All DJ Entries

Really need to finish catching up on DJ, getting close to current dreams now. I also feel I maybe do need to start giving proper titles to my DJ entries for quicker reminders at a glance of what they're about. I don't like doing it sometimes because I often change my mind about what the focus of the dream was.

11th August 2020

Dream:

Somewhat fragmented. One of the first parts was inside a building, nicely decorated. Public works type of building. Something about me needing a Greek lawyer, without this lawyer some cronies would just be able to punch me as much as they wanted or something? Marble flooring and generally ornate detailing. Don't remember much else.

Then I remember coming out from my old home building's main entrance. I casually walked across the short distance to the entrance of the shop here. The fruit stands weren't where they'd normally be. They were all piled up on top of one another by the entrance, kind of.

There was a basket with green pears. The entrance seemed wider than I remember it? Theo was standing there, watching, so I asked him for some of those pears and he asked how many. Three, I replied for whatever reason.

He put the pears in a clear plastic bag and then I walked closer and he gave them to me. Then I went in the shop and he returned to his usual business. It was surprisingly busy inside. The layout was a slightly altered version of how I remember it, but with a bit of expansion that wouldn't be physically possible. (In which direction?)

I roamed around inside the shop. There was a display counter (where he'd typically have the cheeses, hams, etc.) and I saw some of those heart shaped pastries I like in there. I got two and put them away somehow, in a bag? I remember looking around a bit more but then the next thing I remember is being outside and walking back toward the building's entrance.

Mom came out of the main entrance, I think, and T was arriving from the main entry point into the cul-de-sac. I remember thinking this was all in good timing, as we could then have an afternoon snack together or something.

---

Notes:
- I think I feel this dream is something of a closing chapter on some of my older memories. My family looked as they do now and I felt as I do now. But the shop had already changed after I first left. Theo no longer owns and runs it and that's a part of my childhood that will remain nothing more than a memory now.
- I can't remember why three may have been significant (three can always be significant for whatever reason we want, there were three pears and three of us and so on...) but the dream's choice of fruit in the pear was probably because I had recently had thoughts about having pears, a fruit I haven't had in quite a long time now.

- Though I don't remember the details specifically anymore, I think it was a sunny day.

- I have a rather peculiar thing with timings, for some reason. The encounter of my mom and my sibling just as I'm coming back to the building's entrance is just such a simple example of my peculiar timings but over the last few months I have found myself having a lot of passing thoughts about my timings.

11th May

Dream:Earliest dream. I was in some place in the countryside, the dream was very vivid. I had my boots on, some pants, some t-shirt and my leather jacket. H was walking with me, I remember feeling the gravel beneath my feet.

In the dream I was recognising the place. I'd been here before in some other dream. This prompted me to tell H about it and he sort of dismissed it and even though I tried doing some reality checks with my hands, I didn't become aware of the dream state.

In my dream mind, this place wasn't exactly like how I remembered it from the other dream anyway. There was a gravel road and some buildings and some gravel plots along it, but the original place I was remembering had a normal road and it carried on, it didn't end abruptly like this gravel road. It reminded me of the southern areas of my country. There were pine trees and short grass that looked a bit dry. The dirt was fine and dusty and caramel coloured. The sky was a little bit cloudy but mostly clear and it seemed like the sun was setting. I remember looking all around me to try and identify anything from the original dream, but I felt there was nothing. The surroundings looked vast and vague at the same time.

After walking along the road with H for a while, we eventually came to a very large gravel lot, like a parking lot, clearly meant for that use. I remember H telling me to wait here. He had to get some book, or something, from town? I said I'd wait. I didn't know what I'd do in the meantime and I had the feeling that it would be a long time. Then my awareness transitioned to some other place.

A dream city. H wasn't here and though I have forgotten the dream plot exactly, there was something about a family that had to get to where I just was (the gravel/pine tree area). I was here to speed things along somehow? Something about a gang going after this family.

Then details are missing; I remember getting into a car, a silver convertible and also trying to fix down a panel on the boot or something. Then the mom of this family, who was driving, started the car before I'd even sat down and put a seatbelt on. She raced through the streets and I had little balance, tipping backwards and holding the open and swaying door with my right hand. I was partially sat on her son's legs, eventually he managed to help me in, but it took a while.

