• Lucid Dreaming - Dream Views




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    1. My Chemical Romance and Snape's Monster (Monday Night and Tuesday Night)

      by , 03-08-2023 at 05:18 PM (Dreamlog)
      Night of Monday 3/6/23

      I'm in a basement dungeon that reminds me of Snape's office from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. There is some argument happening about outfits to wear. Snape is trying to impose some evil magic. One of the kids is transformed into a massive black monster that takes up most of the room. Snape plays the hero and defeats the monster. It was his plan all along. There is a purple glowing scythe that has mind control. It has a mind of its own similar to Nightblood in Brandon Sanderson's Cosmere.

      I'm on the top floor of a mansion house on the beach. The mansion has secret passages, with some rooms off limits. It reminds me of the home containing the wardrobe from Chronicles of Narnia.

      Night of Tuesday 3/7/23

      I'm in a documentary about My Chemical Romance. There is a skyscraper where they supposedly live. They have invented their own version of the color black and are selling a clothing line based on it. There is another scene where there is a party in the skyscraper home. The inside looks like my sister's old rental home. There is some drama going on but can't recall exactly. The documentary goes into some detail about how the band uses cocaine.

      I'm talking to the Pope at the Vatican. Don't recall any context for this.

      Updated 03-08-2023 at 06:20 PM by 99808 (Added Pope fragment.)

      Categories
      non-lucid , dream fragment
    2. WILD Attempt & Zelda Prediction: It's Bad

      by , 02-25-2023 at 06:01 PM (Dreamlog)
      Up at about 4:30AM for a WBTB. No recall from earlier in the night. I've just taken the supplements below for the first time. I'll be back to record later. First impression: Choline smells terrible. Like fishy terrible.

      Update: Laid in bed for a long time. GF's regular weekday alarm went off by mistake a couple times and messed up my rhythm. Eventually I relaxed enough to start feeling WILD vibrations. I got all the way through the process of "going through the wormhole", and I could see a dream in a tiny pinhole at the end. It was my childhood home. I could see my old PC monitor with Runescape on it, but the dream was black around the edges. I forgot that I needed to 'grab' the dream and I missed my opportunity.

      I find myself in my bed and I think to do a nose RC. I can breathe through my nose so I know I'm dreaming. I start to rub my hands together, spin, and demand that the dream stabilize. It doesn't do much, and it feels very unstable and groggy. I try to leave my bedroom but the dream fades. I have a few more false awakenings with similar results. At one point I did spin and see some marked improvement in quality, but not enough to try and pursue a dream goal. I was trying to go to a forest and explore the dream environment.

      I'm in something similar to a fast-food restaurant playscape. There is a pool resort nearby. Sunny day and all that. Looks like a dope vacation spot actually. I'm crawling through the tube tunnels, and eventually come out the other side. There is a group of people playing the upcoming Zelda title, Tears of the Kingdom, on an outdoor TV setup. It is lagging really bad. I'm upset about it being this bad. I wake or otherwise recall nothing beyond this point.

      Regarding the supplements. I did notice a bit of a headache during the attempt (and now still), as well as some stomach discomfort. I felt my heart beating faster but that is most likely attributed to the WILD experience itself. Nothing earth-shattering but thought I should note it.

      Hoping for better results next time. I will say that this is the first time in a long time that I've actually felt the WILD vibrations, tiny victories I guess.

      Supplements: Primary Trigger Combination (1st Attempt)
      Galantamine: 8mg
      Choline Bitartrate: 250mg

      Default = Commentary
      Blue = Dream
      Green = Lucid

      Updated 02-25-2023 at 06:05 PM by 99808

      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid , false awakening , dream fragment
    3. 2 Nov: Wake up with a pain felt in a dream, my teacher finds where I live

      by , 11-02-2022 at 09:37 AM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      I was having some kind of revelatory dream, something that was making me feel amazing and then I felt a strong burning and radiating pain on my left side of my stomach, as if stabbed by a knife. I woke up in agony with a pain I couldn't identify. I feared my spleen may have burst or something, but I grabbed a cold water bottle I had on my nightstand to put against my skin and it eased the pain after a couple minutes. I still don't know what happened.

