard, which was roughly accurate to waking life but much bigger. I spotted my late cat Pascal, a fluffy, 24-pound Maine Coon, laying in the yard just past the redwood tree. He was staring up at me. I flew lower and slowed, with a bit of difficulty controlling my height and speed initially. "I don't regret any of it!" I announced to him out of nowhere once I landed in front of him. "Well, except I wish we'd realized how sick you were sooner so you didn't have to go like that. We wanted to be there." I knelt down next to my cat and pet him, talking to him about our time together when he was alive, telling him how much I loved him, and pulling twigs and leaves out of his fur. He just continued staring at me with big eyes and purring, though I got the sense he was listening. The dream lapsed into a non-lucid.

Spoiler for Additional Notes:

Definitely one of my clearest LDs, and a really euphoric feeling to see Pascal again. I loved that cat so much. When he was old and sick, he started having trouble breathing and we rushed him to the vet and said yes when they asked if we wanted them to do a procedure to try to save him. He died on the operating table and I really regretted not being with him at the end. In hindsight we didn't recognize how close he was to going so we weren't prepared to let him go and also didn't have time to think it through fully during the emergency. I was determined not to repeat that mistake, and I didn't the next time one of our elderly cats, Talis, no longer had quality of life. It was very tough to make that decision and to find the right balance, but I know that in that case Talis' needs came first. Anyway, it was still good to finally get to tell Pascal how I felt and how much I loved him, even if it was just in a dream.

Created Thursday 06 August 2020

Wow. Lots of things today. False memories of writing notes made me forget some details, as did the phone somehow deleting quite a bit of content. Frickin thing...

Spoiler for Quite long. NSFW violence.:

Scrap Group 1
WILD transition in bed. My vision was terrible, and I had a lot of trouble moving. I could barely float towards the kitchen, where I heard several figures speaking. I called out for their attention, but they didn't seem to listen.

Various FA and SP experiences. Been a while since my last SP, heh. Seeing as I couldn't move, I just waited them out for a more proper transition.

WILD transition in bed. The stage transition sound byte from Sonic Adventure 2 suddenly sounded. Warp. Spectator mode. This was a clip of a 3D Sonic game. Knuckles was running through a bridge/tunnel over a waterway. Tube Panic from Knuckles Chaotix was sounding in the background. After watching for a minute, I manifested into the dream. I flew at high speeds through numerous tunnels.

FA in bed. I assumed I was writing notes. I also failed to notice my speaking with my guide, E.

Dream 1 - August TOTM Basic I

The visuals were dim and quite blurred, mostly due to my face being covered by sheets and a sleeping mask. FA in bed, though I quickly got aware.

Suddenly, a figure pounced on me. I wrestled back, keeping them at arm's length. I soon heard this was my brother Isaac, or rather, someone that sounded somewhat like him. He claimed that I bothered him somehow, but I ignored him. Instead, I asked he take off my covers so that I could finally see more clearly. He begrudgingly complied.

Free of him, I got up to take a better look around. It was then that I noticed the figure glaring at me from bed wasn't Isaac. Instead, he looked suspiciously similar to myself in my adolescence. Regardless, I just thought to only interact with him for reasons of a task.

"Hey.", I began. "Who's dream is this?"

"Your's, obviously.", the younger me responded while rolling his eyes. I didn't expect he'd know as much. This made me very curious.

"Surprised you knew that. Who are you?".

"I'm your subconscious."

I frowned at his answer. "Subconscious? What a load of crap.", I thought to myself. Still, I did want to understand more of this. "I already have E as a guide.", I answered. "I don't need your help".

The kid glowered. "You shouldn't follow her. Don't trust her."

What an incredulous response. I didn't know whether to be insulted, confused, or humored. My 'subconscious' kept deriding E,, while I dismissed him as a misinformed know-nothing. We continued to argue for a bit until the dream collapsed.

Scrap Group 2
Another FA in bed, where I once again thought I wrote some notes down.

Dream 2 - Hog Head Crush

The visuals were dim and quite blurred. FA/SP in bed.

Suddenly, I was beset by a grunting beast: a large feral hog. Couldn't really see it, but it certainly oinked like one. The creature immediately chewed on my scalp, tearing off large chunks of skin. It didn't hurt that much, but that didn't make it any less disturbing. I 'figured' it was avenging the deaths of all the pork I've eaten in my lifetime. Regardless, I got aware.

Seeking vengeance in turn, I tried conjuring a burning aura around me. It only manifested up as thick heat haze. Nonetheless, it worked well enough to scald the creature. The pig squealed and writhed in agony. It tried to run away, but I wasn't gonna let it get off that easy. I clenched its head with my hand. The wild animal mauled me in turn, though that didn't help it any. I dug my burning fingers into its skull. Before long, the hog's head moldered away. The dream collapsed shortly after.

Dream 3 - Late to the Great War

The visuals were dim. FA in bed, though I got aware again.