Some other part of the same dream. The chronology of the sequences is muddled. I went into a tall building and I remember carrying my black backpack and climbing lots of stairs. I didn't feel tired at all and my legs didn't hurt. Along the way, some young adult (early 20s) tugged on my backpack to have an easier time climbing. I resent that he'd done that but I said nothing and only gave him a look that made it clear to him not to do it again.

The staircase was very much like the one from my university. Very narrow, but no lift at each landing. Eventually I got to a pretty high floor, and it looked like my virtual gallery in some sense. There was a high open space that my fear of heights creep in a little, because there were no railings at all. I remember wondering what H would think of that.

Just behind the stairwell I'd come from, was a platform/floor and I climbed over its ledge without too much effort. It led down a dark unlit and narrow corridor. At the end of it was another stairwell, to my left. It went both up and down. There was a door directly in front of me. A white service door to my right after a short and narrow yard-long hall. Light came through the edges of this white service door and the stairs going up also allowed some natural light in from above, but not much, as it was still very dark in here.

On the stairs, a bunch of young adults (early 20s again) were sat on the steps. They looked at me, but more like through me. I looked back for a moment, but then ignored them. I tried opening the door in front of me but it was well shut and locked. I went back through the narrow corridor I'd come from and then skipped over the gap with the stairs and took a left turn. My mind blocked out the open space with no railings.

There were corridors and rooms this way. Many contrasts of dark and narrow halls with natural light from some windows. The floor was carpeted, not sure what colour, but I remember a cleaning lady. It just looked like a hotel in many regards but the rooms belonged to specific people who worked here or something, like an office area in a university. I can't recall the rest of the dream.

---

Notes:
- In many ways, the last part of the dream was just some mish-mash of my first university's building and my general concepts of offices and temporary living spaces. The presence of the people in their early 20s ties in with the "university" feel.
- It can feel a bit annoying to ask H about the reality and have him only make me dismiss what I'm thinking about, though since then I have tried to imagine the situation occurring differently.
- My leather jacket seems to have been a recurring feature for some recent dreams but I haven't found any particular reason why just yet, since I have not worn it in a long time. The only thing that comes to mind is that feels like a bit of a shame that I just let it sit unused for quite a long time, but on the other hand it is usually too hot for me to wear it.
- Dreams where physical activity occurs are always refreshing for me in some mental sense. Being able to do intense physical activity such as climbing many flights of stairs can feel rewarding and the amount of inordinate pain I would get from doing it in real-life makes it feel like a waste of my energy and time. In dreams my low thresholds of pain don't really materialise and it is often the only time I get a break from feeling pain and discomfort throughout a day.

I'm inside of a building, in Jersey City, NJ. I'm on the top floor. Two man pass by and grab red condoms, one each, from a basket near the exit door. They exit the room, and I'm watching from behind. I aproach the door and across the stair I see a man sleeping in a hospital bed. My vision zooms in, and I could see clearly is John Travolta. He is sleeping deeply after a long travel; I notice he is too close to an edge of the small room, sure enough he rolls over the bed rails and falls to a deeper ground level. I see how he rolls in his blanket, like a burrito, until I loose sight of him. I levitate down towards him and try to focus my view, since is darker in this area. I see him getting out of a small door, he seems confused, and I help him getting back to bed, then I exit the room.

Going on a spaceship
I am sort of talking to a person, but I barely had a view of it. It was really weird. Then we go into a spaceship, which only consists of a few chairs in the back. I am there, along with a few more volunteers. I then hear that we will have to be in this single room for 15 years until anything can happen. I am shocked and want to leave again, but it was too late, and I open the door just to see space. There didn't seem to be a vacuum, so nothing more happened. Then I suddenly had some sort of cable, and I asked one of the volunteers to try and grab it because I want to see if I can go out and look around. For some reason, it was like in a video game, and the interaction for the cable just wasn't set up, so I couldn't do that. I saw that the galaxies were really weird, and physics weren't quite comprehensible in this universe, so there is no way I can really explain how it was.
We suddenly arrive at a building, like an office building, which was really weird and mysterious. We all went out and explored. There were a bunch of tables with computers and paperwork, as well as mugs for coffee. On the floor was a mess of paperwork. There were a lot of windows, simply going out into space. There were zombie-like people laying on the ground. We go to explore further, going into a door in the back, on the left, and there was one of these zombies laying around, which looked like nullbodies from boneworks. There is another person behind me, and I have found a gun somewhere. Suddenly the zombie moves and stands up, and I shout that the zombie has woken back up, and I shoot it until it is dead. If I remember correctly, the volunteer then thanks me. We go into a sort of backroom, but I don't quite remember how it looked. I grab a bunch of pencils to take back with me into the space ship. Suddenly, a volunteer tells me that we have to go, in a sort of annoyed vocal tone, probably annoyed about me taking so much stuff. I run back and put the pencils into my pockets. I then want to take a mug, but it seems to be dirty. The spaceship starts flying without me, making TARDIS noises, and I quickly jump through the door and sit down.