      I am outside my house, combing my hair after having had a shower, observing someone on the other hill. The person looks like my teacher but it is a woman. I feel sad and wish that he actually comes, then I look at the road leading to my house and I see him walking down the road followed by an Indian band playing music behind him. I smile and wait
      to see what will happen. My teacher goes sit on a chair that's at the end of the path close to me without saying a word and just looks at the landscape. I ask him how did he find me and he says it was hard because my address leads nowhere. I explain my address is correct but does not yet appear on the maps. I realize the cardigan I am wearing is wide open and exposing my breasts, so I cover myself up embarassed, but he is totally unfazed. I say I knew he would find me anyway and that I had been waiting anxiously. Then we stretch our arms to hold each other's hands and as we touch hands I wake up feeling blissful.
    4. 24 Sep: Home invaders and meeting a friend at an antiques store

      by , 09-24-2022 at 09:19 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      There is some stormy weather and can't close my living room window. I keep grabbing my cats to keep them inside while I try to fix it and they seem intent on getting out. Then my house is taken over by some bad people. They want something and I keep pretending I don't know anything about it. Eventually I grab the thing they want from my office and while they are distracted elsewhere and the lights go off because of the storm, I sneak out to the kitchen and leave through the back door. Luckily my dog Hachi is quietly asleep and doesn't make a sound. I hope to get back for my animals soon, but so far I must leave. The bad guys eventually notice I escaped and turn on some floodlights outside trying to spot me. But there is someone else just arriving and getting in the way of the ligths and I take advantage and run through the fields. Much much later I encounter a group of friends and I think I am safe. Except don't seem happy to see me and proceed to hide under some tarps in some construction site. I join them there to find out what's up.

      Something about an expedition and a UFO.

      Shopping with my familty for some crazy but beautiful clothes. I literally get lost in it as my family leaves me there. I decide to check the second floor of the shop, which I never visited. First part is lingerie but then all sorts of antiques for decor. I am amazed with what I find there. Then some crazy obsessed guy is melting down because he collects something and they no longer have new items for him to buy. My first reaction is to think bad of this guy, but then I realiz he has a serious mental condition and he is not guilty of it, so I feel compassion instead. Then decide to take some pics of some items and of the shop itself. Some cute guy seems happy that I find and expose a wooden piece that was hidden under other pieces and he calls his mom to come and see it and asks my help to set it up straight. I do, but the wood starts breaking apart since it's so old. We decide to put it back. He still considers buying it to restore it, it but every time we touch it, it breaks more. Then he flirts with me and I think he wants to go on a date, but I don't. Then I encounter Sevi and she is glad to see me. Actually too glad to see me, considering she's been mad at me for years. We hug and we talk and the other dude disappears. Then she gets a bit too warm and she whispers in my ear she'd like to invite me to go with her to an hotel nearby and I immediately say no and that she got me all wrong.
    5. cccxcviii. Breaking into a shop, Helping Trump, Police central AI computer

      by , 08-22-2022 at 02:16 AM
      2022 July 2nd

      Left recall until late in the day. This one might be in DFLN but I'd have to go find it for linking.

      Fragment:

      I'm outside, night time. I'm with H and we're by some shop or similar place? H works here apparently and he wants to get inside for some reason but it's all closed, so he smashes a window and we get inside. I forget what we do or look for, but I worry about him losing his job for it. (not actually his job)

      (recall gap)

      At some kind of hotel/casino place. I'm at a sub-level lobby, there are some sofas and other comfort things. There's also a slot machine in a corner by a sofa. I'm sitting on the sofa and try out the slot machine one time. It spins and I win, not the best amount it could pay out, but something like 1837? Then I get distracted by someone like Donald Trump who's in the room with me now, I just know that he apparently owns the casino place. He's not feeling too well and we talk about it, possibly something he's eaten. I either tell him I'll get him some help or get him to come to the nearby lift with me.

      (recall gap)

      Something in a similar area, likely still part of the same segment. Elizabeth II is here and is taking part in some kind of tour? There's also some sort of activism going on.