Soon, a vision appeared before me. It starts with an evening thunderstorm over grassy hills. Continuous lightning strikes illuminated the skies in a spectacular display. Just then, unusual vehicles loomed in from the land and air. From above, a fleet of alien-looking zepplins cruised the skies. From the hills tromped in bulbous tanks with four mechanical legs instead of treads. Although the tech didn't seem like it was from anything found on Earth, it also appeared dated, no more advanced than the interwar period.

And then, a battle erupted. Cluster bombs rained from above, ruining much of the countryside in seconds. By some miracle, most of the tanks remained intact. A constant barrage of artillery shells fired from the horizon, lighting up the clouds. Infantry rushed in from nowhere, taking cover within craters.

It was an equally terrible and mesmerizing sight. I didn't want to just spectate any longer. I manifested within the scene. Rain and winds pressed down hard, keeping me from moving too much. The surprise of that, and my over-eagerness, caused the dream to collapse.


Dream 4 - In The Clutches of Another Hungry Giant Lady

The visuals started quite blurred, though clarified over time. FA in bed, but I quickly got aware. Once again, I had trouble moving. I could only lurch my way out of the house, completely disregarding that I was only in my boxers.

It was a beautiful clear day. The sun glared in my eyes momentarily. As I shambled out the driveway, I overheard Egg Reverie from Sonic Mania sounding in the background. I opted to change it to Track 6 from Dyna Brothers.

Anyway, I paced my way out of the neighborhood. That's when I noticed a few glaring incongruities: the road forward extended for many blocks, there were several 6-story tall condo buildings in the distance, and, above all, there was a stout, similarly-sized gigantic woman tromping around near said buildings.

Interested, I wanted to hurry over there. But, I was really impatient, and decided just to conjure the giant woman towards me. Instead, a colossal cartoon character appeared, though it didn't take long for them to appear lifelike. I looked up, to see it was a different giantess, dark skinned, average build, and roughly 60+ feet in height. The woman was wearing only a red tank-top and boxers, and given that her puffy hair was matted, she obviously only got up from bed as well. She was a bit plain looking, but still, she didn't look bad given the circumstances.

Suddenly, the woman scooped me up in one hand. As startling as that was, I kept my composure. I began greeting her, but the sleepy giantess snarled back before I could finish. Just then, she dragged me into her gaping mouth! Her teeth and molars clamped down at my midsection. She fiercely gnawed and yanked on my torso with her jaws, knocking the air out of me, harshly bruising my skin, and breaking my bones. Gotta say, this stung like hell.

Acting quick, I tried turning my body into stone, though In my haste, I could only do so on my back. Nonetheless, this was more than enough to crack and chip her top teeth. The giantess gasped in pain. Soon, she lost her hold on me, and I fell.

I found myself landing back to my bed. I awakened promptly.

No techniques used, completely random lucid after ~6 hours of sleep.

Had a long non-lucid dream about wandering around town while being late for work. In the end I ended up on a beach and because I felt extremely tired I laid down on the sand. Immediately, I felt a sinking sensation which I associated with WILD so I got somewhat aware already. I relaxed completely and 'awoke' in my bed the next moment. Being pretty sure of having a false awakening I got up and looked around. My surroundings were more vivid than ever; for further testing I precisely inspected some furniture nearby. I couldn't believe how real everthing felt and looked and RCed to confirm my dream state.

Walking over to the window I now saw differences to reality. There was a large window facade and I looked down into a sort of foyer with another wall consisting of glass. Down there was a DC with a bike trying to leave the building through the glass wall but couldn't get through. Thinking to myself that I'll succeed where he failed I passed through the windows (though they seemed solid at first) and slowly floated down. I tried to remember what I had planned to do next in a lucid dream but my memory was largely inaccessible. Only some tasks of the year came to my mind, so I proceeded to fly away from here. Outside I somehow found myself in my parents' garden - but a version from more than ten years ago. Suddenly, flying felt physically exhausting (what kind of nonsense in a dream...) and I woke up.

Lucid Diving

I am watching something that one of my friends posted on social media. It is a video of herself talking about how you should not limit yourself to just one boyfriend or girlfriend. As long as you don’t do anything to make the other ones jealous, you can have three of them or so until you get married (three at once, that is). She makes an analogy to buying a car. This speech surprises me and kind of upsets me, because I didn’t think she was that kind of a girl. I think about making some reply to her…

…I am sitting somewhere looking at a picture of a house on the internet. I realize that this house looks just like the one that is in front of me across the street. What a coincidence! Then I think that perhaps I should do a reality check. Sure enough, it’s a dream.

I go down to a pond (or river, perhaps). I decide that it would be interesting to go under water. The pond is kind of dirty and murky, but that doesn’t matter too much since this is a dream. I dive in. It is difficult to see, so I call out for more clarity or visibility, or something. The water lightens up and it is easier to see. I think I also do another reality check to reinforce my lucidity. I dive down to the bottom. I think it would be neat to see how far down I can go, even through the bottom, so I kind of start digging into the sediment. Then I think I have a false awakening…

…(Not sure if this is the same dream. I feel like it was.) Instructing students in a lab. Part of the lab involves using a microscope (in my dream it’s called a laser scanner, or something). I don’t really remember how to use it, and I try to get someone to show me…

Fragments

…There is a mem about some political figure. I look for this online, in the context of Star Trek…

…Something involving a scene that, earlier, I was supposed to remember and sketch for some reason (I think). There is a stop sign hanging from the ceiling, and some tough superhero-type guy there. I know at some point he is going to knock the sign down…

Jamie

Dreamt I woke up in bed and Jamie was there already getting busy with something naughty. Won't give any details either than she likes to make comical faces.