I am somewhere outside? with Melissa, Pepe, and his mom. I think they both look high and then, sure enough, she lets on that they are. She confides in us that Caesar is the head of some pot farm/ selling ring or something similar. I can see it, imagining him and his boisterous personality right now. Now, I am climbing up through some tall and thin wooden structure. I pass through ‘floors’ that are spaces barely bigger than my body. Each side of the space, I think even including the top, is a mirror, making for a trippy experience. I now get to what seems to be the top. It is different because the sides are concave, joining in a small ceiling, and it seems there’s nowhere left to go. I don’t accept this possibility though, and push on one of the sides. It opens and reveals a vast, dim space that I think may be the pot farm.




I am in New York City with Melissa, walking along a sidewalk. The street is busy and I can smell and taste the putrid emissions from passing trucks. The sidewalk is close enough to the street, but it thins even further at one point, leaving hardly any space for foot traffic. We pass a tower with a parabolically curved glass facade. The glass is mostly translucent, but it gets much dimmer higher up. There is a space behind the glass, in which there are large advertisements. Melissa says something about how they won’t even be visible. I agree. We end up in a restaurant that seems familiar (from another dream, I think). I notice a couple about our age in the booth behind us, across from me. They are dressed pretty nice for this place and sitting on the same side. I think about their life. I notice a man in sunglasses sitting alone at a booth diagonal from us. Melissa asks to trade sides, and we do. I look through the fairly short menu and decide I want pretty much the first thing on it, some corn dog things. The waitress, brunette and maybe 30+, comes over and seems out of it, like drunk or sad or something. She gives us a minute. I look at the extensive beer list in the back. They’re sorted by brewery (they must all be local - I don’t recognize any), under the brewery’s logo. The price per beer is then listed after the name, lowest to highest, separated by slashes. Most of the first prices are six to seven dollars, but I see prices like 9,16, 27, 59, etc. I think these prices must be for bottles and/or pitchers but that they’re still ridiculous. I guess that’s just how it is in the city. Nothing sounds too good anyway, so I figure I’ll settle for a slightly cheaper bill. The waitress returns and sits by me, putting her hand on my shoulder. It could be a nice gesture, but with how she is slightly rubbing her hand it is taken a little too far. She takes Melissa’s order and then mine. I say ‘I just found something, where did it go?’, trying to find it again. I find it and tell her while also pointing. She doesn’t say much. She comes back and sits again. This time she reaches over and grabs my crotch. I am a little shocked and put my own hand over it. When I move my hand, she does it again and then leaves. I text or tell Melissa and she just shrugs it off. I want to tell her what kind of reaction there would be if the genders were switched.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening



Meet my father at a train station. He is using crutches and we need to take elevator down. Problem is, dozens of people are taking the elevators and at some point they break. The other people could use the stairs but most just wait for the technician to fix it. Meanwhile we all stand at a balcony that is dangerously giving in to the weight of all the people waiting. My dad assures it is safe, but I try to really stay out of it.