      2022 July 3rd

      Fragment:

      I'm at a dream version of a mix of my old home and the house we live in now. It's early morning, something like 4AM. I am down in the kitchen area which has large sliding pane windows that are also doors, rather than latching windows. Outside, I see police officers in the backyard patio area. The patio has stone flags and a garden table and chairs, as well as some planters. At first I dismiss this and presume they are just being thorough and that they are here because of a neighbour.

      Then a bit later I'm somewhere else in the house, possibly upstairs, and a police officer lady talks to me and tells me that they have to search our house. I don't understand why and feel a bit reluctant and emotional, possibly getting in their way a bit. She tells me that they didn't want to but that it's procedure as set out by the "central AI computer" which tells them what to investigate or something. I still feel distressed by their searching but feel more accepting of it now that they've told me that's it's just something they have to do because the AI told them to.

      Later they're gone and I'm in a version of our bedroom with H; he was asleep through all of this and I'm still a bit distressed as I tell him all about everything that happened.

      (recall gap)

      At one point I'm somewhere in the USA and I get away from California just in time to miss some massive quakes there. I'm in Arizona now maybe? Here there are very large fires or something but I feel safer. Something about a transit hub and talking to people.
    6. 19 Aug: Strange delivery at home, colony on extreme weather planet

      by , 08-19-2022 at 07:20 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At my home, but it functions as an extra-curricular activities centre. Kids are being looked after by a couple adults. Outside, my dogs are getting in trouble at the gate. I go check it out and find Soraia escaped the fence and is somehow outside with two horses. Three people come by for a supposed delivery and I find it strange as I am not expecting anything. I don't let them come in. They say the delivery is for a Joana and insist on getting inside to hand it to her. I say she is my coworker and I'll get her and they are rude to me, saying they can't wait.

      On some kind of colony in a harsh planet. It has beautiful beaches, but we only go outside in certain times and weather conditions. There are really sudden high tides among other extreme events and the sun is really deadly. One day I fail to get home on time and get caught in a rising tide and upcoming high sun radiation. I see another person at risk, with a small kid, and I try to help them out. I dont succeed, but they are lucky and they escape. I, on the other hand, end up near a cave where I seek shelter. I find inscriptions on the cave and a bunch of leafs from a tree floating on a little puddle of water. The inscriptions talk about an ointment from those leaves, which make for an amazing skin protector and I decide to try it. It is truly miraculous and from then on it allows anyone to freely move outside during the day and even go to the "red" side of the planet, which is scorching hot and unhinabitable.
    7. cccxcv. "Chapeling", Red hand portal, Dithering at a car park

      by , 07-07-2022 at 03:00 PM
      2022 June 21st

      Fragment:

      Me and H travel to a place called Chapeling that's apparently near London in southern England. It's a 300 mile drive from where we were? We go there to have a look at this small pipe organ that sits in a little chapel building which is beside a main church building.

      Overcast day outside. Town streets and so on.


      2022 June 22nd

      Fragment:

      Something about showing someone a little organ. At some kind of concert or theatre hall, a vast one at that, but the wood all seems very bare like all its polish has worn off and nobody has taken care of the place for a while.

      (recall gap)

      Something about needing to get some homework done. I have my black laptop bag with me and whatever I need for my homework is in there I think. I keep being distracted or pulled away from doing it and later I am climbing some kind of abstract structure made up of large red long nailed bony hands. It's part of some kind of dimensional portal or threshold.

      Later, on the other side of said portal. Something about Warcraft 3 game mechanics. I want to buy a mini town hall item and destroy a human settlement to take their gold mine.


      2022 June 25th

      Fragment:

      I'm outside, at a Lidl car park. It's about seven in the morning and it's light but not as bright as it should be for this time of the year. I'm deciding whether I should get closer and do some shopping or not. There's a white man in the parking lot. He's getting some stuff ready round the back of his car. At some point I realise the shop won't be open for another hour at least. I dither about for a while, wondering if I should bother crossing the road and going back home or if I should just wait it out. I think it may have felt a bit cool outside.



      Notes:

      - Trying to look for a place called "Chapeling" somewhere near London didn't really result in anything. I suspect the location name in the dream was simply tied to the context of the attached chapel. I've not heard the word before, not in any situation that I can think of anyway, but it's a fairly straightforward construction and likely easily created by automatic and associative dream logic and the like.