Dark

Strange dream. I was in a room with a young girl maybe 8. This was a FA on a particular day where i was having trouble sleeping. So while I'm trying to babysit this girl i am trying to sleep in bed and the room is small. So i get her to go to sleep as well. But I tell her to go to the corner of the bed and not beside me, I don't want anyone to walk in and think I'm a pedo. She's restless though and is hard to convince to go to sleep. There's a part where we were also playing video games on a TV.

FA, i'm in the same bed but have sleep apnea, or paralysis. I look at the ceiling and see an evil face in the pattern of texture spatter. I immediately feel it's a demonic presence. I can feel it trying to take over my mind. I let it in for a while, but I only feel it's pure darkness and fear. It wants to spread fear because it FEARS eternity in hell, which is whee it will wind up eventually. I call out to Jesus a bit and...

FA, back in the room with the girl. I ask he if she fell asleep yet. She says no. I say, "Me neither." I get up and apperently her mother is there but she's talking about demonic things (maybe the same demon controlling multiple levels of dreams???). We get into an argument about eligion and I say I am saved by Jesus. She tries to retort and says we won't get along.

good to have a nice jamie dream though.

Saturday Night, 7/18/20

I had an FA. I noticed that the perspective was wrong for waking up; I was looking down on my bed. I floated around the room a bit, confirming I was dreaming. I noticed the room was vague and the dream did not feel very stable. I aimed for the floor of my room and landed, bounced up and down a little trying to feel the carpet on the soles of my feet. I could hear a soft crunching sound, like the sound of velvet being gently crushed. The dream faded anyway, my vision going black. However, I still felt more connected to the dream than to my waking life body so I tried to imagine "throwing" myself back into the dream. I opened my eyes, a bit uncertain whether it would work, but it did. I was back in my room standing on the ground. I floated again to confirm. Up near the ceiling I grabbed onto the top of the cube structure where there was a wooden platform (it's sort of like the top of a bookcase). I alternated between staring at the wood grain and rubbing my hand across the wood. Sure enough the grains of the wood became incredibly detailed and lifelike. Looking around I could now see the lines on the palms of my hands, the bumps on the blue walls, the sharp outlines of various pieces of furniture.

Satisfied that the dream was fully stabilized, I phased through the window of my room and glided over the land below. It was quite beautiful out, sunrise coloring the clouds. Although my backyard was much bigger than in waking life it was otherwise consistent with its current configuration. At least up until the stand of bamboo at the far end. Behind there and off to the right, instead of a fence, I found an open plot of dirt with a partially built lighthouse. At last! I thought, Although, I was kind of hoping to have it by an ocean... I considered that on the one hand it was convenient to have it close to my house but on the other hand I would have to use some trick of the mind in order to make use of it as I'd originally planned, as a lighthouse by the sea.

Off to my left a woman and two young children were wandering from the bamboo forest into my backyard. I waved at the family. The youngest child, the boy, seemed to be the only one who saw me. He tried to get his mother and sister to look over. The mother squinted in my general direction and shrugged before continuing on her way. The little boy looked confused. I told him not to worry about it. It wasn't clear if he could hear me. I returned my attention to the lighthouse and saw that the first floor was thoroughly encased in rock and therefore inaccessible. I had planned to have steps carved into rock leading up to the base of the building and I mused that the dream must have constructed it this way like a bug in a video game when it was placed somewhere different from the intended landscape. The next two floors were far smaller than I'd planned. Beyond that it was completely unfinished. I began planning how I would fix it and build it out as if I were using Minecraft blocks. I wondered if I should leave it with its current black and white colors or change them to match the colors I'd planned for it when I designed it in waking life. I had only just begun modifying the structure when I heard a loud sound. Annoyed, I looked up to see that some random guy on a motorcycle had ridden up and parked behind the lighthouse, apparently oblivious to my presence. When I saw that he wasn't going to interfere further I tried to return my concentration to the task at hand but the dream faded into a different scene and I lapsed into non-lucidity.

Spoiler for Additional Notes:

Made progress on two of my LD goals: creating a lighthouse and experimenting with dream cartography. The lighthouse is a place I designed in waking life that I had never encountered in a dream before. Basically I was trying to incubate it by creating drawings, written pieces, and even a design in Minecraft creative mode (which is no doubt why I ended up modifying it with Minecraft blocks in this dream). This was my first success in finding/creating the lighthouse in an LD, although I'd come across a version of it briefly in a non lucid once. I'd originally planned to build it from scratch near a particular recurring beach location. Instead I found it partially constructed... in my backyard. I didn't actively work to recall my waking life goal during the LD as I usually would, instead I just explored and found what I needed quickly. That makes this my first successful LD incubation attempt, as well.