Meeting a group of friends. V. Palmeirim and some other famous dude join in the group. They don't seem to know me. I notice we all are wearing shirts with white and blue patterns, stripes, waves and checkers. I suggest a group photo and we make some nice poses.
We then stay at someone's place. A couple of my friends, Zilla and some other, want to go on an urgent mission to Porto, but it is late in the evening and I warn that we will be out all night if we go now. We take a cab, but the driver stops somewhere to pick up something and delays us even further, so the girls change their mind and agree it is too late to go out on such journey. Back home they are still making contacts and checking other ways to go, but meanwhile we start watching "Across the Universe" on tv and time passes. I say "no way we are going now. It's 10 pm." Then I notice Jaime is among the friends and he also just spotted me watching the film and singing along and he looks like his heart melted. In the morning I go out to the nearby chinese supermarket to buy some stuff. The staircase and lobby of this building is from the 50s and majestic. Everything is grand and high ceiling and huge open space. I am joined by my dog Hachi who is hanging around for no reason. We hug really tight and then he joins me for a walk in the garden of some museum close by.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

At some clinic or whatever. I see Alex outside and I hear some growling and see people running. Go check and see some weird looking beast chasing Alex. I also see a triceratops and other prehistoric animals. People run inside the buildings but some animals also get in so they get out and run away again. When everybody seems gone, I am alone at the ground floor of a building with glass doors and have an encounter with a crocodile. Block its attack with a glass door. Then some girl walks in and doesn't see me, followed by a guy walks who hurts her and then locks her up in some room. Some couple also comes in and they are allies with this guy. Turns out the girl knows something about these animals, some project gone wrong. And I don't know their role, but I stay hidden spying to try to figure it out.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

At my moms, although a slightly different house. It is in the middle of a city. But still at the top floor. On her room is my late grandma, still alive, laying in bed. I am with her. On the next room is my mom, my dad and some other relatives. The wall separating the two rooms cracks horizontally. My dad thinks the house will crack more and I think there has to be a reason behind it. That's when everything starts shaking. Through the window we see other buildings shaking violently and breaking apart. My dog Soraia is with us, I keep her near. Parts of our house start to collapse, like some outer walls. My grandma on the bed falls down with part of the room. My mom cries in panic. I suggest we all move to under the doorstep. When finally things are more stable, we assess the damages in the house. After the shock I say it is time to go outside because is dangerous to stay. My mom offers to go down the building's staircase and I say it should be me going, because I think it is dangerous for her. She insists and I warn her that she might find dead people. We hear a child cry somewhere on the floors below. She goes anyway. I gather my cats on a crate. Fairly easy to do except for Cuscus which forces me to go to the collapsed room looking for him. Meanwhile my mom returns, says the stairs are blocked 2 floors below. Couldn't find the child. We consider staying there until rescue comes but it might take weeks and it is not safe. So we find there is a connection between the roof to other rooftops of buildings that fell over each other. Through there I find ta way for us to reach the street. Most people seem disoriented but we find a group which seems to have a plan and knows where to go. I consider we join them. Then I am warned that some bad dudes are trying to steal one of my pets from where I left them in crates, near a car. But it is not a cat they are taking away, it is a falcon. I run and insult them but eventually the falcon flies away and escapes them. Then I call him back and he lands on my arm.

With friends, at some ancient site, like a temple or palace, awaiting for our Guru's teachings. As we wait for info about what's going to happen, Rinpoche drops by and hands over a bunch of papers with poems. He says we should go make copies, distribute them and study the texts. Then he turns away to leave, but our eyes cross and I understand I should follow him. I follow him through a corridor, I stop seeing, everything is dark and then it's like I enter another time and dimension. The floor is covered in flowers and on both sides of the aisle there are people throwing flower petals and offering precious substances. I spot Rinpoche again at the end of this path and at the entrance of a private garden area. When we are there alone, we kiss. He becomes a young, athletic, beautiful prince, with long hair with a bit tied up on top of his head. I also turn into an Indian looking princess-like beauty with a vaporous white dress. We enjoy the sensual delights of being alone and free to love in this solitary magical retreat. Apparently for a long undisturbed time. We have a son. At some occasion I am bathing in a lake and playing with my boy. From a short distance, I see my love looking at us, very serious. He is majestic and he carries a dagger in his right hand. As he walks towards me, I get in some kind of horny surrendering trance. I get out of the water and I lay down on a stone surface and welcome him in my arms. He lays down with me. But he is talking very seriously about people in some other time and dimension. He says with aggravation that they will at some point stop going to temples and looking for us. They will instead go to shopping and movies and other mundane things and we will have to be with them, among them, doing those things with them, for them. Then I black out and start drifting in what I would describe as the multiverse, a dark void where a myriad of universes are laid out in an infinite geometrical matrix and I see them unfolding in their infinite diversity, overwhelmed.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

Some animal rescue organization tells me there are some cats at a derelict building, which they feed, but fear for them because the building was vandalized during the night. They ask me to go check. When I arrive there I find Rinpoche in casual clothing feeding some kittens and surprised to see me. There is no time to talk as some other people immediately also join us. We look after the kitties.