      - Unfortunately, I've lost any visual recall I might have had of the abstract structure made up of red hands, which is a shame really because these are often the type of things I like to try and recreate in art. I might still try recreating something alike if I can think of a composition I like.
      -- I still have some visual recall of the rest of the dreaming in this entry, at the time of writing.

      - For some reason I've come to use dithering as an expression more often of late; it's not a new expression to me, but it's not one I've typically used a lot.
    8. Failed dream stabilisation in DILD | [26.05.2022]

      by , 05-28-2022 at 02:23 AM (Draeger's Dream Journal and Documentation)
      Failed dream stabilization in DILD
      I am on my way home, carrying groceries on the sidewalk of the quiet street passing by the house I live in on a cloudy day with a darker lighting of the environment suggesting that the time of day is soon to be or already is dusk. I'm not sure if my mother is with me, but she could be. Suddenly, I become lucid. It might have been a random thought about lucidity which triggered this. But I immediately start slipping out of the dream but try to rub my hands and to look at them to stabilize the dream, but I am already on the threshold of waking up, strangely controlling both my dream and real body at once, but apparently my stabilization attempt soon failed and I find myself having waken up.



      I got too stressed to journal again. I'll probably continue for real once summer holidays come around in nearly exactly a month.

      I actually chanted a mantra and used a special thought technique I can't really explain to kind of bypass the way you'd usually have this only incubate a fake lucid dream instead of actually causing awareness, and I guess it worked. It's like I went "behind" the normal thought? Only I really know what I'm talking about with that, I guess, at least I hope at least I will if I rediscover this some time. Nobody ever understood the way I explained how my brain worked. People tend to think these are metaphors, but I feel like I physically navigate my thoughts. While that's not what happens, of course, that's the input I'm getting and doing the same "movement" produces consistent results. It's weird like that. Also, I'm tired so I'm rambling about this, probably mostly as a big note to self so that I can reproduce this, since this is the first time a technique just straight up worked first try to that extent.

      I do wonder why the stabilization didn't work, though. And I tend to always find myself kind of "blind" in dreams, I've noticed that here as well. It's like my whole vision is covered by a blind spot, like how your thumb disappears if you move it into the right location, it makes it hard to stay in a dream. I feel like I only know some of the visual information because I just kind of know without seeing it, and that's annoying me. But I can't say reality is a whole lot different, honestly. My perception is always weirdly "blind" like that, like a very insidious form of tunnel vision. Enough rambling now. I still think this was probably the closest I've ever gotten to stabilize a lucid dream, so overall, this was a success. Good.
    9. ccclxxxii. The abandoned compound with strange animals and gems, New developments behind home

      by , 05-09-2022 at 11:20 AM
      2022 May 3rd

      Dream:

      I'm somewhere with H, at or near some kind of compound. His dad or a friend of his dad's is around too. There's something about precious stones in the compound, they spawn at random and in areas inhabited by some unusual creatures. It's not a nature reserve or anything like that, it's more like it's been abandoned despite still being apparently owned by someone. One of these strange creatures is a cat thing, the size of a dog and with more legs. It wants scratches but I'm wary of it, as it also wants to escape if given a chance, so I'm mindful about the door and my position. I consider that these animals may all be dangerous.

      I find one of the stones nearby and I leave. I somehow know it's worth 100K or so. I tell H and I feel proud and relieved, since it will be a huge help to us. I think to myself that we should make sure people aren't needlessly making this place known publicly or we won't even get a chance to get some more stones when we need the money.

      Later, a group of people who had also been getting gemstones is near an exit area. One of the people in the group is D, old school friend. Most of them seem a bit greedy, having hoarded many stones, rather than just getting one or two. I say to them that I can't see why they can't be more reasonable, and that I would always try to compromise when possible.

      (recall gap)

      Some other bit, also in some complex?