Additionally, I've been wanting to not only map out my recurring dream locations but to experiment with creating new ones and testing their level of permanence and the permanence of the connections between dream locations. Behind the bamboo in my backyard happens to be one spot I'd considered using for experimentation as I'd rarely gone into the bamboo area in dreams and never off to the right. Apparently my subconscious decided to combine two ideas and gave me a partial lighthouse in that spot. I think I'll just find some way to work with this development. Maybe I'll use the lighthouse like a TARDIS lol.

Another side note: When I was very young my dad started building a wooden playhouse in the backyard and never finished it (eventually we took it down). This seems to be a symbolic reference to that, although I'm not sure why.

No techniques used, just had some intention and slept an hour longer than usual.

In a normal dream some seven hours after first going to bed I slowly realized that I was dreaming and that I could take control. When I was fully lucid I "woke up" in my bed though, but by RCing I caught the false awakening. Trying to get up I noticed that I could barely move. So, I carefully rolled to the side and put my feet on the floor. I still couldn't stand up and so I let myself slide to the floor next to the bed. I hoped to gain more control over my dream body when getting further away, so I crawled through the room. This felt kinda strange because I could move through the furniture to some extent. Somehow I came to imagine being in a transparent sphere which I could roll by pushing the sides. Like this, I moved around a bit until I awoke again in the bed.

I RCed again just to be sure and surprisingly I was still dreaming (I could have guessed because I heard someone snoring in the other room - with nobody there). Realizing I was still too groggy to go anywhere I sat up and simply meditated. Everything got completely still immediately. Then, I woke up for real.

I’d just woken up, and I began to record myself explaining my dreams while they were still fresh in my mind. Never mind that it was on an app that doesn’t exist, I didn’t pick up on that, but while telling my dreams I had the idea to do a reality check. I counted six fingers and realized this was a dream!


I put my phone down, walked toward my bedroom door, and told myself out loud, “I am in my house in [town I used to live in].” (I opened the door.) “The dream is clear and stable.”


I chose to go to that house so I could find my parents, because I live alone but had to find a DC so I could complete the TOTM, but why I picked that house specifically, I’m not sure. We moved out of that house in 2013; I didn’t leave home until 2019.


Immediately, my vision became more vivid (I hadn’t realized it before but it was kind of dull color-wise). I was still in my apartment, but standing in front of me was a man.


“Guten Nacht,” I said. (Yes, I meant Guten Tag, but close enough? Autocorrect tried to change this to Gluten Nacho.)


“Guten Nacht,” he replied. He said something else I didn’t understand. The only word I recognized was verstehen (understand), so I assumed he was asking if I understood German. We were entering the dining room now. (I looked up verstehen while typing this; it’s conjugated wrong for second person, but it DOES mean understand. Yay for recognizing one of the handful of German words I know!)


I tried to recall how to tell him I don’t speak German. “No spreche… German. Alemán?” (Alemán means “German” in Spanish.)


“Alemannisch,” he corrected me.


“Deutsch,” I corrected myself. We were in the kitchen now, and I doubted I could carry this conversation further, so I decided to wake up so I could write it down right away.


By the way, it turns out Alemannisch actually refers to a group of Upper German dialects spoken in Switzerland and parts of Germany and Austria—but I didn’t know that, so I’m going to assume my brain just tacked a German suffix onto a Spanish word in an attempt to make it German. Whatever works, right?

Finally a WILD success to report! WILD 12 did the trick, and was followed by a DEILD of its own! Let's get into it:

Awake/explanation
Normal dream
Semi-lucid dream
Lucid dream

12:00 AM - 3:00 AM

I fell asleep so late last night I decided to abandon my first 2 hour alarm at 1:30 AM, because I knew if I slept only 1h30m, I wouldn't have had any dreams. When my alarm woke me at 3:00 AM however (approx. 3 hours of sleep), I remembered a dream!

I was trying to go into some kind of swimming pool/resort place, but I realized my phone was losing charge and I wouldn't be able to listen to any music/books, so I decided not to stay after all. I was in my car driving home, when I crossed through the parking lot of some place called Cafe... something. I can't remember the name, but as I was looking at it, I thought-- that sounds pretty nice. I could go for some coffee. And it also was the end of my work-day and I was driving home anyway, so I pull over into the parking lot.

There was a lady in a phonebooth nearby who was arguing so loudly I could hear her screaming, but I couldn't understand what she was saying specifically. I locked my door and started to walk away from my car, and as I got about halfway there, two people came out of the store, a guy and a girl, and I suddenly remembered I left my wallet sitting in the passenger seat of my car. So I went back, unlocked the door, pulled it out, and headed in-- while still listening to phonebooth woman yelling at someone over the phone.

I go into the store and notice it's much larger than I expected, with a full first floor, and also an escalator that goes up to a second floor. I'm a little overwhelmed because I really don't know much about coffee, though I like it alright, so I just start walking around in a counterclockwise circle looking at the walls. As I pass the escalator I see a group of 4-5 children with a woman watching over them, who seem to be getting something for themselves, like decaffeinated coffee, and they're all picking various flavors and creamers while she watches. I walk past them and notice I'm in a "kids' section" of coffee, and just sort of glance over things there and keep walking.