Later I walk through a park and find a baby duck walking by himself in a strange place. I kneel and he jumps on my lap. I cuddle him in delight. Then spot a lake with other ducks and take him there. But he jumps out of the water and again to my lap. I feel like adopting him but not the best idea.

Go to some expo, don't know what about, but spot some food area and go there. They have Mexican and South American inspired food, all vegan. I wait in line to order something. Try to read the menu but don't know what anything means.

I was in a live action replay on top of a building at night. And became tired of us performing the same replay over and over again. I then approach the person starting our replay and notice they were standing completely still. I then look at the other person performing the replay with me and she was also frozen. She was a video game character from tekken. She was laying down lifeless so I check to see if she was still alive and suddenly it hit me I was lucid dreaming as nothing made sense. I check to see if she was alive and said to the other person that nothing is real. I then lose lucidity.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening


I work at a court in a large building that looks like a mall. It is a very old building and people do tours in it. I catch some tourists visiting the restroom. It is part of the tour because they are antique.

I am being harassed by a female colleague and she pushes me against a wall, says she wants my cunt and touches me inappropriately. I am rescued by a couple other colleagues and they support me in presenting complaint to the police, but because it is a woman, the police doesn't take it seriously. Unfortunately she also has her own friends who support her. We are all working same place. I leave early and go shopping. A store of natural products has some sales and I end up buying an electric toothbrush and a natural hair coloring.

Later I go to work for some guys at the court. Some day they are talking about something boring and I leave. At some other room, I overhear some guys with a plan to destroy the world by releasing nanites. I follow them around to gather intel and watch as they push a button and unleash it on an island just by the coast, that we can see from the window. The nanites destroy a building in 10 sec. I run to tell my colleagues, but they don't understand what I am talking about and why it is urgent. It doesn't take long for us to start feeling the effect. Communications gone, transportation not coming and people in the city are already confused and scared and then cars start having accidents as the nanites eat them.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

I am at an underground labyrinth looking for Dragon Balls. I spot a couple of them moving in different ways through corridors. I follow one direction, with a long corridor ending in huge stairs. It is very dark, so I imagine some lights illuminating the stairs, but not much light comes on. When I reach the top of the stars, I see a torch burning but it still is dark. Then a lady android, 2 meters tall, blocks my path and drags me down. I get rid of her, but she keeps going after me. I go around this place, which now looks like a vintage hotel. I find a kid and a guy, who are husband and daughter of the android lady (also androids). They also want to catch me, but I escape flying. I find a room with two human kids, surprised to see me. They ask me to hide, they are afraid the androids will come and see me. They suggest I go out the window and hang on the ledge outside. It's an old building with heavy wooden frames and it is possible to pass from window to window holding on to the wooden ledges. So I go watch other windows. I see other kids on other rooms. They are desperate to share messages. One girl delivers me a message, says some names and that I have to tell whomever that such and such must do whatever.
At daylight I go back inside the building disguised as cleaning lady. It doesn't work so well. There is an android receptionist who is not fooled, but she is very slow reacting, so I run inside and hide under a table. Then I find a big hall where all the kids are sitting at round tables, cheerful. I deliver them the message from the girl before and they thank me.
Then I have to hide again as androids join in. Later, when they leave, I sit with the kids and eat what seems fried fish. In front of me I see Trevor Noah and we have to share the same glass of water, because there is no other glass available. I joke about it and he seems to feel more awkward than gross.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

At some kind of hotel in the country, boars come down a road around the building and everybody goes see it through the windows. I want to take picture, but I get too late, think I only catch a glimpse. Meanwhile someone's walking a dog and the boars pass right by, peacefully.