      2022 May 4th

      Dream:

      (Left recall a bit late)

      I'm at home with H. We go into the kitchen to do something. We're naked? I open the blinds and see a bunch of the neighbourhood kids out the back, some on the walls, others in the yard itself. (Quick note, this actually happened four days later, on the 8th)

      We motion from inside for them to get out and such, and then we go out a side door from the kitchen to the back, where the heart should have been. I lose track of H. In the yard, I see that some of the kids look a bit miserable, they're stuck in here by accident and I now feel sorry for them, and less upset about the fact they're here.

      Then, the back wall changes when I'm not paying attention. It's a cut-down wooden fence and I see loads of people around, playing around, having BBQs and so on. To my right, I see that we're on a sort of large plateau area and there are new apartment buildings in this area, some still being built. About twenty story high each. One has a green-ish and white colour scheme going. It's no wonder there are so many people here, I now feel. I feel annoyed and get into a sort of argument with a random woman, I think she was someone from school. As a character, I express confusion at all this and feel neglected. I ask why they built all this, why didn't the local authority let us know about any of it? And so on. I get unsatisfactory replies and just feel more and more frustrated.

      Later. At a supermarket inside a larger mall. (Like one in A but bigger) Initially I'm with H but then we split up because I need to go swap some pasta cheese ice cream thing. It looks like it has a blue cheese in it. Then, that woman from before again, she shows me some chocolate ice cream like knock-off Magnums. I try a sample or something, and so does she.
    10. ccclxi. Overly friendly woman, discussions, food decisions, Moving painting

      by , 02-27-2022 at 09:03 PM
      Unfortunately, for one reason or another, I keep falling back on my backlog of dreams that I want to put up on this DJ. This is annoying me a bit so I better get back to catching up on myself.


      2nd January 2022

      Some in-line bracketed notes.

      Dream:

      I'm in a version of my current bedroom. The window is across the way from the bed, rather than being to a side. It's sunny and the curtains are open. There's a slightly portly man walking around the room, going on about what was discovered about pork meat, saying he should have known all along and that he was glad he didn't have too much of it in his life. I feel there's some irony considering his physical appearance. (at the time of this dream, I think I felt this had something to do with eating what I like while I can)

      (recall gap)

      Then, in a car outside with H. Again, sunny, clear and bright. We're talking? It's a busy place, in a cobbled street. Looks like certain areas in L. A scantily dressed woman waves at me with a smile from a third floor window. I wave back and say hi quietly, wondering why she was being so friendly, but further thinking that she probably just found me attractive. (not something I've ever thought about regarding someone looking at me)

      Other minor and random interactions in the scope of friendliness with other characters. Me and H talk a bit more. Then, I'm outside the car.

      I'm sort of standing at the midway point of a crossing that people are using. I'm still within talking distance of H and eventually we agree on something and I walk off. (much recall detail was lost, everything was fairly lively)

      (recall gap)

      Then, at a supermarket. I'm walking around trying to find something nice for us to have for lunch, even though some part of me remembers (false memory) making some sandwiches in buns. I end up finding a pastry aisle and I see some meat pasties which I'm interested in getting. I'm not sure where I should put them. I ask an attendant about bags or anything and she says "no, sorry" or something, and I realise that she doesn't actually speak much English. I walk back to the pastries area and eventually spot some paper bags cramped under something. Then, when I grab some they are actually cut out plastic bottles, though I don't realise this during the dream.

      I use two to find two meat pasties which are now in some slick plastic cases and stuff them in the bottles. While I'm walking about I see a load of people at an entrance door and then they're all looking around the aisle. I realise on some level they're students.

      (I woke up at some point and I remember falling asleep thinking about how I didn't realise I was dreaming with the previous night's dreams)


      9th January 2022

      Fragment:

      In old home kitchen. I grab off the counter some ten by ten printed canvas which is wrapped in heatshrink (clear?). On the canvas is a young man and a woman, they're sitting on a boat or something and there's water behind them. They're family somehow; my nephew/niece, but older? She's sitting and wearing a white dress and a broad white hat. She has golden loop earrings. He's standing and wearing something darker, black or navy. Everything in the painting is moving slightly, the waves are alive and the two are looking towards the point of view and smiling.