As I'm walking near the back aisles of the store, I hear a woman say, "everything alright?" and I just ignore her for some reason, thinking she's not talking to me I guess. She says again, "Can I help you with anything?" and I turn and look at her a little startled and say, "Oh, no, I'm just enjoying looking around," with a little laugh, and then say, "all this coffee is making me almost want to buy something." She laughs too and says, "Imagine how I feel working here." I notice she's an older lady, probably in her 50s, a little chubby and wrinkly and she seems nice. I tell her, "I just was on my way home and saw the store and decided to come have a look," and she says, "Oh, you're on your way home, did you stop downtown?" I tell her no, and she says, "There's an film festival happening there, you should have went and looked around!"

Someone had mentioned this to me earlier in the dream I remember, but I can't remember when, but as I was telling her, "yeah, someone mentioned that to me earlier," I woke up.

When I woke up, I decided to do my WILD, and as usual I fell asleep without transitioning.

3:00 AM - 4:30 AM

I woke up again before my next alarm which was set at 5 AM, and I think because my alarm has been set at 4:30 I didn't comprehend this, because I got up as usual, peed, and laid back down. Here I began thinking about King Yoshi's WILD Guide which I have mentioned before. In it, he mentions that a technique for stopping dry-spells is to pretend that you are an expert at what you're doing, and very confident you'll have the lucid dream.

Taking this a step further in my groggy state, I first start saying to myself, "Oh, yes, I know exactly what I'm doing," in my head, and, "I'll definitely succeed at this WILD, I do it all the time, it's very natural to me, like breathing." I'm kinda amused by this and suddenly while adjusting myself I'm just playing along with the idea and find myself talking to a fake audience, saying, "Ladies and gentlemen, you're about to see a lucid dream performed live on stage for your entertainment-- I'll be lying here and for the next two hours you'll be utterly entertained by the world of fantasy unfolding on the screen above your heads, whereon you can see everything I can see..."

I continue running with this mind-voice, promising them that it will be fantastic, as I comfy myself, then saying, "Now, I need absolute silence from the audience as I enter into one of the most difficult parts, wherein I must fall asleep comfortably," and I chuckle at this and get comfortable on my side and begin trying to count down in my head with each breath in and out.

4:30 AM - 5 AM

Suddenly, I'm awoken by my actual alarm going off, and I roll over and shut it off and lie back down, mentally saying to my fake audience, "That was a close call, ladies and gentlemen, what you saw was almost me failing for the entire night, but fear not! The alarm has caught me and now I will roll over and begin anew, and once more I need total silence please." I laid down on my right side now, and began counting down again, and quickly, I found myself lying in my bed in the morning with the sun shining through the window and the smell of breakfast from the other room.

I sat up, thinking, darnit, I messed up again! But then I reach up and plug my nose and find that I can breathe. I'm baffled by this, because I feel 100% awake and as if this is the realest, most regular awakening ever. Everything looks normal, sounds normal, feels normal. I plug my nose and try again and can still breathe. I'm so confused I think something is wrong with my nose, I can't understand how I can breathe.

But, I think, I have to be dreaming! There's nothing else that it could mean! So I basically leap out of bed and look at my hands, which look normal, and I start rubbing them together to increase the stability of the dream. I walk through the kitchen where my dad's making breakfast, and tell him I'm going outside. He seems puzzled by this but I open the door without waiting for his response and walk down the sidewalk and into the front yard. I'm still telling myself, "I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming!" because everything is so real I'm afraid I could lose it at any time.

As I'm walking into the front yard I remember my goal of "splitting a mountain with my aura" for the lucid dream tasks of July. So, wondering how to even do that, I begin screaming at the top of my lungs trying to somehow "charge up" like in DragonBall Z or something. Nothing really happens and I feel my voice becoming raspy, and have a faint moment of hoping I'm not actually awake and screaming in my front yard at the top of my lungs, lol.

But, to quell my fears, I immediately run an acre or two into the yard as fast as possible, and I'm able to run so quickly I know that it can't be real life. I stop again, and begin yelling again, trying to do... something, and my next idea is to stomp on the ground so hard it sends my aura out and splits the mountains. So I stomp on the ground, and nothing happens. Next, I bend down and punch the ground as hard as I can, then stand up and look around. Suddenly, I notice something falling and look up, only to see the moon has turned dull grey and is falling through the atmosphere breaking into pieces and falling to Earth, lol. So, I think, I can destroy the moon-- surely I can destroy a mountain. (Also I don't know why the moon was directly overhead during the day, don't ask questions.)

Again I punch the ground as hard as I can, then look up once more, and in the distance I see a mountain breaking into pieces and crumbling into dust, and I feel self-satisfied that I achieved my goal. When I woke up I feared I had failed, thinking the goal was to "split the mountain," but it turns out the goal was simply to "break a mountain," so I think I passed after all!