Go on the subway with some kid and another adult, we're doing some study and I need to ask people money for the purpose of whatever survey we're doing. We check the coins we got from people and some dude comes to rob us. I fight back, he steals my purse. I chase him, we fight. He says I gotta let go and throws the purse far away. I say I don't care about the money (it is very little) I just want to teach him a lesson. And I beat him really bad.

On top of some building with acoustic resonance, it's made of metal structure. It makes a hum with some organic or digital noises. I have a security clearance for access to this building. I detect threats and detect something weird involving one lab where they do genetic stuff, but also some time related search. Some guy robbed a scientist carrying a new formula on a syringe he thought gave him superpowers, but instead it just ages him very fast. He freaks bout, tries to reverse time on the department of time travels. He opens a portal that has consequences for 2022: the economy will shift and poor will get rich, rich will get poor. The people in charge want to fix the interference, but it reaches public knowledge and the people don't want it changed.

Live in a farm in the middle of nowhere. A couple of dudes on an helicopter with a large package dangling under, land and request asylum. I allow them in, but soon realize they are up to no good. I hear them sating they need to get rid of me, I tell them I don't care what they are really up to. They don't buy it. I say I need to take care of my chores and leave them, but one of them goes after me and sees that the farm is a façade for a secret military complex that I keep. I am actually an AI android or some kind of genetically improved super soldier. They get scared, they think they know what project this might be, they are military too maybe. I manage to dodge them and lock myself in a room making a plan for what to do with these two. Then I go to a flying car and simply leave, locking up the compound with them inside.

I am inside somewhere. There are 1-2 others here; I think they may be familiar [on second thought, they may be strangers - I can’t remember for sure, as I write this later in the day]. This is one room. It is large, cathedralesque, and has the impression of being somewhat ancient. I think there are tan stone pillars set against the walls. The far wall may be curved. It is dark enough for corners to be lost in deep shadows. There’s a body of water in here, the dark obscuring too its depth. There is a man here, closer to the far wall. He is white and I’m pretty sure bald and bare-chested. I think that he is going to really harm one of us (or Melissa?) in one way or another. It’s almost like this is some demented game and/or we can’t escape. We are/will be fighting him. There is blood dripping from one of my hands (*I noticed a cut on my knuckle last night and didn’t know how it got there). There is blood coming from elsewhere too (at this point, it almost looks more like a scene from a movie and like the blood may be on the lens?) I think this man ends up taking Melissa. There is now a screen that is playing a video of psychedelic visuals with weird and slightly disconcerting sounds. I and someone else watch this; it goes on for a while until finally we fast forward it. As it scrolls, I can see it continued until abruptly ending in end credits. Now, I am outside somewhere. This place feel familiar (possibly just in the dream). I think this is the Bay Area. There is a body of water, placid and sort of grey. It surrounds a chunk of land on which grows a large tree with pronounced roots. On the far side of the water is a small dirt bluff, out of which protrudes the end of a tube/pipe. A naked body suddenly slips out of it and into the water. It is Melissa, and she has a black blindfold on. I go grab her and carry her to land. She has come to now, and I talk to her. From what I gather, the weird psychedelic visuals were what she was seeing as she was passed out on the way from wherever to the end of the pipe.



Melissa and I are lying in a bed. There’s a little bed to our left and on it are three little kids. I think they are ours. They seem joyful and content and around three years old.

non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid false awakening

Going to the movies with Riverstone. He thinks it's Star Wars, but it is some parody sketches on Star Wars. And the sound is shitty. Then I am the actor playing it live on the theater. But the other actor that should be there interacting with me did not appear and so the whole thing falls apart. I try to invite the audience to enact the jokes with me but it is a total disaster.

I am with my guru, sort of accompanying him. He doesn't sleep, he also doesn't stay around much, is always going somewhere, meeting people. A monk comes to keep me company, talks about alien abductions and some book author we both seem to know but whose name we don't recall. Then he gets too fond of me and wants some action, but although he is actually cute, I don't want him to break his vows and I say no. Then a giant wave comes from the sea outside, doesn't break the windows, but engulfs the building which gets under water. We pick cell phones and documents and leave. We go to higher floors and get out somehow to dry land. Then we see Rinpoche's students heading to a town square, all dressed up and I ask what's the occasion but nobody says. I sit alone at a bench and I realize I have my cat Buddha hiding in my purse and I hug him.