      (this dream was especially vivid in my mind at the time for a while and the idea of a canvas with moving imagery was very exciting at the time)
    11. cccxlix. Poor package delivery service, Diablo II character armour

      by , 01-18-2022 at 06:47 PM
      15th November 2021

      Fragment:

      Outside on our street. I am coming to see H, who's arriving in the van. He's parked on the opposite side of the road. It's dark outside, but doesn't seem like it's either night or day? I pick up a delivery that was left for us on the pavement, rather than through the door. I open the van passenger door and talk to H about the package and how I find what they did to be annoying. Someone's on the passenger seat, maybe H's sister, A?

      Just before this, I'm in the front room doing something and the light is on. I think the curtains are open?

      Earlier, some bit on Diablo II where I'm checking how different armour plates look on the barbarian (looks more realistic than he should?).
    12. 10 Jan: Home invaders, chased by Kylo Ren and accidentally act in a novela

      by , 01-10-2022 at 10:28 PM (Lucid-schizo-dreamer)
      non-dream dream semi-lucid lucid FA / AP

      At home, but it looks like my paternal grandma's house. I hear suspicious noises, I go check the backdoor, see if it is locked. It is not even closing properly, but I manage to shut it. Then my mom says she hears the elevator stopping at every floor, so that means we are actually at her house, not grandma's.
      Someone knocks, they say it's delivery of a package, but sounds suspicious. My mom says "Ah, ok" and goes open the door. I yell "no!", but it is too late. Some dude hands over a package and she thanks him. But then he steps in and I know he ain't no good, so I tell him to leave immediately and push him over. Outside are more guys. At first I manage push the first guy back, but the door ain't closing well and they barge in. I panic, but they don't actually resort to violence or seem intent to rob or rape. It's a gang of 3 dudes and a couple girls. They are basically tricksters and just want to fool around, for now. They go around checking our things and I think about what could be valuable and important to me and I try to hide those things. But they spread around to cover more area and I can't keep up. The house is magically very big and has half a dozen halls, each one dedicated to a specific thing, almost like a supermarket with aisles. First area is a library, then there is one for sports, one for entertainment, with a dj and vj set (which attracts the gang leader in particular), then there is an armory, which I try to reach first. But they get there ahead of me and grab some riffles. Fortunately the bullets are all elsewhere and they want to know where. I keep quiet and the leader guy gives up and goes for a different strategy. Goes to the entertainment area and grabs some equipment and starts singing. Then he becomes Pedro A., a musician I loved as a teen. He goes all charming and tries to seduce me. I say his charm won't work on me. So then they decide to go violent and I kick one of them, tell them I am a purple belt in Kenpo and can defend myself. They seem mildly scared but that quickly fades. They know I am very outnumbered. I am also not confident at all in my skills, I don't practice for years. But I find a stick and I attack them with it, knocking them all unconscious, except for a girl. I ask my mom - which I didn't see until now - to help me tie them up. When they regain consciousness, I tell them I am calling the cops and I ask for their names so I can tell the cops. They get very pissed.

      I meet Kylo Ren. He drives a small car. I start flirting with him. He misunderstands and thinks I am harassing him. He gets upset and chases me. I fly away to escape. I fly along the path of the road until I spot some people taking a shortcut through some field and I decide to folllow them and maybe lose Kylo who is after me. The shortcut takes me to a football field where kids are playing. Then just to the side is a neighborhood, which has a familiar vibe to it. I recognize my mom's building among other buildings inthis neighnorhood. I lift off to the 4th floor, to enter the house through the window. But then I spot there is a wood storage at ground floor and I go back to get some as I recall we need wood for the fireplace (which doesn't really exist at my mom's, but anyway...). When collecting some wood, I get caught in the middle of some actors filming a novela. They don't stop because of my presence and so I become accidentally part of it. I leave the wood for later, now I suddenly feel like baking a cake in the novela's kitchen. I grab some eggs and flour and I temporarily put them down on top of the washing machine because they are blocking my passage to the counter. The actors are playing a very rich family who is fighting over properties and possesions and I guess I am their cook. The flour bag is leaking and the machine dirty with flour. The family also sees it and scolds me for it. The head of the family says that shit might damage the machine which is expensive and it will be on me any repairs or replacement needed. And I am like "Damn, they can afford all the machines they want and are seriously making me pay for it. How petty."