Content with this, I remember I had wanted to explore the mountain after it split. It kind of just crumpled into dust, but I figured it still might be worth seeing what was there. So I head over that way and find some small lumps of tiny mountain still standing next to a house. What's more, they seem to be lightly glowing, so I begin kicking at them and trying to see what's underneath. Eventually I take my hands and slash the air in their direction, as if cutting X's into them, and soon one begins to erupt, as if it were a tiny volcano. Without thinking I reach out with my hand and catch a piece of lava, and find out it is unbearably hot and drop it on the ground (not sure what I was expecting). I pull my hood up over my head (suddenly wearing a hoodie I guess) and pick up a piece of rock that has some lava sitting on it, and throw it at the nearby house, just to see if I can catch it on fire (I guess I'm kind of destructive, huh?).

It doesn't, so I head over to the house; I somehow teleport inside the house and don't know how. This confuses me and makes me worry I'm losing control, so I begin rubbing my hands together again to reassert control and stability in the dream, and then I decide to exit the house by holding onto a banister and kicking my way through a window. I do so and slide out onto the ground awkwardly, but get out nonetheless, lol.

I walk away from the houses and notice that I'm on a hill, overlooking a golf-course, and there's another hill above me-- and people are hitting golf-balls off the hill into the course as if it's a driving range. I head up on the hill and at this time, a friend of mine, Brooks, comes and begins talking but I don't listen well, and soon after a girl he used to date comes up and begins complaining that someone has broken the window out of her house. She questions him, and then me, and remembering that I don't have to stay here for this and have better things to do, I smile at her and then turn and jump off the hill and begin gliding down into the golf course with my arms out like wings.

However, I'm not satisfied to glide, and think about how I always have trouble truly flying. I remember how on the forums here at Dreamviews, someone said that the key to dream control was to simply know that it would work. As a symbolic gesture, I simply drop my arms by my side and begin saying to myself, "I don't need to worry, I'll simply lift into the air and float. This is my mind; I control everything here."

Surely enough, I begin rising into the air, fairly rapidly, up above the trees, until suddenly I see a cliff overhang I hadn't noticed before. I float along underneath it and land on a small platform and notice there is a nametag on it, and a ragtag house. The nametag says "William" something or other, and I turn around to see a little anthropomorphic mole (standing on his hind legs) looking up at me. When turning around, I accidentally bump him and he falls off the platform, like 10 stories, and hits the ground. I look down after him trying to ascertain that he's okay, and when I see him get up and brush himself off I decide he is.

I start walking into his little house (uninvited, lol) and soon encounter another little mole person who is pointing a shovel at me warily, and I tell him, "Sorry, sorry, I don't mean to intrude!" and he threatens me with the tiny shovel again, and I say, "Your friend is okay, he's coming, look!" and I point down at him coming up in a little elevator. The one pointing the shovel at me continues holding it out but looks down at him.

And suddenly, just like that, the lights go out. I have no idea what time it is, but I realize I've woken up, and I hold my eyes firmly shut and just lie there. I feel like I'm struggling to fall asleep again. Eventually, I open my eyes and I'm in my room, but now it's dark. Once more I think, "Darn, the DEILD attempt didn't work," and start to get up, thinking it's the middle of the night still. Then I stop, and plug my nose again as I'm getting out of bed. And I find I can breathe! Once again I'm baffled by how real the false awakening feels, and how quickly I dismissed it as being real life, and am glad I did another reality check before taking it for granted. I stand up and go over to my door in the dark, and think, "When I open this door, I'll be overlooking the rings of Saturn," which is the first thing that comes to mind. I open the door, and instead I'm looking at my hallway, and my dog is at my feet wagging her tail. I close the door in her face (lol), and think, "When I open this door, I'll be somewhere fantastic!" and I open the door again. Once again, I'm in the hallway and my dog is at my feet wagging her tail.

I say, "alright, fine," and walk through the door with my dog following me. It's now light as I exit the hallway, and my dad is in the kitchen making breakfast, and I say, "Good lord, how long have you been making breakfast?" and he says, "About an hour," (LOL) and I walk past him and go out the door into the yard again. This time I stop and bend down to pet my dog, and I notice her eyes are shut and her face is even more greyed than in real life, and I sympathetically say, "Oh no, you're getting all old girl!" and as I say it I realize I've made a mistake. She starts bending down and coughing up phlegm and stuff and I think, "Oh no, I set the expectation that my dog is old and sickly and now she's gonna die in front of me," so I start backing away from her and saying, "No, just kidding, you're young and spritely! You're even younger than real life! I've never seen you so energetic!" but I'm also backing away from her because I don't want to get distracted with this and want to go do more lucid dreaming stuff.

As I'm heading into the driveway, I look back and see my dog is indeed young and healthy again like when she was a puppy, and she comes bounding down after me into the driveway. I start jumping in the air repeatedly, thinking to fly again, and then I stop and think, "Oh yeah, there was that other dream task of milking something!"

No sooner did I think this than I suddenly found myself trapped in some strange, half-awake state, unable to move. It was like one of my eyes was seeing my bed in real life, and the other eye was seeing the dream, and the dream was suddenly "locked up." I was just stuck there floating in space, and I closed my real life eye (this was purely an illusion/dream, not reality I think) and still I was stuck in the dream, but now I was back in the mole house sitting on a sofa, unable to move. There was a man there talking to me about lucid dreaming in theory, and I told him, "Actually, I'm lucid dreaming right now, I just can't move!"

He went bug-eyed at this and then began scoffing at the idea, and I said, "No, no! I really am, I'm just stuck!" and while ignoring his scoffing I somehow accidentally found myself awake for real.

I did another reality check JUST TO BE SURE, and then laid down again in my bed and patted myself on the back. Finally, at least one decent LD after a week of work!

Edit: listening to my audio logs I also discovered I reported a dream fragment I had forgotten, but I don't know when it happened:

I had a dream I was playing Runescape (lol) and came across these two guys swarming around this emerald lying on the ground as if they were protecting it. I walked up to them and watched them for a bit and then just ran up and took it off the ground. They both ran after me telling me they were trying to protect it and I needed to drop it, and I just said, "No, that's okay," and logged out and changed to another world (lol). Once I got there I used a spell to go home and then walked away still holding the emerald, but I accidentally wandered into a dangerous area and got the crap kicked out of me and died, dropping all my stuff.

Panicking a little, I ran back there again and picked it all back up and tried to run back to the home town, but again got killed and dropped everything again, but a little closer back to home.

But I woke up shortly thereafter.

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

I'm in a city and I get lucid. I remember my goal about bending different elements and try to summon a fire but nothing happens. I remember my goal about meeting the bending master and decide to meet with the master. I scream out loud. "Master! Master!", but no one comes. I fly over the waters to an island and meet a group of people. I ask them where I can find the master of bending. They tell me to go back the way I came from. I fly to where I came from and think about how the trip to where I came from is different from when I fly the same way back. My vision is getting darker and I recognize this feeling. I'm going to wake up in my bed. It's all black and I feel my bed against my skin. I do a RC and know it's still a dream. My vision is black for a while and I walk against the window to fly out. The floor on the streets are gone. It's just white void there. I fly over a house and experience some special experiences. It's like I fly upside down and I'm not the one in control. The void is beautiful and I just hang with the dream. I remember my goal about meeting with the master again and start to fly to where I was going before. The flying is going pretty slowly and I try to speed it up pretty often, but it doesn't work. I finally come to the right place and I see a castle. I meet up with Klaus there and he greets me and says. "Ahh, you have come here to forfill your goal!" with his typical way of talking when he is to tell a joke that he thinks is funny. I say yes and ask him where the master is. He points into the castle but it is divided into three parts so I have to ask which part I shall go into. He says the one to the right. I enter it and I suddenly only have my dad's white underwear on me. I think to myself that this is a castle and I need better clothes if I want to meet with the prince. Some people with fancy suits comes up. I punch one really hard in order to take his clothes. I am disappointed over myself because I used violence against my DC and decide to just walk into the next room with only my underwear on me. I walked pretty quickly because there were people who saw me when I hit the man. There is a biograph and the prince of Sweden is the one hosting it. There are brown blankets on each chair and I take one to cover myself with. The prince says something and he is the master I've been looking for. I decide to watch the movie before I talk to him. The movie starts. Someone in the movie says something about hands and shoulders (all my dreams are in swedish) and a woman in the audience repeats the sentence as if the sentence had wrong gramatics in it. I repeat the sentence in my head but decides that the sentence was right. After a while the move comes out of the screen and I see it right in front of me. There is a dirt pile and some insects fighting each other. I wonder when it is going to end so I can meet with the master. I interact with the dirt pile and move an insect. There is a dog and a child too. I feel as the dream fades...

I’m gonna skip the first part; it was a boring non-lucid about checking my reddit messages.

Then I woke up and decided to check my reddit messages for real. I logged on and didn’t question why I wsn’t logged in already, or why it said “pepper” instead of “password”, but I did question why the site switched to French when I logged in. I fully believed I was awake and this was just a silly website glitch, but I did a reality check anyway. I struggled to count my fingers (I blamed sleep deprivation for my sudden inability to focus), but I thought I counted six. This didn’t seem right, so I repeated my RC: six fingers. I was dreaming.

I didn’t get my usual rush of excitement, maybe because of the confusion and difficulty surrounding the RC, but that was a good thing, because it actually allowed me to stop and think instead of running around and acting on impulse.

I asked myself what my goals were for this dream (first time I remembered) and recalled that one of the DV beginner goals was to look around and describe my surroundings. I began with my pillowcase (which looked almost like in real life except the circles on it were brown and only one shade of blue) and described it out loud as being “black and tan”. Then I realized I’d got the colors wrong and tried again, though I don’t remember what I said the second time.

Suddenly, my vision went black. I was afraid I was waking up but reminded myself to keep calm. I could still feel my dream body, so I walked across the room, hoping to anchor myself in the dream world. It worked, and my vision returned briefly. I don’t remember what happened next, but shortly after, my vision turned black again and I could feel my body in bed. I knew on some level I was still asleep, but I also knew I was waking up. I could hear birds chirping outside, so I figured I’d reached the “point of no return” of waking up and opened my eyes.