      Updated 04-08-2022 at 09:17 AM by 34880

      Categories
      non-lucid
    13. cccxxxviii. Games, Pressured by others, Decision made without consulting me

      by , 10-31-2021 at 02:39 AM
      4th October 2021

      Scraps:

      (a long dream, but poor recall)

      Some RTS segment and I recall beaches and water.

      One part a bit Minecraft-like or some other game. T is here and someone else is with me? Some kind of tower, or otherwise large structure.

      One of the last parts of the dream, I am my alter-ego and there are interactions with me as such. The other people are dream-generated. They seem to be pressuring me, or something? Despite my form, I feel slightly shorter than others.

      Some other dream? H has convinced mom and dad to bring S over here. I think H goes to pick them up and I remember seeing them all at one point. I feel concerned about S because of all the usual reasons regarding costs and also because of the long trip.

      Notes:


      - The last part was certainly a reflection of how I sometimes don't feel listened to or validated on, regarding both matters of money and of companionship. In the segment, some beliefs I hold as very important are partly betrayed by my closest, besides the fact I feel it may be detrimental to both S's health and to my financial situation.

      - That same segment probably also relates to how I have often been very easily upset by changes to what a situation is and changes to what it would be or would have been.

      - More recently it has been more frequent for me to take on my alternate form in my non-lucid dreams. In this case, the context likely relates to my art and some perception that the expectations of others are above my own. My stature is clearly metaphorical in regards to my feelings in terms of recognition, but this dream element also relates directly to some of my choice themes and how I've often felt physically inadequate in some specific areas (primarily to my own expectations) when compared to others.
      -- I do not recall what exactly the other people were pressuring me about, but in terms of my waking life contexts, art is the most directly relevant context here.
    14. cccxxi. Minefield, Special Lego piece

      by , 08-30-2021 at 10:55 AM
      24th August 2021

      Fragment:

      At a place outside. It's sunny, looks a bit like my native country. Sort of dry grass and possibly some forest in the distance. I'm at or near some old concrete slabs, partially covered by dirt, sand and grass. There's a very tidy and organised minefield in a certain direction, that I'm aware of. It follows a square grid pattern. Other people are nearby but I forget who.

      Fragment:

      A bit like our home here. Some kind of mechanism and wooden surfaces that move on a single axis. They have metal sockets and plugs that allow them to interconnect vertically. Then outside, at the back. I hold a thin piece of 2x2 Lego plate towards H, who's in our yard just over the wall. There's some kind of visible electromagnetic flow between the Lego piece and something H is holding. Now the Lego displays an amperage reading on its top face, and I show H while also making some comment about it.

      Then I remain on the bit outside of our back yard. This area is different from how it should be, it feels more open and more natural. I forget what I'm doing but I know that H is putting up an old silver-coloured plastic TV at the back, it has something to do with conclusions we drew on before because of the EM flow. Some neighbour from the house right next to ours (but not actually), the one on the left if I'm looking from the back, he talks to us and says something about a party game and wishing there were players, or something? We invite them to play, I think. Then I'm like in some kind of Sims game (the party game) but the scale of the property grid is reduced and simplified.

      I wake up around this point, after I've built some simple house walls in the game.



      25th August 2021


      Initial recall was good but I didn't bother with making initial notes.

      Scraps:


      Something about a school or university, and learning.
    15. Hanging out

      by , 08-12-2021 at 11:04 PM (DJ of lucid goals and how it goes)
      I'm flying over town half lucid. I see Elina and wonder why it's always my family I meet in my dreams. This thought triggers it so that a friend of Elina appears next to her and I interact with her instead. She is blonde and tall with a face of someone who takes a lot of energy. We walk down to my house and go to the guest room downstairs. We cuddle and an enchanting atmosphere is there. She is not very interested in me but I am happy. An old evil man enters and I escape by flying through the window. I ask her if we can meet up somewhere else and she agrees. I fly to a building and meet up with her later on in a different house. I don't want to break the window and walk in through the door instead.
      Tags: cousins, flying, home, love
      Categories
      lucid , non-lucid
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