Funny enough, the birds turned out to be part of the dream. When I woke up, I couldn’t hear any birds, just the neighbors talking.

Awake|Dreaming|Lucid

I'm at a psychiatric hospital and I am to be examined. I'm scared and recognize the scene of the dream. I'm anxious because I know something bad is going to happen. There is a nurse coming and she says I'm supposed to go to another room. I walk into the room and there is a school class room there. I go and sit on a chair on the edge of a row. Some people are teasing me there so I move one row back. I hear the people in front of me talking about how they got money to just sit there. I say so in a paniced voice to the person next to me. He is shocked. The teacher pulls out a gun and starts to shoot at me but misses. I run to the exit and find a revolver and starts to shoot at the teacher but I miss. I only have two ammunition left and hide behind a corner. I reveal myself and try to shoot the teacher in the head and I'm sure that I will hit him if I pull the trigger. I shoot but nothing happens. After I while I'm just screaming as loud as I can and crawling out the door.

I'm by a town and I'm supposed to be Spiderman. I try to use my Spiderman powers to swing myself but it's hopeless. The web I shoot from my wrist is all sloppy and won't attach to the things I shoot it at. I succeed to climb up to a building and I'm hiding from something.

I'm in a car with my mother who drives. We are going to the church. I walk in and go to the left most part of the church because I'm looking for someone. No one is there. I walk to the right most part of the church and on my way I meet up with some missionaries by the kitchen. There is a good looking missionary who says he is going to see the whole world and his charismatics is the thing that is going to help him do so. I walk to the next room and see Diego by the piano. We are supposed to do something together.

A girl has dumped me and I know it's because I was not cool enough for her. I'm by a room and know she is somehow watching me. I change shirt just to show her that I'm actually fit and I act in a cool way. My mother and sister are also there.

I'm sleeping in my brother's bed. I'm trying to sleep but I don't succeed because it's way to early. I try to sleep because it's so boring. I'm irritable because I can't sleep.

I'm talking with someone about a distant memory we had together and I'm transformed into the memory. I see two small children sitting by a long table, eating soup, in a pretty dark room. One of the children walks to three dark men who are looking malnourished. The child is greeting them happily and that cheers them up. I'm scared of the three men because I thought they would harm the children but I think it's beautiful how the child managed to make the malnourished men happy. The second child also joins the three men and the first child. They are laughing together and having a good time.

Notes: When I woke up I didn't remember any dreams. After thinking a while I remembered all these! I don't think I have ever remembered six dreams in one night. I dreamt the dream about being dumped because I saw a movie about a man who were not cool and got dumped because of that and later on becoming cool so the girl wanted him back.

I typed this up in great detail, and then the page reloaded and didn't save any of it. SO here's the much shorter run down.
MCT oil, raw honey, melotonin, and tincture blend (African dream root, bobinsana root, blue lotus, calea z, mugwort, lemon balm, damiana) around 10:45, asleep by 11. Multiple dreams and multiple Lucids, woke up several times but the dreams continued each time, so here's the important stuff I remember.

Theres a party in my apartment, lots of people are hanging out. Someone does a hit of coke in my kitchen, causing me to question the situation. I look at my hands. Tooooo many fingers. I tell someone else to look at her hands, she agrees with me, this is a dream.
I go to my room to go to bed, the apartment is empty now, my roommate says something to me. I look at my hands again, yes this is still a dream. I grab some pillows off my bed, sit on the floor to meditate. Several Om Mani Padme Hums later, I open my eyes. My room is no longer my bedroom, but a concrete industrial type room with floor to ceiling windows on the two outward facing walls. This is sharper, more in focus than any lucid dream I've had in a long time, the meditation was well worth it. I decide to seek the McDouble I've been after in several of my last lucids. I turn toward the windows, expecting to break one and jump out, but to my surprise theres a window that opens easily, and a staircase leading to the ground. I walk down, and think of the task of the month. A breeze starts up, cooler and fresher than it has any right to be.
As I walk through this city scape, I look at the DCs and am aware they are simply projections of my subconcious. I lock eyes with one, he knows what I am thinking.
Strawberries grow like weeds against a building. I pick some, a nearby tree whacks me with its branches, these are not my strawberries.
I see my families old tan van, I climb in, find Mcdonalds bags (clearly full of trash). I search one anyways, hoping to find a McDouble. My mother is in the drivers seat, says she'll take me to a McDonalds. She drives, and as she is on a collision course with a wall, I close my eyes. I open them, and now we're at McDonalds. We're so close, my McDouble dreams are coming true. I place my order, get my burger, take several bites so big I finish nearly half the sandwhich at once. No ketchup. I wander the store, find a ketchup bottle on a shelf, douse my burger, take some more bites. Perfect.
I sit at a long table, my mother to my right, the people from the party filling the other seats. Soon we are all eating chocolate covered strawberries, which are much tastier than the burger. My mother and I fight about my unhealthy eating habits, but I tell her this is a dream and I can eat whatever I like. She leaves.
I wake up for the final time.
During one of the times I woke up, I had my usual false awakening during which I thought I was writing in my DJ, only to wake up and find out that never happened. This occurs at least once every night.